Our good friends are a financial train wreck. We're getting ready to celebrate their $20k wedding that they can't afford to pay for. They've never wanted to learn what we tried to tell them about saving/budgets and they've always had something to say about our "cheapism" but sure enough, when it came time for them to start paying down deposits on their wedding stuff they came crawling around to us asking for financial support.
At least they weren't surprised when we politely shot them down.
Wait, your friends asked you for financial support for their wedding?? Wow, I'm not really ensure how to interpret that. Are they that desperate? or do they just have a big set of balls? or do they think their friends *should* support them? I'm just baffled by this.
Ditto, I don't even understand! More details please!!!
They probably asked for their wedding gifts up front and in cash. Because you KNOW wedding gifts are supposed to cover the cost of the wedding, right!? (I hope my sarcasm came through there.)
http://www.thespec.com/news-story/3845206-have-your-say-about-the-firestorm-over-a-wedding-gift/
Yikes, that story was appaling! ...and from Stoney Creek, ONT where my hubby's from!
Hi there. The wedding was 2 months ago and i thought you'd all like an follow-up on how it went.
Our friends did end up getting married and the wedding was something like $20,000 total which believe it or not, was mostly funded by other friends and relatives who were too poor to assist, but i guess felt too guilty to not oblige them. The wedding was nice as weddings go and everyone had a great time, like you do at most weddings and everyone is still friends just as before (no harm, no foul) but was it worth the cost? No, probably not.
After the initial request was denied, there were other requests that came up from the bride/groom that were sort of less blatant, but still completely ridiculous. The groom tried to rope my husband into helping to fund and build a huge back patio out of stone so they could have the rehearsal dinner at their farm. When my husband decline the funding offer but offered to assist with the build part they tried to rope him into other tasks (painting the inside of the house, fixing the kitchen/bathroom, installing a new dining room floor, etc) that had nothing to do with the wedding but was on their to-do list. My husband respectfully kept them on task and helped with the patio and whatever tasks he felt he could/should do, but eventually declined to assist further with non-standard groomsmen wedding tasks.
The bride tried a few times to guilt money out of me to pay for upgrades to her wedding flowers, invitations, and pre-wedding preps (spray tan, nails, hair, make-up) which I declined. None of the bridesmaids had the money for what she wanted but we managed to pull together to make everything lovely and cover the standard costs (shower, bridesmaid's gift, makeup/hair, etc). The only other absurd request i received was to fund a bachelorette party in Vegas (a few hundred miles aways) for the bride and other bridesmaids because "I had all the money". Not sure how she came up with that idea but she even got her sister-in-law involved in trying to convince me, but to no avail.
I guess I'd say our friends have the biggest set of entitlement balls on them a couple could have, but honestly, they are otherwise lovely people. They do expect things from their family, their jobs, and I guess society on whole and sort of live a paycheck billionaire's lifestyle. (They have money when they get paid, but not the next day.) I don't think they hesitated for a second in asking us and i don't think they even batted an eyelash when we said no which makes me think they are both very accustomed to requesting assistance and being denied it.
It's been a few months since their wedding and i have heard some grumblings about not enough money or gifts but that has given way to their new desire... a new, bigger and better house. Not sure how they are going to pay for this either, but I know one couple who won't be helping them pay for it. ;)