Author Topic: On not going on holiday  (Read 19771 times)

Jade

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On not going on holiday
« on: May 09, 2024, 08:10:56 AM »
Hi all,

Hubby and my I both did a lot of travelling before meeting and together after but we don't go away now. This has evolved for lots of reasons so we don't need convincing we can or "should" go on holidays etc but would like to hear other people's experiences creating a relaxing and enjoyable life without taking holidays.. how do you do that, how you frame it in your mind etc? we also live in a holiday destination which helps. we loved travelling before but also noticed, now when we talk about not taking holidays, a lot of people don't get it or have negative associations like not being outward looking if you don't travel etc.

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #1 on: May 09, 2024, 11:42:57 AM »
I wonder if the negative reactions are people who wanted to talk about their own travels, and didn't get the chance?

When this came up recently for me, I said I hadn't traveled in awhile, and then talked about where I traveled previously.

Jade

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #2 on: May 09, 2024, 11:55:03 AM »
Possibly. I think we often find ourselves so far out of how a lot of people live their lives (because of FIRE, not holidaying, no kids etc) that it's hard to find common ground but good suggestion.

tygertygertyger

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #3 on: May 09, 2024, 12:21:12 PM »
Yeah. I used to love travelling, and I still do enjoy it.

When I focused a lot on travel, I didn't like commuting to work 5 days a week, and sometimes my job was okay but I didn't like working full time. So travelling - both planning a trip and then actually going - was an enjoyable hobby. I used to need something to look forward to.

These days - and largely since Covid - I realize I enjoy my day to day life so much. I like waking up next to my partner, and I like that sooner or later, our dog nudges open the door to see if we're ready for our morning family walk. I work from home, and much of my job is enjoyable. My partner and I are transforming our yard into a friendly habitat/food forest for ourselves and wildlife.

I just don't need the escape like I used to.

But I don't know if these are good talking points with other people. I wouldn't assume that other people use travel like an escape, or that their daily lives must be dreary! I'm mostly happy to talk about their trips or mine from the past.

I feel a bit more dissonance since realizing that I prefer not jetting the world for environmental reasons, while some travel-loving friends are enjoying multiple international trips a year... but again, I don't get into it with them. We all make our own decisions.

Jade

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #4 on: May 09, 2024, 01:03:02 PM »
Thanks tygertygertyger - good to hear your experiences. Your daily life sounds cool. Ours is similar if you replace dog for a cat! Yeh, the environmental reasons are another thing.

It's not really so much that we talk to other people about it or even particularly want to, I guess -- just more there's no one else really talking about not holidaying in the media or otherwise. I like hearing about people who have found a day to day life they really like with less need for an escape hatch.

ixtap

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #5 on: May 09, 2024, 02:08:20 PM »
We spent about a decade with our only travel being to visit family or sail to another port and back. It really bugged people. Lots of folks told us that visiting family isn't a vacation: to them I just responded that we like our families. My mother in law was also concerned that we weren't doing more typical vacations, in particular skiing. That was mostly because they have great family memories of skiing. There is enough difference in children's ages that there aren't that many memories of the whole family.

We have recently started more traditional vacations again, but will probably go a year and a half from our vacation in a couple of weeks to our next one. We live in coastal Southern California and plan to spend next winter cruising in Mexico, so life is a bit of a vacation.

Jade

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #6 on: May 09, 2024, 02:13:33 PM »
We spent about a decade with our only travel being to visit family or sail to another port and back. It really bugged people. Lots of folks told us that visiting family isn't a vacation: to them I just responded that we like our families. My mother in law was also concerned that we weren't doing more typical vacations, in particular skiing. That was mostly because they have great family memories of skiing. There is enough difference in children's ages that there aren't that many memories of the whole family.

We have recently started more traditional vacations again, but will probably go a year and a half from our vacation in a couple of weeks to our next one. We live in coastal Southern California and plan to spend next winter cruising in Mexico, so life is a bit of a vacation.

"Life is a bit of a vacation" sounds good! Thanks for sharing.

The typical vacation does seem like something a lot of folk are invested in.

We're happy with how we're doing things, I guess it's good to share stories of doing it in a less "traditional" manner.

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #7 on: May 09, 2024, 02:34:34 PM »
...would like to hear other people's experiences creating a relaxing and enjoyable life without taking holidays.. how do you do that, how you frame it in your mind etc?

I spend/spent a considerable amount of time and money making my home as comfortable as possible, full of fun and nice things, and in an area that I like.  I intend to enjoy it!

