1) blueberry pancake flavored pork sausage - $3.99 a pound.
I had to read the article to actually understand what this meant... and I still don't get the point of mixing fruit and meat flavors.
2) Asparagus water. 4 stalks of asparagus in a jar of water makes "Asparagus Water". Sells for $5.99
LOL.
3) Pint of ice cream (kale, pear and banana flavored) - $9.99
Just my opinion, but ice cream should be sweet. Kale-flavored? (Then again, I've never found chocolate ice cream to be sweet, which is why I never eat it.) So I'm supposed to eat my veggies (which I do anyway) in ice cream format rather than enjoy sweet ice cream? Makes me wonder if, a generation from now, kids will all hate ice cream, since the only flavors are things like kale.
6) 16 oz jar of almond butter. $23.99
I have a philosophical objection to "fake food". If I want almonds, I can buy almonds. If I want butter, I can buy butter. If I want "vegan butter", I can buy margarine. Why do I need almond margarine, and why isn't it called almond margarine?
I get why people make fun of Whole Foods. I hope there's reasonably-priced food choices there.
...
Wait. BONELESS WATERMELON? I assume that's labelled incorrectly, because otherwise I fear for the future of retail.