Author Topic: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2  (Read 127787 times)

Linda_Norway

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #850 on: June 19, 2018, 12:29:51 AM »
What to do when your mother wants to give you a book as a birthday present. I could pick one myself up to 50 euro.
I bought a book I wanted to have, a subject matter book that I can use for lookup things. But it was a lot cheaper. I couldn't find a relevant other book. Then I fell for the temptation of buying 3 pockets for little money. All 4 books together 50 euros. I will read the pockets, let DH read them and bring them to the give-away-bookshelf in the grocery store. They do need need to be moved to our next house.

oneday

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #851 on: June 19, 2018, 11:01:46 AM »
My battle at the moment is not letting Ofpym derail my progress- he keeps saying "oh I'll read that" when I create a book pile. MY DUDE YOU WON'T BECAUSE YOU HAVEN'T IN THE LAST SIX YEARS.

My hubby does the exact same thing. He has read about 4 books in the last five years and all except one of those were biography type books related to his hobby in the last few yrs. He doesn't even read articles he's saved. Maybe in retirement... :/

I am legit sneaking my books out of the house to stop this happening. I don't touch his books, many of which we have moved multiple houses without opening [but WHATIF HE NEEDS TO BUILD HIS OWN ELECTRIC BASS and we got rid of the book?!? CHECKMATE!] but just stopping him vetoing my right to get rid of my own books.

@mspym @Fresh Bread I feel you!  Mr. X tried to do something like this with an exercise ball *I* bought, then abandoned.  He never used it either.  My mistake was asking him if he would ever use it.   I snuck it out when he was on vacation & he never noticed!

Spent the day reorganizing my kitchen and pantry and now we have a lot more empty space (top corner cabinets at a weird angle anyone?) that I'm not sure what to do with.

Leave it empty :)  Sounds like it might be hard to get to, anyway.

Nederstash

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #852 on: June 19, 2018, 11:42:26 AM »
What to do when your mother wants to give you a book as a birthday present. I could pick one myself up to 50 euro.
I bought a book I wanted to have, a subject matter book that I can use for lookup things. But it was a lot cheaper. I couldn't find a relevant other book. Then I fell for the temptation of buying 3 pockets for little money. All 4 books together 50 euros. I will read the pockets, let DH read them and bring them to the give-away-bookshelf in the grocery store. They do need need to be moved to our next house.

You're Dutch (speaking), right? This book is pretty special, you give it to your Mom to fill out and then she gives it back to you. There are similar books for fathers/grandparents. It'll be a book you'll keep forever!
https://www.bol.com/nl/p/vertel-eens-mam-vertel-eens/9200000040710112/

Bird In Hand

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #853 on: June 19, 2018, 11:50:54 AM »
I'm sure this idea has come up earlier in the thread or in the predecessor.  But we're going to give the kids each a cardboard box and pay them $5 (or $10, I don't know yet) to fill it up with old toys to donate.  I wish someone would make me the same offer to get rid of some of my unused items!  :D

Linda_Norway

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #854 on: June 19, 2018, 12:35:25 PM »
What to do when your mother wants to give you a book as a birthday present. I could pick one myself up to 50 euro.
I bought a book I wanted to have, a subject matter book that I can use for lookup things. But it was a lot cheaper. I couldn't find a relevant other book. Then I fell for the temptation of buying 3 pockets for little money. All 4 books together 50 euros. I will read the pockets, let DH read them and bring them to the give-away-bookshelf in the grocery store. They do need need to be moved to our next house.

You're Dutch (speaking), right? This book is pretty special, you give it to your Mom to fill out and then she gives it back to you. There are similar books for fathers/grandparents. It'll be a book you'll keep forever!
https://www.bol.com/nl/p/vertel-eens-mam-vertel-eens/9200000040710112/

Yes, I am Dutch. Interesting concept. My mother also has her birthday soon. I'll consider this book.

oneday

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #855 on: June 19, 2018, 11:25:46 PM »
I'll press Mr. X for a decision on the 4th thing tomorrow when he comes over for other business.

Mr. X is a slippery one and did not give me an answer.  So I'm not free to try to re-home the item!  I'm giving him an ultimatum on Friday, as I won't have time to follow through before that anyway.

================================================

Decided on a 5th item that needs to go, but can't go right away.  First I'll offer it back to the family member who gave it to me, but if they won't take it, it is trash.  Maybe I should just toss it?  It's a bookcase made from pine planks, quite ugly but functional, however subsequent modifications to add shelves are unsafe & should be removed.  No, the relative who gave it to me will notice if it's not in my house.  Although I did clarify it wasn't a loan, it was a gift...but I only got it a month ago...

