Author Topic: Free shipping was not free after all  (Read 19161 times)

arebelspy

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Re: Free shipping was not free after all
« Reply #100 on: October 27, 2016, 07:51:23 AM »

Oh?  What names would that be?


We were called apostrophes.

I have no clue what you're talking about.

I don't think this is productive to discuss any more, but if you'd like to continue, feel free to PM me.
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Making Cookies

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Re: Free shipping was not free after all
« Reply #101 on: October 27, 2016, 09:54:31 AM »
In case I didn't suggest this before (seems like I did) - get a folding luggage cart. Its what i used before my luggage grew wheels. Cheap, carries all those things you can't.

I have no idea how you can get on and off a bus if you can't lift your shopping but maybe that's an occasion for a taxi or Uber/whatever the other one is.

frugalnacho

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Re: Free shipping was not free after all
« Reply #102 on: October 27, 2016, 03:06:45 PM »

I would question how any adult would not be able to lift an envelope containing a tax return and probe for more details, very similar to what I did.  I believe it's relevant, because again, it's literally unbelievable to me.

Perhaps you could expand your mind then?

When several other posters confirmed the OP's basic premise, instead of saying "Oh, ok, perhaps I should reflect upon this previously unbelievable situation to see if I can comprehend how it might be possible" you continued to push the issue well past the point of politeness.

And now that it's been explained to you (again) by multiple persons, in multiple ways, and you still continue to disparage the OP, I think it's become a clear violation of Rule #1.

Expand my mind? To what? Just because several people get offended and agree with the OP doesn't change the laws of physics, and just because several people agree doesn't make them right nor does it make the story make sense.  As a counterpoint there were several people who seem to agree with me and not believe the OP's story. 

I am not sure how disbelieving the OP's story translates to me disparaging her.  As I stated several times there must be some miscommunication where I don't understand the true size and weight of the box in question, and the OP never clarified what they were. 

First 24" monitor on amazon:

https://www.amazon.com/ViewSonic-VX2452MH-24-Inch-LED-Lit-Monitor/dp/B00EZSUVHK/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1477601643&sr=8-2-spons&keywords=24%22+monitor&psc=1

Item Weight    8.4 pounds
Item Dimensions L x W x H    8.8 x 22 x 17 inches

Given those dimensions and weight I still find the story absolutely unbelievable.  If anyone disagrees with me that is fine, we can just agree to disagree.  Perhaps the object was far larger/heavier than what I am envisioning which could be the source of disagreement.  If anyone was offended by any of my posts, or thought I was being an asshole, then I apologize and can assure you that was not my intent with any of my posts.  I have no ill will towards the OP or anyone in this thread, I just don't think the story is believable, and also can't believe anyone else would think the story is believable.  At this point I don't think any further explanation from either side is warranted.

I know I said I wasn't posting again because I don't think this thread is being productive, but for real this time I am done posting in this thread.

Rural

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Re: Free shipping was not free after all
« Reply #103 on: October 27, 2016, 06:42:47 PM »
For what it's worth I am both a very small female with a disability that prevents my lifting much of anything and someone who frequently has observed a phenomenon that is sometimes called "mansplaining," and I have not observed FrugalNacho saying anything in this thread that was offensive or that could be misconstrued that way.

Metric Mouse

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Re: Free shipping was not free after all
« Reply #104 on: October 27, 2016, 07:34:35 PM »

I am not sure how disbelieving the OP's story translates to me disparaging her.

When questioned, the OP reiterated that this occurred. Whether it did or not, to continue to argue about the story's veracity, after confirming, is disparaging.

There are times when agreeing to disagree is fine. To continue to attack a poster's honesty because one cannot comprehend their anecdote is not fine.

frugalnacho

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Re: Free shipping was not free after all
« Reply #105 on: October 28, 2016, 10:43:47 AM »
FWIW, Nacho, MM here wasn't one of the ones who reported it, nor the person who PM'd me after the mod note thanking me.

I share this because you've always seemed like a good person, and I think you really just don't get that your comments have been on the rude side.  It's not a matter of "majority decides they don't like you," it's a matter of "the continual comments have crossed the line to genuinely rude."

As someone put it to me in a PM "mansplainers gonna 'splain"... I don't think you were trying to go for that, but this is how it came off.

