Author Topic: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.  (Read 8288 times)

Tempe

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Words spoken by a 15 year old I know. Her parents were going to buy her a phone until they looked at the monthly costs of some of the iphones and went, nope! I really find it sad that everyone is getting hooked to the expensive phones younger and younger and parents are paying for them. So much money being sucked away. I did tell her mom about republic wireless since they are still planning to get her a phone, so they seem to be leaning towards that at least.
 The other thing that was making me sad is how many kids struggle with reading. I tutored a couple in reading skills, they are so far behind. Part of that is growing up with parents that don't prefer to speak english so they don't help out with the reading.  Said 15 year old was reading a book and struggling with it and the age group for it was 10-14. I remember reading the book when I was 11(Of course the only reason I remember that was because I accidentally stole it forgetting it at home and the teachers name the class grade was on it.) I see a lot of my second cousins are struggling with reading as well around those ages.
« Last Edit: July 24, 2014, 01:10:03 PM by Tempe »

johnintaiwan

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #1 on: July 18, 2014, 07:30:36 PM »
I get students as young as 1st grade laughing at my old nokia with a cracked screen. They ask where my real phone is. They don't believe that is my real phone and I don't have a smart phone somewhere.

Tempe

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #2 on: July 18, 2014, 07:39:15 PM »
I get students as young as 1st grade laughing at my old nokia with a cracked screen. They ask where my real phone is. They don't believe that is my real phone and I don't have a smart phone somewhere.
Wow. I had a flip phone as my first phone and I had it until last month. The only reason I got a newer phone was that in the long run it was cheaper per month.

gimp

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #3 on: July 18, 2014, 07:58:59 PM »
Tell her that there are engineers at Apple at the Cupertino headquarters who don't have iPhones because of personal preference, so there's nothing to feel bad about. Bonus: 100% truth. "Think about how cool the people at apple are. Now think about how awesome the ones who don't go with the flow are. If they can, you can too." That part may be bullshit, but who cares?

Or don't, whatever.

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #4 on: July 18, 2014, 09:35:45 PM »
I sympathize with the teen.  Nobody likes being left out but teenagers are always developing socially and don't always have the emotional constitution to deal with it.  Plus, iPhones are awesome.  But that doesn't mean mommy and daddy should cave.  Frugal parents means the kid won't get shellacked supporting them in retirement and there will likely be a fat inheritance.  And if nothing else there's no time like the present to work that emotional constitution bucking peer pressure.  That can pay its own dividends.

Middlesbrough

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #5 on: July 19, 2014, 02:11:27 AM »
I am young. I just got out of thee college scene recently. I didn't get a cellphone until I was in college. I didn't have texting until I was a sophomore in college.

I was kind of happier with the days when people couldn't instantly find me accessible. It was so much simpler. Now with work, the cellphone is a must.

EricL

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #6 on: July 19, 2014, 05:26:13 AM »
I am young. I just got out of thee college scene recently. I didn't get a cellphone until I was in college. I didn't have texting until I was a sophomore in college.

I was kind of happier with the days when people couldn't instantly find me accessible. It was so much simpler. Now with work, the cellphone is a must.

Yuck!  iPhones are awesome because of their tools, games, instant research capabilities, and toys.  But that's their appeal to me.  Being available 24/7 to random idiots, or worse, specific idiots, isn't.  That's why I dodged cell phones for years.  Is you job that important or is it just your employer's opinion it is that you have such a leash?

GuitarStv

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #7 on: July 19, 2014, 08:15:00 AM »
I figure I'll jump on this cellphone bandwagon and pick one up if it ever becomes important.  Hasn't so far though. . . although I've noticed it's harder to find a pay phone these days.

AH013

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #8 on: July 19, 2014, 09:43:15 AM »
Gosh, what's the problem?  When the iPhone 6 comes out you give your 15 year old the ancient iPhone 5s you had.  Free phone from the generosity of your favorite cell carrier, problem solved!