My spouse, on the other hand, persuades me to start big renovation projects and then fills in every weekend with plans for us to zip around the state.  My interpretation: They do not find the house comfortable (want me to keep making it nicer).  They do not find it to be full of fun and nice things after spending all day in it caring for a child.  And they have no particular attraction to the area.  Hence, they seize any opportunity to go elsewhere!

hooplady

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #8 on: May 09, 2024, 07:13:13 PM »
I rankle at anything that other people think I "should" do. I was never much of a traveler, mainly because I tended to get a migraine which ruined at least a day or two. And in following in the fine American tradition, it was very hard to un-plug for the whole time, or deal with the resultant backlog of work upon my return. I also never subscribed to the idea that one should rush around the globe in an effort to relieve the stress of one's job. Far preferable to save my pennies and retire from said job as soon as possible. Since retirement I no longer get migraines and have only taken one trip (to see family).

If you truly have a passion for travel then by all means do it as often as you can. But don't let anyone tell you you're supposed to.

Freedomin5

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #9 on: May 09, 2024, 09:10:25 PM »
To me, there is a difference between "going on holiday" and "taking a holiday" and "traveling".

I define "take a holiday" as "being away from work". We absolutely take holidays, especially when DD is also on holiday from school. That does not necessarily mean that we "go on holiday/travel" during the time. Most of the time, we take time off work but do not travel. Instead we putter around the house and visit local destinations like local parks and restaurants. Where we live, it's a terrible idea to travel during national holidays, as the train stations and airports are typically packed with people.

We also have created a home that is relaxing, peaceful, quiet, and comfortable, so we don't actually want to leave home very much. DD's favorite thing is to lounge in bed and read a book (she gets that from her parents).

The other thing we do is visit our parents, but again, we make that as comfortable as possible. We purchased a cottage, so the only traveling we do is up to our cottage.

For us, being on vacation is about rest and rejuvenation, and no one has ever made fun of us or not gotten it when we tell them we're going to hang out at home for a staycation, or we're going to the cottage for some peace and quiet. They also tend to be quite receptive when we invite them to our cottage for their own R&R experience.

former player

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #10 on: May 10, 2024, 03:21:37 AM »
This is me.  I live in a holiday destination, I've put money and effort into having a beautiful (to me) and comfortable home, I have a dog and walk with him and with friends around the local area.  I don't need to go anywhere else.

I did travel for holidays when still working, and it was definitely a needed escape from work and daily life and a change from the place I was living in (I was there only because that was where my specific job was).  But I stopped flying for holidays in 2001 for environmental reasons and have no intention of doing it ever again.  I occasionally (every other year or so) go away to a city for a few days by train, to see friends and do cultural things.  I'm lucky in that family live close or visit nearby regularly.

I don't really notice any comeback from others about not travelling.  I have friends who are constantly pinging round the country or are off abroad and it suits them but not me, not any more.

PhilB

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #11 on: May 10, 2024, 03:54:12 AM »
I'm somewhere in the middle.  We still love travelling, and plan to do a lot once #2 heads off to Uni, but also love it here.  We plan to largely stay home in the summer holidays, laze in the hammocks and swim in the local rivers, then do all our travelling during school term time when it's cheaper and less crowded.

It's important to lay down memories as you go through life.  Holidays can be good for this, but as long as you have enough other things in your life they are by no means essential.

Jade

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #12 on: May 10, 2024, 04:14:27 AM »
...would like to hear other people's experiences creating a relaxing and enjoyable life without taking holidays.. how do you do that, how you frame it in your mind etc?

I spend/spent a considerable amount of time and money making my home as comfortable as possible, full of fun and nice things, and in an area that I like.  I intend to enjoy it!

My spouse, on the other hand, persuades me to start big renovation projects and then fills in every weekend with plans for us to zip around the state.  My interpretation: They do not find the house comfortable (want me to keep making it nicer).  They do not find it to be full of fun and nice things after spending all day in it caring for a child.  And they have no particular attraction to the area.  Hence, they seize any opportunity to go elsewhere!

Interesting Bartlebooth! I hope you find a way that suits you both. I do think we're brought up in Western society that the grass is always greener and it's a hard habit to break.

