The Money Mustache Community
Around the Internet => Antimustachian Wall of Shame and Comedy => Topic started by: Hall11235 on November 17, 2021, 12:47:24 PM
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Hi, all!
I was thinking, as we come into the worst part of the year (Christmas - blech), it might be fun to see who has the absolute wildest gift-giving traditions in their family. You got an aunt who gives out iPads every year? Let's hear about it!
I have two that come to mind:
1. My DW's family is insane. They are a bigger family (about 15 members all told at the house for Xmas day). It is a requirement that EVERY person buys EVERY other person a gift. Any suggestions about how bad this is for our wallets and the planet is usually met with either blank stares or eye rolls followed by condescending chuckles. The best my DW and I have been able to do after 5 years of cajoling is that we now buy and get gifts as a couple.
2. On my side of the family, for as far back as I can remember, my mother had her 'Christmas job.' Every year, after the school year would start, she would go out and find a min wage job somewhere (Target, Walmart, Starbucks, etc.), and would work there for 8-10 hours a week until the two weeks before Christmas. After I turned 14, she managed to find a gig at a local coffee shop that was cool with her doing this on a yearly basis. She would then use this money for our gifts under the tree. Seemed insane to me then, and insane to me now.
*Not about my family per se, but I also cannot stand the people my age (around 25-35) who use the winter holiday to buy gifts for themselves, essentially using the holidays as an excuse to spend frivolously on things they wouldn't otherwise buy.
**Also, going even farther afield, when on Earth did Birthdays turn into weekends? As in, "Its my birthday weekend this weekend, so I am taking Friday off, and celebrating Friday and Saturday." Gross.
ETA: Fixed my age range. I am not as close to 12 as I wish I was.
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This is not exactly in the spirit of this thread, but I have sort of lucked out in this department, in that my MIL is a Jehovah's Witness. So we do not have a Christmas holiday with that side of the family, and hence do not have any Christmas gift-buying traditions with them at all. (Yay!) Plus, my husband, having been raised JW, doesn't give a shit about the holiday, which means that between us, we also do not give each other gifts. (Double yay!)
On my side, both my parents are deceased, and I am an only child. So, no gift-giving on that side, either. (Not exactly a yay, but...)
We give gifts to my two stepdaughters and their partners (usually money or gift cards), and my younger stepdaughter's two young children. And I also have a group of three friends I cave and exchange gifts with, mostly because one of the friends is a big "gifts as love language" person. Finally, we also sometimes exchange gifts with our two best couple friends if we happen to be spending Christmas day with them (as we are this year).
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I have discovered stroopwafels this year and have plans to consume them at insane levels at each given chance. :P
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This is not exactly in the spirit of this thread, but I have sort of lucked out in this department, in that my MIL is a Jehovah's Witness. So we do not have a Christmas holiday with that side of the family, and hence do not have any Christmas gift-buying traditions with them at all. (Yay!) Plus, my husband, having been raised JW, doesn't give a shit about the holiday, which means that between us, we also do not give each other gifts. (Double yay!)
On my side, both my parents are deceased, and I am an only child. So, no gift-giving on that side, either. (Not exactly a yay, but...)
We give gifts to my two stepdaughters and their partners (usually money or gift cards), and my younger stepdaughter's two young children. And I also have a group of three friends I cave and exchange gifts with, mostly because one of the friends is a big "gifts as love language" person. Finally, we also sometimes exchange gifts with our two best couple friends if we happen to be spending Christmas day with them (as we are this year).
I am almost comically jealous of you here. :) The whole gift give-a-palooza makes me want to throw up.
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This is not exactly in the spirit of this thread, but I have sort of lucked out in this department, in that my MIL is a Jehovah's Witness. So we do not have a Christmas holiday with that side of the family, and hence do not have any Christmas gift-buying traditions with them at all. (Yay!) Plus, my husband, having been raised JW, doesn't give a shit about the holiday, which means that between us, we also do not give each other gifts. (Double yay!)
On my side, both my parents are deceased, and I am an only child. So, no gift-giving on that side, either. (Not exactly a yay, but...)
We give gifts to my two stepdaughters and their partners (usually money or gift cards), and my younger stepdaughter's two young children. And I also have a group of three friends I cave and exchange gifts with, mostly because one of the friends is a big "gifts as love language" person. Finally, we also sometimes exchange gifts with our two best couple friends if we happen to be spending Christmas day with them (as we are this year).
I am almost comically jealous of you here. :) The whole gift give-a-palooza makes me want to throw up.
Yeah, it’s pretty great. Even giving gifts to our two grandsons, I am always struck at every Christmas or birthday what a ridiculous deluge of crap they must be getting. Between both sides of the families (both parents’ parents are divorced, so that’s four sets of grandparents alone) plus other friends and family… good lord, it’s freaking ridiculous. How do parents even have room to store all that crap? Seems like they would need to buy a bigger house just for all the toys? Ugh! 😑
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My ILs live out of the country, and don't celebrate the holiday, so no conflicts there. Our family is very trimmed down. Only kids get gifts, and there is a firm limit on cost ($50/pp). Our kids receive gifts from us, my parents ($50 limit) & my sister ($50 limit). That's it.
I'm not so big into birthday "weekends" & often work the day of my birthday. For my husband, it's a bigger deal. We typically plan a long weekend around his birthday anyway, to celebrate. I don't understand the disdain. It's the adjustment of a trip that we would have otherwise taken to celebrate. He loses vacation time every year, so we have plenty to use up on his birthday weekend.
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This is not exactly in the spirit of this thread, but I have sort of lucked out in this department, in that my MIL is a Jehovah's Witness. So we do not have a Christmas holiday with that side of the family, and hence do not have any Christmas gift-buying traditions with them at all. (Yay!) Plus, my husband, having been raised JW, doesn't give a shit about the holiday, which means that between us, we also do not give each other gifts. (Double yay!)
On my side, both my parents are deceased, and I am an only child. So, no gift-giving on that side, either. (Not exactly a yay, but...)
We give gifts to my two stepdaughters and their partners (usually money or gift cards), and my younger stepdaughter's two young children. And I also have a group of three friends I cave and exchange gifts with, mostly because one of the friends is a big "gifts as love language" person. Finally, we also sometimes exchange gifts with our two best couple friends if we happen to be spending Christmas day with them (as we are this year).
I am almost comically jealous of you here. :) The whole gift give-a-palooza makes me want to throw up.
Yeah, it’s pretty great. Even giving gifts to our two grandsons, I am always struck at every Christmas or birthday what a ridiculous deluge of crap they must be getting. Between both sides of the families (both parents’ parents are divorced, so that’s four sets of grandparents alone) plus other friends and family… good lord, it’s freaking ridiculous. How do parents even have room to store all that crap? Seems like they would need to buy a bigger house just for all the toys? Ugh! 😑
Its what the guest bedroom is for at my In-laws - storing all the gift-based garbage, lmao
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I'm not so big into birthday "weekends" & often work the day of my birthday. For my husband, it's a bigger deal. We typically plan a long weekend around his birthday anyway, to celebrate. I don't understand the disdain. It's the adjustment of a trip that we would have otherwise taken to celebrate. He loses vacation time every year, so we have plenty to use up on his birthday weekend.
I think the disdain might be more of a thing for the people I see around me in my age range. Taking a trip that happens to be around a birthday is fine. It is more the oddly casual, "Oh, its my birthday weekend," followed by an orgy of expensive consumption that really gets my goat. It is the behavior I expect out of 17 year olds, not 28-32 year old professionals, if that makes sense?
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@Hall11235 , One thing I do that mitigates the crapfest for us a little is, when I get a gift that I know I won’t use, I have a box in one of my closets that is specifically for regifting. I put a post-it note with the name of the person who gave it to me on the item, so I don’t accidentally give it back to them or to someone they know. To be honest, most of the gifts I receive go into that box these days. Then when I happen to need a random gift for someone, I can go “shopping” in the box.
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My parents no longer want anything except maybe some magazine subs, or restaurant gift cards. And even then, they'd just as soon not really bother. DH's parents couldn't care less, as well. They're all in the "no more crap" phase of life, which is wonderful. So we neither give nor receive. It's perfect. We don't bother giving to siblings, etc., either, and they don't give to us, either. They're all far away, so why really bother? We buy what we need and want all year round so come Christmas, we just kind of sit back and think about how content we are with that. If there's a work party (thank you Covid for ending that tradition!), we bring some food or booze and call it a day. It's very freeing and calm. We just enjoy the decorations and chill.
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I have discovered stroopwafels this year and have plans to consume them at insane levels at each given chance. :P
WTF? Based on your posts, you come across as well read, well traveled, and so on. Clearly that was a smokescreen you put up if you just discovered those delicious little treats.
I guess your expertise was but one square of one ply.
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I have discovered stroopwafels this year and have plans to consume them at insane levels at each given chance. :P
WTF? Based on your posts, you come across as well read, well traveled, and so on. Clearly that was a smokescreen you put up if you just discovered those delicious little treats.
I guess your expertise was but one square of one ply.
You should really come to the Netherlands........ stroopwafels on every corner of the street! (together with loads of chocolate, banketletter (pastry filled with an almond paste) and pepernoten (with or without chocolate) around "Sinterklaas" and "oliebollen" at New Years eve).
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My ILs used to buy the kids a ridiculous amount of gifts. Most were cheap things no one wanted. She wouldn't give us receipts, so we either had to try and return them for pennies on the dollar or just donate them. We were frustrated at having to store these things or the hassle of getting rid of them. ILs were frustrated that they didn't see the kids using or wearing their gifts. Words were spoken. They've toned it down a lot in the past few years since they retired and have a more limited income. We are much happier and they've started giving the kids money, which is their favorite color.
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I'm actually really looking forward to being together with my family this year, unlike most years. I think the main difference that's changed my outlook is that we'll all be on Maui.
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Didn't I read somewhere that there was a December cruise specifically for non-Christmas people? A getaway with no holiday decorations or music allowed, just an ordinary trip.
Sounds like a lovely experience for those who are burnt out on the whole thing but can't escape it otherwise.
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I have discovered stroopwafels this year and have plans to consume them at insane levels at each given chance. :P
WTF? Based on your posts, you come across as well read, well traveled, and so on. Clearly that was a smokescreen you put up if you just discovered those delicious little treats.
I guess your expertise was but one square of one ply.
You should really come to the Netherlands........ stroopwafels on every corner of the street! (together with loads of chocolate, banketletter (pastry filled with an almond paste) and pepernoten (with or without chocolate) around "Sinterklaas" and "oliebollen" at New Years eve).
