Overheard on Facebook

[Kitsune]

Holy fudge, I am getting a serious "dodged a bullet" sensation right now.

Confirmed: you dodged it. Go you.

Dear lord.

[zephyr911]

Holy fudge, I am getting a serious "dodged a bullet" sensation right now.

Confirmed: you dodged it. Go you.

Dear lord.

I put it this way to DW just now: "she's always had those tendencies, and I swung more that way when we were together, but she's found someone to encourage further excess while I was lucky to meet you"

While the proximate factor in the divorce was my involvement with someone else, our inability to ever balance a budget had left me pretty hopeless about our future together and I didn't feel like I had much to lose. I don't think I ever shared that and I don't think she ever divined it, and I guess maybe the $$ it was never as much of a source of stress for her as long as we still had the things. But good lawd, we were drowning in debt with no end in sight and we couldn't even talk about it, let alone do anything about it.

[Half-Borg]

TWO HOURS AGO:
XDW: "Due to moving and having a hard time finding a place that will allow 3 dogs, I am putting (5-month-old designer pet) up for sale. Help me find her an amazing home. $850"

What kind of person pawns a dog? Seriously WTF?

[zephyr911]

TWO HOURS AGO:
XDW: "Due to moving and having a hard time finding a place that will allow 3 dogs, I am putting (5-month-old designer pet) up for sale. Help me find her an amazing home. $850"

What kind of person pawns a dog? Seriously WTF?

Someone I once planned on spending my whole life with... I dunno mang. She was always rather impulsive but she's gone off the deep end now that the money is better. I get the sense this is the kind of person who could take in a million, many millions, any amount of money, and never get rich. I guess I was the only one dreaming of financial independence... she just wanted the accessories.
I actually put her through real estate school 10 years ago and we bought together, talked about investing together... blows my mind that she's still a renter with so much cash coming in.

[merula]

TWO HOURS AGO:
XDW: "Due to moving and having a hard time finding a place that will allow 3 dogs, I am putting (5-month-old designer pet) up for sale. Help me find her an amazing home. $850"

What kind of person pawns a dog? Seriously WTF?

Come on, do you have any idea how hard it is to find a cheap 5-bedroom rental that's on the water, with a brand-new roof and all the best features including a wine cellar, AND will allow 3 dogs? Cut her some slack.

But yeah, zephyr, you dodged a bullet. You should thank your wandering eyes (and new DW).

[Playing with Fire UK]

Friend2: "You can buy mine for 225...."
XDW: "You're not on the water silly. We're only looking for waterfront"

How rude!!!

[zephyr911]

Come on, do you have any idea how hard it is to find a cheap 5-bedroom rental that's on the water, with a brand-new roof and all the best features including a wine cellar, AND will allow 3 dogs? Cut her some slack.

Truly, I wish her & her family nothing but the best. I just... can't see them actually getting it this way.

But yeah, zephyr, you dodged a bullet. You should thank your wandering eyes (and new DW).

Smartest dumbass move I ever made, amirite? :P

[Half-Borg]

TWO HOURS AGO:
XDW: "Due to moving and having a hard time finding a place that will allow 3 dogs, I am putting (5-month-old designer pet) up for sale. Help me find her an amazing home. $850"

What kind of person pawns a dog? Seriously WTF?

Come on, do you have any idea how hard it is to find a cheap 5-bedroom rental that's on the water, with a brand-new roof and all the best features including a wine cellar, AND will allow 3 dogs? Cut her some slack.

But yeah, zephyr, you dodged a bullet. You should thank your wandering eyes (and new DW).

It would be a lot easier if you only need 4 bedrooms, why not send one of the kids to mine some coal?

[MgoSam]

TWO HOURS AGO:
XDW: "Due to moving and having a hard time finding a place that will allow 3 dogs, I am putting (5-month-old designer pet) up for sale. Help me find her an amazing home. $850"

What kind of person pawns a dog? Seriously WTF?

