Author Topic: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..  (Read 6316 times)

Bearblastbeats

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How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« on: October 06, 2018, 07:57:02 AM »
As you know, I recently left my former employer of 4 years to go work for another company.

Before taking the new position I had tried to see if former would negotiate compensation and title for the work I was doing. After many attempts and turn downs I then left for the new company who provided me the title and salary I was looking for.

After the past 3 weeks, I still keep in contact with some of my coworkers and they have mentioned that they are looking to hire someone as a Project Manager and are offering a salary of close to 90k, which is 20k more than I was trying to negotiate with them.

It's a little sucky and it's hard not to feel resentful but it is what it is. They could have just given that to me.

Anyone else experience this from old jobs?

fuzzy math

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #1 on: October 06, 2018, 08:10:40 AM »
My old employer had a merger of 2 locations and as the least senior person they laid me off. They knew this was going to occur when they hired me, yet they let me move there (my industry is so specific that taking a new job almost always requires a move), buy a house, then 10 weeks into my job, announced my layoff in front of my entire department.

Everyone knew the work load would have supported our full sized merged team. Everyone went to administration and told them it was stupid. I heard 4 months after I left that everyone was getting killed. 18 months afterwards they finally posted the job, MY JOB. A mutual friend of my old colleagues and I was tasked to text me to find out if I was going to reapply for my old job (after I moved 1800 miles away) because the organization and my old coworkers sure as hell were too afraid to approach me. As much as we wanted to go back to the old city, I was NEVER EVER EVER going to allow them to have the power over me again. I refused to lower myself to applying again, to find out if they'd accept or reject me again. Scorched earth. Fuck them.

Fuck your old employer. Yes it stings, but toughen yourself up enough to be able to genuinely say fuck you to them (at least in your head). They aren't worth it.
The people who recognize how stupid what happened was likely have no power, they are not to blame. The people who make decisions are too stupid to ever get it, they aren't worth your time.

I'd honestly recommend treating this like an abusive relationship, or at least a bad breakup. Its best if you have full separation. There are people who come and go in your life, and unless these old coworkers are genuinely friends outside of work its best if you distance yourself until the hurt is gone.

On the bright side, it doesn't sound like you were laid off, or had to move. You got a new job on your terms and you got the title and salary you wanted. Put your energy into that and see if you can find people at this new position who will fill the void that missing your old coworkers has left you.

G-dog

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #2 on: October 06, 2018, 08:11:39 AM »
Oh yes. I think it is very common. What is also common is having your “raise” not keep pace with market targets, which can result in more senior staff making less than new hires into the same position.

Sadly, you are not alone.

Freedomin5

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #3 on: October 06, 2018, 08:11:48 AM »
Comparison is the thief of joy.

Let go. Move on.

Zette

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #4 on: October 06, 2018, 08:48:38 AM »
It's a business strategy.  They were gambling to see if they could keep you for less than market rate.  You were smart to call them on it and make a move to another company.  For every person who leaves for another company, there are probably 5 that don't want to disrupt their routines to go out and look.  The company keeps its costs down by playing the odds, even if they occasionally lose the bet and have to hire someone new at market rate.  Nothing personal, just business.  Don't waste your energy being bitter toward them -- they don't even notice.

use2betrix

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #5 on: October 06, 2018, 09:06:29 AM »
As you know, I recently left my former employer of 4 years to go work for another company.

Before taking the new position I had tried to see if former would negotiate compensation and title for the work I was doing. After many attempts and turn downs I then left for the new company who provided me the title and salary I was looking for.

After the past 3 weeks, I still keep in contact with some of my coworkers and they have mentioned that they are looking to hire someone as a Project Manager and are offering a salary of close to 90k, which is 20k more than I was trying to negotiate with them.

It's a little sucky and it's hard not to feel resentful but it is what it is. They could have just given that to me.

Anyone else experience this from old jobs?

Instead of feeling resentful I would take an introspective look at myself as to why they would rather bring someone on new with higher pay and a higher title as opposed to offering that to myself.

I’m sure everyone wants to blame the employer, but I’d be taking a pretty hard look at myself.

