Author Topic: Epic FU money stories  (Read 1501019 times)

ducky19

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1150 on: August 19, 2016, 11:55:12 AM »
That I don't know, but since the rest of the letter seemed legit I would guess that he does. I realize this isn't your typical FU money story, although I like to think that he had a big enough 'stache that he can live out the rest of his days in comfort.

G-dog

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1151 on: August 19, 2016, 11:59:36 AM »
Oh Ducky19, we have to get this guy some great booze to enjoy!  EPIC! Totally motherfucking epic!

I'll chip in on some booze - I am serious, PM me

CowboyAndIndian

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1152 on: August 19, 2016, 12:12:19 PM »
Oh Ducky19, we have to get this guy some great booze to enjoy!  EPIC! Totally motherfucking epic!

I'll chip in on some booze - I am serious, PM me

+100

Absoutely. I will chip in too!

Hvillian

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1153 on: August 19, 2016, 12:13:28 PM »
That... was... epic.

Does he actually have brain cancer? :(
Exactly.  Epic, then, um . . . brain cancer.  Ah shit.

ducky19

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1154 on: August 19, 2016, 12:17:22 PM »
I don't know the guy personally (huge company), otherwise I'd have already bought him a bottle. This was just forwarded to me by a friend.

G-dog

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1155 on: August 19, 2016, 12:18:16 PM »
Contact the friend that the Internet hordes are feeling generous!

dividendman

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1156 on: August 19, 2016, 12:19:39 PM »
Wow, amazing.

ducky19

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1157 on: August 19, 2016, 12:34:02 PM »
Contact the friend that the Internet hordes are feeling generous!

It was already a third generation forward by the time he got it - it's kind of satisfying though that such an epic email is spreading like wildfire through a company of this size. I hope it inspires others to stop and consider their options. I know it has for me!

zephyr911

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1158 on: August 19, 2016, 03:17:14 PM »
Sweet Jesus that was epick. 99 points out of 100. (-1 because intergenerational shit-talk is beneath such a badass)

arebelspy

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1159 on: August 19, 2016, 03:55:35 PM »
That was pretty good, thanks for sharing!
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okits

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1160 on: August 19, 2016, 11:43:50 PM »
As someone too strategic diplomatic meek ruled by my Inner Bag Lady to burn a bridge, that was cathartic.  Thanks for posting.

Metric Mouse

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1161 on: August 20, 2016, 12:09:37 PM »
As someone too strategic diplomatic meek ruled by my Inner Bag Lady to burn a bridge, that was cathartic.  Thanks for posting.

Nice.

Libertea

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1162 on: August 20, 2016, 06:17:15 PM »
Didn't post here yet because it's taken me this long to get through all of the rest of your posts (skipping all the weird computer geek speak posts that I don't understand anyway, lol).  Here's my FU story.

Not long after getting out of college, I was working at a job that I liked with people I liked, except for the boss.  (Wow, how many stories here start out that way?)  We'll call him Bob.  Bob was a big bully.  Unfortunately for most of my coworkers, they weren't American citizens, and so basically if Bob fired them, they'd lose their work visas, and back to their home countries they'd have to go.  I, on the other hand, was and am an American citizen.  So on the day when I'd finally had enough of Bob and his bullying ways/unreasonable demands, I went to his office, told him that slavery was outlawed in this country in 1865, and I quit.  Bob was kind of sick of me by that point anyway, so I don't think he really cared all that much, except that I had also gotten one of my (non-American) coworkers riled up about how Bob was treating him.  Bob basically told my friend to go back home, because he (Bob) didn't care if he (my friend) got deported. 

I had no new job lined up at that point, but I didn't really care for myself.  I was young at the time (mid 20s), and I knew I could go stay with my family for a few months until I got a new job.  But there was no way I was going to let my friend get deported.  Nor was letting him go crawling back to Bob an acceptable outcome to me, either.  Bob was making overtures to my friend, telling my friend that if he basically agreed to toe the line, Bob would take him back and my friend wouldn't have to be deported back to his home country.  My friend, unsurprisingly, was scared and ready to cave.

