Author Topic: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?  (Read 13692 times)

FuckRx

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anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« on: May 01, 2014, 04:08:36 PM »

My second "regret" post but I guess I'm contemplative today. I have always worked a lot of hours due to my career path in general. But I'm at a position in life where I could still reach many of my goals even if I worked only a regular 40 hours but I'm doing 60 hours+. Everyone around me tells me that I'm wasting my youth, missing out on a social life etc and that I will likely regret this when I'm in the 40's 50's. Anyone spend their 30's working a lot and regret not being more social/spend time with friends?

marty998

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #1 on: May 01, 2014, 04:22:01 PM »
I regret working too much in my 20's now...

Would like to have my 30's to catch up on all the fun I missed these past 10 years.

James

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #2 on: May 01, 2014, 04:23:17 PM »
No.


I regret not playing more in my 30s, but it's the time to be working hard and playing hard.

mozar

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #3 on: May 01, 2014, 05:36:35 PM »
I hear that a lot, the have fun in your "insert decade here" trope. i'm glad i worked so hard in my twenties because now i have the experience and knowledge to take a job working 40 hours instead of 70, and I am established in my career. I don't want to work in my thirties but I think I would rather work when I'm younger to enjoy life more later.
I can already feel my energy decreasing and in my mind having fun now means having to work more later when I have less energy to deal with work BS. And it really depends on your definition of fun. I grew up working class so seeing money pile up in my investments is "fun." Being broke because I'm spending all my money on booze and women is not my idea of fun.
That said I don't think that working 60+ hours a week is a good idea. If you have no time for friends and family that is not just about fun it's about getting your needs met outside of work.  Can you find a job working 40? A year and a half ago I had the choice to make 65k for 40hrs or 75k for 60+. I took the 65k.

dragoncar

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #4 on: May 01, 2014, 05:43:39 PM »
Anyone regret not working enough in their 30's?

RootofGood

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #5 on: May 01, 2014, 05:46:16 PM »
I sort of regret working so hard in college.  In hindsight, I wish I drank a few more beers and did slightly worse on my exams.  Although who knows if I would have ended up where I did today if my academic marks weren't as good.

Eric

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #6 on: May 01, 2014, 05:47:54 PM »
I doubt you'll regret it if you're retired in your 40s

RootofGood

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #7 on: May 01, 2014, 05:55:32 PM »
I doubt you'll regret it if you're retired in your 40s

I know one thing.  I'm glad I didn't work any harder than I did in my 20's and 30's.  I managed to put in 40 hours or so each week, rarely more.  Still did pretty good reaching FI.  I almost went into BigLaw where 60+ hour weeks are apparently common.  After determining the after tax per hour pay rate wasn't that much better than that available in the engineering field, I chose the easier career. 

brewer12345

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #8 on: May 01, 2014, 06:38:46 PM »
I doubt you'll regret it if you're retired in your 40s

I missed out on a lot between age 25 and 35.  Most of it I don't mind so much in hindsight, especially since I got the most important stuff in.  What I do regret is missing certain experiences that are best experienced young.  As I get older (ripe old age of 40), I am more set in my ways, conservative/risk averse, less tolerant of crowds and cities, and of course there is the creeping physical degeneration that has just started.  Ah well.  You don't get everything right in life.

Emilyngh

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #9 on: May 01, 2014, 08:15:14 PM »

I know one thing.  I'm glad I didn't work any harder than I did in my 20's and 30's.

This.   I just turned 33 and I'm semi-retired (with DH a SAHP).    I don't necessarily regret working as hard as I did (b/c it helped to get me where I am now), but I am glad I've started to ramp it down over the last 4 years or so.   

limeandpepper

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #10 on: May 01, 2014, 08:19:58 PM »
I think I will regret it if I work a lot at any decade in my life, which is why I'm not going to. In fact, I don't even want to be working 40-hour weeks consistently throughout the whole decade, let alone 60-hour weeks.

spoonman

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #11 on: May 01, 2014, 08:38:21 PM »
Sometimes I do look back and definitely feel like I've worked a bit too much.  But then I realize that the second half of my thirties will be in complete freedom and all regrets evaporate.

One thing I'm trying to do these days is focus on the road ahead.

Dr. Doom

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #12 on: May 01, 2014, 09:50:14 PM »

The two years of my life where I have had to work 60+ I was absolutely miserable, ended up quitting the job.  That number of hours means you're not doing anything but work, getting to work, getting home from work, putting food in your food hole, watching How I Met Your Mother, doing laundry, and going to sleep.  Never again and yes I regret both of those years, I should have quit and moved to a different employer much earlier.

I've been in my industry for 14 and those two years feel emotionally like half of my working career.   There's an enormous difference in quality of life between 40 and 60 because those last 20 hours are starting to come out of vitally important activities like dating and seeing family and building relationships with people outside of work.  I think I have mild PTSD from those years.  I wish I were kidding.

