Author Topic: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears  (Read 16240 times)

IndyPendent

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Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« on: August 02, 2016, 10:27:01 AM »
Confession time: what irrational fears do you have?

I actually started typing out a different "I'm so afraid of xyz happening" complainy-pants post, but as I struggled to articulate it I ended up poking fun at myself instead. It was surprisingly therapeutic! I was able to kick myself out of the anxiety I was feeling and reminded myself of just how many positions of strength I was operating in.

So, post your irrational fears here! You can mock yourself or undertake a little self-therapy, as I have.

*Edit* I was originally using the "irrational" label to mock my three somewhat rational fears, so I've added a completely irrational fear here. :)

Fear: I count steps, and I try to use my right foot on the last step every time. I have this weird fear that if I don't, something terrible will happen.

My original (somewhat) rational fears:

Fear: I'm wasting my life at a job I don't care about

Reality: While I relate to the original poster in this thread, where I genuinely don't care about the work I do and have very little passion, I'm doing this for a reason that matters to me. I have the historically rare opportunity to save and earn so much money that I never have to work for essentials again. What an awesome thing!


Fear: I have this nagging fear of losing my job and being unable to find another job that pays as much (thus severely impacting my time-to-FI).

Reality: This is doubly irrational as I contrast it with my first fear! I work in a growth industry, and my role directly produces revenue. By all metrics, I'm doing fine and may even be slightly better than average (I've confirmed this with my management and in my own metrics). I have no debt (not even a mortgage!) and thousands and thousands of dollars saved up. I could quit now and live for years without starving. I have a genuine desire to improve, and a willingness to listen. I am a highly employable person.


Fear: I'm afraid I'm not good enough--a fraud, waiting to be exposed.

This is the most annoying attribute of my high-achieving personality. Internally, I have these little voices that push me to gain acclaim. I keep a mental list of "achievements" to prove my worth. I'm aggressively goal-oriented and relentless in achieving external accolades. Literally any metric that is used for measurement of worth turns into an internal competition (including, ironically, FIRE).

Reality: I'm no more a fraud than anyone else. Everyone deals with weaknesses, and though I'm acutely aware of mine, nobody else cares about my weaknesses as much as I do. The world doesn't revolve around me, and I'm just another collection of dust in the wind. In 100 years I'll be dead, and my gravestone (if I'm lucky enough to have one) will last longer than I did. What am I really worried about?

Your turn!
« Last Edit: August 02, 2016, 07:30:41 PM by IndyPendent »

Chris22

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Re: Confess your irrational fears
« Reply #1 on: August 02, 2016, 11:05:36 AM »
Heights. 

Also, spiders in confined spaces like my shed or crawlspace.

ShoulderThingThatGoesUp

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Re: Confess your irrational fears
« Reply #2 on: August 02, 2016, 11:30:07 AM »
Every plane flight I've been on for the past five years, I've been convinced we were about to crash at least once during the flight. As the engine noise goes away during preparation for landing, I have to say to myself "Gotta slow down to get down. Gotta slow down to get down."

russianswinga

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Re: Confess your irrational fears
« Reply #3 on: August 02, 2016, 05:06:40 PM »
Fear that I will meet the 4% or 25X spending rule, retire, and the market will immediately tank 50%

woopwoop

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Re: Confess your irrational fears
« Reply #4 on: August 02, 2016, 05:17:58 PM »
Fear:  that something will cut open my wrists if I hold them facing upwards. I blame this on watching one of the Nightmare on Elm Street movies when I was a kid when the guy cut open some lady's wrists and used her tendons as puppetstrings.

Reality: Uh, it's totally irrational for me to fear this.

yourusernamehere

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Re: Confess your irrational fears
« Reply #5 on: August 02, 2016, 06:19:08 PM »

Fear:  If I bowl like a normal human then when I try to let the ball loose down the alley my fingers will get stuck and they will break.

Reality: See MrsWhipple's fine explanation. (But mostly I don't go bowling.)

IndyPendent

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Re: Confess your irrational fears
« Reply #6 on: August 02, 2016, 07:20:04 PM »
Fear that I will meet the 4% or 25X spending rule, retire, and the market will immediately tank 50%

I have this too!


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YogiKitti

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #7 on: August 02, 2016, 11:22:54 PM »
My irrational fear is that if I ride a road bike the skinny tire will get stuck in a crack and I will crash horribly.

marty998

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #8 on: August 03, 2016, 02:14:39 AM »
My irrational fear is that if I ride a road bike the skinny tire will get stuck in a crack and I will crash horribly.

