The waiting is the hardest part

[skarn]

After a while the numbers don't really matter. It's the kind of life you're leading that matters. So if you keep yourself occupied with meaningful things, have meaningful relationships and are healthy, it doesn't matter if you have, to paraphrase Warren Buffett, a thousand dollars in the bank or a billion dollars in the bank.

[Xtal]

If you're bored now during your time outside of work - just imagine how much more bored you'll be if you retire.

There's plenty to do now. Over at the earlyretirementextreme.com forums (and blog) there is often discussion on building a wide variety of skills. There are two benefits:
1 - reduce your expenses and provide more opportunities to make more money and
2 - it is fun and as challenging as you want it to be.

Some examples:
- Hobbies that are free, or low cost, or that make you money
- Hobbies that will reduce your expenses (getting good at cooking - being able to cook meals you enjoy with some cheap staples and whatever is currently on sale at the store)
- Skills that can help make money (Home repair is a good example - discussed often at MMM and also www.lackingambition.com/  -- don't let the name deceive you)
- Building a strong social network where you live. This can reduce your expenses (need a chainsaw for one day? Borrow one from your friend/neighbor) and be a source of enjoyment (it can be fun to go help a friend with your expertise or time)

I didn't mean to imply I was bored all the time!  Quite the contrary.  Just that the financial side of things has gotten a bit boring.  There was so much to learn and do at first, and that has really tapered off, and now all I can do is keep living my life... and wait.

I keep myself plenty busy outside of work -- that's why I want to retire!  I play viola in a local all-volunteer orchestra (a good one!) and I knit, and I read. 

Things I'd like to delve into more are building up social relationships, and gardening, specifically permaculture gardening.  But there's only so much time out of work!

[OceanCid]

Sorry to bump this up again.
I try to counter the impatience for achieving FI as soon as possible with thinking about getting old. When I'm thinking "damn, how fast years fly by" - I add: "good, that means the years left until FI will pass by quickly too." And when I feel like "this is going to slowly, I wish I was FI already", I am grateful for being young & healthy, and don't really wish I could rush the process.
It works pretty good for me. This way I don't feel impatient or scared of the future anymore. These emotions counter each-other out.

I apply a similar emotional strategy to counter the stock market volatility too. If they are growing I think "look I'm getting richer". If they are falling "good, this month I'll buy more stock because it's cheaper". So I don't really care anymore. It allows me to be detached from it all.

[Numbers Man]

What is really powerful is that you have a plan in motion. Now you can enjoy the journey.

[arebelspy]

Sorry to bump this up again.
I try to counter the impatience for achieving FI as soon as possible with thinking about getting old. When I'm thinking "damn, how fast years fly by" - I add: "good, that means the years left until FI will pass by quickly too." And when I feel like "this is going to slowly, I wish I was FI already", I am grateful for being young & healthy, and don't really wish I could rush the process.
It works pretty good for me. This way I don't feel impatient or scared of the future anymore. These emotions counter each-other out.

I apply a similar emotional strategy to counter the stock market volatility too. If they are growing I think "look I'm getting richer". If they are falling "good, this month I'll buy more stock because it's cheaper". So I don't really care anymore. It allows me to be detached from it all.

This is awesome, I love it.

[b4u2]

I hate the waiting part as well. I probably drive myself nuts getting on here multiple times a day to try and learn something. I usually end up depressed because I'm so late to this way of thinking. I read about people my age (36) who have it made already and I'm like "Hi I'm new and way behind". Sucks

[nawhite]

I'm definitely in the "check mint every other day with all things financial on autopilot" category. One thing I've found to be good for me is writing instructions for my spouse on "how" things work. Basically an "oh shit, nawhite was hit by a bus and now DW needs to take care of things herself" folder.

I'm doing everything in pencil and paper and putting it in our fireproof safe (debating putting it in a safety deposit box instead). It is definitely still a work in progress but I've broken it up into "Assets" "Debts" and "Actions".

The Assets include usernames and passwords for every website (Banks, 401ks, work life/AD&D/health insurance, IRA's) in addition to the account numbers and amounts. The debts work the same way. The "Actions" is split up into 3 parts: 1) what you need to do on an average month, 2) what will happen automatically and 3) recommendations for what to do if I die (where step one is talk to Financial Planner A who I already picked out and trust). This way the first section of the Actions part is effectively the coversheet. Remember this is the "oh shit, I just died" folder so someone needs step by step, non-emotional instructions to get through the first month without digging a credit card hole.

Putting this together (with a will) has become my next challenge and it definitely gives me something to do while I wait for the money to come it. Thoughts?

