Author Topic: Relatives who just don't get it  (Read 3478870 times)

Playing with Fire UK

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3200 on: July 11, 2017, 01:30:54 AM »
My in-laws are excited about a new grandbaby. They've heard that it is a good thing to save for a child's future, so they set up a savings account. So far, so good?

No, because they 'never have any spare cash', so they take out a new loan (on top of the many existing ones), and put that in an instant access account. When it is suggested to them that this is a terrible idea, they start talking about how the interest will grow and now is the best time to invest for a child.

The loan is 14 percentage points higher than the savings account.

Linea_Norway

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3201 on: July 11, 2017, 04:32:40 AM »
My in-laws are excited about a new grandbaby. They've heard that it is a good thing to save for a child's future, so they set up a savings account. So far, so good?

No, because they 'never have any spare cash', so they take out a new loan (on top of the many existing ones), and put that in an instant access account. When it is suggested to them that this is a terrible idea, they start talking about how the interest will grow and now is the best time to invest for a child.

The loan is 14 percentage points higher than the savings account.

I can't believe it, people being so plain stupid...

Playing with Fire UK

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3202 on: July 11, 2017, 05:35:31 AM »
My in-laws are excited about a new grandbaby. They've heard that it is a good thing to save for a child's future, so they set up a savings account. So far, so good?

No, because they 'never have any spare cash', so they take out a new loan (on top of the many existing ones), and put that in an instant access account. When it is suggested to them that this is a terrible idea, they start talking about how the interest will grow and now is the best time to invest for a child.

The loan is 14 percentage points higher than the savings account.

I can't believe it, people being so plain stupid...

Yes. The worst thing is: they do have a point. They pay the bills first, then spend what is leftover (down to the maximum of the overdraft), every single month, and then stop spending (or spend on credit if emergencies* come up).

They will never have money at the end of the month. Not in this lifetime. So the only way this savings account is ever going to get funded is this outrageously expensive loan.

*Past emergencies have included wanting toys for cats and seeing some nice furniture that was the same style as the dining room.

shelivesthedream

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3203 on: July 11, 2017, 06:02:56 AM »
My in-laws are excited about a new grandbaby. They've heard that it is a good thing to save for a child's future, so they set up a savings account. So far, so good?

No, because they 'never have any spare cash', so they take out a new loan (on top of the many existing ones), and put that in an instant access account. When it is suggested to them that this is a terrible idea, they start talking about how the interest will grow and now is the best time to invest for a child.

The loan is 14 percentage points higher than the savings account.

Presumably they are unable/unwilling to connect the dots between one kind of interest growing and another.

Feivel2000

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3204 on: July 11, 2017, 09:10:47 AM »
It's fascinating how they know they can make the loan payment every month but are not able to make an equal saving rate.
Compound interest works in favour of the grand child, but against them...

Vindicated

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3205 on: July 11, 2017, 12:20:52 PM »
Talked to my parents last night, they said "Come over tomorrow after work and buy some stuff for us on your Amazon account.  We'll pay for it, but we don't have Prime."   I think to myself, Alright! I can have them pay me cash, then use my Amazon Chase card, and I'll get 20% of the purchases back in reward points on Prime day, heck yeah!.  I don't say that though.  I ask, "What do you guys need to buy?"  My Dad says, "I want to get a TV."  Me, "For where?  Is something wrong with your TV?" (they currently have a pretty nice and large TV, and I think it's only 2 years old).  My Dad, "No, I just want a 4K TV."  Ugh.

To add to this, I know they have several thousand dollars in credit card debt, and my Dad said they're behind on their savings this year since he hasn't worked as much as a usual year.

So, now, do I just "forget" to stop by, and see if they forget too?  Or do I go, and try to prevent them from doing too much damage?

Sibley

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3206 on: July 11, 2017, 12:33:03 PM »
Talked to my parents last night, they said "Come over tomorrow after work and buy some stuff for us on your Amazon account.  We'll pay for it, but we don't have Prime."   I think to myself, Alright! I can have them pay me cash, then use my Amazon Chase card, and I'll get 20% of the purchases back in reward points on Prime day, heck yeah!.  I don't say that though.  I ask, "What do you guys need to buy?"  My Dad says, "I want to get a TV."  Me, "For where?  Is something wrong with your TV?" (they currently have a pretty nice and large TV, and I think it's only 2 years old).  My Dad, "No, I just want a 4K TV."  Ugh.

To add to this, I know they have several thousand dollars in credit card debt, and my Dad said they're behind on their savings this year since he hasn't worked as much as a usual year.

So, now, do I just "forget" to stop by, and see if they forget too?  Or do I go, and try to prevent them from doing too much damage?

Wasn't yesterday Prime day?