I do believe Sylvester Stallone did when he was trying to get someone, ANYONE, interested in funding Rocky.

[solon]

TWO HOURS AGO:
XDW: "Due to moving and having a hard time finding a place that will allow 3 dogs, I am putting (5-month-old designer pet) up for sale. Help me find her an amazing home. $850"

What kind of person pawns a dog? Seriously WTF?

How else can you get rid of a dog?

I had to find a new home for my dog when we moved to a place that didn't allow pets.

[gimp]

What kind of person pawns a dog? Seriously WTF?

I do believe Sylvester Stallone did when he was trying to get someone, ANYONE, interested in funding Rocky.

Yeah, but the dude was completely flat broke. He got the dog back ASAP as soon as he had money.

[Warlord1986]

A friend of mine just posted about needing a money tree. A couple of months ago she posted something about how if you type 'Amen' then God will pay your bills.

In between those times she's posted pictures of vacations to Myrtle Beach.

[mustachepungoeshere]

A couple of months ago she posted something about how if you type 'Amen' then God will pay your bills.

>.<

[mustachepungoeshere]

A couple of months ago she posted something about how if you type 'Amen' then God will pay your bills.

>.<

I mean, um, Amen?

[Warlord1986]

A couple of months ago she posted something about how if you type 'Amen' then God will pay your bills.

>.<

That was my response as well. She's a sweetheart, but my God, her money problems give me heartburn. :/

[MgoSam]

What kind of person pawns a dog? Seriously WTF?

I do believe Sylvester Stallone did when he was trying to get someone, ANYONE, interested in funding Rocky.

Yeah, but the dude was completely flat broke. He got the dog back ASAP as soon as he had money.

Yup, I believe he had to pay the guy like 10x the original amount plus promise him a role in Rocky 2.

[Maverick44]

I have a really 'good' one this morning from an old h.s. acquaintance. Part of me feels bad, but most of me is amazed that she screwed herself so badly:

"I overdrafted my bank account $750 to finish my kitchen, plus I borrowed $500 from my boss. Now I'm so broke this month I can't afford to eat or leave the house. After I clean up my bank account and pay back my boss I owe a total of $500 still to the contractor who did the work, and I'm not going to have spending money until way after Christmas, so I can't afford to get my friends and family Christmas presents, which is really shitty of me. Plus I don't think I'll be able to take my vacation in January, which is just making me so depressed this week. Don't get me wrong... it was worth it, I should have just done it over the course of a few months rather than a week. I was just so sick of waiting that I didn't think things through :("

[RWD]

"Don't get me wrong... it was worth it"

Wow, was her kitchen completely non-functional before the work? Because that's the only reason I can think of for it being "worth it"...

[BDWW]

I have a really 'good' one this morning from an old h.s. acquaintance. Part of me feels bad, but most of me is amazed that she screwed herself so badly:

"I overdrafted my bank account $750 to finish my kitchen, plus I borrowed $500 from my boss. Now I'm so broke this month I can't afford to eat or leave the house. After I clean up my bank account and pay back my boss I owe a total of $500 still to the contractor who did the work, and I'm not going to have spending money until way after Christmas, so I can't afford to get my friends and family Christmas presents, which is really shitty of me. Plus I don't think I'll be able to take my vacation in January, which is just making me so depressed this week. Don't get me wrong... it was worth it, I should have just done it over the course of a few months rather than a week. I was just so sick of waiting that I didn't think things through :("

I bet the contractor will be jumping at the opportunity to do more work for her. He's out $500 until after she pays back her overdraft and boss? Who knows how long that will take.