Someone please tell me what to do!

joonifloofeefloo

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #856 on: June 19, 2018, 11:53:10 PM »
Yes, tell the relative you've appreciated it but can't use it in your new home, do they want it back? Because otherwise you'll be donating it. Definitely donate vs trash :)

Mezzie

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #857 on: June 20, 2018, 01:07:33 PM »
I've been pretty good about dealing with incoming paper clutter. It's not perfect yet, but I'm getting better!

oneday

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #858 on: June 20, 2018, 07:30:19 PM »
Yes, tell the relative you've appreciated it but can't use it in your new home, do they want it back? Because otherwise you'll be donating it. Definitely donate vs trash :)

You're right.  I have to.  I don't want to insult them, but it would be worse if I just donated it & they noticed.  Text sent!

ETA: Yes, I'll donate it, but first I'll take off the sharp/dangerous bits.
« Last Edit: June 20, 2018, 07:38:46 PM by oneday »

WootWoot

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #859 on: June 22, 2018, 08:15:30 AM »
I've got some bags of clothing and art supplies to go to the Salvation Army. I decided it was time to get rid of clothing I didn't really love. I'm not gonna go so far as saying "they didn't spark joy" but I did have a few items that I never liked much, so why keep them?

oneday

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #860 on: June 22, 2018, 06:46:21 PM »
The relative wanted the bookcase back.  I'm glad I didn't act to hastily!

=================================================

I recycled two boxes today!  It's sort of cheating.  I only put away a few things, then rearranged the contents of the remaining boxes.  Still, I am reclaiming the air space from inside several partially empty boxes!  And the living room is almost clear of boxes. Only the paper boxes and the donate box (which I don't count because it's on the way out soon-ish).

I'm pulling out all papers I find for the next phase of KonMari.  This weekend!  I'm anxious about this.

I'm also piling up all photographs.  That pile is getting impressively large (3 1/2 boxes at this time).  These are all family of origin photos + married to Mr. X photos (1975-1997).  Few are in albums.  I was pleased to note when I packed the photos originally how much of them are organized chronologically.  That has always been the biggest mental hurdle for me.

joonifloofeefloo

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #861 on: June 22, 2018, 07:04:26 PM »
Oooooooh, I will be so inspired by ANY movement you manage to make with papers. It's totally my sticky point (though I'm down to two banker boxes of it). Please post as much detail as you're willing!

When I was doing Morning Pages this week (which I shred the same day I write them!), they assured me I could now go through a layer of old work stuff. Whew. My life feels so new and different now, and it seems like this can maybe happen now!

Other stuff my Morning Pages said can go now:
*electric toothbrush -man, those work well! but I've come to hate the noise so I don't use it
*books and manuals from early learning in two subjects this past year -I've genuinely graduated from them
*many pages from two binders
*my giant vision board (still current, but will just take a pic)
*all the other oversized papery things in the Oversized Paper Folder
*lots of electronic files
*shame about being hyperkeen on accuracy
*several tags, boxes, etc, from stuff purchased since moving here that I'm for sure keeping because the things are awesome!

Serendip

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #862 on: June 22, 2018, 07:27:43 PM »
Love Morning pages @jooniFLORisploo ! I haven't done them for years but I love the idea of immediate shredding, could greatly reduce self-censoring.

Was visiting family this week, which brings up mixed feelings. My mother has major hoarding problems and it has affected our family my entire life.
I occasionally become very triggered when visiting, even though I've learned some skills to deal with the emotions (the food hoarding is hard for me still : multiple fridges packed full, food all gone bad, many freezers--same situation and a pantry that is never touched and jammed).

However, one thing I am reassured of is

*Life is not about the things. Use the things to live your life or pass them along and be free to explore experiences *

So..on that note, decluttered some books that aren't speaking to me anymore, clothing that isn't comfortable and extra sheets/bedding because really, when do I need 10 sheet sets? Love coming home to my own space which is feeling like more and more of a sacred and personal space.

« Last Edit: June 23, 2018, 09:30:58 AM by Serendip »

firelight

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #863 on: June 22, 2018, 08:21:32 PM »
Managed to declutter kids clothes and kitchen/pantry. Plan for weekend: go through my clothes again and get them into one dresser so it's easy to get/find what I need. Also need to get the toy room in shape.

joonifloofeefloo

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #864 on: June 22, 2018, 10:13:23 PM »
Love Morning pages @jooniFLORisploo ! I haven't done them for years but I love the idea of immediate shredding, could greatly reduce self-censoring.

I only just restarted them this week, and every morning I'm pissed off at them ;)   This is because I usually only sleep 4-5 hours at night now (plus another random amount in the afternoon), so when I wake unnaturally and unnecessarily early, it's dark, I'm truly bleary-eyed, my brain is foggy. So, the MPs happen with the intended lack of self-censoring -I can't see or think what I'm writing! And it's working.

