Author Topic: This blog entry... oh boy...  (Read 35409 times)

Threnn

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This blog entry... oh boy...
« on: July 03, 2015, 05:59:36 AM »
http://stephaniesynclair.com/8-investments-that-changed-me-as-a-woman/

It really is taking a massive dump on mustachianism. I think you could get a lot of that fullfillment through your own work, and a majority is just a massive waste of money. Just wow.

HappierAtHome

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #1 on: July 03, 2015, 06:11:43 AM »
I don't think she understands the term "investment".

crispy

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #2 on: July 03, 2015, 07:13:20 AM »
The comments were just as bad until the one from Kendra Nelson. She was right on!

The Accidental Mustachian

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #3 on: July 03, 2015, 08:11:52 AM »
I'm fairly confident that she will be FIREd with that ethos...........

Erica/NWEdible

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #4 on: July 03, 2015, 09:04:00 AM »
From the comments section:
Quote
Love this. I was just talking to a good friend today about having someone grocery shop for me and clean my house. One mentor once said that when we live our dreams and treat ourselves as queens we give other women “permission” to do the same. This is how we need to show up in the world and acknowledge that this is what we deserve. No more being a mule. Lol
This is very interesting to me. As someone in the urban homesteading community, we tend to take the opposite view: when you outsource the irritating domestic stuff in your life, you are typically supporting industries where other workers are taken advantage of. I mean, at the end of the day, SOMEONE has to do the house cleaning and the shopping and the baby-watching and the food growing. The commenter's view that she can outsource "being a mule" to some other person (99% likelihood this person is a woman lower on the socio-economic ladder than herself) and that this is "giving other women permission to be queens" seems to lack self awareness. It's like the monied NY women who hire nannies who in turn leave their own children motherless in their home country to do that job. That's supposed to be a "womyn positive" or empowering exchange? I don't get it. Just seems like more grasping at status symbols to me.

(Fair disclosure: we have had regular housecleaning service in the past. It is pretty awesome to have the whole house clean all at the same time. But it made me uncomfortable, and it was too much money. So we don't do that anymore.)

Elderwood17

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #5 on: July 03, 2015, 09:21:09 AM »
Wow.  Take a bunch of expenses, ridiculous expenses at that, and call them investments??!!!

I am so worthy of flying first class and having massages twice a week.  Fine, feel that way, but don't call them investments.

justajane

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #6 on: July 03, 2015, 10:16:50 AM »
From the comments section:
Quote
Love this. I was just talking to a good friend today about having someone grocery shop for me and clean my house. One mentor once said that when we live our dreams and treat ourselves as queens we give other women “permission” to do the same. This is how we need to show up in the world and acknowledge that this is what we deserve. No more being a mule. Lol
This is very interesting to me. As someone in the urban homesteading community, we tend to take the opposite view: when you outsource the irritating domestic stuff in your life, you are typically supporting industries where other workers are taken advantage of. I mean, at the end of the day, SOMEONE has to do the house cleaning and the shopping and the baby-watching and the food growing. The commenter's view that she can outsource "being a mule" to some other person (99% likelihood this person is a woman lower on the socio-economic ladder than herself) and that this is "giving other women permission to be queens" seems to lack self awareness. It's like the monied NY women who hire nannies who in turn leave their own children motherless in their home country to do that job. That's supposed to be a "womyn positive" or empowering exchange? I don't get it. Just seems like more grasping at status symbols to me.

Very insightful thoughts. I also struggle with outsourcing housecleaning because I think, "Who am I to think that I am above scrubbing my own toilets?" I know that public places need janitors and such, but I struggle with it in my own home, even though we technically can afford it.

I really didn't like the one time that I got a pedicure. It was weird, and cleaning another person's feet is presented in the Bible as the ultimate expression of humility for a reason - it's kinda humiliating.

I especially didn't care for how the blog writer brought gender into it. I just don't think in those terms, and I think it perpetuate gender stereotypes and the idea that women should treat themselves, because......really why? What makes us so special? You don't hear the same rhetoric around men.

The blog post also reminded me of a classic skit on Parks and Recreation - "Treat Yo Self"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OP3xf6BFEIo

justajane

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #7 on: July 03, 2015, 10:20:38 AM »
In her response to the awesome Kendra, the blogger says that she only works 4 hours a week. The motivational lifestyle guru thing must be very lucrative! I guess there are a lot of suckers out there who buy into it.

