Author Topic: 2020 FIRE Cohort  (Read 539919 times)

FireLane

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1450 on: February 25, 2020, 09:07:30 PM »
I’m doing a lot of coming in late and going home early these days. I highly recommend.

Same here. And don't forget the long lunches!

ysette9

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1451 on: February 25, 2020, 09:35:06 PM »
Oh heavens, yes! And since I get free food at work, I also eat second breakfast there after biking in.

Linea_Norway

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1452 on: February 25, 2020, 09:44:43 PM »
Even when I just spend the day at home because the weather is too bad to go out, I don't feel lazy. I think I deserve taking time off. I have worked hard for more than 20 years and never even had a long sickleave or parential leave. I am just tired and need to recover.

Hey it's great to read the different perspectives of the early graduating members of our class. :)  really make me think. I'm also around 20 years full-time working, never had a long leave, but was unemployed for a few months here and there due to layoffs etc. which definitely wasn't a vacation or relaxing. I will never recover, in the sense that being in the corporate world this long has changed me and made me a different person. I expect my first few months, maybe years, after retiring will not only be recovering from the physical and psychologic stress but also discovering how goals & priorities change. I've spent my entire adult life working 40+ hours a week in various offices with small groups of people who have an outsized affect on how I see myself and the world.  For example the indoctrination (brainwashing?) that if you're not working 8+ hours a day you're "lazy" which isn't some law of the universe it's just something we decided. I understand the feeling of wanting to stay "busy" after retiring. I feel that too, although I don't know how much of that is just a left over habit, and not how I really want to live, once I have the choice.

In addition to recovering from years of being stressed out like most commuters, I also just like to have time to do my own thing. My time has always been prioritized around my job, planning vacations and weekends so that I had to be back on Monday. I have never felt like I do now, that I can follow my own schedule. So far, I am enjoying immensely that I can shop at times when other people are at work. We can go to our cabin all the time when ski conditions are better there than at home.
And at the moments I don't have a plan, I just think of something to do. So far, I can always think of something.

tawyer

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1453 on: February 25, 2020, 10:19:39 PM »
Oh heavens, yes! And since I get free food at work, I also eat second breakfast there after biking in.
Was lamenting today about how expensive working from home is... I have to supply my *own* food and my *own* coffee... I concede I may decaffeinate myself when I retire and less cycle commuting will lower my caloric needs. Still.

ysette9

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1454 on: February 25, 2020, 10:22:06 PM »
We truly are spoiled, aren’t we?

BeanCounter

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1455 on: February 26, 2020, 04:12:34 AM »
Help guys. Im feeling anxious. My desired quit date is May 15. Next week my bonus from 2019 will hit my bank account. So I can turn in my notice and give them the choice, I can work 5 weeks until I go on a spring break trip and be done at that point. Or I can stay until May 15, but I’ll be taking a week off in the middle. (Or I could just wait and give my notice of four weeks when I get back from spring break)
Anyway, all the sudden I’m having all this anxiety. Bad dreams. Waking up at crazy hours. Upset stomach. I don’t know why. I know I’ve been planning this for a long time. I know I want to be home with the kids for awhile. I know we are FI (although the last few days have been rough). But walking away from $150k job seems crazy.
I can’t back out though. I have no summer childcare lined up now. I found our nanny a new job and I’m not going to hire another one.

Trifle

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1456 on: February 26, 2020, 04:45:47 AM »
@BeanCounter -- just stopping by from the class of 2019 to say that the way you are feeling is totally normal.  I think many of us felt that way when we gave our notice.  It's like the moment in skydiving when you step up to the open door of the plane and jump out -- a mixture of exhilaration and pure terror.  The good news is that after you give your notice that spiky awful panic goes away.  There are still some weird things during the notice period (like answering coworker questions about what you're doing) -- but it's easier.

Deep breath.  It'll be ok.  It'll be better than ok -- it'll be f*ing fantastic!  You've been planning this and working toward it.  If your plan is solid, it's solid and you can trust it.  FIRE is awesome.  Come join us! 

Maenad

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1457 on: February 26, 2020, 05:05:29 AM »
@BeanCounter -- just stopping by from the class of 2019 to say that the way you are feeling is totally normal.  I think many of us felt that way when we gave our notice.  It's like the moment in skydiving when you step up to the open door of the plane and jump out -- a mixture of exhilaration and pure terror.  The good news is that after you give your notice that spiky awful panic goes away.  There are still some weird things during the notice period (like answering coworker questions about what you're doing) -- but it's easier.

Deep breath.  It'll be ok.  It'll be better than ok -- it'll be f*ing fantastic!  You've been planning this and working toward it.  If your plan is solid, it's solid and you can trust it.  FIRE is awesome.  Come join us!

