Author Topic: Too damn cheap to get a haircut  (Read 5882 times)

TheGrimSqueaker

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Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« on: March 29, 2018, 07:53:25 PM »
It's time for me to get professional help.  But I can definitely see the comedy in this situation.

My hair is long.  Really long.  As in, down past my knees long.  I trim it myself twice a year whether it needs it or not because I don't use hair salons. I refuse to pay double for the same haircut as the dude next to me. Mostly I have my hair in a knotted braid or in some Star Trek inspired chignon.  It gets in the way playing fight sports and caution is needed when using the toilet. I've even stepped on my own braid a few times and I'd look like Howard Hughes if I weren't clipping my nails for judo and similar purposes.  My hair got this badly out of control once before about fifteen years ago and I chopped it off. But while DIY'ing without my contact lenses in I kind of made a mistake with a set of clippers. Once I evened everything up I'd basically shaved my head.

So, it's probably not wise for me to be let loose around a set of clippers again. I'm therefore "seeking professional help" and getting someone who knows what the fuck they're doing to cut my hair. But, tightwad that I am, I refuse to pay double for the privilege. So I found a way not to have to pay at all.

I've found a charity called St. Baldricks (not a real saint) that raises money for children's cancer research by shaving people's heads.  The charity meets my standards for good management and sustainability, so I signed up. On May 5th I'm going as bald as a cue-ball and raising money for pediatric oncology research in the process.  I'm taking great delight in soliciting everyone who ever hit me up on social media.

This is what we call a perfect alignment of interests.

stylesjl

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #1 on: March 30, 2018, 01:30:45 AM »
I've even stepped on my own braid a few times
That's about the threshold of "You need a haircut".

Mesmoiselle

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #2 on: March 30, 2018, 01:58:01 AM »
Snort. I approve.

I let my sister trim my hair twice a year.  Once when my hair reached my butt, I let her whack 10+ inches. No siblings or friends to do for you?

This works too, but for the future I mean.

squirrel

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #3 on: March 30, 2018, 04:21:51 AM »
Brilliant plan!

Do they then donate your hair as well?  We have the Little Princess trust who make real hair wigs for kids who need them.

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #4 on: March 30, 2018, 07:43:41 AM »
St. Baldrick's is an awesome charity! My niece has done this every year for the past five years, it's a great way to raise money for kids with cancer and yes, they do donate the hair. Squeaks, as always you crack me up...  ;)

UnleashHell

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #5 on: March 30, 2018, 08:24:14 AM »
St Baldrick.

I immediately thought of Tony Robinson. Turns out he's a patron of the charity!! That has to be a good sign.

(see Blackadder for reference)

TheGrimSqueaker

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #6 on: March 30, 2018, 06:31:55 PM »
Brilliant plan!

Do they then donate your hair as well?  We have the Little Princess trust who make real hair wigs for kids who need them.

They provide address information for at least half a dozen charities that accept hair. I've got too much gray to donate to the kiddo charities, but Pantene is running a charity for adult wigs so I expect to send it there.

TheGrimSqueaker

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #7 on: March 30, 2018, 06:33:42 PM »
Snort. I approve.

I let my sister trim my hair twice a year.  Once when my hair reached my butt, I let her whack 10+ inches. No siblings or friends to do for you?

This works too, but for the future I mean.

I plan to make this the way of things in the future. My only sibling lives in a different country and we're barely on speaking terms since the FBI incident. I wouldn't trust him behind my back with a pair of scissors, frankly. I could probably impose on a friend but never got around to it.

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #8 on: March 31, 2018, 05:08:31 PM »
Snort. I approve.

I let my sister trim my hair twice a year.  Once when my hair reached my butt, I let her whack 10+ inches. No siblings or friends to do for you?

This works too, but for the future I mean.

I plan to make this the way of things in the future. My only sibling lives in a different country and we're barely on speaking terms since the FBI incident. I wouldn't trust him behind my back with a pair of scissors, frankly. I could probably impose on a friend but never got around to it.

The FBI incident...? Please elaborate.

Paul der Krake

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #9 on: March 31, 2018, 05:17:23 PM »
We're going to need some proof on this one. Before/after pictures will do.