I like that life can still surprise me in a good way occasionally.
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I have discovered stroopwafels this year and have plans to consume them at insane levels at each given chance. :P
WTF? Based on your posts, you come across as well read, well traveled, and so on. Clearly that was a smokescreen you put up if you just discovered those delicious little treats.
I guess your expertise was but one square of one ply.
You should really come to the Netherlands........ stroopwafels on every corner of the street! (together with loads of chocolate, banketletter (pastry filled with an almond paste) and pepernoten (with or without chocolate) around "Sinterklaas" and "oliebollen" at New Years eve).
Oooh, Dutch letters are one of my very favorite pastries of all time!!! (That's what they call banketletter in the Dutch communities of Iowa, not far from where I grew up.) Soooo delicious...
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I have discovered stroopwafels this year and have plans to consume them at insane levels at each given chance. :P
WTF? Based on your posts, you come across as well read, well traveled, and so on. Clearly that was a smokescreen you put up if you just discovered those delicious little treats.
I guess your expertise was but one square of one ply.
You should really come to the Netherlands........ stroopwafels on every corner of the street! (together with loads of chocolate, banketletter (pastry filled with an almond paste) and pepernoten (with or without chocolate) around "Sinterklaas" and "oliebollen" at New Years eve).
Oooh, Dutch letters are one of my very favorite pastries of all time!!! (That's what they call banketletter in the Dutch communities of Iowa, not far from where I grew up.) Soooo delicious...
Yeah, I had forgotten about the letters until going to the Des Moines farmers market last month. They were all over the place.
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Christmas with my family (parents and sibling, and now my spouse and sibling's spouse) is a huuuuge deal. It always has been. Thankfully, gifts in our family has always leaned toward the practical, or at least a luxurious version of practical. Everyone is very, very happy to get suggestions. My parents are the ones who buy the most (they can well afford it and it truly does bring them joy) so I try very hard to steer my mom. "I think DH would really enjoy a weather station." (He's a bit of weather nerd, having previously been a pilot, but this is not something he'd ever spring for himself. I do think he will get a lot of enjoyment out of it.) My sister and I also conspire and she will tell me something she wants and I will mention to my mom that when sister and I talked the other day, she told me her blender just died and I'm sure she'd like another one for Christmas. Mom seems to feel it is more exciting if a suggestion comes from me, versus directly from my sister, so sister and I have worked out that system.
So yes, many, many gifts are given, and much money is also spent. In addition to that, we almost always get a large check (4 figures). Yet somehow it doesn't manage to be wasteful. I never have to buy body lotion because mom gives it every year (purchased at deep discount when Bath and Body Works has a big sale). Things like that.
That's not to say things never miss the mark, but usually there is very little that will be wasted.
For those whose families insist on many gifts and/or much expense, can you at least find ways to guide them toward things you want or need? Maybe each family member sends out a list, or starts an Amazon list. If someone gifts you the new tires you need for your bike or the fancy hot chocolate you love but won't buy for yourself, it's a lot nicer!
Also, similar to what someone mentioned above, I keep a box of gifts, ready to regift as needed. These usually come from hostess gifts I receive of things from outside family, but it is nice to have a fancy hand lotion set in a scent I don't care for, or a candle, or a themed dishtowel set that I can just grab and throw in a (reused!) gift bag if I need a hostess gift or a last-minute present. Keeping track of who gave you what so you don't regift to the giver or within that same circle is important.
For reasons not worth explaining here, I was at one point given many cow-themed gifts. I couldn't really be less into any of that stuff, but it was related to a position I held and traditionally, gifts are given to the new C.O.W. Thankfully, it's a position I knew many other people were in, and would be in. The COW dish towels, kitchen timer, slippers, milk creamer, pens, statues, lawn decor, and probably many others I'm forgetting went directly in to the gift box. And my go-to gift is a donation to heifer international--cow-themed but not useless crap--if I need something more substantial. I'm out of them now and have several dear friends who are about to be in that position, and I'll need to buy gifts. But I'm going with stuff they will use--likely beef spices which stays close to the cow-theme but is hopefully usable, so they aren't stuck like I was. But as the first Cow of the friend group, I've also advised them to save all that stuff because they too will be needing to give many cow gifts in the coming years. Sometimes I've wondered just how many homes some of those items have been in. Some people in the position REALLY lean into it and I'm sure use most of the things they get, but some are like me.
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My sister and her husband don't give gifts at Christmas and actually fast on Christmas day as an anti-consumer protest. My in-laws are frugal but like to give stuff - I don't want any more stuff.
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For reasons not worth explaining here, I was at one point given many cow-themed gifts.
Moo. @Ma’am.
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DH and I are at opposite ends of the gifting spectrum.
I love to get gifts that are practical while he loves gifts that are more frivolous. So I LOVED getting a vacuum, knife block, bakeware, and mini spatulas in previous years but he HATES to shop for practical things. Oddly I feel uncomfortable “splurging” on these things for myself.
Every year I try hard to surprise DH and not be so practical. But he still ends up with a sweatshirt I know he will love, headphones to replace the broken ones, or funny new pj pants since the elastic wore out of his. My compromise is frivolous stocking stuffers - candy, lottery tickets, and gift cards to restaurants.
Thankfully we have one practical kid and one “wild idea” kid so we each take the one most like ourself to be the major shopper.
Now if we could get to a point that we didn’t feel obligated to get gifts for my in-laws….. They are just impossible to shop for since they buy everything they want as soon as they think of it.
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MIL is a big gifter, which has been a double edge sword. That's her way of showing affection, and Christmas morning is full of things to open. Since we don't live in the same area, that usually means a lot of "stuff" to haul back home. On the other hand, her constant gift giving means she's had a lot of practice and is the only person who can buy me clothes. I can't stand holidays in the sense that according to Hallmark, Hershey, and whatever is advertised on TV, I should be buying a lot of stuff every couple months. If my wife and son need something throughout the year, I'll get it for them. I don't feel the need to wait for a particular day. This week I refurbished one of my old phones to give him for gaming and Youtube. It cost me nothing and he's happy as can be with a bigger screen and more recent OS to support his games. I suppose I could have put a bow on it. I'll try to do something nice for them on their birthdays, but I don't feel compelled to buy anything. He's already receiving packages of clothes, and I'm sure checks are in the mail. With us living overseas, the extended family got the hint that more "stuff" just isn't helpful right now. My wife feels like she needs to get "something" for a long list of people. I think she gets some of that from her mother. Over the years I've whittled that down to something small and preferably consumable for a lot of the people on her list. She'll still get me something for birthday and Christmas, and in return I'll pretty much ask her what I'm getting for her and then wrap it. The most difficult part of Christmas is SIL. Love her to death. She makes several times what I do and it shows through their gift giving. It's a struggle sometimes to not come off as cheap when our two families are doing something together or sending a Christmas gift in exchange that doesn't look pitiful.
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My sister and her husband don't give gifts at Christmas and actually fast on Christmas day as an anti-consumer protest.
Oh man that's such a good idea. I'd love to do this but it'd upset too many people in my family. I'll suggest this to my wife for shock value
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My sister and her husband don't give gifts at Christmas and actually fast on Christmas day as an anti-consumer protest.
Oh man that's such a good idea. I'd love to do this but it'd upset too many people in my family. I'll suggest this to my wife for shock value
The best part about Christmas fasting is the enhanced impact of alcohol. Very useful for family gatherings.
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My sister and her husband don't give gifts at Christmas and actually fast on Christmas day as an anti-consumer protest.
Oh man that's such a good idea. I'd love to do this but it'd upset too many people in my family. I'll suggest this to my wife for shock value
Myself, my ex and her two sisters years ago decided to spice up Easter by making thai food at MIL's house. It was so shocking and upsetting that she got a severe migraine and spent the holiday in bed.
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I'm very fortunate. It's just me and my parents and we're all kind of relaxed. I think Mom is buying Daddy a succulent this year. Most of the gifts I get them are locally produced goodies, like toffee and fancy soap. Daddy has a sweet tooth, and Mom likes the scents. I used to knit them shawls and scarves, but I don't think they cared much for those.
I'm making a friend a sign that says 'Make More Music.' It's going to be bright and colorful, much like her. I'll take another friend for coffee. My housemate is getting pretty placemats since she's getting married in a few months and those are nice to have for a house.
I've been difficult to shop for since I was a teenager. This year I asked for helping funding a trip to Portugal in 2022 (which, trust me, my parents can afford).
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This year will be interesting, as it's the first time we won't be gathering and holding festivities at my parents' house (they've both passed, and the house is on the market). My fiancée is Jewish, so no Xmas traditions on her side obviously, but she's encouraging me to come up with something (she knows it will be weird for me, and wants to establish some kind of new tradition to replace the one I've lost).
We also have a family trip planned right after the holiday, so there's still the possibility of presents being exchanged at some point. But most of us will be flying, so that limits what we can bring if we wind up doing it in person.
In previous years, my brother and SiL have established the annoying habit of buying everyone bags full of crap, err, "stocking stuffers", straight from the $1 bin at Wal-Mart and/or Target. Lots of useless plastic junk, candy no one needs, etc.
For several years, that was the bulk of their gift giving, even as the rest of the family bought more significant (and expensive) gifts for each other, including them. One year I finally got fed up, and bought similarly worthless trinkets for them --and of course that was the year they decided to splurge and buy us all real gifts?! I think they must have come into some money or something (they rarely talk about their finances, so it's hard to say).
In recent years, we've come to a sort of understanding, which mostly involves buying each other lots of booze :) But they still do the trinket bags, much to my annoyance.
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I don't think I will have a problem with that this year. Before FIL passed away, it was tradition for both of them to go big in giving gifts to kids, grandkids, as well as the kids expected to give big back. Kind of like an arms race of presents. It's still a lot of presents but since it's just MIL does feel toned down, and gifts more on the useful side.
I already talked to my immediate family and the idea is to do a white elephant exchange for the adults. I'll still give my Mom and sister something to open, but nothing major. And I already told my kids that it will be modest (for me, yes I still like buying xmas gifts). So far I bought youngest a down comforter (I'll let her open it Dec 1st). She also wants an alexa of some kind to listen to music, so either I or MIL are going to get that for her. I told my family NO socks for my oldest. I counted and she has 3 dozen pairs of socks (multiple years of getting socks for birthday and xmas presents). Both kids want various books, graphic novels so I do need to order some of those soon to make sure of availability. I'm really of the age, if I need something I can buy it myself. But I told my kids I'd like a new pair of gardening gloves as they have holes in the fingertips, and a hand pruner.