Thank you for this! Like BeanCounter, my stress level has gone up and I'm having trouble sleeping. My manager asked me if I'd be willing to stay on for the month or two it will take to backfill me, and I had to say no - my mental health really requires me to stop now. My societal brainwashing was telling me to do it, but I knew that if I did, my depression would start telling me that I don't deserve my dreams, and every day I would dread waking up.

Trifle

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1458 on: February 26, 2020, 05:33:52 AM »
@BeanCounter -- just stopping by from the class of 2019 to say that the way you are feeling is totally normal.  I think many of us felt that way when we gave our notice.  It's like the moment in skydiving when you step up to the open door of the plane and jump out -- a mixture of exhilaration and pure terror.  The good news is that after you give your notice that spiky awful panic goes away.  There are still some weird things during the notice period (like answering coworker questions about what you're doing) -- but it's easier.

Deep breath.  It'll be ok.  It'll be better than ok -- it'll be f*ing fantastic!  You've been planning this and working toward it.  If your plan is solid, it's solid and you can trust it.  FIRE is awesome.  Come join us!

Thank you for this! Like BeanCounter, my stress level has gone up and I'm having trouble sleeping. My manager asked me if I'd be willing to stay on for the month or two it will take to backfill me, and I had to say no - my mental health really requires me to stop now. My societal brainwashing was telling me to do it, but I knew that if I did, my depression would start telling me that I don't deserve my dreams, and every day I would dread waking up.

I went through that exact same thing last year @Maenad!  After I gave notice my boss asked me to stay a while longer, and part of me wanted to do it but the bigger/deeper part of me knew it would be a mistake.  It was very stressful, feeling pulled in two directions like that.  I am SO glad I just stuck to the plan, said no, and got out quicker.  Sounds like you made the right call for yourself as well!

BFGirl

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1459 on: February 26, 2020, 06:09:34 AM »
Watching a years spending disappear in two days might give me a bad case of OMY...

In general DW and I are in a better position to take a little extra risk on sequence of returns since we both have readily employable skills that won't be obsolete in 5 years. That was part of my logic in FIRE this year, but if the drop continues to the point if would trigger returning to work if I were already FIREd i might choose boring well paying work for a bit longer... Don't write me off yet though, November is still a ways off...

It is a bit disconcerting to have this happen the year you plan to retire.  Hopefully it just prepares us so we won't panic when it happens in retirement.   I'm already on the fence for this year due to wedding expenses and a concern about maintaining health insurance for my son who is still in college.  But my earliest date isn't until the end of the year, so I'm keeping my options open.

Linea_Norway

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1460 on: February 26, 2020, 08:29:28 AM »
01/01/20  Linea_Norway (@46)          CONFIRMED
01/01/20  firebrand                   CONFIRMED
01/01/20  Nancy                       CONFIRMED
01/01/20  openroadadventure (@53/50)  CONFIRMED
01/03/20  nwa-non                     CONFIRMED
01/07/20  alienbogey's wife           CONFIRMED
01/15/20  Nifty
01/15/20  Nickel (@55)                CONFIRMED
01/15/20  GettingClose's husband      CONFIRMED
01/31/20  ATS (@52)                   CONFIRMED
01/31/20  DisplacedHoosier (@57)      CONFIRMED
02/03/20  grobinski (@52/53)          CONFIRMED
02/03/20  IslandFIGirl                CONFIRMED
02/07/20  JumboShrimp                 CONFIRMED
02/??/20  RetireAbroadAt35
03/01/20  Bmjohnson (@50)             CONFIRMED
03/06/20  damyst                      CONFIRMED
03/07/20  Fresh Bread                 Swami
03/13/20  CrazyIT                     Given notice
03/13/20  ysette9 (@38)               Given notice
03/??/20  Maenad                      Given notice
03/20/20  Mmm_donuts
03/??/20  FInding_peace (@38)   
03/??/20 or 04/??/20  Padonak   
03/??/20 or later 20  Beeboy (@46)
03/31/20  texxan1
03/31/20  wildatheart (@53)
04/02/20  CptCool 
04/09/20  rab-bit's wife              Given notice
04/14/20  MarcherLady
04/17/20  Ottawa
04/??/20  DreamFIRE   
04/??/20  Exit2019
04/??/20  Pennycounter   
04/24/20  aspiringnomad (@37)         Given notice
04/??/20 or later 20  robtown   
04/??/20 - 07/??/20  JoJo
05/01/20  Fresh Bread's husband
05/01/20  Much fishing to do 
05/15/20  SailingOnASmallSailboat's DH (@50/51)
05/15/20  BeanCounter
05/15/20  Lucky13 (@44)
05/22/20  Body Surfer                 Given notice
05/31/20  Dee18
05/??/20  Rcc     
05/??/20  Lady Stash (@45)
06/01/20  Albireo13 (@64)
06/05/20  thelyon19
06/05/20 (or April) rab-bit (@59)
06/16/20  Kteach
06/??/20  Farmgirl (@61)
06/??/20  ixtap (date uncertain)     
07/01/20  FireLane (@38)   
07/01/20  Unique User (@50)
07/??/20  SugarMountain
07/??/20 or later 20  MMM123
07/??/20. bas5252 (@55)
07/??/20  2sk22 
07/??/20  SpreadsheetMan
08/01/20  HappyCheerE (@55)
08/??/20 or 2021  Bateaux   
09/??/20  Dan23
10/??/20  Rubyvroom   
11/01/20  Alienbogey
11/30/20  Itchyfeet
11/??/20  Alternatepriorities
12/31/20  BFGirl
12/31/20  Freedomin5 (@38)
12/??/20  david_shin   
12/??/20  MoneyTree (@36)   
12/??/20  Nora (@42)   
12/??/20  Sand101   
12/??/20  TheFIExplorer     
??/??/20  EscapeVelocity2020   
??/??/20  apurplelife   
??/??/20  BlueMR2     
??/??/20  catccc   
??/??/20  DadzillaGorilla (FI@35, RE@40)   
??/??/20  FIREstache (@55)     
??/??/20  LadyMaWhiskers   
??/??/20  letsdoit   
??/??/20  onlykelsey     
??/??/20  tooqk4u22     
??/??/20  Fresh Bread
12/??/20  desk_jockey
??/??/20?  Gumption

