Are you still avoiding family due to Covid?

[NotJen]

I'm confused that masks are the precaution people are excited about ditching. Masks have not negatively impacted my quality of life in any way; they are a mild nuisance, hardly the largest sacrifice I've made.

When recalibrating what risks I'll be willing to accept post-vaccination, "not wearing a mask anymore" never crossed my mind. I'm thinking, "expand my bubble to another vaccinated household."

I agree.  I am so ready to see my family again, I don't even care if I'm still wearing masks everywhere.

Masks make me feel isolated and unseen as well. 

Here is an example that you might be able to understand: in pre-covid times I would frequently make eye contact with total strangers in a grocery store and exchange a quick smile.  This acknowledges that I've seen the other person and they've seen me.  It gives me a good feeling to know that even a stranger is willing to take that extra second to be pleasant to other people around them.

Now, when everyone is wearing a mask it's like they aren't even human anymore.  People in the grocery store are just obstacles to be navigated around; 6 ft. apart of course.

Masks prevent me from immediately recognizing the humanity of another person.  It's not a good change.

Interesting.  I find myself still making eye contact with people, and making facial expressions under my mask.  I feel like even with part of my face covered, there are still enough visual cues to tell if a person is smiling and being friendly - there are accompanying motions like nods and head tilts - lots of information and personality can still be conveyed with a mask.  At first things were a little awkward, but many months later, I've at least adjusted; masks seem very human.

Yes, this is how I feel. I mean, I'm not at all inclined to go around making eye contact with strangers in the store just because. However, I've had no problem reading visual cues with masked people that I see semi-regularly (store checkout, gym front desk, etc). And I can 'read' and communicate with anyone I have a close relationship with just fine with masks on.

I wonder if this is another one of those mysterious extrovert vs introvert differences/barriers?

I'm definitely an introvert when it comes to information processing.

I'm really good at recognizing people though (many times I recognize people without seeing their faces).  If masking made it hard for me to identify people (like a couple other posters mentioned), I might have more of a problem with it.

More on topic ... I haven't seen my family since December 2019.  They live relatively close to each other, but I live 800 miles away, and typically stay with them for an average of 3 weeks per year during my visits home.  It has been very easy to physically stay away to keep us all safe, but it has been very hard emotionally.  I miss them so much.

[Tass]

This may sound weird, but both dislike wearing a mask (mostly because it fogs my glasses and can be very uncomfortable after several hours) but I also am not looking forward to it going away. There's a part of me that likes having a mask on in public. I tend to stand out in any crowd, and the mask helps me feel like I'm standing out a bit less.  I've also been told by multiple people that my expression can come across as incredulous, when normally I'm thinking about something else entirely (a variant of "resting bitch face" maybe?).  A mask makes my face more neutral, and people seem to concentrate on my words more.  Most of all I like how it's become acceptable to cover your face in public.

Does anyone else share unexpected feelings towards wearing a mask?

Masks make me feel much less self-conscious of being judged by my appearance. To be clear, it's not the appearance I'm self-conscious of; it's the potential judgement for not fulfilling appearance-related expectations (like wearing makeup). It's been interesting to be suddenly relieved of a very minor but constant background hum of anxiety.

Masks are still annoying to manage, and it's not a net benefit. But it's a silver lining.

[Adventine]

By national law, I'm obliged to wear a face mask at my office workstation and a face mask + face shield combo whenever I am in any public place. That means I'm wearing a mask at least 10 hours a day.

I disliked wearing masks until I found one that was comfortable, breathable, did not fog up my glasses, did not cause maskne, and had good UV protection. (Here's a link to the mask I use).

When our national mask mandate started in March 2020, it was definitely unsettling and stressful. I can relate to @Eowynd 's grocery store experience. It was the same for me for a few months.

But after almost a year of wearing masks, people have found ways to adapt. Simple gestures, such as eye contact, smiling with one's eyes, nodding or bowing in acknowledgment, speaking a bit louder than one normally would, have all become social norms. None of these gestures require seeing the other's full face.

[OtherJen]

I'm confused that masks are the precaution people are excited about ditching. Masks have not negatively impacted my quality of life in any way; they are a mild nuisance, hardly the largest sacrifice I've made.

When recalibrating what risks I'll be willing to accept post-vaccination, "not wearing a mask anymore" never crossed my mind. I'm thinking, "expand my bubble to another vaccinated household."

What a wide variety of people we are.

Wearing masks (and yes, I do it) is actually the most bothersome precaution to me. It has definitely negatively impacted my mental health and my interaction with the wider world. It makes me feel very isolated and unseen.

Which is kinda funny because most of my work is in operating rooms where we wear them almost all the time anyway. In normal times, that was fine. In these times, it's verging on too much.

I'm not trying to be snarky.  I literally cannot figure out what you mean here.  Unless you are an actor or model etc., how does a mask make you feel isolated and unseen?  I barely even notice I'm wearing one anymore...

Masks make me feel isolated and unseen as well. 

Here is an example that you might be able to understand: in pre-covid times I would frequently make eye contact with total strangers in a grocery store and exchange a quick smile.  This acknowledges that I've seen the other person and they've seen me.  It gives me a good feeling to know that even a stranger is willing to take that extra second to be pleasant to other people around them.

Now, when everyone is wearing a mask it's like they aren't even human anymore.  People in the grocery store are just obstacles to be navigated around; 6 ft. apart of course.

Masks prevent me from immediately recognizing the humanity of another person.  It's not a good change.