I never ever step on cracks in concrete. There is absolutely no basis for why. I just don't do it.

gooki

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #9 on: August 03, 2016, 02:58:50 AM »
Step on a crack marry a rat. Step in a hole marry a mole.

Making Cookies

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #10 on: August 03, 2016, 07:26:20 AM »
I fear the leadership at my job will do something unwise and submarine the whole operation suddenly. Like overnight. And they won't I know but I still worry about it.

Am getting to that age when I ought to be earning my best money and looking forward to regular retirement. What if I had to rejoin the job market?

Edited: for content b/c the first 500 revisions aren't good enough.

frugalnacho

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #11 on: August 03, 2016, 09:35:37 AM »
Spiders.  I hate em.  More than I know I should.

CheapskateWife

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #12 on: August 03, 2016, 09:42:39 AM »
Zombies...they are under my bed, just waiting to grab my ankles and drag me under to dine on my fine brains.

Zikoris

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #13 on: August 03, 2016, 10:03:16 AM »
Open closet doors. Flying insects if they're indoors (outside is fine). The dark.

Fortunately, I have a very understanding and accommodating SO.

GrumpyPenguin

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Re: Confess your irrational fears
« Reply #14 on: August 03, 2016, 11:47:50 AM »
Fear that I will meet the 4% or 25X spending rule, retire, and the market will immediately tank 50%

I have this too!


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Me three!

eljefe-speaks

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #15 on: August 03, 2016, 11:55:51 AM »
Trump

Kaspian

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #16 on: August 03, 2016, 12:11:21 PM »
Crocodiles, alligators, and zombies.  ....Other than those, I have no real fears.  (Except maybe that I someday get married and she ends up being a total shrew?)

I do have full-on panic attacks though when I'm in an enclosed place where there's lots of people and no windows (e.g., every mall and department store out there.)  Seriously--if I was told I had to spend a week in a mall or fight a lion in hand-to-hand combat, I guess me and kitty cat would have to go at it.  For some reason I'm fine in airports and at rock concerts--so that part is good.
« Last Edit: August 03, 2016, 12:14:55 PM by Kaspian »

Digital Dogma

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #17 on: August 03, 2016, 02:04:12 PM »
Fear: Everything in the road is nails. Bag? Bag of nails. Box? Box of nails. Roadkill? Died eating a box of nails, now contains nails.

Reality: Only 1/3 of the objects I pull out of my tire are nails.

cube.37

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #18 on: August 03, 2016, 02:33:45 PM »
While I'm washing out the shampoo in my hair with my eyes closed, someone will come up behind me and slit my throat...

iris lily

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #19 on: August 03, 2016, 02:51:30 PM »
My dog is stolen from my yard. DH is shot while working in our gardens over in the adjoining neighborhood.

We,live in an urban core so it is not entirely irrational.

Re:spiders--I have pet daddy long legs spiders, so some of you should never visit me. I let thir webs alne and watch out doe them. Our current kitchen spider has been there about two weeks.

Lanthiriel

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #20 on: August 03, 2016, 02:57:20 PM »
Fear: I have this nagging fear of losing my job and being unable to find another job that pays as much (thus severely impacting my time-to-FI).

Reality: This is doubly irrational as I contrast it with my first fear! I work in a growth industry, and my role directly produces revenue. By all metrics, I'm doing fine and may even be slightly better than average (I've confirmed this with my management and in my own metrics). I have no debt (not even a mortgage!) and thousands and thousands of dollars saved up. I could quit now and live for years without starving. I have a genuine desire to improve, and a willingness to listen. I am a highly employable person.

I have this fear too and am more in your boat, thank goodness. Unfortunately my husband recently lost his job, and it's looking exceedingly likely that he will not be able to entirely replace his income. So this fear has become a reality for me. Yay life.

Fear: Everything in the road is nails. Bag? Bag of nails. Box? Box of nails. Roadkill? Died eating a box of nails, now contains nails.

Reality: Only 1/3 of the objects I pull out of my tire are nails.

I have a similar fear except that I think all bags and boxes are full of... kittens. In the Disney movie Oliver and Company, little Oliver is left in a box after his siblings are given away and then gets washed around busy streets dodging cars. Watching this movie as a child, I apparently found this so traumatizing that I made an involuntary sad sound every time I see a box on the side of the road and my husband asks, "kittens?" and then laughs at me. Which is reasonable.

Making Cookies

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #21 on: August 03, 2016, 03:20:06 PM »
Trump

Thank you for that. Not to derail the discussion but this guy has to be some sort of genius or loon.