Vindicated

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3207 on: July 11, 2017, 12:42:31 PM »
Talked to my parents last night, they said "Come over tomorrow after work and buy some stuff for us on your Amazon account.  We'll pay for it, but we don't have Prime."   I think to myself, Alright! I can have them pay me cash, then use my Amazon Chase card, and I'll get 20% of the purchases back in reward points on Prime day, heck yeah!.  I don't say that though.  I ask, "What do you guys need to buy?"  My Dad says, "I want to get a TV."  Me, "For where?  Is something wrong with your TV?" (they currently have a pretty nice and large TV, and I think it's only 2 years old).  My Dad, "No, I just want a 4K TV."  Ugh.

To add to this, I know they have several thousand dollars in credit card debt, and my Dad said they're behind on their savings this year since he hasn't worked as much as a usual year.

So, now, do I just "forget" to stop by, and see if they forget too?  Or do I go, and try to prevent them from doing too much damage?

Wasn't yesterday Prime day?

Started at 6pm yesterday, and runs through tonight.

nouveauRiche

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3208 on: July 11, 2017, 12:51:14 PM »
Withdrawing my comment.  Apologies for participating in this way-off-topic discussion.
« Last Edit: July 14, 2017, 12:34:29 PM by nouveauRiche »

infogoon

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3209 on: July 11, 2017, 01:13:40 PM »
Maybe we can get back on track about relatives who just don't get it and leave the politics for a different thread ???

Ironically, all this arguing about religions is sounding a lot like my Relatives Who Just Don't Get It.

GrumpyPenguin

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3210 on: July 11, 2017, 01:18:41 PM »
My in-laws are excited about a new grandbaby. They've heard that it is a good thing to save for a child's future, so they set up a savings account. So far, so good?

No, because they 'never have any spare cash', so they take out a new loan (on top of the many existing ones), and put that in an instant access account. When it is suggested to them that this is a terrible idea, they start talking about how the interest will grow and now is the best time to invest for a child.

The loan is 14 percentage points higher than the savings account.

Wow, my jaw dropped at that one... I think you win the prize for this page.

Abundant life

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3211 on: July 11, 2017, 01:21:34 PM »
US Muslims are a minority group with a heavy sample bias towards highly educated people who have the ability and the will to jump through immigration hoops. By and large, they're fucking great, and a fine addition to any modern society. I'll take them over Bible Thumpers any day of the week.

+1
I'm glad that you have had positive experiences with your Muslim neighbours. My imperfect but upstanding Dad used to say, 'there are good and bad in all'. What would your reaction be if insulting words were used to describe your Muslim friends?

Warlord1986

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3212 on: July 11, 2017, 02:47:43 PM »
US Muslims are a minority group with a heavy sample bias towards highly educated people who have the ability and the will to jump through immigration hoops. By and large, they're fucking great, and a fine addition to any modern society. I'll take them over Bible Thumpers any day of the week.

I have Muslim friends. They're nice people. They've never insulted my religion by calling us all as 'Bible Thumpers.'

My perpetually broke and in-debt scumbag sibling and his meal ticket have purchased a house on a beach up in the northern hinterlands of New England. It already needs repairs. I seriously doubt either of them has anything resembling the skills needed to fix it.

mustachepungoeshere

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3213 on: July 11, 2017, 04:53:12 PM »
My husband's 31-year-old relative just went in for dental work and came out with a $5000 bill (he hadn't been to the dentist in more than 10 years, now dealing with impact wisdom teeth and other problems).

He couldn't pay it so he asked his parents. They couldn't pay it so they asked their parents.

Playing with Fire UK

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3214 on: July 12, 2017, 05:31:47 AM »
It's fascinating how they know they can make the loan payment every month but are not able to make an equal saving rate.
Compound interest works in favour of the grand child, but against them...

People are infinitely fascinating.

Wow, my jaw dropped at that one... I think you win the prize for this page.

Excellent! What is my prize? I'm guessing a sore head from banging it against a wall.

charis

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3215 on: July 12, 2017, 08:58:37 AM »
We rented a larger vehicle for a recent trip that required more car space and a lot of driving.  It was $200 for a holiday week, not terrible, but not the best deal I've gotten.

My MIL overhead a conversation I was having with my husband in which I said the words, "our next rental car" (referring to next occasion when we may need to rent a car).  She misinterprets this to mean that we are getting another rental when we are done with the current one (for what purpose I have no idea). 

When I correct her, she says: "you guys should keep driving rental cars, you get such great deals."  She says it twice, seriously.  Keep in mind that we own two functional cars that we paid for years ago.

MrMoogle

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3216 on: July 12, 2017, 11:54:59 AM »
We rented a larger vehicle for a recent trip that required more car space and a lot of driving.  It was $200 for a holiday week, not terrible, but not the best deal I've gotten.

My MIL overhead a conversation I was having with my husband in which I said the words, "our next rental car" (referring to next occasion when we may need to rent a car).  She misinterprets this to mean that we are getting another rental when we are done with the current one (for what purpose I have no idea). 