 
To be decided: tipster350

OLY:   
meatgrinder   
Life in balance (end of 2019)
2Birds1Stone (autumn 2019)
Firebrand (second week of December 2019)
   
OMY:   
RedefinedHappiness   
FIREby2021 (Q1 2021)   
TheContinentalOp (2021)
   
FIREing later:   
FIPurpose (date to decided)   
ToughMother (date to be decided)
GettingClose working 50% and not in management from 04/01/2020 for another year.
Katmandew (@54), parttime from 02/29/2020.

Steevven1 (@29): parttime from 01/2020.

« Last Edit: March 07, 2020, 11:31:55 AM by Linea_Norway »

Ottawa

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1461 on: February 26, 2020, 08:32:35 AM »
I’m doing a lot of coming in late and going home early these days. I highly recommend.

Yes, me too!  In fact, lots of not coming in at all. 
---
I think I need to be added to the 2020 cohort...if you don't mind? :-)
17 April - commence year leave without pay - never to return! 

Linea_Norway

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1462 on: February 26, 2020, 08:48:27 AM »
I’m doing a lot of coming in late and going home early these days. I highly recommend.

Yes, me too!  In fact, lots of not coming in at all. 
---
I think I need to be added to the 2020 cohort...if you don't mind? :-)
17 April - commence year leave without pay - never to return!

Welcome!

Alternatepriorities

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1463 on: February 26, 2020, 11:06:28 AM »
Thanks for keeping the list @Linea_Norway

It's really impressive to see so many people on it and helpful knowing that I'm not the only one thinking about life and money this way. That's probably the greatest gifts the blog and this forum as given me.

ysette9

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2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1464 on: February 26, 2020, 09:33:17 PM »
I caught my boss completely unawares today when I gave him my 2-week notice. I’ll be leaving one week after another lady, and our group is only 5 people strong, so it was a big hit for him.

That said, he was very gracious, congratulated me, and most importantly agree to let me be on vacation after my last day to burn it all off instead of getting a payout. The reason this is important is because it would allow me one more stock vest event before officially leaving. He didn’t have to agree to that, so that is considerate.

I had to go to the ladies’ room after our meeting to take a moment to wipe to goofy smile off my face before returning to my desk.
« Last Edit: February 26, 2020, 10:52:00 PM by ysette9 »

2sk22

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1465 on: February 27, 2020, 02:10:12 AM »
I caught my boss completely unawares today when I gave him my 2-week notice. I’ll be leaving one week after another lady, and our group is only 5 people strong, so it was a big hit for him.

Congrats! What a great sense of relief you must be feeling!

Linea_Norway

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1466 on: February 27, 2020, 03:37:43 AM »
I caught my boss completely unawares today when I gave him my 2-week notice. I’ll be leaving one week after another lady, and our group is only 5 people strong, so it was a big hit for him.

That said, he was very gracious, congratulated me, and most importantly agree to let me be on vacation after my last day to burn it all off instead of getting a payout. The reason this is important is because it would allow me one more stock vest event before officially leaving. He didn’t have to agree to that, so that is considerate.

I had to go to the ladies’ room after our meeting to take a moment to wipe to goofy smile off my face before returning to my desk.

I really don't understand how employers can manage with a two weeks notice. Here it is three months and they still despair when someone quits. But the notice period counts both ways. They can also fire someone with two weeks notice.