Jade

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #13 on: May 10, 2024, 04:17:08 AM »
I rankle at anything that other people think I "should" do. I was never much of a traveler, mainly because I tended to get a migraine which ruined at least a day or two. And in following in the fine American tradition, it was very hard to un-plug for the whole time, or deal with the resultant backlog of work upon my return. I also never subscribed to the idea that one should rush around the globe in an effort to relieve the stress of one's job. Far preferable to save my pennies and retire from said job as soon as possible. Since retirement I no longer get migraines and have only taken one trip (to see family).

If you truly have a passion for travel then by all means do it as often as you can. But don't let anyone tell you you're supposed to.

I'm quite sensitive and a people pleaser in recovery lol but am beginning to rankle against the "shoulds" too! Hubby's health is one of the pros to not having a holiday, like with your migraines. When the costs outweigh the benefits, it does become a no brainer.

Jade

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #14 on: May 10, 2024, 04:23:57 AM »
To me, there is a difference between "going on holiday" and "taking a holiday" and "traveling".

I define "take a holiday" as "being away from work". We absolutely take holidays, especially when DD is also on holiday from school. That does not necessarily mean that we "go on holiday/travel" during the time. Most of the time, we take time off work but do not travel. Instead we putter around the house and visit local destinations like local parks and restaurants. Where we live, it's a terrible idea to travel during national holidays, as the train stations and airports are typically packed with people.

We also have created a home that is relaxing, peaceful, quiet, and comfortable, so we don't actually want to leave home very much. DD's favorite thing is to lounge in bed and read a book (she gets that from her parents).

The other thing we do is visit our parents, but again, we make that as comfortable as possible. We purchased a cottage, so the only traveling we do is up to our cottage.

For us, being on vacation is about rest and rejuvenation, and no one has ever made fun of us or not gotten it when we tell them we're going to hang out at home for a staycation, or we're going to the cottage for some peace and quiet. They also tend to be quite receptive when we invite them to our cottage for their own R&R experience.

I work VERY part time and hubby is FIREd so we are away from work but not travelling most of the time.

It sounds like you've created positive habits for your DD too.

Reflecting on what I write, I don't know if it's so much about what other people think or that we're aware we live so differently to a lot of people around us. for e.g. we live in the smallest house in the village but opposite us are lots of mcmansions, 4x4s, flash holidays etc. we have a few friends who are frugal like us so its not like we resent others or want differently, just observe a lot of difference i guess.

Jade

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #15 on: May 10, 2024, 04:26:35 AM »
This is me.  I live in a holiday destination, I've put money and effort into having a beautiful (to me) and comfortable home, I have a dog and walk with him and with friends around the local area.  I don't need to go anywhere else.

I did travel for holidays when still working, and it was definitely a needed escape from work and daily life and a change from the place I was living in (I was there only because that was where my specific job was).  But I stopped flying for holidays in 2001 for environmental reasons and have no intention of doing it ever again.  I occasionally (every other year or so) go away to a city for a few days by train, to see friends and do cultural things.  I'm lucky in that family live close or visit nearby regularly.

I don't really notice any comeback from others about not travelling.  I have friends who are constantly pinging round the country or are off abroad and it suits them but not me, not any more.

This is closest to us. LOVED travelling earlier in life and definitely needed that escape. I guess that's a positive that, like you, we don't need that exit so much now.
« Last Edit: May 10, 2024, 04:30:13 AM by jade »

Jade

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #16 on: May 10, 2024, 04:29:03 AM »
I'm somewhere in the middle.  We still love travelling, and plan to do a lot once #2 heads off to Uni, but also love it here.  We plan to largely stay home in the summer holidays, laze in the hammocks and swim in the local rivers, then do all our travelling during school term time when it's cheaper and less crowded.

It's important to lay down memories as you go through life.  Holidays can be good for this, but as long as you have enough other things in your life they are by no means essential.

I like what you said about laying down memories PhilB. We're doing that and I feel so fortunate with where we're at geographically and in life, with the help of FIRE.

BTW which area do you live in? I'm sure you've mentioned it before but the river swimming sounds so appealing... We have rivers where I am but I don't think they're swimmable unfortunately...

