More from the Onion

[Norioch]

Study Finds 68% Of Americans Unprepared For Sudden Financial Stability

[clarkfan1979]

killer.

[MgoSam]

This is awesome and so true.

[Kaspian]

If all credit card/mortgage/student debt were magically paid off, everyone was fully employed, and their wages raised to exactly meet their current living standards, so that everyone's slate was wiped clean to perfection, what percentage of Americans do you think would have it all fucked up again within one year?  (Canadians too, for that matter--we're worse.)  I want to have faith in humanity, but my realistic guess is about 20-30% would be in debt again and/or be unemployed.   Give it five years and we'd be back to all the same sob stories of why people can't get ahead.  :(

[Left]

If all credit card/mortgage/student debt were magically paid off, everyone was fully employed, and their wages raised to exactly meet their current living standards, so that everyone's slate was wiped clean to perfection, what percentage of Americans do you think would have it all fucked up again within one year?  (Canadians too, for that matter--we're worse.)  I want to have faith in humanity, but my realistic guess is about 20-30% would be in debt again and/or be unemployed.   Give it five years and we'd be back to all the same sob stories of why people can't get ahead.  :(

lol it was fine before they fucked up and went into debt the first time... people aren't born with debt... their choices got them there...

why would they make different choices if they don't realize those choices are what caused the debt in the first place?

I give it until their first paycheck... then they will spend 110% of it while putting aside 10% for savings.... the 20% "debt" is the 20% interest on their credit cards...

[frugalnacho]

If all credit card/mortgage/student debt were magically paid off, everyone was fully employed, and their wages raised to exactly meet their current living standards, so that everyone's slate was wiped clean to perfection, what percentage of Americans do you think would have it all fucked up again within one year? (Canadians too, for that matter--we're worse.)  I want to have faith in humanity, but my realistic guess is about 20-30% would be in debt again and/or be unemployed.   Give it five years and we'd be back to all the same sob stories of why people can't get ahead.  :(

The same percentage we have now.  They all willingly took on the current debt they have, and they would do it again if they got the chance.  I would predict a huge boom in new cars and big screen tvs.  Hey i'm debt free, I can finally get that truck I deserve!

[Kaspian]

lol it was fine before they fucked up and went into debt the first time... people aren't born with debt... their choices got them there...

The same percentage we have now.  They all willingly took on the current debt they have, and they would do it again if they got the chance.  I would predict a huge boom in new cars and big screen tvs.  Hey i'm debt free, I can finally get that truck I deserve!

Hahaha...  I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks this way.  Confession:  When somebody who runs a 'personal finance blog' (and I use the term loosely) celebrates finally reaching a net worth of $0.00, the 'Supreme Asshole of the Universe' side of me always wants to say, "Congratulations on making it to ZERO!  Isn't ZERO where you started in the first place, dummy?  Do they give out Olympic medals now for running the courses backwards?  And you somehow think you're qualified to train other people?"  But I don't.  I laugh along with him and then close his asshole green body back in the trashcan.  ...Where he lives happily while I try to be a nice guy.

[BarkyardBQ]

lol it was fine before they fucked up and went into debt the first time... people aren't born with debt... their choices got them there...

The same percentage we have now.  They all willingly took on the current debt they have, and they would do it again if they got the chance.  I would predict a huge boom in new cars and big screen tvs.  Hey i'm debt free, I can finally get that truck I deserve!

Hahaha...  I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks this way.  Confession:  When somebody who runs a 'personal finance blog' (and I use the term loosely) celebrates finally reaching a net worth of $0.00, the 'Supreme Asshole of the Universe' side of me always wants to say, "Congratulations on making it to ZERO!  Isn't ZERO where you started in the first place, dummy?  Do they give out Olympic medals now for running the courses backwards?  And you somehow think you're qualified to train other people?"  But I don't.  I laugh along with him and then close his asshole green body back in the trashcan.  ...Where he lives happily while I try to be a nice guy.

That's quite uncalled for...

I think your quoted self title is appropriate, simply because you chose to spew your disrespect here.