Odd, I don’t have that reaction at all. To me, the masks signify that we’re all willing to do something to try to protect each other, and that gives me a bit of the warm fuzzies. When I do go out, I can still look people in the eye, nod, and make small talk. I wore a mask for 17 hours straight on Election Day and had great conversations with my fellow poll workers and lots of good, friendly interactions with voters (all masked). I had recently had a weird but adorable conversation about lasagna noodles with a little old lady at Meijer, and a friendly chat with the owner of the cafe where I recently picked up dinner. Plus, my nose always gets cold in winter. The masks have the added bonus of keeping my face warm.

[Adventine]

Maybe there's a disconnect between people who live in places where mask wearing is universally accepted and even celebrated as a way to protect others, and people who live in places where masks are seen as an inconvenience, as an unnatural way to live, or another of the less scientifically acceptable reasons to reject masks. People in the latter situation probably feel the isolation much more acutely.

[charis]

Maybe there's a disconnect between people who live in places where mask wearing is universally accepted and even celebrated as a way to protect others, and people who live in places where masks are seen as an inconvenience, as an unnatural way to live, or another of the less scientifically acceptable reasons to reject masks. People in the latter situation probably feel the isolation much more acutely.

I don't agree. Mask wearing is universally accepted in my rather scientifically minded area and I definitely feel less connected to strangers. Interaction and connection is far more minimal as everyone is wearing a mask and trying to get in and out of any social situation, by nature of the pandemic.  I'm not familiar with mask wearing being "celebrated" as a means of protecting people though, it's just a fact of life. 

[Adventine]

Maybe there's a disconnect between people who live in places where mask wearing is universally accepted and even celebrated as a way to protect others, and people who live in places where masks are seen as an inconvenience, as an unnatural way to live, or another of the less scientifically acceptable reasons to reject masks. People in the latter situation probably feel the isolation much more acutely.

I don't agree. Mask wearing is universally accepted in my rather scientifically minded area and I definitely feel less connected to strangers. Interaction and connection is far more minimal as everyone is wearing a mask and trying to get in and out of any social situation, by nature of the pandemic.  I'm not familiar with mask wearing being "celebrated" as a means of protecting people though, it's just a fact of life.

Let me clarify, when I wrote "celebrated," I didn't mean celebrate like a party. More like a valorization of the effort that people make to wear masks and stay distanced. It's the new behavioral standard to which we hold people accountable, and at least in my area, it is the behavior that is rewarded with social approval.

[Abe]

I have a condition wherein facial recognition is hard except for people I work with on a regular basis. It isn’t complete lack of recognition since I can identify my immediate fairly accurately and other family members & friends if they don’t change their hair too much. I rely more on gait/stance and other characteristics. As you can imagine, masks make this much more difficult (and on top of this we moved to a new state where we know only a few people). Weirdly this has forced me to be more interactive with others since I can’t be sure if they’re one of my friends or not until they start talking or I see them walking from afar. I thought that’d be a funny anecdote to share.

I do agree it sucks having to wear a mask all day in the OR and then having to wear it elsewhere. Oh well.

[charis]

Maybe there's a disconnect between people who live in places where mask wearing is universally accepted and even celebrated as a way to protect others, and people who live in places where masks are seen as an inconvenience, as an unnatural way to live, or another of the less scientifically acceptable reasons to reject masks. People in the latter situation probably feel the isolation much more acutely.

I don't agree. Mask wearing is universally accepted in my rather scientifically minded area and I definitely feel less connected to strangers. Interaction and connection is far more minimal as everyone is wearing a mask and trying to get in and out of any social situation, by nature of the pandemic.  I'm not familiar with mask wearing being "celebrated" as a means of protecting people though, it's just a fact of life.

Let me clarify, when I wrote "celebrated," I didn't mean celebrate like a party. More like a valorization of the effort that people make to wear masks and stay distanced. It's the new behavioral standard to which we hold people accountable, and at least in my area, it is the behavior that is rewarded with social approval.

I understood your use of celebrated, I just don't agree with you. Mask wearing is a behavioral standard in my area. I disagree that it helps people feel less isolated.

[SwordGuy]

Maybe there's a disconnect between people who live in places where mask wearing is universally accepted and even celebrated as a way to protect others, and people who live in places where masks are seen as an inconvenience, as an unnatural way to live, or another of the less scientifically acceptable reasons to reject masks. People in the latter situation probably feel the isolation much more acutely.

No, they're just selfish jackasses or willfully ignorant about the science, or both.   And probably American.

[ixtap]

I have a condition wherein facial recognition is hard except for people I work with on a regular basis. It isn’t complete lack of recognition since I can identify my immediate fairly accurately and other family members & friends if they don’t change their hair too much. I rely more on gait/stance and other characteristics. As you can imagine, masks make this much more difficult (and on top of this we moved to a new state where we know only a few people). Weirdly this has forced me to be more interactive with others since I can’t be sure if they’re one of my friends or not until they start talking or I see them walking from afar. I thought that’d be a funny anecdote to share.

I do agree it sucks having to wear a mask all day in the OR and then having to wear it elsewhere. Oh well.

Interesting, as I thought my tendency to recognize by gait and gestures was one reason I DON'T see masks as isolating.

[Eowyn_MI]

I'm confused that masks are the precaution people are excited about ditching. Masks have not negatively impacted my quality of life in any way; they are a mild nuisance, hardly the largest sacrifice I've made.

