Things you wish you knew when you were 20

[Strawberrykiwi75]

Stay away from redheads and motorcycles.

Red hair, and black leather, my favorite color scheme!  (credit to Richard Thompson, and really more descriptive of my husband than myself, but too good to pass up!)

haha!  great minds . . .  I was going to post the same lyric!  LOVE Del McCoury's version of this great Richard Thompson song.

This must be why I'm still single, my red hair scaring all the men away ;-)

[Strawberrykiwi75]

1. Give the same respect to people (no matter who they are) that they show you, and vice versa (this saved me some total dud relationships)
2. Spend time with the parent/s you're closest with, they won't be around for ever.
3. Walk away from relationships that drag you down (even if its your family).
4. Pay yourself first, even if its only a little bit at first.
5. Have fun- go to that party and let loose when you feel like it. Have that bowl of ice cream because you had a good/bad day. Laugh with your friends. Travel everywhere you get the chance. Don't be shy around people you're attracted to. Stay up all night watching the stars. Kiss that boy you thought you'd never have a chance with. Go to festivals. Try new things even if they're scary. Take a leap of faith.
6. Find things you're interested in and then go and actually do them!
7. Value the truly great people in life.
8. Learn to look after yourself.
9. If you don't like university, quit. You can always go back.
10. If you don't like your job, stay long enough to get a reference before you leave.
11. Apply for random jobs you think sound interesting even if you don't have the pre-requisites, they may just end up being your dream job!
12. Learn at least one other language.
13. Learn how to dance properly, not just a drunken stumble (and no, just because you're drunk doesn't mean you can suddenly dance well).
14. Don't be afraid to do something just because someone else told you it wasn't going to work.
15. Be frugal but not cheap.

[golfer44]

Max out that Roth, baby. And don't be afraid to the point of paralysis of making a mistake.

[greaper007]

I wish I would have known where the G-spot was.  I didn't learn that until like 21.

[luigi49]

I wish I would have known where the G-spot was.  I didn't learn that until like 21.

Where is it?  I am still searching.

[aetherie]

This thread is awesome.

Although 20 was not long ago at all for me, I would offer myself this advice:

You don't need to stay with your boyfriend just because you've been together since age 16. You can both see that the relationship is going nowhere fast, so get out. Now.

[Sunshine23]

I wish I had read these books when I was 20 (in order)

Your Money or Your Life by Joe Dominguez, Vicki Robin
The Millionaire Next Door by Thomas J. Stanley, William Danko
A Random Walk Down Wall Street by Burton G. Malkiel

I think YMOYL might have appealed to me as a 20 year old but the Millionaire Next Door would have probably made me angry and not helped. We're still growing up at that age.

This is so true. When I was 20, (am only 22 now) a friend of mine borrowed me the book Millionaire Next Door. I read about half of it, and would always cry my eyes out after reading because I felt like I'd already messed up my whole life. Now after reading MMM and all of your inspiring posts, I feel like I can get on track to financial freedom within 10-15 years.

Thanks to everyone who has posted their advice for us young Mustachians. :)

...I guess I should still read the book Your Money or Your Life, what do you all think?

[ch12]

I wish I had read these books when I was 20 (in order)

Your Money or Your Life by Joe Dominguez, Vicki Robin
The Millionaire Next Door by Thomas J. Stanley, William Danko
A Random Walk Down Wall Street by Burton G. Malkiel

I think YMOYL might have appealed to me as a 20 year old but the Millionaire Next Door would have probably made me angry and not helped. We're still growing up at that age.

This is so true. When I was 20, (am only 22 now) a friend of mine borrowed me the book Millionaire Next Door. I read about half of it, and would always cry my eyes out after reading because I felt like I'd already messed up my whole life. Now after reading MMM and all of your inspiring posts, I feel like I can get on track to financial freedom within 10-15 years.

Thanks to everyone who has posted their advice for us young Mustachians. :)

...I guess I should still read the book Your Money or Your Life, what do you all think?

Also 22

YMOYL was pretty much like: you have nothing to show for all the years you've worked (go to ssa.gov, look at your lifetime earnings, and cry). Figure out how to live like a Mustachian, focus on the things you value, and free yourself from wage slavery.

So while it was worth some time, it's not going to be substantially different or better than Mr. Money Mustache.

[Sunshine23]

Also 22

YMOYL was pretty much like: you have nothing to show for all the years you've worked (go to ssa.gov, look at your lifetime earnings, and cry). Figure out how to live like a Mustachian, focus on the things you value, and free yourself from wage slavery.

So while it was worth some time, it's not going to be substantially different or better than Mr. Money Mustache.

Wow ch12... Thank you! I haven't cried over it yet because I'm feeling positive about this, but my ssa.gov shows I have already made $167,754 in just 7 short years. Most of it in the last 3.5, but I have spent it all (and more). I knew I had made over $100,000 already, as I posted in my intro post, but that is just crazy. At least now I know what to do to change my ways, and I can make the same amount in the next 3 years or less. Plus I will be saving A LOT more of it!