Just Joe

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #10 on: April 02, 2018, 09:01:07 AM »
That's how you do it - the annual or bi-annual haircut. Saves all sorts of money at the barbershop aka $20.

Seradoc

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #11 on: April 02, 2018, 10:39:45 AM »
10th year and 11th shave for St Baldrick's on Saturday here.  Probably raised about $7500 over the years, but I donate about $200 for the annual haircut.

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #12 on: April 02, 2018, 11:01:51 AM »
Your head is going to feel like it's about to float away - it's a hilarious feeling!

TheGrimSqueaker

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #13 on: April 04, 2018, 07:57:34 AM »
10th year and 11th shave for St Baldrick's on Saturday here.  Probably raised about $7500 over the years, but I donate about $200 for the annual haircut.

Ah, a Knight of the Bald Table!

Yeah, I'm kind of ending up doing the donation thing too. I'm a bit of a sucker for charitable ventures.

The way St. Baldrick's scores on some of the online charity ranking sites doesn't reflect its overall performance or viability. The problem with those sites is that they use the same metrics and criteria to assess *all* charities, so they treat a homeless shelter or a disaster relief organization the same as a fundraising charity and expect their asset/liability ratio to be similar. St. Baldrick's gets dinged for having a high debt to asset ratio, when in reality both their debts and their retained assets are obscenely low compared to their annual cash flow. They don't retain much in the way of assets because they exist solely as a money-raising organization, but they do have some infrastructure so that they can competently review grant applications and fund the best ones. Such debt as they have could be obliterated just out of cash flow if they wished. Like most fundraising charities they also have an incredibly scalable business model: all they need to do to adjust to a funding shortfall should it occur is fund fewer grants until the cash flow balanced out.

My official "before" picture is at this link:
https://www.stbaldricks.org/participants/mypage/980393/2018

Yes, my hair really is that long. You can hardly see my arm holding it up because the hair is hanging down in front. I can do all the hairstyles from Star Wars. And it's getting the chop.

TheGrimSqueaker

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #14 on: April 04, 2018, 08:16:09 AM »
Snort. I approve.

I let my sister trim my hair twice a year.  Once when my hair reached my butt, I let her whack 10+ inches. No siblings or friends to do for you?

This works too, but for the future I mean.

I plan to make this the way of things in the future. My only sibling lives in a different country and we're barely on speaking terms since the FBI incident. I wouldn't trust him behind my back with a pair of scissors, frankly. I could probably impose on a friend but never got around to it.

The FBI incident...? Please elaborate.

I have an international family: Dad and I are Yankistani and Mom and my younger bro are Canuckistani. The family lives in Canuckistan but I moved to Yankistan almost 20 years ago for work. Now, where I work there are some E-mail filters. My sibling went on one of his customary drunken rants and E-mailed what amounts to a death threat. It hit the filters and got automatically escalated, so next thing I know there's this FBI chick in my office asking me why I'm getting a death threat from outside the country. The conversation, condensed and paraphrased a bit, went like this.

FBI: Is your brother capable of following through on his threat?

Me: Well, he's an outstanding shot, and he does hit what he aims at.

FBI: Has he threatened you in person or actually attacked you with a weapon before?

Me: Yes, on more than one occasion. It's normal behavior for him, and one of the reasons why I live in a different country.

FBI: Does he have access to guns?

Me: Yes, our parents have bought him several. He lost his FAC (license to own firearms) because of some drunken stupidity a few years ago so they kept them for him a while.

FBI: Does he have access to a vehicle?

Me: Yes, my folks have bought him one to replace the one he wrecked.

FBI: Does he know your address and have the money to visit you?

Me: My folks would provide it if he asked. I've already asked them to stop letting him use their computer to harass me at work, but they say he's using the computer for work so they don't believe they have the right to deprive him of it.

FBI: So why haven't you reported it to the authorities?

Me: Jurisdiction.

FBI: And how is it that you're not concerned?

Me: Physical distance. To get to me would require basic physical courage, planning, and organization skills. He doesn't have much of that even when sober.