LeRainDrop

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #8 on: July 03, 2015, 10:21:52 AM »
I am perplexed -- how has this lady been finding success?  Her writing is sloppy.  She doesn't share her credentials.  The whole theory of her advice seems unfounded.

slugline

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #9 on: July 03, 2015, 10:34:41 AM »
If she's only working 4 hours a week, isn't she on the edge of being practically FIREd already? Hmmmmmm

Hadilly

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #10 on: July 03, 2015, 10:37:34 AM »
The subtext is that she is a proponent of the prosperity/abundance mindset, which was set out in "The Secret". From what I understand, you assume the universe will give you what you want if you ask for it and have faith (see her trip to Italy). This is about the extent of my understanding, but I think it is a dangerous and stupid approach, potentially really harmful to the extent it encourages magical thinking.

Kitsune

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #11 on: July 03, 2015, 10:45:52 AM »
From the comments section:
Quote
Love this. I was just talking to a good friend today about having someone grocery shop for me and clean my house. One mentor once said that when we live our dreams and treat ourselves as queens we give other women “permission” to do the same. This is how we need to show up in the world and acknowledge that this is what we deserve. No more being a mule. Lol
This is very interesting to me. As someone in the urban homesteading community, we tend to take the opposite view: when you outsource the irritating domestic stuff in your life, you are typically supporting industries where other workers are taken advantage of. I mean, at the end of the day, SOMEONE has to do the house cleaning and the shopping and the baby-watching and the food growing. The commenter's view that she can outsource "being a mule" to some other person (99% likelihood this person is a woman lower on the socio-economic ladder than herself) and that this is "giving other women permission to be queens" seems to lack self awareness. It's like the monied NY women who hire nannies who in turn leave their own children motherless in their home country to do that job. That's supposed to be a "womyn positive" or empowering exchange? I don't get it. Just seems like more grasping at status symbols to me.

Very insightful thoughts. I also struggle with outsourcing housecleaning because I think, "Who am I to think that I am above scrubbing my own toilets?" I know that public places need janitors and such, but I struggle with it in my own home, even though we technically can afford it.

I really didn't like the one time that I got a pedicure. It was weird, and cleaning another person's feet is presented in the Bible as the ultimate expression of humility for a reason - it's kinda humiliating.

I especially didn't care for how the blog writer brought gender into it. I just don't think in those terms, and I think it perpetuate gender stereotypes and the idea that women should treat themselves, because......really why? What makes us so special? You don't hear the same rhetoric around men.

The blog post also reminded me of a classic skit on Parks and Recreation - "Treat Yo Self"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OP3xf6BFEIo

RE: your comment: around here, a cleaning person (usually a woman) tends to charge 15-20$/hour (under the table, so no income taxes on that...). So... it might not be the most glamorous job, but, honestly, at that pay, if I needed money, I'd definitely prefer cleaning someone's house to working as a barista for half that amount. Your point about the gender balance stands, though - what is it about being a woman that makes a massage so earned? I like them as much as the next woman, but, y'know, so does my husband...

RE: the blog post: UGH to the writing style, the content, and the general "think positive about money and money will come to you!" attitude. In my experience, money comes to you after a bit more doing than visualizing. (That said, if you're busty, good bras are absolutely worth the money. They last longer, especially if you baby them, and they are so. much. more. comfortable.)

Erica/NWEdible

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #12 on: July 03, 2015, 11:11:57 AM »
RE: your comment: around here, a cleaning person (usually a woman) tends to charge 15-20$/hour (under the table, so no income taxes on that...). So... it might not be the most glamorous job, but, honestly, at that pay, if I needed money, I'd definitely prefer cleaning someone's house to working as a barista for half that amount. Your point about the gender balance stands, though - what is it about being a woman that makes a massage so earned? I like them as much as the next woman, but, y'know, so does my husband...
For sure, as a job house cleaning can be fairly lucrative, particularly compared to the training and capital investment needed. And in that sense, if someone (male or female) wants to set up a business as an home cleaning entrepreneur that's great.  It's apparently one of the fastest growing industries in the US, and in general my feeling is if two consenting adults want to enter into a business relationship that doesn't harm anyone else, it's really not my business.

