Author Topic: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.  (Read 74886 times)

strider3700

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #50 on: December 15, 2013, 06:10:34 PM »
Just to be clear we didn't spend 1k.   We convinced family and friends to donate 1k worth of stuff.   We had some financial outlay in this but the vast majority of our contribution was in time and gas picking things up and delivering it.

nikki

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #51 on: December 15, 2013, 06:42:55 PM »
Just to be clear we didn't spend 1k.   We convinced family and friends to donate 1k worth of stuff.   We had some financial outlay in this but the vast majority of our contribution was in time and gas picking things up and delivering it.

Ahh gotcha.

That makes it only slightly less enraging.

MoneyCat

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #52 on: December 15, 2013, 06:57:03 PM »
 Most people demonstrating this complete idiocy when it comes to money are suffering from some kind of mental illness, whether depression or something else. 

aglassman

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #53 on: December 16, 2013, 09:15:00 AM »
The "we deserve it" spending is one of my biggest pet peeves.  It has such a connotation of entitlement.

Also, sorry to hear about your charity fail.  I've noticed that most people in low income housing or on a lot of assistance ALWAYS have cable / dish TV.  Too bad the government doesn't hand out face punches in some of these cases!

CommonCents

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #54 on: December 16, 2013, 09:38:37 AM »
left it there.  It was collected for them so they got it.

Oh, I would have not delivered it, assuming people donated based on false pretenses and they might have reconsidered their gifts had they known the full situation.  (I would have called the donors if possible to confirm and then given to another needy family.)

Paul der Krake

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #55 on: December 16, 2013, 09:45:04 AM »
Grrr. It's anecdotes like this that make regular folks discard the needs of the truly needy, "look, all the poor are freeloaders and lazy and stupid!"

Shame on that family.

Mrs.FamilyFinances

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #56 on: December 16, 2013, 11:39:09 PM »
Another month and a serious need to vent.

The friends have family who recently had a tragedy. Very sad for everyone involved. That family got an apartment but are on welfare and as the friends told us they have nothing and only have $150 left over each month after paying for rent.  For christmas my wife and I tend to pick a family in need and donate to them.  This year my wife decided it would be that family and went off on a campaign to help them out.  I was not optimistic as this family made their own problems. Call my judgemental but went you've fried your own brain to the point you can't even read anymore  I'm not overly wanting to help you out.   

So today was the drop off day of what we collected.   We were told they had nothing so we got couches, and furniture and a TV and close to $1k in food and gift cards. It wouldn't all fit in 2 trucks. We get there and take the couch up and I see the apartment for the first time.    Some peoples definitions of "nothing" are radically different then mine.     That place had more and better furniture then I had until my 3rd year of owning a house.    I had to move 3 sets of speakers to get the couch in.    On the whiteboard was a note about how cable is being hooked up on friday. I don't have cable to this day.  I went from not overjoyed to you have to be fucking kidding me.   

I see it as we've just spent the last month busting our ass doing charity for a family that didn't deserve it and didn't need it.

Anyway I'm done with this entire thing.   As was pointed out by others a long time ago  these people aren't  worth the stress to know.   My wife is friends with them and I don't see her writing them off but we'll see.   My wife is almost always optimistic but even she was pissed off to the point of crying.

You are more kind hearted than I am. I would have canceled the whole thing and left with all the collected items.

Self-employed-swami

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #57 on: December 18, 2013, 02:44:46 AM »
Wow.  I can't believe that 'having nothing' means you had to make room for your, very generous, gifts.


grantmeaname

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #58 on: December 18, 2013, 05:48:26 AM »
Most people demonstrating this complete idiocy when it comes to money are suffering from some kind of mental illness, whether depression or something else.
I don't know about that. Plenty of vapid consumerists don't have clinical depression, and plenty of folks with clinical depression manage to run their financial lives smoothly.

