Author Topic: Fertility clinics and costs  (Read 25112 times)

frugalnacho

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Fertility clinics and costs
« on: November 03, 2014, 11:20:04 AM »
The wife and I have been trying for about 14 months to conceive, unsuccessfully.  We made some appointments with the doctors and have had some preliminary stuff tested, and everything seems fairly normal.  Today we had a consultation with a fertility clinic.  They did an ultrasound and some more blood work on my wife.  Everything seems good, so we are starting our first cycle today.  She is starting the clomid, and sometime in about 2 weeks we will have to go back for the IUI procedure. 

Insurance is going to cover some of the pre screening stuff (I hope - there is a chance they won't cover it, but they probably will.  It's about $600).  Insurance will also cover everything once conception happens.  We are going to be responsible for about $1200 worth of drugs and procedures though.   If it doesn't take we will have to repeat the cycle again, at a total cost of about $1200 again.  The dr said we might have to repeat 3-4 times, and if it doesn't take by then we will have to reevaluate and check into more expensive options (IVF).

Anyone have any experience with this?

It feels like such a bummer to be swiping the CC for 1k+ charge.  I am glad we are mustachian though and have some money set aside for situations like this, but it still pains me watch that money go.  I really hope we don't have to endure 4 cycles at $1200/each.   I also really hope we don't end up having to spend $15k on IVF.

GizmoTX

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #1 on: November 03, 2014, 12:04:49 PM »
It can be a long & tough road. You'll have to weigh how you feel about spending what could be a great deal of money yet not having a child, vs. regret if you don't try. Or if you are giving up other options to do this.

Our DS ended up costing us $50K over 5 years. Best money we've ever spent.

VirginiaBob

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #2 on: November 03, 2014, 12:23:50 PM »
A lot of clinics have money back guarantee programs where, no baby = 100% refund.   For example, Shady Grove Fertility in the D.C. area has a program like this for IVF.  You need to be accepted into the program though.  If you are below 35, acceptance is pretty much a given.

GuitarStv

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #3 on: November 03, 2014, 12:45:43 PM »
Is adoption completely out of the question?

frugalnacho

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #4 on: November 03, 2014, 12:50:17 PM »
Is adoption completely out of the question?

We would both prefer to have our own biologically, and as far as we can tell there is no good medical reason why we can't/haven't done it yet.  We will probably check into it down the road if we aren't successful.

GuitarStv

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #5 on: November 03, 2014, 12:51:50 PM »
It might be worth setting a budget as a cutoff point for fertility treatments.

frugalnacho

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #6 on: November 03, 2014, 12:58:31 PM »
We have enough money in taxable accounts to cover 4 rounds of IUI, and at least one round of IVF, although I don't know if I would be comfortable spending that much.  So far that is pretty much our limit, because that is all the money we have access to.  Of course this might take a couple years, and we will be earning more money in the meantime, so a budget is probably in order.

Wile E. Coyote

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #7 on: November 03, 2014, 01:37:10 PM »
Have you looked into other insurance options.  Some insurance plans will cover a large portion of fertility treatments, and it can take several.  Best of luck!

chicagomeg

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #8 on: November 03, 2014, 01:39:43 PM »
Move to Illinois, where all fertility treatments are covered? That's my best financial advice. Sorry you have to deal with this. I'm sure it's emotionally and financially frustrating.

frugalnacho

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #9 on: November 03, 2014, 01:51:45 PM »
Have you looked into other insurance options.  Some insurance plans will cover a large portion of fertility treatments, and it can take several.  Best of luck!

I think i'm stuck with my insurance, and they don't cover fertility.  Many of the related things (blood screens, ultrasounds, fertility drugs) are covered though, just not the actual procedures.  I checked around the internet and did a lot of research before we got into this.  I'm not really looking for anyone to solve any specific problems, but it's obviously on my mind now (and probably for several more months at least), and just wanted to start a discussion amongst like minded individuals.  This forum seems to be populated with intelligent and thoughtful people, more so than any other forum i've ever been on.