When I correct her, she says: "you guys should keep driving rental cars, you get such great deals."  She says it twice, seriously.  Keep in mind that we own two functional cars that we paid for years ago.
Yes, $200/week, that's only $10k per year.  You should keep doing that.  At that rate you can buy a $100k car every 10 years.  How could someone think that's a good decision? 

MgoSam

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3217 on: July 12, 2017, 12:11:35 PM »
We rented a larger vehicle for a recent trip that required more car space and a lot of driving.  It was $200 for a holiday week, not terrible, but not the best deal I've gotten.

My MIL overhead a conversation I was having with my husband in which I said the words, "our next rental car" (referring to next occasion when we may need to rent a car).  She misinterprets this to mean that we are getting another rental when we are done with the current one (for what purpose I have no idea). 

When I correct her, she says: "you guys should keep driving rental cars, you get such great deals."  She says it twice, seriously.  Keep in mind that we own two functional cars that we paid for years ago.
Yes, $200/week, that's only $10k per year.  You should keep doing that.  At that rate you can buy a $100k car every 10 years.  How could someone think that's a good decision?

LOL. I can definitely see it being a good deal for someone to rely on rentals but that's only if they only need a car on an occassional basis. Like if they need it for an hour or two once a week and use a service like Zipcar. That way it forces you to rely more on biking and public transit, and makes you more conscious of your car use. I have a car and don't enjoy biking so I'll admit there are plenty of times that I'll get in my car and go somewhere that I didn't need to.

AlanStache

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3218 on: July 12, 2017, 12:16:04 PM »
Could she mixed up the idea of a 'rental' with 'lease' and '200$/week' with '200$/month'?  A 200$/month lease is not quite 'dumb' - its far from 'good' but still....

charis

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3219 on: July 12, 2017, 05:05:02 PM »
Could she mixed up the idea of a 'rental' with 'lease' and '200$/week' with '200$/month'?  A 200$/month lease is not quite 'dumb' - its far from 'good' but still....

I wish this was the explanation, but she has never leased a car and likely has no idea what a lease entails or the costs involved.  I also hadn't yet told her what we spent on the rental when she said that.

paddedhat

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3220 on: July 12, 2017, 06:30:47 PM »

My perpetually broke and in-debt scumbag sibling and his meal ticket have purchased a house on a beach up in the northern hinterlands of New England. It already needs repairs. I seriously doubt either of them has anything resembling the skills needed to fix it.

Had friends who got caught up in this trap, in rural, no make that remote, coastal Maine. When it's time to sell, find a realtor and drive the sign in the yard on Memorial Day. Hear from the realtor, maybe twice a summer,  "there were a few inquiries, nothing serious though". Pull the sign up after Labor day,  since only your neighbors are driving by, and they're broke too. Rinse and repeat every summer, and hopefully, sometime in the next five or six summers you will end up taking an offer for a hell of a lot less that you "thought" it was worth. By then you are so fucking glad to be unchained that you would of taken 20-30% less than that awful number just to be free of the "dream" you once had.  Add in crushing real estate taxes, an economy that shrivels and dies after the tourists leave, epidemic drug use and poverty guaranteed to be nearby, brutal winters, and friendly neighbors (well once they get to know you, twenty, maybe thirty, years from now) and it sounds like your sibling made a wise choice...............................not really, what the hell were they thinking?

BTDretire

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3221 on: July 12, 2017, 06:43:18 PM »


Obama - smokes, drinks, supports gay and women's rights... WORST MUSLIM EVER!

 Ya, maybe not,
 You probably don't have a TV and missed the news about the Muslims that burned a man alive in a cage or the ones the beheaded infidels. /s/

AnnaGrowsAMustache

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3222 on: July 13, 2017, 02:08:33 AM »


Obama - smokes, drinks, supports gay and women's rights... WORST MUSLIM EVER!

 Ya, maybe not,
 You probably don't have a TV and missed the news about the Muslims that burned a man alive in a cage or the ones the beheaded infidels. /s/

You know that Christians have also done that stuff, right? Heard of the Inquisition? And even at the time of the Inquisition, they did not represent ALL Christians.

shelivesthedream

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3223 on: July 13, 2017, 02:43:39 AM »
Let's get this thread back on track, shall we? Feel free to start a new thread to debate historical Muslim/Christian oppression/aggression. Anyone got any relatives who just don't get it?

Guava

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3224 on: July 13, 2017, 06:45:31 AM »
Let's get this thread back on track, shall we? Feel free to start a new thread to debate historical Muslim/Christian oppression/aggression. Anyone got any relatives who just don't get it?

My cousins baby dady (21 years old or so) drove 10 hours to buy a new Mustang with illegal tint on the Windows. It's 2 doors. We live in a state that gets snow 6+ months sometimes. He now has to buy a winter truck. He told me he can't afford to buy diapers.

paddedhat

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3225 on: July 13, 2017, 06:59:08 AM »
Let's get this thread back on track, shall we? Feel free to start a new thread to debate historical Muslim/Christian oppression/aggression. Anyone got any relatives who just don't get it?