And then I shred them because JC recommends we not look at them again. If I'm not going to look at them again, out!

Love coming home to my own space which is feeling like more and more of a sacred and personal space.

Beautiful :)

joonifloofeefloo

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #865 on: June 22, 2018, 10:17:01 PM »
Went through my little storage spaces and made a fast pile of stuff identified in Morning Pages, plus the boxes I keep on hand for the next time we need to move. (We're hoping we don't need to move for some years, and if we do, I can get more -even my "perfect" ones for a couple of bucks.)

Our living room is very empty, the way I love, and now I just lie down on the carpet, gaze out at the trees, and fall into a lovely snooze whenever I'm compelled to :)

Fresh Bread

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #866 on: June 25, 2018, 12:41:00 AM »
Soooo, I had to clear a lot of surfaces because we are doing renovations, and it went well. Now I'm looking at the empty surfaces and it doesn't feel..."right". I definitely don't like clutter, but now is it turning out that I don't like minimalism either??

Linda_Norway

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #867 on: June 25, 2018, 01:09:10 AM »
Soooo, I had to clear a lot of surfaces because we are doing renovations, and it went well. Now I'm looking at the empty surfaces and it doesn't feel..."right". I definitely don't like clutter, but now is it turning out that I don't like minimalism either??

I my work they made a new brake room which has a few minimalistic looking comfy chairs, a TV on the wall and nothing else. I commented to a colleague that I missed something, maybe a plant or something on the wall. But the colleague answered that she liked it this way.
Obviously people are a bit different. Some really like a minimalistic look and others want something a little less sterile.

Why don't you in your case leave the surfaces empty for a while and see what you think about it over time. And then you can experiment with adding a carefully chosen item to put on it, rather than lots of things.
« Last Edit: June 25, 2018, 11:26:44 AM by Linda_Norway »

joonifloofeefloo

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #868 on: June 25, 2018, 07:49:16 AM »
...but now is it turning out that I don't like minimalism either??

Yep, maybe! Definitely some people don't. When people come to my place, most express a sense of relief, space, zen, etc. But a minority feel uneasy as a result of the minimalism. They really, really, really need there to be a bit more stuff. You'll find your balance :)

Ladychips

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #869 on: June 25, 2018, 10:08:20 AM »
When I was in college, my best friend lived down the street in new-build, bigger-than-an-efficiency-but-not-quite-a-one-bedroom apartment. I could NOT sit in her apartment because of how much 'stuff' she had, big furniture, knick knacks, etc.  I literally could not catch my breath in her place because the stuff was overwhelming.  I would sit on her front stoop and wait for her to get ready just so I could breathe.

I lived down the street in an old house that had been cut up into a duplex.  I had 12 foot ceilings, hardwood floors, big windows...it was divine.  Lots of space and room to breathe.  One day she was in my house and she said "I feel so sorry for you because you don't have any stuff."  And THAT'S when I realized different people love different things.  It was a real eye opener for me.

joonifloofeefloo

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #870 on: June 25, 2018, 01:58:32 PM »
I dig a biggie today: a relatively recent paper journal. Oy.

I kept six pages from it, because they had my son's birthday, other notes of mama love for son, a couple of big things I still need to process a bit (a person being vicious; the beginning of the housing journey that brought us to our current location).

It's really, really challenging for me to let go of handwritten pieces. Oh, the emotions of that! So attached to those, but there are too many pages!

Criteria I used: If I can't read it (and that's the majority of my writing), it goes. hahahahaha

oneday

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #871 on: June 25, 2018, 05:23:17 PM »
Since my post on Friday, I did not deal with any papers.   It was very intimidating and so I found lots of other things to do.  Sis & I were talking about FlyLady v. Marie Kondo last night.  I think I am going to combine the two approaches.   From KonMari: I will deal with all papers "in one go" and also I will try to follow her directives for keep/toss.  From FlyLady: I will set a timer ("you can do anything for 15 minutes") and work each night to get through this.   I will probably also reward myself with chocolate ;)

I am committing to two small parts of this task tonight.  1-dig through all remaining boxes to be sure I've got all papers in one pile; 2-separate filing supplies from informational papers.  That may not take 15 minutes, but that's all I'll do tonight because I also have another commitment in the evening.

@jooniFLORisploo I'm just going to brute-force myself to deal with it (method outlined above)...hold myself accountable for doing *something* each day...and be satisfied with whatever results I can achieve by next Sunday (tentatively).  PS - how long does it take you to do your morning pages, and do you stick to 3 pages no matter what? PPS - great job getting rid of all that stuff!  I especially have a hard time letting go of packaging because very often I am disappointed by the things I buy.


