Overheard on Facebook

[coolistdude]

There is a person on my facebook who really fits that proverb about how people in their 20s try mimic their parents lifestyle while failing to recognise that they're seeing the accumulation of their parents accomplishments across several decades.

I'm pretty sure I've written about her in one of these threads before, because it was really irritating watching her get what could have been an awesome life on hand-delivered to her on a platter... then see her piss it up a wall.  I ended up downgrading her from 'friend' to 'acquaintance' because it was just too much for me, especially when it became clear she valued 'stuff' over people.  Except now all the chickens are coming home to roost and the end result is not pretty.

She's crying poor on facebook because she bought way too much car, house and pet for her income and I'm just cringing.  I did say a few words of caution way back (before I was into MMM/before she bought the car) and was labelled a 'hater' for my trouble. 

I can't say I'm taking any satisfaction in being right.  It's sad that she's made a bunch of huge financial mistakes in her early 20s that will probably haunt her well into her 30s.  It's all kind of awkward, because her life is falling apart just as mine is taking off, and I know she bristles at the successes of others she perceives as 'less deserving' than her.  You could almost say she was one of those 'haters' she accused me of being all those years ago.

Karma's a bitch, eh?

Oh no, that isn't Karma...clearly that is OP being a hater. Couldn't be anything else. Certainly not bad decisions catching up!

[coin]

There is a person on my facebook who really fits that proverb about how people in their 20s try mimic their parents lifestyle while failing to recognise that they're seeing the accumulation of their parents accomplishments across several decades.

I'm pretty sure I've written about her in one of these threads before, because it was really irritating watching her get what could have been an awesome life on hand-delivered to her on a platter... then see her piss it up a wall.  I ended up downgrading her from 'friend' to 'acquaintance' because it was just too much for me, especially when it became clear she valued 'stuff' over people.  Except now all the chickens are coming home to roost and the end result is not pretty.

She's crying poor on facebook because she bought way too much car, house and pet for her income and I'm just cringing.  I did say a few words of caution way back (before I was into MMM/before she bought the car) and was labelled a 'hater' for my trouble. 

I can't say I'm taking any satisfaction in being right.  It's sad that she's made a bunch of huge financial mistakes in her early 20s that will probably haunt her well into her 30s.  It's all kind of awkward, because her life is falling apart just as mine is taking off, and I know she bristles at the successes of others she perceives as 'less deserving' than her.  You could almost say she was one of those 'haters' she accused me of being all those years ago.

Karma's a bitch, eh?

Oh no, that isn't Karma...clearly that is OP being a hater. Couldn't be anything else. Certainly not bad decisions catching up!

Yup! And all her successes are entirely resulting from her own efforts.

She somehow managed to find a shovel and dig herself into this huge hole.

For the curious, about the car:  Her parents gave her a car, free and clear. Not a brand new car, but one that was about a year old - so fairly recent. She proceeded to neglect it over the five years I recall her having it - drove like a girl racer, didn't get it serviced regularly, allowed junk to pile up in it so the seats would have weird crap and stains on them, wouldn't get body damage repaired until it cost far more than if she'd just gotten it fixed in the first place.

Her parents paid for a major repair on it (because despite having a well paying job she was always broke) and she sold it a few weeks later (for far less than what it could have been worth had she not neglected it). Then she bought... A mini. An older model with more miles that she had to take a loan out on. Proceeded to do the same thing to that car, except repairs are now far more expensive because the parts have to be imported from further away.

Suggesting that taking out a loan for a car worth 3/5ths (or something equally ridiculous) of her salary at the time made me a hater, of course. How could I possibly know more than her?

(Ok that was all very cathartic)

I got engaged last week and from what I hear she's fuming that I'm "beating" her. She seems to think life is a competition, and she should be winning. It's very sad, it must be so hard going through life with that sort of mentality. I suspect if she knew about my pursuit of FI and what my life looks like these days, she'd have an aneurysm or something. So... I keep a low profile and avoid where possible.

[maco]

I got engaged last week and from what I hear she's fuming that I'm "beating" her. She seems to think life is a competition, and she should be winning. It's very sad, it must be so hard going through life with that sort of mentality. I suspect if she knew about my pursuit of FI and what my life looks like these days, she'd have an aneurysm or something. So... I keep a low profile and avoid where possible.

On THAT note:

One day, shortly after my step-sister closed on her house, my phone showed missed calls from both my dad and my step-mom. When I called back to find out what's up, it turned out they were arguing over what year I bought my house. Dad, however phrased his question "how old were you when you bought the house?" She thought I'd bought it one year later, a few months before turning 26. But no, I bought it when I was 24, a few months before turning 25. Her daughter bought hers a few months after turning 25. They were being competitive about whose kid bought a house youngest.

[onlykelsey]

I just saw this sentence and  nearly spit out my water. "I got engaged last week and from what I hear she's fuming that I'm "beating" her."

Glad to hear you don't have a fiancee you're beating, haha.

[Friar]

I got engaged last week and from what I hear she's fuming that I'm "beating" her. She seems to think life is a competition, and she should be winning. It's very sad, it must be so hard going through life with that sort of mentality. I suspect if she knew about my pursuit of FI and what my life looks like these days, she'd have an aneurysm or something. So... I keep a low profile and avoid where possible.

On THAT note:

One day, shortly after my step-sister closed on her house, my phone showed missed calls from both my dad and my step-mom. When I called back to find out what's up, it turned out they were arguing over what year I bought my house. Dad, however phrased his question "how old were you when you bought the house?" She thought I'd bought it one year later, a few months before turning 26. But no, I bought it when I was 24, a few months before turning 25. Her daughter bought hers a few months after turning 25. They were being competitive about whose kid bought a house youngest.

It sounds like a status thing to me. On the bright side at least you "won"!

[Vertical Mode]

I just saw this sentence and  nearly spit out my water. "I got engaged last week and from what I hear she's fuming that I'm "beating" her."

Glad to hear you don't have a fiancee you're beating, haha.

That one caught my attention, too. :-) 2 things for the OP (coin):

1. I bet that was pretty cathartic to write.
2. Congratulations on the engagement!

[coin]

I just saw this sentence and  nearly spit out my water. "I got engaged last week and from what I hear she's fuming that I'm "beating" her."

Glad to hear you don't have a fiancee you're beating, haha.

Re-reading it... Oh dear. D:

And thanks, Vertical Mode!