Megatron

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #59 on: December 18, 2013, 12:52:48 PM »
this is like a slow train wreck where you can't look away.

strider3700

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #60 on: February 04, 2014, 12:42:59 PM »
Well after hearing nothing at all since Christmas (my wife is now no longer wanting to speak to them although occasionally feels guilty and will talk with the other wife)  we saw an update on facebook.  I guess it's been a year because it's time for another cross continent conference/vacation for the wife.    Last time they were in way better money shape but couldn't afford groceries on the return.  This time well I have no idea what the fuck they're thinking.  I haven't heard if the dad will need to take time off work to watch the kids since mom is away "networking".   

And more posts.  She's heading on the road to do sales parties anywhere and everywhere bribing everyone with free stuff if they'll host the party.  Perhaps I'm completely wrong but I don't think she makes much on these sales at all.  No enough to justify all of the travel and so on expenses. 
« Last Edit: February 04, 2014, 12:56:38 PM by strider3700 »

Self-employed-swami

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #61 on: February 05, 2014, 09:20:01 AM »
The year I did home jewellery parties (mainly so I could earn all the free jewellery myself) I earned just enough income, to cover my travel expenses (I traveled across the country on vacation, and did a party for a friend, just for the express purpose of being able to write off the expenses against income earned).

I made 30% of anything I sold, so it was decent, for the purpose I was using it for (and I came out ahead, only because of the free jewellery).

Gerard

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #62 on: February 18, 2014, 07:19:05 AM »
"God helps those that help themselves."

In fairness to religious folks, the Bible doesn't actually say this. In fact, it's kind of the opposite of the teachings of that Jesus guy.

I'm pretty sure *you're* not using it in a mean-spirited way, Frankies Girl, based on your other posts (plus you get bonus points for "booger-eating moron"), but I do hear it from some "Christians" who are a little deficient in the love-your-neighbour category.

momo

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #63 on: February 21, 2014, 09:41:09 PM »
Another month and a serious need to vent.

The friends have family who recently had a tragedy. Very sad for everyone involved. That family got an apartment but are on welfare and as the friends told us they have nothing and only have $150 left over each month after paying for rent.  For christmas my wife and I tend to pick a family in need and donate to them.  This year my wife decided it would be that family and went off on a campaign to help them out.  I was not optimistic as this family made their own problems. Call my judgemental but went you've fried your own brain to the point you can't even read anymore  I'm not overly wanting to help you out.   

So today was the drop off day of what we collected.   We were told they had nothing so we got couches, and furniture and a TV and close to $1k in food and gift cards. It wouldn't all fit in 2 trucks. We get there and take the couch up and I see the apartment for the first time.    Some peoples definitions of "nothing" are radically different then mine.     That place had more and better furniture then I had until my 3rd year of owning a house.    I had to move 3 sets of speakers to get the couch in.    On the whiteboard was a note about how cable is being hooked up on friday. I don't have cable to this day.  I went from not overjoyed to you have to be fucking kidding me.   

I see it as we've just spent the last month busting our ass doing charity for a family that didn't deserve it and didn't need it.

Anyway I'm done with this entire thing.   As was pointed out by others a long time ago  these people aren't  worth the stress to know.   My wife is friends with them and I don't see her writing them off but we'll see.   My wife is almost always optimistic but even she was pissed off to the point of crying.

You are both far too kind. Their behavior is beyond stupid.  May we suggest a total cleanse from your life?  We would've left,.not said a word and donated the items to a real family in need.
« Last Edit: February 25, 2014, 02:06:50 PM by StashtasticMomo »

golfer44

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #64 on: February 21, 2014, 10:14:33 PM »
Is the wife doing some sort of mutli level marketing? Like skincare products etc

strider3700

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #65 on: February 21, 2014, 10:40:53 PM »
no cosmetics but yes.

JamesAt15

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #66 on: February 23, 2014, 11:29:59 PM »
"God helps those that help themselves."

In fairness to religious folks, the Bible doesn't actually say this. In fact, it's kind of the opposite of the teachings of that Jesus guy.

I'm pretty sure *you're* not using it in a mean-spirited way, Frankies Girl, based on your other posts (plus you get bonus points for "booger-eating moron"), but I do hear it from some "Christians" who are a little deficient in the love-your-neighbour category.

Perhaps I should just let this thread-dog lie, but the first passage that comes to mind (from my long ago sunday school days) is Matthew 6:28.