</sarcasm>

Consumerism is really sad.  But that said, an unlocked used iPhone 4s can be had for under $100 if the kid thinks a $20-$40 new budget android isn't cool enough.  I agree the phone addiction is epidemic, but I think any kid old enough to use a phone should at least have a $20-30 android, even if it doesn't have service -- the ability to communicate where wifi is, use GPS anywhere if they are lost, and call 911 and be tracked by police if needed is worth the minor investment.

Middlesbrough

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #9 on: July 19, 2014, 06:24:34 PM »
I am young. I just got out of thee college scene recently. I didn't get a cellphone until I was in college. I didn't have texting until I was a sophomore in college.

I was kind of happier with the days when people couldn't instantly find me accessible. It was so much simpler. Now with work, the cellphone is a must.

Yuck!  iPhones are awesome because of their tools, games, instant research capabilities, and toys.  But that's their appeal to me.  Being available 24/7 to random idiots, or worse, specific idiots, isn't.  That's why I dodged cell phones for years.  Is you job that important or is it just your employer's opinion it is that you have such a leash?
I don't have a home phone so a cell phone is my main way of keeping in touch with family and friends. It has its uses.

I work in consulting, so being available all the time everyday is considered "necessary" and the norm. My supervisor can call me at any time to tell me to jump and my  expected response is how high? This isn't a often occurrence, but it happens now and again. Usually occurs when I am out of the office and on location somewhere.

The funny thing is  I have an iPhone. It has all those great apps, gadgets, and things to convenience your life (I always seem to notice I tend to only use the internet function and music, hmmm). The difference is mine only cost for the initial investment. I don't pay $150 dollars a month for it. It only connects to that precious wifi, but between the office and coffee shops that shit is almost everywhere! When I didn't have a smart phone, my coworkers thought it was crazy I didn't have the new iPhone 5 or then the 5s and next the 6. I just laugh and say I do have one. It's right here and I paid once for it what you pay every month for yours. They usually get a funny look on their face and then try to attempt a reason why their way is superior.

(If you can't tell, I own a iPod. Insert face punch here. It did make some Mustachian activities in college easier, but it still cost one pretty penny.)

EricL

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #10 on: July 20, 2014, 06:19:19 AM »
I am young. I just got out of thee college scene recently. I didn't get a cellphone until I was in college. I didn't have texting until I was a sophomore in college.

I was kind of happier with the days when people couldn't instantly find me accessible. It was so much simpler. Now with work, the cellphone is a must.

Yuck!  iPhones are awesome because of their tools, games, instant research capabilities, and toys.  But that's their appeal to me.  Being available 24/7 to random idiots, or worse, specific idiots, isn't.  That's why I dodged cell phones for years.  Is you job that important or is it just your employer's opinion it is that you have such a leash?
I don't have a home phone so a cell phone is my main way of keeping in touch with family and friends. It has its uses.

I work in consulting, so being available all the time everyday is considered "necessary" and the norm. My supervisor can call me at any time to tell me to jump and my  expected response is how high? This isn't a often occurrence, but it happens now and again. Usually occurs when I am out of the office and on location somewhere.

The funny thing is  I have an iPhone. It has all those great apps, gadgets, and things to convenience your life (I always seem to notice I tend to only use the internet function and music, hmmm). The difference is mine only cost for the initial investment. I don't pay $150 dollars a month for it. It only connects to that precious wifi, but between the office and coffee shops that shit is almost everywhere! When I didn't have a smart phone, my coworkers thought it was crazy I didn't have the new iPhone 5 or then the 5s and next the 6. I just laugh and say I do have one. It's right here and I paid once for it what you pay every month for yours. They usually get a funny look on their face and then try to attempt a reason why their way is superior.

(If you can't tell, I own a iPod. Insert face punch here. It did make some Mustachian activities in college easier, but it still cost one pretty penny.)

Being on call that way sucks.  But the iPod (presumably video iPod) thing is genius.  They hold their value pretty good for that pretty penny.

Middlesbrough

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #11 on: July 20, 2014, 10:36:41 PM »
I am young. I just got out of thee college scene recently. I didn't get a cellphone until I was in college. I didn't have texting until I was a sophomore in college.