So...on that note, decluttered some...Love coming home to my own space which is feeling like more and more of
a sacred and personal space[/b].

@Serendip, sorry about the family issues. But I love what you wrote bolded above!  I am going to sit with "sacred" and see if that is what I am going for (I've been thinking serene).

Soooo, I had to clear a lot of surfaces because we are doing renovations, and it went well. Now I'm looking at the empty surfaces and it doesn't feel..."right". I definitely don't like clutter, but now is it turning out that I don't like minimalism either??

Why don't you in your case leave the surfaces empty for a while and see what you think about it over time. And then you can experiment with adding a carefully chosen item to put on it, rather than lots of things.

@Fresh Bread @Linda_Norway Another vote for Linda's wisdom! Especially the bolded part.

oneday

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #872 on: June 25, 2018, 05:25:01 PM »
I dig a biggie today: a relatively recent paper journal. Oy.

I kept six pages from it, because they had my son's birthday, other notes of mama love for son, a couple of big things I still need to process a bit (a person being vicious; the beginning of the housing journey that brought us to our current location).

It's really, really challenging for me to let go of handwritten pieces. Oh, the emotions of that! So attached to those, but there are too many pages!

I feel you!

Quote
Criteria I used: If I can't read it (and that's the majority of my writing), it goes. hahahahaha

Lol, almost makes me wish my handwriting were less neat :)

joonifloofeefloo

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #873 on: June 25, 2018, 06:33:02 PM »
@jooniFLORisploo I'm just going to brute-force myself to deal with it (method outlined above)...hold myself accountable for doing *something* each day...and be satisfied with whatever results I can achieve by next Sunday (tentatively).  PS - how long does it take you to do your morning pages, and do you stick to 3 pages no matter what? PPS - great job getting rid of all that stuff!  I especially have a hard time letting go of packaging because very often I am disappointed by the things I buy.

Because the paper is so emotional for me, I can only manage a relatively short amount per day -15 minutes or an hour depending on the content; or one journal. I am so conflicted when it comes to paper. I adore it and I feel like it keeps me "safe" and known. But I get giddy at the thought of being free of it! The process makes me feel fragile, vulnerable, a little stressed, teary. So I'm careful with how much I ask of myself.

My MPs take me probably 7 minutes per day -totally guessing, as I don't have a clock happening at that point in the day. I write very fast, sloppily, illegibly. I get it out, move on with my day, and somewhere in there shred it.

Packacking I usually keep for at least a few months, until I know I'm keeping it. (If a warranty issue arose, I can buy a great box from UPS.) But so many places will accept a return even without the packaging, anyway, so that's freed me quite a bit.

oneday

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #874 on: June 25, 2018, 11:51:05 PM »
*shame about being hyperkeen on accuracy

Meant to address this earlier, but didn't have adequate time.

I am also hyperkeen on accuracy, and proud of it.  However, what is shameful/jerky is the way I would treat other people who don't share that trait; like they are deficient human beings.  So I started out being smug & superior but eventually realized I was just a jerk.  I have been reforming for some time and sometimes I lapse but it's farther & farther between incidents.

That's to say, I hope you can shed the shame.  Personally, I see nothing wrong with accuracy (natch), and I can't imagine you lording it over others, so the only thing left (in my reconing) is releasing the shame, just like your morning pages said.

ETA: jooni, thank you for your responses to my questions.  I've added The Artists Way to my ever-growing list of books to read.  Maybe oneday I'll get it from the library and learn the whole scoop on morning pages.

Reporting that I scoured my home for papers and found some in odd places: kitchen & bedroom closet.  Along the way, consolidated the smallest moving box into another partially empty box.  This empty box will get jammed between the wall & the washer to block the cat from going back there.  He is weirdly transfixed with that space, but the few times he got in there, he almost got stuck.  Yet he keeps wanting to go back.

I glanced at the paper pile & I think the filing supplies are separate for the most part.  I spent so much time finding papers that I didn't spend much time on this part.  It will be worked out eventually.
« Last Edit: June 26, 2018, 12:13:54 AM by oneday »

joonifloofeefloo

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #875 on: June 26, 2018, 12:35:03 AM »
Thanks, oneday :)
Very happy to meet someone else keen on accuracy (I suspect many forumites are). I think releasing the shame will take some time, as it involves decades of memories of people's snide remarks, blasts, and other inappropriateness. Blech.

The Julia Cameron book I'm working through is not The Artist's Way (though that would also tell you all about the MPs), but her version for people hitting retirement, which I think is an amazing resource for FIRE people. It speaks to issues around: leaving one's long-time network, solitude (perhaps initially unwanted), lack of structure, lack of imposed schedule. She acknowledges how difficult these can be for retirees -including those retiring from intensive parenting. It's called It's Never Too Late to Begin Again.

