Man, pursuing a girl costs so much money

[k290]

I mean she splits the bill and all.

But the phone calls, the gas.

That feel when 45% savings rate instead of 50%.

I cry everytime.

[Gone Fishing]

Gas and phone bills don't sound that bad.  Theoretically, they should go away in the event you decide to make things more permanent.  It's expensive dinners out, expensive gifts, expensive travel, etc, you need to worry about.  Find a girl who doesn't care about such things and you are on the right track.   

[zephyr911]

That feel when 45% savings rate instead of 50%.

I KNOW THAT FEEL BRO. *hugs*

[nereo]

phone?  gas?  is this a long distance relationship?

sorry to hear about the outlay of cash.  I've certainly been there myself - the silver lining of course is the potential for a lifetime of happiness and reduced expenses if the relationship becomes permanent.

[I'm a red panda]

What are you doing that individual phone calls cost money? Perhaps you don't live in the US and that's why I don't understand...

Why not split the driving if you are currently doing all of it?

[Can't Wait]

I mean she splits the bill and all.

Just bring a bag lunch/dinner to your dates so that you won't have to pay!

But the phone calls, the gas.

Stop talking on the phone and only text her. Ride your bike to go see her or tell her your car broke down so that she drives to you.

[runningthroughFIRE]

I mean she splits the bill and all.

Just bring a bag lunch/dinner to your dates so that you won't have to pay!

But the phone calls, the gas.

Stop talking on the phone and only text her. Ride your bike to go see her or tell her your car broke down so that she drives to you.

This sounds like bordering on cheap rather than frugal.  Make your date a picnic, or cook *for* her.  +1 on riding your bike, but don't lie about your car being broken down.

If it's long distance, I know the feel.

[okonomiyaki]

Skype? Whatsapp? Google hangouts/voice? Free unlimited calls for both you AND her, if both of you have internet....

Can't say much about the gas except maybe meet in the middle, and try to spend a longer time together when you are ...

[Bajadoc]

Depends how hot she is.

[use2betrix]

Cook for her instead of taking her out. Way cheaper, and if you can't cook, you need to learn. On new dates, it's always beneficial because they're already at your house so there's a better chance you're getting laid lol.

[mozar]

Basically, if you don't think she's worth it, maybe you should move on to someone else.

[zephyr911]

[okits]

Basically, if you don't think she's worth it, maybe you should move on to someone else.

Or, if you don't think dating is worth the cost and bother, stop dating.  If you'd rather have the money that speaks to the (low) level of engagement you're feeling with the relationship.  The beginning should be fireworks and stupid grins.  If you're not feeling it, this is a waste of both people's time.

[MrsPete]

If you resent the money you're spending, she's not the one. 

[partgypsy]

Can't tell if she's not the one for you or you are becoming a tightwad (aka someone who knows the price of everything but the value of nothing).

[2lazy2retire]

Your way ahead of most - compare these costs to coughing up 60% of your assets a few years down the road - ride free my friend;)

[sam]

If you resent the money you're spending, she's not the one.

Very true, surely it will get cheaper once you become 'official'!?

Sam

[FI40]

Are you guys really taking OP seriously?

[zephyr911]

Are you guys really taking OP seriously?

INORITE

[Bob W]

You not doing it right.  A true mustachian has 3 girls chasing them and paying all the costs. 

[Left]

Wait until the kids hit...

[Mr Dorothy Dollar]

Guys are easier and cheaper. Homo for the win!

[zephyr911]

Guys are easier and cheaper. Homo for the win!

My wife pays our mortgage. *drops mic*

[PencilThinStash]

You not doing it right.  A true mustachian has 3 girls chasing them and paying all the costs.

TEACH ME YOUR WAYS, OH WISE ONE

[lizzzi]

I guess there are a few inevitable costs to establishing a new relationship. But you don't have to go crazy, and neither does she. Don't forget, she may be spending on some new clothes or make-up--possibly an extra salon visit or two...when I first started to see my future husband, before the fireworks even started, I went down to Victoria's Secret and purchased all new lingerie. But if you end up with your true love...that is priceless. Worth every cent. And then some.