Given this situation, it lit a fire (pun intended) under my butt.  I grabbed my friend, forbade him to go back to work for Bob, and started dragging him to talk to other bosses at the same company.  The two of us got new jobs with another group by the end of the day, and my friend did not have to go crawling back to Bob or go back to his home country because of losing his visa.  The new work group wound up being awesome for both my friend and me; we both liked our new boss way better than Bob.  Everyone in the whole place was talking about how all of Bob's employees were jumping ship.  (After my friend and I left, one other employee of his also changed groups.)

I still ran into Bob occasionally afterward, and he and I would always be syrupy sweet to each other.  But I heard through the grapevine that Bob was pretty pissed about me getting my friend out of his (Bob's) clutches.  Like I said, I don't think Bob cared about losing me from his group, but he was not happy about losing my friend.  I, on the other hand, feel like saving my friend from Bob is one of the top five things I've done in my lifetime that really helped someone/made a difference in their life.  And while I won't deny being glad that it pissed Bob off, I'm more proud of the fact that I stopped him (Bob) from abusing my friend and ruining his (my friend's) life.

FWIW, my friend now has a green card and is married with a child, working for a different company and in no danger of being deported by a bad boss. :-)

arebelspy

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1163 on: August 20, 2016, 06:48:26 PM »
Way to go Libertea!  That's a good story.
We are two former teachers who accumulated a bunch of real estate, retired at 29, spent some time traveling the world full time and are now settled with three kids.
If you want to know more about us, or how we did that, or see lots of pictures, this Business Insider profile tells our story pretty well.
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Paul der Krake

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1164 on: August 20, 2016, 07:07:58 PM »
There is a special place in hell for bosses who leverage work papers for submission.

LeRainDrop

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1165 on: August 20, 2016, 07:37:27 PM »
Way to go, Libertea!  It really is awesome that you stepped up for your friend in that situation.  Bob can go to hell.

jlajr

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1166 on: August 20, 2016, 10:45:14 PM »
I don't know if I mentioned this on this thread before, but I find it incredible that some people - managers and colleagues - behave or speak at work in a way that they would, presumably, not behave or speak outside of work.

For better or worse, I guess I have difficulty adapting my behavior or speech to circumstances. If someone I meet (outside work) is an ass or we simply don't get along, I likely wouldn't become friends with that person. Similarly, why should I work for someone who is an ass or with whom I don't get along?

Libertea

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1167 on: August 21, 2016, 12:12:56 AM »
There is a special place in hell for bosses who leverage work papers for submission.
Agree.  I wasn't really all that angry for myself, because I had the option to walk away from the job at any time with no repercussions besides financial repercussions since I'm a citizen.  I was fed up enough to be fine with the idea of quitting and just drifting for a bit.  But I did get angry about the injustice of how being fired for challenging Bob would affect my non-citizen friend.  So in a way, he (my friend) helped me too, because I would not have been nearly as motivated to look for a new position right away if I hadn't been worried for what would happen to my friend.  Plus, my friend is one of those totally laid back nice guys that everyone likes.  He worked hard and wasn't a troublemaker like me.  He definitely didn't deserve to have Bob treat him like that.

Neustache

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1168 on: August 21, 2016, 06:55:13 AM »
That really puts a dark spin on all the companies trying to hire those with work-visas.  Hadn't thought about how much they could hold over their employees' heads.  Ugh. 

AlanStache

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1169 on: August 22, 2016, 12:17:55 PM »
That really puts a dark spin on all the companies trying to hire those with work-visas.  Hadn't thought about how much they could hold over their employees' heads.  Ugh.

Go have a look at the search results for "bill gates h1b visa".  Would assume things are common similar at other companies.

