Author Topic: 2019 fire cohort  (Read 793040 times)

Lews Therin

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1850 on: February 14, 2019, 11:59:28 AM »
Caution: this is a bit of an unstructured brain dump

Lest you think I've pressured him/encouraged this, he's been very firm on his lack of desire to retire any earlier. Well, he's since had a bit of a change of heart & now wants to consider retiring earlier. This has thrown quite a wrench into my own plans.

The seven year timeline is when our youngest graduates. When that happens, we will sell our incredibly expensive bay area house, and move somewhere more affordable.

If we stay the course, and I quit this fall after my sabbatical, we can continue to cover all of our expenses. That's not a risk. However, we won't have our house paid off in seven years. We'd both like that, but if feels arbitrary to worry about that if we're going to sell anyway. We have A TON of equity already in our house, so we're talking about the difference in equity of 85% of the house value coming our way after we sell, vs 100% of the equity.

I'm struggling with the tradeoff of giving up a career with a huge paycheck. It's really pulling at me. I *know* I'm ready to leave, but giving up the giant fire hose of money feels terrifying. Particularly since so much of my compensation is tied into vested equity that I will give up when I leave, never to get back. . . I want to be supportive of my husband, and do the right thing for my family. He's fine with whatever decision I make, & just wants me to be happy. But, I guess I like security & knowing I'm helping my family. .. more than I like my own freedom? I have guilt, despite the fact that my husband is very clear that we will make it work no matter what. We are in a great financial position, so this feels like a really ridiculous thing to get hung up on.

Did anyone else have these fears, hang ups, last minute doubts?


I'm 5 years older than my S/O; and about that much further along the FIRE Path (FIRE this year), but I promised her that if she ever ended up truly hating her job as much as I did (or starting to hate the job she currently doesn`t mind so much) I'd upshift to part-time, in order to allow her to downshift to part time. We'd both be making close to the same amount as her full time job (2x part-time + investments), and the pain of working would be reduced as a unit, since part-time isn`t all that hard.

Can you look at trying to negotiate with your work to downshift while still remaining with them? A well trained and useful worker is hard to replace and retrain, and with your FIRE stash, you have all the negotiating power so they might make an exception for you. (You'd keep a reasonably high salary, and help get your S/O to FIRE quicker, and still increase your happiness.)

I see it as a team effort, but you have to take the time to sit down, and figure out together what the plan is. (Nothing wrong with him deciding to do less, better than him resenting you and bottling it up!)

2Birds1Stone

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1851 on: February 14, 2019, 12:32:10 PM »
@MaybeBabyMustache, take this with a grain of salt because I don't remember everything I read on these boards....

I do remember reading some of your posts around these struggles in the past. Even old posts from several years ago that you were ready to quit back then. Your net worth and incomes are already very high. You're FI and comfortably so, the second you choose to downsize and relocate. The opportunity cost of that house right now is wage slavery. Think about how you will feel 30-40 years from now when your kids are your age. Will you look back glad that you worked 7 more years to afford that house? Or that you were able to quit/downshift and focus on being as present as possible in your kids lives, as well as figuring out your identities outside of the career.

Struggling with similar feelings myself, albeit I'm pulling the plug with a $500k net worth, knowing that I'm highly employable in the future, and even a year or two of work in my field down the line, can mitigate any possible sequence of returns risk etc.

What I can't mitigate with more $$, is longevity risk, and making the most of my time on this planet. Tomorrow is never guaranteed.
« Last Edit: February 15, 2019, 04:25:16 AM by 2Birds1Stone »

Parizade

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1852 on: February 14, 2019, 01:22:00 PM »
I'm struggling with the tradeoff of giving up a career with a huge paycheck. It's really pulling at me. I *know* I'm ready to leave, but giving up the giant fire hose of money feels terrifying.

I feel the same. I think it's similar to the "clean your plate even though you're not hungry because children are starving in Asia" I'm so fortunate to have this high paying job and I can wfh so I'm living in a LCOL area just shoveliing money into the bank at this point. Plus the people I work with are great and the job is not that hard. It seems crazy and ungrateful to the universe to quit now. Even though I don't need it anymore and really would prefer the freedom of retirement.

MaybeBabyMustache

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1853 on: February 14, 2019, 02:30:25 PM »
Caution: this is a bit of an unstructured brain dump

Lest you think I've pressured him/encouraged this, he's been very firm on his lack of desire to retire any earlier. Well, he's since had a bit of a change of heart & now wants to consider retiring earlier. This has thrown quite a wrench into my own plans.

The seven year timeline is when our youngest graduates. When that happens, we will sell our incredibly expensive bay area house, and move somewhere more affordable.

If we stay the course, and I quit this fall after my sabbatical, we can continue to cover all of our expenses. That's not a risk. However, we won't have our house paid off in seven years. We'd both like that, but if feels arbitrary to worry about that if we're going to sell anyway. We have A TON of equity already in our house, so we're talking about the difference in equity of 85% of the house value coming our way after we sell, vs 100% of the equity.

I'm struggling with the tradeoff of giving up a career with a huge paycheck. It's really pulling at me. I *know* I'm ready to leave, but giving up the giant fire hose of money feels terrifying. Particularly since so much of my compensation is tied into vested equity that I will give up when I leave, never to get back. . . I want to be supportive of my husband, and do the right thing for my family. He's fine with whatever decision I make, & just wants me to be happy. But, I guess I like security & knowing I'm helping my family. .. more than I like my own freedom? I have guilt, despite the fact that my husband is very clear that we will make it work no matter what. We are in a great financial position, so this feels like a really ridiculous thing to get hung up on.

Did anyone else have these fears, hang ups, last minute doubts?