A conversation I have with my fiance sometimes:
"Race you to sleep"
"I'll beat you to sleep"
"Nooooooooo"
"Wait, what?! ... Oh. No, not like that!"

And maco, that's pretty funny. Your kids achievements - what a thing to be competitive over.

First it's who can build the most impressive sandcastle, then it's who gets the best grades and runs fastest, then it's who gets into the most prestigious school or job, then finally it's your kids achievements? (Is that how it works?)

[golden1]

I guess it is judgemental of me, and I work hard not to be, but I found out that someone I know on a parenting board who has 7 kids, 2 who are autistic, and 1 who has severe special needs and is probably going to need support for the rest of his life had filed bankruptcy 12 years ago, BEFORE she had 5 of those 7 kids.  I just find it hard to get myself in the mindset of thinking "Hey I can't support myself with 2 kids, let's add another 5 to the mix."  They are always struggling financially and seem like they are one major crisis away from bankruptcy again. 

Maybe it is just jealousy in a way, because I decided to stop having kids at 2, partly for financial reasons.  I feel like way too many women who are undecided about having another kid are persuaded to have another and to "follow your heart".  Or "you'll never regret having another kid".  My feeling is a lot of people do regret it but won't admit it. 

[maco]

I guess it is judgemental of me, and I work hard not to be, but I found out that someone I know on a parenting board who has 7 kids, 2 who are autistic, and 1 who has severe special needs and is probably going to need support for the rest of his life had filed bankruptcy 12 years ago, BEFORE she had 5 of those 7 kids.  I just find it hard to get myself in the mindset of thinking "Hey I can't support myself with 2 kids, let's add another 5 to the mix."  They are always struggling financially and seem like they are one major crisis away from bankruptcy again. 

Quiverfulls?

[TheGrimSqueaker]

I guess it is judgemental of me, and I work hard not to be, but I found out that someone I know on a parenting board who has 7 kids, 2 who are autistic, and 1 who has severe special needs and is probably going to need support for the rest of his life had filed bankruptcy 12 years ago, BEFORE she had 5 of those 7 kids.  I just find it hard to get myself in the mindset of thinking "Hey I can't support myself with 2 kids, let's add another 5 to the mix."  They are always struggling financially and seem like they are one major crisis away from bankruptcy again. 

Maybe it is just jealousy in a way, because I decided to stop having kids at 2, partly for financial reasons.  I feel like way too many women who are undecided about having another kid are persuaded to have another and to "follow your heart".  Or "you'll never regret having another kid".  My feeling is a lot of people do regret it but won't admit it.

There's a lot of social pressure to overload the lifeboat. There's a gigantic community of people (in the USA at least) that believes it's always a good idea to add one more kid to your household without having the means to provide for him or her. Their strategy is to hope for the best and to trust in either luck or a character from a Bronze Age fairy tale to provide what they need. When the family almost inevitably runs out of money, resources, or adult attention, the fairy tale character of course never shows up, so the responsibility for cleaning up the mess falls onto the community at large.

Tons of people regret having "just one more", especially if that child has a severe disease, or autism, or a major developmental delay. Not all families have the wherewithal to care for a child who needs a feeding tube or 24x7 supervision, especially when the child reaches his or her teen years. It's not unusual for the stress associated with an extra kid to break up an already fragile marriage that would otherwise have endured. But it's fashionable to pretend that there's "no" extra work or stress associated with having a child or adding a child to a household that's already functioning at, near, or beyond capacity. Anyone who suggests otherwise is treated like a bad person who doesn't "love" the child enough.

In reality, breeding does not magically increase your income or the number of hours in a day. What parents end up with is kids they love, but that they can't care for or provide for in any intelligent way. For what it's worth, the social pressure is not confined to believers in Bronze Age myths. I've seen it in the adoption community too.

[LeRainDrop]

And maco, that's pretty funny. Your kids achievements - what a thing to be competitive over.

First it's who can build the most impressive sandcastle, then it's who gets the best grades and runs fastest, then it's who gets into the most prestigious school or job, then finally it's your kids achievements? (Is that how it works?)

Unfortunately, many people start the competition over kids' achievements as soon as they're born -- each milestone, it's when did your baby first sit, crawl, get a tooth, walk,  talk, potty train, learn to write his name, learn to read, etc.  So many parents get in competitions over their kids' development.  It's too bad.

Edited because I accidentally quoted the wrong comment and have now replaced with the correct comment.

[dycker1978]

I guess it is judgemental of me, and I work hard not to be, but I found out that someone I know on a parenting board who has 7 kids, 2 who are autistic, and 1 who has severe special needs and is probably going to need support for the rest of his life had filed bankruptcy 12 years ago, BEFORE she had 5 of those 7 kids.  I just find it hard to get myself in the mindset of thinking "Hey I can't support myself with 2 kids, let's add another 5 to the mix."  They are always struggling financially and seem like they are one major crisis away from bankruptcy again. 

Maybe it is just jealousy in a way, because I decided to stop having kids at 2, partly for financial reasons.  I feel like way too many women who are undecided about having another kid are persuaded to have another and to "follow your heart".  Or "you'll never regret having another kid".  My feeling is a lot of people do regret it but won't admit it.

Unfortunately, many people start the competition over kids' achievements as soon as they're born -- each milestone, it's when did your baby first sit, crawl, get a tooth, walk,  talk, potty train, learn to write his name, learn to read, etc.  So many parents get in competitions over their kids' development.  It's too bad.

I have two kids, they are both teenagers.  Never mind the money, why the hell would you want more teenagers? 

[Kitsune]

I guess it is judgemental of me, and I work hard not to be, but I found out that someone I know on a parenting board who has 7 kids, 2 who are autistic, and 1 who has severe special needs and is probably going to need support for the rest of his life had filed bankruptcy 12 years ago, BEFORE she had 5 of those 7 kids.  I just find it hard to get myself in the mindset of thinking "Hey I can't support myself with 2 kids, let's add another 5 to the mix."  They are always struggling financially and seem like they are one major crisis away from bankruptcy again. 

Maybe it is just jealousy in a way, because I decided to stop having kids at 2, partly for financial reasons.  I feel like way too many women who are undecided about having another kid are persuaded to have another and to "follow your heart".  Or "you'll never regret having another kid".  My feeling is a lot of people do regret it but won't admit it.

Unfortunately, many people start the competition over kids' achievements as soon as they're born -- each milestone, it's when did your baby first sit, crawl, get a tooth, walk,  talk, potty train, learn to write his name, learn to read, etc.  So many parents get in competitions over their kids' development.  It's too bad.