[renata ricotta]

I have a really 'good' one this morning from an old h.s. acquaintance. Part of me feels bad, but most of me is amazed that she screwed herself so badly:

"I overdrafted my bank account $750 to finish my kitchen, plus I borrowed $500 from my boss. Now I'm so broke this month I can't afford to eat or leave the house. After I clean up my bank account and pay back my boss I owe a total of $500 still to the contractor who did the work, and I'm not going to have spending money until way after Christmas, so I can't afford to get my friends and family Christmas presents, which is really shitty of me. Plus I don't think I'll be able to take my vacation in January, which is just making me so depressed this week. Don't get me wrong... it was worth it, I should have just done it over the course of a few months rather than a week. I was just so sick of waiting that I didn't think things through :("

Dear god. It also sounds like she chose the worst possible forms of debt to go into - bank overdrafts and your boss?! Anyone in their right mind would put it on a 35% credit card before either of those options. Which probably means her consumer credit was already shot to hell/maxed out.

[TheGrimSqueaker]

I have a really 'good' one this morning from an old h.s. acquaintance. Part of me feels bad, but most of me is amazed that she screwed herself so badly:

"I overdrafted my bank account $750 to finish my kitchen, plus I borrowed $500 from my boss. Now I'm so broke this month I can't afford to eat or leave the house. After I clean up my bank account and pay back my boss I owe a total of $500 still to the contractor who did the work, and I'm not going to have spending money until way after Christmas, so I can't afford to get my friends and family Christmas presents, which is really shitty of me. Plus I don't think I'll be able to take my vacation in January, which is just making me so depressed this week. Don't get me wrong... it was worth it, I should have just done it over the course of a few months rather than a week. I was just so sick of waiting that I didn't think things through :("

Dear god. It also sounds like she chose the worst possible forms of debt to go into - bank overdrafts and your boss?! Anyone in their right mind would put it on a 35% credit card before either of those options. Which probably means her consumer credit was already shot to hell/maxed out.

Or she never applied for any or has no idea how to use it. However if she has a kitchen it kind of suggests that she somehow owns a home.

Realistically this disaster has got to be just the latest in a long string of bad financial decisions.

[mustachepungoeshere]

I have a really 'good' one this morning from an old h.s. acquaintance. Part of me feels bad, but most of me is amazed that she screwed herself so badly:

"I overdrafted my bank account $750 to finish my kitchen, plus I borrowed $500 from my boss. Now I'm so broke this month I can't afford to eat or leave the house. After I clean up my bank account and pay back my boss I owe a total of $500 still to the contractor who did the work, and I'm not going to have spending money until way after Christmas, so I can't afford to get my friends and family Christmas presents, which is really shitty of me. Plus I don't think I'll be able to take my vacation in January, which is just making me so depressed this week. Don't get me wrong... it was worth it, I should have just done it over the course of a few months rather than a week. I was just so sick of waiting that I didn't think things through :("

What are the comments like?

[renata ricotta]

Realistically this disaster has got to be just the latest in a long string of bad financial decisions.

Wholeheartedly agree. You don't have to be mustachian, or anywhere near it, to recognize this as a hot mess.

[Dicey]

I don't do FB, so I don't recall ever reading anything on this thread. Randomly just decided to check it out. Oof, the story maverick44 shared is the first one I've read and it literally made my stomach lurch. I'm definitely not up for this level of stupidity. I just can't stand it.

[Playing with Fire UK]

Diane C, if you delete your post before anyone quotes it, this thread will stop coming up on your replies list.

I love this thread, sometimes to remind me how far I've come and sometimes as to counteract all the shit I get from people for not being spendy.

[Freedom Invested]

I don't do FB, so I don't recall ever reading anything on this thread.

I deleted my Facebook account years ago and never looked back. It's been linked to unhappiness due to comparing to others; especially when posting and awaiting approval. Additionally it is giving away personal data to those that primarily want to monetize it.

Forgive me if I think we should all want to keep more meaningful relationships elsewhere.

Regardless, I find these FB posts saddening, encouraging (due to not falling into the traps), and enlightening as there is more facepunching to do.

[Threshkin]

I don't do FB, so I don't recall ever reading anything on this thread.

I deleted my Facebook account years ago and never looked back. It's been linked to unhappiness due to comparing to others; especially when posting and awaiting approval. Additionally it is giving away personal data to those that primarily want to monetize it.

