Author Topic: End of The year work party  (Read 4693 times)

iowajes

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #50 on: December 02, 2017, 07:47:19 AM »
I am still thinking what to plan. No, it doesn't happen to me. I may get very drunk this year.

Get very drunk is rarely the right solution for a work party.

HomeSweetLab

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #51 on: December 02, 2017, 10:05:34 AM »
Productivity is irrelevant.  Are meetings necessarily MORE productive?  Are all work tasks always truly productive?
No.  But going to a party just seems totally different than going to even the least productive of meetings.

But it's not a real party, it's a work party = relationship building = similar to a meeting.  Most meetings are about people and relationships, not getting things done - a strange cultural norm we have inherited.

For what it's worth, we have to pay for ours, but as I'm contract, what I'd get paid for that time >> cost of meal, so I happily go spend the money and hang with coworkers, and be seen as a team player.

My thoughts exactly. Even in academia, where you would think meetings would be more focused, I've found that meetings of any sort are about 20% actual working and 80% relationship building/socializing. Work parties aren't any different. If you're paid to go, then go.

Just had our departmental Christmas party last night. It was after hours, but most everyone still made an effort to attend. It shows that you care about your co-workers and the department/organization/company/etc. I stuck around until about 10pm when the remaining people were too drunk to remember whether I was there anymore or not. As a bonus, took enough leftover meat home to last me about 4 days.

A few hours of your time to have an enjoyable lunch/dinner with co-workers and grease the wheels with the higher-ups. Not sure why anyone would question going to Christmas parties.

Schaefer Light

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #52 on: December 04, 2017, 07:16:58 AM »
Productivity is irrelevant.  Are meetings necessarily MORE productive?  Are all work tasks always truly productive?
No.  But going to a party just seems totally different than going to even the least productive of meetings.

But it's not a real party, it's a work party = relationship building = similar to a meeting.  Most meetings are about people and relationships, not getting things done - a strange cultural norm we have inherited.

For what it's worth, we have to pay for ours, but as I'm contract, what I'd get paid for that time >> cost of meal, so I happily go spend the money and hang with coworkers, and be seen as a team player.

My thoughts exactly. Even in academia, where you would think meetings would be more focused, I've found that meetings of any sort are about 20% actual working and 80% relationship building/socializing. Work parties aren't any different. If you're paid to go, then go.

Just had our departmental Christmas party last night. It was after hours, but most everyone still made an effort to attend. It shows that you care about your co-workers and the department/organization/company/etc. I stuck around until about 10pm when the remaining people were too drunk to remember whether I was there anymore or not. As a bonus, took enough leftover meat home to last me about 4 days.

A few hours of your time to have an enjoyable lunch/dinner with co-workers and grease the wheels with the higher-ups. Not sure why anyone would question going to Christmas parties.
Because I'm introverted and hate parties in general.  I really hate them when it doesn't seem like I have a choice about going or not.

HomeSweetLab

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #53 on: December 04, 2017, 11:35:18 AM »
Because I'm introverted and hate parties in general.  I really hate them when it doesn't seem like I have a choice about going or not.

As an introvert myself, I understand the feeling of discomfort that can precede going to parties with a bunch of people that you may not know too well. But it's just one afternoon/evening. How scary can it really be to hang out with co-workers whom you've probably seen before for just a few hours over food and drinks? And in this case, they're getting paid for it (because it's part of normal work hours).

Now if they were telling them "We're having this Christmas party on Saturday evening. If you don't show up, then we're deducting the hours from your Monday-Friday salary" that would be wrong, but that's not the case.

Since it's taking place during work hours, think of it as just another optional departmental meeting, albeit a fun meeting with free food and holiday cheer. If you look at it this way, then the OP is basically asking "Why can't I leave work early instead of going to this optional meeting?" Would you ask this question to your boss/superior under any other circumstances?

It appears from the OP's post that their workplace is not telling them that they must attend the Christmas party. Rather, he's asking why he can't leave early instead of staying at work while the others go to the Christmas party.
« Last Edit: December 04, 2017, 11:38:57 AM by HomeSweetLab »

Schaefer Light

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #54 on: December 05, 2017, 12:44:51 PM »
Because I'm introverted and hate parties in general.  I really hate them when it doesn't seem like I have a choice about going or not.

As an introvert myself, I understand the feeling of discomfort that can precede going to parties with a bunch of people that you may not know too well. But it's just one afternoon/evening. How scary can it really be to hang out with co-workers whom you've probably seen before for just a few hours over food and drinks? And in this case, they're getting paid for it (because it's part of normal work hours).

Now if they were telling them "We're having this Christmas party on Saturday evening. If you don't show up, then we're deducting the hours from your Monday-Friday salary" that would be wrong, but that's not the case.