[Bob W]

You not doing it right.  A true mustachian has 3 girls chasing them and paying all the costs.

TEACH ME YOUR WAYS, OH WISE ONE

Forget the wallet on the first date -- "whoops."  Be sure to order lots of martinis.  Since the girl paid she will expect something in return.  It is then that you give the incredible digital orgasms that keep them calling.   So easy a child could do it.   Rinse and repeat.

[okits]

Guys are easier and cheaper. Homo for the win!

Best response ever. Honest, practical, easily implemented.

Also, cost of accidental children is exactly $0.

[zephyr911]

Forget the wallet on the first date -- "whoops."  Be sure to order lots of martinis.  Since the girl paid she will expect something in return.  It is then that you give the incredible digital orgasms that keep them calling.   So easy a child could do it.   Rinse and repeat.

Hahahaha... sick motherfucker. If only I'd learned this 20 years ago.

[Reynolds531]

Just remember, the girl may get tired of you and take half your money. But your money will never get tired of you and take half your girl.

[k290]

lol @ the one or two people in this thread who got slightly irate.

As for those who get that its a bit tongue in cheek, you brought the lolz. Nevertheless, as usual on MMM there was some good advice that I can apply. Thanks guys!

Since someone asked, South African phone calls are the most expensive in the world (fact).

[albijaji]

Wait until the kids hit...

that was exactly what I was thinking.. you have no clue yet!! once you have a 14 year old (and some other munchkins if you choose to) you
long for the days where you go out and split a bill and then call it a day,(and yes I am a woman and I am all for splitting bills) at least I was never whining when having lunch with my SO about
how the new hyperdunk shoes are so rad ,(whatever the f.. that is lol) and the latest IPhone came out and all my friends blablabla (OMG I have to share a iPhone 4 with you mom, that's just wrong) hinting that Christmas is coming AND WHY DONT YOU BUY ME THOSE THINGS??I and soandso got thisandthat etc etc etc... (he is a good kid but we live with impossible people who buy impossible shit for their offspring!)

on another note I think the OP is joking!! (at least I hope he is)!!!! if not enjoy the 2 bucks 50 you spend at chipotle or wherever people go to nowadays and be happy!!!


ETA you posted right when I wrote the post
I can feel your pain I am from Germany and for over a year we had a long distance relationship, but that was before 9/11 when you could buy a ticket for 600 bucks and call it a day... we eventually married, might be cheaper in the long run lol...

[nereo]

Since someone asked, South African phone calls are the most expensive in the world (fact).

ah... well that explains a few things: ~$4USD/gallon fuel prices and expensive cell plans in South Africa.

I hope she is worth it ;-)

[zephyr911]

As for those who get that its a bit tongue in cheek, you brought the lolz.

MMM always delivers.

[Landlord2015]

Just remember, the girl may get tired of you and take half your money. But your money will never get tired of you and take half your girl.

Even a wife can not take even 2% of your money if she is not your wife anymore IF you make a contract of that BEFORE your marry at least in Finland(Europe) law.

In the contract you can have that everything you own BEFORE you marry will still be yours and the wife will not have even 1% of that.

Very true most people make never that contract... however IF I would say get a wife that is 10+ years less old then me and I would think she also more or less marry me for the money I would make a contract.

Most people who take a wife from say Asia or Russia that it 20 years less older might be stupid if they have no such contract...

Yes true most still marry for the love... but how sure can you be when anyone can lie and some people are excellent doing lies?

Oh men also lie a lot and I don't say females lie more then men and I am sure many men also marry for the money.

[somebody8198]

Bitter old man here. Marrying for love is, in my opinion, a terrible idea. At least, the way it's usually thought of.

Love, as you are experiencing it, is a temporary emotion fueled by novelty. That is not going to last. Not at all.