In your OP you mentioned you could probably get away with being closer to 40, can I ask why you're going 60, is it because you are hourly or booking billable hours?  Is your job more stable if you are seen to be working more? 

 


MrsPizzaGeek

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #13 on: May 01, 2014, 10:08:12 PM »
I'm in my early thirties and worked my butt off in my 20s so now I am in a position that I can have a little more liberty with my work hours. I figure if you are in a good place right now and can cut back try it. If it doesn't work you know what to do to get going again!

thepokercab

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #14 on: May 01, 2014, 10:32:29 PM »
Wife and I worked our asses off in our 20s, but spent it all on travel, booze, drugs, dinners and friends.  Probably in that order.  I didn't have YNAB yet so who knows. 

Now we're 30- with kids.  So I guess i'll be working my ass of in my 30s so that I can can stop working once I turn 40.  I do think how close we could be to FI right now if we had saved in our 20's, but oh well- I think it will all worked out.   

RealCanadianSavings

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #15 on: May 01, 2014, 11:02:47 PM »
I work 50 hrs most weeks. It's OK. FI is only a few years away. I wouldn't work more though.

FuckRx

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #16 on: May 01, 2014, 11:54:58 PM »

In your OP you mentioned you could probably get away with being closer to 40, can I ask why you're going 60, is it because you are hourly or booking billable hours?  Is your job more stable if you are seen to be working more? 

 

really it's only because I wasn't to be able to put more money away faster. I can definitely get away with just doing 40. but going 60-70 gets me closer to FI faster.

deborah

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #17 on: May 02, 2014, 01:07:25 AM »
At one stage there weren't enough people at work, so I effectively did two jobs. I got a lot of money, as I earnt at least 30 hours overtime a week during that time. However, my life was shot, and I became an unpleasant person to work with, so I didn't get promoted. I wouldn't do it again. It is difficult to be frugal in such a situation, as you concentrate only on work, and don't think about other things. I was single and bought most meals during this time...

ender

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #18 on: May 02, 2014, 06:04:46 AM »
Thanks for posting this.

I'm in my twenties and am constantly balancing "working a lot and making more" vs living life. I've had optional overtime to 50 hours/week that I have been taking pretty consistently (which granted is not at all 60+ hours a week many of you are describing).

former player

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #19 on: May 02, 2014, 06:50:33 AM »
In my time I went straight through school/undergrad/postgrad/full-time professional work, started paying into a pension at 22 and by my 30s was working a rewarding and sought-after job, albeit with long hours and a fair amount of international travel.  That enabled me to jump ship into FIRE at 50.

People following the same track now definitely seem to have gap years built into their schedule.  It's partly a generational change (more kids with their parents' or grandparents' money behind them, more need to do unpaid internships and the like to get on a career track) as well as kids in general seeming more worldly wise and globally connected than in my day.  But they start work later, start paying into pensions later, and are looking at steadily rising state pension ages.

I didn't have the money or the personal nous to either take or benefit from gap years in my teens/twenties.  No regrets at how it all turned out - unlike many I can easily say in my 50s that "my life has got better and better as it has gone on, I'm enjoying it more than ever and the future holds no worries".

HairyUpperLip

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #20 on: May 02, 2014, 06:52:31 AM »
Enjoying the responses. I just turned 30 myself a few days ago.

I guess to reflect on my 20's... I worked a lot at some points (when I was earning lower wages) and at one point I moved cross country to pursue a whole new career and pay scale. Man, I loved it. I was working 55-60 hours a week regularly. I loved it though.

I wish I had just been smarter and saved better. Thats all I can really say - I'm glad I had some fun in my 20's and everyone should but man if you can even save a little bit in your 20's it will help out big time.



S0VERE1GN

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #21 on: May 02, 2014, 07:10:05 AM »
Anyone regret not working enough in their 30's?

Ah, now THERE is the question.

EscapeVelocity2020

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #22 on: May 02, 2014, 07:15:08 AM »
Turned 40 last year, so I should have a clear picture of how I feel about my 30's, but it's all a blur from college to now.  In college and my early career I worked too much and as a result was super desperate for FI.  Switched jobs in 2007 and have much more flexibility and job security, so I had less complaints.  Now that I'm past my FI number, I'm enjoying work since it's on more on my terms, so overall I would say I don't regret any of the hard work in my 20's and early 30's.

rubybeth

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #23 on: May 02, 2014, 07:22:44 AM »
I'm in my 30s, and I think I would regret working more than 40 hours a week unless it allowed me to retire in half the time or something, but I really value work/life balance and good boundaries with work and my real life. My job recently switched from exempt to non-exempt, so now I must leave after my 40 hours are in each week. I already come in earlier than most of my co-workers (and therefore, leave at 3:30 each day), but leaving early on a Friday is particularly delicious. I'd rather spend my time with family and friends than at work. And I've had opportunities to 'move up' in my profession, but my flexible schedule and very few evenings/weekends are so lovely, it would have to be a really huge salary increase, and then maybe not even then.

arebelspy

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #24 on: May 02, 2014, 07:32:27 AM »
I don't do regrets/"Wish I had" stuff, but I could have worked harder in my 20s, and, more importantly, educated myself sooner.  Lots of wasted potential there.