I had to smile after reading your last sentence.

Lucky13

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1467 on: February 27, 2020, 09:34:25 AM »
Congrats on giving notice! 

I really don't understand how employers can manage with a two weeks notice. Here it is three months and they still despair when someone quits. But the notice period counts both ways. They can also fire someone with two weeks notice.

I had to smile after reading your last sentence.

In the U.S. most salaried employees, outside of the government sector, are "at will" meaning we can be fired at any time, for any reason, without notice. (This has happened to me) So the "2 weeks notice" is more of a professional courtesy and not required on either side. I will be so happy to no longer be vulnerable to this anymore!

Anyway, all the sudden I’m having all this anxiety. Bad dreams. Waking up at crazy hours. Upset stomach. I don’t know why. I know I’ve been planning this for a long time. I know I want to be home with the kids for awhile. I know we are FI (although the last few days have been rough). But walking away from $150k job seems crazy.

Yes it is crazy to walk away from that salary! But I like the idea of doing something a little crazy... the analogy of skydiving is great, I am ready to jump!  it's going to be fun. Been on this plane too long. Looking above there are 3 of us targeting May 15th we will be jump buddies! actually everyone on the list is a jump buddy, we are all doing this crazy thing. (although I haven't given my notice yet so I guess I still could chicken out but I don't think so, now I won't forgive myself if I let 2020 slip away this is the year for a big change)
« Last Edit: February 27, 2020, 10:27:49 AM by Lucky13 »

mm1970

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1468 on: February 27, 2020, 11:13:51 AM »
Oh heavens, yes! And since I get free food at work, I also eat second breakfast there after biking in.
Was lamenting today about how expensive working from home is... I have to supply my *own* food and my *own* coffee... I concede I may decaffeinate myself when I retire and less cycle commuting will lower my caloric needs. Still.
my heart bleeds for you.

I get free coffee, tea, and cocoa.  That's it. 

Husband's company expands their freebies to sparkling water and soda.

But free food?  Pshaw, not here.

Maenad

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1469 on: February 27, 2020, 02:44:44 PM »
I told the rest of my peers today in my boss's staff meeting. They were shocked at first, then very congratulatory for me and admittedly sad for themselves. It is so amazing to have coworkers be happy for me for this, given what we often hear from others. So tons of mixed feelings on my part, but I'm still glad to be moving on to the next phase of life!

Lucky Friday the 13th is official for me - two weeks from tomorrow!

I did agree to come back to do a thorough data dump with my replacement once they're hired, for the low low price of a free group lunch. It's not going to be a hardship for me, and the goodwill will be worth it if I need a contract next year. :-D.

ysette9

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1470 on: February 27, 2020, 02:49:38 PM »
I told the rest of my peers today in my boss's staff meeting. They were shocked at first, then very congratulatory for me and admittedly sad for themselves. It is so amazing to have coworkers be happy for me for this, given what we often hear from others. So tons of mixed feelings on my part, but I'm still glad to be moving on to the next phase of life!

Lucky Friday the 13th is official for me - two weeks from tomorrow!

I did agree to come back to do a thorough data dump with my replacement once they're hired, for the low low price of a free group lunch. It's not going to be a hardship for me, and the goodwill will be worth it if I need a contract next year. :-D.
FIRE date buddies!

Are you using the word “retire”? If so, does it feel weird?

Alternatepriorities

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1471 on: February 27, 2020, 03:17:39 PM »
FIRE date buddies!

Are you using the word “retire”? If so, does it feel weird?

I did when I left my first career job in 2012, but it did feel a little weird. I suspect that was partly due to know I did not have enough saved to never work again at my desired level of spending... More like 5 years. I was traveling the whole next year so it came up a lot and I stopped using the term. In a years time I only met one couple and one single guy who were traveling for multiple months and had money saved to last beyond the end of the trip.

ysette9

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1472 on: February 27, 2020, 05:00:03 PM »
My manager just announced in our weekly staff that I am leaving and he used the word “retiring”. It felt wonderful and totally incongruous, almost absurd at the same time. People were supportive and didn’t express disbelief or anything, which was nice. Maybe I was making this up to be a bigger deal in my own bed than it really is.

Alternatepriorities

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1473 on: February 27, 2020, 06:10:58 PM »
My manager just announced in our weekly staff that I am leaving and he used the word “retiring”. It felt wonderful and totally incongruous, almost absurd at the same time. People were supportive and didn’t express disbelief or anything, which was nice. Maybe I was making this up to be a bigger deal in my own bed than it really is.

I’m glad your coworkers were supportive. It seems like there isn’t really a good word for retired outside of the FIRE community despite MMM’s effort to make “Retired” the word.

itchyfeet

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1474 on: February 27, 2020, 09:24:56 PM »
A little over a week ago I had reached 97.4% of my Number...... I haven’t done the numbers but I expect I’m back around 91% now, with the Aussie stock exchange having dropped 10.4%.