Dancing Fool

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #22 on: August 03, 2016, 03:54:04 PM »
After watching any sort of horror movie / TV show or reading a book in the same genre: fear that something terrifying will pop out of the dark and attack me in my home. This probably led to some "WTF is going on?" thoughts from my parents if they heard me sprinting up from the living room when I was a teenager and habitually staying up later than them (I still do as a young adult, but I don't still live with them). I'm pretty good at rationally talking myself out of it now (DIY CBT?) but I also intentionally avoid that genre whenever possible.

Chris22

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #23 on: August 03, 2016, 04:06:26 PM »
Re:spiders--I have pet daddy long legs spiders, so some of you should never visit me. I let thir webs alne and watch out doe them. Our current kitchen spider has been there about two weeks.

I'm not even that scared of spiders, I have just this fear that I'll be in a small space and a spider will pop up out of nowhere and jump on me and I won't be able to maneuver to get it off, or something.  Not sure.  I see spiders just chillin' when I'm in the yard, and I'm cool with them.

Exhale

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #24 on: August 03, 2016, 05:54:48 PM »
Pre-FIRE I had THE FEAR (as I called it, all in caps) that I'd die or be horribly disabled before I could RE and enjoy that sweet freedom.

1. THE FEAR (see above)
2. Lack of sufficient health care (I live with a chronic illness)

TheGrimSqueaker

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #25 on: August 03, 2016, 09:43:49 PM »
I'm afraid my offspring will be an absolute spendaholic imbecile with money despite my best efforts.

iris lily

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #26 on: August 03, 2016, 10:37:06 PM »
Oh yeah, creapster int he shower when
I have soap n my eyes--
I have that fear.

Mechancal failure in vehicles of any oind, yes, have that too.

scrubbyfish

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #27 on: August 03, 2016, 11:21:46 PM »
A couple of days ago, I got very confused at a sign about pets. I genuinely wondered for some moments if I was one. Then I managed to convince myself I'm human.

And yet, this thread makes me feel so sane ;)

Love it, following!

onehair

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #28 on: August 04, 2016, 08:48:57 AM »
Fireworks, balloons, anything explosive including guns-I have had this fear since I was small I don't know why.  It used to be worse when I was little my mom claims I would have an accident out of fear.  Now I avoid them and if they're far from me I can function and usually hide on 4th of July especially.  On the upside you will never see me at war re enactments.

Goldielocks

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Re: Confess your irrational fears
« Reply #29 on: August 04, 2016, 10:40:32 AM »

Fear:  If I bowl like a normal human then when I try to let the ball loose down the alley my fingers will get stuck and they will break.

Reality: See MrsWhipple's fine explanation. (But mostly I don't go bowling.)

I have broken / smashed a finger (just the tip) this way.   I was very uncoordinated.  Try 5 pin bowling instead -- no holes.

Making Cookies

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #30 on: August 04, 2016, 12:43:20 PM »
I'm years behind on TV. Haven't seen most of the various series that have gotten the most attention in the media or pop-culture. On the topic of zombies - I've only seen a few shows/movies so the genre isn't worn out for me yet.

I'm very early into the Walking Dead series. I watch a few episodes a year?

I also like to walk our dog after the kids go to bed. So ~10PM, walking alone through the dark semi-rural neighborhood. No street lights which I prefer. Just a few porch lights here and there.

I don't watch WD on the nights I take that walk anymore.

One night I nearly walked into a teenager in the dark that I think was sneaking out of the house and waiting for his ride around the corner from his house.

Months later I think it was him that almost ran over me on a bicycle in the dark with no lights on. All I heard was his feet dragging on the street when they slipped off of the pedals. I think I scared him as much as he scared me both times. i think he tried to brake but his feet slipped off of the pedals. Didn't know what that sound was coming at me in the dark. Animal? Monster? Supernatural?

I generally carry some sort of small flashlight but not always. 
« Last Edit: August 05, 2016, 07:24:54 AM by Joe Lucky »

OurTown

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #31 on: August 04, 2016, 01:04:17 PM »
Quote
Trump

I'm pretty sure he's actually Andy Kaufman.

GuitarStv

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #32 on: August 04, 2016, 01:11:24 PM »
I'm deeply concerned about the environmental impact that people are having on the planet, particularly since there seems to be little real attempt to mitigate the problem while it's somewhat controllable.  It makes me wonder what kind of world my son will grow up and live in.