If I could do it again, I'd work much harder in my 20s.

Ah well.  It all works out.  :)
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FuckRx

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #25 on: May 02, 2014, 11:23:04 AM »
Anyone regret not working enough in their 30's?

Ah, now THERE is the question.

in my humble opinion it's very different looking back on something one didn't do as opposed to something that one did. As for having regrets, it's probably not a positive mindful exercise to look back and lament. However if a lot of people here regretted working too much because it burnt them out or it didn't give them the satisfaction/end result they were looking for I would perhaps rethink my schedule.

RootofGood

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #26 on: May 02, 2014, 11:30:11 AM »
in my humble opinion it's very different looking back on something one didn't do as opposed to something that one did. As for having regrets, it's probably not a positive mindful exercise to look back and lament. However if a lot of people here regretted working too much because it burnt them out or it didn't give them the satisfaction/end result they were looking for I would perhaps rethink my schedule.

As long as your life has enough meaning and fulfillment today, don't worry about working too much. 

You might also look at the inverse of work - leisure time.  Would you be substantially more content with a couple extra hours of leisure time each day and/or an extra day off each week?  For example, if you have 10 hours per week of pure leisure time right now, would it be worth it to convert 20 hours of time worked to 20 hours of leisure?  That would triple your leisure time.

That's the kind of analysis I did early on that pointed me in the direction of jobs and career tracks that would provide enough leisure time but might push my FI date out a few years.

soccerluvof4

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #27 on: May 02, 2014, 11:32:18 AM »
No!! I worked my butt off in my mid 20's to early 40's and don't regret any of it. What i do have some regrets about is what i did with the monies i earned!

Tyler

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #28 on: May 02, 2014, 01:39:38 PM »
Anyone spend their 30's working a lot and regret not being more social/spend time with friends?

While it was fun, I regret developing the bad habit in my 20s (as a result of working a lot) of depending exclusively on work friends for my social scene. This came back to bite me in my 30s when I got into the job-hopping & business travel scene where I worked just as hard but had few meaningful relationships in my life. So it's not just about how much you work but also how you build your friendships.
« Last Edit: May 02, 2014, 01:51:09 PM by Tyler »

Badass by 41

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #29 on: May 02, 2014, 01:40:45 PM »
Yes, but only because I didn't save enough in my 20's.

Like arebelspy I mostly just regret the wasted potential.  I didn't know any better, and I wish I had.

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #30 on: May 02, 2014, 02:00:40 PM »
I don't really mind having worked so hard, but I do regret being competitive in working hardest/longest.  I always wanted to be the first one in and the last one out.  Otherwise, I felt if I wasn't available 100% of the time, then I was letting someone down.  About  8 years ago I made the switch from salaried employee to hourly and boy, do I realize what a sucker I was for all those years!  I was working like a dog for someone else to get paid a lot of money. 

tipster350

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #31 on: May 02, 2014, 02:08:00 PM »
Yes, I regret working too much and being unfocused, which led to me working too much for very little gain.

I think I would feel better about the hours worked if I had more to show for them and could RE. So I suppose the real regrets are

-Not focusing and not being more strategic in my career decisions
-Not saving enough

Now I am working feverishly to make up for lost time. But I am making sure that I enjoy life also, because another thing that happens as one gets older is you realize how fleeting life can be.

FuckRx

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #32 on: May 02, 2014, 02:18:30 PM »

Now I am working feverishly to make up for lost time. But I am making sure that I enjoy life also, because another thing that happens as one gets older is you realize how fleeting life can be.

in a way I am doing the same. I figure the money I've squandered from age 28-36 is over 200k. Not an easy amount to "make up" for but I guess it makes me feel better that I'm trying. And I agree there has to be a balance. A social life is critical.

rebel100

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Re: anyone regret working a lot in their 30's?
« Reply #33 on: May 02, 2014, 02:25:01 PM »
I don't really regret much of what I did, it's been a fun and rewarding ride.  I do lament the passing of opportunities.  My oldest is 20, youngest is 14 knowing that they are soon leaving the nest weighs heavily on my heart.  Not saying don't work...but man I will probably never say I wish I had spent a few more hours at the office.

My goal right now is to build a legacy of some sort to leave behind.  Real-estate, a family business, lots of love, some things that are tangible to the ones I care about.