I'm 5 years older than my S/O; and about that much further along the FIRE Path (FIRE this year), but I promised her that if she ever ended up truly hating her job as much as I did (or starting to hate the job she currently doesn`t mind so much) I'd upshift to part-time, in order to allow her to downshift to part time. We'd both be making close to the same amount as her full time job (2x part-time + investments), and the pain of working would be reduced as a unit, since part-time isn`t all that hard.

Can you look at trying to negotiate with your work to downshift while still remaining with them? A well trained and useful worker is hard to replace and retrain, and with your FIRE stash, you have all the negotiating power so they might make an exception for you. (You'd keep a reasonably high salary, and help get your S/O to FIRE quicker, and still increase your happiness.)

I see it as a team effort, but you have to take the time to sit down, and figure out together what the plan is. (Nothing wrong with him deciding to do less, better than him resenting you and bottling it up!)

@Lews Therin
I think the age gap is the hard part. I'm 9 years younger, so I do feel guilty that he's planning to work longer. In order to get past that guilt, I've created all of these artificial goals for myself that would "make me feel better" & ready to leave. I've BLOWN past all of those goals. He's supportive of me making this change, so the majority of this is on me & my own feelings on the age gap.

MaybeBabyMustache

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1854 on: February 14, 2019, 02:43:53 PM »
@2Birds1Stone - you are totally correct. Intellectually, I know that. I have all of the numbers to prove that out, but .. . still the anxiety. And yes, to @Parizade - I know I'm incredibly blessed by making so much money. So, I have guilt on that front as well.

Prior to my FIRE journey, I had no idea that I anchored so many decisions in guilt & security. . .Quite an eye opener

August

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1855 on: February 14, 2019, 02:54:25 PM »
I'm struggling with the tradeoff of giving up a career with a huge paycheck. It's really pulling at me. I *know* I'm ready to leave, but giving up the giant fire hose of money feels terrifying.

It seems to me that you have two options, stay where you are and keep the income, or leave to gain more free time.  Both options are good, so the question becomes - what do you want?

Lews Therin

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1856 on: February 14, 2019, 02:58:28 PM »
@MBM: Aim for happiness. Will you be happier FIREd? Will he be as happy if he has to spend longer?

Try to get the best match of it :D

stoaX

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1857 on: February 14, 2019, 03:14:18 PM »
Is today still the big day @SeanTash ?   May it go smoothly for you. 
 
Indeed it is - mark me CONFIRMED!
Last day was all a big surreal. It did go pretty smoothly, apart from a nagging voice in my head saying "you could do this a bit longer, it's not THAT bad, you should top up your stash" !


Congratulations @SeanTash!!   Ignore that nagging voice, and enjoy sleeping in tomorrow!


2019 FIRE Cohort:

01/01/19     Bingeworker (52)        CONFIRMED
01/31/19     Trifele (51)                 CONFIRMED
02/01/19     Socmonkey (37)         CONFIRMED
02/01/19     August (54)                CONFIRMED
02/01/19     Keeks (42)                 CONFIRMED   
02/01/19     Cycling Stache (44)     ?
02/13/19     SeanTash                   CONFIRMED
03/15/19     exit2019  (40)
03/19/19     ChasesFish (36)
03/??/19     MissNancyPryor (50)     
03/??/19     Edgema
03/29/19     JumboShrimp
03/31/19     BlindSquirrel
03/31/19     Loren Ver (36)
03/31/19     Mr. Ver (39)
04/01/19     HalfStached  (41)
04/01/19     Gerardc  (35)
04/01/19     JoJo (45)
04/01/19     Ryder (39)
04/04/19     PowerStache (43)
04/19/19     Eric
04/??/19     Luck12  (41)
05/01/19     Albireo13  (61)
05/15/19     MaybeBabyMustache                   
05/??/19     SamIAm38  (29)
05/??/19     FIRE 20/20  (42)
05/31/19     Odiedog8590  (62)
05/31/19     Livingthedream55  (59)
05/31/19     dude                              Date Confirmed
06/01/19     Prairie Stash
06/07/19     DreamFire
06/21/19     Parizade  (62)
06/22/19     Waffles  (52)
06/30/19     Pylortes  (42)
06/??/19     Oldtoyota
06/??/19     CryingInThePool  (44)
07/??/19     powersuitrecall  (47)
07/??/19     Enigma  (39)
07/??/19     Thedividebyzero  (45)
07/01/19     2Birds1Stone  (32)
07/03/19     Gerard
07/03/19     Miss Piggy
07/29/19     Lews Therin (29)
08/01/19     SugarMountain
09/02/19     Cornbread OMalley  (42)  Date Confirmed
09/??/19     RetirementDreaming
09/??/19     dayzero
10/??/19     VoteCthulu  (39)
10/??/19     Trix76  (43)
10/??/19     MoMan  (55)
10/??/19     Dreamer
10/??/19     Cookie78
12/??/19     HBFI  (38)
12/??/19     luckyme13  (45)
12/19/19     Itchyfeet  (47)
12/27/19     moxie
12/31/19     texxan1  (47)

2019 Cohort with date TBD:
Lowerbills (40)
getoutsoon (52)
IPlawyer
MustacheAnxiety
forward

OMY/2MY/Etc:
Freedomin5 (38)
Roboturner  (30)
Bateaux (51)
Linda_Norway (45)

OLY
markbike528cbx  (55)      OLY -- CONFIRMED 6/1/18; checking in as OP
MoneyStacher  (50)         OLY -- CONFIRMED 2018
PhilB  (52)                      OLY -- CONFIRMED 10/24/18
sui generis  (41)              OLY -- CONFIRMED 8/17/18
TartanTallulah  (55)          OLY -- CONFIRMED 10/2018
cerat0n1a                       OLY -- CONFIRMED 2018 
Chairman                        OLY -- CONFIRMED 2018
Bognish (43)                   OLY -- CONFIRMED 11/16/18

You can add me to the list.  July 5th is my last day at work.  I'm 58 years old so it's not a true Mustachian early retirement but an early retirement nonetheless.  Sure hope the stash lasts and the health insurance works out!