When recalibrating what risks I'll be willing to accept post-vaccination, "not wearing a mask anymore" never crossed my mind. I'm thinking, "expand my bubble to another vaccinated household."

I agree.  I am so ready to see my family again, I don't even care if I'm still wearing masks everywhere.

Masks make me feel isolated and unseen as well. 

Here is an example that you might be able to understand: in pre-covid times I would frequently make eye contact with total strangers in a grocery store and exchange a quick smile.  This acknowledges that I've seen the other person and they've seen me.  It gives me a good feeling to know that even a stranger is willing to take that extra second to be pleasant to other people around them.

Now, when everyone is wearing a mask it's like they aren't even human anymore.  People in the grocery store are just obstacles to be navigated around; 6 ft. apart of course.

Masks prevent me from immediately recognizing the humanity of another person.  It's not a good change.

Interesting.  I find myself still making eye contact with people, and making facial expressions under my mask.  I feel like even with part of my face covered, there are still enough visual cues to tell if a person is smiling and being friendly - there are accompanying motions like nods and head tilts - lots of information and personality can still be conveyed with a mask.  At first things were a little awkward, but many months later, I've at least adjusted; masks seem very human.

Yes, this is how I feel. I mean, I'm not at all inclined to go around making eye contact with strangers in the store just because. However, I've had no problem reading visual cues with masked people that I see semi-regularly (store checkout, gym front desk, etc). And I can 'read' and communicate with anyone I have a close relationship with just fine with masks on.

I wonder if this is another one of those mysterious extrovert vs introvert differences/barriers?

In general, I would describe myself as an introvert.  I like being around people but I need some alone time to recharge my batteries.

My hypothesis is that people who are single or live alone are more likely to be looking for the type of connection that I described.  People who have partners and/or children at home already get enough of that.  @MoseyingAlong sounds like they live alone.

To take the hypothesis further, I think that this hearkens back to the human tribal instinct.  If I am living alone then my subconscious mind recognizes that something is off.  I want to feel included because, historically, that was my best chance of long term survival.  Getting a nod and a smile from a stranger in a public place feels like being included in the tribe even if it is just for a second.

[NotJen]

I live alone.

(ETA: I don't find masks particularly isolating.  I *DO FEEL ISOLATED* since I can't see my family and I have only seen my friends 4 times since March.  BUT I don't ascribe this isolation to masking, since masking is what actually allows me to interact with people when I leave the house - and yes, I do need these small interactions to feel connected, but I still get them while wearing masks.)

[therethere]

YES! I don't live alone, but I WFH by myself and with no pets. I don't have routine work meetings either, so I really only talk to my husband for like 2 hours a day. I'm not a zoomer either, it's too exhausting to listen to all the loudies talk over each other and sit back with a pleasant smile. It's extremely isolating. I maybe only leave the house 1-2 times a week. I find myself talking to anyone and everyone on the few times I go out. Cashier, clerk, whatever. I think the first time we went to a bar (outside) in July, I talked to the waiter for 15 minutes straight. I'm an extreme introvert. I do smile and say hello now to almost everyone I pass on the street. But with the masks and my low volume voice, I feel unseen often also. I feel like masks have upped the divide between people even more. But maybe it's just because stragglers like me that don't have family around have really beared the brunt of an extra layer of isolation.

Thinking back on it now, BLM and the overall divisiveness in the country were also a big part on why I started to ensure on my walks I made eye contact or said hello to passerbys. There's a lot of people struggling and a lot of anger between people who have different opinions going on. Acknowledging each other, instead of pretending your'e in a bubble with your mask on, is just a small step in feeling like we are neighbors.

[RetiredAt63]

I live alone.  I feel happy when I am out and people wear masks and keep their 2M distance, because it means we all are being careful of each other and following the lockdown rules.  We nod at each other,  I can still chat a bit with cashiers.   What makes the big difference is Zoom and Skype, where I  can chat with friends and family face to face and participate in most of my pre-pandemic group activities.

ETA  I am definitely in the introvert camp.

[wenchsenior]

YES! I don't live alone, but I WFH by myself and with no pets. I don't have routine work meetings either, so I really only talk to my husband for like 2 hours a day. I'm not a zoomer either, it's too exhausting to listen to all the loudies talk over each other and sit back with a pleasant smile. It's extremely isolating. I maybe only leave the house 1-2 times a week. I find myself talking to anyone and everyone on the few times I go out. Cashier, clerk, whatever. I think the first time we went to a bar (outside) in July, I talked to the waiter for 15 minutes straight. I'm an extreme introvert. I do smile and say hello now to almost everyone I pass on the street. But with the masks and my low volume voice, I feel unseen often also. I feel like masks have upped the divide between people even more. But maybe it's just because stragglers like me that don't have family around have really beared the brunt of an extra layer of isolation.

So based a small sample here, it doesn't seem like my guess that this is an introvert vs extrovert thing is accurate after all.   You are an extreme introvert who finds masks upsetting and is craving outside contact.  Whereas, I also am introverted, work from home, and even pre-pandemic would regularly go weeks talking (in person) only to my spouse and the occasional clerk-interaction.  And I was fine with that. All the pandemic changed was adding masks, but as I noted above, that hasn't changed my feelings about social contact, either.

This is SO interesting. I predict an absolute avalanche of psych and sociology degrees coming out of this pandemic...

[former player]

Another introvert here who has no concerns about interacting with people wearing masks, whether I know them or not.