But in general the "I'm a liberated woman because I can pay other women to do do traditionally female grunt work" is an argument that I find really hollow. Far more progressive to me would be, "I share the housework load with my husband equally." Or, even, "Look, I make $250 an hour. It doesn't make financial sense for me to spend 4 hours cleaning my house when I could be billing in those hours." To me, that's a more honest assessment. It's not, "I'm too good to clean my house because I'm a special snowflake" - it's a simple cost/benefit analysis.

And I'll admit that the "I'm a special snowflake/I deserve it" mentality just kinda bugs me, and then throw on a veneer of "I'm a special snowflake/I deserve it BECAUSE I'm XYZ type of woman" feels anti-progress to me, like it further undermines any sense of value in things like homecare and childcare that are traditionally the realm of women. I'll admit I'm probably over-thinking this. :)

neophyte

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #13 on: July 03, 2015, 12:11:11 PM »
Egads!  I read #1 and found myself agreeing that yes, I think good bras are something that's worth spending gobs of money on. On any given day my bra probably cost as much or more than everything else I'm wearing combined. I started wondering how bad this could be -- didn't have to wonder long!

 
From the comments section:
Quote
Love this. I was just talking to a good friend today about having someone grocery shop for me and clean my house. One mentor once said that when we live our dreams and treat ourselves as queens we give other women “permission” to do the same. This is how we need to show up in the world and acknowledge that this is what we deserve. No more being a mule. Lol
This is very interesting to me. As someone in the urban homesteading community, we tend to take the opposite view: when you outsource the irritating domestic stuff in your life, you are typically supporting industries where other workers are taken advantage of. I mean, at the end of the day, SOMEONE has to do the house cleaning and the shopping and the baby-watching and the food growing. The commenter's view that she can outsource "being a mule" to some other person (99% likelihood this person is a woman lower on the socio-economic ladder than herself) and that this is "giving other women permission to be queens" seems to lack self awareness.

THIS!  The use of the term 'mule' is so degrading!

Kaspian

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #14 on: July 03, 2015, 12:14:51 PM »
Oh, wow--I heavily dislike when people use the word "investment" as a replacement for "spending".  Following that train of thought to its conclusion, every single thing you spend money on can be justified as "investment".  If it makes you happy--investment.  If you learn something--investment.  If you eat it--investment. 
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merula

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #15 on: July 03, 2015, 12:22:20 PM »
That's the kind of blog post that gives copy editors job security.

But obviously that's far less offensive than the attitude "I'm valuable as a woman because I don't know what investment means and I need other people to do everything for me".

Cpa Cat

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #16 on: July 03, 2015, 12:43:49 PM »
I admit, I was confused about what kind of Money Coach ($3,000 price tag) ends your session by telling you to start flying First Class. How do I get people to pay me  to tell them to buy stuff?

Unless the conversation went along the lines of, "Lady, you have $10,000,000 in the bank, wtf are you doing flying coach?" Then I'm on board. First Class and cut flowers all the way.

As for the house-cleaning debate: I think it's kind of insulting to call that job "degrading" or "exploitative." Imagine you're a typical house-cleaner. You have little education and few skills. You make a fair wage, your clients don't abuse you, you're paid on time. You have a flexible schedule that allows you to work around child care or sick family members. People appreciate what you do for them. Your clients are busy or sick or disabled and you come in and make their life easier.

And then one day someone comes along and says, "I'm firing you, because your job degrades you and exploits you." Did that person really just improve your life? Or was that judgment of your job as something to be ashamed of the worst thing about being a house-cleaner?

I'm not saying we should all hire maids for the good of humanity, or anything. But a cleaning-service is only exploitative and degrading if you treat that person poorly. Otherwise, it's a job like any other.

EscapeVelocity2020

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #17 on: July 03, 2015, 12:52:43 PM »
Commenting before having read the linked article.  Flew first class between swank cities, and the diversity of people is pretty cool.  Especially since alcohol is free.  Holy crap, I just realized that I have solved international world peace a few dozen times!  So sure, it is a heady experience, but very expensive (if you pay for it, all of mine were either comps or reward mile upgrades) and ultimately the experience is very temporary...   
« Last Edit: July 07, 2015, 07:37:21 AM by EscapeVelocity2020 »
Transitioning to FIRE'd albeit somewhat cautiously...

bo_knows

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #18 on: July 03, 2015, 12:58:23 PM »
All face-punching aside, as a dude who has chronically tight muscles and always has bits that hurt, I would kill a man to have 2x massages a week.
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mm1970

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #19 on: July 03, 2015, 12:59:22 PM »
I can understand, for sure, the bra thing, and the mentor thing.