The more I reflect on this I can't help but point out the irony of someone using the term mansplain in a complaint about my behavior.  The word is inherently sexist, misandrist, and offensive.

arebelspy

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Re: Free shipping was not free after all
« Reply #106 on: October 28, 2016, 10:56:27 AM »
You may be right.  I've never given much thought to the word, as I've actually only seen it used once or twice, and always in a humorous context.

I guess you didn't understand their sentiment then, even if the wording chosen was poor.

I'm not sure though what wasn't clear about this:
I don't think this is productive to discuss any more, but if you'd like to continue, feel free to PM me.

You could have easily PM'd me that, rather than posting it.
We are two former teachers who accumulated a bunch of real estate, retired at 29, and now travel the world full time with two kids.
If you want to know more about me, or how we did that, or see lots of pictures, this Business Insider profile tells our story pretty well.
We (rarely) blog at AdventuringAlong.com. Check out our Now page to see what we're up to currently.

Bourbon

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Re: Free shipping was not free after all
« Reply #107 on: October 28, 2016, 11:02:06 AM »
For what it's worth I am both a very small female with a disability that prevents my lifting much of anything and someone who frequently has observed a phenomenon that is sometimes called "mansplaining," and I have not observed FrugalNacho saying anything in this thread that was offensive or that could be misconstrued that way.

I'm neither but I'm also mystified about the same thing.

arebelspy

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Re: Free shipping was not free after all
« Reply #108 on: October 28, 2016, 11:10:43 AM »
I don't know if the comment was made about FrugalNacho's post(s), Guses', or someone else's.  It did not specify who they were talking about.  Regardless of that, the point is that if someone tells you they physically aren't capable of something, to insist they're wrong, have other people confirm it's plausible, and then continue to insist, is rude.  There's no need to belittle someone by insisting "anyone" should be able to lift that, or that you can't comprehend anyone not being able to.  How do you think that makes the people who can't do it feel?
We are two former teachers who accumulated a bunch of real estate, retired at 29, and now travel the world full time with two kids.
If you want to know more about me, or how we did that, or see lots of pictures, this Business Insider profile tells our story pretty well.
We (rarely) blog at AdventuringAlong.com. Check out our Now page to see what we're up to currently.

frugalnacho

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Re: Free shipping was not free after all
« Reply #109 on: October 28, 2016, 11:49:48 AM »
You may be right.  I've never given much thought to the word, as I've actually only seen it used once or twice, and always in a humorous context.

I guess you didn't understand their sentiment then, even if the wording chosen was poor.

I'm not sure though what wasn't clear about this:
I don't think this is productive to discuss any more, but if you'd like to continue, feel free to PM me.

You could have easily PM'd me that, rather than posting it.

I thought it was a relevant thought that could potentially benefit other readers.  I didn't think it warranted a new thread, and I don't really want to devolve into a debate about the use of the term, but I figured I could just leave it here.  I could have PMed you and you could have relayed it to the original person, but my intent was not really to relay a message to that person, just point out something I perceived as a bit hypocritical and leave it as food for thought for everyone.  I'm not easily offended (and I'm not personally offended by the term), so it didn't occur to me immediately. It wasn't until I thought about it for a bit that it actually occurred to me.  No one else has commented on it though, so maybe it never occurred to anyone else either? 

I also can't be the only one that notices the parallel of me and a few other posters saying we have no ill will, are not intending to be disparaging, etc. and yet getting repeatedly told we are wrong.  I guess if the OP makes an incredulous and implausible claim it should not be questioned, but when I (and several other posters in this thread) make a claim we are just intentionally being obtuse assholes and should ridiculed and branded with scarlet letters. 

Yes this could have been relayed in a PM too, but maybe someone will be able to glean a little insight on my POV.  It would be deliciously ironic however if several posters could pile on top and continue to reiterate how wrong I am and how I should just get it.




Bourbon

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Re: Free shipping was not free after all
« Reply #110 on: October 28, 2016, 12:07:12 PM »
I don't know if the comment was made about FrugalNacho's post(s), Guses', or someone else's.  It did not specify who they were talking about.  Regardless of that, the point is that if someone tells you they physically aren't capable of something, to insist they're wrong, have other people confirm it's plausible, and then continue to insist, is rude.  There's no need to belittle someone by insisting "anyone" should be able to lift that, or that you can't comprehend anyone not being able to.  How do you think that makes the people who can't do it feel?