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My partner's mom is the big gift giver. I have never seen anything quite like Christmas with my partner's family. Giving gifts is clearly her love language. The first few years my partner and I were together, I wasn't able to attend their Christmas. But, the next time we'd go to their house, she'd have a jumbo pile of presents for me, and would pull up a chair in front of where I was sitting so she could watch me unwrap each one. Oh boy. Intimidating, and so unlike anything I was used to. (It weirded me out - is THIS what my partner expected?!) But over time I've come around that she genuinely loves this, and she is the only one in his family to go crazy like this, so I'm not going to get in her way.
My partner and I also have the divide on practical vs fun gifts. I like practical gifts - I have requested a sonicare and a vacuum (with attachments!) for presents in the past. Both things (like someone said upthread) that I would hesitate to buy for myself for some unknown reason. But my partner thinks practical gifts are so boring and not for presents. One year he bought me a kayak, and this year he got me a hammock stand for my birthday. Luckily, both he and his mom are good at giving gifts.
My family, however, does smaller stuff, and we've all agreed not to buy presents for adults for Christmas. My brother's wife has called us all cheap. (She was shocked that when she and my brother got married, I gave them a check with the same amount that Her brother gave them...) Win some, lose some.
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My partner's mom is the big gift giver. I have never seen anything quite like Christmas with my partner's family. Giving gifts is clearly her love language. The first few years my partner and I were together, I wasn't able to attend their Christmas. But, the next time we'd go to their house, she'd have a jumbo pile of presents for me, and would pull up a chair in front of where I was sitting so she could watch me unwrap each one. Oh boy. Intimidating, and so unlike anything I was used to. (It weirded me out - is THIS what my partner expected?!) But over time I've come around that she genuinely loves this, and she is the only one in his family to go crazy like this, so I'm not going to get in her way.
My partner and I also have the divide on practical vs fun gifts. I like practical gifts - I have requested a sonicare and a vacuum (with attachments!) for presents in the past. Both things (like someone said upthread) that I would hesitate to buy for myself for some unknown reason. But my partner thinks practical gifts are so boring and not for presents. One year he bought me a kayak, and this year he got me a hammock stand for my birthday. Luckily, both he and his mom are good at giving gifts.
My family, however, does smaller stuff, and we've all agreed not to buy presents for adults for Christmas. My brother's wife has called us all cheap. (She was shocked that when she and my brother got married, I gave them a check with the same amount that Her brother gave them...) Win some, lose some.
I think this is so important. My mom clearly gets so much about giving gifts to her adult children. (There are no grandchildren.) My parents can very easily afford the extravagance. With direction, usually we can prevent too much waste. So I embrace it. Getting excited about all the gifts and generosity is a gift back to my mother. I can't think of a good reason to deprive her of that. My sister struggles a bit more with that perspective, but I love how much joy my mom gets about giving me soup mixes (that I wouldn't buy, but that we do really like and certainly get used!) and socks and a sweater (even if I don't need another sweater, it gets worn so it does prolong the life of everything else) and pajamas and a book and a bottle of alcohol and...
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I didn't even know people gave multiple gifts for Christmas until my SIL showed me her tree one year! And then I learned about stocking stuffers. Which by the time the stocking is stuffed, has got to be at least $20-50 (or more).
It is fun opening presents on Christmas morning though. A few presents. After 5-6 gifts, my eyes cross and I am overwhelmed.
I've asked DS19 and DD20 what they want and both say they don't need anything. So I just talked to DH that this year, we should trade dollar store presents between our young adult kids and ourselves simply for the fun of a few gifts.
One wrinkle is that my mom is the lover of gifts (both receiving and giving) and she lives with us so we will all be together Christmas morning. My plan is to make sure everyone gives "real" gifts to my mother. It will be slightly weird - but she knows my opinions on gifts.
Sent from my VCE-AL00 using Tapatalk
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I have discovered stroopwafels this year and have plans to consume them at insane levels at each given chance. :P
WTF? Based on your posts, you come across as well read, well traveled, and so on. Clearly that was a smokescreen you put up if you just discovered those delicious little treats.
I guess your expertise was but one square of one ply.
You should really come to the Netherlands........ stroopwafels on every corner of the street! (together with loads of chocolate, banketletter (pastry filled with an almond paste) and pepernoten (with or without chocolate) around "Sinterklaas" and "oliebollen" at New Years eve).
Oooh, Dutch letters are one of my very favorite pastries of all time!!! (That's what they call banketletter in the Dutch communities of Iowa, not far from where I grew up.) Soooo delicious...
Yeah, I had forgotten about the letters until going to the Des Moines farmers market last month. They were all over the place.
Tulip festival! They are also in some stores now in Des Moines - I have seen them, but cannot remember where.
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I have discovered stroopwafels this year and have plans to consume them at insane levels at each given chance. :P
Good shit. They're soooo good.
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I didn't even know people gave multiple gifts for Christmas until my SIL showed me her tree one year! And then I learned about stocking stuffers. Which by the time the stocking is stuffed, has got to be at least $20-50 (or more).
"All the stockings were hung by the chimney with care
in hopes that Saint Nicholas soon would be there"
I'm brainwashed, I did that from memory. ;-)
Stocking are great when you have little kids, they can open all the little presents in them and play with the little toys and eat the mandarin orange in the toe, and parents can get to sleep a bit longer.
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My DW and my families are all in other countries which removes the gift giving issue. We do have a tradition of gifting Christmas ornaments though and in my case greatly aided by having a 3D printer allowing the creation of personalised ones.
As it is just my DW and I for Christmas Day, we host dinner for a number of other Christmas orphans who have no local family which can be from 3 -5 depending on circumstance. As for gift giving since there is only the two of us DW buys me a few small gifts while I am Mr. Meany and only buy her one as her birthday, our wedding anniversary and Christmas all fall within 10 days and I buy her something she needs such as this year replacement for her 6 year old phone that is starting to play up.
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I didn't even know people gave multiple gifts for Christmas until my SIL showed me her tree one year! And then I learned about stocking stuffers. Which by the time the stocking is stuffed, has got to be at least $20-50 (or more).
"All the stockings were hung by the chimney with care
in hopes that Saint Nicholas soon would be there"
I'm brainwashed, I did that from memory. ;-)
Stocking are great when you have little kids, they can open all the little presents in them and play with the little toys and eat the mandarin orange in the toe, and parents can get to sleep a bit longer.
They buy time to get coffee and breakfast started.
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We've been slowly transitioning our families to experiences. We started with us telling people we just wanted $ for travel. At first they were resistant but we'd send them a picture from somewhere with a caption "You just bought us this great meal in Brussels. Thank you!" or "Thanks for covering the Airbnb so we could hike this mountain!". We're now buying experiences for others. I'm taking my mom to a concert, my SIL is getting a GC for a massage etc
That said I still put a few small items on my list because people still want us to have a small number of things. So it's stuff I need and would buy myself but can wait a little bit. My list this year includes new ratchet straps because a couple are fraying and a driver's side windshield wiper. Past gifts have included a $6 power strip and a $4 pack of 1' ethernet cables. It's become a bit of a humorous tradition
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I didn't even know people gave multiple gifts for Christmas until my SIL showed me her tree one year! And then I learned about stocking stuffers. Which by the time the stocking is stuffed, has got to be at least $20-50 (or more).
"All the stockings were hung by the chimney with care
in hopes that Saint Nicholas soon would be there"
I'm brainwashed, I did that from memory. ;-)
Stocking are great when you have little kids, they can open all the little presents in them and play with the little toys and eat the mandarin orange in the toe, and parents can get to sleep a bit longer.
They buy time to get coffee and breakfast started.
Oh. So kids can dive into their stockings without parents present? So much for me to learn!
I used put some candy into small stockings. The big stockings get hung up and stay empty. I obviously did Christmas wrong LOL!
Sent from my VCE-AL00 using Tapatalk
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Unfortunately, we're spending Christmas this year with a very materialistic and spendy branch of the family. I have one particular wealthy shopaholic aunt who eggs everyone else on and buys ridiculous amounts of stuff for the holidays. She also gets extremely insulted if others don't buy presents for her, even though it's basically impossible as she has every possible thing that she could possibly want/need.
She has one of those dogs that is like her child as she doesn't have kids. I remember one year another family member was freaking out on Christmas morning as we'd 'forgotten to buy a present for the dog and "she'll be so upset". So the family member took the child's fabric ball that my toddler was playing with at the time an wrapped that up for the dog's present. I suggested a can of dog food but that didn't go down well. Apparently this dog only eats some kind of home made extra gourmet dog food that her "parents" make for her.
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Unfortunately, we're spending Christmas this year with a very materialistic and spendy branch of the family. I have one particular wealthy shopaholic aunt who eggs everyone else on and buys ridiculous amounts of stuff for the holidays. She also gets extremely insulted if others don't buy presents for her, even though it's basically impossible as she has every possible thing that she could possibly want/need.
My mother was kinda like that. Mostly because she expected lavish gifts from my brother and I. When I pointed out my brother was struggling financially, she said she gave him very generous gifts of money and he should turn around and spend some of that money on her. I cannot wrap my head around that thinking.
She's gotten sooo much better now. She never used to appreciate my brother and SIL's elaborate handmade/personalized gifts. But after I lectured and lectured for many many years, she has now gained a genuine appreciation for inexpensive gifts made with love.
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I didn't even know people gave multiple gifts for Christmas until my SIL showed me her tree one year! And then I learned about stocking stuffers. Which by the time the stocking is stuffed, has got to be at least $20-50 (or more).
"All the stockings were hung by the chimney with care
in hopes that Saint Nicholas soon would be there"
I'm brainwashed, I did that from memory. ;-)
Stocking are great when you have little kids, they can open all the little presents in them and play with the little toys and eat the mandarin orange in the toe, and parents can get to sleep a bit longer.
They buy time to get coffee and breakfast started.
Oh. So kids can dive into their stockings without parents present? So much for me to learn!
I used put some candy into small stockings. The big stockings get hung up and stay empty. I obviously did Christmas wrong LOL!
Sent from my VCE-AL00 using Tapatalk
My mom always bought a bunch of candy and little things (deck of playing cards, silly putty, etc.), wrapped each one, and packed it into a big stocking to buy her and my dad a bit more sleep time on Christmas morning. I was given instructions to unpack and unwrap the stocking and only then wake them up.