Move to Illinois, where all fertility treatments are covered? That's my best financial advice. Sorry you have to deal with this. I'm sure it's emotionally and financially frustrating.

I'm sure the costs associated with moving would exceed the cost of fertility treatments.  I mean if a realtor eats up 6% of the price of a house in fees, and we have to sell and buy a house that alone would be enough to offset the costs, and that doesn't include the hassle factor of finding another job, and everything else.  Plus who would I get to babysit for free if we move away from our families?

If we do move it will probably be to some place down south that is warm and sunny.  Still a huge hassle, but so is dealing with the michigan winters.

jka468

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #10 on: November 03, 2014, 02:03:57 PM »
Have you had blood work yourself? Low T? Low viable sperm cell count? Anything out of the ordinary?

frugalnacho

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #11 on: November 03, 2014, 02:12:44 PM »
Have you had blood work yourself? Low T? Low viable sperm cell count? Anything out of the ordinary?

The only thing out of the ordinary with me is the sperm morphology which was around 4% (using kruger strict morphology).  Some docs said that was low, others said it was borderline, and others said it was fine.  My research on the internet leads me to believe it borderline, but barring any other issues I should have has success by now, especially considering every other factor was above normal (volume, concentration, total count, vitality).

RunHappy

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #12 on: November 03, 2014, 02:16:37 PM »
Depending on where in Michigan you live (I didn't look it up), going to Canada for the treatments might be an option.  The treatments there typically cost half of what they do in the US.

A friend of mine did this several years ago, they were willing to do the treatments but only up to a specific dollar amount.  For them the first cycle worked, but I also understand that is not the norm.

Thegoblinchief

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #13 on: November 03, 2014, 02:18:48 PM »
I don't know much about length of trying to conception, but 14 months doesn't seem like a long enough amount of time to shell out $$$$ unless you were already doing ovulation testing and making sure you were just pounding away every day during that part of the cycle.

Then again, NOT trying to rub it in, but my wife and I had the opposite problem, where we were so fertile that we had some oops babies before finding a BC method that (knock on wood) seems to work without taking any semi-permanent measures. So take any advice from me with a grain of salt!

frugalnacho

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #14 on: November 03, 2014, 02:28:50 PM »
I don't know much about length of trying to conception, but 14 months doesn't seem like a long enough amount of time to shell out $$$$ unless you were already doing ovulation testing and making sure you were just pounding away every day during that part of the cycle.

Then again, NOT trying to rub it in, but my wife and I had the opposite problem, where we were so fertile that we had some oops babies before finding a BC method that (knock on wood) seems to work without taking any semi-permanent measures. So take any advice from me with a grain of salt!

We are both young and fairly healthy, and she has been ovulation testing and getting a good results almost every month (she tried the temperature method for the first 6 months or so, then switched to ovulation test kits that detect the hormone in urine).  We have been having sex every other day, so we have for sure hit her in her cycle every month that entire time.  In retrospect it's been a pretty good year.  The recommendation for couples under 35 is to try naturally for a year, and if it doesn't happen after a year you should seek out a fertility specialist to rule out any problems.  So far we haven't identified any problems.  Shelling out the big $$$ is still several months away at the earliest.  Although shelling out $1200 isn't exactly "little $$$" either.

NewbieFrugalUK

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #15 on: November 03, 2014, 02:59:48 PM »
Tbh to those people who have not been in this situation,  it's easy to say '14 months is not a long time, keep trying'. Trust me,  if you have been actively trying for 14 months,  it's a looong time! No advice re insurance, just sending you good luck wishes,  frugalnacho,  and if you are that way inclined, try acupuncture!  Worked for us :)

projekt

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #16 on: November 03, 2014, 03:00:39 PM »
Also make sure you consider nutrition, perhaps seeing a dietitian. This seems to be overlooked sometimes.

jelody

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #17 on: November 03, 2014, 03:15:26 PM »
I've been there OP....DH and I have been trying to conceive for the past three years. Started trying right after I turned 31. Started seeking outside help around the 1.5 year mark and did all the usual testing but doctors couldn't find anything wrong. Diagnosed with unexplained infertility. After doing lots of research, decided to jump right into IVF rather than doing the clomid/IUI route first. I have heard of IUI working for some couples but apparently the success rate is much lower than one round of IVF and I didn't want to shell out 8K for three failed cycles of IUI and then have to dump another 15K into IVF.

