I loaned money to a coworker

[Paul der Krake]

A few days ago, I broke one of my own rules of never ever talking monies at work. In fact, I even volunteered to loan a couple hundred dollars so that the colleague could make his rent this month. He was very embarassed but relieved, in fact we agreed to never mention it aside from when he pays me back at the next pay period. I'm not sure why I volunteered- we're not even particularly close.

He's a smart dude, but this is his first "career job" after years of underemployment, and he got blindsided by this new abundance of disposable income. Thankfully he doesn't use credit cards because, from what I've gathered, he already got burned a few years ago.

So let's hear some stories, whether good or bad. Has anyone been taken for a ride doing this? Anything good came out of it?

[forummm]

I loaned a close friend $100 to make rent once. He paid it back a week later on payday. I was OK not getting the money back if it came to it. But I knew he'd follow through. We lived in the same building and sat next to each other in the lab everyday and wrote articles together.

I loaned my brother much more than that so he could get out of debt, fix up his credit, buy a house, and finish school. He still wastes a lot of money. He's now further in debt than when he started (but they're all student loans), his credit is about the same, he still can't buy a house (due to bad credit and no down payment), and he's one class from graduating. I also don't expect to ever get paid back. Was it a good idea? I really don't know. In hindsight, at most I would only have given him a much smaller sum to payoff certain debts strategically.

[hope2retire]

I paid a semester fees ($800) when I was in grad school for my roommate (also in grad school) who did not have that money at that time. I thought adults would stay by their word and atleast have the courtesy to keep us updated on when they will pay back. WRONGGGGGGGGGGG!!! I felt disgusted to chase him to get the money back. He did not even bother to followup even after moving to a different grad school in different state. That is a pet peeve for me, shows how irresponsible some one can be who do not followup. I had to call him up many times to get some money as I was in urgent need of the money at that time. Eventually after 2 yrs i got $600 back. Rest i let it go.

I volunteered to give $4k to another grad student roomie for his father's urgent health care; who was prompt and paid me back soon and I did not ask him for the money at all. He was grateful as no one in our friends circle volunteered when he said his father was in need of urgent care. He is one of the friends from grad school who is still in touch with me regularly. 
Both cases, I volunteered some are responsible and some are not. Lesson for me is to know the person more before volunteering to help, especially if the amount is NOT insignificant to you at that point of your life.


H2R

[Jakejake]

I loaned $1600 to a coworker when she got laid off with no warning, so she could pay her rent, bills, and go on a family vacation she had already paid a sizable down payment for. I knew I'd be okay if she didn't repay me, which is good because I never saw a dime of it back.

[Lordy]

I once lend a friend about EUR 800,- without doing proper paperwork. Over the years I have only seen parts of that repaid.

For all money I have lend since I use a contract template that specifies amount, repayment, interest and collection rights.
Since I do this I never had an issue in getting my money back. It was delayed once but it always made its way back to me.

[sleepyguy]

Brutal, I can say I honestly haven't.  Only to Family and I've been burnt a few times.

$5400 to my brother... never saw a penny of it... then again, he'll never see a dime from me ever again.

$3800 to my sister... she paid me back over about 2yrs, in small installments... brutal... face punch time... it was for a vacation trip they couldn't afford.

Co-signed car-loan with my parents... they were late a few times and I had to bail them... affected my credit score as well.

So yeah, I've learned my lesson. Advice is free... you won't get my money anymore if you burned me (well my parents are an exception).

I loaned $1600 to a coworker when she got laid off with no warning, so she could pay her rent, bills, and go on a family vacation she had already paid a sizable down payment for. I knew I'd be okay if she didn't repay me, which is good because I never saw a dime of it back.

[Katsplaying]

Loaned a co-worker/friend $1500 because I had it available at that time. Terms weren't discussed. It took her about a year to pay me back but it wasn't too big a worry for me as I was in a 2-income relationship and "extra" wasn't a problem (though we were abysmally stupid about money in general and never saved anything).