I was kind of happier with the days when people couldn't instantly find me accessible. It was so much simpler. Now with work, the cellphone is a must.

Yuck!  iPhones are awesome because of their tools, games, instant research capabilities, and toys.  But that's their appeal to me.  Being available 24/7 to random idiots, or worse, specific idiots, isn't.  That's why I dodged cell phones for years.  Is you job that important or is it just your employer's opinion it is that you have such a leash?
I don't have a home phone so a cell phone is my main way of keeping in touch with family and friends. It has its uses.

I work in consulting, so being available all the time everyday is considered "necessary" and the norm. My supervisor can call me at any time to tell me to jump and my  expected response is how high? This isn't a often occurrence, but it happens now and again. Usually occurs when I am out of the office and on location somewhere.

The funny thing is  I have an iPhone. It has all those great apps, gadgets, and things to convenience your life (I always seem to notice I tend to only use the internet function and music, hmmm). The difference is mine only cost for the initial investment. I don't pay $150 dollars a month for it. It only connects to that precious wifi, but between the office and coffee shops that shit is almost everywhere! When I didn't have a smart phone, my coworkers thought it was crazy I didn't have the new iPhone 5 or then the 5s and next the 6. I just laugh and say I do have one. It's right here and I paid once for it what you pay every month for yours. They usually get a funny look on their face and then try to attempt a reason why their way is superior.

(If you can't tell, I own a iPod. Insert face punch here. It did make some Mustachian activities in college easier, but it still cost one pretty penny.)

Being on call that way sucks.  But the iPod (presumably video iPod) thing is genius.  They hold their value pretty good for that pretty penny.
The really funny part is that iPods seem to be on their way out. There hasn't been an updated version for quite some time and I can't even get the latest iOS (they stop updates after 2 years). There are some apps I can't get that I want due to the age of my device. I look at the consumerism taking place here and laugh. I would really like some of the conveniences, but can't imagine dropping the money I once did for my device. The iPhone dominates the market so well the iPod probably won't be a future device that is sold. It sucks my iPod will continue to only serve my basic needs and none of my other petty wants. So sad.

golden1

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #12 on: July 21, 2014, 05:40:23 AM »
Smart phones are a nice tool for a teen to have, and I don't begrudge a teen for wanting one, but that being said, at a certain age there is no reason a teen can't work to afford one on his/her own.  Even at age 13-14, a kid can baby sit on weekends and earn enough to pay for the phone in a few months.  A basic cell plan is about $15 a month with some limited data and  that  is  just a few hours of babysitting too. 

I wanted a way to contact my daughter and gave her one of my old iphones at a pretty young age.  She pays for the monthly charge out of her allowance, and she understands when she is old enough to work, she pays her own portion of the family plan monthly.  She also understands this is the only "free" phone she gets.  If she loses or breaks it, she has to buy another one.

ltt

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #13 on: July 21, 2014, 06:07:15 AM »
I have an Iphone--but I'm old.  My two teen sons carry Samsungs--we upgraded from the flip phones.  What a waste of money--I should have just had them continue to use the flip phones.  And the monthly charges are outrageous!!  And one of our pre-teen daughters wants either an Iphone or a Samsung.  I've said "no", but I am willing to buy her a trac phone.  She refuses.  It's not cool enough.  Her loss.

galliver

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #14 on: July 21, 2014, 10:30:34 AM »
Part of that is growing up with parents that don't prefer to speak english so they don't help out with the reading.  Said 15 year old was reading a book and struggling with it and the age group for it was 10-14. I remember reading the book when I was 11(Of course the only reason I remember that was because I accidentally stole it forgetting it at home and the teachers name the class grade was on it.) I see a lot of my second cousins are struggling with reading as well around those ages.