PencilThinStash

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #33 on: August 04, 2016, 01:12:12 PM »
Fear: That I'll randomly pass out in the middle of flossing my teeth one night, and the floss will cut off the circulation to my index fingers long enough that the tissue will die and I'll have to get the fingers amputated when I wake up.

Reality: My dentist friend makes fun of me and will occasionally remind me to be afraid, just in case I've forgotten. She's a twisted one.

forumname123

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Re: Confess your irrational fears
« Reply #34 on: August 04, 2016, 01:18:44 PM »

Fear:  If I bowl like a normal human then when I try to let the ball loose down the alley my fingers will get stuck and they will break.

Reality: See MrsWhipple's fine explanation. (But mostly I don't go bowling.)

I have broken / smashed a finger (just the tip) this way.   I was very uncoordinated.  Try 5 pin bowling instead -- no holes.


I recently learned that 5 pin bowling is purely a Canadian thing. So many blank stares every time I bring it up...

Tay_CPA

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #35 on: August 04, 2016, 01:30:32 PM »
Irrational fear: Pigeons! And other birds flying near me. I feel like they are going to crash straight into my face and get their wings and creepy little talons stuck in my hair. *shudder*

I've screamed and ducked out of the way in public at least three times in the last month as a result of a pigeon flying straight at or near me. To be fair, in one case another girl also screamed at the same time when a pigeon decided to fly very closely between us.

BF pokes lots of fun at me about this fear... I do feel quite ridiculous sometimes.

scrubbyfish

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #36 on: August 04, 2016, 02:21:39 PM »
Oh, I remember mine! Getting mauled by a bear or cougar! (We have both here, including hanging around the yard.)

As a result, I don't hike alone and, since I have no hiking buddy, it means I don't hike at all, and I WANT TO.

I don't know whether it's rational or not. Within three days of declaring I would go for it, one woman near me went missing and another was attacked by a bear. So...???? (Both women are fine now.)

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #37 on: August 04, 2016, 03:17:47 PM »
Irrational fear: Pigeons! And other birds flying near me. I feel like they are going to crash straight into my face and get their wings and creepy little talons stuck in my hair. *shudder*

I've screamed and ducked out of the way in public at least three times in the last month as a result of a pigeon flying straight at or near me. To be fair, in one case another girl also screamed at the same time when a pigeon decided to fly very closely between us.

BF pokes lots of fun at me about this fear... I do feel quite ridiculous sometimes.

Nonsense! A timely dodge prevented you from being the victim of a drive-by shitting.

Tay_CPA

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #38 on: August 04, 2016, 03:34:58 PM »
Irrational fear: Pigeons! And other birds flying near me. I feel like they are going to crash straight into my face and get their wings and creepy little talons stuck in my hair. *shudder*

I've screamed and ducked out of the way in public at least three times in the last month as a result of a pigeon flying straight at or near me. To be fair, in one case another girl also screamed at the same time when a pigeon decided to fly very closely between us.

BF pokes lots of fun at me about this fear... I do feel quite ridiculous sometimes.

Nonsense! A timely dodge prevented you from being the victim of a drive-by shitting.

Hahaha well thank you, I appreciate the support. A bird actually shat directly on my face as I walked under a tree several years ago. Thinking it was water or something, I instinctively reached up to wipe it off then had to run into the nearest building to find a bathroom with bird poo on both my face and hand... I think my fear of birds intensified after that XD

Aimza

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #39 on: August 04, 2016, 03:37:40 PM »
Fear: If I put a sock or shoe on my right foot first instead of my left foot, something bad will happen.

Reality: I purposely do this sometimes just to test fate, but then I'm scared of what will happen. I guess I'm a daredevil.

yourusernamehere

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #40 on: August 04, 2016, 04:10:43 PM »

Fear:  If I bowl like a normal human then when I try to let the ball loose down the alley my fingers will get stuck and they will break.

Reality: See MrsWhipple's fine explanation. (But mostly I don't go bowling.)

I have broken / smashed a finger (just the tip) this way.   I was very uncoordinated.  Try 5 pin bowling instead -- no holes.


I recently learned that 5 pin bowling is purely a Canadian thing. So many blank stares every time I bring it up...

Luckily I'm in South Canada (Niagara Falls NY), so I've heard of it! I've never done it though, so I had no idea about the lack of holes.

Also I'm not at all thrilled to learn that this has actually happened, goldilocks! Hope it wasn't too painful for you. Only 5 pin bowling from now on!

nnls

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #41 on: August 04, 2016, 05:36:56 PM »
I have to walk on the right hand side of people (so they are always on my left) or else I feel uncomfortable and like something very bad is going to happen.