But the rest?

Hm...somehow I cannot see the comment though?  Does anyone have the Kendra comment mentioned?

TN_Steve

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #20 on: July 03, 2015, 01:09:26 PM »
I can understand, for sure, the bra thing, and the mentor thing.

But the rest?

Hm...somehow I cannot see the comment though?  Does anyone have the Kendra comment mentioned?

It's about the fifth one down...

Quote
Kendra Nelson · Manager at Canton Vision
Is this the bullshit black women are striving for these days.. Wow. You know what's life changing, Actual achievements, growth, things money can not buy. But keep hustling those 50hr work weeks for some DVF.

frugledoc

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #21 on: July 03, 2015, 01:58:24 PM »
I don't want to judge but I think I would probably hate the writer if I met her in real life.

People like her make normal people feel bad about their lives. 

I'll be honest, if I ever have enough money that money is not at all important any more I will probably do most of these things but I won't brag about them in a blog and call them investments.

LeRainDrop

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #22 on: July 03, 2015, 01:58:52 PM »
As for the house-cleaning debate: I think it's kind of insulting to call that job "degrading" or "exploitative." Imagine you're a typical house-cleaner. You have little education and few skills. You make a fair wage, your clients don't abuse you, you're paid on time. You have a flexible schedule that allows you to work around child care or sick family members. People appreciate what you do for them. Your clients are busy or sick or disabled and you come in and make their life easier.

And then one day someone comes along and says, "I'm firing you, because your job degrades you and exploits you." Did that person really just improve your life? Or was that judgment of your job as something to be ashamed of the worst thing about being a house-cleaner?

I'm not saying we should all hire maids for the good of humanity, or anything. But a cleaning-service is only exploitative and degrading if you treat that person poorly. Otherwise, it's a job like any other.
You summed up my thoughts on this service perfectly.

And I'll admit that the "I'm a special snowflake/I deserve it" mentality just kinda bugs me, and then throw on a veneer of "I'm a special snowflake/I deserve it BECAUSE I'm XYZ type of woman" feels anti-progress to me, like it further undermines any sense of value in things like homecare and childcare that are traditionally the realm of women. I'll admit I'm probably over-thinking this. :)
I also agree with this.  It really bothers me when some people think that they are inherently superior to others.

Erica/NWEdible

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #23 on: July 03, 2015, 02:19:30 PM »
As for the house-cleaning debate: I think it's kind of insulting to call that job "degrading" or "exploitative." Imagine you're a typical house-cleaner. You have little education and few skills. You make a fair wage, your clients don't abuse you, you're paid on time. You have a flexible schedule that allows you to work around child care or sick family members. People appreciate what you do for them. Your clients are busy or sick or disabled and you come in and make their life easier.

And then one day someone comes along and says, "I'm firing you, because your job degrades you and exploits you." Did that person really just improve your life? Or was that judgment of your job as something to be ashamed of the worst thing about being a house-cleaner?
I'm not sure there's a housecleaning debate. I don't have a dog in the fight as to whether or not people hire housekeepers or not. I'm saying that claiming you are too good/too much of a "queen" to do your own housework, and then hiring that work out to (almost certainly) another woman, calling someone who does that work "a mule," and then claiming that's somehow female empowering is bullshit.

Cassie

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #24 on: July 03, 2015, 02:23:51 PM »
I laughed out loud when I read this.  Yes a good bra is a must. When I want fresh flowers I spend $10.00 at WalMart & it certainly is not weekly. Yes massages are great. Get one occasionally. I actually have male house cleaners-a man owns the company & they clean much better then women.  I was friends with some people for awhile that believed the universe would just provide & that I should just hold that this would happen. Sounds stupid to me & did not work out so good for them. No longer friends with them.   

justajane

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #25 on: July 03, 2015, 05:07:03 PM »
As for the house-cleaning debate: I think it's kind of insulting to call that job "degrading" or "exploitative." Imagine you're a typical house-cleaner. You have little education and few skills. You make a fair wage, your clients don't abuse you, you're paid on time. You have a flexible schedule that allows you to work around child care or sick family members. People appreciate what you do for them. Your clients are busy or sick or disabled and you come in and make their life easier.