Zoot

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1858 on: February 14, 2019, 03:56:16 PM »
I think the age gap is the hard part. I'm 9 years younger, so I do feel guilty that he's planning to work longer. In order to get past that guilt, I've created all of these artificial goals for myself that would "make me feel better" & ready to leave. I've BLOWN past all of those goals. He's supportive of me making this change, so the majority of this is on me & my own feelings on the age gap.

I don't have any answers for you on this, largely because I'm living it myself, but in reverse--I'm 11 years older than DH (I'm 52, he's 41) and I'm the one who would quit tomorrow if I could get over the mental hurdles; on his best day, he loves his job, and on his worst, he tolerates it, while I tolerate mine on my best days and want to curl up in a ball on my worst.  ;-)  But maybe you'll find a thread of something in my story that will be of some assistance.

DH and I have had the when-can-Zoot-quit conversation many times--and he has assured me every time that I can quit tomorrow if I want to.  Our LNW is roughly $800K in retirement funds and $100K in taxable, with another $250K in home equity.  We can live on his salary, comfortably but not lavishly, but our savings rate would take a big hit without my salary.  Every time I think about quitting, though, I am struck with guilt--I somehow can't conscience leaving work while he's still working.  "You've paid your dues for a decade longer than I have," he will tell me.  "It's OK if you want to go ahead and quit--you don't need to work just because I am."  And yet I still am. 

I told myself I'd work until we hit $1 million in net worth.  We hit that.  I then told myself I'd work until we had $1 million in LIQUID net worth.  We're working toward that, and if the market is kind we'll likely hit that in about a year's time.  I can already hear myself making my next argument, though--after we hit the LNW goal, it'll be, "well, I should work until the house is paid off."  Knowing me, I'll come up with some OTHER goal after that one is accomplished.

All of these are good things to do, good goals to have--but deep down, I think they are just smoke screens for the real reason I'm still working:  guilt, which itself is just another smoke screen for the REAL real reason. 

It's fear.  Abject fear.  Fear of being penniless, homeless, resource-less.  Irrational?  Probably.  But convince the scared child inside me that it's irrational.  Go ahead.  I'll wait.  ;-)

I guess what I'd say to you in your situation, based on my own similar-but-not-identical experience, is this:  beyond wholesome prudential planning for post-career cash flow, your goal of having a paid off house before you pull the trigger is an arbitrary one, established by you as a couple and as such alterable by you as a couple.  Take a look at the numbers, and take a look at your heart--model the reality of your both quitting financially, mentally, emotionally, and see what it has to tell you.  You may be able to construct a reality that you can both be comfortable with bringing to life.

(Can you tell I'm talking to myself here as much as I'm talking to you?  Thanks for the opportunity to reflect!)


FIRE 20/20

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1859 on: February 14, 2019, 08:41:29 PM »
All of these are good things to do, good goals to have--but deep down, I think they are just smoke screens for the real reason I'm still working:  guilt, which itself is just another smoke screen for the REAL real reason. 

It's fear.  Abject fear.  Fear of being penniless, homeless, resource-less.  Irrational?  Probably.  But convince the scared child inside me that it's irrational.  Go ahead.  I'll wait.  ;-)


I love this, @Zoot ; I'm going through something similar but without the guilt middleman.  I'm going straight from developing artificial goals well past the finish line due to fear. 

@MaybeBabyMustache , I wish I had something worthwhile to say to help you out.  One question - if you're going to be taking a sabbatical, can you just do that and take the sabbatical and delay the decision?  I was going to suggest going to part time or reducing your responsibilities somehow but Lews Therin beat me to it.  The only thing I can suggest is taking a some time, maybe with your husband or maybe with a therapist, to work out what you're feeling and why.  What's pushing you away from work?  Is it the stress, the time it takes from family, the inability to do the things you want to do, or something else?  What's pushing you to stay, really?  How much of it is fear about running short on money, how much is putting pressure on your husband, or is it something else entirely?  Talking to a therapist might help.  This is an oversimplification, but it might be easier to come to an answer if you understand the problem a little better.  If, for instance, you decide that the main issue is that you're just overwhelmed at work then perhaps negotiating something part-time or lower stress would solve that problem and let you keep working to resolve the fear of running out of money and putting the burden on your husband.  Or maybe you'll realize the fear is really about running out of money but you might be able to trim expenses so you have enough even if you quit and your husband works less than initially planned, so you can quit guilt-free.

Whatever you do, I wish you the best.  It sounds like many of us are dealing with similar issues even if our situations are radically different. 

markbike528CBX

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1860 on: February 14, 2019, 09:13:51 PM »
MaybeBabyMustache, Zoot and readers generally.

If it makes you feel any better, there are several forum members on the "2M to 3M and beyond" thread that express the same issues that you have.

At some point, you just have to pull the ripcord and bail out.  "Enough" by John Bogle is a helpful read.

As to FIRE, come on in, the water is warm, welcoming and generally great!. 

Zoot, well said, most peoples root cause of not FIREing
            "It's fear.  Abject fear.  Fear of being penniless, homeless, resource-less.  Irrational?  Probably.  But convince the scared child inside me that it's irrational.  Go ahead.  I'll wait.  ;-) "

Sorry I don't have time to psychoanalyze the scared child/ bag-lady etc.   I'm having too much fun in FIRE.

Markbike528- Thread OP and FIRED since 6/2/18.
My future mission (should I choose to accept it) is to find the TwoLessYears members of this thread.
This message will self destruct in 10...9...8....