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We used to do a $50 Secret Santa for the adults. In advance of Christmas one year I briefly converted to Festivus and had an airing of the grievances when I demanded that:
(A) I get a 2-year holiday from getting gifts from a notoriously cheap cousin (shows up to weddings without a gift), adding that
(B) my mom and aunts were screwing me by always making him my Secret Santa
(C) the $50 limit is not really a LIMIT
(D) a $25 gift (always a gift card) is fine if it's thoughtful, but you can't be both cheap and thoughtless
So his mom told him, and I was blamed for the dissolution of the Secret Santa.
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My favorite Christmas story was one I heard on the radio one time. The parents started turning the clocks back when they went to bed Christmas Eve, and then told the kids they had to wait until (some reasonable time) to wake them up, thereby getting an extra hour of sleep. Then during the day sometime they would surreptitiously put the clocks right. They expected to get caught at it eventually but never did, so they kept it up as a secret family tradition. As teenagers the kids would muse about how short Christmas day always seemed, but still didn't catch on. They were finally let into the secret when they came home from college. The daughter told the story while laughing so all's well that ends well.
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Unfortunately, we're spending Christmas this year with a very materialistic and spendy branch of the family. I have one particular wealthy shopaholic aunt who eggs everyone else on and buys ridiculous amounts of stuff for the holidays. She also gets extremely insulted if others don't buy presents for her, even though it's basically impossible as she has every possible thing that she could possibly want/need.
She has one of those dogs that is like her child as she doesn't have kids. I remember one year another family member was freaking out on Christmas morning as we'd 'forgotten to buy a present for the dog and "she'll be so upset". So the family member took the child's fabric ball that my toddler was playing with at the time an wrapped that up for the dog's present. I suggested a can of dog food but that didn't go down well. Apparently this dog only eats some kind of home made extra gourmet dog food that her "parents" make for her.
This sounds like absolute hell. I think I would just rather burn the bridge...
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Unfortunately, we're spending Christmas this year with a very materialistic and spendy branch of the family. I have one particular wealthy shopaholic aunt who eggs everyone else on and buys ridiculous amounts of stuff for the holidays. She also gets extremely insulted if others don't buy presents for her, even though it's basically impossible as she has every possible thing that she could possibly want/need.
She has one of those dogs that is like her child as she doesn't have kids. I remember one year another family member was freaking out on Christmas morning as we'd 'forgotten to buy a present for the dog and "she'll be so upset". So the family member took the child's fabric ball that my toddler was playing with at the time an wrapped that up for the dog's present. I suggested a can of dog food but that didn't go down well. Apparently this dog only eats some kind of home made extra gourmet dog food that her "parents" make for her.
This sounds like absolute hell. I think I would just rather burn the bridge...
OMG. I do have a picture in my mind that the dog wears a christmas vest or sweater, or at least a holiday-themed collar.
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Unfortunately, we're spending Christmas this year with a very materialistic and spendy branch of the family. I have one particular wealthy shopaholic aunt who eggs everyone else on and buys ridiculous amounts of stuff for the holidays. She also gets extremely insulted if others don't buy presents for her, even though it's basically impossible as she has every possible thing that she could possibly want/need.
She has one of those dogs that is like her child as she doesn't have kids. I remember one year another family member was freaking out on Christmas morning as we'd 'forgotten to buy a present for the dog and "she'll be so upset". So the family member took the child's fabric ball that my toddler was playing with at the time an wrapped that up for the dog's present. I suggested a can of dog food but that didn't go down well. Apparently this dog only eats some kind of home made extra gourmet dog food that her "parents" make for her.
This sounds like absolute hell. I think I would just rather burn the bridge...
OMG. I do have a picture in my mind that the dog wears a christmas vest or sweater, or at least a holiday-themed collar.
Dogs need to dress up for Christmas pictures. It's a good rule.
We had reindeer antlers for our dog that strapped around her head. Second year that we tried putting them on her, she ran away as fast as she could to a dark corner, clawed them off her head, and ripped them to shreds. That's when we moved the Santa robe:
(https://live.staticflickr.com/5504/11553120353_741a115c5a.jpg)
"Dear God, why is this happening again???"
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I didn't even know people gave multiple gifts for Christmas until my SIL showed me her tree one year! And then I learned about stocking stuffers. Which by the time the stocking is stuffed, has got to be at least $20-50 (or more).
"All the stockings were hung by the chimney with care
in hopes that Saint Nicholas soon would be there"
I'm brainwashed, I did that from memory. ;-)
Stocking are great when you have little kids, they can open all the little presents in them and play with the little toys and eat the mandarin orange in the toe, and parents can get to sleep a bit longer.
They buy time to get coffee and breakfast started.
Oh. So kids can dive into their stockings without parents present? So much for me to learn!
I used put some candy into small stockings. The big stockings get hung up and stay empty. I obviously did Christmas wrong LOL!
Sent from my VCE-AL00 using Tapatalk
Obviously, varies by family. In my family, the stocking presents could be opened whenever you got up, but tree presents you had to wait until everyone was up. Mom and dad had a rule that we kids couldn't wake them up before whatever time. Kids got to open some stuff, parents got to sleep to a more reasonable hour.
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38 years ago, I discovered that my wife (of 37 years), celebrated Christmas on a fairly high budget... Choices had to be made... Decided that Christmas spending was not a hill "winable" or worth dying on. YMMV.
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A VERY wealthy woman I know is related to some other friends of mine. She has a habit of attending their annual family Christmas parties and passing out $100 dollar bills. Thing is, she's so rich, it's like an average person giving out $1 bills. FFS, she drives a $200k car! And no, it is not leased, lol.
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Unfortunately, we're spending Christmas this year with a very materialistic and spendy branch of the family. I have one particular wealthy shopaholic aunt who eggs everyone else on and buys ridiculous amounts of stuff for the holidays. She also gets extremely insulted if others don't buy presents for her, even though it's basically impossible as she has every possible thing that she could possibly want/need.
She has one of those dogs that is like her child as she doesn't have kids. I remember one year another family member was freaking out on Christmas morning as we'd 'forgotten to buy a present for the dog and "she'll be so upset". So the family member took the child's fabric ball that my toddler was playing with at the time an wrapped that up for the dog's present. I suggested a can of dog food but that didn't go down well. Apparently this dog only eats some kind of home made extra gourmet dog food that her "parents" make for her.
This sounds like absolute hell. I think I would just rather burn the bridge...
Good lord. My husband and I are infertile and have known that we are for 17 years. Our pets (currently, 2 cats, 1 rabbit) are not our kids. They have no idea what Christmas is, and they only know about Thanksgiving because the roasting turkey smells good. If someone wanted to give them a fun gift, that would be fine. They would love the gift but would be blissfully unaware of its absence.
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38 years ago, I discovered that my wife (of 37 years), celebrated Christmas on a fairly high budget... Choices had to be made... Decided that Christmas spending was not a hill "winable" or worth dying on. YMMV.
Giving at Christmas must have meant a lot to her. And I bet she always made it awesome.
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Unfortunately, we're spending Christmas this year with a very materialistic and spendy branch of the family. I have one particular wealthy shopaholic aunt who eggs everyone else on and buys ridiculous amounts of stuff for the holidays. She also gets extremely insulted if others don't buy presents for her, even though it's basically impossible as she has every possible thing that she could possibly want/need.
She has one of those dogs that is like her child as she doesn't have kids. I remember one year another family member was freaking out on Christmas morning as we'd 'forgotten to buy a present for the dog and "she'll be so upset". So the family member took the child's fabric ball that my toddler was playing with at the time an wrapped that up for the dog's present. I suggested a can of dog food but that didn't go down well. Apparently this dog only eats some kind of home made extra gourmet dog food that her "parents" make for her.
This sounds like absolute hell. I think I would just rather burn the bridge...
OMG. I do have a picture in my mind that the dog wears a christmas vest or sweater, or at least a holiday-themed collar.
Dogs need to dress up for Christmas pictures. It's a good rule.
We had reindeer antlers for our dog that strapped around her head. Second year that we tried putting them on her, she ran away as fast as she could to a dark corner, clawed them off her head, and ripped them to shreds. That's when we moved the Santa robe:
(https://live.staticflickr.com/5504/11553120353_741a115c5a.jpg)
"Dear God, why is this happening again???"
. Lol I have to say, AW
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When I was young we had stockings hung by the fireplace in the living room, but we also had door stockings tied on our bedroom doors. They were about 6 or 7 inches high...just big enough to hold a candy cane and one toy, like a miniature deck of playing cards, to occupy us until 7 a.m. when we were allowed to wake our parents. We were not supposed to go into the living room before then. But I always woke up early and one of my favorite things was to go into the living room and sit there for a while...just enjoying the tree and packages, and then go back to my bedroom before anyone else woke up.
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I remember me and my siblings on the days running up to Christmas, us looking at, arranging and sorting the presents under the tree by who they were for, try to figure out what they were. The anticipation was all part of the enjoyment it it. And feeling rich with gifts
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After the year that my sisters and I all gave each other gift cards (living in different states, so no idea what anyone wanted or needed), we called a moratorium. We only gave gifts to our parents and to our nephew who was still a kid.
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After the year that my sisters and I all gave each other gift cards (living in different states, so no idea what anyone wanted or needed), we called a moratorium. We only gave gifts to our parents and to our nephew who was still a kid.
I have a serious problem with gift cards. Giving a gift card is like giving someone shitty money.
"Here's some money!"
"Nice!"
"But you can only spend it at a store of my choosing."
"Oh . . . thanks . . . I guess?"
Somehow marketers have convinced people that giving limited money is somehow better than giving real money, and it's fucking weird.
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I have a feeling I may be posting here soon as we're going to have a big family Christmas for the first time in a long time this year (with vaccines, testing etc.) I have one particular aunt who is a complete shopaholic and who also expects presents. I've bought everyone Italian chocolate. They have enough stuff already so it's consumables this year.
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After the year that my sisters and I all gave each other gift cards (living in different states, so no idea what anyone wanted or needed), we called a moratorium. We only gave gifts to our parents and to our nephew who was still a kid.
I have a serious problem with gift cards. Giving a gift card is like giving someone shitty money.
"Here's some money!"
"Nice!"
"But you can only spend it at a store of my choosing."
"Oh . . . thanks . . . I guess?"