Not sure I have a good solution but is a messy system.
« Last Edit: August 22, 2016, 12:41:35 PM by AlanStache »

nobodyspecial

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1170 on: August 22, 2016, 12:27:30 PM »
Go have a look at the search results for "bill gates h1b visa".  Would assume things are common at other companies.

Not sure I have a good solution but is a messy system.
It's a brilliant system (*). You get to hire cheap workers who can't complain or move to another job.
You get to use the lower wages as a lever on your other workers and get to complain that you can't find qualified staff.
For really qualified foreign workers you have to open an office in another country, but that's ok because you can use that to avoid tax.

* - assuming you are a major multinational corporation. If you are a small company, a startup, a foreign STEM graduate, or an employee it sucks. But hey if you want change buy your own congressman.

patchyfacialhair

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1171 on: August 23, 2016, 01:35:13 PM »
A professor once brought up the topic of unemployment (it might have been an economics class), and how it can be bad, etc. A student  mentioned how (at the time) 10% unemployment means the world is crashing down. Some other dude/dudette piped up and said "so if 10% unemployment is horrible, that means that out of 30 of us in this class, 27 of us will have jobs. Why are we worried again?"

Ever since then I've had a really passive attitude toward work. I realize that I really don't have to beat too many people to get a job. Sure, my pay might be different for different work, but at the end of the day, I don't see me ever going through an extended period of unemployment. I realize I have normal social skills, look normal, and can do basic math, so I probably don't have much to worry about.

That being said: I've never had to use FU money. We were prepared to do so when my wife was unsure if she'd get a promotion, but she ended up getting the job. The stories on this thread are inspiring.

nobodyspecial

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1172 on: August 23, 2016, 08:33:58 PM »
A professor once brought up the topic of unemployment (it might have been an economics class), and how it can be bad, etc.... that means that out of 30 of us in this class, 27 of us will have jobs. Why are we worried again?"
If you are in a class with a professor, the 10% unemployment rate probably doesn't apply to you anyway.
It's like being told the life expectancy in some famine struck African country

ender

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1173 on: August 23, 2016, 09:11:40 PM »
A professor once brought up the topic of unemployment (it might have been an economics class), and how it can be bad, etc.... that means that out of 30 of us in this class, 27 of us will have jobs. Why are we worried again?"
If you are in a class with a professor, the 10% unemployment rate probably doesn't apply to you anyway.
It's like being told the life expectancy in some famine struck African country

I suspect that graduates with a 4-year degree would be hit disproportionately  hard if unemployment was 10%.


Bikeguy

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1174 on: August 23, 2016, 09:25:40 PM »
A professor once brought up the topic of unemployment (it might have been an economics class), and how it can be bad, etc.... that means that out of 30 of us in this class, 27 of us will have jobs. Why are we worried again?"
If you are in a class with a professor, the 10% unemployment rate probably doesn't apply to you anyway.
It's like being told the life expectancy in some famine struck African country

I suspect that graduates with a 4-year degree would be hit disproportionately  hard if unemployment was 10%.
In Michigan,  those with high school degrees were hit the hardest.  College degrees were fine.   Grad degrees even better. College degree unemployment rate was lower than overall rate.

JCfire

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1175 on: August 24, 2016, 07:01:29 AM »
A professor once brought up the topic of unemployment (it might have been an economics class), and how it can be bad, etc.... that means that out of 30 of us in this class, 27 of us will have jobs. Why are we worried again?"
If you are in a class with a professor, the 10% unemployment rate probably doesn't apply to you anyway.
It's like being told the life expectancy in some famine struck African country

I suspect that graduates with a 4-year degree would be hit disproportionately  hard if unemployment was 10%.

