Author Topic: Target FIRE: 2017  (Read 246195 times)

FrugalAussie

  • 5 O'Clock Shadow
  • *
  • Posts: 85
  • Location: Mandurah, Western Australia
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1400 on: March 14, 2018, 06:00:27 PM »

I've finally gotten into somewhat of a routine with my diet and exercise and have nearly lost 10 lbs!  I'd like to lose about 5-10 more which I think is doable over the next several months. Also I'm just happier being able to spend time in the sun everyday. Happier to spend time moving my body everyday.

I still have some unpleasant feelings when I tell people I'm not working anymore.  Everyone is very supportive but I still feel uncomfortable telling people for some reason. Especially if those people aren't very happy with their current jobs. I think I feel a bit guilty because I can live this life but they can't. Anyone else feeling FIRE-guilt (kind of like rich-guilt)?

Sacha, I'm retired about 10 months.  I'm also enjoying getting fit after many years of sitting behind a desk in a high stress job.  I think I'm decompressed but I'm still not totally into retirement.  As a social worker I'm finding it hard to let go of meaningful work.  I do volunteer, have been on the Board of our local domestic violence service for several years, I'm a community rep on another committee that I value and I donate generously to a couple of NGOs. 

I also had some guilt about our fortunate financial situation.  Yes, we have worked hard, "sacrificed" consumer wants and overcome set backs such as divorce and sole parenting however I still had the feeling that somehow I didn't deserve our success, especially as we have just had built an amazing house on the coast so people can see our success, we can't continue to understate it. It helped me to reframe my thinking.  I think everyone deserves to have a house by the sea like us, if that's what they want, but there are structures and systems in place that are barriers to that happening. While I do what I can to address those barriers eg. homelessness for families experiencing domestic violence, honestly I know I can't change the capitalist system so I can chose to opt out (which I tried when my kids were young) or utilise it to my advantage. Currently I utilise it to my advantage.

Truthfully, I'll probably go back to work at some point.  The money I earn can be put to good use.  However, as I'm now financially independent the number of hours I work and the level of stress I need to endure is reduced so I can get a much better work/life balance and by working contract I know that the work has a finite time frame.

Good luck with your music. My partner retired last year also and has embraced his long time love of Traditional Irish Music (he's originally from N Ireland) so is learning the Bodhran and the tin whistle. In November last year we went to a couple of music festivals over in Ireland.  They were fantastic, we had the best time. 
FIRE'd in 2017, aged 51. Not bored yet!

Kay-Ell

  • 5 O'Clock Shadow
  • *
  • Posts: 73
  • Semi-retired in 2017
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1401 on: March 15, 2018, 04:53:34 PM »
I'm approaching 5 months retired, and I do not think I've completed the decompression stage yet.  My family was in turmoil for the first 2.5 months of my retirement, which took all of my emotional and mental energy, every single day (and often the unproductive night time anxiety took up my nights as well).  But the the last 2.5 month, life has been getting steadily better and better.  I really do love my life, and find so much joy in the people who are most important to me.  And I'm definitely starting to find moments where I take a big deep breath and say "wow... retirement is really amazing."

I have a few struggles right now.  One is finding motivation to be productive.  I still consult, on average about 8-10 hours per week for my old company.  And even though it's easy money, that does really help (I'm at a marginal FI level, and as long as I consult I can cover my expenses 100% without touching my stash) I'm having difficulty breaking out of the old mindset of feeling trapped behind my monitor even though I know I can get up and walk outside literally anytime I want to.  I'm experimenting with different rutines like working a little bit every morning, working a little bit every day, working longer periods every other day, etc.  I think I'll find a rythm soon.  And I think I'll probably drop the consulting all together at the end of the year.

I have other areas I'd like to be more productive in.  Currently have multiple projects on two separate renovations (my primary and one of my rentals).  I've always DIY'd a lot, and expected to do that even more once retired, but am finding it harder than expected.  I am really hoping that it's a matter of simply needing more time to decompress before I find my over-achieving, self motivated personality again. 