RedmondStash

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #6 on: October 06, 2018, 10:31:35 AM »
You could always apply for the job.

In terms of how not to feel resentful -- maybe you should. At least for a while. Get it out of your system. And then realize that 1) life isn't fair, 2) people are only human and aren't fair, and 3) moving to a new job might end up being better for you anyway. A crappy thing that happens to you that ends up propelling you in a good direction can end up being a blessing in disguise.

And also 4) count your blessings, whatever they are. The best antidote to resentment is gratitude. One thing you can be grateful for is learning that sometimes, to get a raise and title bump, you have to move to a different company. I'm sure you've learned other things from the experience too.

GuitarStv

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #7 on: October 06, 2018, 10:35:46 AM »
There's nothing really to feel resentful about.  They didn't value you while you were there, but have realized your worth now that you're gone.  The job advertisement is proof that you were right and they made a mistake.  You're already working at a new company making the money you wanted to . . . so who cares?

TomTX

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #8 on: October 06, 2018, 10:37:56 AM »
As you know, I recently left my former employer of 4 years to go work for another company.

Before taking the new position I had tried to see if former would negotiate compensation and title for the work I was doing. After many attempts and turn downs I then left for the new company who provided me the title and salary I was looking for.

After the past 3 weeks, I still keep in contact with some of my coworkers and they have mentioned that they are looking to hire someone as a Project Manager and are offering a salary of close to 90k, which is 20k more than I was trying to negotiate with them.

It's a little sucky and it's hard not to feel resentful but it is what it is. They could have just given that to me.

Anyone else experience this from old jobs?

Lols - if you otherwise liked working there and it's more than your new position, go ahead and apply :D

You're probably in the initial 90 day probationary period anyway - and that works both ways.

Adam Zapple

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #9 on: October 06, 2018, 10:43:44 AM »
Many companies will not compete with offers from another employer when an employee threatens to leave.  This may be stated outright or something that they generally try to follow.  They know that most people don't want to go through the hassle of switching jobs and most will stay put, even with other offers on the table. 

You've just landed a new job with a better title and better pay.  I would suggest just taking 20 minutes every morning to remind yourself to be grateful for what you have.  Call it quiet time, call it meditation, call it whatever you want but I can tell you that just sitting by yourself in peace and quiet and attempting to clear your head can really change your life for the better.  Helps put things into perspective.

@TomTX - that is a great suggestion.  Worth a good laugh even if it doesn't work out.

Bearblastbeats

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #10 on: October 06, 2018, 11:42:06 AM »
Thanks everyone for the support. It was a toxic environment and not being stressed out every day is a great feeling.

I'm just gonna ride this wave for a while and see what happens.

big_slacker

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #11 on: October 06, 2018, 12:58:49 PM »
Getting a new job and making more money usually does the trick for me. :D

DaMa

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #12 on: October 06, 2018, 02:26:41 PM »
It's a business strategy.  They were gambling to see if they could keep you for less than market rate occasionally lose the bet and have to hire someone new at market rate.  Nothing personal, just business.  Don't waste your energy being bitter toward them -- they don't even notice.

+1
I've worked at several companies over 20+ years, and it was always the same.  Annual raises were strictly limited between narrow corridors around 3 or 4%.  Promotions were also limited to 10% (or less in more recent years).  Increases outside of that were very very rare and were very dependent on leaders to fight for it.  Most leaders wouldn't make more than a minor effort if any at all.  The market rate was always better after a few years, so those motivated to leave could always get more money. 

I knew a few people who used a counteroffer to get good increases, but there were a lot of leaders who would never offer a counter.

At the big company I worked at, leaving for several years and coming back was done frequently by top performers.

nick663

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #13 on: October 06, 2018, 02:47:23 PM »
There's nothing really to feel resentful about.  They didn't value you while you were there, but have realized your worth now that you're gone.  The job advertisement is proof that you were right and they made a mistake.  You're already working at a new company making the money you wanted to . . . so who cares?
This.  They now know what you used to do was worth far more than you were making or even asking for.  I would laugh and move on as that is an admittance that you were correct in requesting a higher salary.