What you need is another kind of love, a kind that takes over AFTER the oh-this-is-new-and-exciting love is gone. To find this kind of love, I must ask you to imagine your beloved with a terrible case of food poisoning, puking and stinking up the house, generally being miserable and pissed off and unhappy and looking awfully unattractive. Do you envision yourself weathering 48 hours of horrible food poisoning with your partner, and not only surviving, but actually LAUGHING about the experience and kind of enjoying it in a weird way because you were with this wonderful person, even though they were puking all over the place? If so, you might just have a chance.

But first, before you go that route, make sure the important deal breakers are worked out. Kids? Religion? Values? Traditions? Financials? Where do you want to live? How do you want family to be involved in your lives? Work this all out beforehand on your own before you go out looking for a mate. It will save you a loooot of time, pain, and energy. Trust me.

[okits]

Bitter old man here. Marrying for love is, in my opinion, a terrible idea. At least, the way it's usually thought of.

Love, as you are experiencing it, is a temporary emotion fueled by novelty. That is not going to last. Not at all.

What you need is another kind of love, a kind that takes over AFTER the oh-this-is-new-and-exciting love is gone. To find this kind of love, I must ask you to imagine your beloved with a terrible case of food poisoning, puking and stinking up the house, generally being miserable and pissed off and unhappy and looking awfully unattractive. Do you envision yourself weathering 48 hours of horrible food poisoning with your partner, and not only surviving, but actually LAUGHING about the experience and kind of enjoying it in a weird way because you were with this wonderful person, even though they were puking all over the place? If so, you might just have a chance.

But first, before you go that route, make sure the important deal breakers are worked out. Kids? Religion? Values? Traditions? Financials? Where do you want to live? How do you want family to be involved in your lives? Work this all out beforehand on your own before you go out looking for a mate. It will save you a loooot of time, pain, and energy. Trust me.

Dude, he thinks it costs too much to phone her.  I wouldn't worry about them getting hitched!

[somebody8198]

Bitter old man here. Marrying for love is, in my opinion, a terrible idea. At least, the way it's usually thought of.

Love, as you are experiencing it, is a temporary emotion fueled by novelty. That is not going to last. Not at all.

What you need is another kind of love, a kind that takes over AFTER the oh-this-is-new-and-exciting love is gone. To find this kind of love, I must ask you to imagine your beloved with a terrible case of food poisoning, puking and stinking up the house, generally being miserable and pissed off and unhappy and looking awfully unattractive. Do you envision yourself weathering 48 hours of horrible food poisoning with your partner, and not only surviving, but actually LAUGHING about the experience and kind of enjoying it in a weird way because you were with this wonderful person, even though they were puking all over the place? If so, you might just have a chance.

But first, before you go that route, make sure the important deal breakers are worked out. Kids? Religion? Values? Traditions? Financials? Where do you want to live? How do you want family to be involved in your lives? Work this all out beforehand on your own before you go out looking for a mate. It will save you a loooot of time, pain, and energy. Trust me.

Dude, he thinks it costs too much to phone her.  I wouldn't worry about them getting hitched!

Just general curmudgeonly advice.

[FLA]

Cook for her instead of taking her out. Way cheaper, and if you can't cook, you need to learn. On new dates, it's always beneficial because they're already at your house so there's a better chance you're getting laid lol.

but then there's having to spend all those quarters washing the sheets, man, life's a bitch!

[okits]

Bitter old man here. Marrying for love is, in my opinion, a terrible idea. At least, the way it's usually thought of.

Love, as you are experiencing it, is a temporary emotion fueled by novelty. That is not going to last. Not at all.

What you need is another kind of love, a kind that takes over AFTER the oh-this-is-new-and-exciting love is gone. To find this kind of love, I must ask you to imagine your beloved with a terrible case of food poisoning, puking and stinking up the house, generally being miserable and pissed off and unhappy and looking awfully unattractive. Do you envision yourself weathering 48 hours of horrible food poisoning with your partner, and not only surviving, but actually LAUGHING about the experience and kind of enjoying it in a weird way because you were with this wonderful person, even though they were puking all over the place? If so, you might just have a chance.

