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Around the Internet => Antimustachian Wall of Shame and Comedy => Topic started by: Holyoak on February 23, 2019, 12:56:12 PM

Title: You'll never retire...
Post by: Holyoak on February 23, 2019, 12:56:12 PM
Excuse my language, but I hate this fucking ad, and everything it stand for and implies.  Go fuck yourself Timberland.

(https://amp.businessinsider.com/images/59e8b253909924b3208b4f47-750-563.jpg)
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: bluebelle on February 23, 2019, 01:43:13 PM
holy shit.....I hate it too.....I hadn't seen it.....there are alot of commercials that piss me off.....I'm judged by the car I drive, I deserve 'x' and all that shit.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: Holyoak on February 23, 2019, 02:20:27 PM
holy shit.....I hate it too.....I hadn't seen it.....there are alot of commercials that piss me off.....I'm judged by the car I drive, I deserve 'x' and all that shit.

I'm glad I'm not the only one.  I have a near air-tight ad blocker for my laptop, do not own a TV, or have watched TV in nearly seven years... Aside however for the one time a year I will avail myself, to get a full-on zeitgeist upload of US culture.  That one time is watching the SuperBowl for the commercials.  WOW, the absolute apex of the banal, misandry, white guilt, and piss-poor creative value.  It's as if I leave a desert island for a few hours, and can't wait to return to my hut.

It's all FUD, gain happiness and strength via the diminishment of others through suffering, zero sum game, pray on and exploit hopelessness, be a good little worker, pay your taxes and STFU, complete cell phone addiction, impatient manners, no depth of thought, ability to critically think, a mass of sheeple oblivious to it, and even if they did know, they still would not care a lick...  What a con, and I can't imagine what ad agencies must think, esp as it relates to things like FB, Instagram, all these fucking lookie me, dopamine hit junkie producing sites...  Ad execs: They willingly give us what without any effort from us?, they do what, gladly handing over their privacy and freedom?...  My God, they must laugh their asses off, completely dumbfounded at the ease of it all.

Makes me think of this guy, just before the explosives:

(https://i.postimg.cc/VsXB5TKT/9-EF288-DF-BFCA-465-D-978-D-B56916-D42512-png.jpg)

 
 
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: SpeedReader on February 24, 2019, 08:01:20 PM
That ad sucks in ways its makers don't even understand.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: Linea_Norway on February 25, 2019, 12:50:22 AM
That ad sucks in ways its makers don't even understand.

+1

How to make your customers feel so depressed they don't even want to go on a hiking trip anymore?  They are connecting their brand to feeling depressed. What a good sales trick.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: DadJokes on February 26, 2019, 12:12:35 PM
However, their boots are fantastic. I've had the same pair for close to a decade.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: PDXTabs on February 28, 2019, 03:29:16 PM
Not with that attitude you won't.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: pecunia on February 28, 2019, 04:54:12 PM
They look like steel toed work boots.  I guess a guy who was going to do road construction, concrete pours or logging might think twice before buying those boots.  Whoever wrote that had a twisted sense of humor.  It probably occurred to him that this was to be his fate.  Then he pulled out another cancer stick, lit it and grinned.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: Cool Friend on March 01, 2019, 10:38:57 AM
So quirky and fun to normalize a nation of people programmed to work themselves to death.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: Just Joe on March 02, 2019, 10:27:22 AM
That Timberland shop is in Hong Kong. Aren't they worse work-a-holics than Americans or is that just Japan?
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: JAYSLOL on March 02, 2019, 04:45:33 PM
The ad would have been a lot better worded like this "Your boots shouldn't retire before you do"
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: dignam on March 03, 2019, 06:26:33 AM
holy shit.....I hate it too.....I hadn't seen it.....there are alot of commercials that piss me off.....I'm judged by the car I drive, I deserve 'x' and all that shit.

I'm glad I'm not the only one.  I have a near air-tight ad blocker for my laptop, do not own a TV, or have watched TV in nearly seven years... Aside however for the one time a year I will avail myself, to get a full-on zeitgeist upload of US culture.  That one time is watching the SuperBowl for the commercials.  WOW, the absolute apex of the banal, misandry, white guilt, and piss-poor creative value.  It's as if I leave a desert island for a few hours, and can't wait to return to my hut.

It's all FUD, gain happiness and strength via the diminishment of others through suffering, zero sum game, pray on and exploit hopelessness, be a good little worker, pay your taxes and STFU, complete cell phone addiction, impatient manners, no depth of thought, ability to critically think, a mass of sheeple oblivious to it, and even if they did know, they still would not care a lick...  What a con, and I can't imagine what ad agencies must think, esp as it relates to things like FB, Instagram, all these fucking lookie me, dopamine hit junkie producing sites...  Ad execs: They willingly give us what without any effort from us?, they do what, gladly handing over their privacy and freedom?...  My God, they must laugh their asses off, completely dumbfounded at the ease of it all.