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #17 on: May 10, 2024, 04:30:50 AM »
Reflecting on what I write, I don't know if it's so much about what other people think or that we're aware we live so differently to a lot of people around us. for e.g. we live in the smallest house in the village but opposite us are lots of mcmansions, 4x4s, flash holidays etc. we have a few friends who are frugal like us so its not like we resent others or want differently, just observe a lot of difference i guess.
I think there's a tendency for people to sort themselves into homogenous groups and then they find that a constant reminder that other people sort themselves into contrasting or conflicting groups is unsettling - probably because they don't have the theory that explains the practise. You seem to have it sorted, but I suspect the people in the mansions, if they think at all, have this problem.
« Last Edit: May 10, 2024, 04:50:23 AM by former player »

Jade

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #18 on: May 10, 2024, 04:51:50 AM »
Reflecting on what I write, I don't know if it's so much about what other people think or that we're aware we live so differently to a lot of people around us. for e.g. we live in the smallest house in the village but opposite us are lots of mcmansions, 4x4s, flash holidays etc. we have a few friends who are frugal like us so its not like we resent others or want differently, just observe a lot of difference i guess.
I think there's a tendency for people to sort themselves into homogenous groups and then they find that a constant reminder that other people sort themselves into contrasting or conflicting groups is unsettling - probably because they don't have the theory that explains the practise.

Yep! That's it. We have and are finding like mind people which is great. I guess not having kids, holidays SBS working much means we have quite different things to talk about than a lot of people.

PhilB

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #19 on: May 10, 2024, 05:04:03 AM »
I'm somewhere in the middle.  We still love travelling, and plan to do a lot once #2 heads off to Uni, but also love it here.  We plan to largely stay home in the summer holidays, laze in the hammocks and swim in the local rivers, then do all our travelling during school term time when it's cheaper and less crowded.

It's important to lay down memories as you go through life.  Holidays can be good for this, but as long as you have enough other things in your life they are by no means essential.

I like what you said about laying down memories PhilB. We're doing that and I feel so fortunate with where we're at geographically and in life, with the help of FIRE.

BTW which area do you live in? I'm sure you've mentioned it before but the river swimming sounds so appealing... We have rivers where I am but I don't think they're swimmable unfortunately...
We're near Salisbury. Mainly swimming in the Avon. Still a bit much water rushing down it this year though!

Jade

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #20 on: May 10, 2024, 05:19:20 AM »
I'm somewhere in the middle.  We still love travelling, and plan to do a lot once #2 heads off to Uni, but also love it here.  We plan to largely stay home in the summer holidays, laze in the hammocks and swim in the local rivers, then do all our travelling during school term time when it's cheaper and less crowded.

It's important to lay down memories as you go through life.  Holidays can be good for this, but as long as you have enough other things in your life they are by no means essential.

I like what you said about laying down memories PhilB. We're doing that and I feel so fortunate with where we're at geographically and in life, with the help of FIRE.

BTW which area do you live in? I'm sure you've mentioned it before but the river swimming sounds so appealing... We have rivers where I am but I don't think they're swimmable unfortunately...
We're near Salisbury. Mainly swimming in the Avon. Still a bit much water rushing down it this year though!
nice but yes.. not a shortage!

vand

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #21 on: May 15, 2024, 04:32:27 AM »
Personally I like routine, and am very much a stay at home person - My wife has to almost force me to go on holiday once a year.

I've never really understood the Brits' obsession with continual travel, whether it been 30 weekend breaks every year, or the seemingly God-given right to 3 Family holidays in Spain every year.  Baffles me the very British logic of "buy as big and expensive a house as possible, then aim to be away from it as much of the year as you can."

SpreadsheetMan

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #22 on: May 15, 2024, 04:45:11 AM »
Personally I like routine, and am very much a stay at home person - My wife has to almost force me to go on holiday once a year.

I've never really understood the Brits' obsession with continual travel, whether it been 30 weekend breaks every year, or the seemingly God-given right to 3 Family holidays in Spain every year.  Baffles me the very British logic of "buy as big and expensive a house as possible, then aim to be away from it as much of the year as you can."
I am very much like this too. One fortnight’s holiday a year and a few day trips is all I ever want, the travel bug that is endemic on this site never touched me at all.

Jade

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #23 on: May 15, 2024, 05:17:04 AM »
Personally I like routine, and am very much a stay at home person - My wife has to almost force me to go on holiday once a year.

I've never really understood the Brits' obsession with continual travel, whether it been 30 weekend breaks every year, or the seemingly God-given right to 3 Family holidays in Spain every year.  Baffles me the very British logic of "buy as big and expensive a house as possible, then aim to be away from it as much of the year as you can."
I am very much like this too. One fortnight’s holiday a year and a few day trips is all I ever want, the travel bug that is endemic on this site never touched me at all.

Ahh sweet validation. Thank you both! I think the big house and holiday thing is something very engrained in our society's consciousness. A smaller house and less time away from it on holidays often equals decades less work in most people's case. I guess the quote about creating a life you don't have to escape from in the first place is relevant here.