 

sui generis

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1861 on: February 14, 2019, 09:17:02 PM »
@MaybeBabyMustache, I was worried about many stressful philosphical and social questions as I approached my RE date as well.  And I absolutely went to see a therapist I had used before with great success, as a life coach.  It's funny, as I'm packing to move, I just came across the notes I made before going to see her, about all the topics I wanted to cover.  All the doubts that were in my head, with little lines connecting various thought bubbles to each other that felt interconnected to me. It was so worth it. It really helped me understand my thinking better and prepare for FIRE more.  Obviously, I highly recommend it!

markbike528CBX

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1862 on: February 14, 2019, 10:25:26 PM »
@MaybeBabyMustache, take this with a grain of salt because I don't remember everything I read on these boards....
......Snip......
What I can't mitigate with more $$, is longevity risk, and making the most of my time on this planet. Tomorrow is never guaranteed.

You can't mitigate longevity risk, but you can visualize it.       http://engaging-data.com/will-money-last-retire-early/?utm_source=mmm

Just think, the longer you OMY, the more likely it is that you'll end up dead instead of broke!

itchyfeet

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1863 on: February 15, 2019, 02:27:04 AM »
I think about longevity risk a fair bit.

I always assume a 40 year retirement for me and 50 years for DW. I don’t want her to be without $$ after I’m gone.

But the reality is that I really cant see me being alive at 87, so on that front I am being too conservative. Given how I don’t look after myself, a stash for 30 years should be plenty. Nobody in family tree has made it to 80 yet.

On the other hand DW living beyond 92 is quite probable given the age her grandparents died (in their 90s) and the fact that her older aunts and uncles are all still alive in their late 70s (not one early death). All this with the fact that she doesn’t smoke, barely drinks and exercises most days, carries no excess weight etc etc....

So I am left with the conundrum of wanting to be aggressive with FIRE to make the most of my remaining years, but having to be conservative because DW will quite probably be around for 60 years. And as the primary earner I feel the responsibility to ensure we are both provided for rests on me.

Trifle

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1864 on: February 15, 2019, 03:44:12 AM »
Welcome aboard @stoaX -- got you added for July 5 in the list above ^.  Congrats on setting the date!  And yes it sure as hell does count as FIRE -- good for you.  :)


@MaybeBabyMustache -- I think that once you intellectually know that you have enough money to FIRE, the decision really is just as simple (simple, but not necessarily easy) as deciding which you want more.  The freedom, or more money.   At some point -- if you conclude you want the freedom -- you just need to take a leap of faith and jump.  I was nervous about some things and making the decision was shit-scary at times, but I have absolutely no regrets.  As a new FIRE-ee I can tell you that it's fantastic and I'm happier than I've ever been.  I'm sleeping like a baby, getting my fitness back, and doing whatever the hell I want.  I wish I could have done this ten years ago.   

If it helps you calm the Inner Bag Lady down, FIRE is also not really a one way street.  You know how FIRE-ees often say that money and opportunities fall in their lap after they retire?  It's true.  Just in the past two weeks I've had two unsolicited job offers.  it's very comforting to know I could go back to work if I really needed to and my family will not go hungry.  For most of us FIREing doesn't mean stepping from Full-On-Work land through a black curtain into No-Work-Ever-Again land.  Now that I'm FIREd I can see that it feels just like life, only way more fun, with more time, and no work stress.   

I second the suggestion that you take that sabbatical and search your heart, see how things play out.  The part time suggestion above is also a good one to consider.  I worked part time for several years when my kids were younger and it was a great compromise that met our family needs at the time.   

EDIT to add:  Here's a thread in the 'Post FIRE' section talking about this issue:  https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/post-fire/serious-'one-more-year'-syndrome-advice-appreciated/

Also, Dr. Doom (great writer) did a "Quit Series" about the thoughts that swirl before we quit.  You may connect with that.  https://livingafi.com/the-quit-series/

 
« Last Edit: February 15, 2019, 05:24:47 AM by Trifele »

chasesfish

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1865 on: February 15, 2019, 08:40:38 AM »
If you're interesting in reading, I posted this just over a year ago when I was considering retiring in June of 2018 or March of 2019:

One More Year

The funniest comment of all was me talking about "the ease of the job".  My best person dropped a surprise resignation two weeks later *facepalm*.   Two other nice pieces about one more year decisions are included in that post.

This was also shared around today on Rockstar Finance from someone in the same industry as me, very appropriate for the threads.

Senioritis FI

Instead of grinding out the last month of work and taking the vacation days as payout, I'm sitting on a balcony waiting for the sun to rise and listening to waves.   Only a day into vacation but I am so done with work.


gerardc

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1866 on: February 16, 2019, 01:20:52 AM »
Good streak in the last few posts...

I'm having a bit of trouble when considering my sister, GF, and other family members seemingly struggling @ $30k/year, and how fast I could earn money to pay their downpayment, or spare them a few decades of boring work... or how I could provide my kids with the "good life", instead of living on a poverty $40k/year 4% WR for the rest of our lives, and forcing them to "make it" like I had to, maybe with less luck than I had... it does feel a bit selfish of me to declare that my ass sitting around on a beach enjoying life is more important than 1 short year of additional work...

Especially since, surprisingly since I've decided I would stop work soon, work actually seems more bearable. I am more detached, am working fewer hours, way less stressed, and my preparation for FIRE made me adopt a lifestyle after all compatible with work life, for the most part. I am hoping I can take a leave of a few months, then maybe I'd be willing to do another 6 months and/or work remotely, in order to lock in one more year of sweet 401k + Roth max contributions...

Most likely sticking to the plan, but just thinking out loud.

Parizade

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1867 on: February 16, 2019, 06:27:41 AM »
Good streak in the last few posts...