I understand that most people process most of their information visually - something which is emphasised in any speaker training or interviewing training, where visual impression and for speakers visual aids are given a lot of importance.  But perhaps there are differences in the importance of the visual to different people, and that this mask-wearing phase will be the source of research on that, in particular the possibility that different levels of importance are placed on seeing faces vs seeing the whole person vs not seeing them at all.  Or seeing people in person vs over the internet.

Everyone is different, perhaps this is another and so-far unrecognised way in which we are different.

[Psychstache]

Maybe there's a disconnect between people who live in places where mask wearing is universally accepted and even celebrated as a way to protect others, and people who live in places where masks are seen as an inconvenience, as an unnatural way to live, or another of the less scientifically acceptable reasons to reject masks. People in the latter situation probably feel the isolation much more acutely.

I don't agree. Mask wearing is universally accepted in my rather scientifically minded area and I definitely feel less connected to strangers. Interaction and connection is far more minimal as everyone is wearing a mask and trying to get in and out of any social situation, by nature of the pandemic.  I'm not familiar with mask wearing being "celebrated" as a means of protecting people though, it's just a fact of life.

This is part of the disconnect for me I guess, because I have no desire, pre- or post-mask times, to connect with strangers. What you are describing is a feature, not a bug (for me).

[charis]

Maybe there's a disconnect between people who live in places where mask wearing is universally accepted and even celebrated as a way to protect others, and people who live in places where masks are seen as an inconvenience, as an unnatural way to live, or another of the less scientifically acceptable reasons to reject masks. People in the latter situation probably feel the isolation much more acutely.

I don't agree. Mask wearing is universally accepted in my rather scientifically minded area and I definitely feel less connected to strangers. Interaction and connection is far more minimal as everyone is wearing a mask and trying to get in and out of any social situation, by nature of the pandemic.  I'm not familiar with mask wearing being "celebrated" as a means of protecting people though, it's just a fact of life.

This is part of the disconnect for me I guess, because I have no desire, pre- or post-mask times, to connect with strangers. What you are describing is a feature, not a bug (for me).

The other issue I've noticed is the much lower chance there is to run into someone I know (and like).  That's certainly due to less people going out, including myself. But mask wearing and distancing makes it hard for me to recognize people or have a casual conversation. So I don't put much effort into looking at "strangers" for familiarity.  People also seem less likely to return a greeting or gesture while masked but that could be because they are harder to hear and see (smiling) while masked.

[Adventine]

@Psychstache I'm the same: "This is part of the disconnect for me I guess, because I have no desire, pre- or post-mask times, to connect with strangers."

Even pre-pandemic, most of my casual social connections were online. That's probably why I didn't feel the loss of in-person casual social contact as much as others did.

@charis It's been interesting to see on this thread so many different attitudes towards mask wearing. We all (mostly) agree it's important to wear masks, but the posters run the spectrum from "Masks are great! I love wearing them" to "I'm only putting up with them as long as I have to."

[charis]

@Psychstache I'm the same: "This is part of the disconnect for me I guess, because I have no desire, pre- or post-mask times, to connect with strangers."

Even pre-pandemic, most of my casual social connections were online. That's probably why I didn't feel the loss of in-person casual social contact as much as others did.

@charis It's been interesting to see on this thread so many different attitudes towards mask wearing. We all (mostly) agree it's important to wear masks, but the posters run the spectrum from "Masks are great! I love wearing them" to "I'm only putting up with them as long as I have to."

I see several posters conflating a general dislike of mask wearing with a bad attitude toward mask wearing and desire to ditch them as soon as possible. That's not accurate.  I dislike mask wearing because I prefer to have unencumbered interactions with people. My profession, family, neighborhood, and social network involve daily in person interactions, including casual acquaintances. Am I going to stop masking wearing and social distancing because I'd rather not do it? Heck no. Do I desire to connect with "strangers?" I don't know, I guess I don't view everyone as stranger vs. not a stranger. They are really just people I haven't met yet.

[Dicey]

I have a condition wherein facial recognition is hard except for people I work with on a regular basis. It isn’t complete lack of recognition since I can identify my immediate fairly accurately and other family members & friends if they don’t change their hair too much. I rely more on gait/stance and other characteristics. As you can imagine, masks make this much more difficult (and on top of this we moved to a new state where we know only a few people). Weirdly this has forced me to be more interactive with others since I can’t be sure if they’re one of my friends or not until they start talking or I see them walking from afar. I thought that’d be a funny anecdote to share.

I do agree it sucks having to wear a mask all day in the OR and then having to wear it elsewhere. Oh well.

OMG, I struggle with this too! OTOH, I'm super good at recognizing people by their voice. We humans have infinite variables, lol!

[Sandi_k]

So, here's WHY we're still avoiding family:

My brother and family flew from CT to LA 11 days ago, for the holiday weekend and his MIL and SIL's birthday. SIL's whole family congregated in SoCal, and spent the four days together: Mom & Dad, their four kids, and 11 of the grandkids.

My nephew - who had tested positive in March 2020 - tested positive again last week. My brother believes it is a "false positive" because "we all already had it in March, so we're immune!" The test was a PCR test, which I believe is the gold standard for testing.

Gah. This is EXACTLY why DH and I chose to cancel our trip to SoCal that same weekend - my brother planned to (and did!) rendezvous with our sister, her DH, and their son. No word yet to see if any of them have tested positive, although my sister and BIL on that side of the family have both had their first vaccination since they are health care workers.

