Also, since when are we defined by our clothing/style/look? Am I on the correct forum?
:-) I could care less what people wear, but what you chose to wear does reflect something about you, whether you want it to or not, even if what it says is 'i don't give a fuck'. So you're a generic person, own it ;-P
not saying I don't judge people sometimes based on how they look, but if you don't dig deeper you never really know.
I'm not defined by my clothing, just like I'm not defined by my job, education, car, or anything else. Those things are all a small part of me, but any of them can be changed. I change my clothes often, as mtn points out, to fit the occasion.
I went to a business meeting recently with a CW and a very important person who we knew would likely be dressed very well. It was a Friday, which for me (and usually my CW) means jeans, polo, tennis shoes. I wore the usual, CW wore a fancy suit.
I'm not interested in impressing anyone with my clothes. If you choose not to work with me based on the jeans/polo, your loss.
@miss madge, I agree, you can like it or not, your choice. I just hope it doesn't preclude you from actually working with/knowing that person. You don't need to be attracted to someone or like what they're wearing to have a positive interaction with them.
While all of someone's choices reflect *something* about them, I agree that it's a mistake for the observer to assume that they know what that something really is.
Eg., if you see me out in sweatpants, it may be *obvious* to an observer that I don't care about how I look in general. However, it could be that I care very much and that look is the look I'm going for (eg., apparently normcore is where it's at in some super stylish circles
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Normcore). Or, it could be that I care very much when I'm anywhere but the grocery store.
It could be that the observer has biases against people who pop their collars or wear huge hoop earrings and the mistake is when they assume that *their* biases are actual representations of the person they're seeing.
I'm a 34 year old woman, with mostly a "basic" look-plain blonde hair,etc, but then a nose ring and tattoos. I can often be seen out wearing anything from large hoop earrings with leggings and booties, to linen pants with a tucked-in blouse, to yoga pants with a t-shirt. I am a physics professor with a PhD who is pretty well established/published career-wise. I'm a mother. And I have a net worth consistent with being on the path to FI. Almost no one expects any of these things based on how I look and their biases regarding what certain people should look like (the main ones being subconsciously gender-based ideas, but that's a different topic). I actually am usually saying *something* with what I'm wearing (I have an odd sense of humor and like to try out different things sometimes and sometimes just don't GAF); good luck figuring out what it is I'm saying on any given day.
With that said, I do judge others' outfits. I look at them and what I like, don't like, etc, b/c I'm interested in it (just how people here often judge others' spending). What I try not to do is think that what someone is wearing tells me anything about them as a person, other than that's what they chose to wear right then.