I need to stop looking every day. 😆

Linea_Norway

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1475 on: February 28, 2020, 01:23:31 AM »
A little over a week ago I had reached 97.4% of my Number...... I haven’t done the numbers but I expect I’m back around 91% now, with the Aussie stock exchange having dropped 10.4%.

I need to stop looking every day. 😆

We are hoping that the market is still low by the time we have sold our home and received the money for it, which is probably a few months later. The coronavirus looks like becoming a big thing, so the world economy might get a more serious knack from it. So far the market has just been anticipating, I think.

You probably know that the market will go up after having gone down. A temporary downfall should perhaps not steer your decision for FIRE.

itchyfeet

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1476 on: February 28, 2020, 02:37:02 AM »
A little over a week ago I had reached 97.4% of my Number...... I haven’t done the numbers but I expect I’m back around 91% now, with the Aussie stock exchange having dropped 10.4%.

I need to stop looking every day. 😆

We are hoping that the market is still low by the time we have sold our home and received the money for it, which is probably a few months later. The coronavirus looks like becoming a big thing, so the world economy might get a more serious knack from it. So far the market has just been anticipating, I think.

You probably know that the market will go up after having gone down. A temporary downfall should perhaps not steer your decision for FIRE.

As I said to DW today, it will be almost 5 years before we need to sell a single share (maybe longer), so the movements in the short term are really not relevant to our plans

Maenad

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1477 on: February 28, 2020, 05:43:41 AM »
My manager just announced in our weekly staff that I am leaving and he used the word “retiring”. It felt wonderful and totally incongruous, almost absurd at the same time. People were supportive and didn’t express disbelief or anything, which was nice. Maybe I was making this up to be a bigger deal in my own bed than it really is.

That's great! My coworkers were more supportive than expected as well. I've heard so many horror stories over the years that I was worried about my own judgement of their character. I should have trusted my gut, but it's OK. I think I am actually on the hook to tell them about FIRE in next week's staff meeting, though, which is hilarious.

And I'm proud to be your FIRE date buddy! :-D

ysette9

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1478 on: February 28, 2020, 10:54:28 AM »
My manager just announced in our weekly staff that I am leaving and he used the word “retiring”. It felt wonderful and totally incongruous, almost absurd at the same time. People were supportive and didn’t express disbelief or anything, which was nice. Maybe I was making this up to be a bigger deal in my own bed than it really is.

That's great! My coworkers were more supportive than expected as well. I've heard so many horror stories over the years that I was worried about my own judgement of their character. I should have trusted my gut, but it's OK. I think I am actually on the hook to tell them about FIRE in next week's staff meeting, though, which is hilarious.

And I'm proud to be your FIRE date buddy! :-D
Does that mean you are going to present on personal finance in staff? That is so cool!

BeanCounter

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1479 on: February 28, 2020, 11:24:32 AM »
update-
 DH and I had a long conversation about all the reasons for me to leave my job, the biggest one being the ability to stay home and focus on the kids. As pre-teens seem to want their mom and not a nanny. And then I have been "working from home" the last two days and that helped me refocus and see how I'm making the right choice. So I'm feeling better.
I've decided to wait until after our spring break to give my notice. So I'll come back on 4/20 and give them the news and be out by May 15th. No later than May 29.
Trying to decide what to call it. Retirement does seem weird since I'm only 42. But I've been working since I was 15, full time almost 20 years. I cannot imagine working another 20 years full time. I don't know how normal, non weird people do it!
Eleven more weeks.

ysette9

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1480 on: February 28, 2020, 12:24:20 PM »
I can only speak for me, but I thought a lot about how to frame why i am leaving. My situation is different because I just came back from maternity leave and also had requested part-time, but was rejected. So for me I really wanted to not send the message that I couldn’t hack this work-and-life thing and was being pushed out, but rather that I was choosing to quit from a position of strength because I have better things to do in life.

If I can project a bit in my own case, I didn’t want to be another case of “women can’t actually have it all after all” but rather “I have it all, and then some, and in fact I have so much fun planned that I don’t have time for this work thing anymore”.

This is probably just my own baggage speaking, so feel free to ignore if not at all applicable to you.

BeanCounter

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1481 on: February 28, 2020, 12:44:28 PM »
I can only speak for me, but I thought a lot about how to frame why i am leaving. My situation is different because I just came back from maternity leave and also had requested part-time, but was rejected. So for me I really wanted to not send the message that I couldn’t hack this work-and-life thing and was being pushed out, but rather that I was choosing to quit from a position of strength because I have better things to do in life.

