Hey MrsPete, I'm curious about what decision making process you used to map the different paths for your two kids. Did the youngest push for CC, or did you lay down the financial law? Not to pry, but because I might have a simliar-ish situation soon. My middle niece is shaping up to need more guidance than her large pack of very ambitious siblings. Their age adjusted skills, both academic and worldly, are just more advanced than hers are.
To sum it up in a few words, they're different kids. Yes, I can relate to your comment about age adjusted skills, etc.
They're both academically capable (and are both on full tuition scholarship), but the older one was emotionally ready to be "on her own" at a 4-year university. The youngest has always lacked in confidence, and I was afraid that she would be the kid who'd hole up in her dorm and wouldn't thrive at a university. We visited schools, talked about all sorts of options, but in the end, SHE was the one who made the choice to stay home and go to community college. I do think it was the right path for her. I am sure it's better to keep her home an extra year rather than send her out into the world and have her fail and come back thinking college is "too much" for her; we figured it was better to be overly conservative in this situation.
What I really wanted my youngest to do: The school she plans to attend has a fantastic college-within-a-college program. It's a big dorm that holds about 200 students -- all freshmen and sophomores -- and they act as a cohort. They take their basic core classes IN THEIR DORM, and venture out into the main campus for only a few classes as a freshman. It's sort of a "sheltered start". They have their own social programs, community service, and even some meals right there in their own small world. I think it would've been an ideal situation for a shy, nervous freshman.
She is enjoying community college, but she is also keeping an eye towards the day she goes to the "real university". We've looked up information on the transfer program, and we had a talk in the car the other day -- she says she really wants the opportunity to live in a dorm, and we found out the school she plans to attend has a floor just for transfer students. We agreed that's probably a good option for her.
No, money did not play into the equation. We are able and willing to pay for our kids to attend a state school (without borrowing), even before their scholarships kicked in.
Right, I didn't want to use the word "coddle" either, but I couldn't think of a better word. That's why I put it in quotes and clearly stated that I wasn't sure what word to use. But having a few hiccups in the registration process really doesn't seem like the end of the world to me and something that could happen at any state school just like a CC. Community Colleges do not have a monopoly on unhelpful professors and administrators. I think this is very much a YMMV situation.
Of course it's a YMMV situation, but it's more than a few hiccups. Registration was really bad, but I was able to help her through that. She has NO college advisor. I asked if she could be assigned to one, and they said they don't do that; the degree requirements are online. She had no orientation to the school. We tried to lay out a two-year course plan for her ... it doesn't mesh with the general degree requirements for the state university she plans to attend; for example, she needs two math classes to earn her AS degree ... but she needs a DIFFERENT math class to be admitted to the program she wants at the university, and that different math class isn't offered at community college ... so she's going to end up taking a third math to satisfy the requirements of both schools. She is going to encounter a similar situation with her science classes. It isn't going to be as simple as "do two years here and then two years there". Because she finished high school with a number of college classes under her belt, she will be able to earn the AS in three semesters ... but because of the mis-matches, she will not finish college in four years total.
Her sister, who went straight to the university, had a whole week of "welcome to campus" activities, an RA looking after her, an older student in her department acting as mentor ... and she has breezed through 3 1/2 years getting exactly the classes she needs to streamline herself towards graduation -- she will graduate in four years in a tough science-oriented program.
Is our experience typical? I don't know, but I am sure that my youngest -- though she is in the right place for her personality -- is getting less at this moment, and because she'll end up in college more than four years, it
isn't going to save us money. As you can tell, I'm not entirely satisfied -- but I'm keeping that to myself around the house.
CC always looked like the best option if you didn't know what you were going to do in college. It is especially useful if your kid may not be ready to live on their own. Who doesn't have an anecdote about the brilliant kid from high school who now works retail because they failed their freshman year of college?
The pitfall to watch for with the CC route is that students have to have a good idea of what happens after 2 years. Students need to know the school they want to go to afterwards and if they will take the credits at face value. Out of state and small private colleges may not take CC credits and leave the kid paying for 3 or 4 years of their tuition despite their prior hard work.
Oh, yes. As a high school teacher, I know plenty of those brilliant-but-now-waiting-tables types. And I think my youngest could have become one of those if we'd pushed her towards the university too soon. Both my husband and I thought community college was the right answer for her, and we were secretly a bit relieved when she made the choice.
Transferring credits is a tricky game. It's better than it was in the past, and you can click through the internet and see which credits are "guaranteed to transfer" to one of our state colleges. Thing is, they're guaranteed to transfer ...
NOT guaranteed to transfer as your math credit! So you may take a tough class in community college, only to find out that the state school will only grant elective credit for it ...
and you have to retake the class to satisfy a major requirement.
Not all 18 years olds need guidance. Some do. It's good that you were able to identify what was best for your kids.
I work with 17-18 year olds, and I suspect MAYBE 1% of them are really ready to go it alone without guidance. The vast, vast majority need some help with the transition -- even those who are ready for the academics, even those who are emotionally mature and self-driven.
My parents provided me with no guidance at all; in truth, my mom didn't want me to go to college straight out of high school -- she did it and flunked out, and she feared I'd do the same. On some level, she wanted me to fail. I didn't fail, but I also didn't prosper right away. I think that's typical. I wanted my kids to do more than muddle through, and a part of that was protecting my financial investment!