Great job getting your papers collected, per KM!

joonifloofeefloo

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #876 on: June 26, 2018, 05:10:56 PM »
Had some excellent movement today! Faced the 17" wide closet that was holding the boxes that were holding the envelopes that were holding the papers that I'd had scanned :)

1. Ripped open boxes
2. Emptied each envelope.
3. Stuff I instantaneously love went on one side of the shelf; stuff I instantaneously do not love (but legally may be required to keep) went on the other. Everything fit on one small shelf.

A final box held mostly bubble wrap from the last two moves, with some beloved items.

1. Ditched the wrap and box.
2. Place beloved items on shelf.

The closest looks and feels so much clearer now.

On another day, I can see if a section of that unloved paper is old enough tax stuff that it can now go.

I really hate that the scanners staples and folded some of my most precious papers (handwritten letters, two arts I did 43 years ago). Even if you opt for the "stuff back" option (which to me means I just want an electronic back up, not everything destroyed), they handle it as though one wants it wrecked. Darn!!

Alf91

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #877 on: June 26, 2018, 05:38:02 PM »
Would anyone have suggestions as to what to do with my (deceased) mother's wedding dress????

joonifloofeefloo

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #878 on: June 26, 2018, 05:45:27 PM »
Donate it to a thrift shop :)
Someone will use it as is, modify it into another lovely garment, or use the materials in a whole new way.

Serendip

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #879 on: June 26, 2018, 09:43:02 PM »
Someone gifted me something, while saying "if it doesn't work for you just pass it on"..so I put it straight into my give-away box when I got home ;)


Linda_Norway

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #880 on: June 27, 2018, 02:54:45 AM »
Would anyone have suggestions as to what to do with my (deceased) mother's wedding dress????

If it fits you, you could paint it and use as an evening dress, if you have any use that that. Or remake it into something.

Bird In Hand

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #881 on: June 27, 2018, 06:52:35 AM »
@jooniFLORisploo I'm just going to brute-force myself to deal with it (method outlined above)...hold myself accountable for doing *something* each day...and be satisfied with whatever results I can achieve by next Sunday (tentatively).  PS - how long does it take you to do your morning pages, and do you stick to 3 pages no matter what? PPS - great job getting rid of all that stuff!  I especially have a hard time letting go of packaging because very often I am disappointed by the things I buy.

Because the paper is so emotional for me, I can only manage a relatively short amount per day -15 minutes or an hour depending on the content; or one journal. I am so conflicted when it comes to paper. I adore it and I feel like it keeps me "safe" and known. But I get giddy at the thought of being free of it! The process makes me feel fragile, vulnerable, a little stressed, teary. So I'm careful with how much I ask of myself.

Oh my gosh, I know this is insensitive -- but you two sound a little nuts with the holding onto packaging, and also the emotional attachment to certain papers.

Did I mention that I apparently have found my people?  :D  I have the same exact issues!  I hang onto packaging waaaay too long, on the off chance that I might one day return something.  In my case it's really dumb because I'll hang onto boxes/receipts well beyond the end of the return window.  Eventually some of that stuff gets lost in the shuffle, and I'll uncover it a year later during a rage cleaning.

As far as paper, I'm hopeless.  I simply cannot bring myself to throw away certain papers, especially anything that triggers memories of meaningful times in my life.  I'm pretty sure I have every single letter or card that my wife (and before that when she was my gf) gave me.  I have the newspaper I bought on the day I left home to drive across the country to start college.  I have most of my notebooks from college stashed somewhere in the basement.  Anything that my kids bring home from school that looks halfway interesting and has their names on it, I put in a box.  Ok, it's now grown to about 3 boxes and counting.

joonifloofeefloo

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #882 on: June 27, 2018, 08:30:36 AM »
lol, I was going to be so bold as to agree that was insensitive...and then I read on :)

Literally everything the two of us own fits in my compact car in one go, so no one would say I have too much stuff, and one 8.5x17 shelf of paper is relatively little. I guess the ďcrazierĒ part is the ongoing, compelling desire to get rid of it all. A bunch of us in IRL community had talked once about how the compulsion to release stuff can be as, well, compulsive as the one to hoard. I canít imagine feeling so unaffected by Stuff as to just walk by it every day and ignore it, lol. (Currently, my borrowed bed is driving me bonkers, with it being so present, taking up so much space, being so hefty.)

When I see my late dadís nice little printing, I feel so connected and happy and loved :)    Ditto my sweet sonís grade 1 art. Iíve never kept all of it -just small samples.

The bulk of my paper is legal stuff (seven tax years, work stuff), or clear reminders to not get back with exes, lol (because Iíve tended to forget).

