High Five or Face Punch?

[snareman1]

SO, I've made a lot of changes over the past 4 weeks since becoming a Mustachian.

I've been saving like crazy! I'm becoming an expert and keeping cash in my wallet.

Here's the rub.. I found out last minute that a band I really love was playing tonight and called to check on tickets. They said $25. I thought that was way too expensive but they are awesome and I've haven't spent any money on entertainment this month, so I justified driving 27 miles each way. I arrived at the venue ready to pay for my ticket and then came to find that parking was an additional $5. That meant, to see this band play one 45 minute set, I would pay $30 plus the 54 miles in fuel. My mind started automatically calculating 1.5 gallons of gas summing up to over $6. So $36! Then my mind said, "that's nearly HALF of my WEEKLY grocery budget!#$^&". I was going to trade 4 days of food to see a band play 45 minutes. I turned around and drove home, deciding to cut my losses and eat the $6, instead of $36.

Am I getting too crazy with saving and deserve a face-punch to cut loose a bit, or a high five for sticking to this way of being?

[Fitzy]

I say live a little.

Was there off-site parking that you could just have walked to the venue from a few blocks away?

[warfreak2]

The $6 in fuel shouldn't have entered into your decision-making once it was already a sunk cost. Otherwise, I wouldn't really call this a high five or a facepunch, so I'll just let you choose.

[BFGirl]

I think you have to find balance.  You need to be smart with your money, but still need to be able to do things that will bring you joy.  Only you can decide what that balance is.

[CarDude]

As others have noted, it's about balance. We all spend money on things that other folks here might find excessive; decide what's important to you and be intentional about it.

[NewStachian]

High Five!

Being Mustachian is about taking charge of your life. It's not about spending as little as possible. I'm a proponent of setting financial goals that are aggressive, but not "save every dime possible". Another thing that helps me out is I will commit to an event. What that means is I will estimate the cost of an event and make my decision on whether or not to go. Once I've made my decision to go, I won't let cost bother me. That doesn't mean I go to a movie and buy a million snacks and spend a ton of money, but it does mean if I show up and have to spend a little more than my budget because of an unforeseen parking cost I won't let it ruin my evening.

I've said this in other posts, but many of us are mathematical optimizers who want to extract the maximum amount of value out of something. It drives us insane when that efficiency is compromised, even by a little bit. The trick is to not let it compromise your happiness or enjoyment.

[MrFancypants]

Something that's easy to lose sight of in the midst of so many people writing off so many activities that mean little to them is that it's easy to feel judged for spending money on things you genuinely enjoy doing.  Just because one person is fine with never spending another penny on doing one activity or another doesn't mean that you need to feel the same way.

The point is to eliminate wasteful spending on things that don't enhance your life.  If you absolutely love something, do not deny yourself (assuming you can actually afford it).

Don't pinch pennies for the sake of pinching pennies, this isn't a contest.  Pinch pennies so you can redirect them towards things that bring you happiness.

[wtjbatman]

I have some great memories from going to concerts, so I consider them money well spent. I have very little memory of the thousands of dollars I used to spend on video games, some of which even went unplayed (or played for a few hours then dropped for something new). The few good memories I have are when I would play games with friends or family. In the end I could have spend considerably less money if I had just realized what was actually important to me, and what was just something I "needed" to have.

There's no mathematical formula for creating good memories out of things you love. In the end, those are the reasons we do the not-fun stuff like go to work and pay our bills.

[Unchained]

Bit of a face punch... but maybe for different reasons. The end goal for many of us is to be free from financial burdens so that we may live our life on our own terms whatever that may be. I suppose it depends on your goals and what you want. Seeing a band you love and enjoy is entirely reasonable to me and paying an amount of less than 50 dollars seems very reasonable (I know I have paid much more). The face punch is for you deciding to turn around. You had already spent the money to get there so in a way you threw away the fuel without getting anything out of it. It's still good that the money has been saved though. Admittedly, I do have the same thoughts that you do about whether or not something is worth the money spent.

[soccerluvof4]

I agree with ^ and the others that said you need to find balance. I would face punch for the money spent already as well. The MMM way isn't giving up everything and perhaps you could of cut some other expense to make up for the money you lost OR if you learned a lesson on making decisions it was money well spent. But dont get down on yourself and move on!!