...

I am not active on FB but it has helped me stay in touch with old classmates, more distant relatives and previous coworkers that I like.  It is an easy way to keep these relationships from completely fading away.

[flamingo25]

I'm on a "Buy Nothing" group for my neighborhood. It's hip as shit. It's hella fun. Join one.

There is this lady who is either bullshitting everyone, moderately crazy, or awfully crafted at her game.

She comments on a good 1/4 of the all posts, and all her own posts are asks, not gives. The last ask was a K-cup coffee maker to make hot cocoa for her son. Every other variation of her messages reminds everyone how she's the most unlucky person in the world.

I adore my Buy Nothing group. Mine recently split into a few smaller groups, but we had one of these people in the old bigger group. She was constantly asking for anything from designer purses to bottles of bleach or dish soap. She would then tell a sob story about how she just started a new job and didn't get paid until the following week. She also begged for nearly everything that was posted by other people.

It was weird and kind of sad.

[AlanStache]

...
I deleted my Facebook account years ago and never looked back. It's been linked to unhappiness due to comparing to others; especially when posting and awaiting approval. Additionally it is giving away personal data to those that primarily want to monetize it.
...

I just looked for a way to disable people from being able to like/comment on what I post but it does not seem to be an option.  It would be interesting to see how I am affected and how what I post changes without the feedback of getting likes/comments from others. 

[geekette]

You can somewhat limit who can see your posts, and also who can reply, but it's pretty deep in the options.

[Freedom Invested]

...
I deleted my Facebook account years ago and never looked back. It's been linked to unhappiness due to comparing to others; especially when posting and awaiting approval. Additionally it is giving away personal data to those that primarily want to monetize it.
...

I just looked for a way to disable people from being able to like/comment on what I post but it does not seem to be an option.  It would be interesting to see how I am affected and how what I post changes without the feedback of getting likes/comments from others.

Interesting, I cannot say for others, but I think I'd feel less like I was competing with other people. The like/comment, and especially like altered how I wrote posts.

[Freedom Invested]

I don't do FB, so I don't recall ever reading anything on this thread.

I deleted my Facebook account years ago and never looked back. It's been linked to unhappiness due to comparing to others; especially when posting and awaiting approval. Additionally it is giving away personal data to those that primarily want to monetize it.

...

I am not active on FB but it has helped me stay in touch with old classmates, more distant relatives and previous coworkers that I like.  It is an easy way to keep these relationships from completely fading away.

True, I cannot claim it is all bad.

And this entertaining thread does exist due to FB.

[Maverick44]

I have a really 'good' one this morning from an old h.s. acquaintance. Part of me feels bad, but most of me is amazed that she screwed herself so badly:

"I overdrafted my bank account $750 to finish my kitchen, plus I borrowed $500 from my boss. Now I'm so broke this month I can't afford to eat or leave the house. After I clean up my bank account and pay back my boss I owe a total of $500 still to the contractor who did the work, and I'm not going to have spending money until way after Christmas, so I can't afford to get my friends and family Christmas presents, which is really shitty of me. Plus I don't think I'll be able to take my vacation in January, which is just making me so depressed this week. Don't get me wrong... it was worth it, I should have just done it over the course of a few months rather than a week. I was just so sick of waiting that I didn't think things through :("

What are the comments like?

The comments are a mix of people saying they understand/ are in the same boat or just "Well, you NEED a kitchen!" (mind you I do not know if there was no other way for her to make food other than this so that part I can't weight in on). 

There is one that says "Get a credit card!" and one sane person that stated: "Yikes! Sounds like you've got yourself in a situation.  Now what you need to do is concentrate on paying your debts and be sure to not let it get any worse. Bad Credit can follow you for years.  As far as Christmas goes, consider giving gifts of your time.  Or make some gifts. I happen to know you're a very talented artist. Friends and family would all appreciate an original sketch! You'll dig yourself out of this, just make sure you learn from this experience!"