Been asked repeatedly by my younger brother but both my sis & I laid down the law to him: no asking for money EVER. He is developmentally disabled and has the mentality & maturity of a 13 yr old with concordant lack of impulse control. He functions well enough to hold menial jobs and has a guaranteed income from dad's Naval pension (due to his disability) plus an small annuity for life (purchased for him after mom's death so he wouldn't just blow his portion of her estate).

My sis is in a very scary position as she has a balloon mortgage payment coming up and has saved nothing towards it, yet continues to travel, get a new pet, etc. She also owns both a MiniCooper S  & a Jeep (for getting to work on snowy days), commutes 45 miles to her job, and indulges in elaborate sewing/costuming as a hobby. Were she to approach me for help, I would decline. We talked over this situation a couple years ago when she had more time to prepare and she flat out refused to alter her life in any way to save her home.

My kid is home again (with a bf :/) after 4 years of under-employment & has $1200 in credit card debt. I will buy the food & cover the utilities but when she starts her newest part-time under-employment, there's gonna be a frank discussion around priorities for money. She continues to search for freelance, part- or full-time coding work. They will be saving so they can be ready to move to the coding gig when it comes along (I cannot afford to bankroll them into a new place) so I'll have roomies for at least a couple months. The good news is they are pretty damn good housemates, quiet, clean, respectful, and as long as that continues, I am happy to provide a place....for awhile.

[johnny847]

I mean I've spotted my friends cash when we've stumbled upon cash only vendors (). But they've always paid me back in a prompt manner.

When we're talking about "real" amounts of money, I've never loaned somebody money. I would only be inclined to loan money to someone if we were friends. But if I'm close enough with this person to loan money to them, then I value the friendship too much to loan them money. I'm the type of person that will hold a grudge over an unpaid loan.


Aside: For the life of me I cannot figure out why some people refuse to carry cash and simultaneously do not use an online only bank that allows you to withdraw cash from any ATM and reimburses you for any fees incurred. I can understand the oh I don't want to lose cash argument, but at least get yourself free "insurance" against the rare scenario when you do need cash. Perhaps they just don't know about online banks, but I've told them about this and they still do this. And then ask me to spot them cash.
Maybe I should stop spotting them cash and they'd learn, but I'd feel like a dick.

[Jack]

Nobody's ever asked me to loan them a large amount of money. I don't know if that means I'm just lucky, or if I just give off enough of a cheapskate vibe that they don't bother!

I've been on the borrower side of the equation (with my parents), though. (1) When my wife and I bought a house I asked them for $1500 for the down payment and then paid them back a few months later when I got my $8000 federal tax credit (thanks, Obama!). (2) A few months ago I borrowed $500 because I was a little short on maxing my 2014 IRA. I've tried to pay my parents back, but they keep telling me to make extra student loan payments instead of accepting the check.

[johnny847]

Nobody's ever asked me to loan them a large amount of money. I don't know if that means I'm just lucky, or if I just give off enough of a cheapskate vibe that they don't bother!

I've been on the borrower side of the equation (with my parents), though. (1) When my wife and I bought a house I asked them for $1500 for the down payment and then paid them back a few months later when I got my $8000 federal tax credit (thanks, Obama!). (2) A few months ago I borrowed $500 because I was a little short on maxing my 2014 IRA. I've tried to pay my parents back, but they keep telling me to make extra student loan payments instead of accepting the check.

I do hope you were joking with the "thanks, Obama!" If you get a large tax refund (I assume you don't mean a tax credit here) that just means you set up your withholding wrong.

[MickeyMickey1975]

Nobody's ever asked me to loan them a large amount of money. I don't know if that means I'm just lucky, or if I just give off enough of a cheapskate vibe that they don't bother!

I've been on the borrower side of the equation (with my parents), though. (1) When my wife and I bought a house I asked them for $1500 for the down payment and then paid them back a few months later when I got my $8000 federal tax credit (thanks, Obama!). (2) A few months ago I borrowed $500 because I was a little short on maxing my 2014 IRA. I've tried to pay my parents back, but they keep telling me to make extra student loan payments instead of accepting the check.

