The Money Mustache Community
Around the Internet => Antimustachian Wall of Shame and Comedy => Topic started by: FireLane on December 14, 2017, 07:32:36 PM
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How do you know when we've hit the peak of the subscription-box craze? Maybe when there's a website where you can subscribe to receive bags of dirt (http://www.goldrushpaydirt.com/store/p11/Dirt_of_the_Month_Club%21.html).
The appeal, such as it is, is that the dirt comes from real gold mines! and, if you sift it yourself, there's a chance of finding a minute quantity of gold. I mean, I guess if that's what you like to do in your spare time. But the basic problem still remains: you're paying for people to ship you bags of dirt.
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Or....
(https://www.abc.virginia.gov/library/product-images/schnapps/spice/goldschlager-schnapps.jpg?h=400&w=400&la=en&hash=A3C5B64A4EF26ECE010E895DFEB9465A88B26BF4)
Probably has the same amount of gold.
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How do you know when we've hit the peak of the subscription-box craze? Maybe when there's a website where you can subscribe to receive bags of dirt (http://www.goldrushpaydirt.com/store/p11/Dirt_of_the_Month_Club%21.html).
The appeal, such as it is, is that the dirt comes from real gold mines! and, if you sift it yourself, there's a chance of finding a minute quantity of gold. I mean, I guess if that's what you like to do in your spare time. But the basic problem still remains: you're paying for people to ship you bags of dirt.
Wow, that's crazy. I thought by the subject title this was going to be some kind of gossip magazine subscription or something, but this is way funnier.
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And the company didn't run a metal detector over the dirt to pick out any pirate's treasure before they bagged it and mailed it... We promise.
Oh what a Christmas this will be - a bag of golden dirt, a glass jar of English air, a $500 pre-sharpened pencil and a 6" square block of ice from a Norwegian glacier!
This ties in "First World Problems" somehow. Maybe twist it around to "First World Privilege".
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LOL
Sorry, keep that expensive dirt away from my $1,900 Ice Ball Mold
http://www.japantrendshop.com/ice-ball-mold-soccer-ball-football-55mm-ice-maker-p-1095.html
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LOL
Sorry, keep that expensive dirt away from my $1,900 Ice Ball Mold
http://www.japantrendshop.com/ice-ball-mold-soccer-ball-football-55mm-ice-maker-p-1095.html
While this is patently ridiculous and I would never spend money on it . . . the little ice soccer ball looks pretty cool.
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Your all just jealous that you did not figure out how to market a "dirt of the month" subscription and speed up you FIRE time.
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I'm definitely jealous that I didn't think of the dirt of the month club, but I do have a river...anyone interested in a monthly shipment of dirty water?
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Hey I'll better that - I'll send anyone that wants it tap water! I'll send it in pretty little plastic bottles that are break resistant with convenient twist off tops.
On the subject of that ice mold - a cheap 3D printer could make that mold. Just need to make the 3D model. Might be a neat DIY project.
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You guys are all amateurs!
Coming in 2018, if you have $10/month to spare, I'm going to sell you a bridge!*
*You will receive parts required in the construction of a "bridge," said bridge may not resemble advertised material and is not suitable for any uses other than ascetic pleasure
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Its probably cheaper to buy the dirt than say, get all the equipment, take a few days off work, travel out to gold country and find out that panning for gold can get kind of boring after a while.
besides, a truly modern gold bug has moved on to bitcoin!
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Hey I'll better that - I'll send anyone that wants it tap water! I pretty little plastic bottles that are break resistant with convenient twist off tops.
. . . and thus was born the multi-billion dollar industry of selling bottled water.
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And the company didn't run a metal detector over the dirt to pick out any pirate's treasure before they bagged it and mailed it... We promise.
Oh what a Christmas this will be - a bag of golden dirt, a glass jar of English air, a $500 pre-sharpened pencil and a 6" square block of ice from a Norwegian glacier!
This ties in "First World Problems" somehow. Maybe twist it around to "First World Privilege".
Don't forget to ask for a $1000 (sterling silver) tin can!
http://m.tiffany.com/accessories/desk/everyday-objects-sterling-silver-tin-can-60559139?fromGrid=1&gridpos=36/3030&fromcid=3779727&trackpdp=bg&trackgridpos=16&tracktile=new
And a $425 protractor!
http://m.tiffany.com/accessories/desk/everyday-objects-sterling-silver-protractor-60558523?fromGrid=1&gridpos=36/6300&fromcid=3779727&trackpdp=bg&trackgridpos=31&tracktile=new|highlight
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Hmm I live in gold country, the town I grew up in exists due to the gold mine. Anyone want any dirt?