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #24 on: May 15, 2024, 07:35:59 AM »
Personally I like routine, and am very much a stay at home person - My wife has to almost force me to go on holiday once a year.

I've never really understood the Brits' obsession with continual travel, whether it been 30 weekend breaks every year, or the seemingly God-given right to 3 Family holidays in Spain every year.  Baffles me the very British logic of "buy as big and expensive a house as possible, then aim to be away from it as much of the year as you can."
I am very much like this too. One fortnight’s holiday a year and a few day trips is all I ever want, the travel bug that is endemic on this site never touched me at all.

This is also us, some of my wife’s family have the big house lots of travel lifestyle and we have been sucked into some of those trips and we don’t get it. I find it remarkable that no matter where they tend to go on the continent it has the same English/Irish bar that plays the football, the same food, same atmosphere of Brits with red faces etc.. I never forget going to Prague and Krakow, I kid you not I could not tell the difference same square, same church, same market, same bars etc.. Obviously we were in tourist areas but it is an eye opener.

To be honest we find it quite embarrassing! (the Brits abroad thing) We typically travel around the UK visiting friends, the Lakes, Scotland/Wales etc.. But we are both laid back and prefer relaxation over anything else.



« Last Edit: May 15, 2024, 07:53:46 AM by Affable Bear »

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #25 on: May 15, 2024, 08:09:54 AM »
I love my house.  I enjoy my neighbourhood.  I have a good time just sitting out in the back yard when it's warm.  I know the best times to go places to avoid rushes, I know when there are cool things going on in the area.  I don't ever have to deal with forgotten stuff that wasn't packed.  If the weather turns sour I don't have to worry about not having the right rain gear.  If the weather's great I can grab my bike from the garage, or my rollerblades, or I can put out the sprinkler.  I like being around my dog.

I've travelled to different far away places, but rarely have I been moved or happier than staying near where I live.  Travelling generally sucks.  I don't like the fast food you're often stuck with in airports and train stations.  I don't like the stress of trying to meet a flight or make a particular train.  I don't like being rushed when I want to stay somewhere for longer.  Seats are too small, I get hot and sweaty, ugh.

Gimme my backyard, and maybe the occasional camping trip nearby.

Jade

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #26 on: May 15, 2024, 08:48:36 AM »
Hi Affable Bear! Yeh, the Brits abroad thing isn't great.
« Last Edit: May 15, 2024, 09:35:30 AM by jade »

Jade

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #27 on: May 15, 2024, 08:53:22 AM »
Your list of pros for staying at home is similar to ours GuitarStv. We were at a local beach today and we're saying how nice it is being out mid week when things are quiet and everyone's at work too.

The benefits of sitting in your backyard is often under estimated IMO. when the beaches get too busy around us at weekends and holidays, we retreat to ours.

I loved travelling when we did it but it's good to get to this place too. Unfortunately as what we're talking about here doesn't create profit, it's often looked over. I love hearing about people's chilled out lives, pottering locally to where they live.

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #28 on: May 16, 2024, 01:13:08 PM »
I am currently dreaming of a nice holiday in the sun. I am German, so go back to see family quite a bit, but that is not a holiday for me. That is where all my holiday money is going though, on flights home to see family.
I wouldn't mind holidaying in the UK either, and have in the past, but the weather is just not holiday weather. If I have to wear a wetsuits and my children can't stay in the water for longer than 20 minutes without getting blue lips, it's just not the same. Having said that, I am recently separated with a 1 and a 4 year old and can't imagine anything worse than going abroad on holiday with them on my own :-)

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #29 on: May 16, 2024, 03:46:38 PM »
I *think* a big part of the issue is that holidays in the sun are a big part of the middle class dream. By choosing not to pursue this, you are opting out. At best, folks see this as an example of extreme frugality that will harm your mental health. More often they just cannot comprehend opting out of any of the individual components of the middle class lifestyle.

We live on our boat, don't have children, drive a 15yo car and although we currently travel a lot, at least half is to volunteer for things (just leaving LA because DH was a science fair judge), and much of the remainder is with family. We hear these kind of judgements allllll the time. Usually they are phrased in a way that just makes it so obvious the speaker is projecting that we are more bemused than offended.