I do hope you were joking with the "thanks, Obama!" If you get a large tax refund (I assume you don't mean a tax credit here) that just means you set up your withholding wrong.

Quite sure they are referring to the $8,000 credit available sometime ago for first time homebuyers when the housing market was a mess.

[pbkmaine]

I used to front my boss $20 all the time because he could never get to a cash machine. He was good about paying me back and showed his gratitude by always treating me at Starbucks. A great deal. I love Starbucks but am too cheap to spend my own money there. Usually, though, if someone asks me for a small amount I tell them to pay it forward.

DH and I made a loan to his eldest 18 years ago to pay for a fifth year of college. Our deal was that we would pay for 4 years at a state school, so she had to borrow for year 5. When she was slow about paying it back, we took the money from the fund we had set up for her wedding. When she came for the wedding fund, we told her what we had done. Not a peep out of her. We also told her sisters they could use the fund for their education as well. The other two used theirs for masters degrees.

[Blany]

I am not qualified to loan money as I don't employ any muscle to see that I get paid back.  That said, Ive loaned friends money and have been paid back for the most part. 

[druth]

I have loaned my best friend hundreds of dollars over the years.  Buying tickets for things,spotting him for meals, etc.  he is horrible with money but always pays me back immediately with his next paycheck.  Sure he is broke at the end of every pay period, but he has a steady job and has his priorities straight.

On the other hand I have turned people down for loans when it was obvious to me they had no plan for getting the money back to me.  An ex boyfriend was demoted due to an injury that prevented him from doing his regular job and couldn't make rent.  Well he had no plans to find something better than his demotion, would do stupid things to make the injury worse, and refused to beg to live with his parents who were only a mile away from him.  I'm certain I wouldn't have seen that money again, and I couldn't afford that at the time.

[Jack]

Nobody's ever asked me to loan them a large amount of money. I don't know if that means I'm just lucky, or if I just give off enough of a cheapskate vibe that they don't bother!

I've been on the borrower side of the equation (with my parents), though. (1) When my wife and I bought a house I asked them for $1500 for the down payment and then paid them back a few months later when I got my $8000 federal tax credit (thanks, Obama!). (2) A few months ago I borrowed $500 because I was a little short on maxing my 2014 IRA. I've tried to pay my parents back, but they keep telling me to make extra student loan payments instead of accepting the check.

I do hope you were joking with the "thanks, Obama!" If you get a large tax refund (I assume you don't mean a tax credit here) that just means you set up your withholding wrong.

Quite sure they are referring to the $8,000 credit available sometime ago for first time homebuyers when the housing market was a mess.

Yep, I mean $8000 credit. Free money, above and beyond the the amount to which I would have otherwise been entitled. Also, I'm pretty sure (without digging out my return to check) that I had my withholding adjusted appropriately otherwise.

(FYI, as a stimulus, it worked: although I'd been wanting to buy a house for a while, I might not have rushed to do it in 2009 had it not existed. I actually closed on Dec 30...)

[jsternitzky]

Some people say if you a friend $100 and you never see him again it was probably money well spent.

[Sofa King]

I have loaned a close friend $5,000 over the last 2 years($3grand one time and $2grand another).  This is a guy who makes over $250,000 a year and I make MUCH less than he does.  He was given a house in the late 80's after he was married but now after using it like an ATM owes more on the house than what it is worth. That as well as leasing 2 BMW's for over 20 years. He continues to live pay check to pay check and while he did pay me back the $$$$$ I loaned him he continues every 6 moth's or so to ask for more. I now tell him "sorry don't have the money to spare". I was taking the $$$$$ out of m emergency fund to lend his but at what point when someone keeps hitting you up for $$$$$ does your emergency fund now also become their emergency fund? Enough is enough. I feel $5grand over 2 years was enough and after that he is just taking advantage of our friendship. 

[The Accidental Mustachian]

When i got divorced i was fat broke (and very unmustachian) My lovely sister offered to lend me $13,000 to pay off a loan which would ease my finances considerably. It was on the understanding that i would repay it when the family house sold.