During the stimulation part of IVF, doctors found out I have endometriosis which they believe is the cause of my infertility. Froze all my embryos and had surgery to remove endometrioma from my ovaries. We have no insurance coverage for fertility issues and have paid 20K cash so far this year, for the fertility workup, IVF and surgery. Ouch.  Planning to transfer some frozen embryos shortly and fingers crossed that it works or else we're looking at paying another 15K for another IVF cycle. It blows but we do want children and I would rather pay for 1-2 cycles of IVF now than delay until I'm well into my mid-30s and have to pay for even more cycles of IVF due to declining ovarian reserve. My clinic has a program where if you pay for 2 cycles, the 3rd is free (excluding the meds, which cost 3-5K).

I know that 14 months can seem a little worrisome, but I've had friends get pregnant naturally after trying for 1.5 years on up to 4 years. In some of those cases, the wife started working out religiously and started eating super healthy and then got pregnant. Hopefully IUI will work for you but if it doesn't, maybe your wife can try those lifestyle changes and you guys can try naturally for another year or two before contemplating more drastic/expensive measures. Especially if your wife's ovarian reserve is good (measured by blood tests) and she is relatively young. Good luck to you!

La Bibliotecaria Feroz

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #18 on: November 03, 2014, 03:28:38 PM »
My experiences:

1. I couldn't afford treatment when we hit the 1-year mark, so we gave it a little longer. Conceived after 18 months of active trying (charts, Robitussin, etc). I did have blood tests, which didn't show much. I was offered Clomid but I wasn't sure I was ready to step on the whole conveyor belt--I read somewhere that Clomid is the "gateway fertility drug" that gets you started on the whole thing. Once I got pregnant with Big Brother, everything fell into place. Baby #2 was an accident and we wound up with two sixteen months apart. Interestingly, when I did finally get pregnant the first time, I had recently started working in an office with a dozen other women of childbearing age, three of whom were already pregnant with a total of four babies.

2. Have you guys read Taking Charge of Your Fertility? It will help you time any procedures, tests, etc. most effectively so you get the most bang for your buck.

3. Newsweek did this fertility diet article several years ago that I found helpful. The Cliff notes are plant protein = good, skim milk = bad, whole milk = good, etc.

I know this sucks and I hope it ends soon in a healthy pregnancy and baby. When the baby arrives, you will probably wonder for the first few weeks if spending all that money and effort was a horrible mistake, but it gets better :-).

LouisPritchard

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #19 on: November 03, 2014, 03:46:26 PM »
It took us about 3 or 4 years. We had all the tests, failed IUIs etc.. They even had me on clomid (yes they use clomid on men as well) and it was miserable. About 6 months or so before we conceived we dropped the drugs, IUIs, cleaned up our diets, lost a bunch of weight etc.. and it happened naturally. We were looking into adoption as I wasn't willing to spend 15K on IVI with no guarantee of it working. If you can find a clinic that is willing to refund the money if it doesn't work, that might be a option.

You might try alternative medicine as well, I know of one couple that had success with acupuncture. The "healer" said it was something abut their PH levels being different (One person was acidic and the other was alkaline or some such mumbo jumbo), poked them with some needles and they conceived within a couple months. I'm skeptical at best of that stuff but figure for the $100 it was a bargain, since it worked for them.

primalnuke

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #20 on: November 03, 2014, 07:06:54 PM »
We used IVF to conceive our first son.  Luckily we live in IL and it was covered under my insurance. But, I think the cost per cycle for those paying cash was around 10 grand (including the drugs).

Before IVF I tried Clomid for 3 cycles with no ovulation.  Skipped IUI and went right onto IVF.  The first transfer did not take, but I froze 3 embryos and transferred 2 of them 2 months later and got knocked up with 1 baby. 

Remember frozen cycles are MUCH cheaper.  No expensive drugs, no egg retrieval and no paying an embryologist to "make" the embryos.