Somehow marketers have convinced people that giving limited money is somehow better than giving real money, and it's fucking weird.
You can just do VISA gift cards. I don't like to limit people's choices either, so that's what I get them.
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After the year that my sisters and I all gave each other gift cards (living in different states, so no idea what anyone wanted or needed), we called a moratorium. We only gave gifts to our parents and to our nephew who was still a kid.
I have a serious problem with gift cards. Giving a gift card is like giving someone shitty money.
"Here's some money!"
"Nice!"
"But you can only spend it at a store of my choosing."
"Oh . . . thanks . . . I guess?"
Somehow marketers have convinced people that giving limited money is somehow better than giving real money, and it's fucking weird.
You can just do VISA gift cards. I don't like to limit people's choices either, so that's what I get them.
Visa gift card -
"Here's some money!"
"Nice!"
"But because it's a Visa gift card you get less money than if I gave you cash. And there might be an activation fee depending on where I bought it."
"Oh . . . thanks . . . I guess?"
ANY gift cards always seem to come out as the worse option than cash. They've been very successfully marketed as somehow better than giving real money though . . . which bothers me deep down in the cockles of my heart. Maybe even in the sub-cockle area.
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My immediate family used to have every member buy every other member a gift. There are 6 of us, and once SOs came in to the picture, it swelled to 9 or 10. This was on top of the stuffed stockings for everyone too. I never cared for doing it this way. My GF suggested we draw one name out of a hat each and get that person a gift, which I was immediately on board with. Same with the rest of my family, so that's what we've done the past few years.
This year we shifted again and all the sibs (+ SOs) donated to a charity. I'm still getting my brother something too, but it's more of a gag gift. But we still get gifts for the nieces and nephews because hey, that's fun for everyone (plus it gives me an excuse to "help" with the star wars lego sets).
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After the year that my sisters and I all gave each other gift cards (living in different states, so no idea what anyone wanted or needed), we called a moratorium. We only gave gifts to our parents and to our nephew who was still a kid.
I have a serious problem with gift cards. Giving a gift card is like giving someone shitty money.
"Here's some money!"
"Nice!"
"But you can only spend it at a store of my choosing."
"Oh . . . thanks . . . I guess?"
Somehow marketers have convinced people that giving limited money is somehow better than giving real money, and it's fucking weird.
You can just do VISA gift cards. I don't like to limit people's choices either, so that's what I get them.
Visa gift card -
"Here's some money!"
"Nice!"
"But because it's a Visa gift card you get less money than if I gave you cash. And there might be an activation fee depending on where I bought it."
"Oh . . . thanks . . . I guess?"
ANY gift cards always seem to come out as the worse option than cash. They've been very successfully marketed as somehow better than giving real money though . . . which bothers me deep down in the cockles of my heart. Maybe even in the sub-cockle area.
My only defense of gift cards is that - assuming the store is one that I generally like - it's better for me to have money set aside for that particular indulgence. If someone gives me cash, I have a very hard time "treating" myself with it. It automatically gets put into my "don't spend!" mindset. Whereas if someone gives me a gift card, I'll go and enjoy having those free dollars to indulge a bit.
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We have one set of nieces and nephews that expect to get everything on their list. We have watched the parents argue about going over budget *and* the grandparents argue about whether or not they are going to bail them out.
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My sister's kids only wanted Gamestop gift cards. I tried giving more interesting (to me) gifts, but gave up after witnessing the disappointment, lol.
One year I gave my nephew his card but it was packed "russian doll" style, big box, smaller box, etc. I thought it would be funny, and the nephew has a unique sense of humor (he's "on the spectrum", fwiw.)
Everyone was laughing, and he was laughing, as each opened box revealed another fully wrapped gift box, until the final box, which was a cell phone box. It was the smallest box I could find.
His eyes lit up when he saw the box, but when he opened it and found the Gamestop card he ran from the room crying! Turns out he had been bugging his folks for his first phone but they decided he was too young. He was so disappointed and I felt terrible.
He got me back a few years later with his own prank, so all was well, and it lives on in the family lore.
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My only defense of gift cards is that - assuming the store is one that I generally like - it's better for me to have money set aside for that particular indulgence. If someone gives me cash, I have a very hard time "treating" myself with it. It automatically gets put into my "don't spend!" mindset. Whereas if someone gives me a gift card, I'll go and enjoy having those free dollars to indulge a bit.
My MIL gives me gift cards to a store that sells women's clothes, because she wants me to have something nice for me. If she gives me a check she doesn't trust me to spend it on myself. (And she's not wrong, lol.)
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My only defense of gift cards is that - assuming the store is one that I generally like - it's better for me to have money set aside for that particular indulgence. If someone gives me cash, I have a very hard time "treating" myself with it. It automatically gets put into my "don't spend!" mindset. Whereas if someone gives me a gift card, I'll go and enjoy having those free dollars to indulge a bit.
My MIL gives me gift cards to a store that sells women's clothes, because she wants me to have something nice for me. If she gives me a check she doesn't trust me to spend it on myself. (And she's not wrong, lol.)
Yeah this is me too. If I were to get cash, I just wouldn’t spend it. But gift cards, especially for clothes, ensure that I get something I want in the right size, and that *I actually get it*. But usually it’s the kind of thing where I say to someone who asks what Id want “oh I’d like a gift card to buy something from X clothing store”, so it’s still the store of my choice. A random gift card to somewhere the buyer just picked isn’t as thoughtful.
Edit to add: gift cards can also be useful when you know someone wants something out of your budget or just exorbitant. An apple gift card can be used towards an iPad without you having to buy a whole iPad for example. But that also requires more though than just “buy whatever gift card is closest in the checkout line”.
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For more than one occasion, I've given my sister or BIL an American Airlines gift card. They travel frequently and AA is their preferred carrier, but they also have a travel budget. $50 that goes toward their airfare is $50 more they can spend on an excursion or something else. If I just gave them $50, I know they wouldn't give themselves permission to go over budget.
So sure, money (unlike gift cards, sort of) is fungible. But sometimes people need or want a mental excuse to splurge when they otherwise might not allow themselves to do that. I don't think there's anything wrong with that, but I think you do have to be thoughtful about the recipient and now what works best for them
We also sometimes give MIL a gift card for a restaurant we know she likes and frequents. In her case, it's not that she wouldn't go there anyway, but her pride would never allow her to accept cash from us. I think she'd actually be somewhat offended if we tried to give her money. But somehow a gift card is okay even though it just pays for a meal she would eat anyway and pay cash for, so the overall effect to the finances would be the same.
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Ex-JW here. I could care less about the holidays.
DH’s family is big into Christmas. Everyone has more than they need, and we have more than the rest of them financially. We moved away from all family 3 years ago. So we are in VA, and they are in IL This year, it’s matching Lands End PJs for the lot of them. Zoom call coordinated Xmas morning in their matching Jammie’s (or robes for those who don’t fit Jammie’s) is the plan. When we lived in Illinois, we used to put everyone up in a hotel (points) and buy brunch for everyone at a nice restaurant as our gift. That was honestly way easier. So next year, it will probably be a family experience gift again. The random excess they send our way generally boggles my mind.
My side, it’s one aunt and grandma that celebrate and we just do tea towels or cookies for the most part. My grandma wins because hers are hand embroidered. I tried to learn one year, but my towel looked as if a two-year old did the work. My sister and I do gift cards for the kids that we put the others names on. So she buys her kids Disney gift cards (from me), and I buy my kids equal gift cards for whatever store my kids might want. Yeah, we’re lazy.
I’d much prefer just to see and enjoy one another’s company versus all the gifts.
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After the year that my sisters and I all gave each other gift cards (living in different states, so no idea what anyone wanted or needed), we called a moratorium. We only gave gifts to our parents and to our nephew who was still a kid.
I have a serious problem with gift cards. Giving a gift card is like giving someone shitty money.
"Here's some money!"
"Nice!"
"But you can only spend it at a store of my choosing."
"Oh . . . thanks . . . I guess?"
Somehow marketers have convinced people that giving limited money is somehow better than giving real money, and it's fucking weird.
I only give gift cards when it's to introduce someone to something cool.
Like a gift card for a specific experience activity, or a specific restaurant. I gave my old boss a number of gift cards to kind of force her to do fun things. The gift was me doing the mental work for her of finding cool stuff she would enjoy, the gift card was to pressure her to actually go do it because she didn't want to waste the gift. She was always really grateful, but she enjoyed me being pushy and controlling. The first year I worked for her I bought her new clothes after saying her clothes sucked.
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We also sometimes give MIL a gift card for a restaurant we know she likes and frequents. In her case, it's not that she wouldn't go there anyway, but her pride would never allow her to accept cash from us. I think she'd actually be somewhat offended if we tried to give her money. But somehow a gift card is okay even though it just pays for a meal she would eat anyway and pay cash for, so the overall effect to the finances would be the same.
We do this with my ILs, too.
I think in their minds, a gift card to a restaurant says, "We want you to have a nice time out." It's kind of like those certificates little kids make for their parents that say "Valid for one hug" or "I will mop the floor." Cash to them says, "We're paying for something you can't pay for on your own." It's not entirely rational, but I share the feeling to some extent. A well-chosen gift card does demonstrate that thought went into the gift.
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We also sometimes give MIL a gift card for a restaurant we know she likes and frequents. In her case, it's not that she wouldn't go there anyway, but her pride would never allow her to accept cash from us. I think she'd actually be somewhat offended if we tried to give her money. But somehow a gift card is okay even though it just pays for a meal she would eat anyway and pay cash for, so the overall effect to the finances would be the same.
We do this with my ILs, too.
I think in their minds, a gift card to a restaurant says, "We want you to have a nice time out." It's kind of like those certificates little kids make for their parents that say "Valid for one hug" or "I will mop the floor." Cash to them says, "We're paying for something you can't pay for on your own." It's not entirely rational, but I share the feeling to some extent. A well-chosen gift card does demonstrate that thought went into the gift.
+1
My parents love gift cards for their local movie theater. It would be wasted on me though, unless you also want to watch my kids while I go to the movies.
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After the year that my sisters and I all gave each other gift cards (living in different states, so no idea what anyone wanted or needed), we called a moratorium. We only gave gifts to our parents and to our nephew who was still a kid.
I have a serious problem with gift cards. Giving a gift card is like giving someone shitty money.
"Here's some money!"
"Nice!"
"But you can only spend it at a store of my choosing."
"Oh . . . thanks . . . I guess?"
Somehow marketers have convinced people that giving limited money is somehow better than giving real money, and it's fucking weird.