I have two kids, they are both teenagers.  Never mind the money, why the hell would you want more teenagers?

According to my dad, they are good at shovelling truck-loads of compost, doing dishes, and sulking. Based on vague recollection of my teenage years, he's got a point.

[Kaydedid]

I guess it is judgemental of me, and I work hard not to be, but I found out that someone I know on a parenting board who has 7 kids, 2 who are autistic, and 1 who has severe special needs and is probably going to need support for the rest of his life had filed bankruptcy 12 years ago, BEFORE she had 5 of those 7 kids.  I just find it hard to get myself in the mindset of thinking "Hey I can't support myself with 2 kids, let's add another 5 to the mix."  They are always struggling financially and seem like they are one major crisis away from bankruptcy again. 

Maybe it is just jealousy in a way, because I decided to stop having kids at 2, partly for financial reasons.  I feel like way too many women who are undecided about having another kid are persuaded to have another and to "follow your heart".  Or "you'll never regret having another kid".  My feeling is a lot of people do regret it but won't admit it.

Tons of people regret having "just one more", especially if that child has a severe disease, or autism, or a major developmental delay. Not all families have the wherewithal to care for a child who needs a feeding tube or 24x7 supervision, especially when the child reaches his or her teen years...But it's fashionable to pretend that there's "no" extra work or stress associated with having a child or adding a child to a household that's already functioning at, near, or beyond capacity. Anyone who suggests otherwise is treated like a bad person who doesn't "love" the child enough.

There are so many misconceptions about special needs that are waayyy overblown for most (kid will be miserable, no quality of life, never amount to anything etc.)  Medical science has greatly improved the lives of many people with special needs, but public awareness hasn't caught up yet.  So parents of kids with special needs feel pressure to show that their kids have a good life and accomplish a lot to counteract these messages. You still have awesome days and lousy days just like everyone else. 

On the other hand, having a kid with special needs can be very difficult at times-special needs usually means more needs.  Also more time, more money, more knowledge. Many kids may need (or at least greatly benefit from) big changes like a stay-at-home parent.

A quick plug, Mustachianism has been so incredibly helpful to our special-needs family.  Not only financially (which is huge), but philosophically it's been priceless.  So many disabilities can be seen as tiny details compared to the grand scheme of life.  So, ok, my kid might need a walker or wheelchair, but he'll still get where he needs to go, albeit with a little more creativity and work.  I can't work full time currently due to mental illness, but I can still be a darn good wife and mother, and have a happy life.  Special needs may mean more challenges and hardships, but an easy life doesn't guarantee a good one. 

[TheGrimSqueaker]

I guess it is judgemental of me, and I work hard not to be, but I found out that someone I know on a parenting board who has 7 kids, 2 who are autistic, and 1 who has severe special needs and is probably going to need support for the rest of his life had filed bankruptcy 12 years ago, BEFORE she had 5 of those 7 kids.  I just find it hard to get myself in the mindset of thinking "Hey I can't support myself with 2 kids, let's add another 5 to the mix."  They are always struggling financially and seem like they are one major crisis away from bankruptcy again. 

Maybe it is just jealousy in a way, because I decided to stop having kids at 2, partly for financial reasons.  I feel like way too many women who are undecided about having another kid are persuaded to have another and to "follow your heart".  Or "you'll never regret having another kid".  My feeling is a lot of people do regret it but won't admit it.

Tons of people regret having "just one more", especially if that child has a severe disease, or autism, or a major developmental delay. Not all families have the wherewithal to care for a child who needs a feeding tube or 24x7 supervision, especially when the child reaches his or her teen years...But it's fashionable to pretend that there's "no" extra work or stress associated with having a child or adding a child to a household that's already functioning at, near, or beyond capacity. Anyone who suggests otherwise is treated like a bad person who doesn't "love" the child enough.

There are so many misconceptions about special needs that are waayyy overblown for most (kid will be miserable, no quality of life, never amount to anything etc.)  Medical science has greatly improved the lives of many people with special needs, but public awareness hasn't caught up yet.  So parents of kids with special needs feel pressure to show that their kids have a good life and accomplish a lot to counteract these messages. You still have awesome days and lousy days just like everyone else. 

On the other hand, having a kid with special needs can be very difficult at times-special needs usually means more needs.  Also more time, more money, more knowledge. Many kids may need (or at least greatly benefit from) big changes like a stay-at-home parent.

A quick plug, Mustachianism has been so incredibly helpful to our special-needs family.  Not only financially (which is huge), but philosophically it's been priceless.  So many disabilities can be seen as tiny details compared to the grand scheme of life.  So, ok, my kid might need a walker or wheelchair, but he'll still get where he needs to go, albeit with a little more creativity and work.  I can't work full time currently due to mental illness, but I can still be a darn good wife and mother, and have a happy life.  Special needs may mean more challenges and hardships, but an easy life doesn't guarantee a good one.

There are so many kinds of special needs, though. Based on personal experience, I guarantee there's no such thing as an "awesome" day. FIRE will definitely help.

[Taran Wanderer]

Special needs may mean more challenges and hardships, but an easy life doesn't guarantee a good one.

What a great way to think!  Thank you for your story. Your attitude brought a smile and filled me with gratitude.

[ender]

A quote I read years ago I find particularly insightful:

Before I was paralyzed, there were 10,000 things I could do.  Now there are 9,000.  What should I focus on?  The 1,000 things I can't do?  I prefer to focus on the 9,000 ways life can still be  enjoyable and wonderful.
--W Mitchell

[dragoncar]

Overheard on Yelp:

my wife & I left our 8 yr old retired racing greyhound Lady for 12 days while we took a long over due vacation and cruise, As Lady is used to certain requirements in food and care, we left specific written instructions, along with all the necessary items she needed. As it was cool while we were gone, Lady also had her coat to keep her warm.

Upon our return, we found that Lady had dropped almost 10lbs. She was emaciated! After speaking with the men that took care of her, we found out that they did not feed her in the manner we had left instructions for. This caused her not to eat all of her food and along with leaving her coat on, they did not notice the drop in weight.

When we spoke with management, they claimed no knowledge of the weight loss, and stated that they follow their "normal" feeding procedures. Which was to place Lady in a crate with her food on the floor instead of the raised feeding stand we had provided.