I'm not one to usually comment on these things and will probably bow out after this, as the whole thing seems a bit much.  I don't think anyone was belittling, just talking through what was an unlikely scenario from their experience.  Seemed like they were getting shouted down/admonished because others were speaking out, and I just wanted to offer a balancing opinion. 

If they are rude/jerks because of multiple reports, I'd just like to register as someone who didn't see them as being offensive. 

arebelspy

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Re: Free shipping was not free after all
« Reply #111 on: October 28, 2016, 06:05:17 PM »


I also can't be the only one that notices the parallel of me and a few other posters saying we have no ill will, are not intending to be disparaging, etc. and yet getting repeatedly told we are wrong.  I guess if the OP makes an incredulous and implausible claim it should not be questioned, but when I (and several other posters in this thread) make a claim we are just intentionally being obtuse assholes and should ridiculed and branded with scarlet letters. 

It's amazing to me you could try to draw this parallel.

Telling someone who physically was incapable that they should have been capable, versus letting someone know they have offended other people.

No one told you you were wrong, I'm just explaining how you're coming off to others.  And clearly not everyone, as several have chimed in that you didn't come off that way. People view things differently, obviously.
We are two former teachers who accumulated a bunch of real estate, retired at 29, and now travel the world full time with two kids.
If you want to know more about me, or how we did that, or see lots of pictures, this Business Insider profile tells our story pretty well.
We (rarely) blog at AdventuringAlong.com. Check out our Now page to see what we're up to currently.

frugalnacho

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Re: Free shipping was not free after all
« Reply #112 on: October 28, 2016, 07:01:02 PM »


I also can't be the only one that notices the parallel of me and a few other posters saying we have no ill will, are not intending to be disparaging, etc. and yet getting repeatedly told we are wrong.  I guess if the OP makes an incredulous and implausible claim it should not be questioned, but when I (and several other posters in this thread) make a claim we are just intentionally being obtuse assholes and should ridiculed and branded with scarlet letters. 

It's amazing to me you could try to draw this parallel.

Telling someone who physically was incapable that they should have been capable, versus letting someone know they have offended other people.

No one told you you were wrong, I'm just explaining how you're coming off to others.  And clearly not everyone, as several have chimed in that you didn't come off that way. People view things differently, obviously.

Eh, I believe they did tell me I was wrong.  Maybe not those words verbatim, but that was certainly the jist of it. I do get what you are saying, I just don't understand why physical ability gets some free pass, like it's some protected religious belief, and nobody can question the plausibility of the claim no matter how trivial the task is.  I still don't think this thread or this discussion are being productive for anyone.

Silverado

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Re: Free shipping was not free after all
« Reply #113 on: October 28, 2016, 07:46:51 PM »
Some very fun back and forth here. Maybe we are learning from it, but maybe not.

More worthless info to not help:

When we were living in Germany, we (of course) bought a bunch of ikea furniture. We did not have a car and had to ride the bus to the store. We bought pillows and lamps and assorted small things, and had no problem. One time we were getting some larger shelves, and I stood there looking at the boxes back in the warehouse area and finally said, 'oh hell no, I cannot get that out the door, across the parking lot, and onto and off the bus' so, I went back and canceled the order.

"A mans got to know his limitations"

I'm aligned with 'this story is bunk without better details', and in my opinion, some common sense.

Metric Mouse

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Re: Free shipping was not free after all
« Reply #114 on: October 28, 2016, 10:48:42 PM »

The more I reflect on this I can't help but point out the irony of someone using the term mansplain in a complaint about my behavior.  The word is inherently sexist, misandrist, and offensive.

This.  The term is used to dismiss a view based solely upon the sex of the person who made the claim. Doesn't have much use in reasonable discussion.
« Last Edit: October 31, 2016, 08:32:21 PM by Metric Mouse »

joleran

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Re: Free shipping was not free after all
« Reply #115 on: October 31, 2016, 02:10:45 PM »
This.  The term is used to dismiss a view based sole upon the sex of the person who made the claim. Doesn't have much use in reasonable discussion.

Agreed, if "mansplaining" is OK, so must "being on the rag" and a cohort of other ills.