I still have some unpleasant feelings when I tell people I'm not working anymore.  Everyone is very supportive but I still feel uncomfortable telling people for some reason. Especially if those people aren't very happy with their current jobs. I think I feel a bit guilty because I can live this life but they can't. Anyone else feeling FIRE-guilt (kind of like rich-guilt)?

I definitely feel this.  My boyfriend, who is older than I am, and looks more age appropriate for traditional "early retirement" gleefully goes around telling everyone we are retired.  And every time, I kind of cringe, and try to downplay my own retirement as only "semi retirement, taking some time off with our daughter."  I feel bad for the person hearing about my amazing fortune, even if they seem happy to hear it.  Strange isn't it, that we can spend the better part of our lives working toward this goal, and then when we achieve it, feel kind of guilty when other people hear about it?


homestead neohio

  • Pencil Stache
  • ****
  • Posts: 817
    • Journal - Seeds Sprout
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1402 on: March 16, 2018, 07:55:07 AM »
Thanks @Kay-Ell and @FrugalAussie for sharing those thoughts and feelings on decompression and sharing your retirement status with others. 

I'm in the 2018 cohort and have 7 more work days remaining.  It is getting real and I'm already starting decompression because I've been working remotely with fewer responsibilities.  I, too, am lacking motivation and hoping it will return after a likely months long decompression phase.  In the meantime it is a bit concerning, though overall I trust I will be productive again and this time in areas I choose instead of my employer.

I know zero people IRL who can relate to what I'm doing.  I know an octogenarian who up and quit a job on principle when he was young and broke and had to find work right away, which turned into another career.  Interesting guy and I'm hoping to talk with him more about that experience, but very different since I have a big stache and don't need another career.   I know a ex-mechanical engineer turned farmer who made the leap from maxing income in a soul-sucking cube job to being a low earning farmer, a job he loves.  Another interesting guy I hope to visit with about his experience, but he was changing from one career/identity to another.  I know a guy who owns and manages 50 rental properties.  He is so wrapped up in this identity, he can't pull himself away from that work even though he wants to do other things, and his health is suffering from running himself ragged.  I know no one who, in the prime of their career, walked away from work to stare into the void to find out just who they are and what they would do if all of the identity that used to come from a career is stripped away.  I look forward to this process, even if it is at times uncomfortable, but I wish I knew someone who has gone before me that I could chat with in person.

When people ask what I'm going to do next, or if I am looking for work, I just say I'm taking time off to reconsider what I want to do, and that it likely will not be more of the same career I'm leaving.  Most stare back at me uncomprehending.  "Time off?  What is that?"  At first it was entertaining, but it is also kind of isolating.  It is not a discomfort that makes me want to return to work just to avoid it, no way, but I did not expect to feel this way.

ks135ks

  • 5 O'Clock Shadow
  • *
  • Posts: 21
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1403 on: May 29, 2018, 09:19:31 PM »
A couple days ago, I realized that I hit the 9 month mark since being in my primary career.  I want to say since FIRE'd but that isn't quite true as
  • DH still is working to cover health insurance, pad his side of the stash (we have most things joint, but there's still a bit of individual tracking too) and consequently also covers the majority of our household expenses meaning we haven't had to withdraw anything from the stash and
  • I started a part time seasonal position during Jan - Apr that I'll likely continue to do each year that covers the rest of our expenses plus

Even still, in my head/heart, I consider myself FIRE'd and hubby semi-FIRE'd.  I'm still working through decompression and being nervous about can this really be true? will the savings really last a lifetime?  But it's been 9 months and aside from the rocky start in the market this year, our net worth is climbing and expenses are falling.  Hooray for more time to do things off hours!