[NewStachian]

Oh, I didn't read the last sentence that said you turned around. You turned around to save $36 for a band you really wanted to see? That makes zero sense to me.

[eil]

I'll offer the OP a high-five. Sticking to your guns and refusing to part with your little green employees when you realize something is going to cost way more than you thought is a sign of strength and will.

There was also a learning opportunity here: If you really want to see a band live, track their tour schedule ahead of time and wait for a good time/location to come up. If they're an established band, the stars will eventually align.

[samburger]

The goal is not to save money. The goal is to make your money match your values. Buy things that make a difference. Don't buy things out of habit, laziness, ego, etc.

If turning around kept your money close to your values, high five. If you turned around because you'll throw your values under a bus to save a nickel, face punch.

[warfreak2]

Oh, I didn't read the last sentence that said you turned around. You turned around to save $36 for a band you really wanted to see? That makes zero sense to me.

He turned around to save $30.

[skyrefuge]

Mild face punch, but for a reason I haven't seen anyone focus on yet: lack of planning!

An enormous part of being a Mustachian is looking into the future, gathering all available information, and taking it into account when making decisions.

For a $25 concert, the parking information was surely published online, so it should not have been a surprise to you. And you should have been aware of your transportation costs before you made the decision to go, not once you were already there.

Refusing to fall for bait-and-switch tactics is a good instinct to have, but this was a bait-and-switch situation only because you made it one. So, face-punch for wasting $6, a bunch of time, and warming the globe for no reason at all.

I go to lots of concerts, and finding the cheapest ways to get tickets, get there, and park are a huge part of my decision-making process. Sometimes it will be worth it to travel to the box office beforehand to avoid fees, and sometimes it's better to just pay the fees. And there are certainly times where the parking situation at a venue is the tipping point for me deciding not to go. But I make that decision before I go!

Other tricks for the Mustachian concertgoer are to not buy drinks, and to keep your ear to the underground so that you can catch the awesome upstarts in an intimate venue for $10, rather than seeing them with 2000 other people when they're fat and lazy and charging $40.

[MrFancypants]

Mild face punch, but for a reason I haven't seen anyone focus on yet: lack of planning!

^

this highlights the exact reason why my wife and I each receive allowances.  This is money that we can do whatever we want with, for any reason, any time.  I could pull it out of my account and set it on fire if that brought me joy.

That is the money we use for random things such as what the OP is talking about.  This insulates us from whatever regret we might have for splurging on something like a concert, or a movie, or whatever.  Because the second we move that allowance to our own personal account, we basically consider the money to be spent.

[snareman1]

Wow, thank you everyone for the feedback. It was very helpful to see the varying responses within the same community. This helped me to see different sides of myself.

The lessons I am choosing to take away from this experience relate to choice/decision making, planning, balance, happiness, where I place value, intentionality and allowances.

Thank you for for being awesome!

[fantabulous]

It's figuring out that happy balance for yourself that's tricky when you're new to this whole facial hair monetary metaphor thing. I focused too much on my money specificially after reading through the blog, and people I have introduced to this site have had the same experience.

Also, as a compromise: let's call your situation a "Face Five".

[avongil]

High Five. 45 min for 30$. You did the calcs, you figured it was not worth it. Good for you!  I do the same thing, if its more than I make per hour, then I really think to myself, is this really worth X times my time in entertainment?  Since your money is the time you spent at work, you must justify your fun expenses.

[danclarkie]

A band you were willing to drive 54 miles for at the drop of the hat, and you ditched the gig over a $5 parking charge?

$5 will move you 0 days closer to FI.
$5 compounding at 7.8% over 25 years in $32.69

In 25 years, you would gladly pay $35 to live an evening of being young again and attending a concert.
I guarantee it.

Yes, you are over-thinking things IMO.

[Unchained]

A band you were willing to drive 54 miles for at the drop of the hat, and you ditched the gig over a $5 parking charge?

$5 will move you 0 days closer to FI.
$5 compounding at 7.8% over 25 years in $32.69

In 25 years, you would gladly pay $35 to live an evening of being young again and attending a concert.
I guarantee it.