Fast forward 18 months and the very hour that the proceeds of the sale hit my account i repaid it. She refused any interest and i will remain grateful until my dying day and am working hard to ensure that i will never ever be in that position again.

[johnny847]

Nobody's ever asked me to loan them a large amount of money. I don't know if that means I'm just lucky, or if I just give off enough of a cheapskate vibe that they don't bother!

I've been on the borrower side of the equation (with my parents), though. (1) When my wife and I bought a house I asked them for $1500 for the down payment and then paid them back a few months later when I got my $8000 federal tax credit (thanks, Obama!). (2) A few months ago I borrowed $500 because I was a little short on maxing my 2014 IRA. I've tried to pay my parents back, but they keep telling me to make extra student loan payments instead of accepting the check.

I do hope you were joking with the "thanks, Obama!" If you get a large tax refund (I assume you don't mean a tax credit here) that just means you set up your withholding wrong.

Quite sure they are referring to the $8,000 credit available sometime ago for first time homebuyers when the housing market was a mess.

Yep, I mean $8000 credit. Free money, above and beyond the the amount to which I would have otherwise been entitled. Also, I'm pretty sure (without digging out my return to check) that I had my withholding adjusted appropriately otherwise.

(FYI, as a stimulus, it worked: although I'd been wanting to buy a house for a while, I might not have rushed to do it in 2009 had it not existed. I actually closed on Dec 30...)

Wow that's pretty awesome. My apologies for assuming otherwise

[nora]

I paid $2000 for a coworker friend's annual professional fees. He had just got his money all managed by a debt management service which takes the paycheck and divvies it up to the debts, pays your bills and then pays you an allowance for other expenses as things were completely out of control due to his sickness and a long period of missed income.

He paid it back within a few months with 10% interest! I was really surprised and had decided when I paid the bill that I wouldn't care if I got it back or not.

[crispy]

Nobody's ever asked me to loan them a large amount of money. I don't know if that means I'm just lucky, or if I just give off enough of a cheapskate vibe that they don't bother!

I've been on the borrower side of the equation (with my parents), though. (1) When my wife and I bought a house I asked them for $1500 for the down payment and then paid them back a few months later when I got my $8000 federal tax credit (thanks, Obama!). (2) A few months ago I borrowed $500 because I was a little short on maxing my 2014 IRA. I've tried to pay my parents back, but they keep telling me to make extra student loan payments instead of accepting the check.

No one ever asks me either.  I think they assume we are poor!  I did have a client (I work in social services) ask me to co-sign a car loan for her. That still boggles my mind.

[ender]

Nobody's ever asked me to loan them a large amount of money. I don't know if that means I'm just lucky, or if I just give off enough of a cheapskate vibe that they don't bother!

I think most people who know me well enough to feel comfortable asking also know me well enough to know that I wouldn't loan them money.

[thedayisbrave]

I've gifted money to a close friend who is the sweetest, most selfless and hardworking guy I know.  No regrets.

However I've also offered to pay upfront on trips I've taken with a different friend who is flaky and took 3 months to pay me back, and I had to constantly nag her.  Unpleasant, and will not be repeating that.

[10dollarsatatime]

I loaned money to my supervisor once.  $1200.  He did pay me back within two weeks when his 401k loan (!) came in.  However.  The first thing he did when I handed him the check was take the family out for Chinese.  I wanted to slap him.

[Paul der Krake]

Lots of stories about loaning money to friends here. This is the first time I've been asked for "real" money (as opposed to $20 because there's no ATM nearby), but I'm not sure how differently I would have acted if it came from a close friend or family.

To those who haven't been paid back, is it because you felt uncomfortable nudging them?

[DaveSch]

About 20 years ago I loaned a friend some money, I think it was $500 or so. I was repaid.

About the same time I loaned my brother $3000 to help him buy a car. Every month, on time, I got a check for $200 until it was paid off. I knew he would.

Last year I gave my neighbor $200 so he could get his car repaired. It was a gift, not a loan. My neighbor has done a lot for me and I was happy to help. He didn't ask but just mentioned his car needed a brake job and was going to have it done when he got the bucks.