If I can project a bit in my own case, I didn’t want to be another case of “women can’t actually have it all after all” but rather “I have it all, and then some, and in fact I have so much fun planned that I don’t have time for this work thing anymore”.

This is probably just my own baggage speaking, so feel free to ignore if not at all applicable to you.
@ysette9, I can totally understand where you are coming from.
And since I've been working mom for 12 years I feel like I did it and I'm not being pushed out because I can't hack it. But I'm really f#$King tired. It's a lot. And honestly it's easy when they are babies and toddlers. It's easy to find great care, wonderful people who can love them and engage them while you fill your intellectual cup up at work. But man, as they get older and go to school, I found it became exhausting. The school schedule is wacky. There is at least one random day off a month. And two weeks at Christmas, and a week at spring break. AND 10 f#%King weeks of summer. We have had to find care for ALL of that. or work from home or take PTO or some combination. And really it's worked fine. Maybe even great. But then they hit this weird stage where they are not really old enough to stay home all day by themselves (especially without killing their sibling) but they don't want a nanny, and they've aged out of camps and such. And the nights I get home at 6 or 8pm after a long board meeting, it's hard to engage. And I don't want to be that parent. I don't gain enough from my job to make mailing it in at home ok.

And here I am in my career where the next step is VP or CFO. Work has come to me and we've had that conversation about that next move. And I just can't. I've got no more to give. But yet if I stay at director, I'm board, stagnant. And maybe a little angry when younger guys move past me and get the promotion I should be taking.
So it's time. And when I turn in my notice I will say that "being home is just more compelling than being here right now but lets stay in touch". You never know right? :)

ysette9

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1482 on: February 28, 2020, 02:39:18 PM »
Good for you for making the right decision for you and your family.

And yes, I hear you on the ridiculous school schedule with random days off and minimum days and super minimum days (why did I even bother getting her dressed and schlepping her to school if she is only going to be in class for 3.5 hours?) and holiday shutdowns and so forth.

Body Surfer

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1483 on: February 28, 2020, 05:15:52 PM »
Despite the incredible market over reaction and panic $ drop I am still retiring as planned in May. I am comfortable with my market allocation. The market has no bearing on this decision.

ScreamingHeadGuy

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1484 on: February 28, 2020, 07:05:57 PM »
...And the nights I get home at 6 or 8pm after a long board meeting, it's hard to engage. And I don't want to be that parent. I don't gain enough from my job to make mailing it in at home ok....

This spoke to me.  I want to retire so I can, among other things, be a better parent.  My girl doesn't deserve to have me short-tempered because of some ass-hole client's unreasonable demands. 

...and a better husband, too, because my wife shouldn’t have to deal with that, either.
« Last Edit: February 29, 2020, 07:18:05 AM by ScreamingHeadGuy »

Linea_Norway

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1485 on: February 28, 2020, 11:27:59 PM »
@bmjohnson35 has his(?) last official day tomorrow. No more Mondays from now on!

The list contains a Bmjohnsen retiring at 50 years old. The only name appearing in the member popup is Bmjohnsen35. Still the same person?
« Last Edit: February 28, 2020, 11:32:04 PM by Linea_Norway »

2sk22

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1486 on: March 01, 2020, 03:50:44 AM »
I can only speak for me, but I thought a lot about how to frame why i am leaving. My situation is different because I just came back from maternity leave and also had requested part-time, but was rejected. So for me I really wanted to not send the message that I couldn’t hack this work-and-life thing and was being pushed out, but rather that I was choosing to quit from a position of strength because I have better things to do in life.

If I can project a bit in my own case, I didn’t want to be another case of “women can’t actually have it all after all” but rather “I have it all, and then some, and in fact I have so much fun planned that I don’t have time for this work thing anymore”.

This is probably just my own baggage speaking, so feel free to ignore if not at all applicable to you.
@ysette9, I can totally understand where you are coming from.
And since I've been working mom for 12 years I feel like I did it and I'm not being pushed out because I can't hack it. But I'm really f#$King tired. It's a lot. And honestly it's easy when they are babies and toddlers. It's easy to find great care, wonderful people who can love them and engage them while you fill your intellectual cup up at work. But man, as they get older and go to school, I found it became exhausting. The school schedule is wacky. There is at least one random day off a month. And two weeks at Christmas, and a week at spring break. AND 10 f#%King weeks of summer. We have had to find care for ALL of that. or work from home or take PTO or some combination. And really it's worked fine. Maybe even great. But then they hit this weird stage where they are not really old enough to stay home all day by themselves (especially without killing their sibling) but they don't want a nanny, and they've aged out of camps and such. And the nights I get home at 6 or 8pm after a long board meeting, it's hard to engage. And I don't want to be that parent. I don't gain enough from my job to make mailing it in at home ok.

