This is a story about my Fourth of July adventure.
So I headed over to one of my antimustachian buddies place for a party. He always has fun parties but this one was the most expensive to date. His wife’s dad has a farm with a small river running through it. So I head to the farm and parked my hatchback…I’m the only one that can’t drive to the river and get heckled every time. He came and picked me up and headed to the river; parking on the sandy shore (Deep Sand). Having a good time then we decided to pack up and go to his house and hang by the pool.
They used a small trailer to haul everything. He pulls his jeep around and we hook up the trailer. Someone jokes about he’ll probably burry his jeep. He thinks his jeep is unstoppable since he just put a new lift kit and big tires on it. Which I think is funny because the thing is a beat up 95 with a 4 banger. So he stomps on the gas and buries it to the frame. Now he’s pissed; starts slamming his door against the side for his rig, denting it up and breaking the mirror. Pulls out a shovel to start digging out, we pitched in and before we even spend 2 mins digging he jumps in again to rump on it. I start seeing oil spew from the front differential and smoke coming from his clutch. This technique repeats about 4 times before he would listen to reason, he wouldn’t even unhook the trailer…lol. His temp gauge is pegged out and radiator is steaming.
They go get his wife’s 2013 F250 hook up straps to the jeep. His plan was to have her pull it out while it was in neutral and the trailer still attached. She rumps on the gas and quickly buries the Ford to the frame. They go get another guys newer lifted jeep, hooked it up to the F250 but it doesn’t budge. I’m pissed because they wouldn’t listen to anyone; so I scurry off to the woods to find some things we can put under the tires. I find a 4-5 inch round tree that was a good size to leverage under the jeep to use as a lift. I haul it down, by this time they are about to use the newer Jeep to pulls his jeep out. This time I stop him and now he’s finally listening. I get them to help me lift the jeep with the tree. Worked like a charm; filled in the holes and now it’s sitting on tires and not the suspension. Plus, we unhook the trailer!
We start the pull with both jeeps running and pops out. Then we tried a two Jeep pull on the F250. Then he goes back into beast mode. First they try an even pull then it escalates into to a jerking pull. Both Jeep now have bent rear bumpers. The newer Jeep breaks his bumper and the chain snaps off and hits the F250 breaking the grill. By this time the F250 has all kinds of service lights on (ABS, Traction control, Service engine, high temp). The older Jeep is overheating but he keeps it running because he said if he turns it off it won’t start again. I’m the only one to look under the hood; oh look you shredded the serpentine belt. He finally turns it off when the radiator boils over. Finally, someone says lets grab the coolers and head back to the house. We’ll come back down tomorrow with fresh heads. It works; we continue having a good time back at the house. We went back down this morning to pull out the trucks, this time with one of her dad’s tractors…out in a few mins.
So we get the truck and Jeep back to the house and the first thing on their mind…get this…let’s head to the lake and ride Jet Ski’s. You can’t make this stuff up! They didn’t even want to look over the vehicles. I don’t know how they survive! He’s asked me for some money tips on many occasions (But normally I just stick to the basics because I know it won’t help). Which is funny because she works for an investment firm, well did. She just quit because she wants to become a realtor. The investment firm tried to get her to stay by giving her a $50K pay raise (Total of $90K) and every other Friday off but she turned it down.
They don’t make a lot of money for their lifestyle…maybe $65K between the two. They are in the middle of building a house with a pool house; he told me yesterday that the bill so far is about $250K. Owns 4 Horses, 2 horse trailers, 2013 F250 to pull the trailers, 2013 Ford Mustang, a very busted 1995 Jeep, 2 Jet Ski’s, 3 dogs (Make that 4 they found another last night) and she spends about $25K a year barrel racing. I don’t see this ending well for them; especially since I get a call about every 4 months needing a place to stay because of them fighting. I will say they provide me endless hours of good entertainment.