Both the college thing and the wedding thing are tough, and a LOT of it depends on who you hang out with. I remember reading this article when it came out.
If you are a middle class family, depending on who you hang out with, it is really cool to go to Stanford or Harvard. But honestly, it's not affordable for most people. The really poor? Yes (a neighbor kid went to Yale on full scholarship.) The wealthy? Sure. The middle class...meh...I went to really expensive university (as did my spouse), at the level of Harvard and Stanford. However, spouse's parents said "yeah, we can't afford that" so he joined ROTC to pay for tuition. My parents were divorced and I got a lot of financial aid (we were poor), but I looked at the costs the first year and immediately joined ROTC also. I earned a 3-year scholarship. There are still ways for middle class kids to go to fancy schools, but I wouldn't necessarily recommend it in the current climate.
If you are a really poor kid, or you have a good head on your shoulders, or your parents are either not interested it all or very matter of fact, you'll maybe get good advice. CC for 2 years, transfer to uni later, you'll be fine. State school. Etc. If you are middle class and you are really smart and you hang with all these kids going to Stanford or MIT or Harvard? It's hard to hold off on that. My kid wants to go to such an expensive school. Right now I'm just hoping he won't get in (but we can afford it, regardless). Parents have to be blunt, and not all parents can be blunt. Especially if these schools have such cache.
My college buddies complain about how expensive our alma mater is "can't afford to send my kid there". Well, we were all in ROTC, so it's not like your parents could afford it 30 years ago either (but yeah, it's way worse now).
On the wedding thing...I really really didn't want a wedding. Hate being the center of attention. Hate it. I lost that battle to my spouse, but he paid for the wedding. And, it was reasonably sized and priced for the time. Weddings have been growing in size and fanciness for years. Now it's not just the wedding, but ... if you got engaged on a fabulous vacation to Europe, then your honeymoon MUST be better and longer and more expensive. Set a $20k budget? Well, $30k is okay. Don't get me started on the destination bachelor parties.