    And why take ye thought for raiment?
    Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow;
    they toil not, neither do they spin:

strider3700

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #67 on: February 24, 2014, 01:26:00 AM »
An update.   They're off at a concert out of town for the weekend.   Must be nice.     I was ignoring that as it's technically possible to do that trip sort of on the cheap ie a couple hundred (they won't).     What I found far more interesting was their cat got sick and needed to go to the vet.   To cover the bill they cashed in part of their RRSP.   I don't know if they was $100 or $1000 vet bill.  If It was $1000 then the cat should have been put down. if it was $100 then why don't you have $100...

Now that I'm typing this I think I've figured out where the money came from to go to the concert.  If you're emptying your retirement savings why not just take a bit to head out for the weekend as well...


Quark

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #68 on: February 25, 2014, 08:12:15 AM »
You wouldn't spend $1000 to help your cat? That's cold. What Mustachian doesn't have $1k laying around?

strider3700

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #69 on: February 25, 2014, 09:55:44 AM »
Did you read this whole thread?    This family borrows money to pay for milk for their kids.  They shouldn't have a cat   they can't afford it.   

Cheddar Stacker

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #70 on: February 25, 2014, 10:12:10 AM »
I have an 11 year old dog, and I'm sorry but there's no way I'm spending $1,000 to help him at this point. He's had a good life. I'm with Strider here, they have no business taking care of a cat when they can't take care of themselves.

G-dog

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #71 on: February 26, 2014, 07:35:39 PM »
@strider3700. Thanks for posting the updates over time.  Certainly illustrates a pattern of behavior vs. a temporary lapse of judgement.  Also, for a newbie like me, it made this a very easy thread to read and catch up with some other MMMs.

golfer44

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #72 on: March 20, 2014, 06:37:10 AM »
This thread is compelling in a rubbernecking way.

Absolutely. One of the most viewed threads on this entire forum is "overheard at work".

AllChoptUp

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #73 on: March 20, 2014, 08:59:14 AM »
This thread is compelling in a rubbernecking way.

Absolutely. One of the most viewed threads on this entire forum is "overheard at work".

Confession: I am addicted to that thread.

strider3700

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #74 on: June 11, 2014, 02:07:34 PM »
It's update time.

I'm thinking of taking up religion.  Miracles do occur apparently.

The husband had been working out of town.  He was away a good 3 weeks out of every month.  As well his boss was screwing him.  Paying him for time worked not time driving the hundreds of miles between jobs. It was brutal.  Anyways the husband landed an interview for avery good union position with a large corporation.  He got the job but it involves out of town training for a couple of months coming home for about a week at a time then gone for 3 or 4  weeks.

 Whatever  this is the type of job that if you don't royally screw up (and nothing suggests to me that he's incompetent when it comes to work) you're set for life.   He's also getting paid to take the training.  This will be ongoing until almost winter with a month break inbetween training sessions.  That month may suck,  I'm pretty sure he won't be paid during that time so he'll need to float the bills somehow but after that it's train until he's on the job and making a pretty good wage.  Way more then he did before.   

So he's back for 10 days for the first time in almost 4 weeks.   Things are going well in the training.  And Then I find out that the wife is really upset.  She had really really wanted to go away on a big vacation during these 10 days he's home.   Spend a week somewhere sunny but the timing didn't work out.

ummm.... ok.    Apparently all of the other financial problems haven't bit them in the ass.  Oh and it's property tax time here.  last I heard they still owe last years.  This years was a shock to me so they're going to be getting an even nastier bill...  lucky for them the city has a policy of outbidding everyone one buildings that go to auction in town then working with the homeowners to keep them in them...  They've got a few more years of non payment before that becomes an issue.

 

2ndTimer

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #75 on: August 28, 2014, 12:34:05 PM »
This has the sort of horrid fascination that I used to find in the Spanish language soap operas I used improve my language skills.  My spouse and I are still muttering:

"Maria Clara; tan pura, tan innocente, tan embarazada."  (Maria Clara; so pure, so innocent, so pregnant.)

libertarian4321

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #76 on: August 28, 2014, 06:12:12 PM »
I've got nothing for you except nods of agreement, but this part cracked me the hell up.