I personally would not try IUI for more than 1 or two cycles.  If it's not taking, there could be a problem with egg quality or your egg lining is too thick to let the sperm penetrate.  In IVF they often will just inject a sperm right into the egg.  In IVF they also monitor the embryos for 3-5 days and they choose the best looking ones to implant and freeze.

Unexplained infertility is one of the hardest things to deal with.  There is just so many things it could be and the only way to figure it out is through trial and error and expensive testing. 

On a positive note, after my son was born I adopted a primal/paleo lifestyle. I got healthy.  And our second cycle of not-preventing pregnancy I got knocked up naturally.  #2 will be arriving in March.   So obviously I recommend looking into this lifestyle.


johnintaiwan

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #21 on: November 03, 2014, 07:14:32 PM »
The wife and I recently received some bad news ourselves. Just stopping by to wish you luck. Hopefully there will be a new mustache here int he future.

whiskeyjack

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #22 on: November 03, 2014, 07:31:34 PM »
I know that 14 months feels like forever but statistically it's not *that* much of an outlier so try not to panic yet.   We tried unsuccessfully for close to 3 years.  After extensive testing that didn't turn up anything interesting we did 3 cycles of clomid around age 30 but then got pregnant on an 'off' month without it.   Since then we've gone on to have 2 more without difficulty despite being older.


iris lily

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #23 on: November 03, 2014, 07:52:12 PM »
Really, $1,200 a pop and this seems expensive to you?

I heard that fertility treatments were wicked expensive. A PP seems to confirm that. I suppose it matters what kind of treatments one is having, of course. But even then, $1,200 is peanuts even if you use a couple of those pops.

I paid a lot more than that for my dog's treatment last year. He's my baby. Someone, an idiot, paid more than $1,000 for himas a puppy to a breeder but then turned him into rescue due to his health problems. I'm the next idiot who fell in love with him and wants him in my family. This is for a dog.

Dude, get some perspective.

VirginiaBob

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #24 on: November 03, 2014, 07:59:21 PM »
We tried for 6 years, then went clomid, diet and herbal, witch doctors, sold soul (just kidding on last 2) iui for 2 cycles, ivf's at 2 different clinics.   All in all, it cost us about $60k out of pocket including meds and travel expense, and even worse is the years of emotional pain.   Just as an FYI - a lot of fertility clinics are money grabbing machines.  Let's try this, nope that didn't work, please give us another $3k and let's try again.  uh-oh that didn't work, that's ok, fork over another $12k.  Oh we'll, that didn't work, but we'll give you a discount to try again for only $10k - didn't work again, oh we have another medical breakthrough so give us $14k - oops didn't work, etc. etc. 

In the end, we ended up traveling 3 hours twice a week to a clinic that offered the 100% guarantee.  Once they know that they have to give you a refund if it doesn't work, worked right away, no problems.  That one egg retrieval session resulted in 7 high quality embryos and 3 kids (a singleton and twins) and we still have 2 frozen, which we plan to use.

After the tax deductions, we really only spent $52.5k, and it was spread over 3 years and we just paid as we went (had a bunch of savings to fall back on if we needed it, but never dipped into it anyways).

Money well spent, but my advice is to go with a 100% guarantee clinic right from the start to save lots of money, time, and your sanity. 
« Last Edit: November 04, 2014, 05:10:30 AM by VirginiaBob »

vivian

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #25 on: November 03, 2014, 09:18:37 PM »
In my experience, it is typical for insurance to cover diagnosis, but not treatment for infertility. Although there are some states that require it to be covered. Your emotions are likely running high through this process. Therefore, it can be really hard to think logically and critically about the choices in front of you. I would suggest that before you start down a particular road, decide how many cycles you will/can afford to try and keep to that agreement. For example, if  you two say you can do 3 cycles of IUI, it can be really tempting to go for that 4th cycle because your emotions are high. I do think it is possible to spend money on these things while being mustachian, but make these decisions when you are in a relatively balanced place emotionally/mentally, and not during the pain of another failed cycle.

