The point is that I don't enjoy it, and I don't appreciate being forced to do things I don't enjoy. And I would like to enjoy my own wedding, not just hold an event that meets some arbitrary criteria of what other people enjoy.
I assumed, but you didn't really ever say you didn't enjoy it, just that you were bad at it and didn't want to follow norms. Hence my gentle prodding.
Since we're trying to make each other feel bad, your wedding was thus not enjoyable?
My wedding was way more than a "party" to me! That gets straight upgraded to "kick-ass life milestone" on par with buying a house and early retirment when you're the bride or groom. Trying to make you feel bad? I think Russ has it right, sometimes it is hard not to be overly enthusiastic when life is so awesome. Hell, I even stated that you were clearly throwing a good party with the inclusion of board games and my first post clearly stated I had to have dancing at
my wedding, but would happily go to one that didn't.
Plus, don't assume it is ludicrously expensive to do a "traditional" (what does this even mean?) wedding with a DJ (or speakers + MP3 player) and alcohol. I've been to weddings in fancy halls on top on a hill to ones in their back yard. They had wedding dresses, cake, flowers, food, rings, music, dancing, alcohol...and vastly different price tags. Mine was in a nice hall, had all these things and was under $10K including rings and honeymoon. Probably appalling to some people reading this right now, but it was what my wife and I wanted and was easily in our budget. Judging people's expenses on the low or high (to an extent) side for something like a wedding is pointless, because it isn't a normal purchase.
I'm going to take the other side. People are (usually) traveling from all over to come watch you get married, give you gifts, and catch up with the rest of the family, etc. You don't have to bend to your guests' every whim, but being a good host is taking into consideration that they'll enjoy themselves. At the very least, working with the assumption that the event is for the guests is a precautionary measure against getting too self-centered, since most of the day is already structured all around the bride and groom.
But really when you invite someone who isn't your close friend/family to a wedding you are saying: "Hey, I happen to be getting married at this date and are going to celebrate afterwards. If you want to come you can." People should be there to celebrate the couple's marriage, not get a few dollars worth of food and drink. People feeling obligated to go because they were invited shouldn't have to be accomadated specifically by the couple. There is a deeper societal issue with obligation in general for this that I think would take a lot more discussion.