And then one day someone comes along and says, "I'm firing you, because your job degrades you and exploits you." Did that person really just improve your life? Or was that judgment of your job as something to be ashamed of the worst thing about being a house-cleaner?
I'm not sure there's a housecleaning debate. I don't have a dog in the fight as to whether or not people hire housekeepers or not. I'm saying that claiming you are too good/too much of a "queen" to do your own housework, and then hiring that work out to (almost certainly) another woman, calling someone who does that work "a mule," and then claiming that's somehow female empowering is bullshit.

Exactly. You've said it much better than I could, especially when it comes to the gender issue.

It's not that the work is degrading; it's the inherent classism in this woman's perspective and the sense that she is above such tasks. In other words, it's not about the person doing the work; it's about the implicit attitude of the person paying for the work.

Spud

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #26 on: July 04, 2015, 01:20:13 AM »
I pulled these gems out of the comments underneath the blog post:


Sharice Styles
"My first luxury purchase was a $2,000 gucci bag. I wanted one for years but always thought I couldn't afford one. So one day I said enough is enuogh I refused to live a life of lack so I began to put away a gucci fund wink emoticon it took me a few weeks of sales (at the time I was a counter manager for sheseido cosmetics) I went to the gucci store on 55th st in NYC and paid in cash!! It felt great and they treated me like a queen. I walk in there dressed for the gods and the sale associates fought to get to me. At the end my then boyfriend now husband said two associates made a bet if I would get the large $2,000 bag or one of the smaller versions. The guy who won gave me a soda and some cookies before I left the store! LOL!! Needless to say I now own several high end bags, shoes and scarves. I just had to open my mind to it. Next stop 1st class!!!"
Like · Reply · 3 · Jun 29, 2015 1:17pm

Stephanie Synclair
"And once your mind is open, there is no going back!"


-------------

Here is a blog post from one of my favorite writers on the secret and the abundance mindset:

http://markmanson.net/the-secret

The Accidental Mustachian

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #27 on: July 04, 2015, 10:41:02 AM »
I pulled these gems out of the comments underneath the blog post:


Stephanie Synclair
"And once your mind purse is open, there is no going back!"[/i]

-------------

Here is a blog post from one of my favorite writers on the secret and the abundance mindset:

http://markmanson.net/the-secret

Fixed that for her.
« Last Edit: July 04, 2015, 10:43:08 AM by The Accidental Mustachian »

foobar

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #28 on: July 04, 2015, 06:34:47 PM »
All face-punching aside, as a dude who has chronically tight muscles and always has bits that hurt, I would kill a man to have 2x massages a week.

By a lacrosse ball for 5 bucks and you can take care of that tightness yourself.:)

Personally I want to hear more about what a money coach does and how it can be worth 3k for a weekend or so.  It sounds like an awesome gig if you can get away with advice like fly first class. You deserve it:). But I wouldn't want to deal with low class people that debate coach versus first class. I want the ones that  debate private jet versus first class. I bet they would pay 10k for the weekend:)

prudent_one

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #29 on: July 05, 2015, 02:25:14 PM »
A couple snippets from the blog post...
Quote
I've been studying and working on self development for the last five years. Youtube videos, books, audios. But it wasn't until I spent that first $5k that I saw the big change.

Since then I have invested hundreds of thousands of dollars (literally) into high ticket coaching for personal development and business.

Im constantly taking classes and learning more about lifestyle.

I've known someone like this.  They talk that same talk, but when you get to know them you find out it's all about envy. They want to be around the super-wealthy, they want to act like them, they want to look like them. And they don't even care if it makes any financial sense. Now in my little brain, I would think if you have spent hundreds of thousands on coaching, why do you still need coaching? Is that enough to get the job done? The answer is they don't care about the "learning", they care about being around those people. And the price to stay around them is high. 

"Learning more about lifestyle" = I want to know more about what rich people do so I can act the same way. How do you spend that kind of money on coaching and not yet know yourself and what lifestyle works for you?  Because it's all about copying what the others are doing.

TheGrimSqueaker

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #30 on: July 05, 2015, 06:22:23 PM »
That's the kind of blog post that gives copy editors job security.

But obviously that's far less offensive than the attitude "I'm valuable as a woman because I don't know what investment means and I need other people to do everything for me".

Same attitude, slightly more palatable way of saying it.

The writer, and most of the commenters, most likely came from family money and went to the best colleges to attain the coveted M.R.S. degree, which will provide for them as long as the Botox holds out. If she actually had to work for a living like the "mules" being so roundly denigrated by the people who hired them, the author might be willing to bestir herself to pick up a dictionary and look up the word "investment".

