And in a shocking turn of events the sister in question is having flooding problems in her basement and may need to have her sewer lines replaced. It totally sucks, and I feel bad for her, but she is bitching about money now and doesn't have any money set aside for the repair. Or any money set aside for anything, because setting money aside is something my family seems incapable of doing.
It is frustrating to watch them waste money knowing they could and should be more responsible with it.
I frequently have mixed feelings when someone I know hits a large unanticipated expense and can’t pay for it. It sucks and I want to empathize, but most of the time they have been living on the financial edge for years and spending as if there would be no bad days. Often these are my aquiantances that tease me for being a ‘cheap-ass’ who can afford to own a fancier car/house/boat/whatever.
This is pretty much exactly how I feel.
To take it one level higher these people have also asked me for money to help pay for their kids travel sports and their kids school trip to NYC. I am sympathetic to a fundraiser for poor kids that would not be able to go. However, when the parents are making 200K to 300K/year combined, the fundraiser rubs me the wrong way.
They ask for money like the parents approach you and say “hey can you spare some cash?” Or they participate in fundraisers where the kids are theoretically supposed to be selling something to raise money? Two very different things. The income level of the parents has no relevance on the latter, IMO.
At the end of the day, it's an opinion. I don't think there can be a right or wrong. However, I am surprised that you don't think the income level of the parents is an important variable.
In my personal example, I have experienced fund raisers for kids on food stamps and fundraisers for kids who have parents that make 800K/year combined.
When I was a kid, the local little league would do fundraisers so poor kids that couldn't afford the $100 registration fee could still participate. I think they also gave out gloves, but not bats. These kids are poor. They are on food stamps.
I have a friend that emailed me a link to wire him money for his kids softball travel team. He called it a fundraiser. The travel team is around $5000. It costs money to rent fields, in-door practice facilities, hotels, airline tickets and gas.
When someone is directly asking you for money, I think there is a fundamental difference between an in-house league that costs $100 and a travel team that costs $5000.
My wife's sister verbally asked us to donate to her step-daughters trip to NYC. She asked us to log onto to the school website, enter her step-daughters name and electronically deposit money. This was also called a fundraiser. The 8th grader has two sets of parents because her parents are divorced. Within her two sets of parents, they probably make around 800K/year combined.
I personally believe that it's more appropriate to have a fundraiser for a kid that is on food stamps with parents that work minimum wage jobs and are on food stamps vs. another kid who has two sets of parents that make a combined income of 800K/year. However, in the end, it's just my opinion.