[Fish Sweet]

JUST CANCELED MY INTERNATIONAL TRIP NEXT MONTH!!!!!!!

I'm feeling both relieved and sad (maybe 75% relief to 25% sad, HA.)  This wasn't a pleasure jaunt, it was for taking care of business after a death in the family, with a secondary purpose of seeing my mom and visiting some of my very elderly relatives.  90% of my family live overseas in a place with extremely strict traveling regulations and no COVID spread whatsoever, and I really wasn't looking forward to A) risking COVID by going to the airport and then flying for 18+ hours, layover, etc., and B) jumping through all the hoops of tests, weeks of isolated quarantine, etc. when I finally got there.  Especially since I live in the plague epicenter (Los Angeles). 

I'm just glad I was able to talk all involved family members into postponing my trip for a safer time, since I was concerned that some of them might decide to fly over and see me (YES, IT'S EXACTLY AS CRAZY STUPID AS IT SOUNDS) if I didn't go visit them. 

[Cranky]

My dd and her fiancé are coming over for pizza. It’s about 20° out and we’ll eat by the fire pit. I’ve put out throws and hand warmers and when we get too cold they go home. LOL

Dd is the only one who’s been vaccinated so far, and she’s 26yo. Ohio seems to be baffled by this process.

I kinda like wearing a mask - warm and cozy! But I’ve also got some degree of face blindness so I identify people by voice, too.

[chemistk]

Whereas we had been seeing my in-laws weekly, looks like for the next few weeks we won't see them at all. Covid is going to burn through their house and they had absolutely no say in it:

My wife's three youngest siblings have autism, the youngest two are fraternal (boy/girl) teenage twins who are very low-functioning (mental age of 4 year olds, more or less). Autism is an incredibly complicated thing, and for girls it's still poorly understood. Long story short, SIL has mental health issues on top of autism, in the realm of depression/anxiety/bipolar disorder.

She (SIL) for reasons I won't go into, had to spend a month in a special care facility for people with specific mental health issues. They are on Medicaid and this was an unplanned event, so the facility would only keep her for as long as she needed to be stabilized. My MIL was told that she was to be discharged this past Friday, but on Wednesday she got a call that someone on SIL's floor tested positive for Covid and the facility's policy was to then test everyone on the floor regardless of whether there was contact. So, MIL asks "what happens if a positive test" and they say that "we are not a hospital and are not equipped to treat patients with Covid, further, since your daughter is being discharged any time spent here after discharge would be billed directly to you at full cost".

So, it's Friday, and MIL picks up SIL. Now, they've since pieced together a few things from what SIL can communicate to them, and this place was not a cool place to be (but, in-laws had no say in A- that she must stay in such a facility and B-which in the region she would stay in). Relevance to this thread?

Not 5 minutes after SIL gets in the car with MIL, MIL gets a call that SIL has tested positive and is currently infected with Covid.

Because of the autism, SIL has literally no other place to go than home. Rest of the household literally has no other place to go since their house is specifically equipped to be a safe environment for them. Because of the autism, and how the house is laid out, there's also absolutely no way to quarantine SIL or BIL from the rest of the family. So, for the next 2.5 weeks, we won't be seeing them until 24 days (incubation + infection) has passed or they all get neg. tests.

TLDR - Under circumstances that in-laws had no legal or medical control of, my wife's entire family now is exposed to and will likely all become infected with Covid.

(There is a bright spot - another of my wife's siblings was working at the time and we arranged for her to be able to stay with us for the next few weeks so she can continue to work [she works in, go figure, a different mental health facility and has to be tested regularly plus will be getting vax soon])

[Dicey]

Oh, that just sucks.

[Fishindude]

We have a large family and have not really altered our get togethers since this whole mess started with no ill effects.
One sibling tested positive so had to isolate for a while, but that's about the extent of it.

In rural areas, there is not nearly so much fear of Covid.  Some stores and restaurants we go to, few if any even wear masks.

[paulkots]

TLDR - Under circumstances that in-laws had no legal or medical control of, my wife's entire family now is exposed to and will likely all become infected with Covid.

(There is a bright spot - another of my wife's siblings was working at the time and we arranged for her to be able to stay with us for the next few weeks so she can continue to work [she works in, go figure, a different mental health facility and has to be tested regularly plus will be getting vax soon])

I hope everything ends well. If you can, give us an update in 2-3 weeks. I don't ask because I want to know the outcome but because my sisters family had covid in June. The family has multiple children, father got sick(took a month to get over it) but nobody else got sick in the family.(sick father stayed home for the whole month)

[Rosy]

Still not seeing family/friends.
I took one trip to the grocery store in two months, that's it, except for one holiday outing to a local Botanical Garden in late Dec.
Just heard that the first two of our friends received shots, can't wait to get mine.

I am worried about the new strains increasing the mortality rate, based on a live report I saw from an ICU in Brazil
their new variant affects the younger crowd in full force.
The doctor said they had one older (65) patient everyone else was in their 20s/30/40.
(Florida has a lot of interchange and visitors from Brazil).

My next trip outside the house will involve double masking and a face shield. If I wasn't concerned about someone pulling out a gun and shooting me, (yes, that has happened several times around here), I'd yell at the one or two people in the grocery store that defiantly do not wear a mask - wear the damn mask!

@chemistk - you did a wonderful thing helping out the one person you could:).
I hope it all ends well for everyone, what a tough situation to be in.