You can just do VISA gift cards. I don't like to limit people's choices either, so that's what I get them.
Visa gift card -
"Here's some money!"
"Nice!"
"But because it's a Visa gift card you get less money than if I gave you cash. And there might be an activation fee depending on where I bought it."
"Oh . . . thanks . . . I guess?"
ANY gift cards always seem to come out as the worse option than cash. They've been very successfully marketed as somehow better than giving real money though . . . which bothers me deep down in the cockles of my heart. Maybe even in the sub-cockle area.
I thought I was being slick sending my niece and nephews gift cards one year, until I'm adding up my Christmas expenses and realized I spent $5 to gift $25. Now I just electronically send their mother the money and tell her to stick the cash in an envelope from me.
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I thought I was being slick sending my niece and nephews gift cards one year, until I'm adding up my Christmas expenses and realized I spent $5 to gift $25. Now I just electronically send their mother the money and tell her to stick the cash in an envelope from me.
This creates more work for your sister, though. I would only do this if I'd checked with her beforehand to make sure she was ok with it. (Not saying you didn't!)
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I thought I was being slick sending my niece and nephews gift cards one year, until I'm adding up my Christmas expenses and realized I spent $5 to gift $25. Now I just electronically send their mother the money and tell her to stick the cash in an envelope from me.
This creates more work for your sister, though. I would only do this if I'd checked with her beforehand to make sure she was ok with it. (Not saying you didn't!)
It's not without coordination. We've always lived hundreds/thousands of miles apart and we've always had an arrangement like that.
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I thought I was being slick sending my niece and nephews gift cards one year, until I'm adding up my Christmas expenses and realized I spent $5 to gift $25. Now I just electronically send their mother the money and tell her to stick the cash in an envelope from me.
This creates more work for your sister, though. I would only do this if I'd checked with her beforehand to make sure she was ok with it. (Not saying you didn't!)
This is exactly what my sister and I do. LOL. We write each others cards and include the $. Because it kind of ended up being silly to send gift cards back and forth when we didn't have to. Also, we had gift cards get stolen out of the mail one year, so it was an incentive to not do that again.
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Hi, all!
I was thinking, as we come into the worst part of the year (Christmas - blech), it might be fun to see who has the absolute wildest gift-giving traditions in their family. You got an aunt who gives out iPads every year? Let's hear about it!
I have two that come to mind:
1. My DW's family is insane. They are a bigger family (about 15 members all told at the house for Xmas day). It is a requirement that EVERY person buys EVERY other person a gift. Any suggestions about how bad this is for our wallets and the planet is usually met with either blank stares or eye rolls followed by condescending chuckles. The best my DW and I have been able to do after 5 years of cajoling is that we now buy and get gifts as a couple.
2. On my side of the family, for as far back as I can remember, my mother had her 'Christmas job.' Every year, after the school year would start, she would go out and find a min wage job somewhere (Target, Walmart, Starbucks, etc.), and would work there for 8-10 hours a week until the two weeks before Christmas. After I turned 14, she managed to find a gig at a local coffee shop that was cool with her doing this on a yearly basis. She would then use this money for our gifts under the tree. Seemed insane to me then, and insane to me now.
*Not about my family per se, but I also cannot stand the people my age (around 25-35) who use the winter holiday to buy gifts for themselves, essentially using the holidays as an excuse to spend frivolously on things they wouldn't otherwise buy.
**Also, going even farther afield, when on Earth did Birthdays turn into weekends? As in, "Its my birthday weekend this weekend, so I am taking Friday off, and celebrating Friday and Saturday." Gross.
ETA: Fixed my age range. I am not as close to 12 as I wish I was.
I think we can all agree that it seems a sad waste of her life and energy to spend all that time working for one pile of gifts. However I think it is commendable that she found a way to pay cash for those gifts. Most people just throw it on a credit card and worry about it in January!
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well i'm feeling cautiously optimistic. I always do spend more money on my kids than I intend to (that one -more thing I want to get them issue). But last year when I was telling my immediate family I didn't want anything, didin't give them ideas for presents, our family got literally 7 pounds of candies, chocolates, sweets etc. And since that is one area I have no self control I ended up eating the majority of those....
anyways my sis did send me some treats, but it was summer sausage and pate and crackers, and they were actually thoughtful, and I have to admit I already broke them open and having a nice snack for a few days. It looks like I will avoid the avalance of chocolate, the tsunami of socks, and otherwise will be modest on the gift front. Sis did send me her gift to me which is glass tupperware (I'm slowly replacing plastic with glass), and my Mom sent me a card. I already dropped off stocking stuffing type gifts to a few friends. The guy I see is going to take me out shopping for a new mattress at some point because he has a truck for transport, but not exchanging gifts. Anyways I really want to take a break from xmas preparations today and just sit on my ass and read a mystery. so that's def happening today or tomorrow. I have had a holiday party the last 2, 3 years. Obviously last years was canceled and I am going to skip this year as well, though I might meet people for a drink or a film during the break.
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I've been waiting for this article to be published since the day this thread was created!
https://defector.com/the-2021-haters-guide-to-the-williams-sonoma-catalog (https://defector.com/the-2021-haters-guide-to-the-williams-sonoma-catalog)
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I've been waiting for this article to be published since the day this thread was created!
https://defector.com/the-2021-haters-guide-to-the-williams-sonoma-catalog (https://defector.com/the-2021-haters-guide-to-the-williams-sonoma-catalog)
Blech, second time I've seen this posted but it's behind a paywall. I think I get the gist though.
I saw what looked like a paywall, but I was able to click it off.
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Most of the people I used to buy gifts for are dead. I have no grandchildren so I dress my Maltese in Xmas sweaters. The same ones every year. No I don’t expect people to buy them gifts:)). I have stopped exchange gifts with many of my friends except for a few. I usually get my kids something consumable that they enjoy and I get a gift card to a nice restaurant I like from them.
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Spending a few days with DIL. Niece and Nephew have already opened most of their gifts. They have received more shoes for Christmas than I own total.
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Spending a few days with DIL. Niece and Nephew have already opened most of their gifts. They have received more shoes for Christmas than I own total.
Wait, what? What will they do on Christmas Day?
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My wife voluntarily buys gifts for about 15 family members. It's her choice and she enjoys it.
About 10 years ago we were forced to buy into a family gift exchange of an additional 10 people. Instead of picking names, everyone had to buy gifts for everyone. I think the limit was $35, but most people spent $50. We received gifts as well, but it was all crap. I tried my best to opt out but was unable to do so. I was told that because my wife and I were both working, we could afford it.
Now 10 years later, the organizers of this event suggested that we draw names instead. The reason that was given was because it's too expensive.
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Spending a few days with DIL. Niece and Nephew have already opened most of their gifts. They have received more shoes for Christmas than I own total.
Wait, what? What will they do on Christmas Day?
Open the ones from Grandma and Grandpa and aunts and uncles! We get each family a present, but I think the sisters get each kid a present....
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After the year that my sisters and I all gave each other gift cards (living in different states, so no idea what anyone wanted or needed), we called a moratorium. We only gave gifts to our parents and to our nephew who was still a kid.
I have a serious problem with gift cards. Giving a gift card is like giving someone shitty money.
"Here's some money!"
"Nice!"
"But you can only spend it at a store of my choosing."
"Oh . . . thanks . . . I guess?"
Somehow marketers have convinced people that giving limited money is somehow better than giving real money, and it's fucking weird.
You can just do VISA gift cards. I don't like to limit people's choices either, so that's what I get them.
Visa gift card -
"Here's some money!"
"Nice!"
"But because it's a Visa gift card you get less money than if I gave you cash. And there might be an activation fee depending on where I bought it."
"Oh . . . thanks . . . I guess?"
ANY gift cards always seem to come out as the worse option than cash. They've been very successfully marketed as somehow better than giving real money though . . . which bothers me deep down in the cockles of my heart. Maybe even in the sub-cockle area.
Here are just a few of the reasons why I stopped buying gift cards:
1. A few years ago a nearby restaurant had this "buy $50 in gift cards, get $10 more free" promo. So I bit. Seems like a good deal, right? Then, when I went to use one of the gift cards a few months later, it had never been activated and the restaurant wouldn't take it. I didn't have the receipt, and it didn't seem worth the life energy to ruin my day and argue with a server who obviously didn't care at all.
2. My other half was given a gift card to a restaurant chain that closed all locations in our area during the pandemic . . . so we couldn't use it. oh well!
3. And just this past week I was in Target at the customer service line behind a guy who had two $25 gift cards that wouldn't work AND he had the receipt from their purchase. The person working customer service agreed that everything was in order other than the cards not working, but he had no idea how to handle it and just shrugged. Then a few minutes later a manager showed and basically said "yeah this happens a lot because there's an extra step the cashier has to do that many forget." But then she left to go do something else without fixing the gift cards. When I left awhile later, the poor guy was still standing there at the counter. I have no idea how much of his life energy was robbed. I went through a similar thing once with a $10 Walmart gift card someone gave me. So not worth it. Seriously.
There are more reasons, but I'm 100% with GuitarSteve on this, and on Stroopwaffles being awesome.
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I found stroopwaffles at Aldi. We love those things now. I'll bet the real deal is even better...
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After the year that my sisters and I all gave each other gift cards (living in different states, so no idea what anyone wanted or needed), we called a moratorium. We only gave gifts to our parents and to our nephew who was still a kid.
I have a serious problem with gift cards. Giving a gift card is like giving someone shitty money.
"Here's some money!"
"Nice!"
"But you can only spend it at a store of my choosing."
"Oh . . . thanks . . . I guess?"
Somehow marketers have convinced people that giving limited money is somehow better than giving real money, and it's fucking weird.
You can just do VISA gift cards. I don't like to limit people's choices either, so that's what I get them.
Visa gift card -
"Here's some money!"
"Nice!"
"But because it's a Visa gift card you get less money than if I gave you cash. And there might be an activation fee depending on where I bought it."
"Oh . . . thanks . . . I guess?"
ANY gift cards always seem to come out as the worse option than cash. They've been very successfully marketed as somehow better than giving real money though . . . which bothers me deep down in the cockles of my heart. Maybe even in the sub-cockle area.
Here are just a few of the reasons why I stopped buying gift cards:
1. A few years ago a nearby restaurant had this "buy $50 in gift cards, get $10 more free" promo. So I bit. Seems like a good deal, right? Then, when I went to use one of the gift cards a few months later, it had never been activated and the restaurant wouldn't take it. I didn't have the receipt, and it didn't seem worth the life energy to ruin my day and argue with a server who obviously didn't care at all.