Yes, you are over-thinking things IMO.

To be fair I think he saved 35 dollars as it was the overall cost that made him turn around. I totally agree with your statement though. You cannot save your youth.

[limeandpepper]

A band you were willing to drive 54 miles for at the drop of the hat, and you ditched the gig over a $5 parking charge?

$5 will move you 0 days closer to FI.
$5 compounding at 7.8% over 25 years in $32.69

In 25 years, you would gladly pay $35 to live an evening of being young again and attending a concert.
I guarantee it.

Yes, you are over-thinking things IMO.

To be fair I think he saved 35 dollars as it was the overall cost that made him turn around. I totally agree with your statement though. You cannot save your youth.

Actually, he saved $30 (or wasted $6, depending on how you look at it), but he had already committed to spending $31 when he drove over there. Then it was the extra unexpected $5 that triggered the change of mind. I do think it seems like an overreaction, given the information we were provided (he really loves the band, and he hadn't spent any money on entertainment this month, plus the fact that he felt conflicted enough over his decision to create a thread about it, as I think if he was absolutely happy and satisfied with what he did, he wouldn't be questioning it).

To the OP, being frugal isn't about cutting out everything. I think for most of us, it's about cutting out the stuff that doesn't matter so you can spend on the stuff that matters. Hopefully you get another chance to see the band - maybe for cheaper!

[Unchained]

A band you were willing to drive 54 miles for at the drop of the hat, and you ditched the gig over a $5 parking charge?

$5 will move you 0 days closer to FI.
$5 compounding at 7.8% over 25 years in $32.69

In 25 years, you would gladly pay $35 to live an evening of being young again and attending a concert.
I guarantee it.

Yes, you are over-thinking things IMO.

To be fair I think he saved 35 dollars as it was the overall cost that made him turn around. I totally agree with your statement though. You cannot save your youth.

Actually, he saved $30 (or wasted $6, depending on how you look at it), but he had already committed to spending $31 when he drove over there. Then it was the extra unexpected $5 that triggered the change of mind. I do think it seems like an overreaction, given the information we were provided (he really loves the band, and he hadn't spent any money on entertainment this month, plus the fact that he felt conflicted enough over his decision to create a thread about it, as I think if he was absolutely happy and satisfied with what he did, he wouldn't be questioning it).

To the OP, being frugal isn't about cutting out everything. I think for most of us, it's about cutting out the stuff that doesn't matter so you can spend on the stuff that matters. Hopefully you get another chance to see the band - maybe for cheaper!

Oh my mistake, seems I thought the concert was 30 dollars and the parking was an additional 5 dollars.

[rocksinmyhead]

I love all these comments too! you guys ARE awesome!

I also love the term "Face Five" :)

Don't pinch pennies for the sake of pinching pennies, this isn't a contest.  Pinch pennies so you can redirect them towards things that bring you happiness.

major words of wisdom here.

I have some great memories from going to concerts, so I consider them money well spent. I have very little memory of the thousands of dollars I used to spend on video games, some of which even went unplayed (or played for a few hours then dropped for something new). The few good memories I have are when I would play games with friends or family. In the end I could have spend considerably less money if I had just realized what was actually important to me, and what was just something I "needed" to have.

There's no mathematical formula for creating good memories out of things you love. In the end, those are the reasons we do the not-fun stuff like go to work and pay our bills.

great example. I feel much the same way... the OP's situation actually resonated with me because my boyfriend and I drove two hours each way to see my favorite band in the world. we had to pay for gas and a hotel, but the tickets were actually free (although I would have paid for them anyway, they are always <$25 which I feel is more than fair to watch a group of amazingly talented people). stuff like this is the REASON I make money (other than obviously to pay for things like housing and food). plus, for me I think a lot would depend on your overall situation. I am making great money and am VERY close to paying off my student loans, at which point I'll be debt free other than a low-balance 0% car loan. I'm definitely comfortable with a small splurge that will make for a really great experience with someone I love. my "allowable splurge" threshold would probably be lower if I had a shit ton of high interest debt or less money coming in.

anyway, I still think Mykl said it best, for most of us it's not about saving money for the sake of saving money, it's about saving it for what's most important to you, which for most of us is working less plus a few special splurges.