You were all correct. They wouldn't talk to me because my wife was primary on the account. When she called, the first person was rather rude and hung up on my wife. She called back and got someone else the next time, and that person cheerfully complied with our requests.
Still annoys me to no end, though. You can't turn auto renew off online, you can't cancel your account online, you have to call them...I guess so they can make a play to keep you. I don't like auto renew on anything.
Since I got into the stachian way of life, the only person who can be frivolous with my money is ME. No one else gets a shot at it...or else! :) And when I'm foolish with my cash, I punch myself in the face once for every 5 bucks, too. If it goes over a hundred, I take a baseball bat to my shins. Oh yes, I'm playing for keeps.