I might be okay with the stack now, now that itís scanned for backup, in its lovely viewable storage system, and I can just go through it all once a year and shred anything thatís ready to go. Maybe Iíve hit the optimal balance now (down from a deep, four-drawer filing cabinet) and need to train myself to bypass the compulsion now.

Bird In Hand

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #883 on: June 27, 2018, 01:38:52 PM »
A bunch of us in IRL community had talked once about how the compulsion to release stuff can be as, well, compulsive as the one to hoard.  I canít imagine feeling so unaffected by Stuff as to just walk by it every day and ignore it, lol. (Currently, my borrowed bed is driving me bonkers, with it being so present, taking up so much space, being so hefty.)

This is all rings true for me, but in my case it's a weird bi-polar kind of tension.  Decades of evidence are enough to label me a 'hoarder of certain things' (especially mementos, and anything that seems likely to be useful in the future).  Much of the time the clutter is invisible to me.  But I do cyclically bounce to the opposite pole where I'm extremely irritated by those hoarding tendencies, and suddenly I see it all around me and Must.  Destroy.  The Clutter.

The problem is that during these rage cleanings, I hit the low-hanging fruit first, saving the mementos/etc. for last.  And by the time I get to the mementos, my resolve has waned to the point where the memento-hoarding part of me wins out.  Maybe next time I'll ignore the clutter around my office desk and instead head straight to the memento stash and attack it.  :D


Quote
When I see my late dadís nice little printing, I feel so connected and happy and loved :)    Ditto my sweet sonís grade 1 art. Iíve never kept all of it -just small samples.

...and this is the main reason that I struggle with mementos.  When I do revisit old papers and other mementos every few years, the memories come flooding back and the thought of losing -- either the mementos or memories -- becomes an anathema to me.  I think in my case a good baby step would be to "thin out the collection" a bit.  Maybe go through all the old saved kids schoolwork and allow myself to let go of the stuff that doesn't immediately strike a chord, or are +/- duplicates of something else.

Quote
The bulk of my paper is legal stuff (seven tax years, work stuff), or clear reminders to not get back with exes, lol (because Iíve tended to forget).

Ah, I had forgotten about legal stuff.  I have a bunch of that too, though I keep it out of perceived necessity rather than sentimentality.  I should be smart enough to realize that I've never actually needed any of it, and am exceedingly unlikely to ever need any of it in the future.

Quote
I might be okay with the stack now, now that itís scanned for backup, in its lovely viewable storage system, and I can just go through it all once a year and shred anything thatís ready to go. Maybe Iíve hit the optimal balance now (down from a deep, four-drawer filing cabinet) and need to train myself to bypass the compulsion now.

Ugh, you just mentioned a deep, four-drawer filing cabinet.  Every so often I think to myself, "If I only had a deep, four-drawer filing cabinet, I could stash all this stuff away in a tidy manner!".  But I know that is faulty thinking when the real problem is that I simply have too much paper!

joonifloofeefloo

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #884 on: June 27, 2018, 01:52:02 PM »
Ugh, you just mentioned a deep, four-drawer filing cabinet.  Every so often I think to myself, "If I only had a deep, four-drawer filing cabinet...

:))))    That was my Paper Peak, reflecting an intensive, paper-centered work-from-home period. Man, deleting that stuff when it did become no longer needed, YUM.

joonifloofeefloo

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #885 on: June 27, 2018, 08:10:42 PM »
Progress:

*Got all the plastic tape off three shipping boxes, recycled as able, garbaged as required
*Got all the other packaging from this week's processing complete and out

Mezzie

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #886 on: June 27, 2018, 08:23:56 PM »
I put the free pen and spiral notebook from a training in my teaching-stuff box to give away next school year and declined other freebies.

oneday

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #887 on: June 28, 2018, 12:51:06 AM »
@Bird In Hand the struggle is real!  I relate to what you are saying.  I don't have kid stuff, but hold many sentimental items from Dad who passed on about 10 years ago.  I know I won't forget my Dad if I toss these things, but that isn't why I'm holding on to them, so it doesn't help release them.

@jooniFLORisploo good going getting that packaging perfectly prepared for it's next life phase. (sorry, ran out of alliteration juice)

@Mezzie way to go declining!  That is so helpful to me when I remember to do it.  I've gotten some funny looks and some folks have wondered, "Are you sure?"  Did you get any push back?

=====================================================


tl;dr - Did the thing. Not as bad as I thought. Recycled some papers & packaging; even more is going to shredder tomorrow.



My goal is to be paperless/digital outside of sentimental papers and currently-being-used papers, like the notes I write to myself or bills to be paid.  No papers should hang around more than 2 weeks.  If they do, they need to be scanned or stored with the other sentimental papers.