Dave

[oinkette]

One of the nice things about being the "cheap" friend (i.e. the one who doesn't go out to every ladies night at overrated bars) is that people assume you make a modest living. I also don't have what seems like a high-paying career.  No one has ever hit me up for money beyond the usual splitting a bill when they don't have cash as opposed to credit card.

People know about my plans to FIRE, but I think most are assuming it's a pipe dream. I wonder if I'll start being hit up for loans more when I do actually make it.

[Cougar]

 loaned a coworker 2 books over a year ago that i had not read yet and was looking forward to reading them; still waiting to get them back.

[boognish]

I loaned $200 to a friend a few years ago, back when that was a very significant amount to me.

He said he'd pay me back the following pay period, which turned into the next pay period, which turned into the next pay period, which turned into it never being mentioned again. I never followed up on it, and still occasionally cross paths with him (he even picked up a ~$70 tab while out with friends a few months ago). While it may be miserly of me to still have the debt logged in my brain, it's baffling to me that he just forgot.

In hindsight, I wrongly assumed that he'd share my feelings on borrowing money. I'd only ask for money if I desperately needed it, I'd pay it back as soon as possible, and I'd certainly never just "forget" about it.

Lesson learned.

[The Accidental Mustachian]

Oh i forgot, when i was living in a downmarket rental my neighbour was a heroin addict who kept trying to sell me (stolen) stuff, which was amusing/embarrassing as i was a cop. (he really was a thoroughly nice chap tbh) He once knocked at my door really late asking to borrow £20. I gave him £10. My gf said 'you'll never see that again' i said 'you're right but he will never bother me again knowing that he owes me it' I never did see it again but he didn't bother me again either. We all won with that little transaction.

[Miss Prim]

I actually loaned my son quite a bit of money for a down payment for his house because I was concerned about him having to pay PMI and how high his mortgage payment was going to be.  He has since paid it back faithfully every month.  I gave both of my kids a gift of $5000.00 dollars for Christmas and he wanted to immediately pay it back to me against his loan, but I knew he really wanted to get siding for his house, so I told him to just keep paying me monthly until the loan is done. 

But, I would hesitate to loan to anyone but family, because I raised my kids to be responsible, but I don't trust anyone else!  Never really had anyone ask me for money.  Maybe because we look poor! 

                                                                     Miss Prim

[music lover]

I loaned $200 to a friend a few years ago, back when that was a very significant amount to me.

He said he'd pay me back the following pay period, which turned into the next pay period, which turned into the next pay period, which turned into it never being mentioned again. I never followed up on it, and still occasionally cross paths with him (he even picked up a ~$70 tab while out with friends a few months ago). While it may be miserly of me to still have the debt logged in my brain, it's baffling to me that he just forgot.

In hindsight, I wrongly assumed that he'd share my feelings on borrowing money. I'd only ask for money if I desperately needed it, I'd pay it back as soon as possible, and I'd certainly never just "forget" about it.

Lesson learned.

To be fair, some people honestly just forget. I'm one of them, and it's not only when I owe.

Case 1:  A friend spotted me $50 when I had left my credit card in my car. The next day we were golfing and paying for our green fees. He says "Do you have that $50 I lent you yesterday?" It took me a good 4 or 5 seconds to remember that he lent me money the previous day.

Case 2: At Costco with friend...I have a membership and he doesn't. I put a purchase for him on my credit card (about $80) and promptly forgot about it. Two days later he handed me some cash and I had to ask him what it was for.

[boognish]

I loaned $200 to a friend a few years ago, back when that was a very significant amount to me.

He said he'd pay me back the following pay period, which turned into the next pay period, which turned into the next pay period, which turned into it never being mentioned again. I never followed up on it, and still occasionally cross paths with him (he even picked up a ~$70 tab while out with friends a few months ago). While it may be miserly of me to still have the debt logged in my brain, it's baffling to me that he just forgot.

In hindsight, I wrongly assumed that he'd share my feelings on borrowing money. I'd only ask for money if I desperately needed it, I'd pay it back as soon as possible, and I'd certainly never just "forget" about it.