I understand being upset if the kennel agreed to special instructions and didn't follow through, but these people seem like the definition of high maintenance and should probably be looking at a 24/7 dog nanny with bedpan and catheter included

[boyerbt]

Overheard on Yelp:

my wife & I left our 8 yr old retired racing greyhound Lady for 12 days while we took a long over due vacation and cruise, As Lady is used to certain requirements in food and care, we left specific written instructions, along with all the necessary items she needed. As it was cool while we were gone, Lady also had her coat to keep her warm.

Upon our return, we found that Lady had dropped almost 10lbs. She was emaciated! After speaking with the men that took care of her, we found out that they did not feed her in the manner we had left instructions for. This caused her not to eat all of her food and along with leaving her coat on, they did not notice the drop in weight.

When we spoke with management, they claimed no knowledge of the weight loss, and stated that they follow their "normal" feeding procedures. Which was to place Lady in a crate with her food on the floor instead of the raised feeding stand we had provided.

I understand being upset if the kennel agreed to special instructions and didn't follow through, but these people seem like the definition of high maintenance and should probably be looking at a 24/7 dog nanny with bedpan and catheter included

ehh...I disagree. The owners should have had a better idea of the normal schedule and what the kennel was willing to do before dropping off their dog. Since they knew that their dog was rather high maintenance it would have made more sense to use a service like Rover or DogVacay where the dog stays with people who give the dog more attention than at a regular kennel. My girlfriend and I are hosts for one of the aforementioned sites and I can tell you that lots of people have extra requests for their dog's feedings. It's not a big deal for us because we only have 2-6 dogs in the house typically but for a kennel taking care of 25-50 dogs, that is a lot of extra work that they most likely won't do.

[maco]

Overheard on Yelp:

my wife & I left our 8 yr old retired racing greyhound Lady for 12 days while we took a long over due vacation and cruise, As Lady is used to certain requirements in food and care, we left specific written instructions, along with all the necessary items she needed. As it was cool while we were gone, Lady also had her coat to keep her warm.

Upon our return, we found that Lady had dropped almost 10lbs. She was emaciated! After speaking with the men that took care of her, we found out that they did not feed her in the manner we had left instructions for. This caused her not to eat all of her food and along with leaving her coat on, they did not notice the drop in weight.

When we spoke with management, they claimed no knowledge of the weight loss, and stated that they follow their "normal" feeding procedures. Which was to place Lady in a crate with her food on the floor instead of the raised feeding stand we had provided.

I understand being upset if the kennel agreed to special instructions and didn't follow through, but these people seem like the definition of high maintenance and should probably be looking at a 24/7 dog nanny with bedpan and catheter included

I had a great dane that as he got older had to have a raised food dish because he had to bend down to reach one on the floor and couldn't do it when his arthritis got bad The coat may be a bit much, but the raised food dish can definitely be a necessity for tall dogs. Also, 10lbs on a greyhound is huge. They're skinny enough as is. My dane was not quite that narrow and probably a bit taller (I got a runt so not definitely taller) and 10lbs was very noticeable on him

The coat makes sense on a greyhound for walks outdoors in cold weather. They're  a Middle Eastern breed with no down coat, so they don't have a built-in way to stay warm in winter.

[sheepstache]

Overheard on Yelp:

my wife & I left our 8 yr old retired racing greyhound Lady for 12 days while we took a long over due vacation and cruise, As Lady is used to certain requirements in food and care, we left specific written instructions, along with all the necessary items she needed. As it was cool while we were gone, Lady also had her coat to keep her warm.

Upon our return, we found that Lady had dropped almost 10lbs. She was emaciated! After speaking with the men that took care of her, we found out that they did not feed her in the manner we had left instructions for. This caused her not to eat all of her food and along with leaving her coat on, they did not notice the drop in weight.

When we spoke with management, they claimed no knowledge of the weight loss, and stated that they follow their "normal" feeding procedures. Which was to place Lady in a crate with her food on the floor instead of the raised feeding stand we had provided.

I understand being upset if the kennel agreed to special instructions and didn't follow through, but these people seem like the definition of high maintenance and should probably be looking at a 24/7 dog nanny with bedpan and catheter included

I had a great dane that as he got older had to have a raised food dish because he had to bend down to reach one on the floor and couldn't do it when his arthritis got bad The coat may be a bit much, but the raised food dish can definitely be a necessity for tall dogs. Also, 10lbs on a greyhound is huge. They're skinny enough as is. My dane was not quite that narrow and probably a bit taller (I got a runt so not definitely taller) and 10lbs was very noticeable on him

Yeah, if they're correct that the dog wasn't eating all of her food, that sounds like she had problems accessing it without the raised dish, which sucks, although how would they know for sure? I wouldn't be surprised if the kennel just portions out food based on what the dog _ought_ to be eating and the dog lost weight due to eating an actually healthy amount. So many people keep their dogs overweight.

[Gin1984]

Overheard on Yelp:

my wife & I left our 8 yr old retired racing greyhound Lady for 12 days while we took a long over due vacation and cruise, As Lady is used to certain requirements in food and care, we left specific written instructions, along with all the necessary items she needed. As it was cool while we were gone, Lady also had her coat to keep her warm.

Upon our return, we found that Lady had dropped almost 10lbs. She was emaciated! After speaking with the men that took care of her, we found out that they did not feed her in the manner we had left instructions for. This caused her not to eat all of her food and along with leaving her coat on, they did not notice the drop in weight.

When we spoke with management, they claimed no knowledge of the weight loss, and stated that they follow their "normal" feeding procedures. Which was to place Lady in a crate with her food on the floor instead of the raised feeding stand we had provided.

I understand being upset if the kennel agreed to special instructions and didn't follow through, but these people seem like the definition of high maintenance and should probably be looking at a 24/7 dog nanny with bedpan and catheter included

I had a great dane that as he got older had to have a raised food dish because he had to bend down to reach one on the floor and couldn't do it when his arthritis got bad The coat may be a bit much, but the raised food dish can definitely be a necessity for tall dogs. Also, 10lbs on a greyhound is huge. They're skinny enough as is. My dane was not quite that narrow and probably a bit taller (I got a runt so not definitely taller) and 10lbs was very noticeable on him

Yeah, if they're correct that the dog wasn't eating all of her food, that sounds like she had problems accessing it without the raised dish, which sucks, although how would they know for sure? I wouldn't be surprised if the kennel just portions out food based on what the dog _ought_ to be eating and the dog lost weight due to eating an actually healthy amount. So many people keep their dogs overweight.

