RMD - when you say that you are ready to be "all in", what does that look like to you? Can you be almost "all in" and still get to your goals? As nawhite mentions, there are many things that you can do, that does not require your husband to be on board - be a role model. Take charge of the finances like insurance decisions, meal planning, grocery shopping, vacation budgets, etc. Get him to meet you in the middle on "pocket money". I'm in a very similar situation as you. My husband isn't interested in canceling cable (even though we rarely watch TV!) or downsizing our ridiculous house (we built it ourselves so a lot of emotional and sweat equity in it), but he's a great DIY guy!
However, to address your comment about saving for your own FI goal. That's exactly what I decided. In the beginning, I kept talking about being retired - all he could think about was me sitting around in my sweat pants eating ice cream out of a tub! So, I changed the conversation to one of having FU money, that resonnated better with him. One thing I think helped, is that I sat down with him and had a serious conversation about how unfulfilled I was at work and that I wanted to do something different (and it didn't involve sweatpants and ice cream!). It was useful that I was able to paint a picture of what life would be like once I left my job and it helps him 'buy-in' to my vision of the future, even if he would still prefer to work until he's 55. I may have batted my eyes and pouted my lips, I can't say for sure. He wants to see me happy and so agreed that we should be saving fairly aggressive to meet that goal.
All that being said, I still weave stories into our conversations about this couple who worked really hard, saved their money, and now they don't "have" to work anymore, but they still do on things that interest them, like carpentry; and told him about MMMs Hawaii gig - he thought that was pretty cool. And I walk the talk. In the beginning, he would say things like, you can turn the heat up, we can afford it you know. "I know, but it just seems silly when I can easily put on a sweater....now come cuddle and keep me warm" -- I don't make it about the money, I make it about being efficient, smart, not wasteful, seems like the right thing to do, etc.-- this appeals to his DIY/engineer sensibilities. Think about what communication style appeals to your husband and "talk his language".
What I have noticed over the past 2+ years since I've been reading MMM, is that my hubby has definitely changed his mindset on consumerism, so I feel I have made a big win in that regard. I take opportunities to point out things that are silly, wasteful, etc., and to show him our wall chart on where we are with our savings, etc. It has all helped change his thinking and his actions. He will never be "all in", but at least he doesn't sabbotage my efforts and understands and supports the goal I'm trying to reach.