Also keep in mind that while the fertility clinic wants to be successful and get you pregnant, their weighing of the statistics may be different from what side you are on. By this I mean, there are people who get pregnant on that 4th or 5th cycle of the same treatment, but typically if it is going to work for  you, it's going to happen within the first 2-3 cycles. Since you have unexplained infertility, it's hard for them to tell you the success rate for your situation specifically.

geekette

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #26 on: November 03, 2014, 09:24:26 PM »
We did three years on the fertility treadmill.  Dreadful.  After 4 losses, Clomid, IUIs, IVFs, we just couldn't take the freakin' roller coaster anymore and bailed on our third planned IVF cycle.  No kids, and we're fine with it now, although it took a while to get to that point.

I guess that's just to say that most times, either way, you'll be okay.  No kids does make FIRE a bit easier, if that's any consolation...

Elisabeth

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #27 on: November 04, 2014, 04:30:37 AM »
Amy Klein wrote a number of pieces in NY Times and elsewhere on her fertility roller coaster. She has a few recommendations for people just beginning the journey - things she wishes she'd done differently because they were time wasters. Might want to look up some of her info, just for another perspective.

TomTX

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #28 on: November 04, 2014, 06:34:03 AM »
Couple of items:

Clomid (generic)  was cheapest @ Costco,  cheaper than my copay.

Clomid does work on guys. It convinces your body to produce more testosterone. According to my endocrinologist,  it can be used to 'reset' testosterone production with initial use, then taper off.

After a testicular cyst my production was low. Clomid brought it right back up, and 3 months into the 6 month taper, it is still great.  This is a well accepted (if off label) method.

AllChoptUp

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #29 on: November 04, 2014, 08:00:09 AM »
IVF veteran...rough breakdown of costs:

Stimulation & egg retrieval: $15K
TESA & ICSI: $2K

Fresh round was a no.  We were able to freeze a number of embryos, however.

Frozen round 1 (no pregnancy): $6K
Frozen round 2 (nope): $6k
Frozen round 3 (YES! Baby boy!): $6K
Frozen round 4 (another one please?...nope): $7K (a few years later)
Frozen round 5 (sorry): $7K

So $35K for one wonderful child and $14K trying for a second baby.  Same as many people spend on a fancy car.  We don't regret a single penny.

VirginiaBob

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #30 on: November 04, 2014, 08:05:10 AM »
For comparison purposes, adoption of babies usually costs upwards of $50,000, with no guarantees that you actually get the baby.  So for those who say "you are crazy to spend some much on fertility treatments, just adopt", it typically isn't free either.

frugalnacho

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #31 on: November 04, 2014, 08:06:26 AM »
Really, $1,200 a pop and this seems expensive to you?

I heard that fertility treatments were wicked expensive. A PP seems to confirm that. I suppose it matters what kind of treatments one is having, of course. But even then, $1,200 is peanuts even if you use a couple of those pops.

I paid a lot more than that for my dog's treatment last year. He's my baby. Someone, an idiot, paid more than $1,000 for himas a puppy to a breeder but then turned him into rescue due to his health problems. I'm the next idiot who fell in love with him and wants him in my family. This is for a dog.

Dude, get some perspective.

What planet do you live on that $1,200 is peanuts?  That's several weeks worth of work.  Or two months worth of mortgage payments.  Or if my calculations are correct about 4,500 lbs of actual peanuts, which is more peanuts than I will consume in my life time even though I eat peanut butter every week.

And there is a good possibility of spending that again...and again, and then even more on IVF treatment in addition to the drugs and other costs we've incurred. 

I definitely have perspective on the cost, and although it hasn't reached astronomical levels, or levels that will seriously affect our FIRE date yet, it still isn't peanuts.

bogart

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #32 on: November 04, 2014, 11:20:18 AM »
I'm sorry you're finding yourself needing to start navigating this.  I hope your experience of the world of infertility treatments will be short, simple, and effective.