2. My other half was given a gift card to a restaurant chain that closed all locations in our area during the pandemic . . . so we couldn't use it. oh well!
3. And just this past week I was in Target at the customer service line behind a guy who had two $25 gift cards that wouldn't work AND he had the receipt from their purchase. The person working customer service agreed that everything was in order other than the cards not working, but he had no idea how to handle it and just shrugged. Then a few minutes later a manager showed and basically said "yeah this happens a lot because there's an extra step the cashier has to do that many forget." But then she left to go do something else without fixing the gift cards. When I left awhile later, the poor guy was still standing there at the counter. I have no idea how much of his life energy was robbed. I went through a similar thing once with a $10 Walmart gift card someone gave me. So not worth it. Seriously.
There are more reasons, but I'm 100% with GuitarSteve on this, and on Stroopwaffles being awesome.
This discussion has motivated/reminded me to get the ridiculous stack of gift cards that has been in an envelope stuck to our fridge since the beginning of the pandemic. Literally hundreds of dollars sitting there, not being used. My goal for early 2022 will be to use them up.
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This discussion has motivated/reminded me to get the ridiculous stack of gift cards that has been in an envelope stuck to our fridge since the beginning of the pandemic. Literally hundreds of dollars sitting there, not being used. My goal for early 2022 will be to use them up.
I had to throw most of mine out since the businesses folded over Covid. Most of the remaining ones are for small independent restaurants, and I refuse to use them while restaurants are still struggling. So some of those will probably need to be thrown out too if those restaurants go under.
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This discussion has motivated/reminded me to get the ridiculous stack of gift cards that has been in an envelope stuck to our fridge since the beginning of the pandemic. Literally hundreds of dollars sitting there, not being used. My goal for early 2022 will be to use them up.
I had to throw most of mine out since the businesses folded over Covid. Most of the remaining ones are for small independent restaurants, and I refuse to use them while restaurants are still struggling. So some of those will probably need to be thrown out too if those restaurants go under.
All of mine are for businesses that are still open, luckily, and most are doing well. But yeah, we have some for one small mom and pop restaurant that we love that we bought to help them out, and we won’t use them until things recover a bit more.
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This discussion has motivated/reminded me to get the ridiculous stack of gift cards that has been in an envelope stuck to our fridge since the beginning of the pandemic. Literally hundreds of dollars sitting there, not being used. My goal for early 2022 will be to use them up.
I had to throw most of mine out since the businesses folded over Covid. Most of the remaining ones are for small independent restaurants, and I refuse to use them while restaurants are still struggling. So some of those will probably need to be thrown out too if those restaurants go under.
All of mine are for businesses that are still open, luckily, and most are doing well. But yeah, we have some for one small mom and pop restaurant that we love that we bought to help them out, and we won’t use them until things recover a bit more.
I was looking in my wallet yesterday for some random reason and discovered I had a handful of gift cards from a few years ago still in there. Three for restaurants that don't exist here in Korea and one for Amazon that I just now loaded onto my account. Oops.
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A story of weird holiday consumption, pre-COVID:
My sister-in-law has always LOVED Black Friday. To the point of actually going to stores and standing in line to get in at midnight. She finds it to be "part of the holiday spirit." To each her own, but...
...a few years back, some of the stores in our area started opening at 6pm on Thursday (aka Thanksgiving day) to get a jump on Black Friday. We were right in the middle of eating our big family Thanksgiving meal when SIL suddenly jumped up and announced she had to leave in order to get to [insert name of store] so she could get the advertised deals on new/upgraded iPhones for herself and my two teenaged nieces. (they get new iPhones every year "because it's such a good deal")
I was astonished that someone would leave mid-meal just to go shopping.
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A story of weird holiday consumption, pre-COVID:
My sister-in-law has always LOVED Black Friday. To the point of actually going to stores and standing in line to get in at midnight. She finds it to be "part of the holiday spirit." To each her own, but...
...a few years back, some of the stores in our area started opening at 6pm on Thursday (aka Thanksgiving day) to get a jump on Black Friday. We were right in the middle of eating our big family Thanksgiving meal when SIL suddenly jumped up and announced she had to leave in order to get to [insert name of store] so she could get the advertised deals on new/upgraded iPhones for herself and my two teenaged nieces. (they get new iPhones every year "because it's such a good deal")
I was astonished that someone would leave mid-meal just to go shopping.
That is... horrifying
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A story of weird holiday consumption, pre-COVID:
My sister-in-law has always LOVED Black Friday. To the point of actually going to stores and standing in line to get in at midnight. She finds it to be "part of the holiday spirit." To each her own, but...
...a few years back, some of the stores in our area started opening at 6pm on Thursday (aka Thanksgiving day) to get a jump on Black Friday. We were right in the middle of eating our big family Thanksgiving meal when SIL suddenly jumped up and announced she had to leave in order to get to [insert name of store] so she could get the advertised deals on new/upgraded iPhones for herself and my two teenaged nieces. (they get new iPhones every year "because it's such a good deal")
I was astonished that someone would leave mid-meal just to go shopping.
OMG. All of it, from the store opening at 6 pm on Thanksgiving day to the annual iphones to the leaving mid-meal. Whoa.
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The only insane consumption in my family this year was wine and cookies, and I certainly contributed my share. I need a multivitamin and a salad.
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Ugh. Black Friday. I have had to have this conversation a few times with my teenagers.
Teen: "What are we going to do for Black Friday?"
Me: "Nothing."
Teen: "What?! I want to celebrate Black Friday!"
Me: "Black Friday is not a holiday and there are no traditions or things to celebrate. It's a thing made up recently by retailers to get you to shop."
Teen: "But it's Black Friday. It's the day people go to the mall because the deals are the best."
Me: "I'm definitely not going to the mall. And, statistically, prices on most mall-type goods are lowest after Christmas / early January, not on Black Friday."
By coincidence I shopped on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving this year because my son needed longer pants, and they already had all of the Black Friday "doorbusters" sales signs up and going. And I'm still convinced they are going to be cheaper next week.
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A story of weird holiday consumption, pre-COVID:
My sister-in-law has always LOVED Black Friday. To the point of actually going to stores and standing in line to get in at midnight. She finds it to be "part of the holiday spirit." To each her own, but...
...a few years back, some of the stores in our area started opening at 6pm on Thursday (aka Thanksgiving day) to get a jump on Black Friday. We were right in the middle of eating our big family Thanksgiving meal when SIL suddenly jumped up and announced she had to leave in order to get to [insert name of store] so she could get the advertised deals on new/upgraded iPhones for herself and my two teenaged nieces. (they get new iPhones every year "because it's such a good deal")
I was astonished that someone would leave mid-meal just to go shopping.
I’m actually one of those weirdos that enjoy Black Friday. Sometimes I get super deals, sometimes just OK deals. I do find it fun and enjoy the challenge of deal hunting and shopping in the wee hours of the morning. One time DH and so started at 6pm and kept going until 9/10am (yes, all night long).
But I wouldn’t give up a family meal for it. It’s good, but not that good. Family time is way more important. I agree that starting Black Friday at 6pm on Thanksgiving really does stink - I am not a fan.
I did get my new iPhone essentially for free this year on Cyber Monday. I do have to pay $400 extra over 2 years for an upgrade to a fancier plan. Much cheaper than paying cash for the phone.
2 years ago, I did something similar for DH and the kids for their iPhones, and ended up spending around US$200 for each phone (US gets better deals than here in Canada).
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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^Sounds like maybe you got good deals? It's hard to do an apples to apples comparison, though, if you had to get a more expensive phone plan. The main thing is that you seem to enjoy the process of finding the deals, and that's really important.
I bought my most recent new iphone on a normal day online, paid cash for it, and it was $500. Always paying cash up front for the phone has allowed me to sign up for the cheapest possible phone plan of my choice while also keeping a decent phone. For several years my phone plan was only $10 a month (although it didn't have much data, so I had to be on wifi, which I normally was, so it wasn't a problem).
My current phone plan is $30 a month and is unlimited everything as far and I can tell . . . at least I've never had to pay extra and I do things like drive cross country using a map app the whole way pretty regularly. ymmv
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We're at my Costco brother's for Christmas. Unsurprisingly, he shops at...Costco. They also keep snacks out on the counter, which I do not do. Last night, a pillow sized bag of Chex Mix was out on the counter (I may have put it there) and I picked out a huge amount of the Chex cereal pieces while we were watching the game. Like maybe half a box worth. OMG, talk about insane holiday consumption
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The only insane consumption in my family this year was wine and cookies, and I certainly contributed my share. I need a multivitamin and a salad.
Same here, nothing better than the day after all the festivities end. Do all the cleaning, go on a run, eat a healthy meal, feel like a brand new human.
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In my house, we are still working on leftovers. I haven’t felt hungry since Dec 24…
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My family is celebrating our Christmas on in a few weeks. This started when we lived overseas and my spouse couldn't always get leave time for the actual holiday. That, paired with a sister who often had to work on Christmas, meant we found it best to just pick a day that worked for everyone. I've found it feels no less festive.
It also allows us to avoid peak travel times and to do some of our shopping at the after Christmas sales. So I'm going to spend the next few days finishing off my list with items on deep discount.
I highly recommend this approach to anyone whose family might be open to it. The first year, I was certain it would feel like we were desperately trying to pretend it was Christmas when it wasn't. But as it turns out, the holiday is about family and love and our traditions, and all of that can happen in any square on the calendar.
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My family is celebrating our Christmas on in a few weeks. This started when we lived overseas and my spouse couldn't always get leave time for the actual holiday. That, paired with a sister who often had to work on Christmas, meant we found it best to just pick a day that worked for everyone. I've found it feels no less festive.
It also allows us to avoid peak travel times and to do some of our shopping at the after Christmas sales. So I'm going to spend the next few days finishing off my list with items on deep discount.
I highly recommend this approach to anyone whose family might be open to it. The first year, I was certain it would feel like we were desperately trying to pretend it was Christmas when it wasn't. But as it turns out, the holiday is about family and love and our traditions, and all of that can happen in any square on the calendar.
I did this many times when I had to work Christmas at the hospital. New year's eve/ day works especially well.
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The only insane consumption in my family this year was wine and cookies, and I certainly contributed my share. I need a multivitamin and a salad.