My cousins baby dady (21 years old or so) drove 10 hours to buy a new Mustang with illegal tint on the Windows. It's 2 doors. We live in a state that gets snow 6+ months sometimes. He now has to buy a winter truck. He told me he can't afford to buy diapers.

In a past life I used to have lots of freshly minted new trade apprentices working for me. For the first time in their lives they were making decent money, and being young, male and dumb, some of them just "needed" a cool car. More than once, junior would be late on the first snowy day, and show up looking a bit pale,  since their new V8 rear wheel drive Mustang was less than useless in the snow........ Being cool can be a bitch.

Fi(re) on the Farm

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3226 on: July 13, 2017, 07:13:45 AM »
My cousin, who with her husband makes pretty good money but has to buy the big house, take the best trips and is in debt up to her eyebrows, just bought a new car. She timed her purchase so that she paid off her old car and bought the new car at the same time so she would continue to have a car payment because "it was good to stay in the habit" of having to make a monthly payment!

Vindicated

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3227 on: July 13, 2017, 07:19:36 AM »
Talked to my parents last night, they said "Come over tomorrow after work and buy some stuff for us on your Amazon account.  We'll pay for it, but we don't have Prime."   I think to myself, Alright! I can have them pay me cash, then use my Amazon Chase card, and I'll get 20% of the purchases back in reward points on Prime day, heck yeah!.  I don't say that though.  I ask, "What do you guys need to buy?"  My Dad says, "I want to get a TV."  Me, "For where?  Is something wrong with your TV?" (they currently have a pretty nice and large TV, and I think it's only 2 years old).  My Dad, "No, I just want a 4K TV."  Ugh.

To add to this, I know they have several thousand dollars in credit card debt, and my Dad said they're behind on their savings this year since he hasn't worked as much as a usual year.

So, now, do I just "forget" to stop by, and see if they forget too?  Or do I go, and try to prevent them from doing too much damage?

Well, I quite literally forgot.  My parents never called or anything, so they managed to survive Prime day.  Woohoo!

Ann

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3228 on: July 13, 2017, 07:52:48 AM »
My cousin, who with her husband makes pretty good money but has to buy the big house, take the best trips and is in debt up to her eyebrows, just bought a new car. She timed her purchase so that she paid off her old car and bought the new car at the same time so she would continue to have a car payment because "it was good to stay in the habit" of having to make a monthly payment!
OMG I have heard that exact same argument!!
Why can't you "stay in the habit" by transferring that exact same amount into a savings account?  (Or most Mustachianly, a 401K/Roth IRA/brokerage account).
My friend was feeling the need to trade in her car before it "really starts to depreciate" (like her boyfriend said).  I guess, in retrospect, if you ARE going to trade it in it is better to do it a month before the warranty is up rather than a month after.  But, in general, it is more financially beneficial to hold on to a quality car than to buy new.  Basically I tried to emphasis -- don't just do what your boyfriend says -- don't just do what I say -- research it a little on your own before you say that older cars depreciate faster.
She said that even if it was a better financial decision, she didn't want to get used to not having a car payment.  (Oh, and she really does like new technology that comes with new cars but I wasn't bothered by that reasoning).

JordanOfGilead

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3229 on: July 13, 2017, 08:33:21 AM »
My cousin, who with her husband makes pretty good money but has to buy the big house, take the best trips and is in debt up to her eyebrows, just bought a new car. She timed her purchase so that she paid off her old car and bought the new car at the same time so she would continue to have a car payment because "it was good to stay in the habit" of having to make a monthly payment!
OMG I have heard that exact same argument!!
Why can't you "stay in the habit" by transferring that exact same amount into a savings account?  (Or most Mustachianly, a 401K/Roth IRA/brokerage account).
My friend was feeling the need to trade in her car before it "really starts to depreciate" (like her boyfriend said).  I guess, in retrospect, if you ARE going to trade it in it is better to do it a month before the warranty is up rather than a month after.  But, in general, it is more financially beneficial to hold on to a quality car than to buy new.  Basically I tried to emphasis -- don't just do what your boyfriend says -- don't just do what I say -- research it a little on your own before you say that older cars depreciate faster.
She said that even if it was a better financial decision, she didn't want to get used to not having a car payment.  (Oh, and she really does like new technology that comes with new cars but I wasn't bothered by that reasoning).
That's funny, because everything I have seen shows the majority of depreciation happening during the first 5 -7 years after manufacture, then prices tend to level out until the 12-15 year mark or so. After 15 years it all depends on condition and mileage and given that most people don't maintain their cars very well, it appears that they "depreciate" faster at that point, when in reality the value only drops because it wasn't taken care of.