We don't have explicit data on that, because the highest educational category on the unemployment survey is "Bachelors Degree and Higher".  But when unemployment was 10% back in 2009, unemployment in that category was only 5%.  Way more than half the total people in that category have exactly a bachelor's degree -- masters' and PHDs are a small minority of the group.  So I can safely infer that unemployment among people with a bachelors' degree is generally lower than general population unemployment.

ender

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1176 on: August 24, 2016, 07:26:11 AM »
We don't have explicit data on that, because the highest educational category on the unemployment survey is "Bachelors Degree and Higher".  But when unemployment was 10% back in 2009, unemployment in that category was only 5%.  Way more than half the total people in that category have exactly a bachelor's degree -- masters' and PHDs are a small minority of the group.  So I can safely infer that unemployment among people with a bachelors' degree is generally lower than general population unemployment.

However, the demographic in question is "about to graduate bachelors" students -- not overall bachelors holders.


mtn

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1177 on: August 24, 2016, 07:51:16 AM »
We don't have explicit data on that, because the highest educational category on the unemployment survey is "Bachelors Degree and Higher".  But when unemployment was 10% back in 2009, unemployment in that category was only 5%.  Way more than half the total people in that category have exactly a bachelor's degree -- masters' and PHDs are a small minority of the group.  So I can safely infer that unemployment among people with a bachelors' degree is generally lower than general population unemployment.

However, the demographic in question is "about to graduate bachelors" students -- not overall bachelors holders.

I could be wrong here, but don't people who have never held a job (i.e. some about to graduate bachelors students) not count towards the unemployment rate?

patchyfacialhair

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1178 on: August 24, 2016, 08:06:08 AM »
We don't have explicit data on that, because the highest educational category on the unemployment survey is "Bachelors Degree and Higher".  But when unemployment was 10% back in 2009, unemployment in that category was only 5%.  Way more than half the total people in that category have exactly a bachelor's degree -- masters' and PHDs are a small minority of the group.  So I can safely infer that unemployment among people with a bachelors' degree is generally lower than general population unemployment.

However, the demographic in question is "about to graduate bachelors" students -- not overall bachelors holders.

I could be wrong here, but don't people who have never held a job (i.e. some about to graduate bachelors students) not count towards the unemployment rate?

I think it depends on what agency/organization you're asking, depending on the agenda.

And sorry for derailing this thread folks. My rambling story was meant to illustrate that I've always had an FU mindset regarding work, even though I haven't had to use FU money.

Quick, someone post an epic FU money story!

zephyr911

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1179 on: August 24, 2016, 03:03:56 PM »
I, on the other hand, feel like saving my friend from Bob is one of the top five things I've done in my lifetime that really helped someone/made a difference in their life.

I concur, and that's fucking amazing. Hats off to you.

BlueHouse

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1180 on: August 25, 2016, 01:50:26 PM »
Quick, someone post an epic FU money story!

Check back with me later this month.   

aetherie

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1181 on: August 25, 2016, 01:55:24 PM »
Quick, someone post an epic FU money story!

Check back with me later this month.

*grabs popcorn*

Mother Fussbudget

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1182 on: August 25, 2016, 02:48:00 PM »
Recently discovered this thread... and *BOY* do I have a few EPIC FU stories to impart.

Aside:  I never call these idiot managers 'Assholes', because EVERYONE has an asshole, and I have more respect for my asshole than I do for these clowns.  Where would we be if human beings DIDN'T have assholes?  Asshats would be a better term...
But I prefer the term Tina Fey coined:  Asshair.  Everyone has ass-hairs, and NOBODY likes them.

Asshair#1:  Calera (1990)
I was commuting 1.5hrs/day from Fremont to Santa Clara, working 10 hour days as a software test lead on a Windows based Optical Character Recognition program 'TopScan for Windows'.  Scan a printed page, or put a PDF image thru this program, and get a Microsoft Word document.  The character recognition engine was fine - it was the Windows application that needed LOTS of work.  After my team did a 2-day acceptance test, we found enough defects that we determined we would need 3 months of testing (different scanners, printers, etc) to get 'TopScan' into shape for launch.  Asshair VP of Engineering went BALLISTIC, screamed, yelled, profanity laced diatribe... the works. 