[b4u2]

NAwhite that is awesome! I need to do that because my DW has no clue what I do.

[nawhite]

NAwhite that is awesome! I need to do that because my DW has no clue what I do.

Thanks! Forgot that I need to list all monthly bills in the debts category. Especially since those are all of the things that really need to be done on a monthly basis, they are probably just as important as the mortgage and student loans.

[hybrid]

Sorry to bump this up again.
I try to counter the impatience for achieving FI as soon as possible with thinking about getting old. When I'm thinking "damn, how fast years fly by" - I add: "good, that means the years left until FI will pass by quickly too." And when I feel like "this is going to slowly, I wish I was FI already", I am grateful for being young & healthy, and don't really wish I could rush the process.
It works pretty good for me. This way I don't feel impatient or scared of the future anymore. These emotions counter each-other out.

I apply a similar emotional strategy to counter the stock market volatility too. If they are growing I think "look I'm getting richer". If they are falling "good, this month I'll buy more stock because it's cheaper". So I don't really care anymore. It allows me to be detached from it all.

This is awesome, I love it.

Indeed.  My goal is to retire at 60, which is 12 years and change from now.  Maybe it will be 57 and maybe 63, but it's a ways out all the same.  If I tell myself I can't wait until I retire that's just another way of saying I can't wait until I turn 60.  I'm in no hurry for that, it will get here soon enough without wishing for it.

I update my spreadsheet at the end of each month and don't pay any attention to it in between.  Since I have my spending under control I really don't need to, the biggest variables are market performance and unexpected expenses.

For the younger crowd I highly recommend using that youthful exhuberance to simply go out and enjoy life.  The spreadsheet is going to happen regardless.  And if you find that to be difficult when its quiet, well, play Duolingo instead and learn another language to help pass the time.
 

[soccerluvof4]

I'm glad i am not the only one that is suffering from OCD on this topic! but its a good one to have! haha

[WageSlave]

For those familiar with Role Playing Games, I liken the wait to grinding.  I have little time for video games these days, but when I played more when I was younger, I always felt compelled to grind.  Why, I can't say, but I know I sunk a lot of time into it!  (Although the best was if you could exploit a glitch or oversight in the game's design and "auto grind" while you slept at night.)

[Bigote]

I've been tracking my investments in a spreadsheet for over a dozen years.   Occasionally I find myself doing it too often, and I realize that's the modern equivalent of Ebenezer Scrooge counting his money.    That mental image helps me close the spreadsheet. 

[zachd]

I'm definitely in the "check mint every other day with all things financial on autopilot" category. One thing I've found to be good for me is writing instructions for my spouse on "how" things work. Basically an "oh shit, nawhite was hit by a bus and now DW needs to take care of things herself" folder.

Putting this together (with a will) has become my next challenge and it definitely gives me something to do while I wait for the money to come it. Thoughts?

That's a great idea.  I have all acount credentials in a program called KEYPASS.  It's free and small and simple to use.  I keep it and it's database on a usb memory stick since that way it's both secure (if you hide it) and also if your computer goes down you don't lose everything.

But what you said would make a lot of sense.. my wife does have concerns if something happened to me how to get to all these accounts (I have at least 50 different logins stored.. not all financial).  I probably should make a backup every month or so and put it on a second memory stick and put that in our safety deposit box W instructions on how to use it if she forgot.  Or maybe just having 2 at the house is fine.. the chances of me dieing plus the house burning down simultaneously are slim.. if it did happen she would probably be in it with me and it wouldn't be too much of a concern then :)

Also the person who mentioned volunteering at Habitat.. that is a great idea.  It would be great to learn how to build houses and at the same time help people out.  I'm going to seriously consider that.

I agree with this whole thread.. I just came to the web site a few weeks ago.  Previously we also made a budget according to Dave Ramsey FPU.  Already put the brakes on a lot of spending and cut a lot of our bills down to size.  But looking at the spreadsheets and such seem to make it seem like a long time.

10 years is a long time especially if you have a number plugged in from your high paying but sucky job.

I can tell you from experience if you are in a job you love aka your dream job, the days, weeks, months, and years will fly by.

Had I been saving more spending less I probably could have still been doing the dream job.  Maybe a few more years I can get back to it.

Maybe that is something that would help to think about..  it might not have to be 10 years of hard work at a corp job to retire early... maybe you do 2 years of hard work, then 2 years of a more fun but still corp job, etc... taper off the work over time.. maybe it takes a little longer to retire.. but maybe you don't care if you are doing something you love.