Makes me think of this guy, just before the explosives:



Absolutely love this song by APC; sums up our dopamine addicted culture pretty damn well, with a nice call to action.  "willingly been rewired by clever agents within" and "So we dive like crows toward anything glittering" ...fucking brilliant.  One of the best live performances I've ever seen too; couldn't believe how quiet the arena was during the slow quiet part of the song, then just erupted as the band came back in.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u05S9cq2bLY

of course you have to wait a few seconds to skip an ad lol...
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: AnnaGrowsAMustache on March 03, 2019, 03:04:11 PM
How does this work as a sales tactic? Is the viewer supposed to be 'sigh, no money, no retirement, life on the rat wheel sucks, I wish I were OH HAAAAAAAY BOOTS!'?
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: Bloop Bloop on March 03, 2019, 04:01:02 PM
So quirky and fun to normalize a nation of people programmed to work themselves to death.
Well, it sort of helps to have people stuck in shitty low paid jobs as it keeps prices low and helps grease the wheels of capitalism.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: honeybbq on March 04, 2019, 12:17:28 PM
The ad would have been a lot better worded like this "Your boots shouldn't retire before you do"

You should totally pitch that to them.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: JAYSLOL on March 04, 2019, 03:15:45 PM
The ad would have been a lot better worded like this "Your boots shouldn't retire before you do"

You should totally pitch that to them.

It would totally sell more boots.  A positive association works a lot harder to get people buy an idea or product than a negative one.  It's why Nike's slogan is "Just do it" and not "Don't bother, you'll never succeed", and why McDonalds slogan is "I'm lovin it" and not "Becasue you were never going to eat healthy anyways".
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: WhiteTrashCash on March 04, 2019, 03:26:39 PM
Feeling pretty good about having bought LL Bean boots right now. Good Lord.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: Holyoak on March 04, 2019, 04:51:52 PM
Feeling pretty good about having bought LL Bean boots right now. Good Lord.

...And I'm feeling good about my 36 year old, made in the USA Rocky work/hunting boots.  One of my most prized possessions.  Good Lord indeed.

Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: LetItGrow on March 05, 2019, 05:05:53 PM
Feeling pretty good about having bought LL Bean boots right now. Good Lord.

...And I'm feeling good about my 36 year old, made in the USA Rocky work/hunting boots.  One of my most prized possessions.  Good Lord indeed.

Oh man, you beat me! My Rocky boots turned 25 three weeks ago. Military insulated.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: TexasRunner on March 08, 2019, 01:16:38 PM
That sign is garbage....

What a crappy ad campaign. Sheesh.  Whats worse is some Execs at Timberland thought that was a good idea.  It was approved for crying out loud.  That says just as much to me as some 30-somethings ad creator coming up with it.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: Slow road to freedom on March 13, 2019, 02:48:36 PM
The ad would have been a lot better worded like this "Your boots shouldn't retire before you do"

You should totally pitch that to them.

It would totally sell more boots.  A positive association works a lot harder to get people buy an idea or product than a negative one.  It's why Nike's slogan is "Just do it" and not "Don't bother, you'll never succeed", and why McDonalds slogan is "I'm lovin it" and not "Becasue you were never going to eat healthy anyways".

+1
Made me laugh out loud on the train .... no point explaining this one, too many smug Timberland-wearing customers ...
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: WhiteTrashCash on March 13, 2019, 03:42:44 PM
Feeling pretty good about having bought LL Bean boots right now. Good Lord.

...And I'm feeling good about my 36 year old, made in the USA Rocky work/hunting boots.  One of my most prized possessions.  Good Lord indeed.

LL Bean boots are hand-made in Maine with US sourced materials and they are practically bulletproof. I recommend them to anybody out there who wants a solid new pair of boots.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: JAYSLOL on March 13, 2019, 09:39:21 PM
The ad would have been a lot better worded like this "Your boots shouldn't retire before you do"

You should totally pitch that to them.

It would totally sell more boots.  A positive association works a lot harder to get people buy an idea or product than a negative one.  It's why Nike's slogan is "Just do it" and not "Don't bother, you'll never succeed", and why McDonalds slogan is "I'm lovin it" and not "Becasue you were never going to eat healthy anyways".

+1
Made me laugh out loud on the train ...

And that's why I get out of bed in the morning.  Oh, and I could go on - how about that's why De Beers slogan is "A Diamond is Forever" and not "Dude, you got like a 50/50 shot", and why Kellogg's Frosties slogan is "They're G-R-R-R-EAT!" and not "They're S-S-Sugar!"
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: rothwem on March 14, 2019, 02:40:14 PM
Feeling pretty good about having bought LL Bean boots right now. Good Lord.

...And I'm feeling good about my 36 year old, made in the USA Rocky work/hunting boots.  One of my most prized possessions.  Good Lord indeed.