Jade

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #30 on: May 17, 2024, 12:03:52 AM »
Rachel1987 we haven't got kids but yes, I wouldn't relish the idea of going abroad with kids if I had them lol! The weather can be a thing.. though I'm surprised at the really good weather we're getting already this year (though climate change eek!).

ixtap I think you hit the nail on the head about the middle class ideals and the confusion others seem to experience when we opt out of any part! For what it's worth, your lifestyle sounds interesting.. I've always hankered after the idea of living on a boat.

Where we live, there is a mix of people and lifestyles but directly opposite (our small house) are some biiiggg houses, with jaguars, mazaratis, 4x4s etc and people spending at least £30k on their kitchens -- sometimes we scratch our head at the other end of the middle class ideals... I'm pretty sure a lot of the cars are on loan etc too.
« Last Edit: May 17, 2024, 12:08:05 AM by jade »

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #31 on: May 17, 2024, 09:09:00 AM »
How does the joke go?... I get so exhausted from going on holiday that I need a holiday to recover..

other practical things that I really dislike about travel:

- I'm away from my cats
- The whole airport routine - absolutely HATE it
- It can easily take a day or longer to get to where you want to go, even when the flighttime isn't that much. And a day back. That time adds up. People wonder where their time goes - well, for a lot of people it is sitting in waiting lounges, on trains, and in airports.
- The continual packing and unpacking
- The goddamn delays

God, the stress of it all.
« Last Edit: May 17, 2024, 09:13:38 AM by vand »

Jade

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #32 on: May 17, 2024, 09:28:37 AM »
How does the joke go?... I get so exhausted from going on holiday that I need a holiday to recover..

other practical things that I really dislike about travel:

- I'm away from my cats
- The whole airport routine - absolutely HATE it
- It can easily take a day or longer to get to where you want to go, even when the flighttime isn't that much. And a day back. That time adds up. People wonder where their time goes - well, for a lot of people it is sitting in waiting lounges, on trains, and in airports.
- The continual packing and unpacking
- The goddamn delays

God, the stress of it all.

Well said. Being away from our cat is a biggie for us too.

bownyboy

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #33 on: May 23, 2024, 07:26:04 PM »
As I (we) have got older we realise what we like and want to do verses what we used or thought we wanted to do. We are a couple with no kids. We live simply, but we focus our life and spending on experiences and travel.

That means we now:

- only travel during the day when we are awake
- have a rule that we stay in one place for min 3 nights preferable 7 nights
- practice 'slow travel' which means staying longer in a place and fully immersing yourself eg one month
- do not share holidays with others (even friends). I'm sorry I like my downtime and slobbing on the sofa. I don't want to be worrying out someone else and if they are ok
- ensure that our minimum luxeries come with us (eg: one cup cafetiere for me, milk frother for my wife, hot sauce for me lol)
- do not rush to see everything, rather we stroll, meander, drink, eat and be merry :)

Jade

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #34 on: May 23, 2024, 11:46:54 PM »
As I (we) have got older we realise what we like and want to do verses what we used or thought we wanted to do. We are a couple with no kids. We live simply, but we focus our life and spending on experiences and travel.

That means we now:

- only travel during the day when we are awake
- have a rule that we stay in one place for min 3 nights preferable 7 nights
- practice 'slow travel' which means staying longer in a place and fully immersing yourself eg one month
- do not share holidays with others (even friends). I'm sorry I like my downtime and slobbing on the sofa. I don't want to be worrying out someone else and if they are ok
- ensure that our minimum luxeries come with us (eg: one cup cafetiere for me, milk frother for my wife, hot sauce for me lol)
- do not rush to see everything, rather we stroll, meander, drink, eat and be merry :)

These make a lot of sense!

jaysee

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Re: On not going on holiday
« Reply #35 on: May 28, 2024, 06:01:16 AM »
These days - and largely since Covid - I realize I enjoy my day to day life so much. I like waking up next to my partner, and I like that sooner or later, our dog nudges open the door to see if we're ready for our morning family walk. I work from home, and much of my job is enjoyable. My partner and I are transforming our yard into a friendly habitat/food forest for ourselves and wildlife.

My experience post-FIRE is very similar to this "day to day" life enjoyment that you describe!

Also most of my trips overseas to-date have been very frugal / budget-friendly anyway. It's interesting that my most treasured travel memories, right up to recent times, were from staying in hostels or very small, basic rooms or tiny old hotels. There's something I find so exciting about living a little rough and really feeling like I'm in a different place even when I can afford much better. It's easy to adapt to a small / basic living space, the main feature of a holiday for me is getting out and seeing a new country, spending much time on my feet!

 

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