I'm having a bit of trouble when considering my sister, GF, and other family members seemingly struggling @ $30k/year, and how fast I could earn money to pay their downpayment, or spare them a few decades of boring work... or how I could provide my kids with the "good life", instead of living on a poverty $40k/year 4% WR for the rest of our lives, and forcing them to "make it" like I had to, maybe with less luck than I had... it does feel a bit selfish of me to declare that my ass sitting around on a beach enjoying life is more important than 1 short year of additional work...


Funny you should say this, I was having similar feelings about my son and his wife, struggling to pay back student loans and raise a child. Then I get a call, he's just accepted a cushy new job in a new city, together he and his wife will be making more than 200K/yr.

Pffft, they can start worrying about working extra years to take of me!

chasesfish

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1868 on: February 16, 2019, 08:31:19 AM »
@gerardc and @Parizade

I have some of these family issues/pressures too.  My situation might be a little unique because I'm earning money 1,000 miles away from them.  I ultimately decided at some point my time I can spend with them becomes more valuable than giving them money.

It was part of the decision not to just stop at $1.25mil or $1.5mil in total money saved so I can have means if I really do need to help them with money

Zoot

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1869 on: February 16, 2019, 09:10:04 AM »
If it makes you feel any better, there are several forum members on the "2M to 3M and beyond" thread that express the same issues that you have.

At some point, you just have to pull the ripcord and bail out.  "Enough" by John Bogle is a helpful read.

Thanks to the pointer to the $2M-$3M thread; I've been participating off and on in the $500K-$1M and $1M-$2M threads, but I think I may go spy on the $2M crowd--because you're right, it will likely help to see them spinning around the same issues.  At some point, it's not about money--even when you have enough, or MORE than enough, there's something inside which says there will never be "enough" to keep you safe from whatever it is you fear.

Thanks also for the pointer to the book--I will definitely give it a look.

As to FIRE, come on in, the water is warm, welcoming and generally great!

Soon.  Not VERY soon, but soon.  I posted in the 2026 cohort thread that January 2, 2026 (the second day of the year in which I will turn 59 1/2) is the absolute last day I will work.  My goal is to OLY the heck out that date multiple times over, though.  :)


Zoot, well said, most peoples root cause of not FIREing
            "It's fear.  Abject fear.  Fear of being penniless, homeless, resource-less.  Irrational?  Probably.  But convince the scared child inside me that it's irrational.  Go ahead.  I'll wait.  ;-) "

Sorry I don't have time to psychoanalyze the scared child/ bag-lady etc.   I'm having too much fun in FIRE.

I got a good chuckle out of this.  :)

In all seriousness, though, pretty much nothing anyone can say to my Inner Bag Lady will convince her--I myself am the only one who can dislodge her from her place in my psyche.  She's mine, and mine alone, to conquer.  :)

exit2019

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1870 on: February 16, 2019, 02:23:22 PM »
Can someone point to the "2M to 3M and beyond" thread mentioned above?  I looked but cannot find it.  I am curious to read it.

gerardc

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1871 on: February 16, 2019, 02:47:21 PM »
@gerardc and @Parizade

I have some of these family issues/pressures too.  My situation might be a little unique because I'm earning money 1,000 miles away from them.  I ultimately decided at some point my time I can spend with them becomes more valuable than giving them money.

It was part of the decision not to just stop at $1.25mil or $1.5mil in total money saved so I can have means if I really do need to help them with money

Yeah, going to $2m eventually might be nice, but then I think it's fair to downshift and get there "eventually" instead of rushing, seeing as they're not even rushing themselves... why would I.

shuffler

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1872 on: February 16, 2019, 04:12:42 PM »
Can someone point to the "2M to 3M and beyond" thread mentioned above?  I looked but cannot find it.  I am curious to read it.
Google is your friend:
https://www.google.com/search?q="2M+to+3M+and+beyond"+site%3Aforum.mrmoneymustache.com

Bateaux

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1873 on: February 16, 2019, 07:06:02 PM »
Can someone point to the "2M to 3M and beyond" thread mentioned above?  I looked but cannot find it.  I am curious to read it.

Come on over.  It's under "Throw Down the Gauntlet"

Some of us have more money than sense.

exit2019

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1874 on: February 16, 2019, 11:51:33 PM »
Can someone point to the "2M to 3M and beyond" thread mentioned above?  I looked but cannot find it.  I am curious to read it.
Google is your friend:
https://www.google.com/search?q="2M+to+3M+and+beyond"+site%3Aforum.mrmoneymustache.com

Thanks.  I used the search with no luck; yay google.

okonumiyaki

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1875 on: February 17, 2019, 02:01:12 AM »
Resignation letter in on Friday.  Three month notice period - but we will probably mutually agree a mid June date (I have a conference to organise end May)

In a way, it is a FU story too - I was about to be put on a performance plan, and this saves us all the hassle.  My heart hasn't been in it for some time - and it shows, but was waiting for my wife's cancer treatment to be completed, which it is.

Issue will be that my wife does think this will be a sabbatic, rather than full on retirement (she may be right - we will see if I get bored without structured employment)  So at the moment, not planning permanent changes.

Plan is to stay in Singapore until mid September, then split time Perth & Bali.

Numbers - 4.5-4.8m USD investments (uncertainty is on value of a business that my wife is a sleeping partner in - asset value or potential sale value), and paid for apartment in Perth.  UK pension at age 67 - but depending where we are living, this will likely be frozen at that time, and not increased over time, unless we re-locate to UK

I am 49, wife is 46.  No kids (not by choice as it happens)

It is a large weight off my mind. 

My father retired at 52 (very happily - my parents were OG FIRE) - one sister retired in her mid 40's from stressful/ lucrative job (investment banking), and my other sister has just started part time teaching, absolutely on her terms, after a few years off.  So I think it runs in the genes!