LL Bean boots are hand-made in Maine with US sourced materials and they are practically bulletproof. I recommend them to anybody out there who wants a solid new pair of boots.

LLBean boots are terrible, the soles on mine fell apart after just 16 years!

Totally kidding.  Bought a second pair of the exact same boots (LLBean Cresta Hikers) the week after I had my sole failure. 



Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: Holyoak on March 14, 2019, 02:51:57 PM
Nice to hear about these LL Bean boots.  I had a friend who was a professional hunting guide doing work in CO and AK, and he told me his favorite boot hands down were German made Meindl.  Never have owned a pair but surely trust his opinion.  I wonder if these Meindl boots are still as well made as he stated?
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: WhiteTrashCash on March 14, 2019, 08:00:31 PM
Feeling pretty good about having bought LL Bean boots right now. Good Lord.

...And I'm feeling good about my 36 year old, made in the USA Rocky work/hunting boots.  One of my most prized possessions.  Good Lord indeed.

LL Bean boots are hand-made in Maine with US sourced materials and they are practically bulletproof. I recommend them to anybody out there who wants a solid new pair of boots.

LLBean boots are terrible, the soles on mine fell apart after just 16 years!

Totally kidding.  Bought a second pair of the exact same boots (LLBean Cresta Hikers) the week after I had my sole failure.

You should have shipped it back to them for repairs instead of buying a new pair of them. LL Bean boot repairs are very reasonably priced.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: rothwem on March 15, 2019, 05:59:03 AM
Feeling pretty good about having bought LL Bean boots right now. Good Lord.

...And I'm feeling good about my 36 year old, made in the USA Rocky work/hunting boots.  One of my most prized possessions.  Good Lord indeed.

LL Bean boots are hand-made in Maine with US sourced materials and they are practically bulletproof. I recommend them to anybody out there who wants a solid new pair of boots.

LLBean boots are terrible, the soles on mine fell apart after just 16 years!

Totally kidding.  Bought a second pair of the exact same boots (LLBean Cresta Hikers) the week after I had my sole failure.

You should have shipped it back to them for repairs instead of buying a new pair of them. LL Bean boot repairs are very reasonably priced.

I didn't think it was possible on the non-stitched style sole?  I wish I had done this, they took forever to break in and the new ones aren't broken in yet. 
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: LiveLean on March 16, 2019, 02:30:04 PM
I own timberland - great investment - but would never buy such overpriced, uncomfortable Timberland boots or shoes.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: Just Joe on March 16, 2019, 09:28:53 PM
Anyone have a shoe store that sells returns or lightly USED shoes in their city? We have one. I priced a pair of Timberland boots yesterday for $40. They looked like they had been used to walk across the room once and nothing more. I bought a pair myself years ago. Still in fine condition today.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: Holyoak on March 17, 2019, 07:35:15 AM
Anyone have a shoe store that sells returns or lightly USED shoes in their city? We have one. I priced a pair of Timberland boots yesterday for $40. They looked like they had been used to walk across the room once and nothing more. I bought a pair myself years ago. Still in fine condition today.

Lucky you...  Salvation Army/Goodwill in my neck of the woods is as close as I can get, and it's mostly a lot of junk footwear...  Not to mention 13.5/14 EE/EEEE is a real bitch to find anywhere.   What you have sounds great.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: Just Joe on March 17, 2019, 12:21:11 PM
Yeah, I have wide feet and its hard to find anything in my size these days. Length? Check. Width? Nope. if I had size ten regular, I'd be in high cotton.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: WhiteTrashCash on March 17, 2019, 01:17:06 PM
Anyone have a shoe store that sells returns or lightly USED shoes in their city? We have one. I priced a pair of Timberland boots yesterday for $40. They looked like they had been used to walk across the room once and nothing more. I bought a pair myself years ago. Still in fine condition today.

I have a pair of Timberland boots that I bought on clearance at TJ Maxx 11 years ago for $40 and they are still going strong. They are green, so they are perfect for St. Patrick's Day.
Title: Re: You'll never retire...
Post by: Holyoak on March 17, 2019, 04:00:51 PM
Yeah, I have wide feet and its hard to find anything in my size these days. Length? Check. Width? Nope. if I had size ten regular, I'd be in high cotton.

I feel ya Bro, indeed...  And it does not help with all of the crazy sizing variance either.  One makers 13 EE fits me like another's 14EEE...  Even within the same maker the sizes do not run true, or like NB their sizing IMO and experience is running smaller anymore.  I can't even get a break on clothing...  Ever see a well fitted 52 jacket with 34/36 waist trousers on the rack? 

Alterations are expensive and it's hard to find competent folks to do a good job.  I had a military class A and dress blue jacket butchered by supposed "top flight" seamstresses...  Couldn't even sew on the commissioned officers cuff stripes right. Real fun too looking for XX to XXL gloves.  Have a brother who wears a 12D, 44 regular jacket, and easy to fit trousers.  *sigh*.