I've always found it more offensive when an employers offers to match a salary when you have a job offer.  That can be paraphrased as "we knew you were worth that much this whole time but we didn't feel like giving it to you." 

Many companies will not compete with offers from another employer when an employee threatens to leave.  This may be stated outright or something that they generally try to follow.  They know that most people don't want to go through the hassle of switching jobs and most will stay put, even with other offers on the table. 
If someone has gone through the hassle of applying, interviewing, and notifying their current employer... they are ready to leave.  That's a stupid game of chicken if management believes that they are going to retain an employee with no concessions.

I have had generous offers to stay at my previous 2 companies when resigning.  My impression is that is common.

Telecaster

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #14 on: October 06, 2018, 02:48:57 PM »
As you know, I recently left my former employer of 4 years to go work for another company.

Before taking the new position I had tried to see if former would negotiate compensation and title for the work I was doing. After many attempts and turn downs I then left for the new company who provided me the title and salary I was looking for.

After the past 3 weeks, I still keep in contact with some of my coworkers and they have mentioned that they are looking to hire someone as a Project Manager and are offering a salary of close to 90k, which is 20k more than I was trying to negotiate with them.

It's a little sucky and it's hard not to feel resentful but it is what it is. They could have just given that to me.

Anyone else experience this from old jobs?

Living well is the best revenge.   

AnnaGrowsAMustache

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #15 on: October 06, 2018, 03:09:02 PM »
I find it helpful to be quietly petty! My former employer had a catch phrase 'I beg to differ', and she'd say it with her mouth all pursed like a cat's arse. For nearly a year after I left, I had a picture of a cat's arse on my fridge with 'I beg to differ' written on it. It made me smile....

pecunia

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #16 on: October 06, 2018, 03:20:19 PM »
Go Back?

Burn me once shame on you.

Burn me twice shame on me.

I had a conversation with a human resources person once.  This person told me that they try to pay folks just enough so that they won't leave.  Why should they pay you more?  Same work for less money is like low bid.  It's the best deal.

They don't like unions.  It makes them play fair.  They tell you "professionals" neither form nor join unions and laugh all the way to the bank.

trollwithamustache

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #17 on: October 06, 2018, 03:53:35 PM »
Its not personal. They pay what they think market is. They slowly finding out they were wrong.

Also, note that returning a few years later is a common strategy to jump up another level in pay and responsibilities.

pecunia

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #18 on: October 06, 2018, 03:55:07 PM »
Its not personal. They pay what they think market is. They slowly finding out they were wrong.

Also, note that returning a few years later is a common strategy to jump up another level in pay and responsibilities.

I have seen that one.  I have also seen resentment from his or her former peers.

Laura33

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #19 on: October 08, 2018, 09:22:02 AM »
Dude -- you won.  They stuck with their "process" and refused to pay you what you were worth.  You found someone who did.  And then they finally were to realize that you were a massively good deal and now they have to offer tons more money just to find someone who is both able to do what you did and willing to put up with their toxic environment (and lose even more money/efficiency in training them, too).  So, basically, your old management gets to suffer the giant sucking sound of profits going down the drain because they didn't meet your eminently reasonable requests.  Meanwhile, you are out of that environment, with the title and pay you deserve, and you never have to devote even a millisecond to thinking about those losers ever again. 

This is a referendum on them, not you.  I would think their job posting reinforces what a good decision you made in leaving, as it amply demonstrates that your old management is petty, short-sighted, and too stupid to figure out they've got a good thing until they chase it away, yes?  I'd work a little more on your gloating skills if I were you.  Repeat after me:  "I told you so."

FWIW, I know from resenting.  Ask me about DH's company, which moved us across the country to their most profitable fab, and then shut it down when I was 6 months pregnant so the Big Boss could meet certain post-merger financial targets that made him eligible for a nine-figure stock grant.  No one on earth has ever been happier than I was when Big Boss went to jail a few years later for diddling the books.  Karma's a bitch, and so am I.   

ditheca

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #20 on: October 08, 2018, 10:45:41 AM »
It's a little sucky and it's hard not to feel resentful but it is what it is. They could have just given that to me.