Lesson learned.

To be fair, some people honestly just forget. I'm one of them, and it's not only when I owe.

Case 1:  A friend spotted me $50 when I had left my credit card in my car. The next day we were golfing and paying for our green fees. He says "Do you have that $50 I lent you yesterday?" It took me a good 4 or 5 seconds to remember that he lent me money the previous day.

Case 2: At Costco with friend...I have a membership and he doesn't. I put a purchase for him on my credit card (about $80) and promptly forgot about it. Two days later he handed me some cash and I had to ask him what it was for.

I could see that, but it was $200 when we were both making less than $10/hr at a coffee shop

[mrfilthyrich]

I would rather not go into a huge rant of letting somebody borrow money and then having to bug them for it 3 years later, so I will just say at this point I have a very short list of who I would lend money to.  The worst is one of my friends that asked for money for rent and he said he would pay me in 2 months once he got his next installment of student loans.  Fast forward 6 months later when he is telling me about how he is taking 3 of our friends to an NFL game on the 50 yard line even though he still owed me and a couple of other people as well.  I was not impressed.  Lesson learned at this point.

[fb132]

I loaned 1K$ to my cousin....like all of you, I never got that money back. Lesson learned.

[hunniebun]

I might be a complete fool, but I loaned 500$ to an someone from an online chat room. It was a pregnancy baby chat room and we had been chatting for nearly 3 years. She has 5 kids and was going to be evicted from her home...so I sent her the money.  I received a small portion back, but knew she was struggling, so when she paid back more than half, I forgave the rest and said it was a gift. I don't regret it, but I wouldn't do it again...that is for sure!

[Candace]

Nobody's ever asked me to loan them a large amount of money. I don't know if that means I'm just lucky, or if I just give off enough of a cheapskate vibe that they don't bother!

I've been on the borrower side of the equation (with my parents), though. (1) When my wife and I bought a house I asked them for $1500 for the down payment and then paid them back a few months later when I got my $8000 federal tax credit (thanks, Obama!). (2) A few months ago I borrowed $500 because I was a little short on maxing my 2014 IRA. I've tried to pay my parents back, but they keep telling me to make extra student loan payments instead of accepting the check.

I do hope you were joking with the "thanks, Obama!" If you get a large tax refund (I assume you don't mean a tax credit here) that just means you set up your withholding wrong.

Quite sure they are referring to the $8,000 credit available sometime ago for first time homebuyers when the housing market was a mess.

Yep, I mean $8000 credit. Free money, above and beyond the the amount to which I would have otherwise been entitled. Also, I'm pretty sure (without digging out my return to check) that I had my withholding adjusted appropriately otherwise.

(FYI, as a stimulus, it worked: although I'd been wanting to buy a house for a while, I might not have rushed to do it in 2009 had it not existed. I actually closed on Dec 30...)

Actually thank Bush since that credit started in April 2008 before Obama was even elected

On topic, I've lent money a few times and usually didn't get it back. Never lent more than I could afford to lose but it always ends up bothering me when people don't seem to care about the lack of respect it shows

To be fair, some people honestly just forget. I'm one of them, and it's not only when I owe.

With family I always forget when I'm on the loaning side (and it's never more than $100). My sister laughs every time she pays me back and I have to ask what it was for
[/quote

On the tax credit, I believe it is repayable to the IRS over 15 years, so it's not free money. It's an interest-free loan.

http://www.irs.gov/uac/Tax-Credit-to-Aid-First-Time-Homebuyers%3b-Must-Be-Repaid-Over-15-Years-

[lackofstache]

I've borrowed money twice & loaned twice.

I borrowed money from my parents to buy my first car. I had $1500 saved & they loaned me the other $1500. I paid them back each time  got paid until it was paid back. THey didn't keep record of how much of the loan was left, but I did. I should've found a cheaper car.

I borrowed $10k from my brother to get a side business going. We got some equipment, were preparing the space & found out my wife had cancer & a huuuuge deductible because she was on her parents' health plan. We sold the equipment, used the money for that and are paying him back on schedule with nothing to show. I should've never borrowed the $.