As a concession to nerves though a couple weeks ago, I applied for a position with a local company in my main career.  Within the hour of applying, I had an email from the HR recruiter setting up a phone interview; an hour later, the phone interview and the following Monday, a scheduled in office interview.  Come interview Monday, sitting in the lobby waiting, my heart is beating anxiously (it's been a decade since I've sat on this side of an interview) and my mind is racing (eeeeekk... who am I going to talk to?, how do I explain 9 months [YIKES! 9 MONTHS!] not working in this field?, what if this is a deal breaker?, has it really been 9 months already?).  Then I see a contact I have in the company.  After the general pleasantries, he offhandedly remarked that "I just don't want to be here today."  In that instant, I realized two things: I don't really care if I get this job and I really don't want to be here either.  A few minutes later, he left for lunch and the HR lady met me to escort me back to the office in the cube farm where I'd be meeting with the manager of the department.  During the walk, she asked how the weather was outside since "we can't tell from back here, though it looks really nice from the lobby."  My brain: Oh my god, what am I doing here?  that wasn't nerves in the lobby, that was your body revolting at the idea of returning to a cube farm!  I bombed that interview.  The nice HR lady sent me the official we're going with other candidates email at the end of last week.  What a relief!  Without a shadow of a doubt, I do NOT want to go back to what I was doing.

Since that interview, I've had two instances of saying I'm not working:

First, my hubby and I went with my mom to our family cabin in the woods over Memorial Day weekend.  We saw a couple who are longtime friends of ours from there who asked where I was working.  I just said at home doing home things and my mom quickly interjected and said "oh, she's retired."  Friend's response was "you stinker, congratulations."  I just smiled, and conversation continued normally about other things.  My mom gets it!  This is kind of a big deal as my parents' opinions matter perhaps more than they should.  My dad is a tougher nut to crack, but he's coming around - he retired himself at 55, 15 years ago.

Second, I met my mom and dad this morning to volunteer for a work party on the local rails-to-trails space; something I wouldn't have been able to do if I was working.  I met one of the other volunteers for the first time.  She's a retired school teacher from my hometown (I wasn't one of her students) who asked where I was working.  I just answered that I am not right now.  Her response: "good for you!" and again conversation continued normally.

I know these both sound like others opinions matter too much, but while that may be true to an extent, for me it was a major breakthrough as I've been awkwardly handling the "what do you do" question trying to explain that I'm keeping my options open when really I just want to say, I work for me and hubby doing what I want and what we determine needs to get done. 

Decompression is still something that is an ongoing process for me.  When we executed our version of FIRE, DH and I moved from FL to PA to be closer to family.  Our PA home has many projects that need completing.  We're slowly working on those.  There are some days when I really don't want to work on anything but they are getting further and further apart so more things are getting accomplished each day.  I still don't know what kind of routine I'll end up falling into, but whatever it is, it will be fabulous.

I hope everyone from the 2017 cohort is having a marvelous FIRE-ment and those watching from subsequent years have great success getting there.  Thanks for reading my ramblings.

markbike528CBX

  • Pencil Stache
  • ****
  • Posts: 666
  • Location: the Everbrown part of the Evergreen State (WA)
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1404 on: May 29, 2018, 10:06:03 PM »
ks135ks.  Thanks for the update.   I might have ended up in your situation in about 9 months, if not for your story,

MonkeyJenga

  • Walrus Stache
  • *******
  • Posts: 7074
  • Location: Washington DC
  • Cake or Death?
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1405 on: May 30, 2018, 08:38:44 AM »
Congrats on avoiding the cubicles!

I am actually about to un-FIRE. Made it 7 months. But no cubes at this place! They've got bean bag chairs and an ice cream freezer, and I have official permission to come in late every day.

Still not thrilled about needing a morning alarm, but I care about the mission. Ugh.

Kay-Ell

  • 5 O'Clock Shadow
  • *
  • Posts: 73
  • Semi-retired in 2017
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1406 on: May 30, 2018, 01:02:05 PM »
Thanks for the update!  I just hit the 7 month mark, and it's rather reassuring to know others are grappling with some of the same experiences while making the transition.  I'm starting to become emensely more productive, with an abundance of enthusiasm when I tackle a project. Yesterday I bought and laid a literal ton of rocks, nearly completing an outdoor project.  Today I'm going to pick up another 1/2 ton!  I was worried for a while there, while deep in the throws of decompression, that I'd broken my ambitious, over achieving personality with retirement. 

