Author Topic: Dear Abby needs some advice  (Read 4068 times)

Bea_Minus

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Dear Abby needs some advice
« on: October 14, 2015, 03:21:34 PM »
Did anyone see Dear Abby's advice column last Monday, Oct. 12?  She basically tells a 50-year old person who has the means to retire (no debt, house paid off, $60K/year from investments) to get counseling, because they apparently do not want to be a contributing member of society.  Here's the link:
http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/2015/10/12/1/friends-question-decision-to-retire-at#disqus-comments

I've already written to her with my thoughts... shall we flood her with OUR advice?  There are plenty of enlightened people who commented on it ...

Let's go!

Bea Minus -B-

FrugalShrew

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Re: Dear Abby needs some advice
« Reply #1 on: October 14, 2015, 03:46:47 PM »
This idea that you must be working to be "contributing member of society" is so pervasive -- and as I've learned from reading some really wonderful comments on this forum, quite sexist, too, because it discounts all the work of running a household and taking care of family members that women have traditionally done.

Although the very first comment called her out quite well:

Quote
This is probably one of the most judgmental things I've ever seen. A person who retires with 60k a year can no longer be a contributing member of society if they don't work a 9-5 job they hate? There's no possible opportunity for them to use their time for anything else? Volunteering, community involvement, creative endeavors, personal enrichment? None of these count, really? And not wanting a regular job means you need mental health examinations? Shame on you, Abby.


ShoulderThingThatGoesUp

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Re: Dear Abby needs some advice
« Reply #2 on: October 14, 2015, 04:52:55 PM »
Investing contributes to society.

iris lily

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Re: Dear Abby needs some advice
« Reply #3 on: October 14, 2015, 05:00:19 PM »
I was going to post this, glad that you did.

Yes, it was ridiculous. dH alerted me to it, it rang his bell as well.

Back decades ago when I read Dear Abby  and Ann Landers side by side, I would see Dear Abby  give deliberately bad answers now and then to stir up controversy and to allow her to offer a mea culpa to her readers which supposedly endeared her to them. I thought that was a cheap ploy then as now. Surely she can't be that stupid, gotta be a mistake.
« Last Edit: October 14, 2015, 05:03:58 PM by iris lily »

Abe

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Re: Dear Abby needs some advice
« Reply #4 on: October 14, 2015, 06:03:49 PM »
I'd say there are a fair number of people who are working and aren't really contributing much to society.

SwordGuy

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Re: Dear Abby needs some advice
« Reply #5 on: October 14, 2015, 07:24:16 PM »
Dear Abby and Ann Landers were sisters who died after not speaking to one another for decades.

Just in case one wanted to know how qualified these two individuals were for giving family and life advice...

One Noisy Cat

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Re: Dear Abby needs some advice
« Reply #6 on: October 15, 2015, 06:19:38 AM »
Dear Abby and Ann Landers were sisters who died after not speaking to one another for decades.

Just in case one wanted to know how qualified these two individuals were for giving family and life advice...


Twins actually who were basically raised as one. From their names Esther Pauline "Eppie" (Ann) and Pauline Esther "Popo" (Abby), dressed alike, went to same classes in school (junior high did separate them in some), when Abby got engaged Ann got herself a fiance so they could have a double marriage, Ann's hubby went to work in Abby's hubby family business although he ended up leaving because advancement to top was reserved for blood, when Ann took over the advice column Abby at first helped and later got her own.  Ultimately they did have a nasty breakup and would later give conflicting reports over how much they communicated.

bigalsmith101

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Re: Dear Abby needs some advice
« Reply #7 on: October 28, 2015, 10:26:46 PM »
Through a turn of events a few years back, having met the husband of "Dear Abby" through a completely unrelated forum, I ended up traveling through and spending the night in the guest bedroom of Dear Abby's house.

A few things I learned:

Dear Abby employs 3 full time receptionists to read the hundreds of letters she receives daily, who then decide which letters to respond to. The rest, and many other unread, are discarded. She is married to a man that made his own small fortune in a tradesman environment. (Enough such that any of us could retire from it).

They live in a 7200 square foot home. After dinner, I drank a glass of port from a bottle (when I researched the label days later) cost $1,500/bottle. The wine cellar in the home had 6 cases of it. ($100k+ in only a small fraction of the contents of the cellar).

The garage had a vast accumulation of vehicles that made no sense.

The man was retired at age 50+, Abby though did not personally meet her, is similarly aged and still "working".

Though I was treated very well during the 18 hours or so spent at the home, I found their lifestyle to be largely exuberant, and not in line with the middle class America that writes into Dear Abby's column. It's not hard to extrapolate that the advice given wouldn't fall in line with the Mustachian beliefs either.
I spent the first 6 years of "real" life in a self imposed semi retirement, to secure a lifetime of stories. Now it's time to secure the next lifetime through the badassity of FI.

"I achieved such a high level of badassity I just don't realize how normal people miss the whole process." --Le Barbu

Grigory

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Re: Dear Abby needs some advice
« Reply #8 on: October 28, 2015, 11:31:57 PM »
"Some people are ants by nature; they have to work, even when it is useless. Few people have a talent for constructive laziness."

Robert Heinlein, "Time Enough For Love"
Author of Buffett's Biggest Blunders and Go to college without going broke - now available on Kindle! :)

Telecaster

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Re: Dear Abby needs some advice
« Reply #9 on: October 28, 2015, 11:59:22 PM »
"Some people are ants by nature; they have to work, even when it is useless. Few people have a talent for constructive laziness."

Robert Heinlein, "Time Enough For Love"

^ Ha!  That's pretty great.

The current Abby is the daughter of the original Abby.  The original Abby was great in her own way.  The daughter flat out isn't very good.