The mix of reality check and positivity in that last comment warranted a like from me. Hopefully, she takes it to heart as a horrible learning experience and that having $1750 in savings should be something she needs to have.

[dsmexpat]

A few days ago I saw people insisting that rich people have no business giving advice to people living in poverty because they can't understand or relate to those experiences. I mean sure, on the one hand advice like "take a small loan of a million dollars from your father and buy real estate" probably isn't much help but on the other, restricting your sources for advice on how to handle money exclusively to people who themselves have failed probably isn't a good idea.

[Goldielocks]

Madame Bovary had a post up last week asking for unwanted jewelry so she can make her kid a jewelry box for Christmas.

PS, most of what I gave her was up on a local yardsale site, I don't think she realized I could see her posting in the forum.   So yup, officially done trying to help out Madame Bovary.

Not cool Madame Bovary. Can you call her out on it like 'oh, I notice that your selling a shamrock charm; be strange coincidence I gave you one identical to that, you could pair them together and give them to kid / make more money' and repeat?

Probably, but honestly, if she is putting in the effort to make some cash whatever, I just hope the kid actually gets some of it.  It was a cheap lesson for me to learn.  Back in the beginning up until now, I've honestly felt really bad for her.  And I understand that pretty much all of her current situation is due to her own personal choices but this was someone that I was genuinely very close to throughout high school so I've felt bad for her, I've had a couple of my own god awful years (last year being one of them) so I get that sometimes it feels like you can't stand back up without getting kicked in the nuts again.  I'm done with that now though.

DH has routinely kept telling me I'm a sucker when I reach out to help.  I think between the shunning of the food offerings and now this I'm done feeling bad for her.  So overall, that lesson only cost me a bag of cheap costume jewelry and my time.

i have someone like that in my life right now,  says one thing to your face, and does something completely differently later...  but is in true financial straits with kids, so I keep helping a bit.    It does become a bit more fun, now, that she is able to be on her own feet, to do the reverse to her..  say one thing, then not do it after...   treating her just the same that we treat our acquaintances, in other words...

[mustachepungoeshere]

i have someone like that in my life right now,  says one thing to your face, and does something completely differently later...  but is in true financial straits with kids, so I keep helping a bit.    It does become a bit more fun, now, that she is able to be on her own feet, to do the reverse to her..  say one thing, then not do it after...   treating her just the same that we treat our acquaintances, in other words...

Evil genius!

I'd love to apply this to people in my life. Usually I take pride in not sinking to their level, but I've noticed that with some people, they are not even remotely swayed by me turning them down, they will just move on to their next 'target'.

[VladTheImpaler]

A few days ago I saw people insisting that rich people have no business giving advice to people living in poverty because they can't understand or relate to those experiences. I mean sure, on the one hand advice like "take a small loan of a million dollars from your father and buy real estate" probably isn't much help but on the other, restricting your sources for advice on how to handle money exclusively to people who themselves have failed probably isn't a good idea.

It totally depends if the wealthy person made their own money or if they were given it.
There are a lot wealthy (inherited) folks that couldn't find their way out of a paper bag.
Likewise, there are some poor people who are SLOWLY fighting and clawing their way to FI, by being disciplined and cutting ties with financially dysfunctional friends and family.

[PMG]

Not about money, but those degrading "tag someone" mêmes. I just gently called someone out for posting it on Facebook. I hate conflict, but I just couldn't ignore this one for some reason. So I am hiding out here and working my nerve up to check Facebook again... Or not for a while, because I don't actually have to. Shew.

I feel like I need a dozen cute kitten mêmes to clean my soul.

[dragoncar]

Not about money, but those degrading "tag someone" mêmes. I just gently called someone out for posting it on Facebook. I hate conflict, but I just couldn't ignore this one for some reason. So I am hiding out here and working my nerve up to check Facebook again... Or not for a while, because I don't actually have to. Shew.

I feel like I need a dozen cute kitten mêmes to clean my soul.

First, WTF is a même?  Are you french?  If anything, it's a mēme?