Clothing is only an investment if it makes you money. If she's "investing" in her appearance, it means...

Oh, hey! I get it: she only has to work 4 hours a week, but it's that "world's oldest profession" I keep hearing about.
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Cpa Cat

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #31 on: July 05, 2015, 06:53:31 PM »
The writer, and most of the commenters, most likely came from family money and went to the best colleges to attain the coveted M.R.S. degree, which will provide for them as long as the Botox holds out. If she actually had to work for a living like the "mules" being so roundly denigrated by the people who hired them, the author might be willing to bestir herself to pick up a dictionary and look up the word "investment".

I disagree. If I were to speculate, I would bet that the blogger and most of her followers are first generation college graduates, whose parents worked low-skilled jobs and possibly barely eeked their way into the middle class. Other than getting into college and getting a "good" job, there was probably very little financial knowledge or guidance passed on.

They live in fear of working like dogs, like their mothers, and their only real idea of what "success" looks like is from TV - Sex and the City, celebrities, etc. No one ever told them that success meant having savings or what it meant to invest. Every message they've ever heard is that successful people get to look and act rich.

Coveting designer handbags is a sign of new money (girls with family money who get MRS degrees have had designer bags since they were 13, and have no need to convince themselves that they deserve it - daddy did that long ago). And note that the author believes that flying First Class will expose her to people who are doing BIG THINGS - instead of the reality - that they are just normal people with first class tickets. People with family money don't have the mistaken impression that something particularly special is happening between passengers in First Class. Girls with family money who got into the best colleges for MRS degrees don't need money coaches, or business coaches, or health coaches, or life coaches - those lessons were part of their formal and informal education.

People whose parents were rich don't need to take classes about lifestyle. Classes about lifestyle are for people who are battling insecurity that they don't quite fit in to their current socio-economic class. It's almost as if the blogger is afraid that she's going to be kicked out of the "rich kids club" if they find out what she really is.

I mean... if I were going to psycho-analyze this. ;)

LeRainDrop

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #32 on: July 05, 2015, 07:13:27 PM »
The writer, and most of the commenters, most likely came from family money and went to the best colleges to attain the coveted M.R.S. degree, which will provide for them as long as the Botox holds out. If she actually had to work for a living like the "mules" being so roundly denigrated by the people who hired them, the author might be willing to bestir herself to pick up a dictionary and look up the word "investment".

I disagree. If I were to speculate, I would bet that the blogger and most of her followers are first generation college graduates, whose parents worked low-skilled jobs and possibly barely eeked their way into the middle class. Other than getting into college and getting a "good" job, there was probably very little financial knowledge or guidance passed on.

They live in fear of working like dogs, like their mothers, and their only real idea of what "success" looks like is from TV - Sex and the City, celebrities, etc. No one ever told them that success meant having savings or what it meant to invest. Every message they've ever heard is that successful people get to look and act rich.

Coveting designer handbags is a sign of new money (girls with family money who get MRS degrees have had designer bags since they were 13, and have no need to convince themselves that they deserve it - daddy did that long ago). And note that the author believes that flying First Class will expose her to people who are doing BIG THINGS - instead of the reality - that they are just normal people with first class tickets. People with family money don't have the mistaken impression that something particularly special is happening between passengers in First Class. Girls with family money who got into the best colleges for MRS degrees don't need money coaches, or business coaches, or health coaches, or life coaches - those lessons were part of their formal and informal education.

People whose parents were rich don't need to take classes about lifestyle. Classes about lifestyle are for people who are battling insecurity that they don't quite fit in to their current socio-economic class. It's almost as if the blogger is afraid that she's going to be kicked out of the "rich kids club" if they find out what she really is.

I mean... if I were going to psycho-analyze this. ;)

+1  I think Cpa Cat is spot on.

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #33 on: July 05, 2015, 08:32:45 PM »
Coveting designer handbags is a sign of new money (girls with family money who get MRS degrees have had designer bags since they were 13, and have no need to convince themselves that they deserve it - daddy did that long ago).

Twenty years ago, I'd have agreed with you. Unfortunately good taste died around the same time as the 8-track.

It used to be the case that people with old money didn't have to do tasteless, attention-seeking things. Unfortunately, those days are gone. It's not just due to the fluidity of socio-economic class or the fact that wealth seldom persists past three generations in industrial nations. It's because the multi-generational rich, and even some of the super-rich, have become just as tasteless and attention-seeking as the nouveau riche. It's like a contest as to who can become the most publicly depraved and obnoxious.