Yesterday I was stressed out by something that happened Monday evening, so it was not a good time to work on the paper pile.  Today I was feeling better & even a little guilty for skipping a day.  Plus, I brought work from the day job home.  It's my MO* to always leave one thing un-done and that thing is the ickiest task.  Today the work spillover was ickiest, and sorting papers seemed almost not icky in comparison!

So I set the timer for 15 minutes & got to work.  Quickly sorted out the filing supplies from the other paper, showing I have about 3 boxes of paper.  This is down from 7 boxes several years ago, so I feel good about that. Good to keep in mind how far I've come.  The work I've already done tell me the bulk of what remains is just trash waiting to be tossed.  Why do I feel compelled to look through it all?

Decided to attack "the box" first.  This box holds the oldest papers and also the ones that are hardest for me to deal with, hence why they are still there.  Happily, I immediately found several files that I can pass on to Mr. X, so that was some good momentum.  Then there were several that I could easily deal with.  Turns out the box is a mixed bag (har har).  Some of the papers are hard, but I found old contracts with gyms I no longer belong to, bills for the land line (including long distance charges!), vet bills on cats who are long deceased, etc. I saw dates in the 2007-2012 range.  Got a good chunk into the recycle bin and am taking a 2"/5cm stack to work tomorrow to shred.  Wee!

Also, found the packaging to my tablet.  Broke it down and it too got recycled.  Recent discussion here helped with that (thanks, you know who you are); I had that, plus KonMari's wisdom in mind as I was figuring out what to do with the packaging.  All this took maybe 20 minutes, so setting the timer for 15 was a good strategy (as was bringing home work). 

Hopefully today's good experience will carry over to momentum/motivation for tomorrow.

*Not a conscious choice, but that's how it usually ends up being.  Sometimes I can use this to get the 2nd most icky thing done, but not always.

formerlydivorcedmom

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #888 on: June 28, 2018, 07:38:56 AM »
I helped a friend and her three kids move yesterday.  It was a lot of work.  In the grand scheme of things, she really doesn't have a lot of stuff...and it made me slightly horrified by how much we still have, even after my big decluttering purge over the last 9 months.  I think I would have about 3 or 4 times as many boxes as she did, but most of it probably belongs to my husband and children.

My husband started work to organize our walk-in attic last night.  He shooed me out after a little while because I was asking him if we had to keep every single thing.  His giveaway and throwaway piles were quite small - but at least they exist!

I think I'm going to be inspired by y'all and go through my file cabinet again.  I'm hoping to get rid of enough that I can get rid of the two-drawer file cabinet and replace it with a small expandable folder for papers I need now and a slightly larger box for longer-term storage (kids' school papers, past year taxes)

joonifloofeefloo

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #889 on: June 28, 2018, 08:02:33 AM »
Shredded the last two journals yesterday! Everything that can go at this point is gone!

oneday

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #890 on: June 28, 2018, 10:57:35 AM »
formerlydivorcedmom, you are in good company: realizing you have more than you want to, cleaning up your own stuff, inspiring others to follow suit.  I think you will find a lot to toss in that file cabinet.

jooniFLORisploo way to go!  You are living the dream: perfect paperwork pile.

Swish

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #891 on: June 28, 2018, 03:06:29 PM »
YAY!

I have lurked for a long time and this thread motivated our spring clean up efforts. Initially we were going to haul most of the following list to the dump/metal recycle and instead we sold a bunch on Facebook Marketplace! We also donated six boxes of clothes/toys to community living!

Here is the list so far from cleaning out garage:
Smart Car Rims $125
Tar: $40
Paintings: $30
Vase: $15
Little People: $75 SOLD
Dryer: $85 SOLD
Jacuzzi Tub: $300 SOLD
Table & Chair: $15 SOLD
Potterybarn rug: $40 SOLD
LED Spares: $55 SOLD
Toys: $22 SOLD
Mirrors: $25 SOLD
Baby Gate: $25 SOLD
Fridge: $300 SOLD
Used Water Heater: $150 SOLD
Another Dryer: $100 SOLD

TOTAL SALES: $1,192.00

Time spent listing/cleaning: 8.75 hours
Dump fees: $0.00

Thank you for the motivation and I hope this motivates some one else the same way you all have motivated me!

I was having trouble selling the smart car rims and had them the last couple months. Two weeks ago my friend was driving and I saw a random guy park his smart car. I asked my friend to pull over cause that guy could need my rims. My buddy called me an idiot and that there was no way this would work. I convinced him to stop and I ran down the busy street to catch the guy. I asked him if he was interested in buying a set of smart car rims for his car. After his *who is this weirdo chasing me* response, he was pretty excited as he had just gotten a quote that day for almost $800 from the dealer! He met us at the house and I am $100 richer from a free set of rims :)

To quote my friend when I climbed back in the truck:

"Shut up that didn't work. Your such an idiot. Only you could pull some asinine stunt like that off."