BUT... Developers, and my Test Manager in the room all agreed with my team's assessment. 

Finally Asshair said "It has to be done in a month - no flexibility.  Can we do it in 1 month?"  So I came up with a 24/7, 3-shift testing rotation where we would divide the existing test resources into teams, and test around the clock.  Asshair took the plan to the President.  Response comes back that a 24/7 schedule would be too stressful on the team members.  I came back with a 2-shift solution - 6am-3pm, and 3pm-midnight, thus the "Day Hawks" and the "Night Hawks" were born.  We did it - worked around the clock, another test lead handled the morning team, I handled the evening team, and reported up for all teams at EOD (sometimes as late as 3am).  Three weeks later, we're ready to ship.  That plan saved the project, and made TopScan a successful launch.  Let the promotions begin! 

Former Test Manager wanted to become a developer - boom - happily transferred. I was promoted to Test Manager!
Soon after, I got a call from a head-hunter / recruiter who wanted to place me as a Senior Quality Assurance (test) Engineer with a company making a well known presentation graphics program (think 'Harvard Graphics' competitor) - a software giant (SG) based in WA but with a small artsy group in CA.  I said, "Thanks but no thanks".  I was happy with Calera, and wanted to bask in the success.

Then we waited to see if sales would help the company's bottom line. At the same time, we started work on TopScan for Macintosh.  I brought in my personal Macintosh desktop machine to help defer company costs - one less test machine to purchase.  Some, but not as many, problems were found in the acceptance tests, so a shorter test cycle was needed, but before we could really get started, sales results for TopScan for Windows were in, and were not impressive. 

Layoffs would be next.  We would mothball development until end of summer, giving sales a chance to kick in, and bring in revenue. once sales had a chance to pick up.  Asshair said I could only keep only 1 of our 14 contract testers during the layoff period, and could try to hire them back in the fall.  I thought about it, and asked if I could instead put ALL contractors on a part time basis, have 1 person on a mostly full-time basis, and keep 13 of them one-hour a week, or less, just to keep them on the payroll - the idea would save paperwork, and be a way to keep the team available when we needed them in a month or two.  After all, this team had saved the company's bacon, and shipped a high-quality world class product, they deserved more than a kick in the pants, AND we needed their expertise for the upcoming test effort.  The development manager liked the idea, my former manager liked the idea.  Asshair... not so much. 

Two days later, there was an off-site manager meeting held to discuss the upcoming layoffs. 
All my peer managers were invited, but I was *NOT* invited.  The writing was on the wall. 

Soon I was called into Asshair's office, and greeted with:  "As you know, we're having layoffs, and you've been affected".
I was stunned.  I said I would be happy to do whatever was needed, if we needed to layoff the 13 folks, that would be workable, and I'd be happy to help - he said, "Oh, your help won't be needed - that's already happened".   Since I rode the bus to work, I had to ride the bus home, pick up my car, and come BACK to pick-up my personal computer.  During the double-double-commute, I had time to think, and realized that I'd worked my butt off for months only to be shown the door.  ONLY THEN did I realize how overwhelming the work had been for MONTHS.  I needed a break, and was happy for the chance to get my head together.  I had FU money, and a newish economy car - ROAD TRIP?  I started planning a cross-country road-trip that day.  I gathered my stuff, and went home without further incident.

The NEXT MORNING... (can you guess?)

The recruiter for artsy-SG making the world's leading presentation graphics program called me AT HOME, and asked if I might still be interested in the SG job.  I said, yes, but asked how she got my number.  Evidently two developers who also got the boot that day were already in touch with this recruiter, and BOTH said the BEST PERSON who was laid off was *ME*.  I was embarrassed - gratified, and humbled.  It turned out that the story of my willingness to stand up for my hourly part-time contract workers at the RISK OF MY OWN FULL-TIME JOB was making the rounds in Silicon Valley. 
I said, "Thanks but I need to think about it."