Trifle

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1876 on: February 17, 2019, 03:01:14 AM »
Resignation letter in on Friday.  Three month notice period - but we will probably mutually agree a mid June date.

Welcome and congratulations @okonomiyaki!  Got you added to the list on the previous page for mid June.  Your story is very interesting, and it does sound like FIRE runs in your genes. (Mine too.  My dad and younger brother are both FIRE-ees.)  Best of luck to your wife in her recovery. 
« Last Edit: February 17, 2019, 03:05:11 AM by Trifele »

Loren Ver

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1877 on: February 17, 2019, 10:43:54 AM »
Wow, while I was on vacation this thread has exploded.

Congrats to those that have confirmed, or have confirmed a date!  So exciting.  Please visit and let us know how things are going!
Congrats to those that have joined the cohort!  It is a great year and we have plenty of room to fit you in.  I am a little sad that I am getting pushed further down the list, but I'll bear the weight if that means more in the party.  I am just a sweetheart like that :).

To those having doubts.  DH and I were talking about that last night.  I am starting to fill the pressure and the pull of my income.   If I was making more income then it would be even harder.  To walk away from a very good stable salary is pretty crazy.  I never really thought I would ever make this much, at a good company.  I am making peanuts compared to many here (and my IRL friends) but I am well above the US median family income.  I'm glad we have a plan and a date or I would not be able to walk away.  Now are are just following the plan.  I am also glad we cut of years from the original plan ( it was 2022, when I turned 40, and has been dropping steadily) before I realized how crazy the plan was.  Now we just need to follow the plan.

Six more weeks.  I'll be giving notice sooner rather than later, I just don't know when.

LV

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1878 on: February 18, 2019, 02:43:42 PM »
I have around 6 weeks left to go...

I re-read the forum's pre-fire checklist located over in the "Post-FIRE" section.  Feeling pretty good that I haven't missed anything.  Met with our financial advisor last week to talk about "flipping the switch" from making investments each month to getting a paycheck from them.  Seems so strange to go from putting everything we can away to taking some out.  We still have kids at home and the DH still wants to work so we will still invest in his 401k and the kids college funds.  So glad I found this forum (and the use of Personal Capital) to track our expenses.  We are FATfire as far as expenses go, but tracking closely for the last few years let us know the level of supplemental funding we would need.  Financial advisor recommended paying off our mortgage depending on how the taxes come out this year.  We are pondering whether we should.  Interest rate is 3 3/8% and you can make 2.5% in a money market account, more on the open market.  Will talk more with the tax accountant too.  With such little left to pay off, don't think it matters either way.

Still working through my decompression stage plan...any of those recently retired in the cohort want to share how they are planning(or purposely not planning) their days?  I am hoping by April it will be warmer in my neck of the woods to spend a lot of time on my yard/outside of the house.


Miss Piggy

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1879 on: February 18, 2019, 03:26:18 PM »
I have around 6 weeks left to go...


No fair. 10 posts in, and you're already ready to go!  ;)

2Birds1Stone

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1880 on: February 18, 2019, 06:13:23 PM »
No fair. 10 posts in, and you're already ready to go!  ;)

How do you think an unretired walrus feels?

Lews Therin

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1881 on: February 18, 2019, 07:30:25 PM »
Tusk-y?

Linea_Norway

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1882 on: February 19, 2019, 01:19:17 AM »
I have around 6 weeks left to go...

I re-read the forum's pre-fire checklist located over in the "Post-FIRE" section.  Feeling pretty good that I haven't missed anything.  Met with our financial advisor last week to talk about "flipping the switch" from making investments each month to getting a paycheck from them.  Seems so strange to go from putting everything we can away to taking some out.  We still have kids at home and the DH still wants to work so we will still invest in his 401k and the kids college funds.  So glad I found this forum (and the use of Personal Capital) to track our expenses.  We are FATfire as far as expenses go, but tracking closely for the last few years let us know the level of supplemental funding we would need.  Financial advisor recommended paying off our mortgage depending on how the taxes come out this year.  We are pondering whether we should.  Interest rate is 3 3/8% and you can make 2.5% in a money market account, more on the open market.  Will talk more with the tax accountant too.  With such little left to pay off, don't think it matters either way.

Still working through my decompression stage plan...any of those recently retired in the cohort want to share how they are planning(or purposely not planning) their days?  I am hoping by April it will be warmer in my neck of the woods to spend a lot of time on my yard/outside of the house.

About whether or not to pay down the mortgage is discussed several places of this forum. There are pros and cons, so you can just choose. Paying down the mortgage is the most secure form for saving, but not guaranteed to give the best possible growth of your money. It is your choice.

Maybe you can work towards cutting out the financial advisor. MMMers tend to manage their own finances. An advisor has a cost and often also a private agenda for recommending certain investments. We just invest into the cheapest funds. With a bit of own study, you can manage your own stuff.

Trifle

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1883 on: February 19, 2019, 03:17:07 AM »
Still working through my decompression stage plan...any of those recently retired in the cohort want to share how they are planning(or purposely not planning) their days? 

I'm less than a month in, and have been mostly taking it easy.  I didn't know what to expect as far as decompression, so I didn't plan anything special for the first couple months.  I set a few simple goals to accomplish each day -- lots of sleep, lots of exercise, lots of time outside, eat well.  So far so good.   Feeling good physically and no psychological issues have come up yet.  I'm really enjoying the slower pace and just having the time to think.

On another topic, still waiting to hear from @Cycling Stache on his status.  We have quite a large group on deck for March, with @exit2019 and @chasesfish up next -- less than a month to go.  Are you two still on target? 


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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1884 on: February 19, 2019, 07:46:12 AM »
Still working through my decompression stage plan...any of those recently retired in the cohort want to share how they are planning(or purposely not planning) their days? 

