Author Topic: Sweet 16  (Read 8023 times)

AM43

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Sweet 16
« on: June 15, 2015, 09:36:52 AM »
So i had to share this with you guys.
I spoke to my sister and she was telling me about her 2 kids(my nieces) attending Sweet 16 party of their friend.
We start getting into details and here is what I hear.
Parents of the girl are taking group of about 10 people to Jamaica to celebrate.
They are renting big house, hiring a cook to cook them some meals, paying for all sightseeing, going out to eat and all that other BS.
My sister has to come up with $600 for plane tickets for both, but parents of the girl only travel on certain airlines they prefer and refuse to buy tickets for cheaper airline, so they offer to pay the difference.
All this for 4 days trip that will prob cost them 10K if not more.
Am I losing my mind or some people are out of touch with reality.
« Last Edit: June 15, 2015, 09:40:06 AM by AM43 »

Shinplaster

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #1 on: June 15, 2015, 10:36:03 AM »
I can't even wrap my head around this one.  No way would I be paying for anything to do with this self-indulgent nonsense.

My sweet sixteen party (eons ago!) was a sleepover with about 10 friends.   With a cake and pizza.   And we had a blast.

MgoSam

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #2 on: June 15, 2015, 10:44:53 AM »
I had a pretty elaborate Sweet 16 party compared to the average American, but it was considered very modest by my community's standards. For some reason 16th birthdays are very important for the Indian-American community and though I wanted a very simple event, my parents found it hard because they had so many family and friends that wanted to come and it was considered insulting not to invite a lot of people. We held it at a restaurant and I don't know how much it ran, but it likely was pretty expensive. The sad part is that most of the adults that came hardly knew me, but it is a society thing so everyone felt the need to come.

Pigeon

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #3 on: June 15, 2015, 11:07:42 AM »
Ridiculous sweet 16 parties are pretty common where I live these days.  Not everyone flies to a foreign country ridiculous (seriously, that's when you RSVP NO), but a hundred of your closest friends at some venue ridiculous.

My poor child.  We had a cake at home, with a few presents and she had a girlfriend sleep over.  She was also thought it slightly unfair that she was not entitled to a bat mitzvah or a quinceanera.  She attended a number of these that were pretty elaborate.

It is no wonder that weddings are insane because what else is left to do by that point?

jinga nation

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #4 on: June 15, 2015, 11:10:04 AM »
I had a pretty elaborate Sweet 16 party compared to the average American, but it was considered very modest by my community's standards. For some reason 16th birthdays are very important for the Indian-American community and though I wanted a very simple event, my parents found it hard because they had so many family and friends that wanted to come and it was considered insulting not to invite a lot of people. We held it at a restaurant and I don't know how much it ran, but it likely was pretty expensive. The sad part is that most of the adults that came hardly knew me, but it is a society thing so everyone felt the need to come.

Don't get me started on Indian-Americans. Their Sweet 16 parties for girls are more elaborate than some Indian weddings.

surfhb

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #5 on: June 16, 2015, 12:12:09 AM »
Off all the great places to see and do in this country, they go to Jamaica?    Sorry Jamaica....you kinda suck

marty998

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #6 on: June 16, 2015, 02:20:08 AM »
And the parents think they can control 10 teens in a foreign country without one of them getting lost, getting sick, getting obscenely fall-down-need-stomach-pumped drunk or getting pregnant?

good luck

iamlittlehedgehog

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #7 on: June 16, 2015, 11:30:42 AM »
Just think of what this girl is gonna want for her wedding in a few years. If you are already establishing that type of spending pattern for big events then someone is gonna wanna be a princess for her wedding day (horse drawn carriage and tiara included)

Elderwood17

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #8 on: June 17, 2015, 06:56:16 PM »
On my 16th birthday I passed my drivers test, got to take the family car out, but my dad insisted I be home before dark.  Probably cost $1.50 for gas total.

MgoSam

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #9 on: June 18, 2015, 01:43:40 PM »
I had a pretty elaborate Sweet 16 party compared to the average American, but it was considered very modest by my community's standards. For some reason 16th birthdays are very important for the Indian-American community and though I wanted a very simple event, my parents found it hard because they had so many family and friends that wanted to come and it was considered insulting not to invite a lot of people. We held it at a restaurant and I don't know how much it ran, but it likely was pretty expensive. The sad part is that most of the adults that came hardly knew me, but it is a society thing so everyone felt the need to come.

Don't get me started on Indian-Americans. Their Sweet 16 parties for girls are more elaborate than some Indian weddings.

Agree with the first sentence, suprised at the second. The Indian weddings in my family are way too elaborate and expensive, and the kicker is that the favorite thing for people to do afterwards is talking about anything that sucked..."speeches were too long, not enough Johnny Walker Black, ___ was put at the wrong table...."

