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Retirement Police strike again

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Prairie Stash:
My spouse is celebrating her last day today. We belong to the same company, different departments. Our company has a employee club where we pay money every month and they organize a small monthly event (ice cream in the summer, a cupcake day etc.). They also send out gift baskets for births, deaths and retirements; saving us from the card passed around money raising some people get (does anyone like those on the spot money requests?).

Today being her retirement (FIRE) at a young age, she will not receive a retirement gift. Instead its considered farewell, basically the same thing except for the retirement gift.

I don't know what else to call it, she's leaving work to spend time with our family and has no plans to return to the workforce. To me that's retirement, to everyone else its confusion.

MarciaB:
Did she get a card, or was there a potluck or something?

HPstache:
I'm kinda with your company on this.  When my wife left her job to become a stay at home mom (possibly never returning to the workforce) we didn't go around telling people she was "retiring" or expect people to celebrate it as a "retirement party"  It is indeed much more of a "farewell" in my opinion and that's how it was treated.

Prairie Stash:

--- Quote from: MarciaB on April 20, 2018, 04:33:19 PM ---Did she get a card, or was there a potluck or something?

--- End quote ---
There was a card, it was nice. Since our staff association does the gifts we don't pass the hat too often, although I have been hit up occasionally for others. I think most people would be surprised to find out she received nothing, our coworkers are usually very generous, but most would assume the staff ssociation had it covered. When we had our first child we had a baby pool (guess the date, weight etc.) to raise money for a local charity, it was sucessful, we have great coworkers.

She worked for over 13 years at the company, retirement gifts are given after 10 years employment. The policy makes no mention of age, just minimum service time. It was an arbitrary decision, at the hands of a few people, its a social club run by staff with rules to ensure fairness (not the companies fault). They envisioned a 60 year old getting hired and leaving after 2 years, that person wouldn't fulfill the minimum timeframe. However a younger perons retiring fits the associations service length, but apparently not the unwritten rules on age. As an association they have bylaws, we occasionally need to vote on revisions (the last was to increase our monthly dues).

I don't care about the money or gifts, my sore point is the minimal acknowledgement. She retired, its a major achievement, it feels diminished if others won't accept it.

TheGrimSqueaker:

--- Quote from: Prairie Stash on April 20, 2018, 06:18:06 PM ---
--- Quote from: MarciaB on April 20, 2018, 04:33:19 PM ---Did she get a card, or was there a potluck or something?

--- End quote ---
There was a card, it was nice. Since our staff association does the gifts we don't pass the hat too often, although I have been hit up occasionally for others. I think most people would be surprised to find out she received nothing, our coworkers are usually very generous, but most would assume the staff ssociation had it covered. When we had our first child we had a baby pool (guess the date, weight etc.) to raise money for a local charity, it was sucessful, we have great coworkers.

She worked for over 13 years at the company, retirement gifts are given after 10 years employment. The policy makes no mention of age, just minimum service time. It was an arbitrary decision, at the hands of a few people, its a social club run by staff with rules to ensure fairness (not the companies fault). They envisioned a 60 year old getting hired and leaving after 2 years, that person wouldn't fulfill the minimum timeframe. However a younger perons retiring fits the associations service length, but apparently not the unwritten rules on age. As an association they have bylaws, we occasionally need to vote on revisions (the last was to increase our monthly dues).

I don't care about the money or gifts, my sore point is the minimal acknowledgement. She retired, its a major achievement, it feels diminished if others won't accept it.

--- End quote ---

When you retire it will be different and you will be acknowledged for it since you're (a) male, and (b) not with a wife still in the workforce.

From the outside looking in (which is the only view of your family's finances that your co-workers can see), what your wife is doing looks no different from a woman deciding to be a stay at home spouse for a breadwinner, which is a different kind of career. If it were you retiring and not your wife, the move would most likely be taken seriously and acknowledged, due in part to the (frequently false but common) assumption that you're the major breadwinner.

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