(If my atheist ass hears god will provide from them one more time I'm going to lose it)

May his noodly appendage touch you with goodness this holiday season. rAmen.

I was an atheist, until God (The Flying Spaghetti Monster) touched me with his noodly apendage.

Now, I am a Christian.  For the FSM so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, Jesus Christ, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.

However, I do not believe in the "God will provide" or "God wills it" nonsense spouted by lazy people of all religions as an excuse for inaction.

jprince7827

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #77 on: September 01, 2014, 02:33:58 PM »
Wow, what an amazing sequence.

strider3700

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #78 on: September 24, 2014, 12:11:17 PM »
Update time.   

my wife and the other wife went out to do a bit of back to school shopping/grab a coffee/get out of the house.   The other wife got a NSF when attempting to pay $7 for school paper.   I've never had a NSF but don't you get dinged something like $30 in penalty for having done it?

Later we heard that the other wife may have found another job while the kids are in school and just for the run up to christmas.  This is an absolute no brainer.   Take the job unless something better becomes available.  It's a basic retail job in a higher end niche shop.    Her only concern is that she'll spend her entire pay cheque in the store so her husband wants her to work out some sort of agreement that she can only spend a certain percentage in the store.   The store sells high end linen, towels and crap like that....

justajane

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #79 on: September 24, 2014, 12:56:35 PM »
This thread is full of comedic gold, from Frankie's "booger eating morons" to the quip about failing to read Proverbs. Good stuff.

Your friends remind me of this couple at our church who was always begging for free things and services on our church's listserv. They were in seminary and now raising support to be missionaries, so I guess they thought this type of shameless begging was okay, since they are supposedly doing "God's work." What irks me the most is that their begging usually worked. They managed to snag a free apartment for a summer that was intended for very low income people like women transitioning from the homeless shelter nearby. Then we get an e-mail requesting to borrow or have window units, preferably four (!!!) to keep the place cool. Here are some of the other things they have begged for: a bike for their daughter (excellent condition, preferably new), other peoples' air miles, someone to drive their car over 1,000 miles (so the wife and kids could fly), free lodging (at least 3-4 times), etc. etc. They have since left our church, but I nonetheless got to see another friend on Facebook take up their begging for them. This time they need to borrow a VERY RELIABLE minivan for three months.

One quibble with the OP. Upthread you used the phrase "must be nice." Can we agree to retire that phrase? In my experience it is more often than not used by non-Mustachians towards those of us who saved to pay for something. My sister who is pathetic with money uses it all the time.

Mrs. J

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #80 on: September 24, 2014, 06:48:38 PM »
It's my understanding that if she was using a debit card and got an NSF, it just means the transaction won't go through and there's no penalty (other than utter mortification), since no trading of goods and services actually took place.

Please never stop updating this thread.
« Last Edit: September 24, 2014, 06:50:22 PM by Mrs. J »

odput

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #81 on: September 26, 2014, 06:48:57 AM »
Please never stop updating this thread.

+1!

acroy

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #82 on: September 26, 2014, 08:14:22 AM »
Epic thread!! :)

My Christian ethics insert:
"And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself"

enabling/rewarding the neighbor's foolish lifestyle choices is bad, bad dude! 'False charity'. We all know moochers... generally nice people, other folks want to help them out. The harder (but truly loving) thing to do is not enable it.

jka468

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #83 on: September 26, 2014, 10:48:49 AM »
I stopped reading when I saw that your friend seems to be older than 16 and still posts self-indulgent pity party crap on facebook for her entire network to see. That's a glaring sign of this person being unable to be helped.

strider3700

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #84 on: September 26, 2014, 11:36:44 AM »
They're almost 40.   

Yesterday the wife called my wife crying because she feels worthless after having to borrow money from her parents to pay bills.     They did however both just sign up to my gym promising to pay the gym next month....  They did something else on the promise to pay method but I don't remember what.   Total deferred cost is likely to be $300.     I just can't imagine being in that situation.