I also have different coloured pegs I have to use on each line of my clothes line when drying laundry, as in one line has blue pegs, one has grey, one black and so on.

When I was a kid I had heaps of different things (food eaten in colour and clockwise order, couldn't wear certain colours on certain days), but I am a lot less irrational now.

bobechs

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #42 on: August 04, 2016, 06:05:30 PM »
My irrational fear is that if I ride a road bike the skinny tire will get stuck in a crack and I will crash horribly.

I never ever step on cracks in concrete. There is absolutely no basis for why. I just don't do it.

Sure there is a basis, and a damned good one: you'll break your mother's back.

Reclassify this one rational.

Lia-Aimee

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #43 on: August 04, 2016, 06:12:28 PM »
Fear: That people are dead. Specifically, that someone is dead when he or she doesn't answer his/her phone.  This is primarily limited to my parents, s.o. and sister, but I have this fear with friends and even colleagues & clients when they don't pick up the phone.

Reality: Well it's likely that my parents and s.o. will pass away before me, but otherwise it has me checking twitter for traffic accidents a lot (found out my dad was in hospital this way before my mum knew, so, there's some benefit?") Also it made dating quite interesting - boyfriend doesn't pick up his phone? Please be cheating on me instead of dead!

iris lily

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #44 on: August 04, 2016, 06:57:37 PM »
Our friend had an irrational fear of rats coming up through his toilet in the basement. But then, he did see claw marks around the toilet. Ugh. This was so e years ago.

Last night he said he saw a rat eating cat food in his kitchen. Ugh.

I think he has rat problems.

nnls

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #45 on: August 04, 2016, 07:15:25 PM »
Fear: That people are dead. Specifically, that someone is dead when he or she doesn't answer his/her phone.  This is primarily limited to my parents, s.o. and sister, but I have this fear with friends and even colleagues & clients when they don't pick up the phone.

Reality: Well it's likely that my parents and s.o. will pass away before me, but otherwise it has me checking twitter for traffic accidents a lot (found out my dad was in hospital this way before my mum knew, so, there's some benefit?") Also it made dating quite interesting - boyfriend doesn't pick up his phone? Please be cheating on me instead of dead!

I have something similiar to this, but also get worried when someone calls me, I always assume its bad news. So if my aunt calls I assume its to tell me my mum has passed away, if my boss calls I assume its to tell me I am fired.

IndyPendent

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #46 on: August 04, 2016, 08:13:00 PM »
These are awesome and make me feel like I'm in good company (i.e. not crazy, or at least not crazier than others). Keep 'em coming!

Cyaphas

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #47 on: August 04, 2016, 08:28:46 PM »
Clinton will win the presidency.

Trump will win the presidency.

My children will grow up in chains while constantly being told they're free.

Babies. (Always afraid I'm going to drop them or something. So precious.)

Zombies. The real ones.

People with nothing to lose.

Nervous people in positions of power.

My huberis.

Dieing in some senseless random way. (Hitting my head on a curb after I tripped or something.)

Nothing. (In the sense that some time in the future there may actually only be nothing. No stars. No planets or life. Just nothing.)

Idiots and the power they wield.

EDIT:

Clowns. Creepy as hell.

Crowds. I'm usually afraid I may run someone over or lose track of the people I'm with.




« Last Edit: August 04, 2016, 08:39:18 PM by Cyaphas »

Typhoid Mary

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #48 on: August 04, 2016, 08:44:27 PM »
My most active irrational fear is somewhat rational because it could happen, but the chances are minuscule so it's mostly irrational, but I obsess about active shooter situations in our local schools. I have two elementary aged daughters and also recently became employed in the local school system. We have active shooter drills (like fire drills or tornado drills only way more fun) and then I have nightmares about my kids getting shot in the hallway at school and they are left to bleed in the hallway and die by themselves and then I wake up crying. It's awesome.   /sarcasm

JAYSLOL

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Re: Confess your irrational (or rational) fears
« Reply #49 on: August 04, 2016, 10:42:43 PM »
Fear: Everything in the road is nails. Bag? Bag of nails. Box? Box of nails. Roadkill? Died eating a box of nails, now contains nails.

Reality: Only 1/3 of the objects I pull out of my tire are nails.

LOL, i liked this one.

Mine is probably food, that if i make something that I didn't cook it or prepare it right and it'll kill me.  I know it irrational because i have zero fear of anything that anyone else cooks and i haven't died yet from my cooking.