[Gone Fishing]

If all credit card/mortgage/student debt were magically paid off, everyone was fully employed, and their wages raised to exactly meet their current living standards, so that everyone's slate was wiped clean to perfection, what percentage of Americans do you think would have it all fucked up again within one year? (Canadians too, for that matter--we're worse.)  I want to have faith in humanity, but my realistic guess is about 20-30% would be in debt again and/or be unemployed.   Give it five years and we'd be back to all the same sob stories of why people can't get ahead.  :(

The same percentage we have now.  They all willingly took on the current debt they have, and they would do it again if they got the chance.  I would predict a huge boom in new cars and big screen tvs.  Hey i'm debt free, I can finally get that truck I deserve!

Looks like there is still some room for additional stupidity according to the following chart:

http://www.federalreserve.gov/releases/housedebt/

Note that stupidity peaked in 2007, fell dramatically from 2009-2012 and is now poised for a recovery!

[jinga nation]

lol it was fine before they fucked up and went into debt the first time... people aren't born with debt... their choices got them there...

The same percentage we have now.  They all willingly took on the current debt they have, and they would do it again if they got the chance.  I would predict a huge boom in new cars and big screen tvs.  Hey i'm debt free, I can finally get that truck I deserve!

Hahaha...  I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks this way.  Confession:  When somebody who runs a 'personal finance blog' (and I use the term loosely) celebrates finally reaching a net worth of $0.00, the 'Supreme Asshole of the Universe' side of me always wants to say, "Congratulations on making it to ZERO!  Isn't ZERO where you started in the first place, dummy?  Do they give out Olympic medals now for running the courses backwards?  And you somehow think you're qualified to train other people?"  But I don't.  I laugh along with him and then close his asshole green body back in the trashcan.  ...Where he lives happily while I try to be a nice guy.

Kaspian is probably my financial doppelganger. Do many of us think the same way? Replicants, I tell ya!

[BTDretire]

The same percentage we have now.  They all willingly took on the current debt they have, and they would do it again if they got the chance.  I would predict a huge boom in new cars and big screen tvs.  Hey i'm debt free, I can finally get that truck I deserve!

 I'm on the Gulf Coast where a lot of BP money was spread around. I watched first hand as many bought new trucks and motorcycles with their free money. Apparently they didn't pay cash, because, it was only a year and sometimes two years before their goodies were reposed.
 One careless fellow bought a new motorcycle with BP money and then had it reposed.
Then his girlfriend got a BP check and bought him another motorcycle, yep, he lost that one to.
 All that BP money did help the local economy though.

[FIPurpose]

If all credit card/mortgage/student debt were magically paid off, everyone was fully employed, and their wages raised to exactly meet their current living standards, so that everyone's slate was wiped clean to perfection, what percentage of Americans do you think would have it all fucked up again within one year? (Canadians too, for that matter--we're worse.)  I want to have faith in humanity, but my realistic guess is about 20-30% would be in debt again and/or be unemployed.   Give it five years and we'd be back to all the same sob stories of why people can't get ahead.  :(

The same percentage we have now.  They all willingly took on the current debt they have, and they would do it again if they got the chance.  I would predict a huge boom in new cars and big screen tvs.  Hey i'm debt free, I can finally get that truck I deserve!

Looks like there is still some room for additional stupidity according to the following chart:

http://www.federalreserve.gov/releases/housedebt/

Note that stupidity peaked in 2007, fell dramatically from 2009-2012 and is now poised for a recovery!

Excel that data!

[irishbear99]

If all credit card/mortgage/student debt were magically paid off, everyone was fully employed, and their wages raised to exactly meet their current living standards, so that everyone's slate was wiped clean to perfection, what percentage of Americans do you think would have it all fucked up again within one year? 

How many lottery winners find themselves bankrupt within a few years? I expect we can look at that data and extrapolate to the larger population. If that's the case, I think your estimate of 20-30% is, well, generous.

[Kaspian]

Looks like there is still some room for additional stupidity according to the following chart:

http://www.federalreserve.gov/releases/housedebt/

Note that stupidity peaked in 2007, fell dramatically from 2009-2012 and is now poised for a recovery!

Excel that data!

Because God forbid anyone learn from past mistakes or think that history could possibly repeat itself.