I'm a mom after IVF (cycle 4) that was needed due to my husband's vasectomy (and failed reversal).  Like you (though our situation was better defined and to some extent, anticipated -- we knew we needed to jump straight to IVF and that "just relaxing" or "giving it more time" wasn't going to help, but we also had NO IDEA starting out what a difficult time we *would* have), I started this process staring those dollar figures in the face and thinking there was no way.

I ended up spending far more than I'd have anticipated, and going into debt to do it.  The only thing I regret is not spending more earlier -- time is not kind to female fertility (I was 34 at our first IVF cycle, 37 when our son was conceived).  Of course, that's easy to say given that it did eventually work, but the guide that worked for me was asking myself each time, "If I try this and it doesn't work, will I regret having tried it?"  Each time the answer was no, so each time I proceeded (I quit when that was no longer true -- not IVF attempt 4, but IVF attempt 6, as I'd hoped to have 2 kids.  Even now, if anything, I wish I'd tried longer, not stopped sooner.  But mostly, that I'd been willing to spend more earlier.  Though, again, we knew we had to use IVF, so the "hoping to get lucky" strategy was off the table for us.  Not really a blessing, but it did simplify decision-making.).

If you decide to explore the money-back options that others have mentioned (which apply to IVF, not IUI), pay close attention to what they require.  They may, for example, require you not to take more than a certain amount of time "off" between multiple cycles (again, time is fertility, for women, and not in a good way), if more than one is needed, and/or have rules about when you must use frozen embryos (if you have any available from earlier cycles) versus proceeding with a fresh cycle.  All these decisions are deeply personal, so you may not want the rules of a financing program to be the one deciding them for you.  And while clearly the goal is "birth of a healthy full-term baby," it turns out that "making sure I get pregnant" and "making sure I have a healthy baby" are not always the same thing -- for example, US fertility clinics have very high multiple-pregnancy (twins and higher) rates, not to downplay the joy of twins, but even twins are much higher risk, including of really bad things like miscarriage, than singleton pregnancies.  You want to be in a position to be the ones making decisions based on your own circumstances, goals, and history, not to be pressured into transferring "one more" to increase your chance of achieving a pregnancy -- though in all honesty, this can be difficult to do (make sensible decisions) regardless.

I have no real words of wisdom or strategies beyond those.  The "will I regret having tried this if it doesn't work?" question was a very useful one, for me.  I wish you and your wife luck.  There are very good online support forums; if you'd like to be pointed toward some, please PM me.

goodlife

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #33 on: November 05, 2014, 01:35:28 AM »
So this is not my personal experience and I don't want to sound like I know what it feels like to be in this situation because I do not, but I thought I would share this story of a close friend of mine anyway. She and her husband tried for about 1.5 years to to get pregnant and it didn't work. Then they went through fertility treatments (like you, there was nothing wrong with either of them as far as all the tests showed and they were in their early thirties). They shelled out a lot of money. Like a real lot. She never told me the exact figure, but I know it was something between 30-50k. After 2 years (approx I think), still nothing. So they gave up (mostly because they ran out of money) and started the adoption process (which can take a while). Around 9 months after they gave up trying, she got pregnant all on her own and they have two (biological) children by now. She really regrets spending all that money. And she said she did some research after the fact and thinks there could have been a psychological component to not getting pregnant earlier which she never thought about at the time, like the fact that they were trying so hard created a lot of stress on both of them and once they just gave up trying so hard, it just happened. I am not a doctor or psychologist or anything and maybe this is a load of bull, but thought I would share this story anyway.

AllChoptUp

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #34 on: November 05, 2014, 11:13:29 AM »
Bogart, we're living parallel lives here.  So glad #4 worked for you! 

We took the same, "would I regret not trying?" view of things, and looking back it was the right way to make these decisions.

VirginiaBob

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #35 on: November 05, 2014, 11:24:52 AM »
Bogart, we're living parallel lives here.  So glad #4 worked for you! 

We took the same, "would I regret not trying?" view of things, and looking back it was the right way to make these decisions.

That is kind of the way we looked at it too.  We told ourselves that  20 years down the road, at 50+ years old and still childless, we would look back and regret it if we did not at least try.  But if we tried, even with the financial costs, we would have no regrets.

