Assuming the personal stocks and 401k/Roth categories do not overlap, my math says you have at least $1.5M in liquid assets, PLUS a pension starting at an undefined time, PLUS Social Security income starting in 20y. You could retire safely right now if you were willing to reduce spending to about $55k/year, maybe $60k, and maybe higher than that depending on what cfiresim says.
Here's how:
1) First, graciously accept this facepunch: If you were willing to shell out $6,800 for a fence, you're either a rancher with 2,000 acres or someone living in a very fancy neighborhood with pressures for conspicuous consumption. Think about that financial mistake and the social pressures that led you to make it. Think about how you'd still have that money if you lived elsewhere, among different people more accepting of chain-link. Think about how you'd be retired now if you didn't have to treat your money this way, and that by extension, how you are working now and will be working years from now for things like that fence. How many years of your life is it worth doing this specific sort of thing? How is this fence a metaphor for how you are spending your remaining time on this earth?
2) Now the left hook: Sell one of the 3 cars. You are only 2 people. Why optionally pay for an entire extra car's depreciation, maintenance, insurance, etc? It may only cost you $2500/year to own that beater or "fun" car, but to spend that way in retirement you'll need at least 25X that amount = $62,500. How many months of hard work does that third car represent as it sits there 99% of the time?
3) Can you work remotely? Ask. Eliminate your commuting costs and risks if possible and open up geo-arbitrage opportunities.
4) Instead of spending hours on error-prone manual spreadsheets, use Mint.com to track your spending, income, and assets. You need to have these numbers at your fingertips at all times and you have better things to do than manual personal accounting.
5) Build a budget that strictly totals $55-60k. Include savings in the budget for things like vehicle repair/replacement, a new roof, a new HVAC, new fridge, bath remod someday, travel, etc. Spend six months living on that amount. Did you succeed or fail, and why? What is your FIRE number, and why does it have to be so high? Keep trying until you make it.
6) Sell your fancy home and buy a modest house for $200k in a tax-friendly Low Cost Of Living (LCOL) state that has expanded Medicaid per the ACA. Consider paying cash for this home. Get rid of most of your "nice" things, as there are nice things for sale in the marketplace all day every day. There's never any need to hold an expensive inventory of stuff you don't need, just because it's "nice". Look for a small home with accessible bathrooms and not a lot of deferred maintenance. I do not recommend the RV life of renting a parking spot and paying out the nose for depreciation (instead of building equity) while puttering back and forth to the grocery store in a massive, empty truck that has the highest operating cost of anything this side of construction equipment.
7) Find something to retire to. Will you travel? Will you contribute to society? Will you pursue pure hedonism? Will you read all the literature you never had time for? Will you reconnect with the kids? Make art or music? Make genuine friends instead of just work friends and country club status jockeys? Until you have a purpose, you might as well stay at work (I collect stock market returns from your megacorp, so thanks for your service) :)).
8) To retire early or not is a choice. You have 2 major risks that you can address:
a) Health. Get a checkup, order some diagnostic labs, stop eating the deadly Standard American Diet, and start exercising.
b) Divorce. Start seeing a counselor even if you don't think you need one. Surface any differences in values as you both navigate a shift in lifestyle and values. The counselor might be free while you have insurance through work. Don't wait for the conflict to happen. Manage it.