Speaking another language in the home is not an excuse for poor reading skills. In principle knowing multiple languages makes you better at languages in general...though that may not work as well with vastly different language families, but I'm sure there's something to be gained from knowing both. What would matter is whether the parents are avid readers themselves, if they model that behavior (even if in a different language) and stress its value. I always saw my parents reading and they read books to me in our native language. I read in English all on my own after I learned the basics with their help. The only thing that helps with reading is practice, and unfortunately it forms a vicious cycle: the kids that get ahead find reading enjoyable and do it more and get further ahead; the ones that fall behind see it as a chore and a drag and thus avoid it and fall further behind. :(

Best thing you can do is get these kids hooked on a series. Really doesn't matter if it's Tolkien or Meg Cabot or Jane Austen or Hunger Games or Twilight or Harry Potter. Even the junkiest books are still words on paper and the gateway to more advanced works.

Jack

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #15 on: July 21, 2014, 10:57:33 AM »
I get students as young as 1st grade laughing at my old nokia with a cracked screen. They ask where my real phone is. They don't believe that is my real phone and I don't have a smart phone somewhere.

There's nothing wrong with using a non-smartphone if it suits your needs, but really, a cracked screen? Old Nokias are free these days (just ask somebody for a hand-me-down) so there's no excuse to be using a half-broken one.

Middlesbrough

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #16 on: July 21, 2014, 12:35:09 PM »
I get students as young as 1st grade laughing at my old nokia with a cracked screen. They ask where my real phone is. They don't believe that is my real phone and I don't have a smart phone somewhere.

There's nothing wrong with using a non-smartphone if it suits your needs, but really, a cracked screen? Old Nokias are free these days (just ask somebody for a hand-me-down) so there's no excuse to be using a half-broken one.
How do you break a Nokia? I heard that was next to impossible.

Mike2

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #17 on: July 21, 2014, 09:23:57 PM »
I had an old basic flip phone until my work decided to pay for the phone and monthly service for a smartphone.  It is nice to have but I don't think I would keep it if I left my job.

Tempe

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #18 on: July 22, 2014, 08:34:10 AM »
Part of that is growing up with parents that don't prefer to speak english so they don't help out with the reading.  Said 15 year old was reading a book and struggling with it and the age group for it was 10-14. I remember reading the book when I was 11(Of course the only reason I remember that was because I accidentally stole it forgetting it at home and the teachers name the class grade was on it.) I see a lot of my second cousins are struggling with reading as well around those ages.

Speaking another language in the home is not an excuse for poor reading skills. In principle knowing multiple languages makes you better at languages in general...though that may not work as well with vastly different language families, but I'm sure there's something to be gained from knowing both. What would matter is whether the parents are avid readers themselves, if they model that behavior (even if in a different language) and stress its value. I always saw my parents reading and they read books to me in our native language. I read in English all on my own after I learned the basics with their help. The only thing that helps with reading is practice, and unfortunately it forms a vicious cycle: the kids that get ahead find reading enjoyable and do it more and get further ahead; the ones that fall behind see it as a chore and a drag and thus avoid it and fall further behind. :(

Best thing you can do is get these kids hooked on a series. Really doesn't matter if it's Tolkien or Meg Cabot or Jane Austen or Hunger Games or Twilight or Harry Potter. Even the junkiest books are still words on paper and the gateway to more advanced works.
I agree, their parents aren't big readers and don't have many books around in their native language, so they struggle even starting a love of reading when it gets frustrating.The summer assigned reading books are not books the girl would have chosen on her own. I don't know her well enough to suggest books, but I wish I could get her hooked on some series.

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #19 on: July 22, 2014, 08:44:19 AM »
I figure I'll jump on this cellphone bandwagon and pick one up if it ever becomes important.  Hasn't so far though. . . although I've noticed it's harder to find a pay phone these days.
I bought a 30 phone and paid 10 for a pre-Paid Sim card with (for me) 3 free month and 10 on the account.
double ++ It is a dual-Sim, I can use a private Sim card and a - in my case - party card to be able to get costs on the "official" back. Have paid 15 so far this year for this setup (yeah, I dont call often ^^).