FBI: So you're staking your life on the fact your brother is a coward and a screw-up with no logistics skills?

Me: It's been a good bet so far.

Now, in the discussion above I'm doing what's called "magical thinking", assuming things will continue the way they have done in the past. It's fallacious reasoning. I basically lost the argument with the FBI officer, which is among the more humiliating things that have ever happened to me. I don't forgive that. I'm also not a gigantic fan of the death threats, which were not of the casual "I'm gonna kill you" kidding around variety. I get that my bro has a diagnosed mental illness on top of the alcoholism and that he needs this, that, and the other thing from my parents, and they enable him to the point where I long ago decided that they like and approve of his conduct, and want more of it.

CindyBS

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #15 on: April 04, 2018, 09:54:07 AM »
Mom to a kid with cancer here.

Childhood cancer research is so underfunded in the US it is positively amoral.  Big Pharma invests almost nothing and only about 4% of federal government cancer research dollars goes towards childhood cancer.   Cancer is the number one disease killer of children (excluding things like accidents and prematurity). 

All that being said, St. Baldricks is a fantastic group and raises money to a very needed cause.   It is a widely respected charity in the childhood cancer community. 

I highly recommend anyone donate.  Kudos to all the head shavers.  I've raised money for them as a volunteer, but am still not brave enough for the shave. 

StockBeard

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #16 on: April 10, 2018, 02:34:21 AM »
I sent a few bucks through your profile. Don't know if people would take it the wrong way, but I'd almost suggest you edit your first post to put your profile link there. It took me some long reading of the thread before realizing people can donate for the cause :)

TheGrimSqueaker

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #17 on: April 10, 2018, 08:39:27 AM »
I sent a few bucks through your profile. Don't know if people would take it the wrong way, but I'd almost suggest you edit your first post to put your profile link there. It took me some long reading of the thread before realizing people can donate for the cause :)

Thank you very much! Your donation will help the fight against childhood cancer.

I believe that putting the link in the initial post would violate the forum terms of service. I did cough up the link when someone asked for a "before and after" picture but even that may be crossing the line.

There's another thread about online solicitation and GoFundMe in particular. I've been following it with interest. The consensus seems to be that unwanted solicitation is *always* obnoxious no matter what it's for. While I like to believe that raising money for pediatric cancer through a registered 501(c)(3) is different from, say, raising money for a vacation or cosmetic surgery, to a person on the receiving end of the "gimme" the experience is the same. The slippery slope phenomenon is also in effect.

Kimera757

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #18 on: April 14, 2018, 05:10:25 PM »
I've even stepped on my own braid a few times
That's about the threshold of "You need a haircut".

No...

IIt gets in the way playing fight sports and caution is needed when using the toilet.

That's the real threshold.

meghan88

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #19 on: April 14, 2018, 05:38:56 PM »
Snort. I approve.

I let my sister trim my hair twice a year.  Once when my hair reached my butt, I let her whack 10+ inches. No siblings or friends to do for you?

This works too, but for the future I mean.

I plan to make this the way of things in the future. My only sibling lives in a different country and we're barely on speaking terms since the FBI incident. I wouldn't trust him behind my back with a pair of scissors, frankly. I could probably impose on a friend but never got around to it.

The FBI incident...? Please elaborate.

I have an international family: Dad and I are Yankistani and Mom and my younger bro are Canuckistani. The family lives in Canuckistan but I moved to Yankistan almost 20 years ago for work. Now, where I work there are some E-mail filters. My sibling went on one of his customary drunken rants and E-mailed what amounts to a death threat. It hit the filters and got automatically escalated, so next thing I know there's this FBI chick in my office asking me why I'm getting a death threat from outside the country. The conversation, condensed and paraphrased a bit, went like this.

FBI: Is your brother capable of following through on his threat?

Me: Well, he's an outstanding shot, and he does hit what he aims at.

FBI: Has he threatened you in person or actually attacked you with a weapon before?

Me: Yes, on more than one occasion. It's normal behavior for him, and one of the reasons why I live in a different country.

FBI: Does he have access to guns?