FrugalAussie

  • 5 O'Clock Shadow
  • *
  • Posts: 85
  • Location: Mandurah, Western Australia
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1407 on: May 30, 2018, 06:02:57 PM »
Keep the updates coming, I like to know how other people are managing their FIRE transition. It's also a gift for people thinking about or getting close to their own retirement.  While everyone's situation is different there are certainly some common themes.

I've now been retired 12 months. My greatest achievement has been my health.  I lost a little weight (8kg) and become a regular at the gym.  The achievement I'm most pleased about is that I stopped drinking alcohol entirely. It's been 173 days! I'm very proud of myself as my partner still drinks and I've attended various social functions including a 'wine and cheese' night and was not tempted. I drank to cope with stress when working and it became a habit so I'm well pleased to have those days behind me. I'd estimate that I've saved about $750. My fitness is starting to plateau so I'm now going to train for a women's fun triathlon. It's a special event geared towards getting women to try the event, it's not at all competitive.

We've just moved into a new house that has taken about 2 years to get built so we've been focused on that challenge. Now we're moved in and our old house is on the market I'm starting to think about "the rest of my life". I'm really please with how the house has turned out and happy to spend a lot of time in it, getting settled in and getting the garden established but I'm restless for some external stimulation. I've increased my commitment to my volunteer work which has been satisfying. Soon I'll be picking up a little bit of paid work teaching in my professional area. My plan is to use that pay to fund some giving for ongoing projects/passions which my partner doesn't agree to financially support so I can't use "our" money. 

My partner has also retired, he loves it.  Basically he potters around at home all day with the occasional social activity that I organise. He's had a couple of health issues that we're getting on top off but otherwise he's very happy.

Financially, we're feeling a bit stretched as we've had so many one off expenses for the new house but did expect that so really is an emotional response rather than financial. Our discretionary spending has been at the expected level, no sudden splurging we didn't budget for. 
FIRE'd in 2017, aged 51. Not bored yet!

Daisy

  • Handlebar Stache
  • *****
  • Posts: 1880
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1408 on: May 30, 2018, 08:42:30 PM »
It's 8 months of being FIREd for me.

I've used the line "on a sabbatical, or possibly early retirement if I can pull it off", and it has worked well for me.

I have no desire to enter the cubicle farm scene ever again.

I went paddling with some friends and they asked what I was up to. I mentioned the desire to never work for a big corporation again and that my dream job was to be a kayaking guide. Then one of them told me a local kayaking place was looking to hire. I sent an email and actually saw the owner at an event. So far I have not heard back but it does sound interesting. They are looking for kayaking guides for trips, some multi-day trips. That would be really cool to do.

I also applied to help at the science museum's summer camps. They have volunteer and paid positions. I did the phone interview and am waiting to hear back.

Other than that, I started FIRE with one long trip, and then another couple of smaller trips. Then I had two big ski trips but I had to cancel one due to a family emergency. I was able to go to the other one, then a new family emergency arose. Since that time, I've barely been home since I have been helping out the family. It has kind of changed my FIRE focus for now, but it is much easier to deal with these emergencies without having the full time job in the way. One of my reasons for FIRE was to be able to help out my elderly parents, and that happened sooner than I thought. Oh well, I am trying to do my best to have fun and balance that with my responsibilities. Being able to spend quality time with my parents at this stage is pretty great.