You can still submit your resume to be considered for the position as a new hire!  (Not that you'd actually take the job now, but it could be fun to rub their mistake in their face...)

Davids

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #21 on: October 08, 2018, 10:52:20 AM »
I have been in my current job for 6 years now. I had a lot of resent toy former employer when I left because I was underpaid and felt under appreciated. I don't think about it now so eventually time heals all wounds.

mm1970

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #22 on: October 08, 2018, 10:56:53 AM »
As you know, I recently left my former employer of 4 years to go work for another company.

Before taking the new position I had tried to see if former would negotiate compensation and title for the work I was doing. After many attempts and turn downs I then left for the new company who provided me the title and salary I was looking for.

After the past 3 weeks, I still keep in contact with some of my coworkers and they have mentioned that they are looking to hire someone as a Project Manager and are offering a salary of close to 90k, which is 20k more than I was trying to negotiate with them.

It's a little sucky and it's hard not to feel resentful but it is what it is. They could have just given that to me.

Anyone else experience this from old jobs?
Yes, but I look at it this way - in a more positive light.

All companies want to have the most qualified people for the least amount possible.  You were trying to get more money - they were incredibly resistant.  Whatever.

Then you left and ...oops, they realized that they actually needed you, or someone to fulfill that specific task.  Many many times, companies go out to find someone to replace someone who left and realize - they cannot find anyone for that salary. It's pretty typical.

At my own company, we grew a lot many years ago and needed to hire more senior engineers.  Our board member told me "we need more people like you!"  I said "good luck finding people like me to work for what I'm getting paid."  Over the space of a few years, we hired 5 new senior engineers.  The lowest paid of the engineers was making $20,000 more than I was.  Three of them were awful, I had to train them or just flat out do their work, and they were eventually let go.  The other two were worth their weight in gold (of course they were the least paid of the 5 - and ahem - female).  One quit in frustration and the other was let go during a mass layoff.

The reason they were all paid so much more?  We literally could not get anyone to come here for less.  Because that was the going rate.  The big boss's plan was to hire them in, and then bring up the pay of everyone else.  Phase 2 never happened.  Sigh.

It's not my first experience with this either.  My spouse's company has similar problems.  And at my previous company - many many people quit to go elsewhere for more money, or quit to get more flexibility.  Eventually when that happens 2-3 times, you learn to increase the pay you are offering people or give them flexibility.

Bearblastbeats

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #23 on: October 08, 2018, 12:05:16 PM »
Dude -- you won.  They stuck with their "process" and refused to pay you what you were worth.  You found someone who did.  And then they finally were to realize that you were a massively good deal and now they have to offer tons more money just to find someone who is both able to do what you did and willing to put up with their toxic environment (and lose even more money/efficiency in training them, too).  So, basically, your old management gets to suffer the giant sucking sound of profits going down the drain because they didn't meet your eminently reasonable requests.  Meanwhile, you are out of that environment, with the title and pay you deserve, and you never have to devote even a millisecond to thinking about those losers ever again. 

This is a referendum on them, not you.  I would think their job posting reinforces what a good decision you made in leaving, as it amply demonstrates that your old management is petty, short-sighted, and too stupid to figure out they've got a good thing until they chase it away, yes?  I'd work a little more on your gloating skills if I were you.  Repeat after me:  "I told you so."

FWIW, I know from resenting.  Ask me about DH's company, which moved us across the country to their most profitable fab, and then shut it down when I was 6 months pregnant so the Big Boss could meet certain post-merger financial targets that made him eligible for a nine-figure stock grant.  No one on earth has ever been happier than I was when Big Boss went to jail a few years later for diddling the books.  Karma's a bitch, and so am I.

Thank you for this :)

DS

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #24 on: October 08, 2018, 12:14:27 PM »
There's nothing really to feel resentful about.  They didn't value you while you were there, but have realized your worth now that you're gone.  The job advertisement is proof that you were right and they made a mistake.  You're already working at a new company making the money you wanted to . . . so who cares?