I'm less than a month in, and have been mostly taking it easy.  I didn't know what to expect as far as decompression, so I didn't plan anything special for the first couple months.  I set a few simple goals to accomplish each day -- lots of sleep, lots of exercise, lots of time outside, eat well.  So far so good.   Feeling good physically and no psychological issues have come up yet.  I'm really enjoying the slower pace and just having the time to think.

I was looking forward to this, but my son and his wife have asked for my assistance as they transition their careers and lives to a new city so I will be a full time Grandma for the first 6 weeks of my retirement. Not complaining as I will certainly get lots of exercise and lots of time outside. The decompression will likely be postponed however, entertaining a preschooler will be much more challenging than my corporate gig.

chasesfish

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1885 on: February 19, 2019, 08:42:54 AM »
@Trifele - Still on target.  Notice will be delivered on March 18th and expect to be walked out the door that day/week.

Parizade

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1886 on: February 19, 2019, 11:02:59 AM »
WOW!!! Just got a call from the senior vice president over my work area to talk about my retirement. He wants me to transition all my project work to others over the next few weeks so I can work exclusively on a corporate culture project with him in my final 3 months! This has been my unofficial area of expertise over that past 5 years as senior leaders have come to rely on my "emotional intelligence" as much as my professional skills, but I never imagined this would be what they want me to focus on at the end of my career. It's absolutely brilliant, I couldn't be happier.

Trifle

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1887 on: February 19, 2019, 11:07:45 AM »
WOW!!! Just got a call from the senior vice president over my work area to talk about my retirement. He wants me to transition all my project work to others over the next few weeks so I can work exclusively on a corporate culture project with him in my final 3 months! This has been my unofficial area of expertise over that past 5 years as senior leaders have come to rely on my "emotional intelligence" as much as my professional skills, but I never imagined this would be what they want me to focus on at the end of my career. It's absolutely brilliant, I couldn't be happier.

Congrats @Parizade!  Way to go, ending things on a happy high note.   

2Birds1Stone

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1888 on: February 19, 2019, 05:11:32 PM »
That's so freaking awesome @Parizade!

A company that cares about culture and people will do great things.....

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1889 on: February 19, 2019, 06:28:52 PM »
I'm trying to decide what to do this year.  I think I have enough to retire.  But I have a pretty good gig, I get 21 weeks off of work per year, mostly when I want them, I try not to take more than 7 consecutive weeks.  Pay is in the 6 figures even at part time.  Job also comes with health insurance, I'm paying around $100 a month.

But sometimes I get depressed about work or super annoyed by something.  Work also contributes to seditary lifestyle (but I really need to start working to improve this). 

A big bonus is coming at the end of March so it would be stupid to leave before then. 

I've worked at the company for 13 years so I sort of want to give them ample notice.  Also, one guy that is the closest in experience (over 30 years) is likely going to retire this year so they really would hurt if we both left in a short period of time. 

Thoughts?  I was planning on leaving around April 1, but there are a couple other occassions thru the year that also might be good stop dates (like trip in May for family things, I don't mind working remote, though) and a big trip to South America and Antarctica in the fall.  If I quite, I could spend months down there.  If I don't quit, I'd be limited to about 7 weeks.


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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1890 on: February 19, 2019, 06:49:17 PM »
I'm trying to decide what to do this year.  I think I have enough to retire.  But I have a pretty good gig, I get 21 weeks off of work per year, mostly when I want them, I try not to take more than 7 consecutive weeks.  Pay is in the 6 figures even at part time.  Job also comes with health insurance, I'm paying around $100 a month.

You should definitely quit. And then immediately PM me the company name and role so I can apply for the job. :)

Parizade

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1891 on: February 19, 2019, 06:54:26 PM »
Congrats @Parizade!  Way to go, ending things on a happy high note.
Thanks Trifele, I feel very fortunate

That's so freaking awesome @Parizade!

A company that cares about culture and people will do great things.....

Thanks 2Birds1Stone, I agree (though they sure are making it hard to walk away!)
« Last Edit: February 20, 2019, 12:22:39 PM by Parizade »

FIRE 20/20

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1892 on: February 19, 2019, 08:54:13 PM »
I'm trying to decide what to do this year.  I think I have enough to retire.  But I have a pretty good gig, I get 21 weeks off of work per year, mostly when I want them, I try not to take more than 7 consecutive weeks.  Pay is in the 6 figures even at part time.  Job also comes with health insurance, I'm paying around $100 a month.

But sometimes I get depressed about work or super annoyed by something.  Work also contributes to seditary lifestyle (but I really need to start working to improve this). 

A big bonus is coming at the end of March so it would be stupid to leave before then. 

I've worked at the company for 13 years so I sort of want to give them ample notice.  Also, one guy that is the closest in experience (over 30 years) is likely going to retire this year so they really would hurt if we both left in a short period of time. 

Thoughts?  I was planning on leaving around April 1, but there are a couple other occassions thru the year that also might be good stop dates (like trip in May for family things, I don't mind working remote, though) and a big trip to South America and Antarctica in the fall.  If I quite, I could spend months down there.  If I don't quit, I'd be limited to about 7 weeks.

What would your withdrawal rate be?  Would it be lean or fat FIRE?  Is there a charity or family member you could help if you worked a bit too long?  Could you get back into a similar work arrangement if you quit but needed to return in a few years?

If you're at a 4% or higher withdrawal rate and you'd be in a lean FIRE situation, then I'd keep going with the current situation.  But if you're under a 3.5% withdrawal rate and have a fat-FIRE sized 'stache, then I'd give them notice as soon as the bonus hits your bank account.  One other thing to consider is how strong your negotiating position is.  If they provide you with 21 weeks off each year, maybe a few days after the other person retires you could tender your resignation.  My guess is that they would offer you anything to hold onto you for a little while longer.  Maybe you could negotiate even more time off, a one-time bonus, or fewer hours during the 31 weeks you are working.  What's the worst that could happen - they say no and you happily FIRE? 