I took a month off, driving across country, and de-compressing. 

When I returned, I *did* interview with the Silicon Valley unit of SG, and after a grueling interview process started two weeks later. 
Once hired, I found out THEY ALSO heard about what happened at Calera - my standing up for my employees - and based on that, and my proven track record as a person who cared about quality, SG wanted to have me on-board.
« Last Edit: August 25, 2016, 05:42:00 PM by Mother Fussbudget »

marty998

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1183 on: August 25, 2016, 03:55:06 PM »
Fucking brilliant. Good for you MF.

Northwestie

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1184 on: August 25, 2016, 04:52:19 PM »
Fucking brilliant. Good for you MF.

Awesome.  Love it.

Mother Fussbudget

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1185 on: August 25, 2016, 05:18:50 PM »
Fucking brilliant. Good for you MF.

Awesome.  Love it.
I'm a stand up guy - what can I say.

But wait til tomorrow, and Asshair#2's story...

patchyfacialhair

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1186 on: August 25, 2016, 08:08:16 PM »
Fucking brilliant. Good for you MF.

Awesome.  Love it.
I'm a stand up guy - what can I say.

But wait til tomorrow, and Asshair#2's story...

There's never just one ass hair.

arebelspy

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1187 on: August 25, 2016, 08:42:34 PM »
Though most people wouldn't do what you did, having met you and chatted with you a bit, MF, it doesn't surprise me in the least that you did.  Tip of the hat to you, and glad the karma paid off via getting the next job.  Looking forward to the next story.  :)
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Mother Fussbudget

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1188 on: August 26, 2016, 09:27:47 AM »
Asshair#2: (1993)
Asshair#2 is a combo-creature of someone I'll call Agnes - my group's test manager - and a misandrist test-lead I'll call Luna.   When you work for a bad manager, but that manager works for a GOOD manager, you can always talk to the person who ultimately makes the decisions.  But when the asshair has grown 2-layers-deep...  Break out the scissors - you're in trouble.

After 3 years working as a Sr. QA Engineer in a Modern Art Gallery Office for a certain software giant (SG), and shepherding version 3 of the world's most widely used presentation graphics program to market by solving deep technical issues (memory leaks, program interaction issues, etc) - for both Windows & Mac - things were looking good.  Son #1 was "on-the-way", and my team was working on the next version of the veritable workhorse graphics program.  That's when the asshairs from WA state came down to CA, and secretly told managers, 'every team of 4 or more people needed to put at least 1 employee on a Performance Improvement Plan', or PIP. 

PIP's had always been a tool in the management toolbox, but SG decided in the spring of '93 to start using the 'PIP' more regularly. 
PIP - weed out the weak, improve the marginal, all through work-a-holic-hell.  You're put 'on probation'.  If you work your ass off, you *might* have a job at the end of the PIP, and can be fired at anytime' during the process.  Others hired before me had SG stock-options to rely on - I know of at least 3 people who used their stock options as FU money, and left as soon as they were confronted with the PIP, and never looked back.  If only *I* had done that...   

You can guess I was 'selected'... 
Scene:  annual performance review.  Me: surprised!  "*I* am underperforming? Why is this the first I've heard of it?".  Everything just fine up until that point.  As an expectant father, I think I was targeted as 'vulnerable' by Asshair - who had no interest in children, and who's non-SG-fit HP management style garnered little respect from anyone on the team - and because I pointed out in a team meeting Asshair was using an overhead projector, pens & flimsies to project the meeting agenda rather than dog-fooding our product which replaced those outdated things. So dual Asshair was looking to feather her cap (see postscripts).  I was asked to WRITE the "plan" - design the hell I needed to work my way out of over the next 90 days to be able to keep my job. I was rigorous, meticulous, and thorough. 
(What the hell was I thinking!?)