I loaned my other brother $3-500 twice while I was in high school. It took a few weeks to get the $ back, but he paid me back. I may be the only person that he's ever paid back, though. I think my parents have "loaned" him more $ than they'd care to think about.

[Candace]

Nobody's ever asked me to loan them a large amount of money. I don't know if that means I'm just lucky, or if I just give off enough of a cheapskate vibe that they don't bother!

I've been on the borrower side of the equation (with my parents), though. (1) When my wife and I bought a house I asked them for $1500 for the down payment and then paid them back a few months later when I got my $8000 federal tax credit (thanks, Obama!). (2) A few months ago I borrowed $500 because I was a little short on maxing my 2014 IRA. I've tried to pay my parents back, but they keep telling me to make extra student loan payments instead of accepting the check.

I do hope you were joking with the "thanks, Obama!" If you get a large tax refund (I assume you don't mean a tax credit here) that just means you set up your withholding wrong.

Quite sure they are referring to the $8,000 credit available sometime ago for first time homebuyers when the housing market was a mess.

Yep, I mean $8000 credit. Free money, above and beyond the the amount to which I would have otherwise been entitled. Also, I'm pretty sure (without digging out my return to check) that I had my withholding adjusted appropriately otherwise.

(FYI, as a stimulus, it worked: although I'd been wanting to buy a house for a while, I might not have rushed to do it in 2009 had it not existed. I actually closed on Dec 30...)

Actually thank Bush since that credit started in April 2008 before Obama was even elected

On the tax credit, I believe it is repayable to the IRS over 15 years, so it's not free money. It's an interest-free loan.

http://www.irs.gov/uac/Tax-Credit-to-Aid-First-Time-Homebuyers%3b-Must-Be-Repaid-Over-15-Years-

The first round was a 15 year interest free loan, the second round was a straight credit. I had a friend who closed 12/31/08...if he had closed a day later he wouldn't have had to pay his back (actually he still would have but that's a whole other story)

Wow!

[Cassie]

my hubby loaned a couple he was fairly good friends with $500 when there trailer flooded & they had no insurance. The y had minimum wage jobs so I never expected to see the $. Fast forward a few years & they invited us over for steak.  While eating they said they had won $50,000 at the casino. They never paid us our $ & we never spoke to them again. I would have been fine with never getting the $ if they had not won all that $.

[hybrid]

A little different spin, my FIL gave me $1000 to invest on his behalf around 2000. I bought Cisco and Cisco promptly tanked. It was many years before that ever turned around. Both sides eventually forgot about it, I sold the stock at a loss and bought other, better stocks over time. At a birthday party perhaps three years ago I surprised him with a check for $1500. He said he had given me that money to learn about buying and selling stock and I guess he was right all along.

[Nancy]

I lent my father $1,600 four or so years ago to get his heat back on during winter. We agreed on a payment schedule before I gave him the money, but he never paid me back. I reminded him about it for a year, and he was angry at me for asking for it back. At the same time, I lent my closest sister $900 to make rent. Same deal except she started avoiding me. I was not surprised by their behavior since it was consistent with how they had treated me my entire life (as means to an end). It helped me fully realize what I had always known: my blood relations are not capable of or willing to care about me in the way that I am able to care about them. I found the situation to be difficult but ultimately very positive (it helped free me of the net of "family" as defined by our society). I feel sympathy for them. Now, we intereact on a level where we can enjoy each other's company and shared history, but no one is getting used or expecting more of the other than that person is capable of giving.

If someone asked me for money, I would give it as a gift or not at all.

[DirtDiva]

If someone asked me for money, I would give it as a gift or not at all.

We loaned my brother-in-law 1$k for a deposit on a rental. He moved to be near my in-laws who aren't getting any younger, but to a location with no jobs (not that he ever really held a job anyway).

We agreed before writing the check that: 1) we privately considered it a gift because he has a history of not paying back loans, and 2) we wouldn't do it again if he didn't pay it back. 