Since it's taking place during work hours, think of it as just another optional departmental meeting, albeit a fun meeting with free food and holiday cheer. If you look at it this way, then the OP is basically asking "Why can't I leave work early instead of going to this optional meeting?" Would you ask this question to your boss/superior under any other circumstances?

It appears from the OP's post that their workplace is not telling them that they must attend the Christmas party. Rather, he's asking why he can't leave early instead of staying at work while the others go to the Christmas party.
No.  What I'd do is make up an excuse (like "I'm too busy to go to the meeting" or "I have a conflict") and then skip out of work early while all the other suckers are in the meeting.

Slee_stack

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #55 on: December 05, 2017, 01:37:13 PM »
No.  What I'd do is make up an excuse (like "I'm too busy to go to the meeting" or "I have a conflict") and then skip out of work early while all the other suckers are in the meeting.
If that is your general MO, you may as well treat the 'party' similarly and sneak out.  Your risk of 'getting caught' probably remains the same.

Still...you could just show...make sure folks see you...excuse yourself to the restroom...and head out the door.

Linda_Norway

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #56 on: December 06, 2017, 11:39:35 AM »
If that is your general MO, you may as well treat the 'party' similarly and sneak out.  Your risk of 'getting caught' probably remains the same.

Still...you could just show...make sure folks see you...excuse yourself to the restroom...and head out the door.

This is what I often do. Go to the party for some time and sneak out early if possible.

Sibley

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #57 on: December 06, 2017, 02:50:59 PM »
Ok, question. My work party is Dec. 7th. My last day is Dec. 8th. It's free. Walking distance. Normally, I go and stay for about an hour because I hate parties.

Do I go?
Sibley, I vote Yes. The hardest thing just might be trying not to gloat too much. Just keep saying you'll miss everyone,  even if its not true.

- Attending makes it clear that you left of your own accord, so management can't try to spin it any other way.
- You will probably see/say goodbye to people that you might not have otherwise.
- People will tell you wonderful things about yourself, which won't suck.
- You can have fun pretending it's really a giant, well-deserved going away party for you.
- I suspect the whole experience could prove to be quite empowering for you.
- It's great to go out with a bang.

It's totally up to you, but I just don't see much downside, especially if you can keep your distance from your immediate manager. Which makes me think of one more point:

- It might be just a little bit thrilling for your old boss to see/hear how much you're going to be missed.

What are the odds that the calendar would align so perfectly with your leave date? Make good use of it.

I'm actually in a weird situation. I'm leaving b/c one manager has messed with my head, pretty badly. I'm highly competent, respected, etc and I know it. The way my direct mgr communicates with me I get the opposite message. I tried to address this, and it wasn't successful, it only got worse. So now I have no choice to leave for my mental health (which is NOT me at all, part of why I need to leave). No one wants me to leave. I've had every other team try to recruit me, etc. Everyone in mgmt is like "if you ever want to come back, just say the word".

So, I really will miss people. I really don't want to leave, but I don't see how I can fix ME without staying. It's actually causing a lot of stress right now and I had a breakdown last week. Holding it together this week so far though.

I am going to the party. I'll smile, and say thanks and I'll miss everyone. And cry on the train ride home.

Dicey

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #58 on: December 06, 2017, 05:52:18 PM »
Oh, Sibley, fingers crossed that there will be no tears. Not the bad kind, anyway. ♡♡♡♡♡
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Papa bear

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #59 on: December 06, 2017, 08:22:42 PM »
OMG! I would almost go back to work to go to these parties!

I'm serious, these were always some of the most fun, craziest, best events of the year.  I still talk about the great times we had with the people I keep in touch with. 

So many introverts here, I'm one of the odd ones at 99.999% extrovert.

Go and try and have fun. Make fun of the ones that get out of hand. Chat it up with people outside of your department, play a few games, have some laughs! OWN that party!


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Linda_Norway

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #60 on: December 08, 2017, 01:11:59 AM »

I'm actually in a weird situation. I'm leaving b/c one manager has messed with my head, pretty badly. I'm highly competent, respected, etc and I know it. The way my direct mgr communicates with me I get the opposite message. I tried to address this, and it wasn't successful, it only got worse. So now I have no choice to leave for my mental health (which is NOT me at all, part of why I need to leave). No one wants me to leave. I've had every other team try to recruit me, etc. Everyone in mgmt is like "if you ever want to come back, just say the word".

So, I really will miss people. I really don't want to leave, but I don't see how I can fix ME without staying. It's actually causing a lot of stress right now and I had a breakdown last week. Holding it together this week so far though.

I am going to the party. I'll smile, and say thanks and I'll miss everyone. And cry on the train ride home.