I consumed a rather insane amount of cheese. That might occur again this weekend, as one of my gifts was several wedges of different fancy cheeses.
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The only insane consumption in my family this year was wine and cookies, and I certainly contributed my share. I need a multivitamin and a salad.
I consumed a rather insane amount of cheese. That might occur again this weekend, as one of my gifts was several wedges of different fancy cheeses.
Ooh. I just bought some fancy-ish cheese at Costco because I hadn't had any for a while. Much was consumed last night.
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DIL wrapped a box full of presents from the dollar store to do a white elephant exchange as a game. She didn't show up on Christmas Day, by there were still about a dozen people there. So for the kids of the hosting family this was:
-open immediate family presents Christmas morning.
-open presents from Grandma and Grandpa and watch the visitors open their presents in the afternoon.
-THREE rounds of white elephant in the evening.
I tried to convince everyone that they should play another day when they were all home from school or when they next get together with the missing aunt and cousins, but no, Dad and FIL insisted that we must open all of these dollar store gifts on Christmas Day. I ate one of my candy bars, but the six year old smashed the one I was saving for later and the 12 year old took my cotton balls.
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A friend once shared her small family's anti-insane holiday tradition:. They made donations to charities in the name of the recipient. Wacky and unusual charities were the most prized.
For example, make a donation in your Aunt's name to the National Sock Darning Society, or the Be A Dear And Donate A Brassiere organization.
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A friend once shared her small family's anti-insane holiday tradition:. They made donations to charities in the name of the recipient. Wacky and unusual charities were the most prized.
For example, make a donation in your Aunt's name to the National Sock Darning Society, or the Be A Dear And Donate A Brassiere organization.
Oh man, I just added this to my holiday ideas list. Thank you!
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Just ran into a neighbor in the lobby of my apartment building... he was wheeling one of those hotel-style luggage carts that they use when you have too much luggage to physically carry and you have to pile it all onto the cart and wheel the cart around. He was very nice and said "Oh, this is going to take me a while, you go ahead. I'm so glad this is the last trip!" so I could get the elevator before him. On the way past I realized that he didn't actually have any luggage and it was all just shopping bags (I recognized a couple from Target but otherwise I'm clueless because I don't really shop). An entire luggage cart of shopping bags?? And this is the last trip of, presumably, many?? I couldn't help myself and asked as I walked by - "So was this from a really big shopping trip, or...??"
He said no, they were just coming back from Christmas at the grandparents' house... I guess it must have all been Christmas gifts they were bringing home. :-| I hope he didn't think my reaction ("Oh!") was rude... I was just kind of shocked... haha. My family doesn't celebrate Christmas at all so it's all a bit much.
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Just ran into a neighbor in the lobby of my apartment building... he was wheeling one of those hotel-style luggage carts that they use when you have too much luggage to physically carry and you have to pile it all onto the cart and wheel the cart around. He was very nice and said "Oh, this is going to take me a while, you go ahead. I'm so glad this is the last trip!" so I could get the elevator before him. On the way past I realized that he didn't actually have any luggage and it was all just shopping bags (I recognized a couple from Target but otherwise I'm clueless because I don't really shop). An entire luggage cart of shopping bags?? And this is the last trip of, presumably, many?? I couldn't help myself and asked as I walked by - "So was this from a really big shopping trip, or...??"
He said no, they were just coming back from Christmas at the grandparents' house... I guess it must have all been Christmas gifts they were bringing home. :-| I hope he didn't think my reaction ("Oh!") was rude... I was just kind of shocked... haha. My family doesn't celebrate Christmas at all so it's all a bit much.
Your neighbor owns a hotel-style luggage cart? Or does your apartment building have one?
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Your neighbor owns a hotel-style luggage cart? Or does your apartment building have one?
The building has some of them (it's a pretty big building with hundreds of residents).
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A friend once shared her small family's anti-insane holiday tradition:. They made donations to charities in the name of the recipient. Wacky and unusual charities were the most prized.
For example, make a donation in your Aunt's name to the National Sock Darning Society, or the Be A Dear And Donate A Brassiere organization.
I love this so much.
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A friend once shared her small family's anti-insane holiday tradition:. They made donations to charities in the name of the recipient. Wacky and unusual charities were the most prized.
For example, make a donation in your Aunt's name to the National Sock Darning Society, or the Be A Dear And Donate A Brassiere organization.
I love this so much.
Me too I want to do this.
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A friend once shared her small family's anti-insane holiday tradition:. They made donations to charities in the name of the recipient. Wacky and unusual charities were the most prized.
For example, make a donation in your Aunt's name to the National Sock Darning Society, or the Be A Dear And Donate A Brassiere organization.
I agree. This is incredibly awesome.
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My family gave up on "real" gift exchanging between adults years ago, and now the grandkids are 19+ so they're adults, too.
We do a "yankee exchange" (and argue about the rules!).
$25 limit, but some spend a lot less, like whoever bought the backscratcher I ended up with.
It's fun because our rules are that after you open your gift you have one opportunity to steal a gift that was already opened by someone else, which is how I lost the salad tongs but ended up with a backscratcher.
My contribution this year was Hawaiian style seat belt shoulder pads from the Maui swap meet, which was actually a sought after item in our exchange.
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My family gave up on "real" gift exchanging between adults years ago, and now the grandkids are 19+ so they're adults, too.We do a "yankee exchange" (and argue about the rules!).
$25 limit, but some spend a lot less, like whoever bought the backscratcher I ended up with.
Arguing about the rules is one of the best parts of those things. At my holiday gatherings, the procedure of closely inspecting the gift, taking it, but not opening it became known at the "[Nitrate] Gambit." The legality of this move was hotly debated so it was decided that person hosting the party got to set the rules. Since the person hosting changed from year to year, certain years the Nitrate Gambit was allowed, and sometimes it was not.
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My family is celebrating our Christmas on in a few weeks. This started when we lived overseas and my spouse couldn't always get leave time for the actual holiday. That, paired with a sister who often had to work on Christmas, meant we found it best to just pick a day that worked for everyone. I've found it feels no less festive.
It also allows us to avoid peak travel times and to do some of our shopping at the after Christmas sales. So I'm going to spend the next few days finishing off my list with items on deep discount.
I highly recommend this approach to anyone whose family might be open to it. The first year, I was certain it would feel like we were desperately trying to pretend it was Christmas when it wasn't. But as it turns out, the holiday is about family and love and our traditions, and all of that can happen in any square on the calendar.
I did this many times when I had to work Christmas at the hospital. New year's eve/ day works especially well.
My dad was a minister so very busy with Advent and extra Christmas services. As a kid, we had a special spread of appetizers/goodies between services on Christmas Eve, opened a single gift the morning of Christmas Day, and had the big extended family celebration on Jan 6, which is Epiphany. I think it was about time, after Christmas sales and the fact that he would receive many cash gifts on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. They didn't have much money at all, so it allowed them go stretch it further.
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My family is celebrating our Christmas on in a few weeks. This started when we lived overseas and my spouse couldn't always get leave time for the actual holiday. That, paired with a sister who often had to work on Christmas, meant we found it best to just pick a day that worked for everyone. I've found it feels no less festive.
It also allows us to avoid peak travel times and to do some of our shopping at the after Christmas sales. So I'm going to spend the next few days finishing off my list with items on deep discount.
I highly recommend this approach to anyone whose family might be open to it. The first year, I was certain it would feel like we were desperately trying to pretend it was Christmas when it wasn't. But as it turns out, the holiday is about family and love and our traditions, and all of that can happen in any square on the calendar.
I did this many times when I had to work Christmas at the hospital. New year's eve/ day works especially well.
My dad was a minister so very busy with Advent and extra Christmas services. As a kid, we had a special spread of appetizers/goodies between services on Christmas Eve, opened a single gift the morning of Christmas Day, and had the big extended family celebration on Jan 6, which is Epiphany. I think it was about time, after Christmas sales and the fact that he would receive many cash gifts on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. They didn't have much money at all, so it allowed them go stretch it further.
That’s absolutely brilliant. I am in awe.
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This thread has been amazing!!
Now that the holiday are drawing to a close, any wild examples of absurd consumptionism witnessed?
I think the only thing for me is that I have several very wealthy family members, and their lifestyles always flabbergast me when I am home. The classic example in my family is that my uncle buys a new fishing boat (fiberglass bass boat) and buys a BRAND NEW Ford F350 that matches the color of the boat every 2 years. His kids each have a new Jeep Grand Cherokee (they are 22 and 24). Truly wild stuff.
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We bought one member of the family a 1960s GTO and another a vintage 1950s Chevy. Does that count as extravagant?
(Both are about 6-7 inches long and need much painting and assembly).
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My preschool-age nieces got a truly appalling amount of stuff. Just insane. And sooooo much of it is plastic toy garbage! This is what happens when there aren't a ton of kids in the extended family and a lot of the adults grew up fairly poor and are now fairly successful. It's like they're making up for never having the mountain of toys to open on Christmas morning themselves. Humans are weird. I'm not judging (much) because I understand it makes them feel good to see the kids having fun, and at least the kids are grateful and excited about the toys and not complaining that they didn't get the right colour of something. But holy crap that's a lot of ... well, crap.
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We bought one member of the family a 1960s GTO and another a vintage 1950s Chevy. Does that count as extravagant?
(Both are about 6-7 inches long and need much painting and assembly).
Hee hee, before I saw your parenthetical comment, I was going to guess, "Matchbox cars?". Not too far off.
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I have discovered stroopwafels this year and have plans to consume them at insane levels at each given chance. :P
My wife and I were flying over the holidays, and the airline gave out stroopwafels as an in-flight snack. Being the nutritionally-responsible one, she nearly declined before I intervened on her behalf and offered to take said stroopwafel off her hands.
Marital harmony be damned, I'm not passing up on the opportunity to consume stroopwafels. ;)
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I just bought a few packets of clearance spekulatius (87 cents) and pfefferneusse (54 cents) at my local aldi.
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I have discovered stroopwafels this year and have plans to consume them at insane levels at each given chance. :P
My wife and I were flying over the holidays, and the airline gave out stroopwafels as an in-flight snack. Being the nutritionally-responsible one, she nearly declined before I intervened on her behalf and offered to take said stroopwafel off her hands.
Marital harmony be damned, I'm not passing up on the opportunity to consume stroopwafels. ;)
Glad you did that, as refusing a stroopwafel must be classified as some sort of crime against humanity. I think my family has worked through three kilograms of stroopwafels this holiday.