Cookie78

  • Handlebar Stache
  • *****
  • Posts: 1786
  • Location: Canada
    • Cookie's Goals
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1409 on: May 30, 2018, 11:03:48 PM »
As a concession to nerves though a couple weeks ago, I applied for a position with a local company in my main career.  Within the hour of applying, I had an email from the HR recruiter setting up a phone interview; an hour later, the phone interview and the following Monday, a scheduled in office interview.  Come interview Monday, sitting in the lobby waiting, my heart is beating anxiously (it's been a decade since I've sat on this side of an interview) and my mind is racing (eeeeekk... who am I going to talk to?, how do I explain 9 months [YIKES! 9 MONTHS!] not working in this field?, what if this is a deal breaker?, has it really been 9 months already?).  Then I see a contact I have in the company.  After the general pleasantries, he offhandedly remarked that "I just don't want to be here today."  In that instant, I realized two things: I don't really care if I get this job and I really don't want to be here either.  A few minutes later, he left for lunch and the HR lady met me to escort me back to the office in the cube farm where I'd be meeting with the manager of the department.  During the walk, she asked how the weather was outside since "we can't tell from back here, though it looks really nice from the lobby."  My brain: Oh my god, what am I doing here?  that wasn't nerves in the lobby, that was your body revolting at the idea of returning to a cube farm!  I bombed that interview.  The nice HR lady sent me the official we're going with other candidates email at the end of last week.  What a relief!  Without a shadow of a doubt, I do NOT want to go back to what I was doing.

I love this!!



I'm coming up on 10 months FIRE (or FIRE imposter). It's been great so far with a 2 week canoe trip, 3 weeks in the South Pacific,  week in Maine, 2 weeks volunteering in Dominica, copious amounts of time spent with family, friends, and dogs, working on hobbies, building my boat, helping out family members, learning Spanish, leather working, fixing my houses and vehicle, and the next 2 week canoe trip is starting this weekend.

The only crappy parts involve dealing with my houses while I've been away. It's a crappy time to sell in my area so I haven't tried yet, but I really need to soon for the sake of my sanity. Tenants are interested in buying it, so hopefully that works out this summer. Technically I'm only on a leave of absence from work and I am due back Aug 13 (hence my FIRE imposter status). I definitely need to sell the rental house before I feel comfortable quitting permanently.

But lately I'm a little stressy financially. I had put aside 'enough' in a HISA for the year, but ended up spending more than I thought I would fixing up the houses. I'm getting on the low end of comfortable and I still have 3 months to go before I'll see another paycheck! I'd rather avoid needing to take anything out of investment accounts already. Also I don't think the stress is just financial. I have been listening to a bunch of podcasts and reading a bunch of books related to long term adventure travel (sailing, motorcycle around the world, month long treks, etc) and I'm sure it's causing stress due to my LACK OF FREEDOM compared to the people in these stories. Still more free than 95% of people, but my brain wants more! Can someone please tell me this is a normal part of decompression??

Anyway, back to work in August, hopefully sell the house shortly after, fire for good in the spring, sell the other house maybe that summer, then find another reason I'm not quite free (probably dogs).

MandyM

  • Pencil Stache
  • ****
  • Posts: 543
  • Location: Lexington, KY
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1410 on: May 31, 2018, 07:54:56 AM »
I'm 10 months in and definitely not looking for a return to office life. I did inquire with my previous boss about picking up contract work on a very specific project, but he more or less shot that down, at least for now. It would be ideal if I could shake that loose - its easy work that I liked doing while I was there and it would only be about 40 hours worth of work concentrated at the end of each quarter. Oh well, I don't absolutely need the money, but it would be nice to grab some off easy, fun work.

Since I've quit, I built a small retaining wall, paver patio, and integrated fire pit in my back yard. It turned out better than I expected:) Currently, I'm gearing up to gut my kitchen with a full re-do. I'm nervous and excited all at once. I've not attempted anything of this size or complexity before. I have some friends that are basically renovation experts and they will help immensely.

Like others, I've also become a regular at the gym. I'm not monitoring my weight, but I'm down one pant size so far. I love being able to take my time there, I rarely have somewhere I need to be right after.

When I first quit, I would temper how I presented that depending on my audience...sometimes I would use the word sabbatical, sometimes retirement, sometimes I would be more vague. Nowadays, I generally just say "I don't work" and leave it at that unless someone inquires further.

I would say my biggest surprise after I quit is how normal my life feels - from the very first Monday that I didn't head to work, nothing felt strange. There was never a nagging in the back of my mind about setting an alarm, missing a deadline, prepping for a meeting or all the million things that I used to have spinning in my head. I was so pleasantly surprised when those thoughts never came.