Quote
est thing you can do is get these kids hooked on a series. Really doesn't matter if it's Tolkien or Meg Cabot or Jane Austen or Hunger Games or Twilight or Harry Potter. Even the junkiest books are still words on paper and the gateway to more advanced works.
Terry Pratchett (Discworld). Not only learning to read, not only because he is the only author who can have you laugh and cry in the same sentence several times a book, but because Pratchett is a whole education in itself. After "Going postal" and "Making Money" even a young teen can understand the banking crisis easily ;)

Quote
How do you break a Nokia? I heard that was next to impossible.
I heard with High Heels its not very hard. Of course to go through the phone, it has to be the fat opera lady.

galliver

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #20 on: July 22, 2014, 09:42:56 AM »
Quote
Best thing you can do is get these kids hooked on a series. Really doesn't matter if it's Tolkien or Meg Cabot or Jane Austen or Hunger Games or Twilight or Harry Potter. Even the junkiest books are still words on paper and the gateway to more advanced works.
Terry Pratchett (Discworld). Not only learning to read, not only because he is the only author who can have you laugh and cry in the same sentence several times a book, but because Pratchett is a whole education in itself. After "Going postal" and "Making Money" even a young teen can understand the banking crisis easily ;)

Discworld is awesome :) Although I get kind of tired of his writing style after about 1.5 books. It's happened several times. I need to space them out and read something else in between. But, that doesn't necessarily mean I think it's a great series for everyone. My sister had no interest in fantasy beyond HP, but loved her silly little teen romance books. To each their own. :)

eyesonthehorizon

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #21 on: July 23, 2014, 12:52:49 AM »
The only thing that helps with reading is practice, and unfortunately it forms a vicious cycle: the kids that get ahead find reading enjoyable and do it more and get further ahead; the ones that fall behind see it as a chore and a drag and thus avoid it and fall further behind. :(

Best thing you can do is get these kids hooked on a series. Really doesn't matter if it's Tolkien or Meg Cabot or Jane Austen or Hunger Games or Twilight or Harry Potter. Even the junkiest books are still words on paper and the gateway to more advanced works.

I disagree in one point general and one specific and agree vehemently with all else you've said. The general: It matters a lot what you start them on. Hopefully along the lines of Dr. Seuss, because they need to start YOUNG if at all possible, but if you can't wind back the clock on a lost early childhood, introduce them to one really good work. They can read some real trash afterward, but at least they have a standard for comparison, and eventually it'll click into place that the trash is unsatisfying mental junk food. It doesn't take that much to get them started.

The specific: Twilight is specifically a terrible series of lessons to teach any child, or any human for that matter: beauty is all that matters in men or women, suicide and self-destruction are acceptable or even admirable alternatives to singledom or rejection, and if a man beats a woman or otherwise violates her boundaries it means she provoked his strong feelings and is worthy of attention. Also, who cares about their/ they're/ there? Oh, the myriad ways this is Not Okay...

galliver

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #22 on: July 23, 2014, 09:27:29 AM »
The only thing that helps with reading is practice, and unfortunately it forms a vicious cycle: the kids that get ahead find reading enjoyable and do it more and get further ahead; the ones that fall behind see it as a chore and a drag and thus avoid it and fall further behind. :(

Best thing you can do is get these kids hooked on a series. Really doesn't matter if it's Tolkien or Meg Cabot or Jane Austen or Hunger Games or Twilight or Harry Potter. Even the junkiest books are still words on paper and the gateway to more advanced works.

I disagree in one point general and one specific and agree vehemently with all else you've said. The general: It matters a lot what you start them on. Hopefully along the lines of Dr. Seuss, because they need to start YOUNG if at all possible, but if you can't wind back the clock on a lost early childhood, introduce them to one really good work. They can read some real trash afterward, but at least they have a standard for comparison, and eventually it'll click into place that the trash is unsatisfying mental junk food. It doesn't take that much to get them started.

The specific: Twilight is specifically a terrible series of lessons to teach any child, or any human for that matter: beauty is all that matters in men or women, suicide and self-destruction are acceptable or even admirable alternatives to singledom or rejection, and if a man beats a woman or otherwise violates her boundaries it means she provoked his strong feelings and is worthy of attention. Also, who cares about their/ they're/ there? Oh, the myriad ways this is Not Okay...

