Anyone else find that a careful attitude toward spending is self-reinforcing?

[TL8]

A few years ago I started to think hard in advance before making large purchases (basically, anything that costs $100 or more). I began making an effort to envision in concrete terms whether the purchase would make my life better in some appreciable way, and I'd pull the trigger only if I could do that honestly.

Today, the result is not just fewer purchases, but also a newfound lack of desire to buy stuff. There was a time when I used to enjoy buying a new watch or new pair of dress shoes. These days I feel no desire to make such purchases and instead I feel a sense of internal resistance when I think about spending money that way. I find that I'm asking myself "Will this really make my life better?" less frequently because the urge to buy just arises a lot less frequently.

Has anyone else had this sort of experience? It's been a pleasant surprise.

The next step for me is probably to cultivate this sort of attitude toward home cooking. I spend more on eating out than I would like.

[iTellStories]

I used to buy all the latest gadgets and clothes, but now, I get much more satisfaction seeing how long I can make my phone/tablet/clothes last.  My iPhone is four years old, and still going strong.  I had to buy three new dress shirts last spring, but I take care of them.

Sometimes when I'm bored, I'll crunch numbers in my head, and see how much money I'm actually saving by not upgrading my devices, by visiting libraries instead of buying books for my Kindle, etc.  I'm also starting to hate owning things, and it's a good feeling!

[Valhalla]

Yes, I think too many people buy on impulse, and not think enough about the value of their time / money that was spent for the splurge.  Careful thinking of purchasing would be an excellent habit to develop...an under-rated skill for sure.

[Step37]

Yes, absolutely. I forced myself out of the habit of recreational shopping (told myself I was on a one-year shopping ban for 2015, for reasons I've outlined in more detail in other posts) and I've pretty much kept it up. There is no way in hell I could ever use up/wear out the absurd amount of clothing I have, but I'm sure trying. Committing to the No Buying New Clothes/Shoes Year really changed my mindset. I have zero desire to spend money on things I have no need for, no matter how pretty or wonderful. I can appreciate the things, but I do NOT want the things...

I have no problem replacing things that I do use and wear out, like gym shoes. It's a really good balance, and my savings rate is reflective of that.

[TL8]

I used to buy all the latest gadgets and clothes, but now, I get much more satisfaction seeing how long I can make my phone/tablet/clothes last.  My iPhone is four years old, and still going strong.  I had to buy three new dress shirts last spring, but I take care of them.

Sometimes when I'm bored, I'll crunch numbers in my head, and see how much money I'm actually saving by not upgrading my devices, by visiting libraries instead of buying books for my Kindle, etc.  I'm also starting to hate owning things, and it's a good feeling!

Yes, I identify with almost all of this! I get quite a bit of satisfaction out of using all of my stuff until it's truly worn and has to be replaced. And I don't hesitate to make reasonable expenditures on stuff that I use for my hobbies (sports) because that stuff allows me to do something I really enjoy.

I also feel the same way about owning things. I live in a relatively small apartment but we have drawers and drawers of stuff that we never use. Books, clothes, old electronics. I'd like to give away whatever other people might want and discard the rest. It just feels like a burden!

[Monocle Money Mouth]

Yes. Since I started getting my financial house in order back in 2015, I haven't bought much stuff at all. I was definitely spending more frivolously before that (camera gear). I really haven't bought much other than tools and clothes for the last couple of years. When I do buy something, I try to make sure it makes my life better and is something that isn't just going to get tossed in a closet and forgotten.

I used to use the rationale that I would just sell something if I didn't want it anymore. Selling stuff is a pain in the ass and you often only get a small fraction of its initial value back. The best thing to do is not bring any extra objects in to your life if you can avoid it.

[Laura33]

Yep!  I think that's the point, right?  That once you start actually paying attention to what life is telling you, you realize that more stuff does not equal more happiness, and that the initial high always fades?  :-)

It's funny, because I have come a full 360 on this.  I started out enjoying the hell out of not spending money; it was like it was a game to see how much under budget I could come in.  Because that's the way I was raised.  When I did spend, I never got a "high," because the enjoyment was overridden by guilt.

Then, once DH and I married and became DINKs, he convinced me that I could loosen up.  And after maybe 10 years or so, I definitely did.  I remember the feeling of going into WHBM and dropping like $700, and walking out with all of these clothes that actually made me feel like I looked good.*  Honestly, that was pretty powerful -- first-ever shopping high, with no guilt, because our accounts kept going up, and we could "afford" it.

But then I noticed that I couldn't ever replicate that feeling.  I'd go into the store and spend a few hundred dollars and never feel quite as good about it (because, honestly, no other clothes *can* replicate the feeling of seeing yourself in that first awesome outfit after you've lost a bunch of weight, and saying "that's really me?").  And without the same high, I started to notice the outflow more, and over time began to resent the money that I could have been putting away.

So now I am back to, eh, don't really want to shop; I haven't been to WHBM in probably a year, and the only clothes I have bought in a couple of years are (1) necessary workout gear after starting CF, or (2) "oops, I have no work pants that fit."  And when I do need something, I just look for it at Kohl's when I am there doing kid clothes anyway.  But the nice thing is that it is not longer about guilt or fear; I just honestly don't care about that stuff any more, because I know that beyond having a basic wardrobe that fits me reasonably, shopping and clothes do not make me happy.

*I had lost @60 lbs and did, in fact, need an entirely new work-appropriate wardrobe -- the trip was spurred by a pending court appearance when I realized I had no suits that fit, or even separates that I could put together and pretend.

[Dicey]

This is a great question!

In my pre-FIRE days, I took a super cheap travel-hacked vacation to Hawaii. Really. 12 days for <$400 oop. While on a hike, I decided to really cut my spending to accelerate my exit from the workaday world. On my return, I instituted a no-spend month, which became a spend very, very little six months. I believe it totally reset my desire to spend. It also coincided with the depths of the market. I saved more of my income than I ever had*. As the market rebounded, my efforts were rewarded handsomely. A few years later, I pulled the trigger and I've been enjoying the FIRE life ever since.

Nowadays, I mostly stay out of stores, save for cheap grocery and thrift stores. When I got married and we bought a house withing walking distance to DH's work, most of the furnishings came from the consignment store and CL. I say my shopping is under the radar.  So, so glad I decided to tighten my already frugal belt when I did.

*This is for those of you who get discouraged by some of those crazy high savings rates people report: My savings rate never exceeded or even got very close to 30%, except during that self-enforced, super lean period, when I just barely hit 30%. It may have taken me longer to get there, but get there I did. I smelled the roses and did the things along the way, as well. Don't get discouraged by your "low" savings rate. The earlier you start investing, the less money you will need to hit FIRE anyway. Start saving early, invest it well and you will reach your goals, even if you can't save 70% of your income.

[nereo]

Yes.
I frame every purchase within how it fits into my long-term plan.  I know that every $207 I spend could have paid for another square foot of my home. I've estimated how much money saved now will allow me to retire one day and one week earlier. And I try to honestly estimate how many uses I'll get out of something and evaluate the cost-per-use.
I ask myself if I don't already own something similar which can do the job, and think about where I'll store it (I hate clutter and already have way too much 'stuff').

Most often I conclude I dont need whatever 'it" is and decide I'm actually happier with greater FI.  Sometimes i surprise myself and realize that I'll likely use something frequently and it will be worth the initial cost.

Just as you described the end result is that I've found myself wanted less and less stuff, and I think my life is better for it.