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Hmm I live in gold country, the town I grew up in exists due to the gold mine. Anyone want any dirt?
Sure, I'll take whatever dirt you have on any upcoming horse races. Daddy needs a new pair of shoes.
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People buy mud all the time to put on their faces. It's special mud with ashes from volcanos to make your skin smooth. Something like that. I got it from a fancy schmancy skincare shop.
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I was thinking of selling "Bag 'O Glass" but I see Irwin Mainway has already beat me to it:
http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/irwin-mainway/n8641?snl=1
Consumer Reporter: Alright. Fine. Fine. Well, we'd like to show you another one of Mr. Mainway's products. It retails for $1.98, and it's called Bag O' Glass. [ holds up bag of glass ] Mr. Mainway, this is simply a bag of jagged, dangerous, glass bits.
Irwin Mainway: Yeah, right, it's you know, it's glass, it's broken glass, you know? It sells very well, as a matter of fact, you know? It's just broken glass, you know?
Consumer Reporter: [ laughs ] I don't understand. I mean, children could seriously cut themselves on any one of these pieces!
Irwin Mainway: Yeah, well, look - you know, the average kid, he picks up, you know, broken glass anywhere, you know? The beach, the street, garbage cans, parking lots, all over the place in any big city. We're just packaging what the kids want! I mean, it's a creative toy, you know? If you hold this up, you know, you see colors, every color of the rainbow! I mean, it teaches him about light refraction, you know? Prisms, and that stuff! You know what I mean?
Consumer Reporter: So, you don't feel that this product is dangerous?
Irwin Mainway: No! Look, we put a label on every bag that says, "Kid! Be careful - broken glass!" I mean, we sell a lot of products in the "Bag O'" line.. like Bag O' Glass, Bag O' Nails, Bag O' Bugs, Bag O' Vipers, Bag O' Sulfuric Acid. They're decent toys, you know what I mean?
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You guys are all amateurs!
Coming in 2018, if you have $10/month to spare, I'm going to sell you a bridge!*
*You will receive parts required in the construction of a "bridge," said bridge may not resemble advertised material and is not suitable for any uses other than ascetic pleasure
If you enjoy it doesn't that defeat the purpose?
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Hmmm now that I am thinking about this, I think my next venture should be at home assembly ice kits. Comes with everything you need to make ice cubes. $49.99.
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For $49/month you will receive a box of clothing invisible to foolish eyes. Only those with elite intelligence can visualize this ethereal ephemeral material.
* Failure to visualize will result in a recommendation to consult with one of our esteemed optical herbalists.
* Shipping is free. No returns, refunds, or exchanges.
* Purchaser is allowed to resell items.
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LOL
Sorry, keep that expensive dirt away from my $1,900 Ice Ball Mold
http://www.japantrendshop.com/ice-ball-mold-soccer-ball-football-55mm-ice-maker-p-1095.html
While this is patently ridiculous and I would never spend money on it . . . the little ice soccer ball looks pretty cool.
@GuitarStv
https://www.amazon.com/Round-Sphere-Soccer-Ball-Molds/dp/B072M638JN/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1513867143&sr=8-3&keywords=soccer+ball+ice+cube
https://www.amazon.com/Spherical-Silicone-Whiskey-Soccer-Food-grade/dp/B01IY0CJWE/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1513867143&sr=8-5&keywords=soccer+ball+ice+cube
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For $49/month you will receive a box of clothing invisible to foolish eyes. Only those with elite intelligence can visualize this ethereal ephemeral material.
* Failure to visualize will result in a recommendation to consult with one of our esteemed optical herbalists.
* Shipping is free. No returns, refunds, or exchanges.
* Purchaser is allowed to resell items.
Haha, nice one!
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For $49/month you will receive a box of clothing invisible to foolish eyes. Only those with elite intelligence can visualize this ethereal ephemeral material.
* Failure to visualize will result in a recommendation to consult with one of our esteemed optical herbalists.
* Shipping is free. No returns, refunds, or exchanges.
* Purchaser is allowed to resell items.
The "Dress Like an Emperor" club?
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For $49/month you will receive a box of clothing invisible to foolish eyes. Only those with elite intelligence can visualize this ethereal ephemeral material.
* Failure to visualize will result in a recommendation to consult with one of our esteemed optical herbalists.
* Shipping is free. No returns, refunds, or exchanges.
* Purchaser is allowed to resell items.
The "Dress Like an Emperor" club?
SmarThreadz (R)