That was sort of an 'issue' for me with this blog.. I love the information but ther was never an article about 'how I suffered through 10 years of working to retire early'.  I mean, that is what it's about, but saving money and all is actually fun and not that big of a deal.

 Showing up to work every day and dealing with the bullsht of a difficult job is the hard part!  There's really not much help for that though.. other than find a better job.. 'make the best of it' etc.

That's what makes the wait seem long it's the logic that higher pay/more work = faster retirement.. but the more you work, the more you want to retire! 

[brooklynguy]

That was sort of an 'issue' for me with this blog.. I love the information but ther was never an article about 'how I suffered through 10 years of working to retire early'.  I mean, that is what it's about, but saving money and all is actually fun and not that big of a deal.

 Showing up to work every day and dealing with the bullsht of a difficult job is the hard part!  There's really not much help for that though.. other than find a better job.. 'make the best of it' etc.

That's what makes the wait seem long it's the logic that higher pay/more work = faster retirement.. but the more you work, the more you want to retire!

Actually this post sort of addresses that issue and offers some advice at the end on how to deal with it:

http://www.mrmoneymustache.com/2011/12/14/are-you-obsessed-with-early-retirement/

[thelamb]

xtal, your situation sounds exactly like mine:  massive turnaround in lifestyle, financially feeling good and stress free, making full 401k contribution, hacking away at the debt (~ 9 months to go when I originally assumed it would take 4-5 years).  Looking at all the other posters, we're clearly not alone. 

I like to think the reason I check my ish so often is to see if I'm missing something that can be thrown at the debt.  I'm hoping once that milestone is achieved and I've given the auto-save a couple months, I'll chill the F out. 

One silly little thing I've started doing is got a little notebook and dedicated a page to each thing I'd like to achieve this year.  Each week I update if any progress was made on each sheet.  There's little pressure but the constant reminder is motivating.  I add a new sheet if something comes to mind.  There are about 15 in the works, 2 are financial, and the rest are all over the map from health, to house projects, to completing a certain # of paintings, to even a sheet of things I want to buy, which is right after the sheet of things I want to sell (the latter must be achieved to reward with the former).  Anyway, it's fun and has helped to start shifting my mind off of the FI thinking all the time. 

[HappierAtHome]

Two things that help me:

Putting more effort in at work (often I find that the harder I try to be truly excellent at my job, the more satisfaction I get from it).

Picking another area of my life to focus on for a while - for example, improving fitness, or seeing friends more often.

[arebelspy]

I had an recent realization which made me wish FI wasn't coming so quickly, but would take a little longer.

Funny how things you don't expect can turn your perspective upside down.

[meadow lark]

Changing from working full-time to part-time has completely changed my attitude.  When I was full-time I was miserable, and our planned 4.3 years was killing me!  Now - no biggie!  I am semi-retired, and in 4.3 years hope to go even more semi!  But life is good today, and the only reason I am eager for FI is so we can travel a lot more, but I can't do that now even if I had the money.  My 18 yo is not ready for us not to be here, miss my dogs too much, etc.  But in 4.3 years he will be 23, and unfortunately will probably have fewer dogs, so that doesn't worry me so much.  And if my dogs are still doing well, maybe we will full-time in an RV for a couple years instead of going to Asia first!

[dude]

Yeah, I find myself not wanting to wish away time -- because it's going by fast enough (too fast) -- but really, really wanting to be done with this job (it's a pensioned position for which I have to put in another 5 years, so I'm not leaving it any time prior to that) so I can move on to the next phase of my life.  Check accounts every day just for the hell of it, but I don't let market events/fluctutations/news persuade me to make any changes -- just riding it steadily.

[b4u2]

I just started digging out of debt so my road (time) is very long. Not much to check with my accounts lol. Luckily I did start my 401k early but it's not enough (6% and 125k after 15 years). I like to think about investments but know I need to kill this debt first.

[iwasjustwondering]

I know the feeling!  I woke up at 3:00 in the morning on bonus day in January.  I got up, checked my account online to see that the money was there, and paid off my $7,000 car loan.  It was such a good feeling.  Getting the title in the mail was a good feeling.  Dirty secret: I sometimes go to the former car loan holder's site to see the loan, still listed there as "paid off."  :)

[ThatsMyOtter]

I'm definitely in the "check mint every other day with all things financial on autopilot" category. One thing I've found to be good for me is writing instructions for my spouse on "how" things work. Basically an "oh shit, nawhite was hit by a bus and now DW needs to take care of things herself" folder.

I'm doing everything in pencil and paper and putting it in our fireproof safe (debating putting it in a safety deposit box instead). It is definitely still a work in progress but I've broken it up into "Assets" "Debts" and "Actions".