I personally think it's because the French Revolution and the early trade union days are far enough in the past for people to feel the need to make more than a token effort to hide their wealth.
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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #34 on: July 05, 2015, 08:58:28 PM »
All face-punching aside, as a dude who has chronically tight muscles and always has bits that hurt, I would kill a man to have 2x massages a week.

I have the same problem: really tight hips, quads, calves and shoulder problems.

There is a mustachian solution though: Foam Rolling. Look it up. A good foam roller costs 20-30 dollars, can be used everyday for several years and feels better than a massage in my experience. I am in control of where it pushes and how hard, for me I really push the muscles around.

Once you start there is no going back, its an almost free massage and very meditative way to unwind.

foobar

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #35 on: July 06, 2015, 03:34:07 AM »
All face-punching aside, as a dude who has chronically tight muscles and always has bits that hurt, I would kill a man to have 2x massages a week.

I have the same problem: really tight hips, quads, calves and shoulder problems.

There is a mustachian solution though: Foam Rolling. Look it up. A good foam roller costs 20-30 dollars, can be used everyday for several years and feels better than a massage in my experience. I am in control of where it pushes and how hard, for me I really push the muscles around.

Once you start there is no going back, its an almost free massage and very meditative way to unwind.

Why buy a 30 dollar foam roller when you can buy a 5 dollar lacrosse ball? Are you made out of money or something? Thats like flying first class when you could choice to fly coach:)  I don't have a  clue how good the science behind applying pressure to muscles is, but it sure feels good in the short term.

benjenn

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #36 on: July 06, 2015, 08:28:23 AM »
I used to pay my sister to clean my house for me twice a month.  I was highly paid and raising two kids on my own... the one thing I didn't have enough of was time. So the thought of spending hours cleaning my house instead of being with the kids didn't sound like a good trade to me... I'd rather pay someone else to do it.  As for paying my sister to do it -- I trusted her completely, she did a really good job for me and chances were she'd be asking me for money anyway... at least that was I getting something for it and felt like I was at least helping her earn a little money instead of just taking hand outs.  I never felt as though she were "beneath" me in any way... I was thankful to have that as an option.
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Sibley

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #37 on: July 06, 2015, 12:57:35 PM »
Her "investments":

1. A good fitting bra is good. Try to get them on sale, but it's necessary.
2. Grow your own flowers and cut them yourself.
3. It's fine to travel. Planning is a good idea though.
4. There's no shame in flying coach. Now she's just being snobby and dumb.
5. Good quality, well fitting clothing - see #1.
6. Learn to cook, teach your family to cook, and make cooking a family activity.
7. She's married, right? both learn to give massages, and exchange them.
8. There's only so far that you can go when you're as shallow as this.

sleepyguy

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #38 on: July 06, 2015, 01:40:30 PM »
Entry wouldn't be so bad if she just titled it properly... "how to blow money on things that pampers me."  Investments... LOL
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MgoSam

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #39 on: July 06, 2015, 01:49:10 PM »
As a man I don't understand the value of purses. For a $3000 purse, are they that differently designed? Is it just the brand name? Are purses something that other women would recognize and appreciate seeing someone else carrying a Gucci purse?

I do love flying first class. It isn't just that the seats are much more comfortable or that you get free alcohol or better service, the entire experience is better. Flying in coach, I usually need to zone out of everything, but in first class the time seems to fly by. My fellow passengers in first-class tend to be more enjoyable to talk to, I suspect it is because many of them fly for a living and so have some interesting stories, or they are fellow businessmen so we get a chance to compare notes. That said, I cannot ever imagine paying first-class rates. I fly a decent amount and will get upgraded from time to time, I will never pay for an upgrade. Heck, I won't even pay for drinks during my flight. If I want a drink that badly that I'm willing to buy one on a airplane flight, I'm more prone to quit drinking altogether.

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #40 on: July 06, 2015, 01:58:02 PM »
How do you even find time to have massages twice a week?

MgoSam

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #41 on: July 06, 2015, 02:07:41 PM »
How do you even find time to have massages twice a week?

She's apparently only working 4 hours a week...

Cheddar Stacker

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #42 on: July 06, 2015, 02:26:51 PM »
I don't think she understands the term "investment".