I agree that it's ideal to start reading to one's kids when they're young and to read them the good stuff. I remember The Jungle Book and The Hobbit way before I was good enough to read them by myself. But if I had only ever read things my parents thought were good, I would not have been the avid reader I became. I would have been bored. I had to experiment and find my own interests. And I was always ahead of the reading curve.

We're talking about someone reading below grade level. They don't need to read to glean life lessons from the pages; they just need to read for practice. I didn't mention Twilight because it's awesome literature (since we both know it's not). I mentioned it because it knocked Harry Potter off the bestseller list. Teenagers read that, willlingly. It's unfortunate for their development as humans but great for their reading. Fortunately, there are other ways to teach someone  life lessons. But there may not be another book they'd be willing to read if you dissuade them from this one. So, I think it's important to support that and go with it, if that's what you have to work with. And teach the life lessons later.

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #23 on: July 23, 2014, 01:31:22 PM »
Smart phones are a nice tool for a teen to have, and I don't begrudge a teen for wanting one, but that being said, at a certain age there is no reason a teen can't work to afford one on his/her own.  Even at age 13-14, a kid can baby sit on weekends and earn enough to pay for the phone in a few months.  A basic cell plan is about $15 a month with some limited data and  that  is  just a few hours of babysitting too. 

I wanted a way to contact my daughter and gave her one of my old iphones at a pretty young age.  She pays for the monthly charge out of her allowance, and she understands when she is old enough to work, she pays her own portion of the family plan monthly.  She also understands this is the only "free" phone she gets.  If she loses or breaks it, she has to buy another one.
If her having a phone is because of your wants and not her's, why is she paying for it? 

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #24 on: July 23, 2014, 01:37:02 PM »
Just tell the kid you know lots of millionaires on the internet and a scant few of them have iphones. 

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #25 on: July 23, 2014, 02:41:44 PM »
I bought my daughter an iphone (unsubsidized) as a Christmas present from parents, grandparents, etc... pooled the resources. In return, she pays the prepaid plan. Turns out she is a mustachian at heart--despite the gross luxury that is an iphone, she probably only spends about $10-15 a month on the phone bill. She does not have data, but relies on available wifi networks at her school, home, and city. She finds ways to use free application to do free stuff that would otherwise cost a lot of money. could she get by with a less expensive phone... hell yeah she could. However, the real cost in communication is the recurring monthly bill, and she has that nailed.

I do not know what she pays for the phone, because she essentially gets ~$85 a week allowance. Before you go nuts, in this $85 she must pay for transport, food, clothing, and all other sundry parts of her consumer life. She lives far away from us going to a the best high school in her country (which turns out to be free because it is in Europe)--so I take the approach of having her learn how to manage her money. it is on autopilot, and she just has to decide what is important to her. I think this is the best way to build the old frugality muscle--

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Re: All my the people at school have iphones and I don't. I feel bad.
« Reply #26 on: July 24, 2014, 09:04:25 AM »
I sympathize with the teen.  Nobody likes being left out but teenagers are always developing socially and don't always have the emotional constitution to deal with it.  Plus, iPhones are awesome.  But that doesn't mean mommy and daddy should cave.  Frugal parents means the kid won't get shellacked supporting them in retirement and there will likely be a fat inheritance.  And if nothing else there's no time like the present to work that emotional constitution bucking peer pressure.  That can pay its own dividends.
NOTHING these days is even remotely close to a cell phone in terms of teen-status.  I've even known kids to carry around a non-functional phone (i.e., service turned off) for the look of it. 

Some seem to manage their phones without trouble, but LOTS of them -- and it seems to be worse for the girls -- are genuinely addicted to them.  Some other teens, those who tend towards social awkwardness, use them as an excuse to avoid social contact.  Overall, phones are not a positive for our teens. 

Of course, I'm not phone-addicted at all.  Often I'm surprised that I'm the only person NOT staring at a phone.  For example, I had to go into the bank a few days ago, and I realized everyone else was on his or her phone.  A week ago I was in a restaurant in my daughter's college town:  I looked around and realized we were literally the only table NOT all staring down at phones.