When you homeschool because the local system sucks, you have abdicated from the public system. You have taken caring and involved parents out of that system, and your potential contribution to the public system is lost. You aren't likely to pay attention (or at least as much attention as you would have) to school trustee elections, to school funding, to curriculum development, and this is a loss for the system and our community. Note: I feel the same way about private and separate schools and to some extent even special program schools like language schools.
Yes.
But many of us did quite a few years of that free public service before opting out. Our children deserve parents who are not only great advocates, passionate about community stuff...but also parents who are not exhausted and drained and stripped from a 13-year battle for basic services for the children (their own and others') in greatest need.
We do our service years for as long as we can -for everyone's benefit- and when we must, we move on -so that our children, too, can have happy childhoods.
Jooni, I want to respond to this in general, but I'd like to start by making clear that I agree with your last sentence above, and by saying that I'm not intending to point this response at you in any specific or particular way.
This feels to me like the private school "debate": there are a very few kids with needs that absolutely can't be met in the public school system, and who have "legitimate" (in my eyes, which is a wholenotherballofwax) reasons to be going to private school. Unfortunately, the number of parents who
think their kids are "too advanced" for the public school system is much, much higher. 95+% of the kids I've met could be served pretty well in the public system, particularly if their parents devoted a fraction of the time, energy, and $$ they're putting into private education toward helping ALL students, or at least all students with needs similar to those of their own kids.
(That's pretty abstract, so here's a concrete example: one year I went in once/week to teach a pull-out math class so my kid -- and 7 more just like him -- could do a little more interesting/accelerated math. This also served to pull 8 wiggly, bored boys out of the regular (advanced) math class once/week, so everyone else could focus a bit more easily, so win-win-win.)
And I get both sides -- we sent our older kid to the neighborhood elementary school for 3 years, (and we were heavily involved in a whole slew of things) until I sat in a planning meeting where I was told by a teacher "we have no obligation to provide a challenge to kids like yours because there are so many other students here with greater needs." At that point, I went to the Assistant Superintendent of our district (who was also at that meeting) and started the process of getting my kids transferred to another school. I realize that this worked for us because we had put in a lot of time and energy at that point, and because the district administration was fundamentally reasonable about it, and I get that there are situations where this might not work. But I think lots of people (not you specifically) don't even try.
I think my concern about homeschooling is the same as Kmp2's, with the added spice of -- yeah, a very few kids absolutely can't have their needs met in their regular school district and should be pulled out. But MOST of the kids who are pulled out could be served OK, and it would be a great societal benefit for their parents to stay engaged and try to help not just their own children, but other kids as well.
I mean, sure -- most of us in this space have kids who would be better served by having 1-on-1 learning from their very bright parents. But that creates a world full of other children who are having their needs served less well, because their parents don't have the background, or time, or education, or money that we do. My experience is that it's mostly better to leave the kids in the school system, identify problems, and then go to bat for ALL the kids to try to make things better, rather then leaving the underperforming schools for some kind of underclass. Those kids will be citizens too, in a very few years!
...child's exposure to different cultures/values etc. My favourite parenting moments (and really the best part of public school so far) as been the discussions we have when my DD comes home and says 'So and So said this about Unions, or Capitalism, or said governing party'. I love those discussions, and whole heartedly believe that we are better off talking about our differences, and that it builds stronger core values in my kids by reinforcing our family values that way.
All the homeschooling families I know IRL feel likewise :)
For that reason, they also hang out at community events, use transit, play with whomever at the park, travel with groups, attend services of a wide variety of religions and nonreligions, attend conventions for all sorts of topics, get together with extended family members whose beliefs differ, read a wide range of authors and topics, etc.
Yeah, but there are plenty of parents around the US, at least, who homeschool to control what their kids are exposed to. Mostly for religious reasons. In particular, it's used as a way to keep girls from getting exposed to "ideas"...
Jooni, I'm not pointing a finger at you specifically -- I've read enough of your wonderful writing around here to get a sense of your situation. The problem is that there are lots of folks around with kids who are bright, or slightly "non-neurotypical" or otherwise challenged by stupid policies around how schools are operated (like boys who can't sit still), and the majority of those kids could remain in the system while their parents try to reform the stupid parts. In fact, I strongly believe that a child's parent(s) are their most important advocate, so when it's abundantly clear that their needs can't/won't be met, I support looking for other avenues. I just wish those parents would understand that as long as they're engaging with the school system they're actually advocating for other kids as well as their own. (A point which I'm confident you understand, so, again -- I'm not responding to your personal decision, more to the general issues you raise.)
Note: Number of children I've met who are too smart for my local public school system = 1. (And he's a sweet young kid who is a complete genius -- my kids are fairly bright, and this 3rd grader blows them out of the water.) Number of children I've met whose parents think they should be in private school because it's more challenging = I dunno, several dozen. Number of AP classes our High School offers = 32ish, though not all every year. Number of kids taking AP Spanish this year (I asked my HS Junior yesterday) = 100-120. So there are plenty of bright kids there being challenged.