If I ever do get married, I will not be doing an elaborate wedding. My parents are welcome to throw me a wedding reception if they want, but it will be their choice and responsibility as the only purpose of such events is to show off.

jinga nation

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #10 on: June 18, 2015, 01:58:01 PM »
I had a pretty elaborate Sweet 16 party compared to the average American, but it was considered very modest by my community's standards. For some reason 16th birthdays are very important for the Indian-American community and though I wanted a very simple event, my parents found it hard because they had so many family and friends that wanted to come and it was considered insulting not to invite a lot of people. We held it at a restaurant and I don't know how much it ran, but it likely was pretty expensive. The sad part is that most of the adults that came hardly knew me, but it is a society thing so everyone felt the need to come.

Don't get me started on Indian-Americans. Their Sweet 16 parties for girls are more elaborate than some Indian weddings.

Agree with the first sentence, suprised at the second. The Indian weddings in my family are way too elaborate and expensive, and the kicker is that the favorite thing for people to do afterwards is talking about anything that sucked..."speeches were too long, not enough Johnny Walker Black, ___ was put at the wrong table...."

If I ever do get married, I will not be doing an elaborate wedding. My parents are welcome to throw me a wedding reception if they want, but it will be their choice and responsibility as the only purpose of such events is to show off.

Aha! You have the JW-crowd, not the Famous Grouse or Chivas Regal or JD. Worse are those who expect Single Malt Scotch.

Yup, Indian weddings are a chance to invite business connections, etc. And a mega-bitch fest to point out negatives on food, other people's clothes, the weather, the caterer, the staff, the groom and bride didn't smile, they didn't properly respect so-and-so...

My wife and I were lucky that her parents paid for the wedding and dinner, and my parents paid for the reception and dinner (different days, different guest lists). There was no formal seating and it was a buffet, traditional Kenyan-Indian style. With 10 years coming up in December, and having bit by the real estate bug, my wife and I sometimes feel we should have taken the intended wedding expenses, or even half, and invested it in a Lazy Portfolio.

sabertooth3

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #11 on: June 18, 2015, 02:06:54 PM »
It's not just Indians; I grew up in the Northeast US and practically every girl I grew up with had a Sweet 16 party that was fully catered, DJ'd, gifts, candle lightings, and dancing. They were like a traditional American wedding reception.

stlbrah

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #12 on: June 18, 2015, 06:53:40 PM »
Never heard of this abomination. Sometimes living in a bfe midwest city is not such a bad thing

MgoSam

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #13 on: June 19, 2015, 10:04:52 AM »
Never heard of this abomination. Sometimes living in a bfe midwest city is not such a bad thing

YUP! Of course there are exceptions, but nearly everyone I know in the East Coast feels a need to be more flashy than their neighbor, as if the worth of someone is measured by their car, or their house. And what I also can't stand is that they feel the need to tell you how much it was. I heard of a guy that just bought a house and congratulated him and his friend said, "Yeah, it cost ____." I almost wanted to say, "I don't give a rat's ass how much it cost," but just nodded and went away, thinking that he likely pays more in property taxes than I spend all year, and that's why they are both in their 40s and 50s and working and by then I plan to be out of the game.

MgoSam

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #14 on: June 19, 2015, 10:07:40 AM »
I had a pretty elaborate Sweet 16 party compared to the average American, but it was considered very modest by my community's standards. For some reason 16th birthdays are very important for the Indian-American community and though I wanted a very simple event, my parents found it hard because they had so many family and friends that wanted to come and it was considered insulting not to invite a lot of people. We held it at a restaurant and I don't know how much it ran, but it likely was pretty expensive. The sad part is that most of the adults that came hardly knew me, but it is a society thing so everyone felt the need to come.

Don't get me started on Indian-Americans. Their Sweet 16 parties for girls are more elaborate than some Indian weddings.

Agree with the first sentence, suprised at the second. The Indian weddings in my family are way too elaborate and expensive, and the kicker is that the favorite thing for people to do afterwards is talking about anything that sucked..."speeches were too long, not enough Johnny Walker Black, ___ was put at the wrong table...."

If I ever do get married, I will not be doing an elaborate wedding. My parents are welcome to throw me a wedding reception if they want, but it will be their choice and responsibility as the only purpose of such events is to show off.

Aha! You have the JW-crowd, not the Famous Grouse or Chivas Regal or JD. Worse are those who expect Single Malt Scotch.

Yup, Indian weddings are a chance to invite business connections, etc. And a mega-bitch fest to point out negatives on food, other people's clothes, the weather, the caterer, the staff, the groom and bride didn't smile, they didn't properly respect so-and-so...