Warlord1986

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3230 on: July 13, 2017, 11:27:44 AM »

My perpetually broke and in-debt scumbag sibling and his meal ticket have purchased a house on a beach up in the northern hinterlands of New England. It already needs repairs. I seriously doubt either of them has anything resembling the skills needed to fix it.

Had friends who got caught up in this trap, in rural, no make that remote, coastal Maine. When it's time to sell, find a realtor and drive the sign in the yard on Memorial Day. Hear from the realtor, maybe twice a summer,  "there were a few inquiries, nothing serious though". Pull the sign up after Labor day,  since only your neighbors are driving by, and they're broke too. Rinse and repeat every summer, and hopefully, sometime in the next five or six summers you will end up taking an offer for a hell of a lot less that you "thought" it was worth. By then you are so fucking glad to be unchained that you would of taken 20-30% less than that awful number just to be free of the "dream" you once had.  Add in crushing real estate taxes, an economy that shrivels and dies after the tourists leave, epidemic drug use and poverty guaranteed to be nearby, brutal winters, and friendly neighbors (well once they get to know you, twenty, maybe thirty, years from now) and it sounds like your sibling made a wise choice...............................not really, what the hell were they thinking?

I don't think it's in Maine. Either New Hampshire or Rhode Island. Somewhere cold.

My sibling does not think. He did not think when he dropped out of high school, he did not think when he threw a temper tantrum and quit his job ten years ago, he did not think when he was hiking the Appalachian Trail and threw away his gear, he did not think when he was a career student for...God, 15 years? 20? IDK. And I seriously doubt he has ever thought about any purchase he has ever made. This house purchase is the latest in a long series of poor choices made without the benefit of applying his God-given intellect. However, my parents are joyful because their forty year old teenager has taken the adult step of purchasing a house that needs upgrades and that, should his meal ticket disappear from the equation, he has no way of affording because he has not held a job for a decade.

TheGrimSqueaker

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3231 on: July 13, 2017, 12:15:22 PM »

My perpetually broke and in-debt scumbag sibling and his meal ticket have purchased a house on a beach up in the northern hinterlands of New England. It already needs repairs. I seriously doubt either of them has anything resembling the skills needed to fix it.

Had friends who got caught up in this trap, in rural, no make that remote, coastal Maine. When it's time to sell, find a realtor and drive the sign in the yard on Memorial Day. Hear from the realtor, maybe twice a summer,  "there were a few inquiries, nothing serious though". Pull the sign up after Labor day,  since only your neighbors are driving by, and they're broke too. Rinse and repeat every summer, and hopefully, sometime in the next five or six summers you will end up taking an offer for a hell of a lot less that you "thought" it was worth. By then you are so fucking glad to be unchained that you would of taken 20-30% less than that awful number just to be free of the "dream" you once had.  Add in crushing real estate taxes, an economy that shrivels and dies after the tourists leave, epidemic drug use and poverty guaranteed to be nearby, brutal winters, and friendly neighbors (well once they get to know you, twenty, maybe thirty, years from now) and it sounds like your sibling made a wise choice...............................not really, what the hell were they thinking?

I don't think it's in Maine. Either New Hampshire or Rhode Island. Somewhere cold.

My sibling does not think. He did not think when he dropped out of high school, he did not think when he threw a temper tantrum and quit his job ten years ago, he did not think when he was hiking the Appalachian Trail and threw away his gear, he did not think when he was a career student for...God, 15 years? 20? IDK. And I seriously doubt he has ever thought about any purchase he has ever made. This house purchase is the latest in a long series of poor choices made without the benefit of applying his God-given intellect. However, my parents are joyful because their forty year old teenager has taken the adult step of purchasing a house that needs upgrades and that, should his meal ticket disappear from the equation, he has no way of affording because he has not held a job for a decade.

Now this sounds like a good story, more than fitting for the Wall of Shame and Comedy. Would you care to expand on it for our entertainment?

BTDretire

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3232 on: July 13, 2017, 12:59:41 PM »


Obama - smokes, drinks, supports gay and women's rights... WORST MUSLIM EVER!

 Ya, maybe not,
 You probably don't have a TV and missed the news about the Muslims that burned a man alive in a cage or the ones the beheaded infidels. /s/

You know that Christians have also done that stuff, right? Heard of the Inquisition? And even at the time of the Inquisition, they did not represent ALL Christians.
Let's compare what what Christians and Muslims are doing today,
I'm living today. Yes, it is not all.

solon

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3233 on: July 13, 2017, 01:07:14 PM »


Obama - smokes, drinks, supports gay and women's rights... WORST MUSLIM EVER!

 Ya, maybe not,
 You probably don't have a TV and missed the news about the Muslims that burned a man alive in a cage or the ones the beheaded infidels. /s/

You know that Christians have also done that stuff, right? Heard of the Inquisition? And even at the time of the Inquisition, they did not represent ALL Christians.
Let's compare what what Christians and Muslims are doing today,
I'm living today. Yes, it is not all.