[remizidae]

I've been avoiding family for years, but nothing to do with COVID :)

I see friends outdoors. I wear a mask, but it doesn't bother me if others don't. As a fit, youngish person, I'm at low risk, and since I have no close contact with the elderly, I'm not worried about infecting others. Think for yourself, and make your own decisions.

[Dreamer40]

I live with my husband. We have a lot of family very close by and visit them in small subgroups while staying masked and outside. Last summer, we all gathered freely unmasked indoors, but then the rates started going up and our "bubble" started getting too big so we tightened things up over the fall. It was a hard decision at the time but we're already used to the new normal.

There are several seniors (early 70s) and a few younger ones with compromised immune systems. My husband's uncle died of covid a few weeks ago. He lived in another state so we hadn’t seen him since this all started. Sucks that we lost someone because many Americans prioritize their individual rights over other people's lives. I don't feel like the choice is mine to risk killing other people in my community. Social contract and all that. Wearing a mask is a pain in the ass and I hate it, but I do it so other people can live. Anyway, I'm excited that all the still-living seniors are now on waiting lists for the vaccine. I look forward to going into each others' houses again when the risk is lower. We'll bury the deceased uncle's ashes when the weather improves.

[hooplady]

I've been not only avoiding family but friends as well, if they have an un-vaccinated person in their personal bubble.

I seem to be one of the few folks who has actually tightened up on my social distancing in the last few weeks. Groceries only by delivery or pickup, no more volunteering, maintaining distance even when both of us are masked outside, etc. I was keenly aware that we'd see a spike after the holidays; now that I'm in this groove I'm fine maintaining it for as long as possible.

[Dollar Slice]

I seem to be one of the few folks who has actually tightened up on my social distancing in the last few weeks.

You're not alone! Numbers got so high at the same time that pandemic fatigue apparently set in - I'm seeing more and more people not wearing masks indoors around other people. On the subway, in the grocery store, in my building, etc. I stopped going into any stores (I might consider running in to pick up takeout for 30 seconds but I haven't done it). Only exception is doctor's appointments, which are unfortunately not optional due to medical problems. I'm postponing an MRI, though, it would take a long time and be around a bunch of people, and it's not that urgent.

[wenchsenior]

I seem to be one of the few folks who has actually tightened up on my social distancing in the last few weeks.

You're not alone! Numbers got so high at the same time that pandemic fatigue apparently set in - I'm seeing more and more people not wearing masks indoors around other people. On the subway, in the grocery store, in my building, etc. I stopped going into any stores (I might consider running in to pick up takeout for 30 seconds but I haven't done it). Only exception is doctor's appointments, which are unfortunately not optional due to medical problems. I'm postponing an MRI, though, it would take a long time and be around a bunch of people, and it's not that urgent.

Same.  We've just gone through an incredible spike in cases/hospitalizations/deaths here, and yet at midday in the grocery store yesterday there were the usual half dozen people (a decent percentage of the customers) maskless. This grocery store long since gave up on even attempting to require or enforce masking, actually right around the time the cases spiked. 

[hooplady]

I seem to be one of the few folks who has actually tightened up on my social distancing in the last few weeks.

You're not alone! Numbers got so high at the same time that pandemic fatigue apparently set in - I'm seeing more and more people not wearing masks indoors around other people. On the subway, in the grocery store, in my building, etc. I stopped going into any stores (I might consider running in to pick up takeout for 30 seconds but I haven't done it). Only exception is doctor's appointments, which are unfortunately not optional due to medical problems. I'm postponing an MRI, though, it would take a long time and be around a bunch of people, and it's not that urgent.

Same.  We've just gone through an incredible spike in cases/hospitalizations/deaths here, and yet at midday in the grocery store yesterday there were the usual half dozen people (a decent percentage of the customers) maskless. This grocery store long since gave up on even attempting to require or enforce masking, actually right around the time the cases spiked.

I'm so glad others agree. Been hearing about people going to Wal-Mart, restaurants, parties, etc. I just shake my head.

One family member is over 70 and should hopefully get her vaccines soon. But she lives with several other relatives of varying ages and occupations. I had thought about visiting this Spring but that's not going to happen. She's keeping a "Hugs Owed" log, lol.

[ixtap]

I seem to be one of the few folks who has actually tightened up on my social distancing in the last few weeks.

You're not alone! Numbers got so high at the same time that pandemic fatigue apparently set in - I'm seeing more and more people not wearing masks indoors around other people. On the subway, in the grocery store, in my building, etc. I stopped going into any stores (I might consider running in to pick up takeout for 30 seconds but I haven't done it). Only exception is doctor's appointments, which are unfortunately not optional due to medical problems. I'm postponing an MRI, though, it would take a long time and be around a bunch of people, and it's not that urgent.

Same.  We've just gone through an incredible spike in cases/hospitalizations/deaths here, and yet at midday in the grocery store yesterday there were the usual half dozen people (a decent percentage of the customers) maskless. This grocery store long since gave up on even attempting to require or enforce masking, actually right around the time the cases spiked.

I'm so glad others agree. Been hearing about people going to Wal-Mart, restaurants, parties, etc. I just shake my head.

One family member is over 70 and should hopefully get her vaccines soon. But she lives with several other relatives of varying ages and occupations. I had thought about visiting this Spring but that's not going to happen. She's keeping a "Hugs Owed" log, lol.

My parents were so proud of themselves for getting their shots that they stopped at a restaurant to celebrate on the way home.

[RetiredAt63]

I'm still avoiding everyone.