You can tell with a greyhound.  They are in general very skinny dogs.  And they would also know because they probably were pulling out the food after every meal.  I'd never go to place like that for any pet.

[mm1970]

And maco, that's pretty funny. Your kids achievements - what a thing to be competitive over.

First it's who can build the most impressive sandcastle, then it's who gets the best grades and runs fastest, then it's who gets into the most prestigious school or job, then finally it's your kids achievements? (Is that how it works?)

Unfortunately, many people start the competition over kids' achievements as soon as they're born -- each milestone, it's when did your baby first sit, crawl, get a tooth, walk,  talk, potty train, learn to write his name, learn to read, etc.  So many parents get in competitions over their kids' development.  It's too bad.

Edited because I accidentally quoted the wrong comment and have now replaced with the correct comment.

We are in the midst of all that right now.

[nobodyspecial]

Unfortunately, many people start the competition over kids' achievements as soon as they're born -- each milestone, it's when did your baby first sit, crawl, get a tooth, walk,  talk, potty train, learn to write his name, learn to read, etc.  So many parents get in competitions over their kids' development.  It's too bad.

It's ridiculous how early this starts. When really it's impossible to tell if they are going to be a doctor or a lawyer until at least the 2nd ultrasound scan

[frooglepoodle]

Unfortunately, many people start the competition over kids' achievements as soon as they're born -- each milestone, it's when did your baby first sit, crawl, get a tooth, walk,  talk, potty train, learn to write his name, learn to read, etc.  So many parents get in competitions over their kids' development.  It's too bad.

It's ridiculous how early this starts. When really it's impossible to tell if they are going to be a doctor or a lawyer until at least the 2nd ultrasound scan

Hahaha!

[dragoncar]

Overheard on Yelp:

my wife & I left our 8 yr old retired racing greyhound Lady for 12 days while we took a long over due vacation and cruise, As Lady is used to certain requirements in food and care, we left specific written instructions, along with all the necessary items she needed. As it was cool while we were gone, Lady also had her coat to keep her warm.

Upon our return, we found that Lady had dropped almost 10lbs. She was emaciated! After speaking with the men that took care of her, we found out that they did not feed her in the manner we had left instructions for. This caused her not to eat all of her food and along with leaving her coat on, they did not notice the drop in weight.

When we spoke with management, they claimed no knowledge of the weight loss, and stated that they follow their "normal" feeding procedures. Which was to place Lady in a crate with her food on the floor instead of the raised feeding stand we had provided.

I understand being upset if the kennel agreed to special instructions and didn't follow through, but these people seem like the definition of high maintenance and should probably be looking at a 24/7 dog nanny with bedpan and catheter included

I had a great dane that as he got older had to have a raised food dish because he had to bend down to reach one on the floor and couldn't do it when his arthritis got bad The coat may be a bit much, but the raised food dish can definitely be a necessity for tall dogs. Also, 10lbs on a greyhound is huge. They're skinny enough as is. My dane was not quite that narrow and probably a bit taller (I got a runt so not definitely taller) and 10lbs was very noticeable on him

Yeah, if they're correct that the dog wasn't eating all of her food, that sounds like she had problems accessing it without the raised dish, which sucks, although how would they know for sure? I wouldn't be surprised if the kennel just portions out food based on what the dog _ought_ to be eating and the dog lost weight due to eating an actually healthy amount. So many people keep their dogs overweight.

You can tell with a greyhound.  They are in general very skinny dogs.  And they would also know because they probably were pulling out the food after every meal.  I'd never go to place like that for any pet.

I guess the dog never lays down then, if it can't reach the ground for food.  IMO if a dog isn't eating all its food it's not that hungry.  A dog also doesn't need a coat in an environmentally controlled environment -- and if you do happen to buy a dog that can't be outside in mild California winters then I still say you made an unmustachian purchase.  All your answers are complainypants ... oh no, I got this extremely high-needs dog and no regular kennel will every be good enough for my special snowflake.  If the dog is really that old and sick, then it should probably stay at the animal hospital.

[coin]

As a footnote to my earlier story: the person I was talking about appeared just tonight at a party I was attending. This is after nearly a year of carefully ensuring I wouldn't have to talk to her because I know what she's like when she feels like somebody else's life is going better than hers.

All I can say is - oh dear. Probably a good thing I decided to avoid her. And not rise to her attempts at baiting me.

[MgoSam]

I guess it is judgemental of me, and I work hard not to be

No I disagree, I don't think you're being judgmental. Though I understanding you could feel so.

Maybe it is just jealousy in a way, because I decided to stop having kids at 2, partly for financial reasons.  I feel like way too many women who are undecided about having another kid are persuaded to have another and to "follow your heart".  Or "you'll never regret having another kid".  My feeling is a lot of people do regret it but won't admit it.

Yeah, that's how I feel. I can't say I understand your position as I do not have kids, but I know a ton of people that have kids that they can't afford and then will complain about they are "unlucky," due to a random event, which I don't are all that random (if you have an older house, there is more upkeep required, and must plan for expenses that crop up).

[MgoSam]

I got engaged last week and from what I hear she's fuming that I'm "beating" her. She seems to think life is a competition, and she should be winning.

Well that's your problem. Your friend is still a teenager. It's one thing if she's jealous or if it forces to reflect on her life state, but quite another to think of her life as a competition. Also, what the heck does "winning" even consist of?

[ender]

One of my friends posted "good news: got tax return" and then "bad news: had it for less than a day."

I was prepared to post that here, but it sounds like they used it to pay off a student loan so... I guess it might not fit :)

[coin]

I got engaged last week and from what I hear she's fuming that I'm "beating" her. She seems to think life is a competition, and she should be winning.

Well that's your problem. Your friend is still a teenager. It's one thing if she's jealous or if it forces to reflect on her life state, but quite another to think of her life as a competition. Also, what the heck does "winning" even consist of?

I don't have a complete picture, but from what I can tell, her definition of 'winning' is extremely narrow (and materialistic).

As far as I can tell, it involves owning your own house, driving a luxury vehicle, being married or engaged to a wealthy man who presumably can afford to keep you in this manner, and kids with all the trimmings (idk, they do piano and tennis, I guess?).  And at least one international holiday a year.  That means you're winning.  And designer clothes, italian leather shoes and the latest release video games.

Oh, and TV's.  Gotta have at least two TV's because if you don't you're 'failing at life'.

