So far I feel like we've been caving in to family pressure on holidays etc. SO is Jewish, and we've had several family gatherings for high holidays and other events. Her parents are still active and social, and don't seem to be as worried as I think they ought to be at their age, but it also makes us feel like stick-in-the-muds for trying to follow distancing/mask rules within the family.
So far we've drawn the line at traveling to see extended family for Thanksgiving, as we have in past years, in part because of an elderly relative up there. I doubt they'll have the usual big gathering, but even if they do, we won't be attending. But assuming SO's parents don't travel up there, they'll inevitably want to hold a local family gathering instead.
Xmas is (of course) all on my side of the family, and that's totally up in the air at this point. My family situation has changed radically over the past year, so things will be different regardless. But my SiL will probably still want to see her adult kids*, which means she and my brother will likely still be coming up from Florida(!) for the holidays. [* or possibly just her son who's local, as her daughter takes COVID way more seriously and may not want to fly home, or contact her far less cautious mother].