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #36 on: November 05, 2014, 02:35:24 PM »
We adopted without ever trying because it was something we wanted to do, but in the process we met a lot of people suffering from infertility.  It was common advice in the adoption world that after a infertile couple adopted a child, they should be sure to use birth control after the adoption if they did not want another because adoption had a way of "curing" infertility.  Several possible reasons for this: Adopting our children triggered hormonal changes in my wife, I could see where this may make a woman more receptive, and I can also imagine a couple "chilling out" a bit in the bedroom after having their parental desires satisfied, both in terms of frequency and mood.  Sounds like you and your wife are already on down the road with the fertility treatments, but I would suggest two things: If your wife is not spending time with other pregnant women or babies, see if there is a way to bring them together and on the "off" months just chill out (the ER crowd is a little high strung, myself included) and make love when you want to.  I'm no expert, but if getting pregnant is already difficult at 31, it is probably not going to get much harder by 33 or 34.

Good luck, and if you do eventually decide to adopt (there are some nice tax credits!) be sure to shoot me a PM.         

Le0

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #37 on: November 05, 2014, 03:13:28 PM »
Billings Method. Look into it. Free natural and can often explain some of the reasons you can't normally conceive.

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iris lily

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #38 on: November 05, 2014, 05:18:26 PM »

...And there is a good possibility of spending that again...and again, and then even more on IVF treatment in addition to the drugs and other costs we've incurred. 


To me, this is the problem.

$1,200 for a healthy baby seems hardly anything given the immense value it brings to your life.

I guess we will have to differ on what we value for the money, then.

(spoken as someone who didn't have children by choice)

frugalnacho

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #39 on: November 05, 2014, 05:41:47 PM »

...And there is a good possibility of spending that again...and again, and then even more on IVF treatment in addition to the drugs and other costs we've incurred. 


To me, this is the problem.

$1,200 for a healthy baby seems hardly anything given the immense value it brings to your life.

I guess we will have to differ on what we value for the money, then.

(spoken as someone who didn't have children by choice)

$1,200 for a healthy baby would be a bargain, and I hope it works, but the problem is there is only an 8-10% chance of conception.  And that assumes we are normal.  We may in fact be totally infertile and the drs can't tell.   There is plenty of anecdotal evidence in this thread of people spending in excess of $50k on fertility treatments.

VirginiaBob

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #40 on: November 05, 2014, 05:58:26 PM »

...And there is a good possibility of spending that again...and again, and then even more on IVF treatment in addition to the drugs and other costs we've incurred. 


To me, this is the problem.

$1,200 for a healthy baby seems hardly anything given the immense value it brings to your life.

I guess we will have to differ on what we value for the money, then.

(spoken as someone who didn't have children by choice)

$1,200 for a healthy baby would be a bargain, and I hope it works, but the problem is there is only an 8-10% chance of conception.  And that assumes we are normal.  We may in fact be totally infertile and the drs can't tell.   There is plenty of anecdotal evidence in this thread of people spending in excess of $50k on fertility treatments.

If anything, I'd get a 2nd opinion on the IUI option.  Everyone I know who went down that path spent a bunch of money and wasted a lot of time, and then ended up IVF anyways.  I highly recommend the refund 100% guarantee programs.

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #41 on: November 05, 2014, 06:01:45 PM »
Awwww, I feel for you :(

We it took us 2 years after very seriously trying before conceiving.   We had unexplained fertility and standard testing (semen analysis, HSG, bloodwork, etc) showed nothing.   I went on three months of clomid just in case it helped, and it did not.   We had an appointment at a fertility clinic to start IUI, when I finally got pregnant (did nothing different than all the months before) with our now 3 year old daughter.

I know how hard it can be, and my best suggestion is to take it one step at a time before worrying about IVF (also consider looking into adoption before deciding for sure on IVF).   But, if it comes to it and you have the cash, looking at my DD, I'd not have regretted spending it to get her.   
« Last Edit: November 05, 2014, 06:04:52 PM by Emilyngh »

JoJoJo

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #42 on: November 05, 2014, 07:03:26 PM »
One more anecdote, plus my sympathy and best wishes:

I was a bit older when we started trying, so we went for tests after only six months, which luckily was covered even by our high deductible plan. By the time it was all done a few months later (I dawdled due to stress and depression I think), they recommended what I believe was the usual Clomid procedure, and I balked at the out of pocket costs.  It turns out the drug itself was very cheap and covered by insurance, but the other stuff was where the cost and most of the risk of twins (a big fear for me) came from.