Not by choice - she was at a party I was attending - but I saw her yesterday.  I've tried to avoid her because (as I said earlier) I know what she's like when she feels like somebody else is doing 'better' than her.  Had I not known her well enough to realise she was all bitter and jealous of me I would have found her antics amusing rather than cringeworthy.  She gave an insincere congratulations on my engagement (the kind laden with backhanded compliments and a mocking tone), and I later overheard her talking about how cars of the make and model I own are pieces of junk and "aren't a real car".  I have a feeling she hoped I overheard that, but... It's funny, I don't recall hearing any of these complaints when I gave her rides in my "junk" car when her "real" car broke down? 

I don't want to be one of those people who laughs at others expense, but this is absolutely ridiculous.  I really don't think my life is 'better', it's just different.  It must really bug her that people value different things. 

I won't lie - this "rivalry" she has made out of thin air really bothers me.  I try to avoid her and keep my social media locked down in the hope she'll stop comparing herself to me, but that hasn't happened so far because we have a lot of mutual friends.  I won't think about her for months, then I run into her and she starts with this weird passive-aggressive social display.  It makes me deeply uncomfortable because feels like I'm an involuntary entrant in some competition of her devising.

[Sibley]

I got engaged last week and from what I hear she's fuming that I'm "beating" her. She seems to think life is a competition, and she should be winning.

Well that's your problem. Your friend is still a teenager. It's one thing if she's jealous or if it forces to reflect on her life state, but quite another to think of her life as a competition. Also, what the heck does "winning" even consist of?

I don't have a complete picture, but from what I can tell, her definition of 'winning' is extremely narrow (and materialistic).

As far as I can tell, it involves owning your own house, driving a luxury vehicle, being married or engaged to a wealthy man who presumably can afford to keep you in this manner, and kids with all the trimmings (idk, they do piano and tennis, I guess?).  And at least one international holiday a year.  That means you're winning.  And designer clothes, italian leather shoes and the latest release video games.

Oh, and TV's.  Gotta have at least two TV's because if you don't you're 'failing at life'.

Not by choice - she was at a party I was attending - but I saw her yesterday.  I've tried to avoid her because (as I said earlier) I know what she's like when she feels like somebody else is doing 'better' than her.  Had I not known her well enough to realise she was all bitter and jealous of me I would have found her antics amusing rather than cringeworthy.  She gave an insincere congratulations on my engagement (the kind laden with backhanded compliments and a mocking tone), and I later overheard her talking about how cars of the make and model I own are pieces of junk and "aren't a real car".  I have a feeling she hoped I overheard that, but... It's funny, I don't recall hearing any of these complaints when I gave her rides in my "junk" car when her "real" car broke down? 

I don't want to be one of those people who laughs at others expense, but this is absolutely ridiculous.  I really don't think my life is 'better', it's just different.  It must really bug her that people value different things. 

I won't lie - this "rivalry" she has made out of thin air really bothers me.  I try to avoid her and keep my social media locked down in the hope she'll stop comparing herself to me, but that hasn't happened so far because we have a lot of mutual friends.  I won't think about her for months, then I run into her and she starts with this weird passive-aggressive social display.  It makes me deeply uncomfortable because feels like I'm an involuntary entrant in some competition of her devising.

Coin, if I were you I'd block her from all social media. You don't need that kind of negativity.

[coolistdude]

I got engaged last week and from what I hear she's fuming that I'm "beating" her. She seems to think life is a competition, and she should be winning.

Well that's your problem. Your friend is still a teenager. It's one thing if she's jealous or if it forces to reflect on her life state, but quite another to think of her life as a competition. Also, what the heck does "winning" even consist of?

I don't have a complete picture, but from what I can tell, her definition of 'winning' is extremely narrow (and materialistic).

As far as I can tell, it involves owning your own house, driving a luxury vehicle, being married or engaged to a wealthy man who presumably can afford to keep you in this manner, and kids with all the trimmings (idk, they do piano and tennis, I guess?).  And at least one international holiday a year.  That means you're winning.  And designer clothes, italian leather shoes and the latest release video games.

Oh, and TV's.  Gotta have at least two TV's because if you don't you're 'failing at life'.

Not by choice - she was at a party I was attending - but I saw her yesterday.  I've tried to avoid her because (as I said earlier) I know what she's like when she feels like somebody else is doing 'better' than her.  Had I not known her well enough to realise she was all bitter and jealous of me I would have found her antics amusing rather than cringeworthy.  She gave an insincere congratulations on my engagement (the kind laden with backhanded compliments and a mocking tone), and I later overheard her talking about how cars of the make and model I own are pieces of junk and "aren't a real car".  I have a feeling she hoped I overheard that, but... It's funny, I don't recall hearing any of these complaints when I gave her rides in my "junk" car when her "real" car broke down? 

I don't want to be one of those people who laughs at others expense, but this is absolutely ridiculous.  I really don't think my life is 'better', it's just different.  It must really bug her that people value different things. 

I won't lie - this "rivalry" she has made out of thin air really bothers me.  I try to avoid her and keep my social media locked down in the hope she'll stop comparing herself to me, but that hasn't happened so far because we have a lot of mutual friends.  I won't think about her for months, then I run into her and she starts with this weird passive-aggressive social display.  It makes me deeply uncomfortable because feels like I'm an involuntary entrant in some competition of her devising.

Coin, if I were you I'd block her from all social media. You don't need that kind of negativity.

+1. Or at least unfriend her. When my ex dumped me, I realized that many of her friends didn't care about me and unfriended them. It doesn't have to be personal, you are simply choosing a happy life and she has been identified as an impediment.

[MgoSam]

Oh, and TV's.  Gotta have at least two TV's because if you don't you're 'failing at life'.

I have one TV and I haven't been abroad in quite a few years (plan to rectify this this year), I guess I'm 'failing.'
/s
[/quote]

I later overheard her talking about how cars of the make and model I own are pieces of junk and "aren't a real car".  I have a feeling she hoped I overheard that, but... It's funny, I don't recall hearing any of these complaints when I gave her rides in my "junk" car when her "real" car broke down? 

I'm sorry that you know someone like this, they are a cancer to those around them. She sounds shallow and insecure, and projects this by trying to minimize you or your accomplishments. I've heard of people being jealous because another person got pregnant before them like it was some kind of race, but I find it just sickening.

[Taran Wanderer]

I have one TV and I haven't been abroad in quite a few years (plan to rectify this this year), I guess I'm 'failing.'

Gee, sucks to be you!  How do you live with yourself?

/sarcasm

[coin]

Coin, if I were you I'd block her from all social media. You don't need that kind of negativity.