« Last Edit: June 28, 2018, 03:17:34 PM by Swish »

oneday

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #892 on: June 28, 2018, 10:55:00 PM »
@Swish that's a fun story!  Decluttering for fun & profit :)

I did my 15 minutes of paperwork sorting today & no more.  Got through a 2" stack of old insurance papers (2002-2006).  Some I am keeping as the policies are still in force, but several like the homeowner's and the life insurance have lapsed within the last 12 month period, so easy this attempt to get rid of.   A few more pages for Mr. X, too.

Looking at my posting history, it was 2 years ago in June that I first started tackling the paper monster.  At that time it was the equivalent of 7 banker's boxes.  That it's down to 3 (less than that now) now is such a huge encouragement!  At that time, I had papers scattered all over the office, too.  Now they are corralled to one small corner of the apartment.   Hopefully it's all as easy as it has been the last two days.  After current stacks are dealt with, I need to really develop good systems for incoming papers.

joonifloofeefloo

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #893 on: June 28, 2018, 10:57:06 PM »
Skookum job on every count, oneday!!

Fresh Bread

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #894 on: June 28, 2018, 11:39:44 PM »
Well done, oneday!

My builders have just finished with the messy work so my plan is to see how neat and uncluttered I can keep the kitchen til the painter comes in a month and also how I like it that neat. I think the problem I was having earlier is that once everything is removed, the unattractive kitchen units and surface are more noticeable. It's not in terrible condition but it's shabby and not to my taste and the dark worktop never looks clean.

oneday

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #895 on: June 29, 2018, 12:35:47 AM »
Thanks jooni & Fresh Bread for the encouragement!  It feels nice to clean up, and getting accolades here feels nice a second time. 

Fresh Bread, sounds like a good length of time for an experiment.  Once you have the results you will know what to do.

Linda_Norway

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #896 on: June 29, 2018, 02:47:13 AM »
Well done, oneday!

My builders have just finished with the messy work so my plan is to see how neat and uncluttered I can keep the kitchen til the painter comes in a month and also how I like it that neat. I think the problem I was having earlier is that once everything is removed, the unattractive kitchen units and surface are more noticeable. It's not in terrible condition but it's shabby and not to my taste and the dark worktop never looks clean.

Is it made of wood? In that case you could polish and oil. Otherwise could you paint it?

Mongoose

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #897 on: June 30, 2018, 10:33:09 AM »
Today: unpacking from trip. Everything needs to be stowed! We also have convinced the kids that there HUGE cardboard houses can be photographed and recycled. We''ve had them in the way for a year.

DH wants to go through the whole house and declutter it! Going to take forever but I just don't do well trying to sort through all our stuff by myself. Plus the kids are more on board when both parents are helping.

Edited to add: the whole family just spent nearly 3 hours on kid1's room. A favorite book lost in the clutter precipitated a willingness to do a major cleaning. One laundry basket of stuff to donate and 20 gallons of recycling/trash. Kid2 is now begging to be next.
« Last Edit: June 30, 2018, 02:26:03 PM by Mongoose »

mspym

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #898 on: June 30, 2018, 04:44:58 PM »
I have a pile of hangers to take to the op-shop, now that I have downsized my wardrobe and Ofpym is thinking of down-sizing and consolidating his bass collection. We bought an instant pot and are now finding new homes for the pressure cooker, slow cooker and yogurt maker. So much additional kitchen space.

oneday

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Re: Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2
« Reply #899 on: June 30, 2018, 09:56:39 PM »
Mongoose, good work getting unpacked right away.  I always struggle with that, but it feels so good to get it done!  Your place is going to feel so much more homey when you all are done. 

mspym, great work on the wardrobe!  In my area, a lot of the places won't take hangers. Which seems silly, because people (at least I) would like to buy used hangars just as much as any other household good.

==============================================================

Didn't work on papers  Friday because I worked till 8 pm, plus was fasting since 7:30pm for blood work this morning.  Didn't seem like a good time to push myself.

Today I did 15+ minutes.  I thought I had found all the expired credit cards 2 years ago, but found another today!
 The next little bit in the box I'm clearing out was inherited papers.  Folks, I get my paper hoarding tendencies from *both* parents.  Two files were different life insurance polices my Dad had (he died in 2008).  He valued them very highly because he had a congenital heart defect that meant most carriers wouldn't insure him.  These were both group policies from former employers that he was able to keep after leaving those companies.  I saved a few pages from each which had samples of his handwriting and dated back to 1975.  Found his resume from 1990, and parent's tax return from 1999, their last as a married couple.  These papers I'll scan later on.