"Freedom lies in being bold." -Robert Frost

MrsWhipple

  • Bristles
  • ***
  • Posts: 385
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1411 on: May 31, 2018, 12:29:51 PM »
I've actually started missing what I used to do a while back (tutoring math), so much that I just applied at a tutoring place near me. The owner said he wasn't hiring at the time (makes sense, summer is always slow) but that he would probably have an opening for me in the fall. I might pick up a couple students on my own in the fall and see if I'd rather do it independently or for a company.

My husband is rocking the stay at home dad thing, and I kind of feel like I'm just not as good at parenting a toddler as he is. I love being with my baby, but she is VERY needy and I am such an introvert that it makes it difficult to stay "on" for hours and hours on end.

Also, gym 5 days a week. So much fun!

SachaFiscal

  • Stubble
  • **
  • Posts: 234
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1412 on: June 03, 2018, 09:23:08 AM »
My greatest achievement has been my health.  I lost a little weight (8kg) and become a regular at the gym.  The achievement I'm most pleased about is that I stopped drinking alcohol entirely. It's been 173 days! 

Congratulations on the health improvements.  I reduced my drinking significantly but am still drinking socially. How do you navigate social events without drinking? Any tips?

The past couple of days I had a small panic as I'm approaching 1 year not working and am scared about losing the opportunity to go back to the same career I had.  I started thinking..."maybe I should just try and get a job and work for a while so I can keep up my skills".  It doesn't help that the market has been pretty flat.  I crave that old feeling of dumping a bunch of money into my Vanguard account every couple of weeks.  I started looking at jobs online and it made me nausious just doing that.  I really don't want to do that type of work anymore even if it is so lucrative.  Also I thought about how much better my life is now...no stress, cooking and eating healthy, exercising more regularly, finally playing music again, improved relationships.  It all adds up to a way better quality of life and that is priceless.  I just have to have confidence that my investments will ultimately grow.

MonkeyJenga

  • Walrus Stache
  • *******
  • Posts: 7074
  • Location: Washington DC
  • Cake or Death?
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1413 on: June 03, 2018, 10:39:54 AM »
My greatest achievement has been my health.  I lost a little weight (8kg) and become a regular at the gym.  The achievement I'm most pleased about is that I stopped drinking alcohol entirely. It's been 173 days! 

Congratulations on the health improvements.  I reduced my drinking significantly but am still drinking socially. How do you navigate social events without drinking? Any tips?

I stopped drinking about four years ago. Social events are easy, assuming no issues with alcoholism - just don't drink. Get water or soda and talk to people. Are you worried about how you will be able to resist drinking, how you will explain it to other people, or something else?

I have found I have a better time when I don't drink. In the month before I quit my job and went traveling, I was at brunch with friends who kept pushing their unlimited mimosas at me. Decided to abandon my prohibition for my last month in the city. Party it up! That day ended with a lame date and an expensive cab, after all my friends went home early to pass out and/or vomit. The other few times I drank weren't worth it either.

SwordGuy

  • Magnum Stache
  • ******
  • Posts: 4008
  • Location: Fayetteville, NC
    • Flipping Fayetteville
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1414 on: June 03, 2018, 10:22:26 PM »
I reduced my drinking significantly but am still drinking socially. How do you navigate social events without drinking? Any tips?

How about just saying, "No, thank you."

I rarely have an alcoholic drink.  I don't apologize for it.  I don't explain it.   I drink what I damn well please, and thats all that matters to me.

It **really** can be that simple.

If you have "friends" who feel the need to cajole you into drinking lots of alcohol, just let them know you aren't interested in doing that anymore.

If that doesn't work, let them know more strongly.  And if that doesn't work, tell them to fuck off and mind their own damn business.  Or get better friends.  Real ones who care about you instead of how drunk you are.