Me: Yes, our parents have bought him several. He lost his FAC (license to own firearms) because of some drunken stupidity a few years ago so they kept them for him a while.

FBI: Does he have access to a vehicle?

Me: Yes, my folks have bought him one to replace the one he wrecked.

FBI: Does he know your address and have the money to visit you?

Me: My folks would provide it if he asked. I've already asked them to stop letting him use their computer to harass me at work, but they say he's using the computer for work so they don't believe they have the right to deprive him of it.

FBI: So why haven't you reported it to the authorities?

Me: Jurisdiction.

FBI: And how is it that you're not concerned?

Me: Physical distance. To get to me would require basic physical courage, planning, and organization skills. He doesn't have much of that even when sober.

FBI: So you're staking your life on the fact your brother is a coward and a screw-up with no logistics skills?

Me: It's been a good bet so far.

Now, in the discussion above I'm doing what's called "magical thinking", assuming things will continue the way they have done in the past. It's fallacious reasoning. I basically lost the argument with the FBI officer, which is among the more humiliating things that have ever happened to me. I don't forgive that. I'm also not a gigantic fan of the death threats, which were not of the casual "I'm gonna kill you" kidding around variety. I get that my bro has a diagnosed mental illness on top of the alcoholism and that he needs this, that, and the other thing from my parents, and they enable him to the point where I long ago decided that they like and approve of his conduct, and want more of it.

Ho-lee ... WOW.  That is raw.  So much to reflect upon in your post, not the least being "Canuckistan" and "Yankistan".  Yes, we are there, aren't we.  Having thoughts that microchip implants for humans will soon be a thing.

On another note, you have amazing hair, and good on you for doing what you are doing.

I also thought about Baldrick from Blackadder when I first read the name.  Glad to see he's a patron.

okits

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #20 on: May 04, 2018, 02:00:43 PM »
The big event is tomorrow!

I can do all the hairstyles from Star Wars.

<squeal>  Do you have a favourite?  Any Queen Amidala in there? 

TheGrimSqueaker

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #21 on: May 04, 2018, 03:24:33 PM »
The big event is tomorrow!

I can do all the hairstyles from Star Wars.

<squeal>  Do you have a favourite?  Any Queen Amidala in there?

I'm considering doing Princess Leia from "A New Hope" this evening by way of farewell but I have a headache so I may not. I didn't enjoy my Queen Amidala attempt. Too much mass is out too far away from the neck. It freaking hurts after a few minutes, and then if you turn your head too quickly you bop yourself in the eye.

Edited to add: I ought to do this again for 5 November.
« Last Edit: May 04, 2018, 03:26:10 PM by TheGrimSqueaker »

CheapskateWife

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #22 on: May 04, 2018, 03:46:52 PM »
I absolutely love that you are doing this!  You, madam, have much courage!

okits

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #23 on: May 06, 2018, 08:51:14 PM »
How was it, TGS?

mm1970

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #24 on: May 07, 2018, 09:46:01 AM »
Alright we are ready for the details!

That FBI thing was funny.

I don't get my hair cut often either.  2x a year.  $25 each time.

TheGrimSqueaker

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #25 on: May 09, 2018, 09:03:38 PM »
My entire head is now sunburned and my face is peeling. But I feel free and happy. Really I was tired of having hair. I may just embrace this as a lifestyle choice if I can avoid lobsterdom.

Here is an "after" shot with my far more photogenic Venomous Spaz Beast, who did not shave.

https://www.stbaldricks.org/participants/mypage/980393/2018


okits

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #26 on: May 09, 2018, 09:09:56 PM »
Congratulations!!  Now sunscreen and hats!  I am on the lookout for a hat with a 4" all-around brim, as apparently less is not enough (I think my current hat is only 2.5-3").

VSB is cute. 🐶

Just Joe

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Re: Too damn cheap to get a haircut
« Reply #27 on: May 10, 2018, 08:28:28 AM »
Congratulations!!  Now sunscreen and hats!  I am on the lookout for a hat with a 4" all-around brim, as apparently less is not enough (I think my current hat is only 2.5-3").

VSB is cute. 🐶

You need to go to the Amish store and buy a straw hat...