The Assets include usernames and passwords for every website (Banks, 401ks, work life/AD&D/health insurance, IRA's) in addition to the account numbers and amounts. The debts work the same way. The "Actions" is split up into 3 parts: 1) what you need to do on an average month, 2) what will happen automatically and 3) recommendations for what to do if I die (where step one is talk to Financial Planner A who I already picked out and trust). This way the first section of the Actions part is effectively the coversheet. Remember this is the "oh shit, I just died" folder so someone needs step by step, non-emotional instructions to get through the first month without digging a credit card hole.

Putting this together (with a will) has become my next challenge and it definitely gives me something to do while I wait for the money to come it. Thoughts?

Great idea! A quick google search suggests safety deposit boxes can run $30 to $75 a year. Maybe add how to get out of paying for the box (or how to renew if you think she'd want to keep using it after your untimely demise).

I'd add a letter that has nothing to do with finances. Maybe some favorite memories, how much she means to you, etc. Maybe include some pictures or other keepsakes too.  I know my husband would be mad (though probably not too surprised) if my last message to him was about 401ks and bills.

ETA: Consider adding instructions for your funeral--whether/where you want one, names and contact information for people who should be notified, etc. You can also preplan and prepay for a funeral if you think she'd be too overwhelmed to handle arrangements herself.

[arebelspy]

I had an recent realization which made me wish FI wasn't coming so quickly, but would take a little longer.

Funny how things you don't expect can turn your perspective upside down.

Do you mind sharing the realization?

It was nothing profound, it just hit me during a moment of observation that I'm going to be FI much too soon, and miss what I have now.  There was more to it, but it's hard to put into words.  Sorry I can't do better than that.  :)

[CommonCents]

I'm definitely in the "check mint every other day with all things financial on autopilot" category. One thing I've found to be good for me is writing instructions for my spouse on "how" things work. Basically an "oh shit, nawhite was hit by a bus and now DW needs to take care of things herself" folder.

I'm doing everything in pencil and paper and putting it in our fireproof safe (debating putting it in a safety deposit box instead). It is definitely still a work in progress but I've broken it up into "Assets" "Debts" and "Actions".

The Assets include usernames and passwords for every website (Banks, 401ks, work life/AD&D/health insurance, IRA's) in addition to the account numbers and amounts. The debts work the same way. The "Actions" is split up into 3 parts: 1) what you need to do on an average month, 2) what will happen automatically and 3) recommendations for what to do if I die (where step one is talk to Financial Planner A who I already picked out and trust). This way the first section of the Actions part is effectively the coversheet. Remember this is the "oh shit, I just died" folder so someone needs step by step, non-emotional instructions to get through the first month without digging a credit card hole.

Putting this together (with a will) has become my next challenge and it definitely gives me something to do while I wait for the money to come it. Thoughts?

Great idea! A quick google search suggests safety deposit boxes can run $30 to $75 a year. Maybe add how to get out of paying for the box (or how to renew if you think she'd want to keep using it after your untimely demise).

I'd add a letter that has nothing to do with finances. Maybe some favorite memories, how much she means to you, etc. Maybe include some pictures or other keepsakes too.  I know my husband would be mad (though probably not too surprised) if my last message to him was about 401ks and bills.

ETA: Consider adding instructions for your funeral--whether/where you want one, names and contact information for people who should be notified, etc. You can also preplan and prepay for a funeral if you think she'd be too overwhelmed to handle arrangements herself.

Yep, my parents have a "red folder" they created that tells us where to find everything we need if they die.  I believe it includes directions to their lawyer who did their will (though they keep trying to point him out when we drive past, so I might vaguely remember), and info on bank accounts etc.  No pw though because it's in the house.  My sister is listed as someone who can access their safety deposit box, which is where their copy of the will is kept (so we don't need to bring a death certificate to get to it).

Letter is good.

Also health care proxy/instructions etc.

I keep meaning to do this myself.

[arebelspy]

It was nothing profound, it just hit me during a moment of observation that I'm going to be FI much too soon, and miss what I have now.  There was more to it, but it's hard to put into words.  Sorry I can't do better than that.  :)

You are already aware that you can continue to do what you're doing now, and that being FI is having the freedom and option to do what you want.

I only know to assume that you feel you'll be giving up the sense of having this big goal and the excitement of being on this journey.

Right, but things will change at that point.  Sure, I could keep doing what I'm doing, but I won't - and I won't want to.  But at this point, I still want this, and want to enjoy it now while I can, without FI and those changes rushing up.  :)