+1. Or at least unfriend her. When my ex dumped me, I realized that many of her friends didn't care about me and unfriended them. It doesn't have to be personal, you are simply choosing a happy life and she has been identified as an impediment.

I had her posts hidden and she was on a clean feed on facebook - she couldn't see or comment on most of my posts or pictures.  But, I've blocked her now.  There's not much I can do about our social circles having a significant overlap, so I'm sure some information will filter back to her.  I doubt this will all stop entirely unless I move far away or she realises how silly this all is, but I think I've done my part to stop the vicious cycle.

I'm sorry that you know someone like this, they are a cancer to those around them. She sounds shallow and insecure, and projects this by trying to minimize you or your accomplishments. I've heard of people being jealous because another person got pregnant before them like it was some kind of race, but I find it just sickening.

A (very small) part of me was weirdly pleased that I'm apparently so awesome she sees me as "the competition".  The rest of me feels awkward and annoyed because I'm dead certain I haven't done anything wrong and she only wants to rain on my parade to make herself feel better about whatever is going on in her life.

I've allowed myself today to obsess and rant over it (I've now got a bee in my bonnet about it).  Hopefully by tomorrow she'll be out of my mind, I'll be back to my usual, cheerful self and I can carry on doing my own thing.

Couple of amusing things she's done/said over the time I've known her:
 - Bought comics as 'an investment'.  She seriously told me it was her retirement plan.
 - 'If you don't have a car loan, you don't have a nice car'
 - Said I was bad with finances for buying one or two CD's every 6-12 months instead of paying for a music streaming subscription.
 - 'Having housemates is for losers!' (at the time we lived in one of the most unaffordable cities in our country)
 - 'I shouldn't have to pay back my student loans because I didn't graduate!'

[lemanfan]

 - 'I shouldn't have to pay back my student loans because I didn't graduate!'

Wait .. but ... why?

[coin]

 - 'I shouldn't have to pay back my student loans because I didn't graduate!'

Wait .. but ... why?

She felt betrayed because her parents said they'd pay for her schooling and didn't follow through, then she dropped out and 'never needed a degree for her job anyway'. 

I can understand her feeling duped, but they didn't make her go to uni, they didn't make her drop out, and she didn't get it squared off with them after her first semester so... What did she expect?  That her parents would front up $30k after she dropped out?  Or that the government issuing the loans would go 'you know what?  Don't worry about it'?

We don't even live in a country where you have to pay usurious interest rates - she just has to pay the money back plus inflation, and if she were on a low income she wouldn't have to pay it.  I had a small university debt to pay off, too, and honestly I barely noticed the money gone.

[HairyUpperLip]

Oh, and TV's.  Gotta have at least two TV's because if you don't you're 'failing at life'.

I have one TV and I haven't been abroad in quite a few years (plan to rectify this this year), I guess I'm 'failing.'
/s

lol, I guess you aren't so lucky after all. hahah sorry couldn't resist. :-p

[sheepstache]

Overheard on Yelp:

my wife & I left our 8 yr old retired racing greyhound Lady for 12 days while we took a long over due vacation and cruise, As Lady is used to certain requirements in food and care, we left specific written instructions, along with all the necessary items she needed. As it was cool while we were gone, Lady also had her coat to keep her warm.

Upon our return, we found that Lady had dropped almost 10lbs. She was emaciated! After speaking with the men that took care of her, we found out that they did not feed her in the manner we had left instructions for. This caused her not to eat all of her food and along with leaving her coat on, they did not notice the drop in weight.

When we spoke with management, they claimed no knowledge of the weight loss, and stated that they follow their "normal" feeding procedures. Which was to place Lady in a crate with her food on the floor instead of the raised feeding stand we had provided.

I understand being upset if the kennel agreed to special instructions and didn't follow through, but these people seem like the definition of high maintenance and should probably be looking at a 24/7 dog nanny with bedpan and catheter included

I had a great dane that as he got older had to have a raised food dish because he had to bend down to reach one on the floor and couldn't do it when his arthritis got bad The coat may be a bit much, but the raised food dish can definitely be a necessity for tall dogs. Also, 10lbs on a greyhound is huge. They're skinny enough as is. My dane was not quite that narrow and probably a bit taller (I got a runt so not definitely taller) and 10lbs was very noticeable on him

Yeah, if they're correct that the dog wasn't eating all of her food, that sounds like she had problems accessing it without the raised dish, which sucks, although how would they know for sure? I wouldn't be surprised if the kennel just portions out food based on what the dog _ought_ to be eating and the dog lost weight due to eating an actually healthy amount. So many people keep their dogs overweight.

You can tell with a greyhound.  They are in general very skinny dogs.  And they would also know because they probably were pulling out the food after every meal.  I'd never go to place like that for any pet.

Sure, they can tell that the dog lost weight. I'm saying the dog may have been carrying too much to begin with. Because they're such skinny animals, to a layperson's eyes they need to be fattened up, so a lot of people who own them as pets let them be too heavy (same as with most breeds, but I'm thinking it's worse with greyhounds).

Oh I meant how would the owners know the dog wasn't finishing her meals. Since they weren't there. It's ambiguous whether the staff reported to them that the dog wasn't finishing each meal or whether the bag of food they left for the dog wasn't finished because the staff wasn't dishing it out in the portions the owner expected.

My mom kennels dogs and she got three owned by a guy who loved to cook and so would cook up special gourmet dishes for the dogs each night!  He didn't expect my mom to do this, of course. But they were each at least 20 pounds overweight and naturally on regular dog food they lost some weight. And in general she'll feed dogs less if they're overweight. She has to balance maintaining the owner's routine against doing something that's unhealthy for the dog.

I guess the dog never lays down then, if it can't reach the ground for food.  IMO if a dog isn't eating all its food it's not that hungry.  A dog also doesn't need a coat in an environmentally controlled environment -- and if you do happen to buy a dog that can't be outside in mild California winters then I still say you made an unmustachian purchase.  All your answers are complainypants ... oh no, I got this extremely high-needs dog and no regular kennel will every be good enough for my special snowflake.  If the dog is really that old and sick, then it should probably stay at the animal hospital.

Well they're not throwing the food on the ground. It's in a dish with sides that are probably 3-4 inches high. It's totally possible an injury could make it difficult for the dog to eat in certain postures or for it to eat too slowly to finish before they come around and collect the dishes. Also I don't know what dogs you know that stop eating when they're not hungry any more. Are you maybe thinking of cats? They're a different species, not a type of dog at all. Seriously though the thing is if the dog is one of those rare ones that stops eating when it's not hungry anymore, they would be seeing that at home too.