But first, before you go that route, make sure the important deal breakers are worked out. Kids? Religion? Values? Traditions? Financials? Where do you want to live? How do you want family to be involved in your lives? Work this all out beforehand on your own before you go out looking for a mate. It will save you a loooot of time, pain, and energy. Trust me.

Dude, he thinks it costs too much to phone her.  I wouldn't worry about them getting hitched!

Just general curmudgeonly advice.

I actually smiled at the curmudgeonly advice.

Our kiddo recently got the stomach flu, bounced back fast, but gave it to both DH and me.  He and I spent a weekend puking (and on the toilet) while also trying to keep an energetic toddler entertained/safely contained.  We took turns watching DD so the other could have a little peace while lying near death (it sure felt that way, anyway.)  Both very concerned for the other and willing to do more so the other could rest.  Now we laugh and face-palm about how awful that weekend was, how much worse the flu got us than our kiddo, and how we're paying a fucking fortune so DD can get all these daycare germs and bring them home to us.

I married someone I can puke with. He's a keeper. :) <3

[detroit_johnny]

The advice from deathpanels is really good, esp the deal breakers.  Only one he forgot, which I didn't know with my first wife (married 2 years), is she forgot to tell me she loved to sleep around.  Perhaps that fits into the values category he mentioned, I dunno  :-)  Thank goodness I learned sooner than later so I can still set a path to FI before most of my peers.  No kids, it helps.  Second wife, neither of us have kids, do not want them, will be FI perhaps in a few short years.  Been married to her since 2009, life is good

[Bob W]

Forget the wallet on the first date -- "whoops."  Be sure to order lots of martinis.  Since the girl paid she will expect something in return.  It is then that you give the incredible digital orgasms that keep them calling.   So easy a child could do it.   Rinse and repeat.

Hahahaha... sick motherfucker. If only I'd learned this 20 years ago.

Are you married now?  Because it works just as good with wives.  Its all in hand placement.  Practice,  practice,  practice.

[Jschange]

Guys are easier and cheaper. Homo for the win!

Boy-homos for the win!!!! Ladies are expensive. Used to be lesbian married. All the dollar bills went down the drain.

[Landlord2015]

Bitter old man here. Marrying for love is, in my opinion, a terrible idea. At least, the way it's usually thought of.

Love, as you are experiencing it, is a temporary emotion fueled by novelty. That is not going to last. Not at all.

What you need is another kind of love, a kind that takes over AFTER the oh-this-is-new-and-exciting love is gone. To find this kind of love, I must ask you to imagine your beloved with a terrible case of food poisoning, puking and stinking up the house, generally being miserable and pissed off and unhappy and looking awfully unattractive. Do you envision yourself weathering 48 hours of horrible food poisoning with your partner, and not only surviving, but actually LAUGHING about the experience and kind of enjoying it in a weird way because you were with this wonderful person, even though they were puking all over the place? If so, you might just have a chance.

But first, before you go that route, make sure the important deal breakers are worked out. Kids? Religion? Values? Traditions? Financials? Where do you want to live? How do you want family to be involved in your lives? Work this all out beforehand on your own before you go out looking for a mate. It will save you a loooot of time, pain, and energy. Trust me.

Dude, he thinks it costs too much to phone her.  I wouldn't worry about them getting hitched!

Yes but this is generally:
"
Man, pursuing a girl costs so much money
"
I did say how to NOT pay much for wife if the wife want to stop me your wife and she will not get 50% of what you have.

Ok I will answer his problem also then there is: Skype.
South African sound bad!
I did not say that before, but Africa is generally known for scammers and people who lie!

I would never want a black wife from Africa personally... and if she say she can not use Skype and you MUST send "her" much money sound to me like a lie.