My wife and I were lucky that her parents paid for the wedding and dinner, and my parents paid for the reception and dinner (different days, different guest lists). There was no formal seating and it was a buffet, traditional Kenyan-Indian style. With 10 years coming up in December, and having bit by the real estate bug, my wife and I sometimes feel we should have taken the intended wedding expenses, or even half, and invested it in a Lazy Portfolio.

Yeah, I shudder to think what would happen if one of the uncles discovers single-malt. My fate is not tied to such a community, my only hope is to find a wife that doesn't want such a wedding. A friend of mine went to a wedding that was in the couple's backyard, with food made by their neighbor who has a restaurant, and the couple spent the morning making cupcakes to serve for dessert. On the invitation they asked people to dress casually (kakkis and polo's), and said that there is a bar a block away for people to go to after 10 pm because "we have something to do and would prefer having privacy to do it." That couple is now my hero!

partgypsy

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #15 on: June 19, 2015, 10:21:22 AM »
I'm from the Midwest. when I was growing up Sweet sixteen parties weren't a thing, but as that was 20 years ago, that may have changed. Some people did splash big for prom though. Fancy restaurant, rent a car, etc. Men were expected to bring a nice flower corsage for date.

LiveLean

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #16 on: June 19, 2015, 11:18:57 AM »
Just when it looked like we had run out of plots for Liam Neeson Taken movies...

If you're Generation X or older, the one and only thing you wanted for your 16th birthday was a drivers license. I remember vividly going to the DMV with my Mom and driving around for the rest of the day. I wouldn't have thought to ask for anything else. We probably had cake at home as a family.

Today many kids don't care if they get a license or not at 16. A phone is more important and they've had that for years.

mm1970

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #17 on: June 19, 2015, 02:42:20 PM »
I had a pretty elaborate Sweet 16 party compared to the average American, but it was considered very modest by my community's standards. For some reason 16th birthdays are very important for the Indian-American community and though I wanted a very simple event, my parents found it hard because they had so many family and friends that wanted to come and it was considered insulting not to invite a lot of people. We held it at a restaurant and I don't know how much it ran, but it likely was pretty expensive. The sad part is that most of the adults that came hardly knew me, but it is a society thing so everyone felt the need to come.

Don't get me started on Indian-Americans. Their Sweet 16 parties for girls are more elaborate than some Indian weddings.

Agree with the first sentence, suprised at the second. The Indian weddings in my family are way too elaborate and expensive, and the kicker is that the favorite thing for people to do afterwards is talking about anything that sucked..."speeches were too long, not enough Johnny Walker Black, ___ was put at the wrong table...."

If I ever do get married, I will not be doing an elaborate wedding. My parents are welcome to throw me a wedding reception if they want, but it will be their choice and responsibility as the only purpose of such events is to show off.

Aha! You have the JW-crowd, not the Famous Grouse or Chivas Regal or JD. Worse are those who expect Single Malt Scotch.

Yup, Indian weddings are a chance to invite business connections, etc. And a mega-bitch fest to point out negatives on food, other people's clothes, the weather, the caterer, the staff, the groom and bride didn't smile, they didn't properly respect so-and-so...

My wife and I were lucky that her parents paid for the wedding and dinner, and my parents paid for the reception and dinner (different days, different guest lists). There was no formal seating and it was a buffet, traditional Kenyan-Indian style. With 10 years coming up in December, and having bit by the real estate bug, my wife and I sometimes feel we should have taken the intended wedding expenses, or even half, and invested it in a Lazy Portfolio.
I attended one Indian wedding of a coworker/ friend.  It was pretty fabulous, I must admit.  I am a fabric hound, so I simply loved admiring the saris and dresses (most of the women changed between the wedding and reception).  And the food was fabulous.

MgoSam

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #18 on: June 19, 2015, 02:46:42 PM »
I had a pretty elaborate Sweet 16 party compared to the average American, but it was considered very modest by my community's standards. For some reason 16th birthdays are very important for the Indian-American community and though I wanted a very simple event, my parents found it hard because they had so many family and friends that wanted to come and it was considered insulting not to invite a lot of people. We held it at a restaurant and I don't know how much it ran, but it likely was pretty expensive. The sad part is that most of the adults that came hardly knew me, but it is a society thing so everyone felt the need to come.

Don't get me started on Indian-Americans. Their Sweet 16 parties for girls are more elaborate than some Indian weddings.

Agree with the first sentence, suprised at the second. The Indian weddings in my family are way too elaborate and expensive, and the kicker is that the favorite thing for people to do afterwards is talking about anything that sucked..."speeches were too long, not enough Johnny Walker Black, ___ was put at the wrong table...."