And here I am in my career where the next step is VP or CFO. Work has come to me and we've had that conversation about that next move. And I just can't. I've got no more to give. But yet if I stay at director, I'm board, stagnant. And maybe a little angry when younger guys move past me and get the promotion I should be taking.
So it's time. And when I turn in my notice I will say that "being home is just more compelling than being here right now but lets stay in touch". You never know right? :)

I really feel for you. Working in software, I have always had a lot of work-from-home ability so I was able to use it a lot until my daughters reached high school age. As you say, middle school is especially difficult since kids are usually too old for camp and too young to stay at home. When the girls were younger, I could even take them into my office at a pinch if I had to take a meeting in person.

This did limit my career since I avoided management roles (although I was always very well paid). In the long run, the big payoff is that by taking care of child care in this critical period, I was able to enable my wife to concentrate on her career. She has now reached the executive level in her company - and she enjoys her work (I am very happy for her). Apart from our savings, this has allowed me to retire early.

No easy answers - we threaded the needle and it all somehow worked out.

BlueMR2

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1487 on: March 01, 2020, 06:36:20 AM »
The coronavirus looks like becoming a big thing, so the world economy might get a more serious knack from it. So far the market has just been anticipating, I think.

A few months ago I was telling my wife that sharp drop early in 2020 would be really nice for us (anticipated a recovery that I might delay my date a little bit for so I could increase the safety stash).  Now I kinda feel bad about saying that since it came in the form of COVID-19...

nwa-non

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1488 on: March 01, 2020, 10:53:59 AM »
Wanted to confirm that my last day at my soul sucking corporate job was 1/3/2020. I'm absolutely loving this RE-life!

Also, I go by NWA-non (NOT Now-non)

ysette9

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1489 on: March 01, 2020, 09:46:04 PM »
Wanted to confirm that my last day at my soul sucking corporate job was 1/3/2020. I'm absolutely loving this RE-life!

Also, I go by NWA-non (NOT Now-non)
Congratulations

Fresh Bread

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1490 on: March 02, 2020, 06:30:11 PM »
So our first rent payment has hit our bank account so that's us declaring ourselves FI! Let's hope that they stay there for a couple of years. The lease is one year. I'll have to see what the markets have done to us but we have a very fat FIRE expense budget so easy to pull back a bit if necessary. And gven that I'm still (barely) operating my own business and husband is employed til May, we have no need to draw down yet. 

aspiringnomad

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1491 on: March 02, 2020, 08:57:28 PM »
I caught my boss completely unawares today when I gave him my 2-week notice. I’ll be leaving one week after another lady, and our group is only 5 people strong, so it was a big hit for him.

That said, he was very gracious, congratulated me, and most importantly agree to let me be on vacation after my last day to burn it all off instead of getting a payout. The reason this is important is because it would allow me one more stock vest event before officially leaving. He didn’t have to agree to that, so that is considerate.

I had to go to the ladies’ room after our meeting to take a moment to wipe to goofy smile off my face before returning to my desk.

Congrats, @ysette9!! And it's awesome that you got to burn off your leave. I wasn't able to for very silly reasons.

CrazyIT

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1492 on: March 06, 2020, 01:32:27 PM »
Coming up is my last Monday morning meeting.  Yay!

I worked from home today.    Answered a few emails but mostly moved all my (personal) contacts from my work Outlook to my personal email.  Got my home office organized and cleaned up.   Have a decent pile of stuff to bring back to work.

Next week is optional for me to go in since my responsibilities have all been on-boarded to a vendor unless requested.

Guess I'll go in a few times to catch up with a few coworkers?  lol

5 days and counting. 
« Last Edit: March 06, 2020, 01:48:40 PM by CrazyIT »

ysette9

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1493 on: March 06, 2020, 02:55:45 PM »
I’m clearing out a good chunk of stuff from my desk today. I drove to work today (very unusual) so I could stick this crap in the trunk. I’m going through old files and deleting stuff, sharing stuff with my home account where applicable, and having a bit of a trip down memory lane on old projects I have already forgotten about. Thankfully there isn’t much as I have only been at this company a bit over a year. Leaving my previous company was a much bigger task as I had spent 14 years there.

One more week! I’m focusing more on the things I will miss and doing a good job of avoiding the stuff I don’t like. A good way to end things.

damyst

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1494 on: March 07, 2020, 06:11:19 AM »
Hi all, thought I'd crash this party to share that yesterday was my last day at work!

I can't really claim to be FIRE'd - it wouldn't mean much with a still-working high-income spouse + plans to spend most of my time building my dream business. But it was the FIRE movement that gave me a blueprint for escaping a career that was increasingly feeling like a locked cage.

I'm really stoked for what comes next, and wanted to share with folks who might be sympathetic :-)

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1495 on: March 07, 2020, 11:33:09 AM »
Hi all, thought I'd crash this party to share that yesterday was my last day at work!

