Looking for stress advice on behalf of my husband. He is feeling defeated and like life is one big miserable slog. I have suggested getting some daily exercise or at least a few times a week, taking time to read or play video games to relax, and trying to talk to people in addition to me (friends, family, counseling, anyone). He does eat well because I make all the meals, pack lunch, etc. I already do all the cooking, cleaning and childcare so there isn’t really anything I can offload from him.
We can’t really address the root cause right now (work) - without going into an abundance of detail, work is stressful (high pressure, long hours, weekend work, etc), he can’t change jobs right now (contract), but he may get reassigned on short notice (would be a big pay cut and an ego blow so he's worried). Vacation time is not an option for the next few months. Ideas?
1. Sleep
2. Exercise
I've been up and down in the last year. My workplace is very stressful. And about 9 months ago, I got "promoted" to a job that I didn't want, that was even more stressful. And I didn't know what I was doing for a LONG time. Still am learning things. That is incredibly stressful.
The two things that are essential for managing my stress (I already eat well) are sleep and exercise.
I aim to get 8 hours a night, at least. It means that I am often in bed, asleep, before the kids.
The other is exercise. I have been signing up for half marathons, races, and running programs - because these days, I find that I'm much more likely to show up if I paid for it. I'm making it a priority. It really burns off a lot of the stress. My schedule is such that I wake up at 5 am 4x a week. I run 3 days, and go to a workout class on the fourth day (to help with running). On Sundays, I meet my friend at the gym for an hour on the elliptical (gab fest) and some weight training.
On the non-alarm days, I often wake up naturally at 6 or 6:30, meaning I get 9 hours of sleep.
My husband is also super stressed at work. Very busy. About 1.5 years ago, it came to a head - and he was not getting enough sleep. He's a night owl. He likes his down time. After the kids are in bed (9 or 9:30), he likes to watch TV and chill, so often is not in bed until 11 pm or later. I just said "you need sleep". He decided to stop setting the alarm for 5:30 am to go to the gym. Well, that means he does not exercise anymore. And he hasn't for 1.5 years. I cannot make him do it. He's an adult. It's his decision. HE has to decide to go to bed earlier AND get up to work out. He doesn't. He'd rather have the down time (which I do not get, unless you count running as down time).