Vaccines are delayed,  but cases are down here as people are (almost) all observing the lockdown.  Quebec next door has a curfew.  We also have some cases of the more infectious B117 variant, so no reason to be less careful.

[Dollar Slice]

We also have some cases of the more infectious B117 variant, so no reason to be less careful.

Yeah, we have a bunch of cases of B117 in NYC now, so I wouldn't be surprised if cases start trending up again :-(

It is really beyond me how cases can be so high AND B117 can be spreading right here in the city and people are still on the subway and in the grocery store with no mask on.

[RetiredAt63]

We also have some cases of the more infectious B117 variant, so no reason to be less careful.

Yeah, we have a bunch of cases of B117 in NYC now, so I wouldn't be surprised if cases start trending up again :-(

It is really beyond me how cases can be so high AND B117 can be spreading right here in the city and people are still on the subway and in the grocery store with no mask on.

Mask wearing is really good here.  Still too many parties and other social gatherings, but now that the rules are being enforced and big fines are being levied, I expect that will settle down.  Trump's loss seems to have some of our Conservative leaders back-pedaling on lax pandemic measures.

Prominent Canadians have been breaking the travel rules and getting no sympathy.   If we hoi polloi have to suck it in and follow the rules, you elite have to too. 

[GuitarStv]

We also have some cases of the more infectious B117 variant, so no reason to be less careful.

Yeah, we have a bunch of cases of B117 in NYC now, so I wouldn't be surprised if cases start trending up again :-(

It is really beyond me how cases can be so high AND B117 can be spreading right here in the city and people are still on the subway and in the grocery store with no mask on.

Mask wearing is really good here.  Still too many parties and other social gatherings, but now that the rules are being enforced and big fines are being levied, I expect that will settle down.  Trump's loss seems to have some of our Conservative leaders back-pedaling on lax pandemic measures.

Prominent Canadians have been breaking the travel rules and getting no sympathy.   If we hoi polloi have to suck it in and follow the rules, you elite have to too.

We were stupid to allow frivolous travel to begin with (not to mention continuing it), and we're going to pay a heavy price for that idiocy.  I wish Canadians would stop looking at the US and patting ourselves on the back instead of looking at New Zealand and asking why we're doing so shit.

Today we've confirmed 50 deaths at the old age home down the street from where my mother lives in Barrie.  Three weeks since the entire staff and all residents were infected by the UK variant - which we think came from one employee who had contact with another person who travelled to the UK for a Christmas vacation.

[mm1970]

I've been not only avoiding family but friends as well, if they have an un-vaccinated person in their personal bubble.

I seem to be one of the few folks who has actually tightened up on my social distancing in the last few weeks. Groceries only by delivery or pickup, no more volunteering, maintaining distance even when both of us are masked outside, etc. I was keenly aware that we'd see a spike after the holidays; now that I'm in this groove I'm fine maintaining it for as long as possible.

We also tightened up.  Well, we've been tight all along.   My husband goes to the lab at the office when necessary.  But I started getting grocery delivery.

Still, plenty of folks in my IG feed still hanging out with friends (maskless), going on vacation, etc.  Our schools are still remote for the most part.

[nereo]

I've been not only avoiding family but friends as well, if they have an un-vaccinated person in their personal bubble.

I seem to be one of the few folks who has actually tightened up on my social distancing in the last few weeks. Groceries only by delivery or pickup, no more volunteering, maintaining distance even when both of us are masked outside, etc. I was keenly aware that we'd see a spike after the holidays; now that I'm in this groove I'm fine maintaining it for as long as possible.

We also tightened up.  Well, we've been tight all along.   My husband goes to the lab at the office when necessary.  But I started getting grocery delivery.

Still, plenty of folks in my IG feed still hanging out with friends (maskless), going on vacation, etc.  Our schools are still remote for the most part.

We have also tightened up our safety measures. Cases are surging, best thing I can do is not interact with anyone in person without a really, really good reason (and then with distancing and masks)

[waltworks]

My family already had Covid, and my wife is now also vaccinated (teacher) so we're basically fine with seeing anyone who is also vaccinated/already had it. But that's not really that many people yet outside of other teachers. So mostly still isolating, though the kids/wife have been at school since last fall, so it's probably a bit silly.

-W

[Morning Glory]

My mom got her second vaccine already and is coming to visit us in a couple weeks. We haven't seen her since August.
Our area had a big surge in November/December but it's slowing down now. The vaccine rollout is painfully slow, but I'm hoping that most of us have it by summer.

[des999]

We also have some cases of the more infectious B117 variant, so no reason to be less careful.

Yeah, we have a bunch of cases of B117 in NYC now, so I wouldn't be surprised if cases start trending up again :-(

It is really beyond me how cases can be so high AND B117 can be spreading right here in the city and people are still on the subway and in the grocery store with no mask on.

Mask wearing is really good here.  Still too many parties and other social gatherings, but now that the rules are being enforced and big fines are being levied, I expect that will settle down.  Trump's loss seems to have some of our Conservative leaders back-pedaling on lax pandemic measures.

Prominent Canadians have been breaking the travel rules and getting no sympathy.   If we hoi polloi have to suck it in and follow the rules, you elite have to too.

We were stupid to allow frivolous travel to begin with (not to mention continuing it), and we're going to pay a heavy price for that idiocy.  I wish Canadians would stop looking at the US and patting ourselves on the back instead of looking at New Zealand and asking why we're doing so shit.