The good news is the husband has been getting overtime and thanks to the great job that's paying double time.    He's working every second of it that he can get.   

My guess is they're too far into the hole to get out though.   

iris lily

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #85 on: October 07, 2014, 08:31:18 PM »


My guess is they're too far into the hole to get out though.

I could send your friends a check for everything they owe, wiping out their debt and they would be in debt again in 6 months.

They are in the hole because that's where they are comfortable.

strider3700

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #86 on: April 06, 2015, 04:11:18 PM »
It's been a long long time since the last update.   With holiday weekends you run into people you don't see very often.  Guess who I ran into...

They found rot in the floor of one of their bathrooms.   bathroom was from the 90's and looked a little dated.  Rather then pull the toilet and maybe the vanity, cut out the rot, patch with new ply and then lay down new lino they gutted the entire thing to the studs cutting the tub in half to remove it.   They then went shopping and realized that new tubs are kind of expensive and everything else makes this project really expensive.   So they put plywood down to fix the hole and then locked the door to that room.   Lucky they had an extra bathroom.

I also found out they went to some company that specialized in debt.   I'm not sure how it works but they won't be declaring bankruptcy, they don't have to give everything up and 3/4 of the debt they have will be forgiven.  They'll be making payments on the remaining 25%.   They're trying to figure out how to get the roof on the house added to the consolidated debt even though that hasn't been spent yet.   I also found out that for the last 3 years they've not  paid a penny towards principal.  $800-$900 a month in interest only payments.   I just sat there drinking my beer nodding my head.   I can't even picture how shit like this happens.

G-dog

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #87 on: April 06, 2015, 04:30:29 PM »
Omg! How does a floor rot out in 20-25 years? How do they not see their pattern of crisis and HAIR ON F'ING FIRE?
It boggles the mind....

strider3700

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #88 on: April 06, 2015, 04:31:58 PM »
leaky seal on the toilet.  It's not a rare place to get damage to a floor.

Indexer

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #89 on: April 06, 2015, 05:11:34 PM »
  I can't even picture how shit like this happens.

I think its pretty obvious.... read this thread ;). 

11ducks

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #90 on: April 07, 2015, 12:06:55 AM »
I love this thread. See if you can convince them that the bathtub can be glued back together.

Cookie78

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #91 on: April 07, 2015, 09:22:47 AM »
Wow I just read the entire thread from the beginning. How depressing.

firelight

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #92 on: April 07, 2015, 09:36:20 AM »
How can a normal person be encouraged to save when people like these spend like there is no tomorrow and YET don't face any dire consequences?? Our laws are at fault - bankruptcy shouldn't be used to fund stupid purchases.

partgypsy

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #93 on: April 07, 2015, 09:51:28 AM »
jamcain, others it actually makes me feel a little better hearing these stories. My parent's finances are also shakesperian in scope. Parents were working class, worked up to upper middle class, Dad retired early, but then drove himself crazy being at home with nothing to do, so took money out of retirement accounts, sold restaurants that provided monthly income, and invested in a couple investments, one which failed, the other the investors ran away with 100's of thousands and then declared bankruptcy. Dad forced to go back to work. Somewhere around this time parents divorce, Mom gets the house. Actually a good asset, back in the early 90's worth 225, 250K with 20K left on the mortgage. Idea was she could sell the house as it was only her living there (4 bedroom, 2 1/2 bath in expensive neighborhood) that she could live or invest that money.
Mom still working part time, pays off mortgage, house appreciates even more.
Dad works his way out of debt, has someone invest in a business with him, does well enough he can buy other investor out and has his own business again.
 
Then in early 2000's things hit the fan (2004 or so?). Mom's house is valued so much, we are urging her to sell! and retire. Houses on her block selling for 500, 600K. Instead she feels so rich she takes out a heloc, starts spending her equity. Also progidal son moves back in with her, a complete leech.
Dad is wondering why people aren't going out to eat so much, restaurant not doing as well.  We (his kids) urge him, just sell the restaurant and retire, you would have a good income between the proceeds of that and soc security (he didn't take until age 72). Instead he decides to double down, borrow money to open up another restaurant which is a white elephant with high operating expenses, lease. Housing bust occurs. Restaurants are closing left and right. Because of high operating costs the 2nd restaurant closes, but he cannot find someone to take over lease so he is on hook for paying  lease every month. After a year force to sell original restaurant to pay off debt. Also lost his townhome as he borrowed money from it to pay for business debt.
My Dad did not have the retirement he envisioned. But at least has social security and still works part time  and so can make it in his little studio apartment.