@Trifele , can you update my FIRE date to April 26?  It could still slip to May if I find out that my company health insurance will last until the end of the month of my last day, but I've heard through the rumor mill that it expires on your last day.  I don't want to ask that question yet, so I'm temporarily targeting April 26.  We'll see if it slips into the first week in May. 
« Last Edit: February 19, 2019, 09:31:39 PM by FIRE 20/20 »

Daisy

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1893 on: February 19, 2019, 09:14:15 PM »
Since this is where I posted about my termination last week, this is where I'll share this story. The corporate announcement of my departure came out yesterday. Nice and vague that I will be leaving to "pursue other opportunities". So in the lunch room today I got asked where I am going next. 
My response was "Skiing".
Awkward pause and lack of comprehension
"No where is your next position?"
"Chairlift."
"No where are you going to work next."
"Well I have a season pass at Alta, so that is where I will be working on my turns. Enjoy your lunch." mic drop and exit. 7 more days.
I love awkward conversations and relish the long pause.

I was catching up on your messages since I might be meeting you in SLC.

I love this post!

It was similar to my parting conversations at work after FIREing in 2017.

"Where are you going to?"
- "Anywhere and nowhere"

"What are you going to do with all of that time?"
- Just smiled back and thought "you must be a boring person if you have to ask me a question like that". I love repeating that question to myself while out doing fun things in nature without the pressure of time.

I especially like your answer of your position being "chairlift".

I also titled it as more of a sabbatical to casual acquaintances at work and elsewhere so as not to get into any specifics. To others I say, a frugal early retirement, if I can pull it off. Makes them more comfortable with the situation and they have no idea how much I have saved.

Trifle

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1894 on: February 20, 2019, 04:00:10 AM »
Thanks for the cross-post @Daisy!  I remember when Bognish FIREd (I was lurking on the 2018 thread), and his post was hilarious.   

Got you moved on the list @FIRE 20/20.  (Previous page list is current).  Thanks for the update.

Loren Ver

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1895 on: February 20, 2019, 04:56:26 AM »
okay, I have my one on one (phone) meeting with new boss today.  I have decided I am going to give notice.  I am going to ask for a severance, but don't expect one.  Maybe there will be some negotiation.  This is awkward for me since he has only been my boss a little while, we've never met, and I've only talked on the phone to him once to introduce myself in January. 

There is a small risk, since I am telling him weeks in advance.  But the company now as even more hoops that were just set up, and I don't feel like jumping right now.

LV

Linea_Norway

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1896 on: February 20, 2019, 05:01:53 AM »
okay, I have my one on one (phone) meeting with new boss today.  I have decided I am going to give notice.  I am going to ask for a severance, but don't expect one.  Maybe there will be some negotiation.  This is awkward for me since he has only been my boss a little while, we've never met, and I've only talked on the phone to him once to introduce myself in January. 

There is a small risk, since I am telling him weeks in advance.  But the company now as even more hoops that were just set up, and I don't feel like jumping right now.

LV

Good luck.
You should preferably have done this in a real life meeting, but I understand it is more hassle.

Loren Ver

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1897 on: February 20, 2019, 05:19:14 AM »
okay, I have my one on one (phone) meeting with new boss today.  I have decided I am going to give notice.  I am going to ask for a severance, but don't expect one.  Maybe there will be some negotiation.  This is awkward for me since he has only been my boss a little while, we've never met, and I've only talked on the phone to him once to introduce myself in January. 

There is a small risk, since I am telling him weeks in advance.  But the company now as even more hoops that were just set up, and I don't feel like jumping right now.

LV

Good luck.
You should preferably have done this in a real life meeting, but I understand it is more hassle.

Totally agree.  I have been waiting for a real life meeting, but he wasn't planning on visiting until some time in March.  Then the company just put on travel restrictions so it might not be until the end of March (or April or later).  Ugh.

 

Trifle

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1898 on: February 20, 2019, 07:39:10 AM »
okay, I have my one on one (phone) meeting with new boss today.  I have decided I am going to give notice.  I am going to ask for a severance, but don't expect one.  Maybe there will be some negotiation.  This is awkward for me since he has only been my boss a little while, we've never met, and I've only talked on the phone to him once to introduce myself in January. 

There is a small risk, since I am telling him weeks in advance.  But the company now as even more hoops that were just set up, and I don't feel like jumping right now.

LV

Good luck.
You should preferably have done this in a real life meeting, but I understand it is more hassle.

Totally agree.  I have been waiting for a real life meeting, but he wasn't planning on visiting until some time in March.  Then the company just put on travel restrictions so it might not be until the end of March (or April or later).  Ugh.
 

Good luck @Loren Ver!  It's a weird situation, but you've got it.  :) 

itchyfeet

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Re: 2019 fire cohort
« Reply #1899 on: February 20, 2019, 08:14:38 AM »
Things have really heated up here in Class of 2019. We’ll done to all of you awesome people chasing down your dreams.

My FIRE planning has taken a leap forward. I flew to HQ to meet with top mgt. I found out I wouldn’t be getting THE big promotion this year, but rather “in the next few years”.

With the uncertainty of where I would be working in the coming months resolved, and career temptations removed , I can really focus solely on getting to my number and FIREing ASAP.

June is definitely off the table as I’m not happy quitting with around 90% of my number whilst Sydney house prices are still dropping, given my FIRE plans are quite heavily reliant on selling out of Sydney. I’d like to see the floor of this correction if possible before FIREing.

December remains very possible..... and very appealing.