Today we've confirmed 50 deaths at the old age home down the street from where my mother lives in Barrie.  Three weeks since the entire staff and all residents were infected by the UK variant - which we think came from one employee who had contact with another person who travelled to the UK for a Christmas vacation.

serious question.  if you and your family already had covid and did not get sick/recovered, would you feel comfortable travelling?  I think at least some percentage of the 'frivolous' travel is that.

I know myself and some of my friends/family had it back in November, and feel like now is a good time to travel.

thoughts?

[American GenX]

It's been 3 days since I've had my second dose of Moderna.   I still haven't even eaten out yet.  And I will still avoid family members outside of my household at this time due to COVID case levels in the area and lack of vaccinations among the family at this point.

[GuitarStv]

We also have some cases of the more infectious B117 variant, so no reason to be less careful.

Yeah, we have a bunch of cases of B117 in NYC now, so I wouldn't be surprised if cases start trending up again :-(

It is really beyond me how cases can be so high AND B117 can be spreading right here in the city and people are still on the subway and in the grocery store with no mask on.

Mask wearing is really good here.  Still too many parties and other social gatherings, but now that the rules are being enforced and big fines are being levied, I expect that will settle down.  Trump's loss seems to have some of our Conservative leaders back-pedaling on lax pandemic measures.

Prominent Canadians have been breaking the travel rules and getting no sympathy.   If we hoi polloi have to suck it in and follow the rules, you elite have to too.

We were stupid to allow frivolous travel to begin with (not to mention continuing it), and we're going to pay a heavy price for that idiocy.  I wish Canadians would stop looking at the US and patting ourselves on the back instead of looking at New Zealand and asking why we're doing so shit.

Today we've confirmed 50 deaths at the old age home down the street from where my mother lives in Barrie.  Three weeks since the entire staff and all residents were infected by the UK variant - which we think came from one employee who had contact with another person who travelled to the UK for a Christmas vacation.

serious question.  if you and your family already had covid and did not get sick/recovered, would you feel comfortable travelling?  I think at least some percentage of the 'frivolous' travel is that.

I know myself and some of my friends/family had it back in November, and feel like now is a good time to travel.

thoughts?

Travel is a great way of spreading disease.  Even if you're completely immune, your actions are causing pilots and crew to be disease vectors needlessly.  Not to mention all the people being forced to come into contact with others to get your plane ready (mechanics, cleaners, etc.).

Things will be different once the majority of people are vaccinated, but right now travelling for fun is very self centered 'fuck everyone else' thing to do.

[nereo]

serious question.  if you and your family already had covid and did not get sick/recovered, would you feel comfortable travelling?  I think at least some percentage of the 'frivolous' travel is that.

I know myself and some of my friends/family had it back in November, and feel like now is a good time to travel.

thoughts?

I would not, for a few reasons:
1) lead by example. Given caseloads we should be restricting all but essential travel, period.
2) it's still largely unknown to what degree formerly sick people might still be able to transmit the virus. According to our CDC, being a carrier is at least a plausible possibility.
3) New variants of the disease - much we don't know about them
4) We still don't know how long infection provides for immunity.  It could be for life (but seems unlikely) - it could be a season or two.

[Morning Glory]

We also have some cases of the more infectious B117 variant, so no reason to be less careful.

Yeah, we have a bunch of cases of B117 in NYC now, so I wouldn't be surprised if cases start trending up again :-(

It is really beyond me how cases can be so high AND B117 can be spreading right here in the city and people are still on the subway and in the grocery store with no mask on.

Mask wearing is really good here.  Still too many parties and other social gatherings, but now that the rules are being enforced and big fines are being levied, I expect that will settle down.  Trump's loss seems to have some of our Conservative leaders back-pedaling on lax pandemic measures.

Prominent Canadians have been breaking the travel rules and getting no sympathy.   If we hoi polloi have to suck it in and follow the rules, you elite have to too.

We were stupid to allow frivolous travel to begin with (not to mention continuing it), and we're going to pay a heavy price for that idiocy.  I wish Canadians would stop looking at the US and patting ourselves on the back instead of looking at New Zealand and asking why we're doing so shit.

Today we've confirmed 50 deaths at the old age home down the street from where my mother lives in Barrie.  Three weeks since the entire staff and all residents were infected by the UK variant - which we think came from one employee who had contact with another person who travelled to the UK for a Christmas vacation.

serious question.  if you and your family already had covid and did not get sick/recovered, would you feel comfortable travelling?  I think at least some percentage of the 'frivolous' travel is that.

I know myself and some of my friends/family had it back in November, and feel like now is a good time to travel.

thoughts?

Travel is a great way of spreading disease.  Even if you're completely immune, your actions are causing pilots and crew to be disease vectors needlessly.  Not to mention all the people being forced to come into contact with others to get your plane ready (mechanics, cleaners, etc.).

Things will be different once the majority of people are vaccinated, but right now travelling for fun is very self centered 'fuck everyone else' thing to do.

I would like to clarify that my mom is traveling by car.  I plan to do all vacations by car this summer also, so that we can have picnics instead of going inside places to eat, unless the whole family is vaccinated and cases are way down. My college is working through spring break and we get done in early May.  There was a nice article in the Atlantic about how all this doom and gloom about vaccine effectiveness might hinder the effort to get as many people vaccinated as possible (not an issue yet in my area because of shortages).  Let people have something to look forward to.


https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2021/01/giving-people-more-freedom-whole-point-vaccines/617829/