Author Topic: Breakfast of Champions  (Read 6244 times)

Guitarist

  • Stubble
  • **
  • Posts: 210
  • Age: 32
  • Location: Kansas City
Breakfast of Champions
« on: March 06, 2012, 07:14:10 AM »
Walked behind a guy this morning. Smoking a cigarette and carrying a 32 ouncer of soda... 32oz. of soda at 7am.
He was also carrying a tire around his midsection.

onehappypanda

  • Stubble
  • **
  • Posts: 238
  • Location: Columbus, Ohio
Re: Breakfast of Champions
« Reply #1 on: March 06, 2012, 07:38:37 AM »
Full confession:

In a past life, I used to drink a 20oz soda and have a package of poptarts (brown sugar FTW) for breakfast. Every.Single.Day.
Oh and I got both from the overpriced vending machine at work. Because that's cost efficient.

Nowadays thinking of eating poptarts, much less washing it down with a bottle of soda, kinda makes me want to yak. I use this as proof that anybody can change ;)

AJ

  • Pencil Stache
  • ****
  • Posts: 906
  • Age: 36
  • Location: Oregon
Re: Breakfast of Champions
« Reply #2 on: March 06, 2012, 11:01:51 AM »
I'll confess to having soda for breakfast as well. But, my objection to it is just that soda is an unnecessary cost...not really sure why the time of day matters. Oh, but then again, I drink the fake-sugar stuff. I guess 200 calories of corn syrup wouldn't feel so great on the tummy first thing in the morning...

Danielle

  • 5 O'Clock Shadow
  • *
  • Posts: 38
  • Age: 33
  • Location: Austin, TX
  • Junior 'stachian
Re: Breakfast of Champions
« Reply #3 on: March 06, 2012, 11:45:18 AM »
A martini is the true breakfast of champions! ;)

kolorado

  • Bristles
  • ***
  • Posts: 368
Re: Breakfast of Champions
« Reply #4 on: March 06, 2012, 06:10:42 PM »
Yikes. I had a few coworkers who did this. A family member also starts her days this way. She "can't" eat breakfast. *sigh*
I've never smoked a cigarette in my life so I have no clue what the craving for them is like. But I've seen several movies where the characters hit the alarm clock and light up before even getting out of bed. I just can't imagine the appeal of breathing a bonfire still half asleep and in pj's. Blech.

Grigory

  • Stubble
  • **
  • Posts: 228
  • Location: Seattle, WA
  • (rhymes with "story")
    • my attempt at blogging
Re: Breakfast of Champions
« Reply #5 on: March 06, 2012, 08:15:18 PM »
Devil's advocate: what if he was getting the soda so early for his pregnant wife, found a nice tire along the way and, being a good Mustachian, decided to pick it up and store it in his garage? ;) (That's not impossible - merely improbable!)

...and am i the only person who thought this thread was about the wealthy character in Kurt Vonnegut's novel "Breakfast of Champions"?..

Guitarist

  • Stubble
  • **
  • Posts: 210
  • Age: 32
  • Location: Kansas City
Re: Breakfast of Champions
« Reply #6 on: March 06, 2012, 08:45:04 PM »
Unless his wife works where he does, I doubt it.
Nice try on the optimism though :-)

Grigory

  • Stubble
  • **
  • Posts: 228
  • Location: Seattle, WA
  • (rhymes with "story")
    • my attempt at blogging
Re: Breakfast of Champions
« Reply #7 on: March 06, 2012, 09:22:02 PM »
Things aren't always what they seem. In fact, one might even say they never are...

AJ

  • Pencil Stache
  • ****
  • Posts: 906
  • Age: 36
  • Location: Oregon
Re: Breakfast of Champions
« Reply #8 on: March 06, 2012, 09:37:27 PM »
Now I'm confused, is this a literal or figurative tire? Because I judge this man in an entirely new way if it is literal... ;)

Danielle

  • 5 O'Clock Shadow
  • *
  • Posts: 38
  • Age: 33
  • Location: Austin, TX
  • Junior 'stachian
Re: Breakfast of Champions
« Reply #9 on: March 07, 2012, 08:10:16 AM »
...and am i the only person who thought this thread was about the wealthy character in Kurt Vonnegut's novel "Breakfast of Champions"?..

Guess you missed the subtly of my post above :)

Guitarist

  • Stubble
  • **
  • Posts: 210
  • Age: 32
  • Location: Kansas City
Re: Breakfast of Champions
« Reply #10 on: March 07, 2012, 08:45:42 AM »
Now I'm confused, is this a literal or figurative tire? Because I judge this man in an entirely new way if it is literal... ;)

figurative ;-)
I guess his thought process is: screw the 6 pack, I'll take the keg.

Guitarist

  • Stubble
  • **
  • Posts: 210
  • Age: 32
  • Location: Kansas City
Re: Breakfast of Champions
« Reply #11 on: March 07, 2012, 08:47:00 AM »
Things aren't always what they seem. In fact, one might even say they never are...

Sucking on a cig from one side of the mouth, sucking on a straw on the other. A little cushion around the belt area. Naw, in this case, it was pretty obvious.

Grigory

  • Stubble
  • **
  • Posts: 228
  • Location: Seattle, WA
  • (rhymes with "story")
    • my attempt at blogging
Re: Breakfast of Champions
« Reply #12 on: March 07, 2012, 08:35:30 PM »
Guess you missed the subtly of my post above :)
*hangs his head in shame*

Sucking on a cig from one side of the mouth, sucking on a straw on the other. A little cushion around the belt area. Naw, in this case, it was pretty obvious.
Your original post didn't say anything about him drinking the soda. :^p i thought you guys had weird 32oz soda bottles in Kansas haha

Guitarist

  • Stubble
  • **
  • Posts: 210
  • Age: 32
  • Location: Kansas City
Re: Breakfast of Champions
« Reply #13 on: March 15, 2012, 08:48:51 PM »
It's how we work our biceps ;-)

James

  • Handlebar Stache
  • *****
  • Posts: 1680
  • Age: 46
  • Location: Rice Lake, WI
Re: Breakfast of Champions
« Reply #14 on: March 21, 2012, 09:45:29 AM »
I'm guilty of the occasional can of diet coke for breakfast, but I get them in 24 packs and keep them in the fridge at work.  Sometimes I'll also have one or two of the small packages of graham crackers they give out free in the break room at work, but otherwise I have nothing until lunch.  I keep thinking I should learn to eat a decent breakfast, but I guess this proves there's worse things I could be doing...  :)