No. Take this religio-political garbage somewhere else. You're spoiling a lot of people's fun here. Knock it off. All of you.

nwhiker

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3234 on: July 13, 2017, 01:13:54 PM »
Where to start with my family. I've got stories for days.

My sister who had one child at the time drove a Yukon. Note her husband had a truck so there was no need for a large SUV. Well when she was pregnant with her second kid she thought the Yukon was going to small and got a larger Nissan Armada.

Growing up we didn't have a lot of money but my Mom wanted to buy a new couch. Nothing wrong with the old one but it was time for a change according to her. My stepdad said that we didn't have the money at the time and that the credit cards were maxed out. So while he was on the road working she asked my Grandfather to buy the couch for her. When my stepdad got home she wouldn't let him sit in it because it was "her" couch.

marielle

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3235 on: July 13, 2017, 01:56:56 PM »
My sister who had one child at the time drove a Yukon. Note her husband had a truck so there was no need for a large SUV. Well when she was pregnant with her second kid she thought the Yukon was going to small and got a larger Nissan Armada.

7 seats for four people, two of which are tiny. Makes perfect sense.

TheGrimSqueaker

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3236 on: July 14, 2017, 12:54:48 AM »
My sister who had one child at the time drove a Yukon. Note her husband had a truck so there was no need for a large SUV. Well when she was pregnant with her second kid she thought the Yukon was going to small and got a larger Nissan Armada.

7 seats for four people, two of which are tiny. Makes perfect sense.
I've got it on fairly good authority that no pregnant woman feels tiny. There's apparently something about the 24x7 sensation of one's innards exploding that makes a person desire space.

Playing with Fire UK

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3237 on: July 14, 2017, 04:14:37 AM »
Growing up we didn't have a lot of money but my Mom wanted to buy a new couch. Nothing wrong with the old one but it was time for a change according to her. My stepdad said that we didn't have the money at the time and that the credit cards were maxed out. So while he was on the road working she asked my Grandfather to buy the couch for her. When my stepdad got home she wouldn't let him sit in it because it was "her" couch.

The idea of an adult going to a parent to replace a perfectly serviceable piece of furniture and then having the audacity to claim that their partner mayn't sit on it because it is "hers". Fantastic. It does conjure up a mental image of the poor partner having to sit on the floor like a bad dog because the "old" couch has been thrown out. I'd struggle if that were my relationship and our values were so different.

Warlord1986

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3238 on: July 14, 2017, 06:47:47 AM »

My perpetually broke and in-debt scumbag sibling and his meal ticket have purchased a house on a beach up in the northern hinterlands of New England. It already needs repairs. I seriously doubt either of them has anything resembling the skills needed to fix it.

Had friends who got caught up in this trap, in rural, no make that remote, coastal Maine. When it's time to sell, find a realtor and drive the sign in the yard on Memorial Day. Hear from the realtor, maybe twice a summer,  "there were a few inquiries, nothing serious though". Pull the sign up after Labor day,  since only your neighbors are driving by, and they're broke too. Rinse and repeat every summer, and hopefully, sometime in the next five or six summers you will end up taking an offer for a hell of a lot less that you "thought" it was worth. By then you are so fucking glad to be unchained that you would of taken 20-30% less than that awful number just to be free of the "dream" you once had.  Add in crushing real estate taxes, an economy that shrivels and dies after the tourists leave, epidemic drug use and poverty guaranteed to be nearby, brutal winters, and friendly neighbors (well once they get to know you, twenty, maybe thirty, years from now) and it sounds like your sibling made a wise choice...............................not really, what the hell were they thinking?

I don't think it's in Maine. Either New Hampshire or Rhode Island. Somewhere cold.

My sibling does not think. He did not think when he dropped out of high school, he did not think when he threw a temper tantrum and quit his job ten years ago, he did not think when he was hiking the Appalachian Trail and threw away his gear, he did not think when he was a career student for...God, 15 years? 20? IDK. And I seriously doubt he has ever thought about any purchase he has ever made. This house purchase is the latest in a long series of poor choices made without the benefit of applying his God-given intellect. However, my parents are joyful because their forty year old teenager has taken the adult step of purchasing a house that needs upgrades and that, should his meal ticket disappear from the equation, he has no way of affording because he has not held a job for a decade.

Now this sounds like a good story, more than fitting for the Wall of Shame and Comedy. Would you care to expand on it for our entertainment?

My then 18-year-old brother decided he wanted to hike the Appalachian Trail. Fine, said Daddy. It'll be good for you. I'll outfit you with gear. Here's a LL Bean catalog.

So we drop him off along the trail and wave goodbye. A few weeks later we get a call. He needs money. Daddy asks why.