If I ever do get married, I will not be doing an elaborate wedding. My parents are welcome to throw me a wedding reception if they want, but it will be their choice and responsibility as the only purpose of such events is to show off.

Aha! You have the JW-crowd, not the Famous Grouse or Chivas Regal or JD. Worse are those who expect Single Malt Scotch.

Yup, Indian weddings are a chance to invite business connections, etc. And a mega-bitch fest to point out negatives on food, other people's clothes, the weather, the caterer, the staff, the groom and bride didn't smile, they didn't properly respect so-and-so...

My wife and I were lucky that her parents paid for the wedding and dinner, and my parents paid for the reception and dinner (different days, different guest lists). There was no formal seating and it was a buffet, traditional Kenyan-Indian style. With 10 years coming up in December, and having bit by the real estate bug, my wife and I sometimes feel we should have taken the intended wedding expenses, or even half, and invested it in a Lazy Portfolio.
I attended one Indian wedding of a coworker/ friend.  It was pretty fabulous, I must admit.  I am a fabric hound, so I simply loved admiring the saris and dresses (most of the women changed between the wedding and reception).  And the food was fabulous.

Yeah, non-Indians seem to really appreciate Indian weddings. They can be cool, I'll admit. The part I don't like is the drama, stress, and the bill at the end of it. It also doesn't help that it seems that people spend the next week talking about how bad everything was compared to another wedding (which they also talked shit about).

mm1970

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #19 on: June 19, 2015, 02:50:38 PM »
It's not just Indians; I grew up in the Northeast US and practically every girl I grew up with had a Sweet 16 party that was fully catered, DJ'd, gifts, candle lightings, and dancing. They were like a traditional American wedding reception.
We never had that in my rural area of the northeast.  But now I live in California.  Lots of quinceaneras.  (spelling?)

I was talking to a business associate yesterday about kids (we each have two and have known each other before kids).  He's further south in California.  He was coaching soccer for his 5 year old, and it so happens that most of the girls on the team were from a private school a short walk from their house (and they all wanted to be on the same team).  A private school that is $30k per year, starting with preschool and going to high school. So these are families with a good half million to spend on school.

Even at 5, the privileged girls had attitude problems.  At one point, one of their mothers said to him "well, I think it's great that my daughter gets the opportunity to meet and play with people in other financial levels than ours", like they were the poor cousins or whatever.

(This is the semiconductor industry, guy is been doing it a long time, he's not poor!!)

Davids

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #20 on: June 19, 2015, 04:28:47 PM »
I remember my Sister's sweet 16, I was 9 and me and my dad stood watch making sure no boys tried to come over.

MgoSam

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #21 on: June 19, 2015, 04:30:49 PM »

Even at 5, the privileged girls had attitude problems.  At one point, one of their mothers said to him "well, I think it's great that my daughter gets the opportunity to meet and play with people in other financial levels than ours", like they were the poor cousins or whatever.

They may have attitude problems, but I don't disagree with the mother. It is good for people to meet people from other circumstances. I grew up in an affluent family, and liked spending my summer working at Burger Kings. The work wasn't pleasant but it was good to work and see how other people lived, and it is embarrassing to say this but I might not have known then. I went to be public school, but it was in a very good school district.

forummm

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #22 on: June 19, 2015, 05:16:08 PM »
On my 16th birthday I passed my drivers test, got to take the family car out, but my dad insisted I be home before dark.  Probably cost $1.50 for gas total.

I didn't even get this. We couldn't afford the car insurance for me. And I never had birthday parties as a kid either. Sometimes a few cousins would come over for some cake.

Sibley

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #23 on: June 23, 2015, 11:41:34 AM »
Was walking around downtown Chicago last weekend, and saw a girl getting pictures done for what looked like a quinceanera (sp?). She was wearing this huge dress, with massive hoop skirts. Seriously, the dress was wider than she was tall, and it was really windy so the dress was getting blown all over the place. She didn't have anything on underneath either.

AM43

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Re: Sweet 16
« Reply #24 on: June 23, 2015, 01:11:32 PM »
This is terrible.  The parents deserve several face-punches.  It truly is hard to love a world where things like this happen.  These parents probably have nothing saved for retirement and are sentenced to work for 50 years in order for their spoiled kids to go on international vacations before they are old enough to appreciate it.  If it were my daughter I would not let her go on this trip unless she earned the money for the trip herself.

This is all expenses paid trip by girl's parents, which I agree with you deserve more than several face punches.
Everyone who is going on this trip still has to come up with $300 for plane tickets and I am sure some pocket change.
So in my sister's case its $600(2 girls) plus pocket money.
Totally screwed up if you ask me.