Oh dear. Big hug from me. If your job is so bad for your mental health, then leaving is a very good idea. Or your manager should leave. That is probably more difficult to realize.

shelivesthedream

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #61 on: December 08, 2017, 03:48:14 AM »
I'm a freelancer in a very social, who-you-know field. I am also a HUGE introvert. But just as I have to allocate some of my social spoons towards my workday, I allocate some towards networking. Going to the pub with my coworkers on a project is not my idea of a brilliant evening, no matter how much I like them individually, but I decide in advance that I'm going to go on X day for one to two hours, show up, chat to people and then go home. That, for me, even though it is so casual and non-compulsory, is part of my work. I started because I noticed that people do talk about the people who never ever show up, and I didn't want to be one of them. So now I go enough that people feel like I'm part of the group and keen to spend time with them, but it's planned in advance so I can not spend too long there and relax by myself the next day. I also make an effort from time to time to catch up with coworkers individually. A noisy pub late at night with ten other people is dreadful, but a quiet coffee with one other person is nice. So when I refuse the umpteenth invitation to go out at night, people will just say "Oh, she's not antisocial, pubs just aren't really her thing." Work socialising is never just fun, it's always a bit of work, so you should treat it and prioritise your commitments that way.

Sibley

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #62 on: December 08, 2017, 08:54:08 AM »

I'm actually in a weird situation. I'm leaving b/c one manager has messed with my head, pretty badly. I'm highly competent, respected, etc and I know it. The way my direct mgr communicates with me I get the opposite message. I tried to address this, and it wasn't successful, it only got worse. So now I have no choice to leave for my mental health (which is NOT me at all, part of why I need to leave). No one wants me to leave. I've had every other team try to recruit me, etc. Everyone in mgmt is like "if you ever want to come back, just say the word".

So, I really will miss people. I really don't want to leave, but I don't see how I can fix ME without staying. It's actually causing a lot of stress right now and I had a breakdown last week. Holding it together this week so far though.

I am going to the party. I'll smile, and say thanks and I'll miss everyone. And cry on the train ride home.

Oh dear. Big hug from me. If your job is so bad for your mental health, then leaving is a very good idea. Or your manager should leave. That is probably more difficult to realize.

Yeah, there's a reason I'm leaving. The party went well. I went for about an hour, talked to people, then left early. Today's my last day.

TartanTallulah

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #63 on: December 08, 2017, 09:37:59 PM »
I love my work parties. At this time of year we go out for a festive evening meal, all staff invited with the organisation picking up the tab, and also have an in-house lunch at which we provide food and drink and small gifts. We have a great team and I enjoy socialising with them.

The way the work rota falls, I may be genuinely unable to attend the lunch party due to being busy with work this year. I'm kicking myself because it's likely to be my last Christmas at work and I only have myself to blame for the situation.



aspiringnomad

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #64 on: December 08, 2017, 11:47:39 PM »
Be thankful, mine cost me a couple hundred bucks. Clearly not mustachian, but I had little choice. At least I enjoyed it...

BlueHouse

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #65 on: December 09, 2017, 12:42:59 PM »
My wife works at one of the most well known and high class museums in the world. Their Christmas party is held after work and we all usually can't wait. There are several after work and weekend parties she has to go to during the year, I don't go to those. But the Christmas party is another story!! Some of the snobby people get really drunk and wild! lol This one lady always gets really wild so even I try to stay away from her. It's coming up on the 14th and I'm already ready for it.

For those that don't choose to take in a little fun and let your hair down so-to speak, why should you get special treatment? Or look at it this way, there probably isn't a boss around so why not just get on the internet and goof off? Taadaaaa problem solved!

As I was writing this I happen to think.... you wouldn't be one of those snobby people would you?

As I was reading this, I was honestly thinking "boy, I'd love to be that person that everyone remembers at a party!" but then I think about the times when I have overindulged and I'm mortified the next morning.  I guess I'm really thinking that I would love to not give a crap what anyone else thinks of me.  Not there yet.  But if I ever become that wild lady, I hope someone will realize that how great it is to have the feeling that she doesn't care!
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Erica

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #66 on: December 09, 2017, 05:16:27 PM »
We are not paid for our work parties and the location is at the main office two hours away.

Not sure why anyone shows up...but it's perfectly fine to do so.

Imho, work is a contract between to people, a company/business or an entity

I didn't sign a contract to volunteer but to get paid for my time

Erica

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Re: End of The year work party
« Reply #67 on: December 09, 2017, 05:19:09 PM »
OMG! I would almost go back to work to go to these parties!

I'm serious, these were always some of the most fun, craziest, best events of the year.  I still talk about the great times we had with the people I keep in touch with. 

So many introverts here, I'm one of the odd ones at 99.999% extrovert.

Go and try and have fun. Make fun of the ones that get out of hand. Chat it up with people outside of your department, play a few games, have some laughs! OWN that party!


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