Sibling got tired of hiking, hitched a ride with some people he met, and left all his stuff on the side of the road.

cavewoman

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3239 on: July 14, 2017, 07:29:12 AM »
My mom used to REALLY not get it, and waste all her money on drugs, drinking, and getting married (5 times to 4 men in 10 years?).

About 15 years ago, she cleaned up and has at least held a job steadily.  7 years ago she married a man from Louisiana.  They bought a house 5 years ago, and all seemed well.

Until, StepDad (SD) lost his job.  He was working for a lumber yard, and apparently told the owner to F*ck off regarding some delivery he didn't want to do.  Well that's ok, he was getting old and it was hard to do that job anyway.  He'll just apply for disability.  (This was 5 years ago... and it's well known that the process for disability can be very long and drawn out, even for people who truly cannot work anymore.  Not the case for SD, I mean I don't doubt that his back was no longer cut out for lifting wood, but the man could have gotten a job)

But still, I thought things would be OK.  My mom had a steady job, and their mortgage payment was about $400.  They still went out to eat and smoked and had full cable package, so things couldn't be that bad, right?

Would I be here if that were so?

My mom and I don't talk much, but in a recent conversation she revealed to me that they had just stopped paying when SD lost his job.  But no worries, because they got approved for a HUD relief program and that is going to kick in, and plus SD's disability is finally going through next month.  The biggest kicker was the reason she tried to give for not paying: "Well, our mortgage company was changed 5 times and 4 years and we were just jerked around"

Well, mom, I'm pretty sure when the company changes you just send your check to the new address, but OK, I'm not gonna get into that with you, not a chance. 

SD also says he is "helping" my dad out with his rental properties, but in reality my dad pays SD because he feels sorry for them and then later bitches about how little work SD actually gets done.

merula

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3240 on: July 14, 2017, 08:59:03 AM »
ftp://My sibling does not think. He did not think when he dropped out of high school, he did not think when he threw a temper tantrum and quit his job ten years ago, he did not think when he was hiking the Appalachian Trail and threw away his gear, he did not think when he was a career student for...God, 15 years? 20? IDK. And I seriously doubt he has ever thought about any purchase he has ever made. This house purchase is the latest in a long series of poor choices made without the benefit of applying his God-given intellect. However, my parents are joyful because their forty year old teenager has taken the adult step of purchasing a house that needs upgrades and that, should his meal ticket disappear from the equation, he has no way of affording because he has not held a job for a decade.

Now this sounds like a good story, more than fitting for the Wall of Shame and Comedy. Would you care to expand on it for our entertainment?

My then 18-year-old brother decided he wanted to hike the Appalachian Trail. Fine, said Daddy. It'll be good for you. I'll outfit you with gear. Here's a LL Bean catalog.

So we drop him off along the trail and wave goodbye. A few weeks later we get a call. He needs money. Daddy asks why.

Sibling got tired of hiking, hitched a ride with some people he met, and left all his stuff on the side of the road.

I was thinking it was a euphemistic "hiking the Appalachian trail" a la Mark Sanford. That was funny, this is just ridiculous and sad.

zolotiyeruki

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3241 on: July 14, 2017, 10:30:33 AM »
My sister who had one child at the time drove a Yukon. Note her husband had a truck so there was no need for a large SUV. Well when she was pregnant with her second kid she thought the Yukon was going to small and got a larger Nissan Armada.
Ah, the Nissan Armada.  A vehicle whose name appropriately describes its dimensions.  See also the Ford Expedition.

RWD

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3242 on: July 14, 2017, 11:22:30 AM »
My sister who had one child at the time drove a Yukon. Note her husband had a truck so there was no need for a large SUV. Well when she was pregnant with her second kid she thought the Yukon was going to small and got a larger Nissan Armada.
Ah, the Nissan Armada.  A vehicle whose name appropriately describes its dimensions.  See also the Ford Expedition.
Also has one of the highest total cost to own of any vehicle.
http://www.msn.com/en-us/autos/research/cars-with-the-highest-ownership-costs/ss-BBhO9n6#image=11

nwhiker

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3243 on: July 14, 2017, 02:06:07 PM »
Growing up we didn't have a lot of money but my Mom wanted to buy a new couch. Nothing wrong with the old one but it was time for a change according to her. My stepdad said that we didn't have the money at the time and that the credit cards were maxed out. So while he was on the road working she asked my Grandfather to buy the couch for her. When my stepdad got home she wouldn't let him sit in it because it was "her" couch.

The idea of an adult going to a parent to replace a perfectly serviceable piece of furniture and then having the audacity to claim that their partner mayn't sit on it because it is "hers". Fantastic. It does conjure up a mental image of the poor partner having to sit on the floor like a bad dog because the "old" couch has been thrown out. I'd struggle if that were my relationship and our values were so different.