This is how I feel after switching jobs last year. *shrug*

PDXTabs

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #25 on: October 08, 2018, 12:55:59 PM »
Anyone else experience this from old jobs?

Try not to let it get to you. Seriously, they might not have realized how valuable you were until after you left. Sometimes life is like that. I once quit a job and came back 13 months later for a 32% raise. I could be bitter or I could sip vino verde on a nice patio somewhere.

ETA: Similar to what fuzzy math wrote, I have become known in my local industry for working hard, doing good work, and not putting up with unprofessional behavior. That's not a bad reputation to have. If you are treated in an unprofessional manner, you are allowed to say so on the way out the door, as long as you say it in a professional way. Even the worst narcissist will understand "you didn't treat me in a professional manner, so I left."
« Last Edit: October 08, 2018, 01:53:31 PM by PDXTabs »

Mississippi Mudstache

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #26 on: October 08, 2018, 01:24:55 PM »
Many companies will not compete with offers from another employer when an employee threatens to leave.  This may be stated outright or something that they generally try to follow.  They know that most people don't want to go through the hassle of switching jobs and most will stay put, even with other offers on the table. 

That may be true, but it's always worth asking, if you're actually willing to stay on with your old employer for more money. When I left my last job, my manager was gracious but told me he wished I'd at least given him the opportunity to sweeten the pot for me. I certainly would have entertained a better offer if it was just about the money, but I left for a job that I like twice as much and a location where I could happily live for the rest of my life, so there was no way I was turning it down.

Chrissy

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #27 on: October 08, 2018, 01:57:21 PM »
My husband just left an employer, and is really struggling with his resentment AND the resentment he still holds for past employers.  He likes to fly the plane directly into the mountain, as I say; he never bails or bails way too late. 

The only thing I can think of to help him, and maybe you, is to tell you to leave EARLIER.  Don't let the slights and rejections build up.  I told him last year they had no retention strategy for him.  If they don't want you to stay, they want you to leave!

MDfive21

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #28 on: October 09, 2018, 09:49:41 AM »
i would just let it go if were me.  BUT, if you want to waste their time and mess with their heads a little, apply and see how far you can get in the interview process before they realize your new pay requirement is waaaay over what they'll pay you.  maybe they'll fly you out for an interview and you can show up in bermuda shorts and a hawaiian shirt, asking for $150k and a company car.

saguaro

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #29 on: October 09, 2018, 10:43:32 AM »
I have left several jobs in my career over compensation and title for the work I was doing, the last time was 12 years ago.  I never felt resentment towards the former employer as it was my decision to leave.  Even in the one instance where the job I jumped to didn't work out and I left after six months, it was still a stepping stone up to a better position shortly after.  I generally don't look back on past employers with the exception of the one time I was wrongly fired but that's a different story and I am long over it.

In the one instance where a former employer did call me to ask if I would consider coming back, with higher pay, it was basically to fix all the things that went wrong during the last two years since my departure as they completely underestimated all that I did.  I didn't take it.

Gremlin

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #30 on: October 09, 2018, 03:52:34 PM »
i would just let it go if were me.  BUT, if you want to waste their time and mess with their heads a little, apply and see how far you can get in the interview process before they realize your new pay requirement is waaaay over what they'll pay you.  maybe they'll fly you out for an interview and you can show up in bermuda shorts and a hawaiian shirt, asking for $150k and a company car.

I wouldn't do that.  Whilst you might want to stick it to "the company", the reality is that you're only going to piss off the individuals involved in recruiting who are just trying to do their job.  "The company" won't care.  Whereas you'll burn bridges with the individuals.  Some of whom may move on to other companies in the future, companies that you may want to work for.  In which case your reputation for being a tool will precede you.

MDfive21

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #31 on: October 10, 2018, 10:41:36 AM »
agreed.  i was mostly joking.  anyone who actually did that better have FU money and then post the story in the epic FU money thread.

clarkfan1979

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #32 on: October 10, 2018, 06:55:09 PM »
I turned down a job in which they offered me 67.5K. I flew to D.C. and interviewed for 2 days. I told them I wouldn't take less than 85K. They said 85K was not possible.