Second, what degrading tag someone meme?

[PMG]

Not about money, but those degrading "tag someone" mêmes. I just gently called someone out for posting it on Facebook. I hate conflict, but I just couldn't ignore this one for some reason. So I am hiding out here and working my nerve up to check Facebook again... Or not for a while, because I don't actually have to. Shew.

I feel like I need a dozen cute kitten mêmes to clean my soul.

First, WTF is a même?  Are you french?  If anything, it's a mēme?

Second, what degrading tag someone meme?

Autocorrect changed meme to même and I was too lazy to fix it.

The memes are made from photos of people who do not fit beauty standards in the States and read things like "Can you tag so and so for me, they aren't returning my calls." They are usually sexualized. They're pretty cruel and being used to shame body, ability, gender, race, etc.

Isn't that all the internet is? And this whole thread is focused on making fun of others.  I ignore a lot but in this case I just couldn't. It's one thing to make fun of a stupid thing someone said.  It's another thing to make fun of a person for being a person.

I'm the stupid one in this scenario because I opened my mouth (and because I let autocorrect do it's thing, thanks Dragoncar). Surprisingly there has been no backlash on Facebook yet.

[Primm]

Not about money, but those degrading "tag someone" mêmes. I just gently called someone out for posting it on Facebook. I hate conflict, but I just couldn't ignore this one for some reason. So I am hiding out here and working my nerve up to check Facebook again... Or not for a while, because I don't actually have to. Shew.

I feel like I need a dozen cute kitten mêmes to clean my soul.

First, WTF is a même?  Are you french?  If anything, it's a mēme?

Second, what degrading tag someone meme?

Autocorrect changed meme to même and I was too lazy to fix it.

The memes are made from photos of people who do not fit beauty standards in the States and read things like "Can you tag so and so for me, they aren't returning my calls." They are usually sexualized. They're pretty cruel and being used to shame body, ability, gender, race, etc.

Isn't that all the internet is? And this whole thread is focused on making fun of others.  I ignore a lot but in this case I just couldn't. It's one thing to make fun of a stupid thing someone said.  It's another thing to make fun of a person for being a person.

I'm the stupid one in this scenario because I opened my mouth (and because I let autocorrect do it's thing, thanks Dragoncar). Surprisingly there has been no backlash on Facebook yet.

I've heard about this and gone looking (and agree, it's sexist and demeaning and pathetic). But either I have a great bunch of friends or they all realise what the backlash would be if they did this with my knowledge, because not one of the people I'm friends with on FB has actually ever posted or been tagged in one of these things.

[dragoncar]

Sorry I still have no idea what this is.  I guess im lucky but out of morbid curiousoty can you post an example?

[Penny McSave]

Something like this?

[shelivesthedream]

Wow, and people actually tag their "friends" in these pictures?

[nnls]

I assumed they meant these ones, if you are on facebook and just type "i'm looking for" there is a whole page where someone makes them with just about every name imaginable. I have seen heaps in my news feed the last few days

[LeRainDrop]

What the hell?  A few of you sure have some mean-ass friends!

[Warlord1986]

Really. That's pretty horrible.

[HappierAtHome]

I assumed they meant these ones, if you are on facebook and just type "i'm looking for" there is a whole page where someone makes them with just about every name imaginable. I have seen heaps in my news feed the last few days

A few of my cousins have just posted saying that they will unfriend anyone who shares or likes these memes. Good on them!

[economista]

A lot of my family members and friends from high school are posting those and they make me upset every time I see them.  My news feed has been full of them all weekend and it doesn't surprise me at all that the people posting them are the same ones that have been filling up my feed with pro-trump garbage for the past 6 months.  They are obviously people who don't care about others.  I've been contemplating making a post about how awful it is and how you are an awful person if you participate, but I don't want to end up in a fight.  I'm going to approach it like I did the political stuff, and just ignore it all.

[Papa Mustache]

Just quit Facebook and let the mean people have it to themselves.