Well the relationship tended to be somewhat amicable with long periods of ignoring one another. Then came the yelling and slapping each other, so you wanted them to start ignoring each other again. Eventually he no longer had to deal with the relationship, unfortunately it came about because the authorities discovered he was transporting more than just produce to California on a weekly basis.

nouveauRiche

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3244 on: July 14, 2017, 04:44:12 PM »
unfortunately it came about because the authorities discovered he was transporting more than just produce to California on a weekly basis.

What else?  Meat and diary?  ;)

Why were they short on money then?

zolotiyeruki

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3245 on: July 14, 2017, 09:46:10 PM »
Growing up we didn't have a lot of money but my Mom wanted to buy a new couch. Nothing wrong with the old one but it was time for a change according to her. My stepdad said that we didn't have the money at the time and that the credit cards were maxed out. So while he was on the road working she asked my Grandfather to buy the couch for her. When my stepdad got home she wouldn't let him sit in it because it was "her" couch.

The idea of an adult going to a parent to replace a perfectly serviceable piece of furniture and then having the audacity to claim that their partner mayn't sit on it because it is "hers". Fantastic. It does conjure up a mental image of the poor partner having to sit on the floor like a bad dog because the "old" couch has been thrown out. I'd struggle if that were my relationship and our values were so different.

Well the relationship tended to be somewhat amicable with long periods of ignoring one another. Then came the yelling and slapping each other, so you wanted them to start ignoring each other again. Eventually he no longer had to deal with the relationship, unfortunately it came about because the authorities discovered he was transporting more than just produce to California on a weekly basis.
I was under the impression that transporting produce to CA is frowned upon.  I seem to remember being stopped at a checkpoint on our way into CA (from NV) and being asked if we were carrying produce.

Sibley

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3246 on: July 14, 2017, 09:49:48 PM »
Growing up we didn't have a lot of money but my Mom wanted to buy a new couch. Nothing wrong with the old one but it was time for a change according to her. My stepdad said that we didn't have the money at the time and that the credit cards were maxed out. So while he was on the road working she asked my Grandfather to buy the couch for her. When my stepdad got home she wouldn't let him sit in it because it was "her" couch.

The idea of an adult going to a parent to replace a perfectly serviceable piece of furniture and then having the audacity to claim that their partner mayn't sit on it because it is "hers". Fantastic. It does conjure up a mental image of the poor partner having to sit on the floor like a bad dog because the "old" couch has been thrown out. I'd struggle if that were my relationship and our values were so different.

Well the relationship tended to be somewhat amicable with long periods of ignoring one another. Then came the yelling and slapping each other, so you wanted them to start ignoring each other again. Eventually he no longer had to deal with the relationship, unfortunately it came about because the authorities discovered he was transporting more than just produce to California on a weekly basis.
I was under the impression that transporting produce to CA is frowned upon.  I seem to remember being stopped at a checkpoint on our way into CA (from NV) and being asked if we were carrying produce.

Indeed, those checkpoints are there. I never had anything with me, so wasn't an issue.

MgoSam

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3247 on: July 15, 2017, 07:27:43 AM »
Growing up we didn't have a lot of money but my Mom wanted to buy a new couch. Nothing wrong with the old one but it was time for a change according to her. My stepdad said that we didn't have the money at the time and that the credit cards were maxed out. So while he was on the road working she asked my Grandfather to buy the couch for her. When my stepdad got home she wouldn't let him sit in it because it was "her" couch.

The idea of an adult going to a parent to replace a perfectly serviceable piece of furniture and then having the audacity to claim that their partner mayn't sit on it because it is "hers". Fantastic. It does conjure up a mental image of the poor partner having to sit on the floor like a bad dog because the "old" couch has been thrown out. I'd struggle if that were my relationship and our values were so different.

Well the relationship tended to be somewhat amicable with long periods of ignoring one another. Then came the yelling and slapping each other, so you wanted them to start ignoring each other again. Eventually he no longer had to deal with the relationship, unfortunately it came about because the authorities discovered he was transporting more than just produce to California on a weekly basis.
I was under the impression that transporting produce to CA is frowned upon.  I seem to remember being stopped at a checkpoint on our way into CA (from NV) and being asked if we were carrying produce.

Indeed, those checkpoints are there. I never had anything with me, so wasn't an issue.

I haven't heard of this, why is bringing produce into CA a no-no? I mean, California is where a lot of produce is grown so I guess I wouldn't see the point as you can likely buy fresh stuff there.

cavewoman

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3248 on: July 15, 2017, 07:46:13 AM »
I think the issue is more with potential diseases and pests that can travel in - we wouldn't want to ruin the fruit basket of the US!

I remember the first time I came into California when I moved here - I was so nervous when I got stopped, had no idea what they were looking for, and I had some apples and oranges from the hotel breakfast!  They still let me in, though :)

Chesleygirl

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Re: Relatives who just don't get it
« Reply #3249 on: July 15, 2017, 06:09:35 PM »
Maybe I should, but I don't feel sorry for people who spend money like drunken sailors and then wind up broke.