But I *was* thinking.  I knew I could work my butt off, perhaps go into 'crunch mode', and pull another 10hr/7days-a-week for 3 months until this was behind me.  I could BEAT this thing - I had a track record of beating the odds at Calera 3 years earlier. (by then Calera was defunct... :?)

Enter Worklife HELL.  I worked 14 hour days, and 20 hour weekends, for 3 months.  I put in more work, and found more defects than anyone else in-the-building.  Two months into it, I got the feedback: "You're not managing your time well - do the same amount of work in fewer hours."  I challenged my lead to show me anyone in the entire organization who was being more productive than I was, and that talk soon died away.  After 3 months, the final 'PIP' evaluation meeting was postponed another month.  One more month of Worklife Hell - long hours, working weekends.  But I did it.

In the end, I was given an 'unsatisfactory review', and the PIP went into my HR record... BUT... I still had my job.  I was the only person in the organization to start a PIP that spring, and survive with my job intact.  I lost all respect for management at that unit of SG for putting ANYONE through that kind of hell - the stress was intolerable, and unsustainable - family life was non-existent.  I made up my mind then and there to find another gig, but hopefully one at the SG 'mothership' in WA.    18 months later, I was living in WA.

Postscript1:
My son was born AFTER Worklife Hell.  He's still one of the 3 lights of my life.  All is well.

Postscript2:
After PIP hell, once in WA, I was called into the SG President's office (!) - Mike Syrup - and asked "why are so many people from the CA test team asking to be transferred to WA?  What the hell is wrong down there?"  I leveled with him, and said Asshair was incompetent, and the PIP process was uncalled for, being used recklessly, and should never have been used on a business unit of 60 people.  Also that if anything, Asshair needed to be PIP'd herself.  [Later, Luna *also* transferred to WA, and Agnes was given a 'stern talking to', 'management training', and kept that position until she left at a time of her choosing several years later]. 

Postscript3:
A few years later, when I was managing teams, SG corporate HR asked about the PIP process, and what *I* thought could be done to improve the process for the employee & for SG?  I may have mentioned that it was Worklife HELL, but didn't use such tame language… I suggested they level with the employee at the start, and make them an "offer-they-couldn't-refuse" along the lines of: "You're never going to survive this process. You can either put yourself through 3 months of hell, at the end of which you'll be fired... OR, you can take a 6 month severance package with pay & benefits, and resign right now".  My understanding is they adopted this procedure AND at the same time made it harder to successfully complete a PIP.  I think it's a cowardly management tool used by poor managers to make themselves look good to their bosses.  Either way a PIP goes, the manager looks good:  a) Asshair got rid of 'dead weight', or b) Asshair got that employee to work their butt off, and 'turned them around'.  Either way, it was a feather in Asshair's cap.  I will never be a fan of the PIP, and will never put myself through one again.  (and encourage others to do likewise should the situation arise...  and it might...)  I faced management issues that I usually worked out with a few conversations - once an employee who boasted regularly about 'gaming the system' wasn't pulling his weight, and spent most of his day on the phone with his wife.  I called him on it, and said it was obvious he wasn't enjoying his job, and should consider doing something where he could work-on-the-phone, perhaps helping customers solve their problems in customer support.   He thought about it, and…  well, ended up leaving on temporary disability, determined to 'work the system' by claiming mental disability, so he could get paid half-his-salary for doing nothing.  But that's not my story… ;-)  And PIP's were to play a role at least one more time.
« Last Edit: September 01, 2016, 03:16:01 PM by Mother Fussbudget »

Dicey

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1189 on: August 26, 2016, 09:49:33 AM »
Holy Cow!

coynemoney

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1190 on: August 26, 2016, 12:36:02 PM »
Damn, those PIPs are seriously messed up! Is this still practiced in that company or in the industry at all?

mm1970

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1191 on: August 26, 2016, 12:46:58 PM »
These Asshair stories make me sad.  They aren't really "FU" stories, ya know?  I mean I love to read them and that you survived, but the bad Asshairs did too...

mm1970

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1192 on: August 26, 2016, 12:49:30 PM »
Damn, those PIPs are seriously messed up! Is this still practiced in that company or in the industry at all?
We have them in our industry, but I've only ever seen them used when they were needed.  Like when there are obvious performance issues.