I think the owner's point was that the dog _didn't_ need the coat inside and that the kennel should have realized this.

I don't know that getting an injured rescue greyhound that needs a $10 food bowl stand and a $40 coat really counts as an exploding volcano of wastefulness. But I mean, they did name the dog Lady so I'm totally not ruling out attitude problems on the owners' part.

[merula]

- Said I was bad with finances for buying one or two CD's every 6-12 months instead of paying for a music streaming subscription.

I read this and thought, how could coin possibly be bad with money for buying certificates of deposit?

And then I realized I'm an idiot.

[zolotiyeruki]

- Said I was bad with finances for buying one or two CD's every 6-12 months instead of paying for a music streaming subscription.

I read this and thought, how could coin possibly be bad with money for buying certificates of deposit?

And then I realized I'm an idiot.

Don't beat yourself up--I had the same reaction.  In fact, I didn't realize my mistake until I read your reply! :)

[Dollar Slice]

- Said I was bad with finances for buying one or two CD's every 6-12 months instead of paying for a music streaming subscription.

I read this and thought, how could coin possibly be bad with money for buying certificates of deposit?

And then I realized I'm an idiot.

Don't beat yourself up--I had the same reaction.  In fact, I didn't realize my mistake until I read your reply! :)

Me too, except my reaction was more like, "OK, so those are a pretty bad investment right now, but what does it have to do with music?"

And I buy compact discs on a regular basis...

[HairyUpperLip]

- Said I was bad with finances for buying one or two CD's every 6-12 months instead of paying for a music streaming subscription.

I read this and thought, how could coin possibly be bad with money for buying certificates of deposit?

And then I realized I'm an idiot.

Don't beat yourself up--I had the same reaction.  In fact, I didn't realize my mistake until I read your reply! :)

lol - same. :)

[JLee]

One of my friends posted "good news: got tax return" and then "bad news: had it for less than a day."

I was prepared to post that here, but it sounds like they used it to pay off a student loan so... I guess it might not fit :)

I had mine for less than a day too.

$1500 to go and my 2016 IRA will be done. :P

[4alpacas]

- Said I was bad with finances for buying one or two CD's every 6-12 months instead of paying for a music streaming subscription.

I read this and thought, how could coin possibly be bad with money for buying certificates of deposit?

And then I realized I'm an idiot.

Don't beat yourself up--I had the same reaction.  In fact, I didn't realize my mistake until I read your reply! :)

lol - same. :)

Oops!  I didn't notice my oversight until I read merula's comment. 

[mm1970]

I guess it is judgemental of me, and I work hard not to be

No I disagree, I don't think you're being judgmental. Though I understanding you could feel so.

Maybe it is just jealousy in a way, because I decided to stop having kids at 2, partly for financial reasons.  I feel like way too many women who are undecided about having another kid are persuaded to have another and to "follow your heart".  Or "you'll never regret having another kid".  My feeling is a lot of people do regret it but won't admit it.

Yeah, that's how I feel. I can't say I understand your position as I do not have kids, but I know a ton of people that have kids that they can't afford and then will complain about they are "unlucky," due to a random event, which I don't are all that random (if you have an older house, there is more upkeep required, and must plan for expenses that crop up).

3 is the new 2, don'tcha know!

It's interesting because I feel like when I was in my 20s, maybe early 30s, when most normal people I know were having kids, it was 2, maybe only 1.  Money, environment - whatever reason.  Two.

(I say "normal people" because I was 35.75 and 42 when I had mine).

Now it seems like there are a lot more 3s and 4s.  I have a couple of friends with 4, several with 3.  And in my "toddler" group, there are a LOT of women having a 3rd, compared to my older son's group (where there is one person with 3 and two with 4, but most are at 2.)

I've had a few people actually tell me to have a third.  Now, I know that I *look* young, but at least a couple of these people KNOW that I'm almost 46 years old.  Um, guys, eggs are toast and even if there were one or two good ones, nope.  Hubs took care of that.

[mm1970]

A (very small) part of me was weirdly pleased that I'm apparently so awesome she sees me as "the competition".  The rest of me feels awkward and annoyed because I'm dead certain I haven't done anything wrong and she only wants to rain on my parade to make herself feel better about whatever is going on in her life.

Pretty fascinating when you get entered into a race without knowing it! 
I find it interesting that people do this. They compete with you for no reason.  It's best to avoid them, but sometimes you can't.  It's OKAY that you value different things, it's ok!! 

Long long ago, I was in a small nuke school for the Navy, 11 people.  9 men, 2 women.  Naturally, the other woman and I bonded a bit.  We both were sharing apartments with guys. It was 6 months of school, we were all ensigns. 

For some reason, she was seen as "cool" by one of the guys.  He REALLY wanted to hang out with her.  She just shrugged and didn't get why he thought she was so cool.  (I can tell you.  She was smart, nice, fun.  Generally a great person.  That's why I liked her BUT she also went to MIT and Stanford, and liked to ski.  Very outdoorsy.)  He got upset that we were friends.  In *his* mind, SHE was cool and HE was cool and two of the other guys were cool, and she had no business hanging out with me.

I don't experience that so much anymore. 

[JordanOfGilead]

A (very small) part of me was weirdly pleased that I'm apparently so awesome she sees me as "the competition".  The rest of me feels awkward and annoyed because I'm dead certain I haven't done anything wrong and she only wants to rain on my parade to make herself feel better about whatever is going on in her life.

Pretty fascinating when you get entered into a race without knowing it! 

Even better when you find out that you're winning!

[coin]

A (very small) part of me was weirdly pleased that I'm apparently so awesome she sees me as "the competition".  The rest of me feels awkward and annoyed because I'm dead certain I haven't done anything wrong and she only wants to rain on my parade to make herself feel better about whatever is going on in her life.

Pretty fascinating when you get entered into a race without knowing it! 

Even better when you find out that you're winning!

My SO and I were talking about this the other night and he said "yeah, it's not a competition.... But if it were, we'd be winning..."

I realised today that she doesn't even know the half of it. If she knew about my stash, FI or my job, she would have conniptions.

(I really just wanted to use the word conniptions)

Also overheard from Facebook - an acquaintance has had to declare bankruptcy because he speculaated on property and lost. But that's ok! He can always buy another!