DavidAnnArbor

  • Handlebar Stache
  • *****
  • Posts: 1618
  • Age: 52
  • Location: Ann Arbor, Michigan
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1415 on: June 04, 2018, 08:23:38 PM »
My greatest achievement has been my health.  I lost a little weight (8kg) and become a regular at the gym.  The achievement I'm most pleased about is that I stopped drinking alcohol entirely. It's been 173 days! 

Congratulations on the health improvements.  I reduced my drinking significantly but am still drinking socially. How do you navigate social events without drinking? Any tips?

The past couple of days I had a small panic as I'm approaching 1 year not working and am scared about losing the opportunity to go back to the same career I had.  I started thinking..."maybe I should just try and get a job and work for a while so I can keep up my skills".  It doesn't help that the market has been pretty flat.  I crave that old feeling of dumping a bunch of money into my Vanguard account every couple of weeks.  I started looking at jobs online and it made me nausious just doing that.  I really don't want to do that type of work anymore even if it is so lucrative.  Also I thought about how much better my life is now...no stress, cooking and eating healthy, exercising more regularly, finally playing music again, improved relationships.  It all adds up to a way better quality of life and that is priceless.  I just have to have confidence that my investments will ultimately grow.

Maybe just get a part time fun job so that you make a little money, but not work too much, and that way you won't need your investments as much. It might give you some peace of mind

SachaFiscal

  • Stubble
  • **
  • Posts: 234
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1416 on: June 05, 2018, 09:28:48 AM »
@SwordGuy and @MonkeyJenga I think I have a bit of social anxiety and I use drinking to alleviate that when I go out. It's not so much that friends are trying to get me to drink.  But I usually get a stomach ache later and feel a little down the next day. I end up eating more junk food when I drink. Plus it affects my ability to keep a consistent workout schedule.  I notice I feel better after not drinking for a few weeks, but then I forget and do it again.

@DavidAnnArbor I might try and look for something fun and flexible I could do (like Amazon delivery or walking dogs) to earn a little bit of money just to put into my Vanguard funds.

SwordGuy

  • Magnum Stache
  • ******
  • Posts: 4008
  • Location: Fayetteville, NC
    • Flipping Fayetteville
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1417 on: June 05, 2018, 10:02:19 AM »
@SachaFiscal ,  I totally get the social anxiety issue.   My wife tried quitting smoking countless times.  The biggest obstacle was she got anxious in public situations and the cigarettes gave her something to do with her hands.  Plus the act of taking a puff gave her more time to think about how to respond to what someone said.   

I don't have any "by gosh, this will sure work for you!" advice.   But if that's the root of the problem, then look for something more innocuous that will serve the same purpose.  Maybe a fidget spinner?   

Or just learn to embrace whatever non-alcoholic drink you choose as a substitute.  Tell everyone "I'm hitting the HARD stuff!" And then chug that Dr. Pepper or non-alcoholic beer.   No one who cares for you (or at least isn't a dick) will mind one whit.

Freedom17

  • 5 O'Clock Shadow
  • *
  • Posts: 74
  • Location: Travelling
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1418 on: June 05, 2018, 10:22:44 AM »
@SwordGuy and @MonkeyJenga I think I have a bit of social anxiety and I use drinking to alleviate that when I go out. It's not so much that friends are trying to get me to drink.  But I usually get a stomach ache later and feel a little down the next day. I end up eating more junk food when I drink. Plus it affects my ability to keep a consistent workout schedule.  I notice I feel better after not drinking for a few weeks, but then I forget and do it again.

@DavidAnnArbor I might try and look for something fun and flexible I could do (like Amazon delivery or walking dogs) to earn a little bit of money just to put into my Vanguard funds.

I also get an upset stomach with certain drinks, especially beer and wine. However other things like scotch are quite fine, perhaps you could try other types of alcohol, or as others say just get rid of it completely.

DavidAnnArbor

  • Handlebar Stache
  • *****
  • Posts: 1618
  • Age: 52
  • Location: Ann Arbor, Michigan
Re: Target FIRE: 2017
« Reply #1419 on: June 05, 2018, 03:19:13 PM »
I also have social anxiety