First, I remember your first thread from some time ago, and I still hear many of the same underlying issues: Excuses. Mainly, an unwillingness to make changes, even when those changes would be solidly in your best interest. Is it really unwillingness? Or is it indecisiveness? I don't know, but I suggest that you make a goal to change ONE THING per week, or one thing every two weeks ... really, how many weeks have gone by while you've done nothing? This is totally do-able, but you've gotta take steps in the right direction.
Thoughts:
- I understand the T-Mobile's no good here thing. We have that same situation, and that's why we're with Verizon ... but the difference is that we can afford it. Your real choices are: 1) Stay with Verizon and sink deeper into debt every month, or 2) Go with a sub-standard carrier, and it's one step towards working your way back to financial stability.
- Your wife needs to get a job either as a school lunch lady OR a school bus driver. Why? Did you say she's earning about 22K/year? I just looked it up, and -- if the internet's telling the truth -- a lunch lady makes about 20K/year and a bus driver makes more like 26/year. BUT ... that's for 10 months of work, and she'd be included in the state pension program. I think your youngest is starting school soon, right? So a job with the school system would mean she'd be off when they're off ... big savings in terms of money AND in terms of shuttling here and there /finding day care. I know, you said grandma is helping now, but you can't assume that'll continue indefinitely. This money, summers off, and being in the pension program would be a step up for your wife.
- I doubt your record keeping. How could you possibly use 5 gallons of laundry detergent in three months? I make about one gallon, and it lasts me six months. Having said that, I do agree with the poster who says it's premature optimization. How much were you spending on laundry detergent? $10/month, maybe? If so, then the maximum you could save by making laundry detergent is $10/month ... look at your biggest issues first. Perhaps that's eating out -- the crock pot meals are a great idea for that. Another good idea is deli meals from the grocery store (not as cheap as homemade, but also no drinks and tip to pay). Take care of the big stuff first, then get down to the nitty-gritty stuff like laundry detergent.
- Get rid of the credit cards. I know, you say you "need" to keep them in case of an emergency -- but you're IN an emergency! You need to develop the skill of resourcefulness. What's the worst thing that could happen if you had no access to those cards? The reality is that you're too quick to go to money to get yourself out of trouble. I know you say your wife doesn't spend much on herself -- just on the kids, but realistically, do the kids really NEED much? Probably not, but if you have credit cards for "emergencies", you'll find things they need.
- Serious question: Do you know your Meyers Briggs type? I think it's quite different from most people's here, and if we knew yours, perhaps we could help more efficiently. I know that one of my children has a personality type very different from mine, and when I read up on "how she thinks", it helped me understand her thought processes ... it really helped.