We're all investors now:
http://lackingambition.com/?p=1451
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4alpacas

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #43 on: July 06, 2015, 02:46:01 PM »
All face-punching aside, as a dude who has chronically tight muscles and always has bits that hurt, I would kill a man to have 2x massages a week.

I have the same problem: really tight hips, quads, calves and shoulder problems.

There is a mustachian solution though: Foam Rolling. Look it up. A good foam roller costs 20-30 dollars, can be used everyday for several years and feels better than a massage in my experience. I am in control of where it pushes and how hard, for me I really push the muscles around.

Once you start there is no going back, its an almost free massage and very meditative way to unwind.

Why buy a 30 dollar foam roller when you can buy a 5 dollar lacrosse ball? Are you made out of money or something? Thats like flying first class when you could choice to fly coach:)  I don't have a  clue how good the science behind applying pressure to muscles is, but it sure feels good in the short term.
I have a foam roller (paid $20), a lacrosse ball, and a tennis ball. 

Jags4186

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #44 on: July 06, 2015, 04:00:42 PM »
I legitimately want to face punch this woman.

iris lily

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #45 on: July 06, 2015, 04:41:06 PM »
I don't want to judge but I think I would probably hate the writer if I met her in real life.

People like her make normal people feel bad about their lives. 

...

Oh maybe some people feel inferior in comparison, but not me. I'll bet $10 that her 4 hour weeks are one big fat lie, and that she more often than not borrows money from her mom or the payday loan people to fund next month's rent. That is unless she's got a husband to fund her sh$t and if so, I feel sorry for hat man.

GuitarStv

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #46 on: July 06, 2015, 05:06:15 PM »
You can replace a foam roller with a PVC pipe and get pretty much the same results. - Dude who has foam rolled with a length of PVC pipe for years

Avidconsumer

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #47 on: July 07, 2015, 01:06:32 PM »
She's just minted. It's ridiculous that this can be conceived as advice.

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #48 on: July 07, 2015, 03:03:28 PM »
Frak!!! This woman is nuts.

Quote
after all, I'd just gave her 3k to help me with money issues as a woman
Her main money issue is the fact that she paid someone 3K to tell her what her money issues are. I wonder if the lady told her that her willingness to pay someone to tell her what her money problems are, are the problem....wow I feel like I just went down the rabbit hole there. I would charge her only 1.5K to tell her that she shouldn't pay me anymore, and should invest the money instead. I think she's more the type of the person who just wants someone to tell her that it's ok to spend money on stuff, like first class and shmancy flowers all the time. Paying someone who tells you to invest isn't that sexy I guess.

I neeeeed a chef, it makes me feel like such a woman.  Gag.

The argument about cleaning ladies is touchy, but really I think it comes down to individual comfort, and happiness and how the work is balanced in the home. I really want a cleaning lady. Why? Because I often have evenings where my husband goes out to his sporty class and I am up working on tyding up the disaster of the house, mopping, dishes etc until 10:30 and then I do the kid's lunches. I resent it, a lot. But my attempts to get the kids and the DH into some sort of regular cleaning schedule end up in fights about who should do what, and me running after everyone to do their part. I hate it. I would love to have someone who cleaned my house and folded my laundry, but I also feel crappy about spending $200 per month on this even though it really would make me sooooo happy.

Sibley

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Re: This blog entry... oh boy...
« Reply #49 on: July 07, 2015, 04:05:31 PM »
Frak!!! This woman is nuts.

Quote
The argument about cleaning ladies is touchy, but really I think it comes down to individual comfort, and happiness and how the work is balanced in the home. I really want a cleaning lady. Why? Because I often have evenings where my husband goes out to his sporty class and I am up working on tyding up the disaster of the house, mopping, dishes etc until 10:30 and then I do the kid's lunches. I resent it, a lot. But my attempts to get the kids and the DH into some sort of regular cleaning schedule end up in fights about who should do what, and me running after everyone to do their part. I hate it. I would love to have someone who cleaned my house and folded my laundry, but I also feel crappy about spending $200 per month on this even though it really would make me sooooo happy.

TGod, how about this. You go out to some class or whatever, and communicate clearly with DH that the house needs to be in this shape and that needs to be done before he's done, and that's fair because that's what you make sure is done on his nights out, so you deserve the same treatment. This needs to be as frequent as his nights out (2x a week, etc). If nothing else, you get a break.