I can't really claim to be FIRE'd - it wouldn't mean much with a still-working high-income spouse + plans to spend most of my time building my dream business. But it was the FIRE movement that gave me a blueprint for escaping a career that was increasingly feeling like a locked cage.

I'm really stoked for what comes next, and wanted to share with folks who might be sympathetic :-)

Congrats on not having a job anymore and being safe to do so.

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1496 on: March 08, 2020, 07:24:45 AM »
Hi all, thought I'd crash this party to share that yesterday was my last day at work!

I can't really claim to be FIRE'd - it wouldn't mean much with a still-working high-income spouse + plans to spend most of my time building my dream business. But it was the FIRE movement that gave me a blueprint for escaping a career that was increasingly feeling like a locked cage.

I'm really stoked for what comes next, and wanted to share with folks who might be sympathetic :-)

Congratulations! You had FU money, and said FU to a situation that wasn't working for you - that's wonderful!

My last day is Friday the 13th - I've got my last meetings this week, some I'm doubtful I can add much value to, so I may skip them. A goodbye shindig at one location Wednesday, then the other location Friday, along with my exit interview.

I also just found out that a coworker whose health has been bad for the last few months is in the hospital literally in her last days. She loved her work, so she was able to do what she loved up to almost the very end, but it's a good reminder to me that planning for your dreams and then executing that plan is vitally important.

I think Monday the 16th may be the best day of my life.

ysette9

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1497 on: March 08, 2020, 08:52:41 AM »
That is very sobering about your coworker. I’m sorry to hear that.

My joint goodbye lunch (with another coworker whose last day was last Friday) got canceled due to corona. Darned, she had picked a good restaurant also.

Friday the 13th, here we come!

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1498 on: March 08, 2020, 10:48:38 AM »
@Maenad and @ysette9 I'm so excited for both of you!  So much anticipation and excitement leading up to your last day of work. 

I just made it to the four week mark after quitting my job.  In that time I've been sick THREE times!  2 colds that knocked me out for about 4-5 days each and a horrid stomach virus that kicked my butt for THREE DAYS (me and the toilet became great friends)!!!  All I could think of was that there was no way I'd have been able to take time off work for any of those illnesses.  Thinking back on having to work while sick over the years makes me SO MAD, and not just for me, but for anyone who has to suffer through that. 

I think I quit at just the right time.  I know that if I had waited until this corona virus hoopla, I probably would have been scared to quit, seeing my net worth plummet by almost 10 percent is scary!  I spent double my grocery budget this month stocking up on food.  In the grand scheme it's not a big deal and I'll eventually eat it all, but in the short term, I'm like OMG, my budget!!!  But it's FINE!  I took this leap for a reason, I knew I was financially secure and the world may be going a bit crazy around me, meanwhile, I'm at home catching up on Netflix and blogs and cooking and organizing.  I haven't been doing a whole lot since it's still winter, but good weather is almost upon us and me and the great outdoors will become acquainted once again.  I plan on updating my journal in more detail if anyone is interested in reading it. 

ysette9

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Re: 2020 FIRE Cohort
« Reply #1499 on: March 08, 2020, 01:59:04 PM »
@Maenad and @ysette9 I'm so excited for both of you!  So much anticipation and excitement leading up to your last day of work. 

I just made it to the four week mark after quitting my job.  In that time I've been sick THREE times!  2 colds that knocked me out for about 4-5 days each and a horrid stomach virus that kicked my butt for THREE DAYS (me and the toilet became great friends)!!!  All I could think of was that there was no way I'd have been able to take time off work for any of those illnesses.  Thinking back on having to work while sick over the years makes me SO MAD, and not just for me, but for anyone who has to suffer through that. 

I think I quit at just the right time.  I know that if I had waited until this corona virus hoopla, I probably would have been scared to quit, seeing my net worth plummet by almost 10 percent is scary!  I spent double my grocery budget this month stocking up on food.  In the grand scheme it's not a big deal and I'll eventually eat it all, but in the short term, I'm like OMG, my budget!!!  But it's FINE!  I took this leap for a reason, I knew I was financially secure and the world may be going a bit crazy around me, meanwhile, I'm at home catching up on Netflix and blogs and cooking and organizing.  I haven't been doing a whole lot since it's still winter, but good weather is almost upon us and me and the great outdoors will become acquainted once again.  I plan on updating my journal in more detail if anyone is interested in reading it.
I am so sorry you have been sick.

When I was in undergrad I was super stressed and worked really hard. After finals were over each semester I wouid get sick, like clockwork. I finally decided that it was when all the stress let up it was like my body finally realized it was okay to let its guard down and then I would catch some bug that would force me to take it easy and rest. Maybe something similar is happening to you?

 

Wow, a phone plan for fifteen bucks!