Europe, America(also south America) or Asia or Russia wife is ok for me... I think personally that White and Latina and Asia are the most beautiful females for me.

Ok you might have talked to a female, but if she is really interested in you then she can use Skype. It is easy to create fake phone bills. Sounds to me that she lies.

If she agrees to Skype then do not fall for next reason why you should send her much money.

[goatmom]

There is a website called "seeking arrangements."  You can have a side hustle and some companionship at the same time.  Lol.  I guess you have to not care about dating older ladies.  Or older guys. But if money is numero uno - it might just work. 

[mozar]

black wife from Africa

Erm, who said she was black? She could be a white South African. And not all people are racist. Some people like black people. Crazy I know.../sarcasm

[okits]

Bitter old man here. Marrying for love is, in my opinion, a terrible idea. At least, the way it's usually thought of.

Love, as you are experiencing it, is a temporary emotion fueled by novelty. That is not going to last. Not at all.

What you need is another kind of love, a kind that takes over AFTER the oh-this-is-new-and-exciting love is gone. To find this kind of love, I must ask you to imagine your beloved with a terrible case of food poisoning, puking and stinking up the house, generally being miserable and pissed off and unhappy and looking awfully unattractive. Do you envision yourself weathering 48 hours of horrible food poisoning with your partner, and not only surviving, but actually LAUGHING about the experience and kind of enjoying it in a weird way because you were with this wonderful person, even though they were puking all over the place? If so, you might just have a chance.

But first, before you go that route, make sure the important deal breakers are worked out. Kids? Religion? Values? Traditions? Financials? Where do you want to live? How do you want family to be involved in your lives? Work this all out beforehand on your own before you go out looking for a mate. It will save you a loooot of time, pain, and energy. Trust me.

Dude, he thinks it costs too much to phone her.  I wouldn't worry about them getting hitched!

Yes but this is generally:
"
Man, pursuing a girl costs so much money
"
I did say how to NOT pay much for wife if the wife want to stop me your wife and she will not get 50% of what you have.

Ok I will answer his problem also then there is: Skype.
South African sound bad!
I did not say that before, but Africa is generally known for scammers and people who lie!

I would never want a black wife from Africa personally... and if she say she can not use Skype and you MUST send "her" much money sound to me like a lie.

Europe, America(also south America) or Asia or Russia wife is ok for me... I think personally that White and Latina and Asia are the most beautiful females for me.

Ok you might have talked to a female, but if she is really interested in you then she can use Skype. It is easy to create fake phone bills. Sounds to me that she lies.

If she agrees to Skype then do not fall for next reason why you should send her much money.

Good grief, the OP has spoken on the phone with and seen this woman in person (he is also in South Africa.)  The woman in question also pays half the bill for their date.  How do you conclude that she's a liar and scammer?

Your other generalizations based on country of origin and skin colour are offensive.

[Landlord2015]

Bitter old man here. Marrying for love is, in my opinion, a terrible idea. At least, the way it's usually thought of.

Love, as you are experiencing it, is a temporary emotion fueled by novelty. That is not going to last. Not at all.

What you need is another kind of love, a kind that takes over AFTER the oh-this-is-new-and-exciting love is gone. To find this kind of love, I must ask you to imagine your beloved with a terrible case of food poisoning, puking and stinking up the house, generally being miserable and pissed off and unhappy and looking awfully unattractive. Do you envision yourself weathering 48 hours of horrible food poisoning with your partner, and not only surviving, but actually LAUGHING about the experience and kind of enjoying it in a weird way because you were with this wonderful person, even though they were puking all over the place? If so, you might just have a chance.

But first, before you go that route, make sure the important deal breakers are worked out. Kids? Religion? Values? Traditions? Financials? Where do you want to live? How do you want family to be involved in your lives? Work this all out beforehand on your own before you go out looking for a mate. It will save you a loooot of time, pain, and energy. Trust me.

Dude, he thinks it costs too much to phone her.  I wouldn't worry about them getting hitched!