So even though our doctor said we were wasting precious time, we decided to try it the cheap way first. Right around that time a big source of my stress decreased as well- We lived in a duplex, and our downstairs neighbor/tenant was routinely rude and difficult. I found it hard to put her out of my mind when trying to conceive- and then she gave her notice and finally moved out.

With a bit of mental space plus that one course of Clomid alone, we conceived our (first) beautiful little girl!

I hope this helps! Good luck!!

flamingo25

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #43 on: November 05, 2014, 07:12:29 PM »
I don't have anything to add, but I'm sorry you're dealing with such a difficult situation.

We've had fertility troubles too. Our problem is that I can get pregnant, but can't stay pregnant. After 4+ miscarriages, we decided to move onto adoption (not saying you should do this, just our personal decision).

I understand how infuriating it is to be looking at thousands or tens of thousands of dollars to have a baby when other people can just get drunk by the fireplace and pop one out 9 months later.

Best of luck with however you choose to proceed. You have my thoughts.

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #44 on: November 05, 2014, 07:32:26 PM »
First off, good luck with your journey to parenthood. And I know from personal experience that IUI can be effective after years of trying the "cheap and fun way". My wife and I were lucky that our insurance covered the diagnostic testing (HSG, hormonal testing, semen analysis, etc.), and everything checked out normal, but we were on our own for further treatments. The testing did reveal that my wife had slight hypothyroidism, which may have been complicating our efforts. On our second round of IUI with Clomid, we were successful, and my wife is currently 18 weeks pregnant as a result. The IUI was around $500 per attempt. Our fertility doc stated that the success rate was about 10-15% per attempt and that after 3 failed attempts, a couple should move onto IVF, especially if the woman is 35 or older.

So, I recommend that you strongly consider the IUI routine if your physician recommends it. Most importantly, find a fertility clinic and physician that you can trust and that will be upfront with the success rates and help you with a cost/benefit analysis. Also getting yourself and spouse in the best physical shape possible (cutting down on alcohol, eating better, exercising) can only help your efforts.

Best of luck!

frugalnacho

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #45 on: November 14, 2014, 10:08:40 AM »
Wife got the dye test done and shows her right tube may potentially be blocked.  Dr says even though the dye didn't go into the right tube, it doesn't look like a typical blocked tube, but we are going to treat it as such anyway.  So we went in for an ultrasound today but all the eggs are on the right side, so we are going to just try the natural way and go back in next month to check again. 

frugalnacho

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #46 on: January 02, 2015, 09:10:42 AM »
So we went back the following month and the eggs were on the left side, so we did the IUI and got pregnant! We are about 5 weeks along right now and haven't told anyone.   Most of the medical stuff being done (ultra sounds, blood tests, etc) are not part of the cost of the IUI and were not covered by insurance.  Insurance adjusted the rates down to the negotiated rate that they pay, but then sent the bill to us.  All in all we have had about $3,000 in expenses and I expect a few more small bills to roll in for the last couple visits.  I think insurance should start picking up the tab now that we are officially pregnant.  It just rolled over to 2015 though, so our deductible reset so i'm sure we will have to pay that again.  I anticipate paying the max out of pocket on our insurance plan this year.

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #47 on: January 02, 2015, 10:11:02 AM »
Congratulations!  I hope everything goes well!  Keep us posted!

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #48 on: January 02, 2015, 12:11:33 PM »
Congratulations!  I hope everything goes smoothly.

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Re: Fertility clinics and costs
« Reply #49 on: January 02, 2015, 12:24:28 PM »
Just want to let you know you cracked me up comparing to the *actual* cost of peanuts. 

 

Wow, a phone plan for fifteen bucks!