Thanks everyone for sharing! My experiences mirror some of those shared by other posters: parents grew up poor but managed to attain middle class status (mom through putting herself through college and earning her CPA license, dad by working as a technician) and eventually moved out to the burbs. As a result, I was able to grow up in a middle class suburb with a SAHM (mom decided to quit her full time when my sister was born, and continued to do accounting work out of our home), and experienced things like Disney world, summer camps, reading time at the library, etc. My upbringing exposed me to opportunities that shaped my ambitions, and ultimate pursuit of higher education and many of the goals that I am working towards now, and for that I am grateful. It wasn't until adulthood, however, that I began to understand the reality of my parent's financial situation. While they had attained aspects of the 'American Dream' in terms of a house, jobs, vacations, etc., what they had not built was a financial legacy that could be passed down and that would serve as a platform for building generational wealth. I did not know, at the time, that vacations were financed by credit cards, or that they did not own their home. I think a large part of this stemmed from my dad, the primary bread winner, who believed that he was entitled to things now as an adult that he was denied as a child due to his parent's economic status. I remember vividly as a senior in high school asking my mom about money that they had for me to go to college, and was surprised when she told me that there was none. I naively thought that all parents had money set aside for their children's education (because this is what TV taught me), but quickly learned that this was not the case. Thankfully, I was a smart kid and was able to receive scholarships to help fund my education, but that conversation was the start of my desire to better understand the world of personal finances. I have made my fair share of mistakes (credit cards in college being one of them...smh), but am now focused on financial independence (to the point of being a tad extreme) and being able to contribute to wealth building for future generations. For example, I don't have any children but have 6 nieces and nephews and plan to stash money aside for them that they will have access to upon adulthood to help pay for college or buy their first home. One area that has worked for me thus far in achieving this goal is investing in real estate, and while I now consider the Midwest my home I did invest in property before my move in an area that is appreciating and that provides me with rental income. One day, I hope that my entire family is in a position financially for us to invest in real estate together...but until that day happens, I'm fine with being the trailblazer that can show them it is possible :)
I will admit that it has been challenging to build my knowledge in this area, as conversations about money were not commonplace in my home. Much of the knowledge that I gained was through trial and error, and eventually I learned what works for me and the goals that I have. It has also been difficult to identify a community of people who share my financial goals, and from who I can gain support. Despite my income level (and the fact that I strongly believe in having multiple streams of income, and have engaged in side hustles for years now), I'm ok with doing things that may make me appear to be "poor" - like buying a beater (but perfectly fine mechanically) Toyota Tercel stick shift that I taught myself to drive with the intent to sell my gas guzzling SUV (I totaled that car, but so miss those less than $30 fillups at the gas tank...). Also, when I bought my first home I took on housemates as extra income as I did not need three bedrooms and was willing to sacrifice privacy for the sake of my financial bottom line. This home is currently fully rented, and I now have been blessed with a higher income position in a laid back office setting where dressing up is not the norm - thus I don't need to spend a bunch of money on fancy clothes, nor would they care if they saw me driving another beater ;) I've also opted to have housemates again and drastically live under budget until I'm ready to buy another home - preferably in cash, at which point I plan on taking on another housemate. All of these lessons I've had to learn through my own experiences, as I don't yet have anyone in my life (outside of the fabulous people I read about online) who is willing to live the lifestyle that I choose to
I agree that education is a big part of the solution to closing the racial wealth gap, both in the traditional academic sense and when it comes to finances specifically. That and a willingness to go against the grain, which can be hard for groups that typically identify as communal to do. I admit that it can be socially isolating as a mustachian of color, but I take it in stride, as the sacrifice is so totally worth it. (Like...who can I geek out to when I purchase a perfectly fine used printer from craigslist for $10 instead of paying $50 at Target for a new one...) I also want my life to serve as motivation to others that they too can do it. I don't have a trust fund, didn't make that much at first (...though that's starting to change...), but was willing to work my buns off to free myself from the bondage of debt and it worked! Some people may have never met someone who is completely debt free, and may resign themselves to think that we all have to live with some level of debt. I want to be the example that this does not have to be, but this starts with me and the decisions that I choose to make.
I also think that a distinction needs to be made about being rich vs wealthy, and perhaps this is a topic for another thread but I feel like less in known about truly gaining wealth as opposed to acquiring riches...*begins to stroke invisible pondering beard*
Let's keep this convo going!