Yes but this is generally:
"
Man, pursuing a girl costs so much money
"
I did say how to NOT pay much for wife if the wife want to stop me your wife and she will not get 50% of what you have.

Ok I will answer his problem also then there is: Skype.
South African sound bad!
I did not say that before, but Africa is generally known for scammers and people who lie!

I would never want a black wife from Africa personally... and if she say she can not use Skype and you MUST send "her" much money sound to me like a lie.

Europe, America(also south America) or Asia or Russia wife is ok for me... I think personally that White and Latina and Asia are the most beautiful females for me.

Ok you might have talked to a female, but if she is really interested in you then she can use Skype. It is easy to create fake phone bills. Sounds to me that she lies.

If she agrees to Skype then do not fall for next reason why you should send her much money.

Good grief, the OP has spoken on the phone with and seen this woman in person (he is also in South Africa.)  The woman in question also pays half the bill for their date.  How do you conclude that she's a liar and scammer?

Your other generalizations based on country of origin and skin colour are offensive.

No apologies to what I said I meant every word I said. It is my subjective taste regarding women as a child could prefer a yellow icecream instead of red. If that makes me racist then I am hardcore racist lol. I am sure many latino prefer a latino partner and then there are those who prefer interracial partner whatever it is subjective taste.

If you see statistics where most scammers are from using dating sites are certain areas in the world that rise as major scammer areas.
Grief? I have been pestered by Africa scammer tries and it wastes my time. 

Ok so they have met in SouthAfrica and both live in SouthAfrica. Well if the phonebill is so expensive why don't then use Skype or send text messages if that is cheaper then talking.

[Landlord2015]

There is a website called "seeking arrangements."  You can have a side hustle and some companionship at the same time.  Lol.  I guess you have to not care about dating older ladies.  Or older guys. But if money is numero uno - it might just work.

Well there are reasons why this is a huge success in USA, but very low membership in Finland Europe where I live.

Prostitution is illegal in most USA states. The website is not illegal because in the form of law it is mutual consent relationship though no doubt sex is involved.

In UK there are fairly many members, but even UK seems a bit far away...

USA is one of the most expensive places to study. I am an IT engineer and I did not need not even 1 euro loan or huge savings or to work during my 4 year study time.

My country is not paradise I have done mandatory(must do!) military service since our east neighbor is Russia. I remember a class mate who had forgot the summoning service enlisting day. Finland police went to his home and brutally took him to the enlisting.

Now Russia is an important business partner to us and I have had one ex Russian girlfriend and lets not go into politics and in sport events I do like that we all participate.

My country do have poor people also, but here is the thing prostitution is legal in my country as it should be.

Taking a wife from abroad and meeting prostitutes is very possible in my country and not unusual. I do also respect prostitutes:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GurkREc-q4I
The above song is not meant as degrading quite the opposite...

Yeah so I might meet that 18-25 year old babe student, but likely arrangement is one night prostitution or one night sex despite me being older I might charm(no money unless you count dinner i.e dating etc.) her and not some long term sugar daddy relationship... or a permanent wife is more common then some sugar daddy arrangement in my country.

Having a favorite prostitute is possible in my country, but this sugar daddy seems like and odd mix of long term relationsship and semi eh paid sex.

I don't consider it  prostitution. Difference is a prostitute usually have sex with really many while the above arrangement is between 2 persons and the young student might very well have only one sugardaddy/suggarmommy.

[Khaetra]

I married someone I can puke with. He's a keeper. :) <3

Now I know how to judge all my future dates! :)

[Kaikou]

I read this as a MAN pursuing a GIRL.

Had to reread.

Why are you a MAN and she is a girl? There's a thread about the cost of being a woman on here, you should check it out.

I personally wouldn't want to date a guy who goes on the internet and complains about common life things, especially if they pertain to me.

But maybe you are just in jest.

Either way know that Women want to be valued and cherished (that doesn't necessarily mean money, but that doesn't mean what you are doing here either)