When we walked into his new rental home and saw the new wall-sized flat screen TV, there was a moment of resentment, but we let it go.

[fartface]

My friend got $50K into credit card debt, then promptly declared bankruptcy. Further, she borrowed money from her mom and her FIL.

I think she paid her mom back, however, one day she was complaining about her FIL. They borrowed $800 from him and she was pissed he had the nerve to ask for it back a year or two later. She said, "that's family and family should't expect to be paid back. can you believe he is asking us for that $800 after all this time?"

I made a mental note to myself NEVER to loan her money. Jeeze Louise.

[rocketpj]

I've had a couple of friends whom I've loaned money and they've repaid me within days or weeks.

I have had 2 friends where it ruined the friendship.  In both cases I knew they were utterly irresponsible with money (at the time I wasn't much better, but I was at least employed). 

One of them I loaned $300 for him to buy a small boat - when he sold it onward 3 months later for the same price he didn't even think to pay me back, and got mad when I brought it up.  He stopped coming around - after initially being hurt I realized what an unhealthy friendship it had been and moved on.

The other one still boggles my mind.  Good friend for years, amazing cook, we always had a great time together.  I loaned him $30 once for some reason I can't even recall.  I never once asked him for it (I knew it was a loss as I was doing it), but he felt bad about it.  Not bad enough just to repay the cash, but bad enough to stop coming around.  I'm still amazed.  I saw him several years later and he was both happy to see me and still carrying a guilty look.  For $30!

[pachnik]

The other one still boggles my mind.  Good friend for years, amazing cook, we always had a great time together.  I loaned him $30 once for some reason I can't even recall.  I never once asked him for it (I knew it was a loss as I was doing it), but he felt bad about it.  Not bad enough just to repay the cash, but bad enough to stop coming around.  I'm still amazed.  I saw him several years later and he was both happy to see me and still carrying a guilty look.  For $30!

Wow, that is weird.  I mean for $30.00? 

I've never lent anyone money except for the odd co-worker who needed a few bucks to get their car out of the parking garage but I was always paid back really fast.  Before MMM, I was often complaining about $, so I guess no one would ask me which is just as well.  I would  even have imaginary financial crises back then.  Now, after MMM, my money is all tied up anyway. 

In my family, I am pretty much at the bottom of the income/expenses totem, so no worries there.  From the looks of things, I shop at the thrift store, take my lunch to work and have no spendy hobbies, I'm sure I don't appear affluent.   Don't think anyone knows that I am saving about 35% of my income now though.   :)

[Roothy]

I've had pretty mixed history with loaning money and getting paid back.  A few times I've loaned huge amounts to friends--$50,000 for a bridge loan for friends who were refinancing their condo; $22,000 to another friend who was going through a divorce--and was paid back.  I knew they were good for it when I loaned it.  I loaned $20,000 to my sister when she was going through a divorce, and got paid back (after several years) when she sold her house.  She gave me an extra $2000 in interest, which I appreciated.

(Much) smaller amounts I've loaned and never seen again, for friends/exes/family.  Interestingly it's the small amounts--$1000 and under--that I usually never see again and frankly never expect to.

Currently, my down-and-out brother owes me about $9000 for consolidating and paying off his credit cards.  It started at $12,000.  I agreed to do it if a) he gave me all the passwords to his bank account/paypal, and b) let me set up automatic payments of $400 to be transferred to my bank account monthly.  I also c) have an automatic email sent to him at the end of every month, about five days before the draw on his account reminding him to have money in the account for the transfer.  So far, so good.  I think what I've done with my brother is actually a really good way to do it.  If they resent it or balk, well, they probably weren't sincere about paying you back.  When I proposed these terms to my (big) brother he said, "Well, you're the adult here," which I thought was pretty funny.

[Paul der Krake]

Update! Today was payday, and the coworker repaid me immediately after I sat down at my desk this morning. Glad to not have misjudged his character.

Optimism gun! Trust! Yay!

[norcalmike]

I did that once. Never again.
 Loaned a coworker $1000. I was lucky to get $500 back after some hounding. He quit and disappeared before I could get the rest.