Mom retires a 2nd time. Each time she retires, cashes out her pension as a lump sum. Instead of using pension proceeds to fix house and sell, spends it on living expenses and then taps heloc for more money. He ss is 550 a month, but her property taxes alone are 7K a year. No basic maintenance on house as "she can't afford it." Also this year she also filled out paperwork to put off paying property taxes, but will have to pay them, with interest (5-7% a year?) at the time of sale. At this time, she still has enough equity to sell the house and downsize to either small house/townhome or rent, but that window is rapidly closing.
My mother since she has retires, sits around, pays for everything for my brother (including premium cable and Xboxes), yet does nothing towards selling house, as every option she deems as beneath her and also my brother doesn't want to move. WTF? It honestly keeps me up at night what she is doing and will soon be both without any money, or a place to live, but she seems unconcerned.   
« Last Edit: April 07, 2015, 10:12:43 AM by partgypsy »

partgypsy

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #94 on: April 07, 2015, 11:14:26 AM »
Sorry for hijacking thread, but from other mustachians, how do you handle it? I have lived my life separate from my parents since I graduated college and moved away, unlike a number of my siblings who are often emeshed in enabling or codependent behavior. But I fear that if mother or sibling(s) become homeless, I will be expected to pick up the pieces, provide money and or housing. I also don't like seeing them suffer, but feel helpless to avert the trainwreck.  I don't really have the resources to help them materially. What would you do?
« Last Edit: April 07, 2015, 11:16:16 AM by partgypsy »

Elderwood17

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #95 on: April 07, 2015, 11:19:05 AM »
Wow I just read the entire thread from the beginning. How depressing.
So did I.  It would make a better reality show than any reality show I have heard of!  It is a cross between a tragedy and a comedy, but whatever it is keep the updates coming please.

Pooplips

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #96 on: April 07, 2015, 11:28:22 AM »
Awesome thread. I'm amazed they have made it this long. Can't wait to read another update.

MgoSam

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #97 on: April 07, 2015, 11:46:53 AM »
I just found out that the friend  was thinking about buying tickets to a concert 2 days before the event.  She was holding off until the husband hears about a different job he applied for.  Ok, even with the raise he may get you can't afford that.  I then heard she bought the tickets. Oh he got the job?   No they aren't hiring now she bought the tickets anyways.  I figured this was coming up because she was wanting babysitting while at the concert.  I was wrong.   She has signed her husband up to go to this event as well.   they'll go over and spend 5 days in their own hotel room, do the concert do the event and then come home.  Won't that be fun we can take the same boat back.


This may sound crazy but this isn't uncommon. I can't recall the psychological principle but researchers did experiments were students were given the situation that they took a final and were planning to go on vacation. The question was if they would take the vacation if they passed the final or if they didn't pass the final and when they would book the vacation. Turned out that for the majority of those that would book the vacation regardless they still waited to hear about their final results. I may not have explained it well, if I can find the study I'll post it.

BMEPhDinCO

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #98 on: April 07, 2015, 01:34:59 PM »
Whenever I feel insecure about how much I'm saving or spending - I can just check this thread out!  Although I do have to wonder at how much y'all's friends seem to tell each other about finances, I almost never hear anything from my friends - except the financially responsible ones sharing their latest wins!

drak0017

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Re: Me being judgemental and a family friends story.
« Reply #99 on: April 07, 2015, 02:13:51 PM »
How does one detect a leaky seal, ideally before rot, besides falling through the floor while on the throne?

It is my understanding that seals on toilets generally last about 10 years before they start to leak.  To be on the safe side, I would replace them every 9 years or so to avoid any issues.