Kitsune

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1193 on: August 26, 2016, 12:56:21 PM »
Damn, those PIPs are seriously messed up! Is this still practiced in that company or in the industry at all?
We have them in our industry, but I've only ever seen them used when they were needed.  Like when there are obvious performance issues.

My last company tried to use them on me. A month after a great evaluation. A week after I announced I was pregnant.

I simply said that it was interesting, and that the Normes du Travail might be interested, and could I have a written copy. All of a sudden, there was no problem.

In conclusion: ASSHATS.

NoVa

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1194 on: August 26, 2016, 01:03:20 PM »
Damn, those PIPs are seriously messed up! Is this still practiced in that company or in the industry at all?
We have them in our industry, but I've only ever seen them used when they were needed.  Like when there are obvious performance issues.

Same here, never seen them used for a reduction in force, it's more "you have screwed up badly and I have to document in case we want to fire you if you don't fix the behavior." But wow, true horror show, pretty sure I wouldn't work a ton of uncompensated overtime to satisfy some sadistic boss.

jfolsen

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1195 on: August 26, 2016, 01:48:53 PM »
These Asshair stories make me sad.  They aren't really "FU" stories, ya know?  I mean I love to read them and that you survived, but the bad Asshairs did too...
Agreed.  EVERYONE has some amount of Asshair in their lives. Fortunately I no longer abide Asshair in my work life - thank you FU money!  I humbly beg everyone's pardon - these seem like 'honorable mentions' next to some of your stories.  I'm not a vindictive person - live and let live, I say.  But this seemed like a good forum to 'vilify them thru literature' (Jeffrey Chaucer, "First Knight"). 
I only have one (1x) "truly Epic" FU Money story - with Asshair#4. 

Begging everyone's indulgence - next Asshair... Monday?

birdman2003

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1196 on: August 26, 2016, 02:00:33 PM »
Yes, please continue!

homestead neohio

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1197 on: August 26, 2016, 02:18:16 PM »
Begging everyone's indulgence - next Asshair... Monday?

Upthread I shared about having to bear difficult boss/work situations and just knowing that I had FU money kept me from having to use it.  That said, the times when people actually say "FU" and/or retaliate to some extent are quite entertaining to read. 

Eagerly awaiting the next installment.

zolotiyeruki

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1198 on: August 26, 2016, 02:31:25 PM »
At my last job, all employees were grouped by salary/experience and force ranked.  There were lots of great employees, but since it was a forced ranking system, there's always the bottom 20%.  I know a guy whose managers had no issues with his actual productivity and work product, but because he lacked visibility to upward management, he was ranked in the bottom 20% and had to do a PIP.  He met or exceeded all the requirements of the PIP, but his ranking didn't improve significantly--again, not because of any negatives, but because of stiff competition and lack of mgt facetime.  He saw the writing on the wall and found a new job about a month later.

irishbear99

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Re: Epic FU money stories
« Reply #1199 on: August 26, 2016, 04:51:08 PM »
...Epic story about Felicia...

The only thing that would have made it better is if you had fired back some southern sass at her 'dear'ing you. A little "oh, sweetie, bless your heart, but I think I can afford to quit. Toodle ooh" said in a way that sounds sweet, but really tells her ' go F yourself PEACE OUT!'

Beautiful! Although I would have ended it with "Bye Felicia" as I was walking out the door, but that's just me.

I know it was something like 10 pages ago, but I can't resist...