After about 4 years of not being to hire anyone they finally decided to increase the budget for the position. A head hunter called me in 2015 and asked if I would be interested in interviewing for the position again. They increased the budget to start at 105K. With my experience, I would be around 120K.

If they offered me 85K, I would have taken it. Now 4 years later, I rejected 120K.

FamilyGuy

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #33 on: October 10, 2018, 10:00:46 PM »
In my company they can increase the salary only by a set percentage max - depending on company profit etc. But there is a different process to decide package for open positions where they try to give close to the market rate at that point of time.
It’s all weird though. Good luck and good to move on !!!

GuitarStv

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #34 on: October 11, 2018, 01:14:16 PM »
In my company they can increase the salary only by a set percentage max - depending on company profit etc. But there is a different process to decide package for open positions where they try to give close to the market rate at that point of time.
It’s all weird though. Good luck and good to move on !!!

It's not weird at all.  Looking for a new job is a pain in the ass, and employers know that.  Most of them will pay employees who have been at the company for many years much less than a new employee they're trying to entice to work there . . . even if they're doing the same job.

PDXTabs

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #35 on: October 11, 2018, 03:45:49 PM »
It's not weird at all.  Looking for a new job is a pain in the ass, and employers know that.  Most of them will pay employees who have been at the company for many years much less than a new employee they're trying to entice to work there . . . even if they're doing the same job.

I still think it's bat-shit crazy. You should not underpay the people that know your internal processes and posses a ton of institutional knowledge in their head. It's fine if some of your people are under-payed relative to their title and years of experience, because you don't mind if they leave. But that should not be the case for the ones that you want to keep.

FreshlyFIREd

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #36 on: October 11, 2018, 06:23:52 PM »
How to not feel resentful towards former employer..

I dealt with resentment by repeating the following to myself - everyday ...

"At the end of the day - WE ARE EVEN"

At the end of the day, they can fire me ... or I can fire them.

FamilyGuy

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #37 on: October 11, 2018, 08:57:17 PM »
It's not weird at all.  Looking for a new job is a pain in the ass, and employers know that.  Most of them will pay employees who have been at the company for many years much less than a new employee they're trying to entice to work there . . . even if they're doing the same job.

I still think it's bat-shit crazy. You should not underpay the people that know your internal processes and posses a ton of institutional knowledge in their head. It's fine if some of your people are under-payed relative to their title and years of experience, because you don't mind if they leave. But that should not be the case for the ones that you want to keep.
I agree. At least both old employee and the new one should be paid comparatively. I understand the new guy mignt bring in a different perspective but most often the skill sets are the same. It is totally unfair to pay the new one a higher package when existing employee of same skill set and role are paid less.

GuitarStv

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #38 on: October 12, 2018, 07:10:39 AM »
It's not weird at all.  Looking for a new job is a pain in the ass, and employers know that.  Most of them will pay employees who have been at the company for many years much less than a new employee they're trying to entice to work there . . . even if they're doing the same job.

I still think it's bat-shit crazy. You should not underpay the people that know your internal processes and posses a ton of institutional knowledge in their head. It's fine if some of your people are under-payed relative to their title and years of experience, because you don't mind if they leave. But that should not be the case for the ones that you want to keep.
I agree. At least both old employee and the new one should be paid comparatively. I understand the new guy mignt bring in a different perspective but most often the skill sets are the same. It is totally unfair to pay the new one a higher package when existing employee of same skill set and role are paid less.

It's totally unfair but it makes good business sense.  You should always pay people the least amount possible.  It makes your company more profitable.  Yes, you run the risk of some employees jumping ship . . . but the vast majority of them will just deal with it.  Employees are resources and shouldn't be thought of as people.

pecunia

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Re: How to not feel resentful towards former employer..
« Reply #39 on: October 20, 2018, 03:23:15 AM »
As far as the resentment thing, just move on.

A wise man told me when I lost a job due to a bad situation, "If you let it eat on you, they've won."  He was right.  I have moved on.  If I had the old position, it would have stifled me.  Moving on gives one an opportunity for growth.  It is doubtful the new job will be the same as the old.  You will learn new things.