I think I will still read the book someday. When I get it from the library :)

[Gerard]

A thing I wish I'd known at twenty: Don't get your food advice from the same people as your music advice.

[Katielady]

What I wish I knew: If you don't like your career trajectory, change it before you get good at it. I've only been working for five years, but it is already hard for me to leave my career because I don't want to start over on the bottom of the pay scale. Also, I wish I knew that people a lot stupider than me are doing much cooler things than me. I shouldn't have let desire for money hold me back so soon in life.

[arebelspy]

What I wish I knew: If you don't like your career trajectory, change it before you get good at it. I've only been working for five years, but it is already hard for me to leave my career because I don't want to start over on the bottom of the pay scale. Also, I wish I knew that people a lot stupider than me are doing much cooler things than me. I shouldn't have let desire for money hold me back so soon in life.

And in five years you'll be posting in the "what you wish you knew when you were 30" thread that you wish you would have known that you can change your career path at only five years in, but at at ten it's definitely too late.. ;)

[apoclater]

What I wish I knew: If you don't like your career trajectory, change it before you get good at it. I've only been working for five years, but it is already hard for me to leave my career because I don't want to start over on the bottom of the pay scale. Also, I wish I knew that people a lot stupider than me are doing much cooler things than me. I shouldn't have let desire for money hold me back so soon in life.

Can you elaborate a bit?  This seriously resonated with me since I'm 3 years into an IT career and considering changing it.  I guess I'm most interested in what people stupider than you are doing--and if what they're doing is making more money or if it's less money but cooler.

[CheckEngineLight]

A lot of good advice here, but I will say one thing about *saving* when young.

I grew up in a fairly *poor* environment, my parents immigrated to North America from a pretty shitty place to give me a better life.  They both worked numerous jobs, etc so I didn't grow up with luxuries, had to pay for my own school, worked since I was 13, etc.  Why is this relevant? 

Depending on your skill set and what you think your earning power will be, I wouldn't advise saving 50% or whatever the norm is here when you aren't making much money especially right out of school.  You need to live life within reason, and on a smaller salary after 50% is saved, you simply don't have much in terms of options.  I am not saying for you to go to Europe on a 10k vacation because everyone else is doing it or to buy a brand new car on a 40k/year annual salary for a fresh college grad, but within reason you need to do things, enjoy life, experience things, etc. You will not necessarily get that chance later on in life and it's just not the same when you are older.

The key is watch for lifestyle inflation.  If you can be happy on that 40k with a little bit saved up then you are golden because once you get to 60k/year, it's all gravy, and at 80k that's even more, and so on.  Personally in my early/mid 20's I made 45k/year and worked ridiculous hours.  Saving was practically impossible after paying bills, living on my own in a high COLA city.  I wanted to save, but it was difficult unless I wanted no social life/hobbies.  Since then I've tripled my income (30 years old now) and saving is a lot easier mostly because of how much I make, but most importantly for not falling into the lifestyle inflation trap.  Right now I could save 50% and still have plenty left over, other times I will save 80%, it depends, the point is there is flexibility.  To save on a low salary at the expense of living like a hermit in your 20's (some of your best years) I simply don't think it's worth it. 

Don't stress if you aren't hitting insane savings rates at that age, be warned, when you and your buddies get that promotion to 75k, they will all ditch the civics for entry level BMWs and maybe a small condo, at 100k they will want a bigger home and the SUV to boot, it's a never ending cycle and most people fall into that trap.  Not having much to your name at 40k in your 20's is no big deal, not having anything to your name 5+ years after school at double that salary then you know you are doing something wrong.

[ch12]

What I wish I knew: If you don't like your career trajectory, change it before you get good at it. I've only been working for five years, but it is already hard for me to leave my career because I don't want to start over on the bottom of the pay scale. Also, I wish I knew that people a lot stupider than me are doing much cooler things than me. I shouldn't have let desire for money hold me back so soon in life.

And in five years you'll be posting in the "what you wish you knew when you were 30" thread that you wish you would have known that you can change your career path at only five years in, but at at ten it's definitely too late.. ;)

Yeah. Take out the "have" in that sentence, and then you can do what arebelspy suggests.

[SomatoseVisions]

I know this is an old thread, but I'm bumping it because I find these types of discussions insightful. After reading the advice of previous posters, I have to keep reminding myself that I need to get serious about treating my body better. It's so easy to forget next to Sunday brunch and an afternoon nap.

If I had one thing to add to this thread it would be that you do not have an obligation to maintain a relationship with your family. Do what you must to honestly try to repair relationships that need it. Then, if things still aren't working, walk away knowing that you tried. Stringing along destructive relationships just because they're family will do you much more harm than good.